Dating, Relationships, & Sex, Lists, Pop Culture

you can do better: the most unrealistic black film couples ever

floridaandjamesevans

after watching a mini-marathon on tvone the other day, i’ve come to realize that my complete underwhelmedness with “good times” has nothing to do with the (lack of) comedy, the ubiquitous corduroy pantsuits or even the perpetually dispiriting story lines and everything to do with two people: florida and james evans

you see, a show is only as good as its main characters, and its hard to believe in a show that bases itself on its “realness” when the relationship between the heads of the household is as believable as drew peterson

i mean, forget about the fact that they were as compatible as bathtub water and live toasters. also, lets overlook the fact that florida evans was more asexual than a box of brillo pads, making the thought of her having enough sex to have three children more unrealistic than shay_d_lady’s life.

no, lets instead focus on the fact that john amos was 35 years old when the series began...and esther rolle was 53!!!! fifty f*cking three???

considering that 18 years in cabrini-green could conceivably be two generations, james was getting that good backroom gotdamn from someone who could have been his f*cking grandmother. no wonder he couldn’t keep a job for longer than eight days. epson seasoned project coochie on the reg does that to you

anyway, thinking about this unadulterated romantic mismatch made me think of a few other extremely unrealistic couples i’ve seen on screen.

andre romulus ellis and reese marie wiggam ellis, “brown sugar”

2002_brown_sugar_005

she’s 6’2 without heels. he’s 5’2 with them. case closed

omar and perfunctory light-brown skinned bottom pretty boy criminal, “the wire”

ep48_omar_plusone

seriously, how the hell did omar find these dudes? did he meet them all at the same club? were they all from the same family? did he put ads on craigslist for “perpetually sweaty, homeless, and murderous gay stick-up kid with multiple bounties on head seeks light-skinned homo thug willing to stick-up and get stuck“? somebody please explain this to me.

thelma frye and reverend reuben gregory, “amen”

of all the aggressively effeminate male/shrewish female late 80’s black sitcom pairings (the winslows from “family matters”, the banks from the “fresh prince of bel-air”, etc), these two were the least convincing. i mean, you know the chemistry is bad when you think the reverend and sherman hemsley…

amendavishemsley

…would have made a better couple.

thats it for me. people of vsb.com, did i forget anyone?

—the champ

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Damon Young

Damon Young is the editor-in-chief of VSB. He is also a contributing editor for EBONY.com. He resides in Pittsburgh, and he really likes pancakes.

  • http://stickwithyocat.blogspot.com/ iloVEGrits

    Winifred “Freddie” Brooks and Ron Johnson
    When “A Different World” got this couple together they just went too far. No way was the socially conscious hippie chick going for the short dude from Detroit who always had a scheme.

    BTW, what the hell is caprini green? I think ya meant Cabrini. :) No need to thank me.

    And Nicole Ari Parker (Reese) wasn’t that much taller than Taye (Dre)!

    • http://www.awesomelyluvvie.com Luvvie

      @iloVEGrits,

      Anyone who isn’t 14 & Taye Diggs is side-eye worthy. I’m prolly one of 2 Black women who doesn’t think Taye is fine. He looks pre-pubescent. I imagine freaking him (or Bow Wow) to feel like Pedophilia.

      No thanks

      • PrincesMo

        @Luvvie,
        I don’t think he’s cute either, no ma’am i will take a pass on that one!

      • PrincesMo

        @Luvvie,
        I don’t think he’s cute either, no ma’am i will take a pass on that one!

    • http://www.awesomelyluvvie.com Luvvie

      @iloVEGrits,

      Anyone who isn’t 14 & Taye Diggs is side-eye worthy. I’m prolly one of 2 Black women who doesn’t think Taye is fine. He looks pre-pubescent. I imagine freaking him (or Bow Wow) to feel like Pedophilia.

      No thanks

    • shay_d_lady

      @iloVEGrits, No way was the socially conscious hippie chick going for the short dude from Detroit who always had a scheme.

      i dont know VEG.. opposites attract all the time…
      ask paula abdul..she was attracted to a rapping cartoon cat….

      • http://hunnybeezhive.blogspot.com Beez

        @shay_d_lady,

        “ask paula abdul..she was attracted to a rapping cartoon cat….”

        Time of Death: Whatever time this clock says.

      • http://hunnybeezhive.blogspot.com Beez

        @shay_d_lady,

        “ask paula abdul..she was attracted to a rapping cartoon cat….”

        Time of Death: Whatever time this clock says.

      • Peysonic Temple #69

        @shay_d_lady, it took me a minute but then i died

      • Peysonic Temple #69

        @shay_d_lady, it took me a minute but then i died

      • http://www.awesomelyluvvie.com Luvvie

        @shay_d_lady,

        There is a corner that is waiting for ur arrival. Please proceed to it w/ no protest. Kthx

      • http://www.awesomelyluvvie.com Luvvie

        @shay_d_lady,

        There is a corner that is waiting for ur arrival. Please proceed to it w/ no protest. Kthx

    • shay_d_lady

      @iloVEGrits, No way was the socially conscious hippie chick going for the short dude from Detroit who always had a scheme.

      i dont know VEG.. opposites attract all the time…
      ask paula abdul..she was attracted to a rapping cartoon cat….

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

      @iloVEGrits,

      “BTW, what the hell is caprini green?”

      a new kool-aid flavor i invented this weekend

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

      @iloVEGrits,

      “BTW, what the hell is caprini green?”

      a new kool-aid flavor i invented this weekend

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

      @iloVEGrits, i might have to agree with you on Ron and Freddie (though Luvvie is absolutely right).

      i just didn’t see them together in any way shape or form. them ninjas wasn’t yoked.

      Freddie was fine though.

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

      @iloVEGrits, i might have to agree with you on Ron and Freddie (though Luvvie is absolutely right).

      i just didn’t see them together in any way shape or form. them ninjas wasn’t yoked.

      Freddie was fine though.

    • http://blackwomanlost.blogspot.com Naturally Alise

      @iloVEGrits,

      Remember Freddie had got a perm too… she had flipped the script anyway, that move made the Ron-relationship more believable actually…

      • http://www.sistersoundoff.blogspot.com Cheekie

        @Naturally Alise,

        “Remember Freddie had got a perm too… she had flipped the script anyway, that move made the Ron-relationship more believable actually…”

        Yeah, this. And actually, since they argued so much, it was bound to happen due to standard TV show forumula. The ones that fight and banter always end up together at some point.

      • http://www.sistersoundoff.blogspot.com Cheekie

        @Naturally Alise,

        “Remember Freddie had got a perm too… she had flipped the script anyway, that move made the Ron-relationship more believable actually…”

        Yeah, this. And actually, since they argued so much, it was bound to happen due to standard TV show forumula. The ones that fight and banter always end up together at some point.

    • http://blackwomanlost.blogspot.com Naturally Alise

      @iloVEGrits,

      Remember Freddie had got a perm too… she had flipped the script anyway, that move made the Ron-relationship more believable actually…

    • http://stuffghettopeoplelike.wordpress.com Stuff Ghetto People Like

      Dwayne & Whitley didn’t even seem believable at first. We just kinda started rooting for them after a while.

      The Ron & Freddie thing was actually kinda hot in retrospect.

    • http://stuffghettopeoplelike.wordpress.com Stuff Ghetto People Like

      Dwayne & Whitley didn’t even seem believable at first. We just kinda started rooting for them after a while.

      The Ron & Freddie thing was actually kinda hot in retrospect.

  • http://stickwithyocat.blogspot.com/ iloVEGrits

    Winifred “Freddie” Brooks and Ron Johnson
    When “A Different World” got this couple together they just went too far. No way was the socially conscious hippie chick going for the short dude from Detroit who always had a scheme.

    BTW, what the hell is caprini green? I think ya meant Cabrini. :) No need to thank me.

    And Nicole Ari Parker (Reese) wasn’t that much taller than Taye (Dre)!

  • RedBeanzNRice

    Ok, I’ll overlook the fact that you’re a bit tardy with the post, Champ, cause the substance is good, lol.

    You forgot George and Weezy on The Jeffersons. I’m sayin’ her voice was deeper than his! The hell? And she don’t even have a neck. Guess that’s a good cover up for her Adam’s apple, though.

    • JamaicanGirl

      @RedBeanzNRice, I thought i was the only one who noticed the tardiness. I will forgive him, but i hope the chex was worth it.

      • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

        @JamaicanGirl,

        “I will forgive him, but i hope the chex was worth it.”

        if i had a dollar…

        • http://www.awesomelyluvvie.com Luvvie

          @The Champ,

          “if i had a dollar…”

          But you don’t. How many times we gotta go thru this, Champie?

          • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

            @Luvvie,

            go thru deez

            • http://www.awesomelyluvvie.com Luvvie

              @The Champ,

              “go thru deez”

              No.

            • http://www.awesomelyluvvie.com Luvvie

              @The Champ,

              “go thru deez”

              No.

          • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

            @Luvvie,

            go thru deez

        • http://www.awesomelyluvvie.com Luvvie

          @The Champ,

          “if i had a dollar…”

          But you don’t. How many times we gotta go thru this, Champie?

      • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

        @JamaicanGirl,

        “I will forgive him, but i hope the chex was worth it.”

        if i had a dollar…

    • JamaicanGirl

      @RedBeanzNRice, I thought i was the only one who noticed the tardiness. I will forgive him, but i hope the chex was worth it.

    • http://www.awesomelyluvvie.com Luvvie

      @RedBeanzNRice,

      “I’m sayin’ her voice was deeper than his! The hell?”

      Weezy’s voice was deeper than Barry White’s. If that was it, then Toni Braxton won’t be with her man either.

      • http://stickwithyocat.blogspot.com/ iloVEGrits

        @Luvvie,

        Toni’s voice ain’t THAT deep. Her speaking voice, anyway. And, um…the physical difference between her and Weezy is why Toni would have a man and Weezy, well…

        • RedBeanzNRice

          @iloVEGrits,

          “the physical difference between her and Weezy is why Toni would have a man and Weezy, well…”

          I’m not gonna say Weezy was ugly, but I damn sho’ won’t say she was cute, either, lol.

          • shay_d_lady

            @RedBeanzNRice, I’m not gonna say Weezy was ugly, but I damn sho’ won’t say she was cute, either, lol.

            but Sherman Hemsley aint winnin no attractiveness trophies either…and I really want to know what made his mama name him ‘Sherman”……

            • RedBeanzNRice

              @shay_d_lady,

              “but Sherman Hemsley aint winnin no attractiveness trophies either…”

              Shew, I don’t know what you talm bout, cause back in the day when the show first came on, Sherman was foine! I guess being married to Weezy all those years put some wear and tear on him.

            • RedBeanzNRice

              @shay_d_lady,

              “but Sherman Hemsley aint winnin no attractiveness trophies either…”

              Shew, I don’t know what you talm bout, cause back in the day when the show first came on, Sherman was foine! I guess being married to Weezy all those years put some wear and tear on him.

            • Me fail english?

              @shay_d_lady,

              Agreed. Sherman was short. Short men have to take what they can get!

            • Me fail english?

              @shay_d_lady,

              Agreed. Sherman was short. Short men have to take what they can get!

          • shay_d_lady

            @RedBeanzNRice, I’m not gonna say Weezy was ugly, but I damn sho’ won’t say she was cute, either, lol.

            but Sherman Hemsley aint winnin no attractiveness trophies either…and I really want to know what made his mama name him ‘Sherman”……

          • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

            @RedBeanzNRice, i’ll say it. she was fugly.

          • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

            @RedBeanzNRice, i’ll say it. she was fugly.

        • RedBeanzNRice

          @iloVEGrits,

          “the physical difference between her and Weezy is why Toni would have a man and Weezy, well…”

          I’m not gonna say Weezy was ugly, but I damn sho’ won’t say she was cute, either, lol.

      • http://stickwithyocat.blogspot.com/ iloVEGrits

        @Luvvie,

        Toni’s voice ain’t THAT deep. Her speaking voice, anyway. And, um…the physical difference between her and Weezy is why Toni would have a man and Weezy, well…

    • http://www.awesomelyluvvie.com Luvvie

      @RedBeanzNRice,

      “I’m sayin’ her voice was deeper than his! The hell?”

      Weezy’s voice was deeper than Barry White’s. If that was it, then Toni Braxton won’t be with her man either.

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

      @RedBeanzNRice,

      You forgot George and Weezy on The Jeffersons.

      you know what, i thought about them, but they match for some odd reason. maybe its the mustaches.

      • http://www.sistersoundoff.blogspot.com Cheekie

        @The Champ,

        And Weezy’s man-voice.

      • http://www.sistersoundoff.blogspot.com Cheekie

        @The Champ,

        And Weezy’s man-voice.

      • RedBeanzNRice

        @The Champ,
        “maybe its the mustaches.”

        Now see, I didn’t even think about that. Her mustache game was proper! That’s prolly how she kept George in check – he had an inferiority complex behind her stache being groomed better than his.

      • RedBeanzNRice

        @The Champ,
        “maybe its the mustaches.”

        Now see, I didn’t even think about that. Her mustache game was proper! That’s prolly how she kept George in check – he had an inferiority complex behind her stache being groomed better than his.

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

      @RedBeanzNRice,

      You forgot George and Weezy on The Jeffersons.

      you know what, i thought about them, but they match for some odd reason. maybe its the mustaches.

  • RedBeanzNRice

    Ok, I’ll overlook the fact that you’re a bit tardy with the post, Champ, cause the substance is good, lol.

    You forgot George and Weezy on The Jeffersons. I’m sayin’ her voice was deeper than his! The hell? And she don’t even have a neck. Guess that’s a good cover up for her Adam’s apple, though.

  • RedBeanzNRice

    Oh, and I forgot about another “The Jeffersons” couple. Tom and Helen Willis. Now, don’t get me wrong, cause it’s not the swirl I’m mad at. But I’m sayin’ if you’re gonna go there, why pick a big, fat, sweaty white dude when there’s plenty of good-looking white dudes out there?

    I’m not sure if I’m more mad at her husband selection, or her nostrils. I mean DAMN. What’s with the Dionne Warwick proboscis? Did something just smell so damn good that her nostrils permanently stayed flared, or did Tom just literally have her nose wide open? So many questions.

    • http://stickwithyocat.blogspot.com/ iloVEGrits

      @RedBeanzNRice,

      You are a fool. lol.

      • RedBeanzNRice

        @iloVEGrits,

        Hahahaha, but you know I ain’t lyin’ though!

      • RedBeanzNRice

        @iloVEGrits,

        Hahahaha, but you know I ain’t lyin’ though!

    • http://stickwithyocat.blogspot.com/ iloVEGrits

      @RedBeanzNRice,

      You are a fool. lol.

    • http://www.awesomelyluvvie.com Luvvie

      @RedBeanzNRice,

      Speaking of THE SWIRL! A couple that pissed me off to NO end was the pairing of Miranda and Blair Underwood on “Sex and the City”. They made me gag errtime I saw them kiss. Ain’t NO WAY Blair Underwood (and that SEGZY Harry Potter forehead scar of his) gon want Miranda’s asexual ornery *ss.

      Or that’s what I tell myself.

      • http://stickwithyocat.blogspot.com/ iloVEGrits

        @Luvvie,

        Interesting. I thoughT them pairing him with her made the most sense. Sam was too obvious and Charlotte and Carrie: I couldn’t see it. at all.

        Blair doesn’t do it for me…he looks like he beats women, so I didn’t mind seeing him with Red.

        • http://www.awesomelyluvvie.com Luvvie

          @iloVEGrits,

          WHAT?? First Idris, now BLAIR?? Next thang you gon tell me Denzel Washington doesn’t make you wanna shame your mama and ur Creole ancestors

          • http://stickwithyocat.blogspot.com/ iloVEGrits

            @Luvvie,

            Girl hush yo mouf! Denzel, even though he is up there in years, could git some.

            And the ancestors would be proud of what I’d do to him, not shamed.

            • http://www.awesomelyluvvie.com Luvvie

              @iloVEGrits,

              And for THIS, our friendship is restored. Please keep the Dereon friendship bracelet I made you. The one w/ the emblazoned “Friends Forever” in gold.

            • http://www.awesomelyluvvie.com Luvvie

              @iloVEGrits,

              And for THIS, our friendship is restored. Please keep the Dereon friendship bracelet I made you. The one w/ the emblazoned “Friends Forever” in gold.

            • http://www.sistersoundoff.blogspot.com Cheekie

              @iloVEGrits,

              “Girl hush yo mouf! Denzel, even though he is up there in years, could git some.”

              Yes, ma’am. That lazy-eyed ninja adorns my work computer wallpaper as we type. Yums.

            • http://www.sistersoundoff.blogspot.com Cheekie

              @iloVEGrits,

              “Girl hush yo mouf! Denzel, even though he is up there in years, could git some.”

              Yes, ma’am. That lazy-eyed ninja adorns my work computer wallpaper as we type. Yums.

          • http://stickwithyocat.blogspot.com/ iloVEGrits

            @Luvvie,

            Girl hush yo mouf! Denzel, even though he is up there in years, could git some.

            And the ancestors would be proud of what I’d do to him, not shamed.

        • http://www.awesomelyluvvie.com Luvvie

          @iloVEGrits,

          WHAT?? First Idris, now BLAIR?? Next thang you gon tell me Denzel Washington doesn’t make you wanna shame your mama and ur Creole ancestors

        • shay_d_lady

          @iloVEGrits, Blair doesn’t do it for me…he looks like he beats women, so I didn’t mind seeing him with Red.

          Blair has his moments but overall…its an eh.. I mean he has to have the right cut, the right outfit.. the right light…and be smiling…
          and then his name is Blair…. and he’s a man
          .. I just cant see screamin out Blair..

        • shay_d_lady

          @iloVEGrits, Blair doesn’t do it for me…he looks like he beats women, so I didn’t mind seeing him with Red.

          Blair has his moments but overall…its an eh.. I mean he has to have the right cut, the right outfit.. the right light…and be smiling…
          and then his name is Blair…. and he’s a man
          .. I just cant see screamin out Blair..

        • http://blackwomanlost.blogspot.com Naturally Alise

          @iloVEGrits,

          they had already matched Samantha up with a lack guy anyway, the one whose sister owned the restaurant they liked… but I must say this pair up upset me deeply, bc Miranda looks like what I imagine a human chicken pox strain would look like…

          • RedBeanzNRice

            @Naturally Alise,

            “with a lack guy ”

            I HOPE that wasn’t a Freudian slip.

          • RedBeanzNRice

            @Naturally Alise,

            “with a lack guy ”

            I HOPE that wasn’t a Freudian slip.

        • http://blackwomanlost.blogspot.com Naturally Alise

          @iloVEGrits,

          they had already matched Samantha up with a lack guy anyway, the one whose sister owned the restaurant they liked… but I must say this pair up upset me deeply, bc Miranda looks like what I imagine a human chicken pox strain would look like…

      • http://stickwithyocat.blogspot.com/ iloVEGrits

        @Luvvie,

        Interesting. I thoughT them pairing him with her made the most sense. Sam was too obvious and Charlotte and Carrie: I couldn’t see it. at all.

        Blair doesn’t do it for me…he looks like he beats women, so I didn’t mind seeing him with Red.

      • overit

        @Luvvie, “(and that SEGZY Harry Potter forehead scar of his)”

        you KNOW HP references bring me to the Quidditch field!

        for that, i used all my heaven points to put in a good word for you, all your hell points are gone, you are now at a 0. rack em up wisely!

        you are welcome:) GRYFFINDORRRRRRRRRRRR!

        • http://www.awesomelyluvvie.com Luvvie

          @overit,

          Expelliarmus!!!

          BTW, I’m SOOO geeked for Harry Potter & the Half-Blood Prince, coming out this summer. I’m doing a jig in anticipation of the awesome.

          Yes, I’m a dork.

          • http://hunnybeezhive.blogspot.com Beez

            @Luvvie,

            The only thing that matches my excitement for July 15 is the overwhelming sadness I felt upon learning that the movie, which was supposed to be released in November and was ready and err-thing, was being pushed to July… why Lawd, why?

            Anyway, I built a bridge, got over it, and am probably gonna make the trip to an IMAX theater for a “different” experience. I wanna coordinate a field trip!

            • SouthernGirl

              @Beez,

              i would be soooo down for that fieldtrip.

            • SouthernGirl

              @Beez,

              i would be soooo down for that fieldtrip.

            • http://www.awesomelyluvvie.com Luvvie

              @Beez,

              YES to the Harry Potter field trip. Let’s do it, ladies! We’d be the coolest dorks in that place!

            • http://www.awesomelyluvvie.com Luvvie

              @Beez,

              YES to the Harry Potter field trip. Let’s do it, ladies! We’d be the coolest dorks in that place!

            • http://hunnybeezhive.blogspot.com Beez

              @SouthernGirl & Luvvie,

              AW-RIGHT!!! I have a few hundred suggestions, but among them- we must wear scarves. Nice, thin, summery scarves. Before that, I must learn to knit. I would say we go with monogrammed sweaters a la Madame Weasley, but it’s summertime, and too hot for that ish in the Midwest. Have your peoples call my peoples (mainly, me) and we’ll get it planned!

              *squeeee*

            • http://hunnybeezhive.blogspot.com Beez

              @SouthernGirl & Luvvie,

              AW-RIGHT!!! I have a few hundred suggestions, but among them- we must wear scarves. Nice, thin, summery scarves. Before that, I must learn to knit. I would say we go with monogrammed sweaters a la Madame Weasley, but it’s summertime, and too hot for that ish in the Midwest. Have your peoples call my peoples (mainly, me) and we’ll get it planned!

              *squeeee*

            • SouthernGirl

              @Beez,

              “I would say we go with monogrammed sweaters a la Madame Weasley, but it’s summertime, and too hot for that ish in the Midwest.”

              lololol.

            • SouthernGirl

              @Beez,

              “I would say we go with monogrammed sweaters a la Madame Weasley, but it’s summertime, and too hot for that ish in the Midwest.”

              lololol.

          • http://hunnybeezhive.blogspot.com Beez

            @Luvvie,

            The only thing that matches my excitement for July 15 is the overwhelming sadness I felt upon learning that the movie, which was supposed to be released in November and was ready and err-thing, was being pushed to July… why Lawd, why?

            Anyway, I built a bridge, got over it, and am probably gonna make the trip to an IMAX theater for a “different” experience. I wanna coordinate a field trip!

        • http://www.awesomelyluvvie.com Luvvie

          @overit,

          Expelliarmus!!!

          BTW, I’m SOOO geeked for Harry Potter & the Half-Blood Prince, coming out this summer. I’m doing a jig in anticipation of the awesome.

          Yes, I’m a dork.

      • overit

        @Luvvie, “(and that SEGZY Harry Potter forehead scar of his)”

        you KNOW HP references bring me to the Quidditch field!

        for that, i used all my heaven points to put in a good word for you, all your hell points are gone, you are now at a 0. rack em up wisely!

        you are welcome:) GRYFFINDORRRRRRRRRRRR!

    • http://www.awesomelyluvvie.com Luvvie

      @RedBeanzNRice,

      Speaking of THE SWIRL! A couple that pissed me off to NO end was the pairing of Miranda and Blair Underwood on “Sex and the City”. They made me gag errtime I saw them kiss. Ain’t NO WAY Blair Underwood (and that SEGZY Harry Potter forehead scar of his) gon want Miranda’s asexual ornery *ss.

      Or that’s what I tell myself.

    • Nikiloveli

      @RedBeanzNRice,

      See you? You and Helen’s nostrils just woke my baby! Wrongness!
      LMAO!

    • Nikiloveli

      @RedBeanzNRice,

      See you? You and Helen’s nostrils just woke my baby! Wrongness!
      LMAO!

    • http://hunnybeezhive.blogspot.com Beez

      @RedBeanzNRice,

      I won’t even hate on the absurdity of Mz. Helen’s nostrils. They helped produce Lenny Kravitz, a piece of work that I sometimes can’t stop staring at. :)

      • RedBeanzNRice

        @Beez,

        I think Jenny is Lenny’s mom.

        • Voiceofreason

          @RedBeanzNRice,

          It was definitely Helen.

          • RedBeanzNRice

            @Voiceofreason,

            Well, ya learn something new everyday! Would you believe that’s only the 3rd time in my life I’ve ever been wrong? ;)

            • Voiceofreason

              @RedBeanzNRice,

              Wow! You beat my record. I’ve only been wrong four times. :)

            • Voiceofreason

              @RedBeanzNRice,

              Wow! You beat my record. I’ve only been wrong four times. :)

          • RedBeanzNRice

            @Voiceofreason,

            Well, ya learn something new everyday! Would you believe that’s only the 3rd time in my life I’ve ever been wrong? ;)

        • Voiceofreason

          @RedBeanzNRice,

          It was definitely Helen.

      • RedBeanzNRice

        @Beez,

        I think Jenny is Lenny’s mom.

      • pinksghetti

        @Beez,
        co-sign on Lenny Kravitz. He is so hot, been crushing on him for almost 20 yrs and he still looks good.

        • miss t-lee

          @pinksghetti,
          You see them latest pics of him in the shower?
          Yum.

          • RedBeanzNRice

            @miss t-lee,

            Yeah, yum, as long as he’s wearing shades. Cockeyed men are scary. I mean, you don’t even know who they’re looking at when they’re talking.

            • miss t-lee

              @RedBeanzNRice,
              Hey…I was talking body wise…lol

            • miss t-lee

              @RedBeanzNRice,
              Hey…I was talking body wise…lol

          • RedBeanzNRice

            @miss t-lee,

            Yeah, yum, as long as he’s wearing shades. Cockeyed men are scary. I mean, you don’t even know who they’re looking at when they’re talking.

          • pinksghetti

            @miss t-lee,
            No unfortunately not. But I still reminisce (or however it’s spelled, lol) over his music video from back in the 90’s where he dropped his towel and showed side booty.

            • miss t-lee

              @pinksghetti,
              That’s what you get to see in the new shower pics. Google ’em when you get a chance…

            • miss t-lee

              @pinksghetti,
              That’s what you get to see in the new shower pics. Google ’em when you get a chance…

          • pinksghetti

            @miss t-lee,
            No unfortunately not. But I still reminisce (or however it’s spelled, lol) over his music video from back in the 90’s where he dropped his towel and showed side booty.

        • miss t-lee

          @pinksghetti,
          You see them latest pics of him in the shower?
          Yum.

        • iloV.E.G.rits

          @pinksghetti,

          Ditto

        • iloV.E.G.rits

          @pinksghetti,

          Ditto

      • pinksghetti

        @Beez,
        co-sign on Lenny Kravitz. He is so hot, been crushing on him for almost 20 yrs and he still looks good.

    • http://hunnybeezhive.blogspot.com Beez

      @RedBeanzNRice,

      I won’t even hate on the absurdity of Mz. Helen’s nostrils. They helped produce Lenny Kravitz, a piece of work that I sometimes can’t stop staring at. :)

  • RedBeanzNRice

    Oh, and I forgot about another “The Jeffersons” couple. Tom and Helen Willis. Now, don’t get me wrong, cause it’s not the swirl I’m mad at. But I’m sayin’ if you’re gonna go there, why pick a big, fat, sweaty white dude when there’s plenty of good-looking white dudes out there?

    I’m not sure if I’m more mad at her husband selection, or her nostrils. I mean DAMN. What’s with the Dionne Warwick proboscis? Did something just smell so damn good that her nostrils permanently stayed flared, or did Tom just literally have her nose wide open? So many questions.

  • http://www.awesomelyluvvie.com Luvvie

    Oh, and Champ, if your soul ain’t gloing quite right today, it’s because the Rolle Ghost is haunting you. You went IN on Florida!

    BTW, her afro always seemed so solid. Twas like a helmet. Nay, a NATURAL hairhat. Yup.

    • RedBeanzNRice

      @Luvvie,

      “BTW, her afro always seemed so solid.”

      I gotta agree on that one, except for the few times I saw a few holes in her fro – like the makeup department didn’t have afro combs. Po’ James, though, cause his fro was always fried, but never laid to the side. *sighs* And why did they ALWAYS have him wearing that same pair of pants EVERY DAMN EPISODE, but Thelma’s stank butt always had fresh gear?

      And now that I think about it, weren’t they supposed to be poor as hell? Well why the hell was the frigidaire always stocked with good stuff like cakes, sweet potato pie and fried chicken? And how come everybody had clothes except for James? And why did Florida always wear orange? Was that supposed to be punny? “Florida Orange”? Lame – even for the 70’s.

      But I dug me some Wilona, though, cause she ain’t take no mess offa NOBODY – not even Sweet Daddy Williams.

      Damn, I digressed. Yeah, it’s my bedtime, lol.

      • JamaicanGirl

        @RedBeanzNRice, Well alrighty then. I must agree with you about the wadrobe, something was was fishy, Thelma was always looking fresh with her perfectly ironed bell bottom jeans and tie front plaid shirts while James always rocked those tired corduroys.

        Major *— side eye *— for the wardrobe department.

      • JamaicanGirl

        @RedBeanzNRice, Well alrighty then. I must agree with you about the wadrobe, something was was fishy, Thelma was always looking fresh with her perfectly ironed bell bottom jeans and tie front plaid shirts while James always rocked those tired corduroys.

        Major *— side eye *— for the wardrobe department.

      • Me fail english?

        @RedBeanzNRice,

        Makes sense to me. Who yall know in the projects walks around looking dusty but some old men? Now the food on the other hand…a stocked fridge in the bricks just doesn’t happen.

        • shay_d_lady

          @Me fail english?, a stocked fridge in the bricks just doesn’t happen.

          shyt why the he.ll not? every project house I know had a fridge full of leg quarters, ice potatoes, eggs bread and “lunch meat”…throw in some kool aid and dry goods and there you have it.. now if they had steaks, and skrimps, and leafy fresh vegetables..then that would be questionable….especially since Flo didnt take no assistance…

          • Me fail english?

            @shay_d_lady,

            lol. That stuff you named isn’t the same as”stocked” in the way RedBeanz was listing. But then again, I never really paid attn to what the Evans’ ate…until the episode they almost had dog food casserole. heheheheh

            • shay_d_lady

              @Me fail english?, That stuff you named isn’t the same as”stocked” in the way RedBeanz was listing. But then again, I never really paid attn to what the Evans’ ate…until the episode they almost had dog food casserole. heheheheh

              girl I remember that episode…LOL she brought that meat loaf and everybody was side eyeing it..damn

              but on another note…that stuff is what you make the fried chicken, cakes and sweet potato pie with chile…
              honestly though the hood fridge’s stay stocked.. its the ninjas with good jobs that dont normally have shyt but bread, wine and energy drinks in they joint…maybe cause they know when they get hungry they can just go to the store.. hood folks gone and stock up when they get it.. so its either full or empty. no in between..LOL

            • shay_d_lady

              @Me fail english?, That stuff you named isn’t the same as”stocked” in the way RedBeanz was listing. But then again, I never really paid attn to what the Evans’ ate…until the episode they almost had dog food casserole. heheheheh

              girl I remember that episode…LOL she brought that meat loaf and everybody was side eyeing it..damn

              but on another note…that stuff is what you make the fried chicken, cakes and sweet potato pie with chile…
              honestly though the hood fridge’s stay stocked.. its the ninjas with good jobs that dont normally have shyt but bread, wine and energy drinks in they joint…maybe cause they know when they get hungry they can just go to the store.. hood folks gone and stock up when they get it.. so its either full or empty. no in between..LOL

          • Me fail english?

            @shay_d_lady,

            lol. That stuff you named isn’t the same as”stocked” in the way RedBeanz was listing. But then again, I never really paid attn to what the Evans’ ate…until the episode they almost had dog food casserole. heheheheh

        • shay_d_lady

          @Me fail english?, a stocked fridge in the bricks just doesn’t happen.

          shyt why the he.ll not? every project house I know had a fridge full of leg quarters, ice potatoes, eggs bread and “lunch meat”…throw in some kool aid and dry goods and there you have it.. now if they had steaks, and skrimps, and leafy fresh vegetables..then that would be questionable….especially since Flo didnt take no assistance…

        • Ms. T

          @Me fail english?,
          Not even with food stamps???

          • Me fail english?

            @Ms. T,

            In my experience even WIC couldn’t make the fridge look “stocked”. Maybe stamps don’t go as far up here.

          • Me fail english?

            @Ms. T,

            In my experience even WIC couldn’t make the fridge look “stocked”. Maybe stamps don’t go as far up here.

        • Ms. T

          @Me fail english?,
          Not even with food stamps???

      • Me fail english?

        @RedBeanzNRice,

        Makes sense to me. Who yall know in the projects walks around looking dusty but some old men? Now the food on the other hand…a stocked fridge in the bricks just doesn’t happen.

      • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

        @RedBeanzNRice,

        “And now that I think about it, weren’t they supposed to be poor as hell? Well why the hell was the frigidaire always stocked with good stuff like cakes, sweet potato pie and fried chicken? And how come everybody had clothes except for James? And why did Florida always wear orange? Was that supposed to be punny? “Florida Orange”? Lame – even for the 70’s.”

        remember, these are the same people who thought it would be believable to cast a 35 year old man and a 53 year old woman as husband and wife, and also employed a 26 year old actor to play their eldest son. lets just say that they weren’t stuck on the realness

        • Me fail english?

          @The Champ,

          I don’t know how I missed this stuff. JJ looked older than 17 but until you said something about Flawda, I thought she and James were the same age. He mustve been aging horribly, or she, particularly well

          • http://www.awesomelyluvvie.com Luvvie

            @Me fail english?,

            1. “Flawda” is the only way I shall refer to her from now on.

            b. Esther Rolle ain’t age particularly well. She was proff that Black indeed, does crack.

            3a. I think James’ busted bozo Afro is what did him the world of disservice.

            • Me fail english?

              @Luvvie,

              Word. Now that I think of it, he looked older on Good Times than he did in Player’s Club! Damn that killer clown fro!

            • Me fail english?

              @Luvvie,

              Word. Now that I think of it, he looked older on Good Times than he did in Player’s Club! Damn that killer clown fro!

          • http://www.awesomelyluvvie.com Luvvie

            @Me fail english?,

            1. “Flawda” is the only way I shall refer to her from now on.

            b. Esther Rolle ain’t age particularly well. She was proff that Black indeed, does crack.

            3a. I think James’ busted bozo Afro is what did him the world of disservice.

        • Me fail english?

          @The Champ,

          I don’t know how I missed this stuff. JJ looked older than 17 but until you said something about Flawda, I thought she and James were the same age. He mustve been aging horribly, or she, particularly well

      • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

        @RedBeanzNRice,

        “And now that I think about it, weren’t they supposed to be poor as hell? Well why the hell was the frigidaire always stocked with good stuff like cakes, sweet potato pie and fried chicken? And how come everybody had clothes except for James? And why did Florida always wear orange? Was that supposed to be punny? “Florida Orange”? Lame – even for the 70’s.”

        remember, these are the same people who thought it would be believable to cast a 35 year old man and a 53 year old woman as husband and wife, and also employed a 26 year old actor to play their eldest son. lets just say that they weren’t stuck on the realness

    • RedBeanzNRice

      @Luvvie,

      “BTW, her afro always seemed so solid.”

      I gotta agree on that one, except for the few times I saw a few holes in her fro – like the makeup department didn’t have afro combs. Po’ James, though, cause his fro was always fried, but never laid to the side. *sighs* And why did they ALWAYS have him wearing that same pair of pants EVERY DAMN EPISODE, but Thelma’s stank butt always had fresh gear?

      And now that I think about it, weren’t they supposed to be poor as hell? Well why the hell was the frigidaire always stocked with good stuff like cakes, sweet potato pie and fried chicken? And how come everybody had clothes except for James? And why did Florida always wear orange? Was that supposed to be punny? “Florida Orange”? Lame – even for the 70’s.

      But I dug me some Wilona, though, cause she ain’t take no mess offa NOBODY – not even Sweet Daddy Williams.

      Damn, I digressed. Yeah, it’s my bedtime, lol.

  • http://www.awesomelyluvvie.com Luvvie

    Oh, and Champ, if your soul ain’t gloing quite right today, it’s because the Rolle Ghost is haunting you. You went IN on Florida!

    BTW, her afro always seemed so solid. Twas like a helmet. Nay, a NATURAL hairhat. Yup.

  • overit

    james was getting that good backroom project gotdamn from someone who could have been his f*cking grandmother. no wonder he couldn’t keep a job for longer than eight days. it must of been hard reporting to work with the smell of..

    LMAO, iHATEYOUSOMUCHRIGHTNOW. all i can remember is when she passed, my little brother and i were at the grocery store and i was like “oh no, florida evans died” and he said, “yeah, died of ugliness”. RUDE.

    i can’t dissect good times, and i’m surprised u aint discuss how unrealistic it was florida produced thelma…

    *facing east and praying for forgiveness*

    • http://stickwithyocat.blogspot.com/ iloVEGrits

      @overit,

      “i’m surprised u aint discuss how unrealistic it was florida produced thelma”

      lolol. Go sat down!

    • http://stickwithyocat.blogspot.com/ iloVEGrits

      @overit,

      “i’m surprised u aint discuss how unrealistic it was florida produced thelma”

      lolol. Go sat down!

    • http://www.awesomelyluvvie.com Luvvie

      @overit,

      “i can’t dissect good times, and i’m surprised u aint discuss how unrealistic it was florida produced thelma…”

      iCan’t w/ you, Zee. LMAO!

      • JamaicanGirl

        @Luvvie, **** Dead****

      • JamaicanGirl

        @Luvvie, **** Dead****

    • http://www.awesomelyluvvie.com Luvvie

      @overit,

      “i can’t dissect good times, and i’m surprised u aint discuss how unrealistic it was florida produced thelma…”

      iCan’t w/ you, Zee. LMAO!

    • http://www.awesomelyluvvie.com Luvvie

      @overit,

      “all i can remember is when she passed, my little brother and i were at the grocery store and i was like “oh no, florida evans died” and he said, “yeah, died of ugliness”. RUDE.”

      Well I just died from this foolishness. LMAO!!! One ain’t sposed to speak ill of the dead and gone, so…

      *kneels down* Lord, please forgive me. you know my heart is pure. My motives are so clean. It’s my words and actions that are charcoal.

    • http://www.awesomelyluvvie.com Luvvie

      @overit,

      “all i can remember is when she passed, my little brother and i were at the grocery store and i was like “oh no, florida evans died” and he said, “yeah, died of ugliness”. RUDE.”

      Well I just died from this foolishness. LMAO!!! One ain’t sposed to speak ill of the dead and gone, so…

      *kneels down* Lord, please forgive me. you know my heart is pure. My motives are so clean. It’s my words and actions that are charcoal.

    • shay_d_lady

      @overit, I forgive you …and your brother..when I heard po dorothy died of cancer..but wanted the type of cancer to remain secret.. my first thought was prostate cancer…..
      I know Im wrong but cmon why else keep it a secret?…
      talk about an unrealistic relationship……

      • miss t-lee

        @shay_d_lady,
        my first thought was prostate cancer…..
        I know Im wrong but cmon why else keep it a secret?

        This comment is like wrong on 27 different levels…but I’m still laughing.

        Reminds me of one of my homeboys…who has obviously had gastric bypass surgery but won’t admit to it. So when he got out of the hospital after a few weeks, I asked him what was wrong. He wouldn’t say, so I told him it was okay that he’d gotten his balls removed.

        He didn’t find it amusing.

      • miss t-lee

        @shay_d_lady,
        my first thought was prostate cancer…..
        I know Im wrong but cmon why else keep it a secret?

        This comment is like wrong on 27 different levels…but I’m still laughing.

        Reminds me of one of my homeboys…who has obviously had gastric bypass surgery but won’t admit to it. So when he got out of the hospital after a few weeks, I asked him what was wrong. He wouldn’t say, so I told him it was okay that he’d gotten his balls removed.

        He didn’t find it amusing.

    • shay_d_lady

      @overit, I forgive you …and your brother..when I heard po dorothy died of cancer..but wanted the type of cancer to remain secret.. my first thought was prostate cancer…..
      I know Im wrong but cmon why else keep it a secret?…
      talk about an unrealistic relationship……

  • overit

    james was getting that good backroom project gotdamn from someone who could have been his f*cking grandmother. no wonder he couldn’t keep a job for longer than eight days. it must of been hard reporting to work with the smell of..

    LMAO, iHATEYOUSOMUCHRIGHTNOW. all i can remember is when she passed, my little brother and i were at the grocery store and i was like “oh no, florida evans died” and he said, “yeah, died of ugliness”. RUDE.

    i can’t dissect good times, and i’m surprised u aint discuss how unrealistic it was florida produced thelma…

    *facing east and praying for forgiveness*

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