Why It’s Wrong, Stupid, And Self-Defeating To Be Mad About Eric Benet’s “Redbone Girl”

Perhaps my favorite aspect of Twitter is how our reactions to it instinctively let us know exactly how “relevant” a star currently happens to be. For instance, no one bats an eye if a name like Obama, Lebron, or Rihanna is repeatably showing up in people’s mentions. The same concept could be applied to someone like Stevie J, except that for someone like him, their “relevance” is completely time dependent. (In Stevie J’s case, it’s dependent on whether “Love and Hip-Hop Atlanta” is currently airing or if Joseline has murdered him yet)

On the other hand, you have celebrities so far off the current relevancy grid that their name trending only inspires one immediate reaction:

“Oh shit, **** just died!”

With that being said, you can imagine my elation last week when seeing Eric Benet’s name all over Twitter, immediately thinking he was dead, feeling bad, feeling even worse for not feeling as bad as I thought I should, feeling completely shitty for asking myself if it would be wrong to sleep with a woman who used to be married to a dead guy, and feeling much better when seeing that he was in fact alive and that the only reason why he was trending was because of a song he recently released.

The song? “Redbone Girl.” The tweet-able issue? Some people were feeling a certain way about the fact that he devoted an entire song to light-skinned Black women.

After listening to the song and reading a few of the articles devoted to it, I knew what my official stance would be — “This controversy is so f*cking stupid it’s making my ears bleed” — but I wasn’t quite sure which angle I would take when writing about it.

I initially considered making a list titled “10 Reasons Why It’s Wrong To Be Mad About Eric Benet’s “Redbone Girl.” That list would have included perfectly legitimate reasons such as “Light-skinned Black women are Black people too” and “No one gave a shit when he made “Chocolate Legs,” and I also would have touched on how insane we looked giving a light brown-skinned Black man — Yes. Eric Benet is light brown-skinned. The only way he wouldn’t pass a paper bag test is if the paper bags had malaria — shit about writing a song devoted to light-skinned Black women. (“Damn you, Black man, for writing a song about women who happen to the same complexion you happen to be, you self-hating motherf*cker“)

Thing is, while that list would have worked, it would have taken attention away from what I hope is the main takeaway from this, Namely, the fact that becoming upset with people for praising lighter-skinned Black women does nothing but reinforce the opinion that lighter-skinned Black women are, in fact, generally more physically attractive than their darker counterparts. It’s affirmative action for attraction.

I understand that those upset with the Black community’s perpetual praise of mulatto redbone, quadroon, octoroon, and half-cave women feel that the criticism of said praise has historical and sociological merit. This is not incorrect. We have a long and complicated history of giving women “points” just for looking closer to White than other Black women. Even many of the darker-skinned Black women universally praised for their beauty tend to have physical features more synonymous with lighter-skinned women.

Thing is, while complaining about unfairness and eventually demanding that things are made more fair works with other injustices, you cannot demand that people start finding other people more attractive. Physical attraction just doesn’t work like that. You can’t rely on guilt or obligation to make things “equal”. Erections don’t give a damn about social justice.

And, as I said earlier, this process becomes self-defeating because when a person complains about the praise of light-skinned women it implies that the person doing the complaining also feels that light-skinned women are more attractive. It’s as if they’re saying “Them bitches already on top. They don’t need no more praise” — an assertion that makes their gripes disingenuous. It’s not about appreciating what other shades have to offer as much as it’s acquiescing to “defeat” and asking the victors not to stomp on your grave. You want men — and, to be clear, this isn’t all Black men. Not even most — to start praising darker-skinned Black woman more? Instead of getting pissed about the attention redbones receive, start the process by…not caring. Or, even better, start praising darker-skinned women more yourself.

Now, should I have touched on the fact that Eric Benet reached out to Lil Wayne — the founder, president, and social media manager of “f*ckdarkbuttbitches.com” — to drop a verse for this song? Maybe. Am I being generous with the hyperbole by calling this issue about a song seven people outside of the Benet family have actually heard a “controversy?” Definitely. You’ll have to forgive me, though. I’m just glad Eric Benet is still living, and I suggest those sore about redbone chicks getting praise from singers and rappers they wouldn’t be interested in dating anyway start living too.

—Damon Young (aka “The Champ”)

  • Dignan

    Off topic, but we occasionally touch on great black film on this board, and this weekend I saw an OUTSTANDING documentary called Thunder Soul. Each and every one of you who haven’t seen it need to see it.

    /Also………..First?

    • LeonieUK

      Thunder Soul is great I’m still holding out on the doc about female jazz singers of the 30′s and 40′s and the doc on military rape…now back to our original topic you first whoppppppiiiiieeeeee

    • https://twitter.com/#!/IluminatiNYC Todd

      I saw some of it when it first came out. It was one heck of a concept getting high school kids to play funk music back when they did, and the band teacher had balls of titanium for that. Good look.

    • Sweet GA Brown

      Is it on netflix?

    • Carla Kah

      I am dark-skinned. If you only like light-skinned girls then it’s on the next one. Why lose any sleep over something/one you do not need? ugh.

  • http://www.iamyourpeople.com I Am Your People

    Just played the song, I’m already mad at Lil Wayne for calling Eric Benet “Eric B.” Negro, unless you’re talking about half of Eric B. and Rakim…

    • http://voodoochile88.tumblr.com/ Craig and Dem

      *Take Em To Chucch!* Ain’t nobody gon ever be Eric B. unless that ninja Benet wanna battle on the 1s and 2s tell Wayne I said keep that ish to himself

      • https://twitter.com/#!/IluminatiNYC Todd

        Someone pass the collection plate on this one! There are some names that aren’t to be touched, and Eric B. is among them.

        • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

          “There are some names that aren’t to be touched, and Eric B. is among them.”

          lol, but this IS eric benet’s name, though

    • Rewind

      So let’s be clear…..we are not nominating him for president.

      • http://voodoochile88.tumblr.com/ Craig and Dem

        My Name is Craig and Dem and I approve this message.

      • JAYmatic

        LOL….

        No, we are not…..

  • http://www.twitter.com/reggierockit ChaoticDiva

    I don’t think I can take your post seriously due to the Twitter Murse Controversy.

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

      are you trying to get banned?

  • Royale W. Cheese

    Thank you for this post. Very, very well stated.

    “Now, should I have touched on the fact that Eric Benet reached out to Lil Wayne — the founder, president, and social media manager of “f*ckdarkbuttbitches.com” — to drop a verse for this song? Probably”

    OMG, how could you NOT touch upon that?

    • Royale W. Cheese

      Lovely. Stuck in moderation for quoting the OP verbatim.

    • http://www.youtube.com/user/pervertedalchemist1?feature=mhee Perverted Alchemist

      I completely understand why Eric Benet put Lil’ Wayne on the song, but Eric should have done a little research on who he was asking to appear on a song called “Redbone Girl”. It’s like he was just asking for trouble, LOL!

      • Royale W. Cheese

        Maybe Lil Wayne has a bromantic crush on Eric. That would make sense to me.

        • http://www.youtube.com/user/pervertedalchemist1?feature=mhee Perverted Alchemist

          Wayne said when he was incarcerated, Eric Benet’s “Sometimes I Cry” was the song that helped him through that rough time. Make of that what you will…

    • https://twitter.com/#!/IluminatiNYC Todd

      I just like how Damon mentioned the social media manager part. He isn’t merely the founder and president, he’s actually beefing with people on Twitter who find dark skin girls cute. LOL

      • Tonia

        Please tell me you are joking about him arguing against dark women. Does he realize the effect this could have on his oldest daughter? He is a straight up clown.

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

      “OMG, how could you NOT touch upon that?”

      I was sleepy

  • CC

    Are u serious? Is this a phucking joke 4 real? Since when did Eric Benet- a self-proclaimed sex addict- have any credibility whatsoever? And his music career? When was the last time he had a song that went wood? Plastic? This n!gga can’t even SPELL platinum, so of course he has 2 record a “controversial” song just 2 try and stay “relevant”. Please tell the ex Mr. Halle Berry to kill himself. #yawn.

    • iamnotakata

      LMAO Co-sign!

    • http://voodoochile88.tumblr.com/ Craig and Dem

      Naww don’t tell him to kill himself just yet! Tell that n!gga I said jump off Everest, play in traffic on the 405, have every ninja in the hood get to stomp him for 2 mins, and then bring Halle in with a machete to off that disloyal, fool-azz, trick made punk!

      • Beautifullyhuman

        You must be from LA (or familiar with) talking about traffic on the 405. Did I assume correctly? LOL

        • Kandi

          OMG you and Royale W. Cheese have the most lovely avi’s

          • https://twitter.com/#!/mackaroto Jay

            +1

            • Beautifullyhuman

              Thank you Kandi & Jay.

          • That Ugly Kid

            Don’t bother. I’ve told both of them this and still…no panties. Heartbreaking…

          • b sweet

            I agree. Very cute BH

            • BeautifullyHuman

              Thanks, B Sweet!

          • Royale W. Cheese

            Aw, thanks for the avi love!

        • http://voodoochile88.tumblr.com/ Craig and Dem

          Beatilfullyhuman you got that perfectly right! Compton CA Stand Up!!!!!!!!

          • Beautifullyhuman

            I ain’t from the CPT, but I’m effin’ with you! lol *laces up crispy black & white chucks*
            :-)

            • http://voodoochile88.tumblr.com/ Craig and Dem

              *Now in love with Beautifullyhuman*

    • Kandi

      Tell ‘em why you mad son. As a proud representative of dark butts I must say enough is enough. I blame little league sports because now everyone needs a medal. Some women will not be happy until EVERYONE tells them that they (or their unique features) are irresistible. Why must we look to others for validation at every turn, even to the extent of taking praise away from deserving parties. Why can’t beige women be great.

      BTW thank God for Kegel strengthened sphinter control because I would of lost it at “The only way he wouldn’t pass a paper bag test is if the paper bags had malaria” —-

      • Beautifullyhuman

        “Why can’t beige women be great.”

        Word. Black women are beautiful in general. I’ll always give a beautiful sista her props, regardless of her complexion. Beauty is beauty. Fine is fine. And there’s a multitude of beautiful light skinned Black women out there, and many that don’t necessarily fit the multi-ethnic bill either. I see many here daily. VSBeauty.

        • https://twitter.com/#!/IluminatiNYC Todd

          Agreed. Though Beige women trigger me, so I prefer to step to few shades lighter or darker, thank you very much!

      • JessicaL

        Not only that but I get hit on when I walk outside just for being female not to mention attractive. I don’t want every dude fawning at my chocolatey goodness. Let the red,beige, and yella sistas get their shine. I gets plenty. I don’t need a song to validate me.

      • http://Www.performingderin.blogspot.com Deeezbeeez

        Amen!
        Beige chicks can be praised too without all the fanfare .
        I’m a dark skinned chick who is super anti any display of colorism based self loathing, including being mad when (some) light skinned women receive shout outs. The world has operated the way it has. No denying that, but people are made out to be messiahs for acknowledging (some) darker black women are attractive as if they’re on some new sh*t. That and folks making generalizations about how ALL darker skinned women are received make my eyes and ears bleed.
        My dark-skinned-ness hasn’t kept me from anything because I’m not waiting for my beauty to be validated by anyone. It just is what it is.
        Light skinned chicks can be hot too. Let them go ahead and enjoy their song.

      • demondog06

        ” Why must we look to others for validation at every turn, even to the extent of taking praise away from deserving parties ”

        + 10

    • bhillboy

      He has songs on the radio now. I heard a new one last week. Just because they don’t play Eric Benet on your urban/hip hop station doesn’t mean he doesn’t get burn on other formats. You all sound like some haters and I don’t toss that term around lightly.

      • http://www.youtube.com/user/pervertedalchemist1?feature=mhee Perverted Alchemist

        Exactly! Eric has been around for about 20 years- which is more than I can say for the likes of Trey Songz, Beyonce and the like.

        • http://www.facebook.com/RandGAreZombies?ref=hl The Other Jerome

          Low key, Beyonce has been around sense 1997 o_0. Crazy right!

          • http://www.youtube.com/user/pervertedalchemist1?feature=mhee Perverted Alchemist

            Fifteen years and music still hasn’t gotten any better. WTF?!

            • bhillboy

              But she keeps winning. She’s popular because she’s talented and her music is worth listening to. Women have this Beyonce envy (HATE) that’s really annoying.

            • bhillboy

              Basically, you don’t get props for not liking the SECOND best selling singer of our era. It makes you look bitter. I’m right because you didn’t mention the BEST selling singer of our era- Mariah Carey. Mariah, is lighter complected (mixed), can’t dance at all, and her music is infinitely inferior to Beyonce’s. But people pile on Beyonce and all she does is make bangers and anthems and dances at full tilt for 90 minutes each show. She’ beautiful, down to earth, cool and grounded. She collects Grammy’s and smangs the most important figure in Hip Hop. Please point to someone who you like that anyone will remember 20 years from now.

              Full disclosure- I do NOT own any Beyonce albums and she is not on my music player. My ex wife likes her so I heard her alot.

              • http://www.youtube.com/user/pervertedalchemist1?feature=mhee Perverted Alchemist

                Makes me look bitter? Try again dude. I’ve stated that I’m into artists, not performers. Beyonce’s a great performer, but there is no way in hell that she’san artists. All of the record sales and chart positions in the world does not mask the fact that her songs are forgettable, they lack substance and she does not take risks. In other words, she’s a poster child for modern day pop music- nothing more, nothing less.

                • bhillboy

                  “she’s a poster child for modern day pop music- nothing more, nothing less.” Like the Beatles? Like Diana Ross? Like Steely Dan? Like the Rolling Stones? Like Aretha Franklin? Yeah, like Artists and Groups that will be remembered over time. “Pop” music is short for Popular Music- I’m not here to tell you who to like or dislike but the fact that you’re sidestepping the whole Mariah Carey statement shows you like to debate without merit.

                  • http://www.youtube.com/user/pervertedalchemist1?feature=mhee Perverted Alchemist

                    I don’t listen to Mariah Carey either, so Im not sidestepping.
                    And for the record, Steely Dan is not a pop group and they never have been…

                    • bhillboy

                      Steely Dan is a Rock group that is Pop because everyone likes them. They are “Pop”ular-All of the artists I named are from different genres but are considered pop because of their universal appeal.

                  • http://www.youtube.com/user/pervertedalchemist1?feature=mhee Perverted Alchemist

                    Also, I do find it rather strange that you are stanning for Beyonce real hard despite your claim nof not owning anything by her. That’s like me being a fanboy for T.I. despite the fact that I loathe him and his music.

                    Then you tell me that you are not trying to tell me who to listen to but want me to respect the merits and achievements of someone who I clearly stated that I wasn’t into. Sorry, but I’m not going to listen to someone just because they have huge hit records on the charts. If that were the case, I’d still be listening to Usher right now.

                • https://twitter.com/#!/IluminatiNYC Todd

                  I see where you’re getting at PA, but it’s clear that Beyonce want to entertain more than create art. When you have ability, you can do as you wish, and Beyonce has made her choice.

                  • http://www.youtube.com/user/pervertedalchemist1?feature=mhee Perverted Alchemist

                    That’s what I’m talking about. A lot of people don’t know the difference between being a performer and being creative. Those two are mutually exclusive in the music world.

                    • http://panamaenrique.wordpress.com Malik

                      Janelle Monae easily does both.

              • http://www.shesoflyy.wordpress.com Muze

                gasp.

                i am a card carrying Bey fan and i refuse to hear this mess about Mariah’s music being “infinitely inferior”

                ……….. Mariah is the bestselling female artist because of her discography and voice. the ONLY bad music she made was during that rainbow phase, and even that was simply fun music.

                we can let Bey AND Mariah be great. at the same damn time.

                • http://www.youtube.com/user/pervertedalchemist1?feature=mhee Perverted Alchemist

                  “……….. Mariah is the bestselling female artist because of her discography and voice.”

                  Her voice, I’ll give you that. She has a spotty discography, at best.

                  ” the ONLY bad music she made was during that rainbow phase, and even that was simply fun music.”

                  The “Rainbow” phase? Try her whole career. Again, she has a spotty discography. I’ve heard a lot of her albums, so I know what I’m talking about.

                  • http://www.shesoflyy.wordpress.com Muze

                    i have too. i own them all and know allllllada words. her music is not spotty! who are you people who dislike talent? lol

                    • http://www.youtube.com/user/pervertedalchemist1?feature=mhee Perverted Alchemist

                      A person can have all of the talent in the world and still cannot make a good album to save their lives (See: Whitney Houston, Gerald Levert and any rapper that’s known for battling and/or freestyling)

                    • bhillboy

                      Dogging Whitney Houston and Gerald Levert’s Discography is NOT helping your case. Some people just think they are smarter than everybody else by Stanning for music and groups that only a couple other people in the world likes. They think it makes them look avant garde and ahead of the curve. It doesn’t it just makes them sound like they have horrible taste.

                    • http://www.youtube.com/user/pervertedalchemist1?feature=mhee Perverted Alchemist

                      @bhillboy …And once again, you’re still trying to get me to accept someone just because they sell records. Selling records doesn’t mean a hill of beans if the material isn’t there. I also am a fan of people some would consider popular. However, there is a difference between someone having good songs that happened to be pop hits and a person who sell records with mediocre and/or lackluster material. It seems as if most people who listen to music in this day and age cannot seem to make that distinction.

                    • bhillboy

                      To say Bey makes wack music is saying the millions of fans that she has are tasteless. The whole BDay album is a banger- Get me bodied, Upgrade you, Irreplaceable.Those are songs that people still love-who do you have that’s greater?

                • BeautifullyHuman

                  I like me some Mariah, but Glitter was God-awful…lol. I believe when that album came out, Mariah actually managed to snag the remarkable worst album and worst movie (as far as sales) of that particular year. But she bounced back with the “Emancipation of Mimi.”

            • legs

              again, your whole ‘i’m amazing and have great musical taste because i don’t listen to pop music’ personality is annoying. people like you are horrible. like what you like. but please don’t bring down what other people like because you think you know better.

              • http://www.youtube.com/user/pervertedalchemist1?feature=mhee Perverted Alchemist

                Two words: Kill yourself!

                • legs

                  ha ha ha. such an amazing comeback. now i know that you really are a horrible person.

                  • http://www.youtube.com/user/pervertedalchemist1?feature=mhee Perverted Alchemist

                    I’m not nearly as horrible as your parents were when they decided to let you live when they could have easily aborted you…

                    • legs

                      ha ha ha ha. you ARE horrible.

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

      “This n!gga can’t even SPELL platinum, so of course he has 2 record a “controversial” song just 2 try and stay “relevant”.

      is this song really that controversial?

      • demondog06

        no

    • veryaveragebrotha

      “Since when did Eric Benet- a self-proclaimed sex addict- have any credibility whatsoever?”

      I’m not sure how being a sex addict affects his credibility…he isn’t discussing the virtues of abstinence…

  • Iceprincess

    “I go from butter pecan to black brand molass; i dont descriminate, i regulate every shade of dat azz.” -Big Pun

    • https://twitter.com/#!/IluminatiNYC Todd

      Sounds like my dating history. :)

      • demondog06

        you heard me?
        from blue eyed and bleach blond to blue black with hair of steel wool
        fine is fine,
        lil’ dingo does not discriminate!

    • http://www.shesoflyy.wordpress.com Muze

      hahaha. that used to be my jam. why oh why.

    • Rod

      Word life. Or also: “I like em brown yellow Puerto Rican or Haitian!”

  • iamnotakata

    Black people can be really stupid sometimes….beauty is relative…so who gives a f*ck about skin color…I’m so sick of hearing about interacial issues regarding skin color and beauty…the kkk lynch dark and light skin n!ggas…

    • Rewind

      Because we never let go of the past. We have to constantly reinforce stupid shyte and then force feed it into every new generation of black kids. You can’t argue with someone’s opinion of beauty when it’s subjective yet in over 200 years of the idea of American black beauty, no one has figured that out yet.

  • http://www.iamyourpeople.com I Am Your People

    1) This song sounds very 1997
    1a) Which was probably the last time Eric Benet was semi-relevant
    2) I think they were trying to be controversial. Not taking the bait. Again, go back to the 90s, Halle Berry’s ex.

    • http://www.youtube.com/user/pervertedalchemist1?feature=mhee Perverted Alchemist

      The reason why it sounds very 1997 is that he worked with his longtime producers Demonte Posey and George Nash, Jr.- AKA the same people behind his debut album “True To Myself” as well as his other albums “Love & Life” and “Lost In Time”.

      • Beautifullyhuman

        You’re seriously a human liner note database. Lol

        • http://www.youtube.com/user/pervertedalchemist1?feature=mhee Perverted Alchemist

          I get that a lot, LMAO!!!!

      • LeonieUK

        I thought I was the only one who only brought cd’s if it had lyrics inside, but I see your part of the club…

        • http://www.youtube.com/user/pervertedalchemist1?feature=mhee Perverted Alchemist

          I’m an 80′s baby- that’s all we used to do, LOL!

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

      “1) This song sounds very 1997″

      yeah, it definitely sounded like something that should have been on the “booty call” soundtrack

  • That Ugly Kid

    I think it’s stupid because the women (and men) who are getting mad about this are ALL hypocrites. Every. Single. One. It’s called a preference. I have them. You have them. Everyone, including the people who complain about it, has a preference. Mine is dark-skinned women. The black actress that plays Tara on True Blood is my latest obsession. Nobody rages when some women say they like their men “tall, dark, and handsome.” Hell, I should be the first in line to complain as I’m neither tall nor dark. But that’s what it is. A preference.

    People don’t mind them until they find out they’re not the preference, then all of a sudden it’s “wrong, self-hatred, close-minded, etc.” Oh well. People need to grow up. You can’t get upset because everyone on the planet doesn’t acknowlege your beauty the way you think they should.

    • https://twitter.com/mcnairian5 fiveisthenumber

      Ol’ Girl from True Blood lookeded good tonight!

      • That Ugly Kid

        Bruh, you ain’t never lied. A squealed when I saw here. Squealed! N*gga, do you know how beautiful you have to be to make me squeal when I SEE you?!?!?

        • naturalista88

          Now did you squeal like a pig, or was it one of those teen girl “OHEMGEE IT’S ROBERT PATTINSON!!” kind of squeals? Inquiring minds would like to know.

          • That Ugly Kid

            The teen girl squeal. In my defense though, it was a manly…teen girl squeal.

            • naturalista88

              Mmhmm, sure it was =-T

        • Rewind

          I’m not going to lie, I never found her to be that attractive….until I saw the weave & the abs last night. Praise Lilith.

          • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

            “I never found her to be that attractive….until I saw the weave & the abs”

            i dont think anyone has ever said this sentence before, like ever

            • Rewind

              Then it truly is the first of its kind.

            • Justmetheguy

              +1 Champ- I had a perplexed look on my face. Like the visual was delayed in my mind as I tried to accurately portray that odd combination to myself

      • https://twitter.com/#!/mackaroto Jay

        Working the pole… in the leather joint. Yeah, Tara was in rare form tonight.

        • demondog06

          okay imabout to google this true blood chick i need to see what the fuss is about.

          • demondog06

            ok i’m back….she’s not bad

            • mena

              LOL…it’s her whole demeanor. She is very pretty…though i am a girl. And pretty much every woman on that show has a sick body. Does anyone remember when Pam was hanging from the chains? Her six pack was not to be played with. I think that Pam, then Sam’s girlfriend, then Tara are the hottest women on the show.

              Don’t get me wrong, Pam is staring to look a tad old but her entire attitude screams “b!tches, fall back!! The head b!tch in charge is here!”

              • demondog06

                aaaand i have no idea what you’re talking about…

                • mena

                  Google, demondog, GOOGLE!!! :-)

              • https://twitter.com/#!/mackaroto Jay

                Jessica… ALL DAY EVERY DAY NO QUESTION.

    • http://www.youtube.com/user/pervertedalchemist1?feature=mhee Perverted Alchemist

      “People don’t mind them until they find out they’re not the preference, then all of a sudden it’s “wrong, self-hatred, close-minded, etc.” Oh well. People need to grow up. You can’t get upset because everyone on the planet doesn’t acknowlege your beauty the way you think they should.”

      Either this is an “interesting point” or a “shots fired”…which one is it, That Ugly Kid? LMAO!!

      • That Ugly Kid

        I would classify it as honesty. Because the people complaining about it are mad that he’s not complimenting a dark-skinned girl. Which upsets me.

        You can’t get mad because everyone doesn’t think you’re beautiful. People have preferences. As I said, I think dark-skinned women are f*cking gorgeous. But I don’t cry a river everytime a woman says she likes her men “tall, dark, and handsome.” I’m 5’8″, light-skinned, and my handle is That Ugly Kid….I should be committing genocide every time a woman says this. But I don’t. Because I know that there are women out there who DO appreciate me. And that’s fine with the Kid.

        • PurpleView

          Kid, you possess the most attractive feature ever–confidence.

          • That Ugly Kid

            Well thank you dahling!

    • JessicaL

      For some reason she just looks hotter this season.

    • Rewind

      Maybe you been through this before. Ever had a girl straight curse you out for not find her attractive, because she’s not your preference? I can’t count how many dark skinned women have tried to make me feel like shyte because I always liked lighter toned women. To me, it was just obvious: the dark women around me were ugly. Not because they were dark, THEY WERE JUST FAWKING UGLY. Fast forward years later and those same females are still fighting the same pointless battle. You can’t argue someone’s preference no more than you can argue down a volcano for exploding with hot lava.

      • That Ugly Kid

        Yea see me, I’m attracted to ALL shades. I don’t care about race or color. Beautiful is beautiful. Though, as I’ve admitted before, I have a thing for brown and dark-skinned women.

        • Rewind

          And I’m the same, but I’ve found most of the women I’ve been with have either been white or light-toned women, but beautiful is beautiful regardless. People should just know not to tell another person who they should be attracted to.

          • meeeeeeeeee

            the problem with all you kneegroes, no matter how you try to sugar coat it, is that the truth is that too many Black people in the music industry have made their money off of insulting Black women – particularly those that are not light skinned (although not necessarily dark skinned). Too many people in American culture have made it clear that they will do their best to degrade women who are darker skinned – Black men have joined in that culture of hate, no matter how you try to pretend that it’s just innocent preference.

            The self-hatred in Black men for darker skin is evident to all – sure some of you will give a condescending shout out about dark skinned women being beautiful, but your own actions prove that you are liars. For example, Black men making mockery of Black women (martin, dressing up in fat suits, etc) are never made to be light skinned women, but dark skinned; the majority of music videos, in the genre that Black people are drawn to, routinely preference light skinned (and now white) over brown and dark skinned Black women; black sports star have almost made an industry of showing their hatred for Black women , particularly those who are darker, for lighter, whiter, and white women. Stop the gaslighting. Since we are Black, the things we see happening among other of our own people affect us, so yes, we are bothered by the obvious colorism and skin tone hatred rampant among our men.

            YES, dark skinned and llight skinned women ARE beautiful, and their beauty doesn’t change just because society and the Black community tells them so – however, when you regularly see where Black men will proclaim that most of the dark skinned girls just “happened” to be ugly, and all the light skinned and white girls just “happened ” to be beautiful, there is something that rings very false about that. Face it – Black people have chosen to accept the colorism and colonial propaganda of power and beauty that was ** violently ** enforced throughout America for hundreds of years.

            The negatives routinely parroted out about Black women has effects – Ciara, a beautiful woman has been routinely trashed in the media as being “ugly” or “man-looking”, none of which is true at all – but of course, who are the first to pick up the media trash and run with it? Black people. All kinds of ugly white women and lighter women are constantly called beautiful no matter how ugly (like Charity Shea, the chick from Single Ladies or Sarah Jessica Parker, Glen Close, and the plasticized face of km Kardashian) but we’ve decided that their ugly is still beautiful no matter what. And our beautiful is ugly no matter what.

            Face it black men, you’re colorstruck and black people in general are colorstruck. Since you all are so understanding and want to rationalize the brainwashing of black Americans, then none of yall should be ridiculing dark skinned people of other cultures who preference light as right – Sammy Sosa is no different than any of you, except that he was brave enough to use the bleach on himself. Black men of U..S descent do the same thing just through colorism against women. Sorry, but self hate is a b*tch and all this article is doing is trying to rationalize that internalized self hate.

            However, I do agree that Black women should stop feeling obligated to point out “chocolate” brothers that are supposedly beautiful. If I have to hear one more time about “How fine” ugly ass Idris Elba is, I’ll vomit. Obligation is not required for people who do not reciprocate. Boris Kudjoe and The Rock on the other hand? Light skinned, and yes, fine.

  • Iceprincess

    So lil wayne supposedly doesnt like darker skin girls? Wtf? Toya aint light, & neither is Shanell, that YM artist he was f*ckin. Most of all i hope thats not true, for Reginaes sake…

    • AfroPetite

      He already said Reginae being dark is irrelevant because she is “rich”

      • http://www.twitter.com/think2inspire Think2Inspire

        This is why we can’t let The Reptile procreate any longer.

        • Rewind

          He got 5 in already. It’s too late. The invasion has begun.

    • http://www.youtube.com/user/pervertedalchemist1?feature=mhee Perverted Alchemist

      “So lil wayne supposedly doesnt like darker skin girls? Wtf? Toya aint light, & neither is Shanell, that YM artist he was f*ckin.”

      Ever notice those same guys who say they prefer light skinned girls are the same ones who are porking women who aren’t…uh…melanin challenged?

      • Rewind

        Just like dudes who say they only smash bad bytches but then be having 1′s & 2′s as baby mamas & exes like they are DJs or something.

        • http://www.youtube.com/user/pervertedalchemist1?feature=mhee Perverted Alchemist

          Sometimes those happen to be the same exact dudes, LMAO!

          • Rewind

            That’s why you can’t do anything but laugh at those frauds, but you right tho.