we all know the scenario. college buddies vacation in gary, indiana cancun. guy meets stripper named “apathy” lovely grad student from charlotte. guy and girl hit it off. guy and girl intend to take full advantage of the “what happens…” rule, but because girl has giant tat of velociraptor stretched across both buttcheeks guy barely knows girl, guy is extra cautious and decides to double up.
well, according to spike.com’s “the top ten lies you’ve been told about sex“, not only is doubling up redundant (whats the point of having sex if you can’t feel a thing?)…it’s dangerous.
7. Wearing Two Condoms Offers Double the Protection
Wearing two condoms not only does not offer additional protection from pregnancy or STD/STIs, it actually increases the likelihood of contracting a disease. Condoms are relatively reliable (90-95%) prophylactics, and if you require further peace of mind, you should use redundant birth control in the form of a pill, injection, or any of a variety of other options. However, putting two condoms on actually increases the friction between the two condoms. It’s like rubbing two pieces of sandpaper together until one of them rips. You want that on your schlong? Don’t double bag it!
along with the condom conundrum, the article touches on wang size, the g-spot (or lack thereof) and other popular sexual misconceptions, including one that could surely put salt in the games of headwhisperers around the world.
4. Semen is Low-carb and Atkins-approved
Here’s the skinny: The average male ejaculate is about 4 milliliters. And, although there is protein in semen (the sperm, namely), it is largely comprised of fructose which is a sugar, and totally not Atkins-approved. However, the energy in a typical load amount to a measly seven calories. So, let’s just say that you’re giving your girl 14 shots a day – a noble goal. That’s about 100 calories. It would take a month for her to put on a pound of “semen weight.”
so, people of vsb, is this list gospel or gunk? dogma or dookie? bona fide or bullsh*t?
also, what are the worst lies you’ve been told about sex?
—the champ
Aww the lies, the first lie i was told was, giving fellatio gives you a whiter smile and glowing skin.
(i was a bit gullible back in the day’s)
@JamaicanGirl,
Try harder. Sorry…I had to.
@JamaicanGirl,
I should cuff yo ass n’ lock you up. I don’t know if that is gullible or just plain schoopid. HeHe.
Me loves you anyway
@JamaicanGirl,
aww. that’s cute.
@JamaicanGirl, “giving fellatio gives you a whiter smile and glowing skin”
I was told the same lie lol.
@JamaicanGirl,
“giving fellatio gives you a whiter smile and glowing skin.”
it does. just ask luvvie
@The Champ, her skin dont glow, its just ash
@Peysonic Temple #69,
Don’t be talkin bout my friend!
@JamaicanGirl, I heard it would put some weight on me… I was dreadfully thin back in the day
that I could get pregnant by kissing
that if I ever put a dudes “ding a ling” in my mouth it would cause my jaw to elongate giving me the “horse mouth” and everyone would know i was a penis licker…LOL
that having s.e.x before marriage is the main cause of mental retardation in children!
LOL Thank God for s.e.x ed and parents that werent with that bull…
@shay_d_lady,
“that having s.e.x before marriage is the main cause of mental retardation in children”
Yeah, it’s the MAIN CAUSE if you’re having sex with your relatives! Yeah that’s nasty, I know, but it’s the truth, lol.
@RedBeanzNRice,
Yeah, it’s the MAIN CAUSE if you’re having sex with your relatives!
you know what, i read somewhere that this is a myth as well. the only relatives that matter are brothers and sisters. cousin coitus doesnt have any more birth defect risk than anything else.
***slowly backing away from comment after realizing he just made a subtly pro-incest argument***
@The Champ,
You’re still getting the Lady Cameroon **side eye** from me for that one…
@The Champ,
Deserves the side eye. And this is wrong. First cousins does increase the risk of crazy or genetic disease that grandma may be hiding (since grannys giving the kids a double dose). And any incest increases the risk as opposed to gen. pop. but the worst and most likely is brother and sister. I mean if ya’ll are 3rd cousins 2wice removed then the risk is close to you and pookie from roxbury, esp if pookie got a crazy uncle. But the difference is if 1st cousins your risk is prolly as high as you and someone with known problems in the family. So if you’re pro-incest maybe you’re just pro-people with crazy relatives.
**end of nerdliness for the day**
@willnotbetelevised, I mean if ya’ll are 3rd cousins 2wice removed
you know, i’ve never understood the whole once or twice removed thing. one of my highschool english teachers tried to explain it, then she got frustrated and changed the subject. i understand that my parents’ siblings’ children are my first cousins, and i thought that my first cousins children would be my second cousins, so how does someone become a “once or twice removed” cousin?
maybe i should just google it…
@A Plus,
wikapedia it, that’s how i learned, its actually understandable the way they explain it and they have chart., but some of those terms like once removed are just a different way of saying like third or fourth or something like that.
@A Plus,
whateva i dont even date my homies relatives shiiiiiiiiiii
@A Plus,
That confuses me too. What makes it even harder for me to understand is that a cousin in the western concept is not always a cousin in my culture!
@YGB,
I had the same problem! Somebody was calling their mom’s cousin, their cousin too… I was like, wait, shouldn’t she be your aunt?
In my culture, the word “cousin” doesn’t exist… There is only one word for it all “brother/sister”… It tells you where they stand on incest. Lol!
@A Sula,
In my culture you can only be cousins if my mom & your dad are siblings – otherwise everyone’s a brother/sister.
@The Champ,
This reminds me of Steve Harvey’s Strawberry Letter where this woman married her brother. She didn’t know he was her brother until they went to a picnic and he saw her talking to his dad. He asked her how did she know that was his dad, and they were like oh s*** and she said that this was her dad. I was like WOW!
@Ms. T, did they stay married?
@A Plus, She was asking Steve what she should do, I don’t know what the outcome was.
@The Champ, you’re right. unless you and your cousin happen to be carriers of the same genetic trait which leads to a deformity of some sort, which is possible, but just not likely.
@shay_d_lady,
i think there’s a difference between lies adults believe about sex versus lies parents tell their kids so they aren’t knocking boots during adolescence lol
LOL, that’s exactly what I was thinking. And furthermore, I think I’ma pass some of these lies on to my kids when I have them…
@8th Wonder,
“I’ma pass some of these lies on to my kids when I have them…”
Mother of the year in the making on deck!!!
@RedBeanzNRice,
Lol, I dont blame her! Props to 8th for making sure she dont become Grandma of the year!
@Dom,
Me either! Heck I was planning on doing the same thing as her, lol.
@Dom,
Right! Shoot, ain’t no grandma up in THIS dancery! My kids are going to think penises shoot out sadness and famine until they graduate from college.
@ Aif Wondra
My kids are going to think penises shoot out sadness and famine until they graduate from college.
Hilarious, that was. Hate that I love you, I do.
@Gem-balaya, my sister in law and I recently had this conversation as her oldest was going off to college she told him to remember that she got pregnant with him while on 2 forms of birth control… to make sure he kept it wrapped or else he would be a dad since he comes from some strong “genes” she told the same thing to her 17 year old daughter (same but different)
She wasn’t lying my sis in law is probably the most fertile woman I know, she was on some time of bc when she became pregnant with each of her 5 children. That and my brother potentially has titanium covered spermazoa
Ole titanium-adamantium covered sperm…no thanks!
@8th Wonder,
Ol Wolverine style living in the uterus in perpetuity lookin’ sperm….
@Intellectual Hedonist,
I think your S-I-L may have been on BC but wasn’t using it right, i.e. skipping days and ish and that’s how it happened to her.
the biggest lie sold though is that you can s.e.x a guy into loving you…
WRONG
@shay_d_lady,
yeah. but you CAN chex him into doing everything he can to get your attention long after the chex is over.
i.e. you can chex him into a stalker.
@iloVEGrits,
“you can chex him into a stalker”
I approve this message
@iloVEGrits,
you can chex him into a stalker.
t-shirt potential
@iloVEGrits,
stalker- naw no cooch is that good niggs aint got free time like that
@BLUNTBLAZER,
you’d be surprised.
@iloV.E.G.rits,
surprised at what?
super good cooch? or nigg wit hella free time/gas to stalk? lol
@BLUNTBLAZER,
“naw no cooch is that good niggs aint got free time like that”
can you please tell that to the guy that knocked on my door at 3am a couple of weeks ago (while I was entertaining)
@Intellectual Hedonist,
hahahahaha – tell it like it is! IH in the house!!
@Intellectual Hedonist,
3am knockin wow thas kinda spooky no body bettta knock on my door at 3am uninvited unless its rosie perez or selma hi-yak
@shay_d_lady, There are a lot of GROWN MEN & WOMEN that still think that is the truth. Sadly, good chex is just good chex. You can make me want more…but you cant make me love you while you giving it to me LOL!
“The average male ejaculate is about 4 milliliters. ”
Yeah, I had to re-read that sh*t, cause I thought “Whoa, who measures how far the jizz spews?” *sighs*
Darn this vodka/cranberry! Darn it to heck!
But back to the topic at hand…
The worst lie I was ever told about sex is that the first time DOESN’T hurt. Horse-pucky!!
The second worst lie was that having sex while on your period** will put a “you’s mine” curse on him – kinda like burying his draws with a chicken foot in the backyard. (Yep, my family and family friends are from Louisiana – loopy as hell, but I don’t blame the state)
** I never tried it, lol.
@RedBeanzNRice, The second worst lie was that having sex while on your period**
how about all the how to stop your period remedies ???? all of them some lies
@shay_d_lady,
DAMN
*Spits out Apple Cider Vinegar*
Guess I’ll be testing out that “You’s Mine” theory. . . .
@AngelicNastyness,
LMAO!!!!! you must not have used the organic kind…
@shay_d_lady,
4 milli wow that aint nada
@shay_d_lady,
First time I ever heard anything about “remedies” was from an episode of the Cosby Show, lol. It cracked me the hell up cause I was like “What? They really fell for that mess back in the day?”
But from a firsthand hearing, the only thing I ever heard that would stop the flow (and only temporarily) was being immersed in water. And the only reason I heard that was because in gym class, we had to take swimming, so I tried used my TOTM as an excuse cause I didn’t wanna get my jheri curl wet. (Don’t act like I’m the only one that rocked one, lol)
Come to find out – it’s true! Being immersed in water stops your flow. Now all we have to do is figure out a way to stay immersed for up to 7 days, and we got a patent!
@RedBeanzNRice, Come to find out – it’s true! Being immersed in water stops your flow. Now all we have to do is figure out a way to stay immersed for up to 7 days, and we got a patent!
that didnt work for me …LOL maybe it only works if you are emerged in water and not…… well I wont say for fear of giving anymore TMI….LOL
oh and LMAO@I didn’t wanna get my jheri curl wet girl we didnt have swimming in my school but yeah that jerri curl was never right after a tangle with some water…
@RedBeanzNRice,
so I tried used my TOTM as an excuse cause I didn’t wanna get my jheri curl wet. .
Speaking of jheri curl I saw two girls with jheri curls last night at the baseball game. I smelled the activator before I spotted the curl. I had to take a pic with my phone because I couldn’t believe that they were rocking them.
@V Renee,
I almost had to smack my girls mother when I saw her. Her parents immigrated some 7 years before she did from Nigeria and when she came over here her mother said all the girls were wearing jheri curls. She had a jheric curl for nearly a year before she realized she was the only one. this was in 2002! Wondering why she wasn’t making any friends or sheeit. I guess mama didn’t want her getting popular, meeting boys or running wild but that was some BS. And you could only find jheri juice in the African corner store. crazy
@willnotbetelevised,
lmfao! It was an evil plot to prevent an active social life!
@willnotbetelevised,
Im with Dom. Instead of feeding her s3x myths, they just gave her a jheri curl instead. That will definitely guarantee no action!
@V Renee, please send pix to champ or panama so that we can see please
@Peysonic Temple #69,
I will!
@V Renee,
“I smelled the activator before I spotted the curl.”
Girl, you made me spit my Mango Madness Snapple on my monitor with that one! CTFU!
@RedBeanzNRice,
<<<<<<I’m from New Orleans… Giving the man the BIZZ while your friend is in town……..Hmmmmmm.
<<<<<<Does it work…… NO COMMENT!
@RedBeanzNRice,
“Don’t act like I’m the only one that rocked one, lol”
You aint the only one that had one. Dont get me started…and I had the banana clip on one side thang going on.
“Come to find out – it’s true! Being immersed in water stops your flow. Now all we have to do is figure out a way to stay immersed for up to 7 days, and we got a patent!”
This has never worked for me. It seems like it flows more in the water.
@mssmtaylor,
“This has never worked for me. It seems like it flows more in the water.”
Seriously? Hmm. I guess it depends on the person then, cause it sure works for me. I just assumed it was the same with everybody.
@RedBeanzNRice,
Create water panties! LOL
@Ms. T,
will those be in the same section as vagina panties?
@PrincesMo,
LOL we will have them there and also in the area with the pool supplies
@Ms. T,
Woooo – I LOVE IT! I’m on the way to the patent office as we speak! RedbeanZ Water Draws (patent pending)
@RedBeanzNRice,
Don’t forget to give me my cut.
@Ms. T
I was gonna be greedy and act like you didn’t come up with the idea, lol, but I’m feeling generous. Shall we say 90/10 split?
@RedBeanzNRice,
Dang 90/10! Sure, all you want is 10% that’s cool! ahaha.
@shay_d_lady,
Hahahaha Like Tylenol and Hot Cocacola!
@shay_d_lady,
Some of those remedies actually work…. or so I’ve heard…
@Sula,
Which ones? (twisting my mouth)
@RedBeanzNRice,
“kinda like burying his draws with a chicken foot in the backyard.”
This is a very potent spell, not for amateurs.
@iloVEGrits,
Nope…or so I’ve heard…lol
@miss t-lee,
Yes Harlem Nights was a good movie… ‘so you heard’
@willnotbetelevised,
LOL!!! My Grandma’s folks is from Louisiana, so I’ve “heard” of plenty…
@willnotbetelevised,
They only gave up PART of the “secret” on Harlem Knights. Where you think that myth came from?
@RedBeanzNRice,
I heard a ton of these when I went to school down south. I could never bring myself to drink cups of vinegar at a time though. I’ll take the reds!
@RedBeanzNRice,
** I never tried it, lol.
***letting you borrow my neighbors as your “more people”***
@The Champ,
Neighbor deez. Oh wait, I meant Borrow deez. Aw hell, screw it, lol.
@RedBeanzNRice, Never heard the sex while on your menses thing before. I thought it was if you put a little ME juice in his food he’d be yours for life. I never tried either of them.
@Yaa,
Seargant General’s Warning: My friend had a cousin that did that, and when she tried to leave the guy he killed her, i guess it worked too well.
@PrincesMo,
Oh wow. Yeah I’ve heard guys who refuse to eat a chick’s spaghetti because of this.
@V Renee,
I know plenty of dudes who will only eat spaghetti if they watch the chick make it…lmao
From start to finish.
@miss t-lee,
yea and yall wonder why black dude dont eat italian food. strait BBQ all year
@PrincesMo,
Damn. Thats tough! I heard this one down south too.
@PrincesMo,
“My friend had a cousin”
why is it that we never heard from the actual person that did it, but its always 3 degrees or more of separation?
Feel free to provide more people
@Yaa,
Tha fukk??
Champ where’s the rest of the list?
@Satya,
I was thinking the same thing when I read this. Why have the numbers if they don’t really correspond to a list that YOU are making?!?
@Satya, ivy st,
twin weirdos, theres a link at the beginning of the second paragraph
@The Champ,
Yeah but we like when u add your Champ humor. Of course I can read from this site or any site on any given day. Once you bring it up, I expect you to add a little extra. Thanks!
@Ivy St.,
yup yup we need the play by play comentary
@BLUNTBLAZER,
i saw the link tho lol
2 rubbers? did they really need to explan that one.
I always thought is was just a joke/or slang for “that chick gets around watch ya self” i didnt think people actually took it to heart
@BLUNTBLAZER,
Me too! Like do people really think putting one thing made out of latex on top of something else made out of latex will provide better protection?
“It’s against the laws of physics” (wkcite L Boogie)
@Satya, I was looking for the “next” link or something!!
I don’t know where I heard these, probably in H.S.,
1. if you “accidently” let him shoot inside you all you need to do is dooche!? and you won’t get preggers smh and lol
2. If you’re on period you’ll stop bleeding if you do it standing up
3. As Jada said so well…please don’t hit me with the 2 worst lines…I don’t do that and this is my first time…particularly in reference to men who fake like they don’t eat the goodies…puh-leaze
@maria, “I don’t do that.” If those words come out of someones mouth they should not be having sex in the 1st place.
@Mr. Mister,
Co-sign TOTALLY!!! I have spoken those exact word to many….
Am I the only one that missed this whole lies about sex class?
@Officer Ricky,
lol, so you didnt go to high school?
@Officer Ricky,
I think you and I both missed that class.
In school, girls who had sex much earlier than I did had all kind of lies:
- Douche w/ Pepsi prevents pregnancy
- Standing up straight for 10 minutes after chex prevents pregnancy
- Straight penie action will bring you to orga$m
- chex doesn’t hurt the first time
@iloVEGrits,
douche with pepsi!? oh my, but that hurts. even though i’m only doing it in my mind.
i appreciate that i was warned about the pain of sex. my older trampy cousin was like, “it hurts the 1st time and the 2nd and the 3rd and then a little less the 4th and….”
so i was just happy on that 5th time when it didn’t hurt because she set up for like 4 years of straight pain.
@charli skipper,
“Straight penie action will bring you to orga$m”
It can, but only in a small percentage of women. The figures (depending on where you read) range anywhere from 15% – 30%
@iloVEGrits,
“Straight penie action will bring you to orga$m”
I wish someone would have told me this was not so true in most women in my younger years or before my first big O!
Only after my first “Tweet” moment did I realize that I TOO had a part in this human play. LOL!
In any case, I agree that all the extra stuff isn’t needed once you get a handle on your “good time.” Before you’ve had a chance to master it, waiting around for an inexperienced man to open the flood gates is RIDICULOUS!
@iloVEGrits,
Douche w/ Pepsi prevents pregnancy .
Ewwwwwwwww
@iloVEGrits,
“- Douche w/ Pepsi prevents pregnancy”
Possibly FOREVER, lol. Girl don’t you know you can use Pepsi to degrease and airplane engine?
@RedBeanzNRice,
I thought it was Coke???
@V Renee,
Cat food/dog food – same difference, lol. I knew it was one of those brown bubbly drinks, lol.
I’m drunk. Bye.
@iloVEGrits,
what did u have?
Cosmo with Grey Goose?
@Ivy St.,
Martinis.
lol.
@iloVEGrits,
my kinda girl lol. except im like that most weekends when the baby is gone.
@iloVEGrits,
lol
Say something else about Gary. I’m borderline offended. LOL. Shoot. I reps my city!
@Ange,
Michael?
@charli skipper,
lol
@Ange,
“Say something else about Gary. I’m borderline offended. LOL. Shoot. I reps my city!”
Why?
@Humble_One,
Gary is hardcore I had to take greyhound from va to cali (long story) and we stopped in gary indy. No lie I hopped off the bus for maybe a min and saw a car chase with a group of ni99s shootin at another car full ni99s im duckin like wtf. The bus driver was like a-wax from Menace talkin bout “come on ni99az”
@Ange,
Ange, I’m down the street in Dayton.
@Ange,
what are you gonna do about it?
@The Champ,
lol@ Ange tryna bring a laptop to a gun fight!
@Ange,
Hey, Ange! I’m right down I-65 in Indy. You coming down for any of the race festivities?
@Ange, That’s right represent for the Jacksons & the steel mills!!
@Ange,
My parents and most of my family is from there and it’s pretty damn grimey there. I don’t go ANYWHERE in Gary by myself when I go. I don’t even like standing outside after 4 pm
Champ, I am upset. How could you have a post with a picture of a unicorn and not mention me? The nerve…. le sigh…. I’ll be back… I guess….. *wall slide*
@Naturally Alise,
LOL!! i saw the pic was like “awwwww haven’t heard about alise’s unicorns in a long time”
@Naturally Alise,
i’m sorry. i didnt realize that she was from your stable. where do i send the royalties?
you can make an e-payment at paydeez.com
@8th Wonder, YESSSSSSSSSSSS!
@8th Wonder,
ZING!!
i got the whole, “if i put the tip in that’s not chex. so it’s okay if we don’t use protection.” but don’t worry, i didn’t fall for it…
@charli skipper,
What’s ever worse is that kat are still runnin’ around using this ish…lol
Glad you didn’t fall for the okey doke.
I straight missed this class!
but damn….” giving fellatio gives you a whiter smile and glowing skin.”
LMFAO! I wouldn’t have fallen for that one no sir!
@Dope Fiend,
Yeah…me neither.
@miss t-lee,
Don’t judge me.
@RedBeanzNRice,
lol!!!
@RedBeanzNRice,
actually i heard back in the day that the french use it as lotion or sumthin i would google the article but im to buzy at work lol
@BLUNTBLAZER,
That could explain why people smell so funny in France. Love Potion #9?
@RedBeanzNRice,
and why they skin always shiny.
olive oil my a$$
I’m going to see Star Trek on IMAX tonight!! WhooHOo!!
now, to the topic at hand…lies i heard about chex….
–it doesn’t hurt the first time
–drinking a little wine will make the first time easier, and it won’t hurt as much (whatever ni99a!!)
I think that’s about it. And we learned about the negative consequences of double condoms in 9th grade chex-ed. SMH @ the college student who didn’t know better.
@N.I.A. naturally….,
And we learned about the negative consequences of double condoms in 9th grade chex-ed
you know, i don’t think i ever took a sex ed class, sans for that week with the sub in physics, where we were allowed to watch “the lost boys”
@The Champ,
sex ed was hella fun back in tha day memba that infamous swimming sperm movie (yall know yall saw it dont hate) with the old dude narrating “millions of sperm are realeased but only one will penetrate” then the one thug makes it thru n all the dudes in class are cheering.
@BLUNTBLAZER,
Yeah I remember that vid and if I knew better I woulda booed that one thug for making it through
@N.I.A. naturally….,
Make sure its the IMAX and not the liemax
http://www.liemax.com
@Dorian G.,
thanks for the link. I’m going here. http://www.imaxraleigh.org/
and this link http://www.lfexaminer.com/theaUSA.htm#NC
says I’m good. I can’t wait to see this…I might leave work early….
@N.I.A. naturally…., “I’m going to see Star Trek on IMAX tonight!! WhooHOo!! ”
I did that Sunday. It is seriously a great movie (and I hated the show!)
EVERYONE HAS HERPES!
…Kinda. It’s less so a lie I’ve been told, but more so some facts that have been left out of many STD conversations, but you can test negatively for herpes and still have it. How you ask?
1) The virus may not be strongly present at the site in your body where the blood is being drawn. This weak/lack of a presence will make the test come up negative.
2) If you are not experiencing a flare-up the day you get tested, the test will come out negative.
3) Your body’s natural immune system may be strong enough to fight the virus (such cases as where you see no physical symptoms of herpes) making the test come out negative.
And slightly related, there are no detrimental effects of herpes aside from its physical symptoms on the skin. Also, there is almost no difference in Simplex A (the cold sore) and Simplex B (the STD.) Apparently people with Simplex A have been going down on people with Simplex B, causing some hybrid herpes.
@Jarrod Halsey,
Buzz Killington
@miss t-lee,
You’z a fool I swear…. but you right on the money.
I was reading that like “dayum kinda makes me wanna keep my vagina panties on.
@mssmtaylor,
Shooot…reading that made me wanna get full body condoms ala the Naked Gun movie.
@Jarrod Halsey,
“Apparently people with Simplex A have been going down on people with Simplex B, causing some hybrid herpes.”
-um yuck, and this is just one of the reasons why cellibacy has its perks lol
@Jarrod Halsey, Thanks for the PSA. All this stuff is true and needs to be put out there cuz very few people apparently know all of this.
@Jarrod Halsey,
So dang – Rihanna gave us ALL the herp?
@RedBeanzNRice,
LMAO!!!
@Jarrod Halsey, hybrid herpes scares me
@A Plus,
Makes you wanna boil everybody before you sleep with them..
@A Plus,
If that scares you wait till you hear a story about cat aids. smh why have I heard about this shyt. lol
Add this to your horribly indexed list, Champ.Myth number 3: That all women bleed their first time. I think if you play sports, fell in a bike or have used a tampon etc before chex, then this does not apply. Men should be warned (especially if you are sleeping with a “surgeon”)!
I did NOT bleed my first time and my partner called me EVERY horrible name he could come up with…
Not the way to start this new chapter. LOL!
@Ivy St.,
I did NOT bleed my first time .
Me either. oh wait scratch that since I’m still a virgin and all.
@Ivy St.,
Dang, I got told a bunch of nonsense I laughed off but I was never told the 2 most important 1) first time hurts (at least momentarily before it feels really good!) and 2) you may bleed. I was confused and concerned he had called up that damn Aunt afterwards. Nobody was looking out for me …
@Ivy St.,
Add this to your horribly indexed list, Champ.
index deez
@Ivy St.,
Thats terrible! What an a** hole. I hope that was the first and last time he got any from you!
@Ivy St., yeah i didn’t bleed either, but it still hurt like hell!!
shame on him for calling you names! i hope you molly wopped his dumb arse
@Ivy St.,
I did not bleed either.
@Sula,
*sighing* looking off in the distance dreamily.
Size doesn’t matter. Partially true, as it doesn’t matter, if you only ever have one size. BUT, once you have tried differing sizes, you find that some just don’t …reach places that others do.
Women only org from cunning lingus-not true.
If you are with a “larger” guy, or gettin it woof woof style, your back regions will grow! Lmao, I tried and tried!!! No dice! All treble, hardly any base. Liars!!!
You can’t get preggo the first time.
You can’t catch anything and you’re still a virgy if you just give “blowpops”
These were all myths, but there’s a whole nutter list of the lies men tell about their personal chex!!! That one is even more hilarious!
@treble,
LOL size ABSOLUTELY matters.
@Ashley Neicole,
“LOL size ABSOLUTELY matters”
Indeed it does.
I dont think I could hang with a guy whose size wasnt up to code. I need to inspect the car before I test drive it.
@treble,
If you are with a “larger” guy, or gettin it woof woof style, your back regions will grow! Lmao, I tried and tried!!! No dice! All treble, hardly any base. Liars!!! .
OMG yeah this may have been the biggest lie I heard. And when chicks’ azz would get fatter they would say she must be getting hit woof woof style on the regular. Even though more than likely it was because of birth control.
@V Renee, Treble,
This is Definitly one of those lies that I fell for………… If that shyt really worked… would have HELLA CAKES right now!….. Now.. 12 years later after I gave up the goodies for the very first time…. I STILL CANT PASS THE PENCIL TEST! (for those that who dont know what the pencil test is…. “they” say that if you can hold a pencil under your butt cheek, then you are considerd to have muchazz)! LOL! My birthday is on Monday yall… I will be 29…. and do you know I still get told this by ninjas!
@Laneianna,
for those that who dont know what the pencil test is…. “they” say that if you can hold a pencil under your butt cheek, then you are considerd to have muchazz
i must have missed this portion of health class at st. barts
@The Champ,
4 real my minds is going crazy with hella visuals.
I heard about the cup on the booty test.
or the marble bounce test (lay the chick down, stand up and drop a marble on a cheek if it bounces you good if it dont you just aint got it)
@Laneianna,
I thought the pencil test pertained to if you could go braless or not.
@Laneianna,
“for those that who dont know what the pencil test is…. “they” say that if you can hold a pencil under your butt cheek, then you are considerd to have muchazz”
LOL, i never heard about this before, but i just did at work in my cubicle while no1 was looking (i have on a skirt) and i passed lol! thats so funny made me litterally lol
@Laneianna, “for those that who dont know what the pencil test is…. “they” say that if you can hold a pencil under your butt cheek, then you are considerd to have muchazz”
I learn something new every day
@Laneianna,
Ya.. Everyone I know sez the pencil test is for saggy boobs. Couldn’t you pass the pencil test if you had saggy @ss?
@Laneianna,
“they” say that if you can hold a pencil under your butt cheek, then you are considerd to have muchazz)”
Do those fat ergonomic pencils count? I sure do hope so.
@V Renee, Um. Can I get the name of that birth control? please and thank you.
@Nicki Sunshine,
LMAO – The shot aka Depo aka Devil in a syringe.
* that if done pre-marriage (including “pastor.nation” he he), all your dead relatives are called by the Blessed Virgin Mary to see you for.ni.cate. And they shed a tear when they see you tearing up those sheets (it could be true though- who knows?)
* that men secretly don’t like it
* that is done right, you black out (and see stars upon revival)
* that lub.ri.cation is for slu.tty girls
* that really nice women don’t feel a tingle down there. Or there. Or there even.
*that pee is like antiseptic so if a man rubs his peeknees with it post unprotected secks, it can prevent AIDS and other STDs
* that it eventually gets old when doing it with the same person
All lies, propaganda and bamboozle-ment.
@Wanjiru,
* that really nice women don’t feel a tingle down there. Or there. Or there even.
Oh wow. This is so archaic .
@Wanjiru,
“* that is done right, you black out (and see stars upon revival)
I don’t know what experiences you have had, but I have seen shooting stars, glitter, unicorns, and confetti after a good session… That’s how I ended up staying with the crazy stalker for 3 years…smh…
@Naturally Alise,
No green clovers? lol
@Naturally Alise,
he he he @ stalker! But – and here’s the $640,000 question. Did you pass out?Black out? Become insensible and need sleeping salts to revive comatose you? The rumor was that if you get it well and good- they can even operate on you sans anesthetic as, well, you’re passed out. That you could choose *that* as an alternative to anesthesia.
Please whatever you do, don’t tell me this happens as we’ve been doing it wrong!!!!
@Wanjiru, I vouch for temporay black outs. My S.O. does it when im really getting it. Its not anything overly serious. If you keep going they may stay out longer, if you stop and call their name they might come back sooner.
I think its a kind of sensory overload. Like your synapses fire all at the same time, and your body goes out for a second to reorginize, take stock, and make sure everythings cool.
Lastly, all women folks dont pass out. You all are different. I think its something like the tantric, only a serious mental and physical connetion allows it + some physical thing that allows it, seperating a screamer or shaker from someone that “goes out”.
Oh no, I’m not comfortable with this at all, lmao!
@8th Wonder,
Oh twinny… the pass-out inducing chex is the BEES KNEES! You just have to trust that while ur out, he won’t rifle through your purse and steal your credit cards.
@8th Wonder, you made me laugh, girl. but, on the real…passing out? nah dude. i’m not comfortable with that sh*t either.
@8th Wonder,
Yeah…I don’t want none that good pass out.
Have me in a corner shaking from withdrawals and ish.
No BUENO!!!!
Seriously though, am I just there….passed out…whilst you continue?
uncomfortable.
@ESQuared,
This sounds like a sex scene from a frat boy comedy or something. I would pay to see this in action!
@Dom, idk if she would be down with that because well, lots of women arent down with that.
but i put EVERYTHING on the truth of it. My left AND right support staff,along with the main event.
If im lying may got smite me and use a lightning bolt to burn my business right off.
@Dom,
4 real thats sounds kinda scarey but freaky. I had one ex that couldnt go to sleep unless in beat it up and like clockwork after id finish she be out in less than 10 min cheesin like the jus came from the dentist.
@ESQuared,
LMFAO! How the hell do you prep somebody for that the first time? What do you say?
“Okay, now when I get that good n*t I might pass out for a few seconds. If its longer than a minute call 911!”
@Dom, You cant prep them for it the first time, it just kind of happens. its not like your gonna stop so you can just always talk about it later. lmao
And why should we call the Jake?, sometimes i just leave her sleep and wake her up later when its time for us to get something to eat. (gotta stay energized for round 2 and what not)
@Dom, … as a black out-er, I can say that we didnt expected it the first time. Its scary… but, then u play with it, find out what makes me black out and what makes e come back so it’s all good….
@Naturally Alise,
“but I have seen shooting stars, glitter, unicorns, and confetti after a good session…”
I can cosign on this.
Without the Unicorn though.
@Ivy St., oh you aint getting it in til you see a unicorn… lol
@Naturally Alise,
LMAO!!
@Ivy St.,
Actually great chex has it benifits. If you wanna watch the game bang her before tip off and if you wanna see the rest of the game get her again at half time plus you usually get a bomb a$$ sandwich made for you to enjoy while watchin tha game.
@Wanjiru,
“that pee is like antiseptic so if a man rubs his peeknees with it post unprotected secks, it can prevent AIDS and other STDs”
I’ve kinda heard this in the context that if you urinate after using the bathroom this decreases your chance of getting pregnant. The pee supposedly is warm and kills the sperm. hmmm
@Ivy St.,
pee doesnt come from the vag, it comes from the urethra…so peeing can’t kill spermies…BS! Peeing however CAN push out any bacteria introduced to the outer areas preventing UTI…This concludes your medical minute
@SxyScientst,
I heard this off a documentary on discovery that was describing female cecksual deportment. When they said that if a chick goes to micturate after the ceckcie time. She is trying to re-acidify the vagi area. Because ceamen is basic whereas the vagi juices n pee are acidic. Super worms can’t live in an acidic environment. Oh yeah in the video she went and peed cuz she had just got out from under her side piece, not her main squeeze.
@Wanjiru,
damn, lol. these are all terrible, terrible lies.
lol, and i appreciate the moderating ducking effort, but “lubrication” is safe.
@Wanjiru, * that it eventually gets old when doing it with the same person
there may be some truth to this myth
a very young Happy Meal unfortunately had terrible skin…so every 3rd ninja (since she was 12 mind you) told her that a little chexytime would clear up her acne…. I was too stubborn to fall for THAT nonsense
@Happy Meal, hey, idk why it didnt work for you. If my skin is acting up and I get it in, my skin clears up. (i think that only works if your acne is moreso hormone influenced though) Plus exercise can regulate your acne by itself, and Chex is the best exercise on the planet.
@ESQuared,
i agree with your entire statement. when i’m getting some on the regular(which hasn’t happened in a while) my skin is definitely clearer. so, until I can get some, bare minerals is my friend….
@N.I.A. naturally….,
true i figured its cause you are less stressed.
chex is one hell ofa drug
@Happy Meal,
If the acne flare up is caused by stress, then it can definitely help…
another lie about chex….
–teaching abstinence is the best form of chex education….
–giving out condoms means we condone teen chex….
–only slutty girls pastor-nate
–only slutty girls give oral chex
–it is the girls responsible to take care of all forms of birth control
–you can’t get a STD from oral
@N.I.A. naturally….,
“only slutty girls give oral chex”
LOL! This was the case in MIDDLE SCHOOL, but as a young women I not think those women had one up on all of us… getting in all those years of extra practice. LMAO!
@Ivy St.,
This is true…bless those girls, they can have whatever they like…
BlkBond
LOL @ this post!!!
Somebody…actually a whole lot of fools in high school and some dummies in college was like, “If the chick is on top, she can’t get preggo!”
Yeah the heck right!!!!!
And maybe this one is something that I’ve made up in my own mind to keep myself from participating…but, I refuse to believe that butt chex doesn’t have some type of negative effect on the bowels…..I just always thought of that region as EXIT ONLY.
Am I wrong?
@This Just In…Thursday’s the new Friday!,
“but, I refuse to believe that butt chex doesn’t have some type of negative effect on the bowels”
I know right? If you do it enough, I think it causes loose stools when you get older.
Don’t quote me on that cause when I was little I thought the way you had a bowel movement was because tiny little monkeys were on the inside pushing it out for you. *sighs* I may have shared too much.
@RedBeanzNRice,
Don’t quote me on that cause when I was little I thought the way you had a bowel movement was because tiny little monkeys were on the inside pushing it out for you. *sighs* I may have shared too much. .
I don’t even have a comment for this. Cause this sh*t right here. This sh*t right here.
SMH
@V Renee,
Lol, I know, I know – I shoulda used the edit button on that one.
@RedBeanzNRice,
You were one of Gods “special children” I presume
@Dom,
What you mean “were”? I’m still is.
@RedBeanzNRice,
@RedBeanzNRice,
Wow… just wow
@This Just In…Thursday’s the new Friday!,
I heard butt cecks makes booties n hips big.
@WuDaMan,
LIES!
The worst lie i was told?
“some thing in your d*ck breaks when you put it in the first time” (similar to a woman)
Then of course the constant media lies.
Chex isnt messy, sweaty, she only makes the sexiest sounds on earth during coitus.
ALLLLL lies.
@ESQuared,
“some thing in your d*ck breaks when you put it in the first time” (similar to a woman)
lol, damn. where the hell did you hear this?
@The Champ, You know how it goes. The cousins are sitting around trying to impress the younger cousins or just seem older talking about sh*t they dont know about as if they know it all…you know. (imean it wasnt as bad as the ramen packet incident you had but it was still pretty bad cause i believed it for another year until my first chex ed class)
@The Champ,
recent foreign boyfriend told me and showed me where. Non-circumscribed though and said that made the difference. Didn’t believe it though.
Oh and 25 y.o. and claimed it was the frenulum for the nosy.
Another sex lie, all black men have BIG man parts.
@Ivy St.,
Girl yes! Someone yell that from the rooftops!
@Ivy St.,
so very true….
@Ivy St.,
That is definitely a myth!!!
@Ivy St.,
Well… Ivy… I think that was more of a comparison to other ethnicities… I dunno.. On avg…. I think BLK MEN definitly have more “weight” on them. NOW does every single blk man posess that mighty MANDINGO…. no, but if I had to take a chance to go out in Glory, and I had to choose between a black man, and an asian one…… LOL!
@Laneianna,
LMAO! You’d choose the Asian?
@Ivy St., I’ve always heard that asians have smaller pennies that other ethnicities, and this guy in college told me that the reason why his wang was so small was because he was half asian…
@Ivy St., LMAO!!!
@Ivy St.,
That is a MYTH that needs to go out of the window.
Lies, lies, all lies I tell ya!
Oh yeah!!! The biggest ones in more recent years…back door action won’t hurt!! My arse it won’t!!!!!
My question…how do you know ninja??!!! I’m straight on that one sir. But now the jury is out on you Mr. Esquire! Lmao Yeah, not gonna be able to test that one out. Sorry.
Men won’t wait nowadays because they don’t have to. “We’re grown” YES they will.
Another ole skool statement…you don’t have to count him if you use a condom!! Ohhhh that one still makes me chuckle a lil inside.
@treble,
Ohhhh that one still makes me chuckle a lil inside.
just chuckle?
@treble,
“…you don’t have to count him if you use a condom!!”
That should be on a list of phrases hoes use.
@treble,
LOL or if he was a 1 timer you don’t have to count him either.
@Ms. T,
This one isn’t a lie. It’s the truth!!!
Sex gives you hips and a butt.
BOGUS
My friends used to tell me I was naive b/c I didn’t believe that shyt. To which I’d reply, “I’m alive. That means my mom had sex. She doesn’t have hips or a butt. It’s genetic, dumb@sses!”
I never understood how people could believe all the sex myths floating around. They’re so illogical.
@Voiceofreason,
“Sex gives you hips and a butt.”
Isn’t that what oral contraceptives do?
@Ivy St.,
It’s been my experience that they just make you gain water weight.
@Ivy St.,
“Sex gives you hips and a butt.”
Isn’t that what oral contraceptives do”
I’ve been chex’n for quit sometime and I have just now at 29 developed hips and azz.
@mssmtaylor,
REALLY? I just turned 29. Does that mean I can still get hips??? Lol!
@Voiceofreason,
“I just turned 29. Does that mean I can still get hips???”
No, Tisha Campbell.
@RedBeanzNRice,
naw i thought once a woman starts to get it they get that gap inbetween the thighs ya know tha upsidown triangle. so it does push the hips out. no?
@BLUNTBLAZER
No. If they got the triangle it was there from jump street. It has nothing to do with sex.
VSB: Where rumors are squashed, and Champ always says “verb” deez. Gotta love this place!
@RedBeanzNRice,
Hips or no hips, I’m too cute to be Tisha.
@Voiceofreason,
Tell it! You go girl!
@Voiceofreason,
“REALLY? I just turned 29. Does that mean I can still get hips??? Lol!”
for 29.99 you can get anything from the HSN channel lol.
I have no idea where these hips came from.
The older guy at my job told me that I wasnt gonna be a woman until either A. my hips and azz spread or B. I turned 30.
@mssmtaylor,
How the he11 does this come up in a work conversation?
@mssmtaylor,
Fux no! I don’t buy body parts, hair, nails, etc. What you see is what you get with me.
@Voiceofreason,
I don’t know about this one Voice…… I think I can look at a young girl, and tell if she is sexually active or not. Speaking from personal experience.. I promise you.. I didnt have TIG-GO’s until after I started doing the humpty dance. From the age of 17 to 20… I prolly went from a baby b.. to a full c/ small d
@Laneianna,
There are plenty of scrawny teenage girls who have sex regularly, and plenty of ones that are well developed (like I was) and wouldn’t dare go through with the act. I was a double D before I ever kissed a guy. I have friends who have been straight up and down their whole lives and started having sex in their early teens. Sex will never make you develop what you’re not genetically predisposed to develop. You get what you’re gonna get.
@Laneianna,
I been a member of the TOBS sing it got Bitties. Training bra?? Puh-leeze!
But I was living in the Virgin Islands till I graduated from high school.
So yeah, tis a big fat nasty lie.
Big feet means big men parts. A LIE!
“I just wanna give you face. We don’t have to do anything else”. Got me one time, I’ll admit that. Lol
@treble,
You’re not alone, I think we all fell for that at least 1 good time…lol
@treble,
“face”….i haven’t used that word in a while. LOL!!!
oh and big feet don’t mean shiggity….my biggest “experience” is the one with the smallest feet…and hands….weird, huh? LOL!!
@treble, This might be the biggest lie there ever was….and some people still believe that crap!
I know a guy who wears a size 14 shoe who’s snickers is fun sized as opposed to king size.
Men with big feet…. have to wear big shoes…. that is all
@klysha,
I know a guy who wears a size 14 shoe who’s snickers is fun sized as opposed to king size. .
Why must I weep?!?!?
@treble, You were supposed to make it true, get up, put your clothes on and leave! LOL
*side note: I got got like that too! LOL
@treble, ““I just wanna give you face. We don’t have to do anything else”. Got me one time, I’ll admit that. Lol”
I can’t top that. How about,
“Let me just put the head in.” They NEVER end there. I think I fell for that twice in my ADULT life. lmao
The worst things I’ve been told:
**Too much sex makes you bow legged.
**You can get pregnant from kissing.
**The first time I had sex my cousin (who was a virgin & an idiot) told me that I’d bleed a lot. So she dressed me and then paraded me over to my boyfriends house wearing ALL RED so I could hide the blood when I came back home.
**Only white girls gave oral. For years I thought I must be MIXED!!
@Yaa,
Only white girls gave oral. For years I thought I must be MIXED!!
Hilarious!!
@Yaa, i must be really tired, because i thought this said “the first time i had chex with my cousin”…
i’m going to bed.
@Miss Patterson, ewwww.
@Yaa,
**Only white girls gave oral. For years I thought I must be MIXED!!
LOL
@Yaa,
**Only white girls gave oral.
I thought that was true for years! White girls and nasty girls. I’m glad I learned the truth.
@Laneianna
I don’t know about this one Voice…… I think I can look at a young girl, and tell if she is sexually active or not. Speaking from personal experience.. I promise you.. I didnt have TIG-GO’s until after I started doing the humpty dance. From the age of 17 to 20… I prolly went from a baby b.. to a full c/ small d
Becareful with. I’m sure that people probably made that assumption of me when I blowuptuated from a small b to a d in one summer at 15. Mind you I hadn’t had a french kiss and mainted my v card until 19.
@treble,
I’m not even gonna discuss how long I maintained my V card! Let’s just say I almost broke a record. And other than typical weight loss and gain, the structure of my body has not changed a bit.
@Voiceofreason,
You just lost it last night?
@V Renee,
It was at night, but it wasn’t last night.
@treble,
“From the age of 17 to 20… I prolly went from a baby b.. to a full c/ small d”
thanks…now i can’t get kanye’s remix to “throw some d’s on it” outta my head
…and there’s no such thing as a “small d” when it comes to breasteses
dr. carver = certified mammagramologist…or whatever they’re called
the man lie: “if I can’t make you O, you must not really be attracted to me” reads: you don’t think my p*nis is big enough.
meanwhile, the look of mild satisfaction on his girl’s face is ignored.
*30 minutes pass…new position*
counter female lie: “guess what, baby? i came!”
man: “you did?”
female lie #2: “yeah, and it was a big one.”
@Miss Patterson,
i think you should continue the story up to lie 10
@The Champ, why? is that what your mammy does?
@Miss Patterson,
“why? is that what your mammy does?”
Bwuauahaahah – I wasn’t even ready for that one!
@RedBeanzNRice,
oooooooooooooooooooooh
champ she talkin bout yooooo
Moma!!!
@Miss Patterson,
LOL!
By the way, I heard the good news! Glad your moving back to the Burgh! Can’t wait to meet you in person.
@Miss Patterson,
LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!
*shedding tears from laughing so hard*
Pops to me:
Avoid the chicks that lift they skirts….
I ignored the advice
Welp, I guess I was never subject to hearing the lies, because my momma busted out medical texts on me and gave me the real deal. Oddly enough, sex was not a taboo subject in our home.
But…. purpoted MYTHS that are actually TRUE
* The g-spot does exist. And when hit correctly (usually rear- entry style) the O that comes from that >>>> clit.oral O.
*Women do e.jac.ulate. Well, talented ones, anyway.
*What you eat absolutely influences your ‘flavor’– this goes for MEN and WOMEN
*Women are blessed to be multiorgasmic. Pay attention to her and you will be her hero.
*Toe sucking is over-rated. Back of the knee sucking is NOT.\
*Sadomasochists do not all look and dress like Marylin Manson– nor does it imply there is something wrong with you.
*Role playing isn’t just for the movies.
@blackberry molasses, “What does it take to be a Herrrrroooooooo? Heeeeerrrrrooooo!”
@ESQuared,
Haaaaay, e-boo!
I ain’t got to tell you. U already know
@blackberry molasses,
“The g-spot does exist. And when hit correctly (usually rear- entry style) the O that comes from that >>>> clit.oral O.
Women are blessed to be multiorgasmic. Pay attention to her and you will be her hero.”
amen…..
@blackberry molasses,
“The g-spot does exist. And when hit correctly the O that comes from that >>>> clit.oral O.”
you ain’t neva lied.
@blackberry molasses,
*Toe sucking is over-rated. Back of the knee sucking is NOT.
ohhh sweet precious memories! whew…lol
@blackberry molasses,
“*Women do e.jac.ulate. Well, talented ones, anyway.”
talented???? what the shyt is that!
there’s nothing chexy about estrogen and excretion…of.any.kind.
@Carver The Great!,
I guess you don’t like ‘squirters’…. d’ah well…
@blackberry molasses,
“The g-spot does exist. And when hit correctly (usually rear- entry style) the O that comes from that >>>> clit.oral O.”
VERY TRUE! Menfolk take NOTE!
@blackberry molasses,
Thats why you my sis…you be droppin that knowledge.
@blackberry molasses,
strait truth here
a lie i was told was that “ain’t no p*ssy like New P*ssy!”
wait…
on second thought…
that’s the truest shyt i ever heard!
@Carver The Great!,
To the corner – stat! Do not pass go, do not collect $200! >>>>>>>
@RedBeanzNRice,
has anyone been keeping a “Carver in the Corner” tab?
is there a prize involved? i like to be rewarded for things i’m good at.
@Carver The Great!,
no.
@blackberry molasses,
no prize, or no tab?
@Carver The Great!,
neither. if there was, we’d have to do it for everyone, and there are some people *cough* Luvvie, Aif Wondra, Overit, Goodie..*cough* that would bankrupt the system.
@Carver The Great!,
LMAO…no comment
@Carver The Great!,
cant argue with that except sometimes it does suck when the new puss aint betta than the old one. “dont fuq up some 4 sho pu$$y tryna get some mo pu$$y , youll end up with no pu$$y”
@BLUNTBLAZER,
You quoting Devin the Dude?
lol
@miss t-lee,
you kno it
@BLUNTBLAZER,
Purely un-related f*ckery…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NisCkxU544c
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R7yfISlGLNU
I need to take my mind off the fact I’m hitting a research road block. Thought I would share
Thanks for reminding me Carver.
“P*ssy is just P*ssy”
LIES. some of these women have the Golden Lotus and others, well…ill paraphrase Stewie; “Do you think theirs any tred left on that tire or is it a little like throwing a hot dog down a tunnel?”
@ESQuared,
“Stewie; “Do you think theirs any tred left on that tire or is it a little like throwing a hot dog down a tunnel?”
LMAO! Too funny!
This comment made me disturb everyone around me.
I love Family Guy
@Ivy St.,
*dead*
@ESQuared,
I love me some Stewie Griffin.
Booooooooo…. the moderation police got me. And I didn’t even cuss..
@blackberry molasses,
But you were thinking it.
@RedBeanzNRice, LMAO
I have a few Ive been told
1) Hot sauce makes the cooch taste good – ery girl i told that to dam near fainted lol
2) There is a spot under ya pole that you can press to make you climax – It is the honest to god truth my homie told me cause i had one super wet chick that would make me foul out early ery time. But not any more.
3) asian chicks have slanted/supa tight coochies- i dunno my bm was part japanese and she stayed tight even afta she had the kid maybe its some truth to it neva had a loose asain
4) white chicks are the freakiest- idunnno personally i think latin girls are the freakiest. MPO.
thas all I got so far
@BLUNTBLAZER,
1) Hot sauce makes the cooch taste good – ery girl i told that to dam near fainted lol
WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY????
I should throw your azz in the clink for Making Terroristic Threats Against the NayNay.
No judge, no jury. Just a firing squad.
@blackberry molasses,
i was scared to eat cooch so he said you like hot sauce right. I said yea and he said well……………….
@BLUNTBLAZER,
a pox on his house and my his children have hooves!
@BLUNTBLAZER,
2) There is a spot under ya pole that you can press to make you climax – It is the honest to god truth my homie told me cause i had one super wet chick that would make me foul out early ery time. But not any more
That’s actually true.
@Sula,
yea i thought my homie was jus bs’n but i came to work on monday givin him dap and ole girl got her back blew out. It actually makes you bust seriously strong loads. I love playing target practice.
One that I’ve been told some men are good for telling is
“I need a magnum”
Only for that baggy arse conundrum to be pulled off by the vaccum of a tight pu! Or so I’ve heard. Why lie? If you reach your goal, we’re gonna find out anyway!
Baggy condoms are a bad look!
@treble,
Ahahahahahahaaa!! Tell them ninjas GTFOH with that bull.
@Ms. T,
i dunno when i go to 7/11 and get my 2 boxes of mags and 40 ounce Old E. I be like the pied piper chick jus fallow with they eyes bugged out. One chick actually gave me her # in line talkin bout you look like you bout tha give some one tha bizzness.
@treble, I once told a guy that if he has to pull it over his sac to fill it, its not a good look or fit
@Intellectual Hedonist, pull it over his sac to fill it
waaaaaaaaaaaaait a minute. huh?
I’ve heard quite a few but the ones I was always told as a young buck tryin to figure all the sex ish out was..
1) Masturbating too much can decrease your sperm count and or make you sterile. (still unsure bout that one)
2) Real men don’t eat cooch..(Lies, all lies I tell ya.) The older ninjas tellin me that was the main one’s in tha bedroom with a knife and fork..
3) Women with tongue rings give better head..(Took me a while to debunk that myth. Could neva find one willing to try it out or get one put in.)
Side note — If you gotta put on a goodyear tire..er, i mean 2 rubbers before you pipe a chick, (like the notorius Supahead) maybe that ain’t the one you need to be messin with..just a thought.
@Tx10inch,
Dead @ #2… Not a knife and fork! Lol!
@Tx10inch,
I hate toung rings esp the metal ones
worst invention known to man
Okay the bull shyt I done heard.
Skinny chicks got deep monkeys.
If you put some ear wax on it and they scream they burnin.
Some I heard on here…
If you don’t … it don’t count
if they … it don’t count
yaaaaaddda yadda yadda
@WuDaMan,
Skinny chicks got deep monkeys.
If you put some ear wax on it and they scream they burnin.
Oh yeah potna..cosign on skinny chicks. One of my life’s great mysteries…*scratching head*
tha earwax thing always intrigued me, but neva could remember to try it…
@WuDaMan,
If you put some ear wax on it and they scream they burnin
huh?
@N.I.A. naturally….,
Something I heard from my crazy shell shocked uncle. Well @ least they told him that when he went to the war.
@WuDaMan,
All chicks can squirt. *wall slide fetal position primal scream* Why must I cryyyyyyyyy.
@WuDaMan, *wall slide fetal position primal scream*
I hate you
@Intellectual Hedonist,
let me tell you something.
@WuDaMan, if you do it with WuDaMan it dont count
@Intellectual Hedonist,
CTFU! Sorry Wu, but you had that one coming! (Please do not insert “that’s what she said” joke here)
@RedBeanzNRice,
Oh yeah I have most of em coming. lol
@WuDaMan,
I meant coming deez!
awe fuhck it
@WuDaMan,
“If you put some ear wax on it and they scream they burnin”
What about Turtle Wax?
@RedBeanzNRice,
*dead*
I always found that two condoms thing stupid. If you need two hats to stick a broad, maybe you simply shouldn’t be stickin’ her.
And like Eddie Griffin once said, what about ya nuts?
Just a question here. Is the term Jerri Curl slang for girls??