Dating, Relationships, & Sex, Race & Politics, Theory & Essay

When A Black Man Breaks Up With His Barber

barberrich

Allen Iverson often gets credit for making both cornrows and visible tattoos more, for lack of a better term, “mainstream.” But, although this isn’t brought up as much, he’s also somewhat responsible for what’s been the single most popular hairstyle for African-American men over the past two decades: The Caesar. He had one as a freshman at Georgetown, and he was so popular that it convinced thousands of young Black kids to eschew the fades, tapers, and cornrows that sat on our heads. I was one of those kids. This was 1995. And I’ve had the same haircut since.

Now, there have been some variations. I used to line up the back, and now I fade it out. I also went from sideburns, to the point thing, to the faint beard line when I could finally connect my beard, to the (somewhat) full beard I have now. And the actual amount of hair on my head has varied. But, the basic template — an even cut all around — has remained the same.

Despite the Caesar’s simplicity, its maintenance requires effort. It needs to be brushed a couple times a day, it needs to be shampooed at least twice a week, and you need to have a barber who knows what the f*ck he (or she) is doing. The last point is the most crucial. A Caesar with a jacked-up line-up is a perpetual practical joke, a public gong show where the only prize is dry vageen and you have to stay on stage until enough time has passed (usually between 10 and 14 days) for your hair to grow back enough for someone to fix it.

But a fresh Caesar with a perfect line? Man!!! That’s the shit dreams are made of. Seriously, every Caesar-ed man reading this can probably name the five best haircuts they’ve ever had — when the shape-up and the beard and the fade in the back and the sheen of your scalp all aligned perfectly. And each of those men can probably also give you the names of the five or six women whose numbers they got the week of the perfect shape-up because, even if you look like the construction workers from Fraggle Rock, the perfect shape-up will have you feeling and acting like an Idris/Leonidas hybrid.

And this is why a good barber is the best friend any Black man can have. It’s also why you do what you can to hold on to one. I’ve had the same one for 12 years now.

And this is also why I’m probably going to break up with him.

As you can imagine, the decision to break up with my barber hasn’t been an easy one. I’ve read before that it takes a fourth of the time you’ve been with someone to break up with them. (Basically, If you’ve been with someone two years, it takes six months. Three to convince yourself breaking up is the right decision, and three more to gather the courage to do it.) If this is true, I’ve been breaking up with my barber for three years now. Seems like a long time, but it sounds about right.

He’s not a bad barber. The relationship wouldn’t have lasted this long if he wasn’t. And, when he’s focused on cutting my hair, he’s actually good. The problem is that those moments of focus are occurring less and less often. He takes breaks to text. And to check the messages on the dozens of dating sites he belongs too. And to show me pictures of the women he’s dating. And to talk to me about the NBA draft. And to run across the street to play the lottery. And to run to the corner store for a Cherokee Red. And to run to his car to make sure the windows are closed.

I wouldn’t mind any of this if he was still able to make my line even — well, I wouldn’t mind it that much — but the more distracted he gets, the worse my haircut is going to be.

Also, I’ve traveled quite a bit for panels, conferences, festivals, and parties over the last few years. Sometimes, this travel will be last minute, my barber won’t be available, and I’ll have to go to someone else in the shop. And sometimes I’ll just wait to get a haircut in the city of the event. And, when this happens, my haircuts are always better. Always. 90% of my Leonidas Elba weeks since 2010 have been because of “new” barbers.

So why is it so difficult to get a new barber? If he’s not providing a service I’m paying him for, why not just pay someone who will? Well, it’s not that easy. As I mentioned before, I’ve known him for over a decade, which makes this one of the longest relationships I’ve ever been in. Aside from family, there are only maybe 10 people who’ve been as consistent in my life in that time period as he has. We’ve seen the neighborhood change together. We’ve changed too. Both personally and aesthetically. I’ve been there long enough to see an entirely new group of barbers man the chairs beside him. I also remember his “old” shop — a raggedy storefront on an off-brand corner — and I remember how he got the money together to move to the much, much nicer location he’s in now. I look forward to going there, and talking shit with him and the other barbers about the Steelers or sneakers or strippers or credit scores or whatever the hell else happens to be the topic of conversation that day. And I know he looks forward to my visits too. He’s not my best friend. But he is my friend.

There’s a shop I pass a couple times a week in route to my barbershop. I started paying attention to it last summer after a guy randomly complimented my cut, gave me his business card, and told me he works at the new shop on Baum Blvd. I actually think it’s owned by one of the Steelers.

Since then, I’ve become increasingly tempted to take him up on his offer. But I haven’t. At least not yet.

What’s stopping me? Two things:

1. An irrational fear that my barber will see me walking out of the new barbershop shop, and having to deal with that awkward moment.

2. Who gave me the extra-sharp line up that compelled that guy to compliment me? My barber.

—Damon Young (aka “The Champ”)

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Damon Young

Damon Young is the editor-in-chief of VSB. He is also a contributing editor for EBONY.com. He resides in Pittsburgh, and he really likes pancakes.

  • JayIzUrGod

    I feel your pain Champ. I broke up with mines 5 months ago. He was great, always the most popular barber. I liked him because he knew how to cut around my keloids, and to a Black man with a messed up head, that sh it was CRUCIAL. But…he’s lazy. Always on the phone, always talking to somebody, taking 20 minute breaks in between people, will have you waiting for a long time due to all his customers..etc. I couldn’t do it anymore. Hence I have a 5 month afro now. Because I’m not using anyone else til I get sick of this thing.

    • Jay

      It’s like that EVERYWHERE. When choosing a new barber there is SERIOUS pre-selection going on… everyone wants the popular barber, I mean obviously there is a reason that 10 dudes are willing to wait an hour for a cut while less popular barbers stand by with empty chairs. When you walk into a shop there’s always the aggressive barber reeking of desperation like “What you need my man”.

      And the good barbers are always doing a million things because they’re spoiled. They know that you need them almost as much as they need you or you wouldn’t be there every other week.

      • http://www.twitter.com/IluminatiNYC Todd

        Word. The worse thing is when you go into a barber shop where half the chairs are empty, but the place is packed because everyone is waiting for the same 3-4 barbers. It’s like walking into a shark pit. LOL

        • http://stanoffewwords.wordpress.com/ Tristan

          Its so awkward when you walk in and you gotta tell a barber, Nah, I’m waiting for dude over here

          • Epsilonicus

            The most awkward is your first time at a shop and you don’t know which one to choose.

      • JayIzUrGod

        And that’s why I’m considering giving the thirsty barber a shot. It’s clear you can’t get the skills unless you practice and in truth, I don’t really care about my appearance at the moment as much as I should, so I can deal with a zeeked up hairline for a moment.

    • Yoles

      is it my age showing????…. every guy i’ve dated seriously except cut their own hair… they started out in barber shops as kids/pre teens and by 16/17 years old they were doing their own hair.. the men in my family as well.. is this something that is only for the early 70s people and went the way of the dodo bird?

      • kidvideo

        I cut my on hair…save dem ten dollars.

        • http://stanoffewwords.wordpress.com/ Tristan

          More like 20….inflation is real out here

          • Sigma_Since 93

            $20??? Where you going? Haircuts were close to $20 back in NY when I was in college.

            • Shamira

              Haircut prices at the black spots ain’t never changed…like glasses and abortions

              • IcePrincess

                Rite they’ve always been $400 long as I can remember ;)

                • Boo Radley

                  corner

                  • IcePrincess

                    Alright alright. *heads to the corner till the next post*

          • Kema

            Around my way its 10 for kids 12 for adults. But of course you gotta tip.

            • http://stanoffewwords.wordpress.com/ Tristan

              Idk how much it costs its usually at least 15 , I just give a $20 and have no idea if I’m tipping

          • http://brown-c6h12o6.tumblr.com/ AfroPetite

            I wonder if the cost of my sew-ins equal out to y’all getting cut every other week.

      • Geneva Girl

        My husband cuts his own hair and I don’t like it. He hates waiting in line and dealing with the entire barbershop thing. That and he’s cheap. There are indeed black barbers in Switzerland, but no amount of begging can get him to go again. He once went to a Jamaican guy here who could cut hair but the shop is so crowded and nasty that he didn’t want to go back.

        • http://www.twitter.com/IluminatiNYC Todd

          Keeping it real, I’d get real nervous about a Black barber someplace in Switzerland. Trust me…every 6 weeks, I’d either head for France or by some base town in Germany if I were him. LOL

          • Geneva Girl

            LOL!! I can’t even get him to go to a Jamaican here in town and hubby’s Jamaican. What makes you think he’s going to get in his car and drive six hours to go to the military base in Germany. That said, I knew a sister who would fly to Amsterdam every few months to get her locks tended too. We don’t have that kind of money! (BTW, there are several black salons for women. I wouldn’t go to them. A girlfriend goes to one where she will not use their bathroom! I take my wash and wear hair and to a Brazilian to do it.)

            • afronica

              My cousin here in the DMV does hair for a living and is good at it, too. If you throw a rock around here, you will hit a hair salon. But when she needs a touch up, really wants her hair to look good or is ready for a change your look cut, she goes to NYC. She just doesn’t think the salons here are good enough. I called her saddity. She just shrugged.

              • Epsilonicus

                Thats too much to go all the way to NYC for your hair done.

                • afronica

                  She said NYC shops were cheaper (truuuue) and better (arguable).

                  • Epsilonicus

                    Cheaper? It aint cheaper when you consider time and travel costs lol

        • Charlie

          I feel your pain. My husband will shave his entire head bald just to save time and money.

          One day he suprised me with a fresh cut that one of his shipmates who’s in barber school did (for the free). Magically his face looked clearer, teeth looked whiter, and walk was smoother.

          • Kozy

            If this isn’t an endorsement for quality barber work, I don’t know what is.

            • ratchet d-Ibaka

              Oh okay! So you trying to get chose today huh?! Showing out in a tight shirt. Mmmkay, Mena is you not seeing this?

        • Yoles

          why don’t you like it? is it because he still doesn’t really do a good job? the men i spoke about above cut their own hair… high tops and fades and sharp hairlines, parts, custom designs all that.. they CUT their own hair not just save money… once a week (or more depending on the guy) in the mirror with clippers and various guards, the lights on and a hand mirror… i thought it was the norm

      • http://stanoffewwords.wordpress.com/ Tristan

        A lot of dudes self cut, I have clippers in case of an emergency but I rather just go to the barbershop

      • JayIzUrGod

        I do not know anyone that knows how to cut their own hair, most people just go to someone they trust, but if I could do it, trust me there’d be no stopping me

        • http://trulytafakari.com/ dtafakari

          I grew up seeing my dad cut his own hair into a baldy and he cut my brother’s hair, too. I’ve never seen him go to a barbershop. The whole culture and relationship thing was new to me until I met my husband, who briefly had a Caesar til he grew his locs back.

      • http://tripsixes.com/about/ Trip

        Been cutting my own for many years now- nothing tricky, just a baldy. With practice, it’s pretty painless. I know I’ve saved a small fortune that way but I’ve missed out on the barbershop culture.

      • SuperStrings

        I’ve been cutting my own hair for the last 10 years. I do have a barber I hit up for times when I need that extra special cut though.

      • ForeverCC

        my husband shaves his head. he does go to the barber shop every blue moon to get his beard shaped…he does it himself usually but i guess that’s kinda like when i go get a facial. i don’t ask! lol

      • Joel

        I’ve been cutting my own hair since I was 13. My folks didn’t want to pony up barbershop money and I got tired of the jokes that came from getting the “Timmy” cut all the time. If it was a special occasion—i.e., prom, first day at Howard (lol), reporting to a new duty station back when I was in the military….then I’d go to the barber shop.

        • SuperStrings

          Not the Timmy. lol I haven’t heard that in a grip. Next thing you’re gonna say is “skwo? skwo bidness.” and then start jittin’.

      • Epsilonicus

        I dont cut my hair bc since my brother is barber I get free cuts.

    • Heavens2Murgatroid

      I had to go through that ordeal too. Due to me moving around so much, I got used to cutting my own hair. Yea, I sacrifice on not having the freshest line-up, but since I have that “good hair” it evens out

  • Lurker

    So I’m a single mother right. I have an almost 3 year old son. I take him to barbers to get his hair cut, but he doesn’t have his own barber. At what age should a boy have his own barber? What should I look for in this barber? How much do I tip him? Should I just learn to cut his hair until he is old enough to pick his own barber? These are all real questions by the way. I had no idea how much effort I’d have to put into his hair. He’s my only son, so I’m learning as I go with him. Anyway someone please help me out. Thanks!

    • Sahel

      6 because at that age the wrong hair cut can mean nick names for life

    • Jay

      Its never too early. It’s easier for you, him, and the barber if you find one good guy and stick with him. Look for someone that cuts the way you like his head to look. Then look for a guy who is good with kids and who your kid actually likes. This is what I’ve done with my son since he was 4. He and his barber had a good relationship. Dude would make him laugh and he liked my son because he wasn’t a problem like other 4 year olds can be when they’re in the chair.

    • http://stanoffewwords.wordpress.com/ Tristan

      I love that the name is Lurker Lol…its never too early to find a barber, you tip about 2-3 dollars, NEVER CUT HIS HAIR YOURSELF, kids are simpler, you get a low Caesar or a fade and try and get him lineups twice a month

      • http://trulytafakari.com/ dtafakari

        “NEVER CUT HIS HAIR YOURSELF”

        lol, why not? (I think I know, but I’d like to hear your reason)

        and I’ll add to this that when my dad was deployed, my mom cut my brother’s hair (don’t know why she didn’t take him to a barbershop) and put patches all over his head. my dad was verklempt. lol. After that, she took him to the base barber.

        • Sigma_Since 93

          “put patches all over his head. my dad was verklempt”

          You know the answer. Don’t make be get on my back and fight you! LOL

          • http://trulytafakari.com/ dtafakari

            LOL. I know, I know. She should’ve never came around my brother’s head with them clippers. :)

            • Sigma_Since 93

              Your brother’s just lucky he didn’t inherit the nickname patches.

              • http://trulytafakari.com/ dtafakari

                he was too young, he was like 2 or 3. Not old enough for the patches to stick lol. Plus, military families move too often for lifetime nicknames. Moving = fresh start

    • Sigma_Since 93

      The earlier you start the better. A barber with patience especially when he’s trimming around the ears because the buzzing sound makes some kids squirm. Look at the results of the other kids cuts and how the kid responded to the barber.

    • Freebird

      sigma is right. find a good patient one early.

    • IcePrincess

      I was just telling jay this above! My son is 5. Been getting haircuts since he was 1. Girl I been trying to find him a barber ever since, & it’s hard! But just speak up, don’t be afraid to tell um what u want, or if it’s not quite right, or whatever. Sh*t cost too much to leave not satisfied.

    • ForeverCC

      when i took my son to get his hair cut at 1 or 2, i would get it cut VERY low and even all around. that way i didn’t have to take him back for about a month before it started looking bad lol he HATED the sound of the clippers and i couldn’t stand to see him cry like he would. he’s good now (he’s 4yo) and asks to get his hair cut

  • sweetbee

    All I can say to this post is…Aww! I’ve got mostly males (that could explain my aggressiveness) in my life, so this for some reason really touched me. Can any VSB’s recall their first time in the barber’s chair? I freak out when I see little boys getting their hair cut for the first time because they’re usually freaking out. Just too cute…

    • http://stanoffewwords.wordpress.com/ Tristan

      I was probably like 8 when i started going by myself, I had braids as a baby and then my pops used to do it until then

    • The Champ

      my dad loves to tell the story about how i cried so much that the barber told him not to bring me back

  • http://vagabondaesthetics.tumblr.com/ Ricky

    All future basketball posts should start with extolling the virtues and triumphs of Allen Iverson Champ. Outside of a brief time in GA, I’ve never had my own barber due to a combination of frequently moving and me constantly toying with the notion of growing out my hair (and several times I actually did). You know what’s really awkward? When your boy decides he wants to become a barber and constantly asks you to let him practice on your head and then when he wants to be YOUR barber. Can kill friendships man.

    • Jay

      Met A.I. at a hotel last month. He asked me to take a cell phone pic of him and some dude. I remember hearing that he was broke but he was in a black Maybach. Wanted to let him know that he is the #1 reason that I love and watch college and NBA ball, and that I was such a fan that I bought the Questions and Answers the day they came out, and that I’ve probably watched the infamous Jordan crossover highlight at least 500 times (no exaggeration) but y’know…pride. I just took the pic and said “you’re welcome”.

      • IcePrincess

        Yea, I just can’t bring myself to be star struck either. I could never “fan out” even if I wanted to. Every time i be around famous people I just keep it moving. Idgaf WHO it is

        • http://brown-c6h12o6.tumblr.com/ AfroPetite

          I was the ultimate fan girl when I met Lance Gross. I. Did. Not. Care.

  • Jay

    I’ve probably had a caesar for 72% of my natural life because its simple. I could do it my self (shout out the #1 blade), go to a barber for a lineup, and it was an easy way to show off 360 waves. I have yet to find a new barber since I moved back to Atlanta about 3 months ago. I’ve tested the waters and gotten some mediocre cuts but I don’t want to settle just yet.

    I wish I could have taken my old barber with me. My homeboy referred me to him after I let the locs go and “cropped to a caesar” to quote the great poet Memphis Bleek. I wanted something new and went with the cut I have in my avi. I actually took that pic immediately after leaving the barber shop so that I could see my whole head and how well he had actually done. The next week was a very fruitful “Leonidas Elba” one for me. I came back next time and complimented him on the last cut. He was like “Oh yeah, you got some compliments from it” to which I smirked and replied “um… I got more than that.” We were cool from then on. When he mysteriously disappeared for 3 weeks and the shop owner refused to divulge where he was and when he’d be back I had to go to another barber which only made me appreciate dude more, even with his constant smoke breaks, and calls to his bookie, and visits from his girl, and waiting through the 6 heads ahead of me. When he came back I gave him what was probably the most meaningful and heartfelt dap of my life. It really is an important relationship aaaand now I gotta start over… damn.

    • http://trulytafakari.com/ dtafakari

      ohhh, I see you just slipped in the ‘back in the A’ comment. :) I remember you said you were. Welcome back!

      • Jay

        Thank you! Send me an invite on IG to one of your spoken word events. I used to hit Apache and occasionally Java Monkey in Downtown Decatur. A friend of mine used to perform at open mic nights. I’m out of the loop now.

    • IcePrincess

      I feel your pain jay! The barber struggle in this town is real. Especially on the north side, even downtown for that matter. Been searching for someone worthy of being my sons regular barber for the last 4 years smh. With the price of cuts being high af, nah, bruh. You ain’t finna half-azz it. Idk if it’s because I’m a white woman that they think they can play me or what. But that mostly happens at the bougie shops in buckhead. The best cuts he’s had have always been from barbers on the east side, line be crispy af lol. So I suggest u try there, if it’s not too far from u.

      • TheVilleintheA

        Try barber shops in the West End or Southwest Atlanta. Castleberry is worth checking out too.

        • SuperStrings

          I used to go to the West End to get my cuts WAY back in the day. Reason I stopped going is because of the drive and because I could never seem to keep a barber. They were there this week, gone the next.

          • IcePrincess

            Right. That’s what I was bout to tell him. Hood barbers are usually good, but I’m all the way on the north side. But hey, I mite actually make the trip, it’s only twice a month after all.

      • SuperStrings

        I’ve been cutting my own hair for several years, but every now and then I’ll stop in this little hole in the wall in Sandy Springs. He’s right on Roswell Rd, been there for probably 15 years, does a good job. His spot is small, and he’s crazy busy on the weekends. Maybe try it out.

        • IcePrincess

          Oh yea? where at on Roswell?

          • SuperStrings

            On Roswell, right past Abernathy.

          • SuperStrings

            It’s called Who’s Next. Dakoro is the name of the barber.

            • IcePrincess

              Lol that’s a cute name for a barber shop. Preciate it!

      • 321mena123

        You melt my heart.

        • IcePrincess

          Lol. Back atcha!

      • Jay

        I currently live on the east side and the most passable cut I’ve had so far has been from a dude in Decatur. I’ll probably stick with him until I find better. Rocking the baldy right now.

    • SuperStrings

      Welcome back to The A, bruh. I think the Atlanta VSB’s/VSS’s need to squad up at some point.

      • http://trulytafakari.com/ dtafakari

        true, especially since I might be out of here by year’s end.

        • SuperStrings

          Definitely for that reason. Can’t let you leave without the proper send-off.

        • Lea Thrace

          I do not approve this change. Urgh.

          • http://trulytafakari.com/ dtafakari

            likely story! would you come out of hiding for a VSB meetup? lol

            • Lea Thrace

              I actually would come out for a VSB meetup. But I knowing me, I would lurk in the corner all awkwardly, like I tend to do here. Life imitates art and all that. LOL!

              • afronica

                Your lurkdom ended some time ago. You are now in the bosom of the chuch.

              • Sahel

                Avi up

                • Lea Thrace

                  I will when you do…

      • Sandpaper

        I just might come out for that.

        • SuperStrings

          Looks like there’s a sizable Atl contingent. We should make it happen. *looks around for @Alyson_P:disqus *

          • Aly

            Let’s do it!

            • SuperStrings

              I’m down. Time and place.

              • Aly

                Not sure of a place (definitely should include some alcohol this time though lol). What about this weekend or next? Let’s get some input from the others though.

                • SuperStrings

                  Role call to all Atlanta VSS’s/VSB’s. Please raise your e-hand and come forward so you can be counted.

                  • Sahel

                    Hmm,if Aly will give a hand i will join in

                  • Guest

                    I’ve been reading for YEARS, but I never comment. Is this an open invite for Atlanta lurkers too? ;)

                • Jay

                  I can think of a few good spots. It should probably be in or around downtown (midtown, midtown west, east atlanta, va highlands, cabbagetown, downtown decatur, buckhead)just so its central to everyone. How about Six Feet Under? I haven’t been in years but its a laid back seafood joint and they used to have THE best burger in Atlanta…

                  • Jay

                    Oh, and the one in midtown has a patio with a second bar on the roof with a dope view of the city…

                  • b sweet

                    I might have to drive down for that. Or fly if I can get a cheap flight.

                    • Aly

                      Are you for real b? I would love to meet you in person! Don’t play with my emotions…

                    • b sweet

                      I would love to meet you too! I had you and Jay in mind when I made the comment.
                      I’m half joking, half serious. You know me, it’s all about timing.

                  • Aly

                    Mmm, burger. Ok, cool. Doing some planning now, I’ll let you guys know once everything is set.

                  • SuperStrings

                    The Six Feet Under in Midtown is good. Loca Luna in Buckhead is usually a win too, plus they usually have live music.

      • Jay

        Appreciate it. Of course I’m down where ever/whenever.

    • ratchet d-Ibaka

      Well he sho did a good job because I can see your jawline is very well defined as a result of the cut. You so foine boy.

      “I got my eyes on you, you are everything that I need….”

      • Sigma_Since 93

        Jay,

        Mami’s going all Fleece Johnson on you…..

        • Jay

          lol… Fleece Johnson mixed with Aubrey Graham= the stuff of nightmares.

          • ratchet d-Ibaka

            Oh wow! Like really Jay?! Mschewwww!!

            • Jay

              No offense to you AM. Blame Sigma for the Booty Warrior reference.

  • JayLRich

    Hello, long time lurker here…

    This post resonates with me. In 2010 (when I had hair), I had to break up with my barber of 7 years. I grew increasingly frustrated with him messing up my line, canceling appointments, and the crappy attitude of the other barbers in the shop. One spring evening I walked in for a cut. He let me know he wasn’t going to be able to cut my hair and to come back. I said ok and never went back. Not only did I find a good barber 2 weeks later but I have a coveted Thursday 6:30pm time slot every week.

    It’s a #Firstworld problem but the six months leading up to me leaving was semi-stressful. I kept saying to myself “where am I going to find a good barber at.”

    • http://trulytafakari.com/ dtafakari

      welcome and all that jazz!

    • The Champ

      welcome and sh*t, man

  • NomadaNare

    Erm… Uh…

    Is there such thing as a barber for a man with textured hair? I haven’t gotten a haircut since I was about 18. My hair naturally grooms itself as long as I keep it moisturized, wash and condition a couple of times every week, and run a pick through it once every month to remove dead hair and protect against knots. It’s stayed the same length, I spend less on shampoo and moisturizer than I would on a barber, and I get a lot of compliments on its soft and springy texture. *shrug* humblebrag You gotta do what looks good for you, but quick question: as a man have you grown out your hair? How did it look? Ladies, do you prefer men with longer or shorter hair?

    Edit: Oh yeah, forgot to mention: I’m in New York this week. What is there to do around here? Are there any spots that any of my VSBs or VSSs could recommend?

    • 321mena123

      Black men: very low haircut, bald, or well kept dreads. White guys: shaggy cut or if it is neat then they need to have facial hair. Hispanic: fade.

      All three need facial hair. Not a mustache. Actual facial hair with either scruff or well kept beard.

    • afronica

      The guys I’ve dated have either had a Caesar or were bald (and handled their hair themselves). But I’ve seen guys with fro’s and dreads who were quite attractive. I think what I find attractive is someone who looks cared for, someone who takes the time to make sure his hair is doing whatever it’s supposed to do and that he’s well moisturized and nicely groomed. A well-done beard on a guy is a wonderful thing.

  • http://vagabondaesthetics.tumblr.com/ Ricky

    I don’t think I’ll ever really bothered to get my own barber unless I become famous. I think my head is shaped where even an average barber can make me look good.

    • http://brown-c6h12o6.tumblr.com/ AfroPetite

      You’re just too pretty for your own good……

  • Geneva Girl

    It’s tough when the lackadaisical barber owns the shop. You can’t speak to the owner to get him to stop taking calls when he’s cutting hair. Maybe you need to have a talk with him and explain why you’re leaving. He may not realize why customers are not coming back until he’s about to lose his business. An honest conversation may turn him around. I know that it will be hard, but he needs to hear it.

    • http://stanoffewwords.wordpress.com/ Tristan

      Its about 50/50 on clients who just want a cut and those there for the shenanigans, that’s why its tricky

  • Mr. SD

    Broke up with my barber last week! Best decision I’ve made all year.

    • http://brown-c6h12o6.tumblr.com/ AfroPetite

      Congratulations!

    • The Champ

      my condolences.

    • Freebird

      you dont need that heffa anyway.