Category Archives: politics

Five Ways Black Movies Can Do Better

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Um, yeah.

“…while there have been quite a few entertaining Black movies produced in the last decade or so, the only ones that would be categorized as “very good” or “great” in the same way a “Boyz n the Hood” or a even a “Devil in a Blue Dress” would be are films like “Precious” that deal with subjects so unrelentingly heavy and depressing that moviegoers should watch them with buckets of hot buttered Zoloft instead of popcorn.”

This quote is from “Three Ways That Black Movies Can Do Better,” an article published at Ebony.com yesterday that discusses how the best term to describe the Black movies made in the last decade or so is “instantly forgettable,” and lists some things that can be done to reverse this trend.

And, while I think the three things I listed (1. Bring The Sexy Back, 2. Chill With All The Church Scenes, and 3. Hire Angela Nissel) represent a good, safe start, my word count limit and the fact that, for obvious reasons, I can’t be as, um, “colorful” as I want to be when writing there limited what I was able to say…and how I was able to say it.

Today, here’s the rest of what I would have said yesterday if I wasn’t strong-armed by the Team Ebony Drop Squad.¹

4. Chill With The Got Damn Positive F*cking Messages All The Damn Time

Two of the three best Black movies I’ve seen in the last decade² both had cameos from numerous porn stars and strippers, both revolved around pimps who did some truly effed up things during the course of the movie, both dealt with a seedy urban underworld, and both featured dozens of hilariously misogynistic, racist, and homophobic jokes. And while “Black Dynamite” and “Hustle & Flow” were entirely different types of movies, part of what made them as entertaining as they were was the fact that they reveled in and had fun with some very “unpositive” subject matter. Yet, despite the fact that they were both good movies that featured numerous working Black people, neither got anywhere near the guilt-trip marketing push that “positive” or “important” movies like “Red Tails” usually receive.

I understand why Black filmmakers may feel burdened to always have some type of positive message in their movies. Generally speaking, we (Black film goers) are some thin-skinned motherf*ckers who will think nothing of creating a petition to protest anything less than an onscreen depiction of a “Black life” that never actually existed.

Still, despite the inevitable push back from the Black Blog Tea Party, I think there’s enough of us who don’t necessarily need to have positive and/or message-laden shit pushed down our throats to have a good time at the movies, and I think we’re ready for some Black filmmakers to start having some more quality and ratchet fun.

5. More Nicole Beharie

I don’t believe in the Illuminati, but I do believe that there’s a secret Black society led by Steadman Graham (Why Steadman? Because he doesn’t have shit else do to.) that forces each burgeoning Black producer or director to cast either Paula Patton, Taraji P. Henson, or Meagan Good in their movies. I know it seems far-fetched, but it has to be the only reason why one of those three chicks has been in every single Black movie made in the past eight years.

I know secret societies love them some fresh blood to hold their ceremonies with, so why not cast Beharie in one of those roles? She’s hot, she’s talented, she’s wicked smart, and, wait…did I mention how hot she is?

Anyway people of VSB.com, what do you think needs to happen to make Black movies less damn forgettable? What additions or subtractions would you make if you were Black Movie Czar for a day?

¹Just to be clear, I realize there are a ton of indie Black films that would definitely qualify as quality and entertaining. Today though, I’m more focused on major motion pictures. 
²The third movie? “Akeelah and the Bee”

—Damon Young (aka “The Champ”)

***For all the folks in the DC area, this Saturday, April 7, from 930pm-3am at Liv Nightclub (11th and U Street, NW) is another edition of #REMINISCE, the party dedicated to all 90s everything brought to you by VSB, Shine On Me, and Just Cause Events. It’s FREE BEFORE 11 w/RSVP (reminiscedc.eventbrite.com), a Courvoisier sponosred open bar from 930-1030pm, and no dress code! It’s cheaper to come out and party. Last month’s party was OFF THE HINGES! Somebody shook my hand when they left and just said, “Thanks P, for throwing this party…” <—- not lying. So come and make it do what it do this Saturday at Reminisce!***

What If We Were Wrong About Trayvon?

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Aside from finding an answer to the always awkward “So…who gets to “keep” the mutual friends?” question every newly uncoupled duo needs to ask themselves, the most difficult part of making the transition to “single” for me has been figuring out how to categorize memories. More specifically, are the great times you spent with your ex remembered in the same way once the relationship ends? Does that trip you took together to Rome or that unbelievable birthday he threw for you still get filed under “great” in your memory banks, do you create an entirely different category to archive those memories, or do you just try your best to expel them completely?

It seems as if the answer depends on the nature of the break-up. I imagine that people who ended relationships because of serious betrayal have a tougher time thinking positively of anything that happened in the time they were in that relationship. And, even if they do have a fondness for those things, how do they deal with the fact that a fond memory was eventually found to be a complete fabrication? (An example: You found out that your trip to Rome was only possible because his mistress works for Delta and hooked him up with free plane tickets)

While I understand the sentiment behind allowing a present experience affect how you remember the past, I think doing so cheats yourself out of one of the best parts of living. Learning that the relationship itself may not have been everything you thought it was doesn’t negate the authentic feeling felt when those memories were created. Your joy and happiness wasn’t inauthentic; it was your genuine reaction to something good happening. And, since most relationships, even good ones, eventually end, re-categorizing all good things that happened in relationships that eventually ended from “good” to “f*ck that shit” would ultimately leave most of us with no good memories at all.

Anyway, a couple weeks ago I wrote about the fact that the Trayvon Martin case has galvanized us in a way that, to be honest, I can’t remember happening at any other point in my lifetime. Seeing us collectively committed to righting this wrong almost makes me feel as good as the event causing us to come together makes me feel bad, and many seem to share this sentiment.

Still, despite our steadfast commitment to making damn sure our outrage is felt and our demands are heeded, the fact remains that there are still only three relevant facts regarding this case:

1. Trayvon Martin, an unarmed teen, was killed by neighborhood watchman George Zimmerman.

2. George Zimmerman is still free

3. Aside from Zimmerman, Martin, (maybe) a few witnesses, and God, no one knows exactly what happened that night.

Now, I’m not here today to speculate on what I think happened¹ or even what anyone else thinks happened. Instead, I want to play hypothetical for a moment and ask “What if?”²

What if the reckless shit some are spewing about Trayvon being the aggressor and beating Zimmerman to a pulp happens to be true? What if the gun accidentally went off after a struggle? What if he really was a problem child who, to paraphrase the words of a dozen or so dangerously contrarian conservative columnists, “had it coming?” What if Zimmerman’s life was in real danger?

I’m asking because I wonder if would it change how we’ve felt about the last few weeks of walk-outs, petition-signing, rally-attending, hoodie-wearing, and protest-marching if any of this was found to be true. Would the outrage still be as white hot if we found out that our perception of what happened that night was completely off? Would the collective galvanization still feel as real? Would the strides we’ve made in proving to ourselves that “yes we can actually unite behind a cause” prove to be inauthentic? Would we continue to, to quote Slim Charles, “fight on that lie“?

I want to believe everything I want to believe about Trayvon, and I want to believe that even if those beliefs aren’t true, my feelings about this collective effort wouldn’t change. I’d like to think I’d follow my own advice about how not to let context cloud memories, but l desperately hope I never have to answer any of those questions.

¹I think that Zimmerman stalked, followed, and confronted Martin and shot him in a scared panic. Cold-blooded murder? No. But, his fear speaks to the latent feeling many have towards Black males, and since this fear resulted in the death of an unarmed kid, he deserves to be behind bars.
²Just wanted to remind everybody that writing a hypothetical “what if” doesn’t mean that I personally believe what’s stated in the hypothetical. It’s just a hypothetical, nothing more. 

—Damon Young (aka “The Champ”)

In Honor Of Trayvon Martin And The #MillionHoodieMarch

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Something dawned on me last night while reflecting on all the reading, listening, writing, tweeting, and talking I’ve devoted to all things Trayvon Martin in the last couple of days. Something feels different about this. 

Now, I realize that it could just be me. From Troy Davis and K.O.N.Y. to Tookie and Derrion Albert, there have been numerous recent instances of viral activism and virtual galvanization; causes we collectively championed and people we collectively cried for. I was not as taken by any of those as much as I’ve been taken by Trayvon Martin, and I accept the possibility that this “different feeling” could just be a bit of personal confirmation bias. Of course things are different now. Why? Because I’m finally involved and invested.

With that being said — and recognizing that this could all be in my head — I can not ignore the fact that something about this just feels different. The outrage seems a little hotter. The tears seem a little saltier. That sickness in our stomachs seems a little deeper. And, most importantly, that feeling of “I-don’t-know-what-do-to, but-we-f*cking-need-to-do-something”-ness seems a little stronger.

Hmm. A few days ago, I was talking to my mom about, I don’t know, work or bacon or some other typical bullshit daily minutiae, and right when I was about to get off the phone, she asked “Damon, what do you believe in?”

Even though I heard what she said, I asked her to repeat it because the question caught me so off guard. She did, and I asked if I could get back to her with an answer another time. She laughed, replied “Sure,” but added “You definitely need to think about that, though. You should be able to give me an answer.”

It’s been three days since she asked me that question. I still haven’t thought of a good answer. But, if the Trayvon Martin case has taught me anything, it’s that it’s time for me, time for us, to believe in something, and it feels like we’re finally ready and willing to do that.

—Damon Young (aka “The Champ”)

 

Random PSA:  Liz is executive producing (yet another) web series for MadameNoire.com called “Ask A Black Man”–a talk show featuring Black men. The topics are all about love, sex, marriage and dating. You won’t want to miss this. New shows air every Wednesday on Madame Noire starting next Wednesday, March 28th. Stay tuned for the trailer. They’re rolling out the bios of each cast member. First up? Panama Jackson, who will appear in two episodes. Check out his bio and some sexxy (for a 3) photos here.

K.O.N.Y. 2012

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(For the record, I’m aware that it’s merely KONY 2012, but I’m going to make a point with that.)

Criticism, like love, is a many splendored thing. Truth is, it’s way easier to criticize something or somebody than it is to acknowledge that something or somebody is actually attempting to make a difference and give credit where credit is due. Such brings us to the present day (well last week and running currently) KONY 2012 campaign by the company and organization Invisible Children.

To be fair, I knew very little about this until yesterday when I read somebody’s Facebook status criticizing the Kony 2012 thing on the grounds that anybody who cares about this now and didn’t pay attention to any myriad African causes is hypocrtical and ill-informed. Fair enough, but totally misses the boat. But we’ll get to that in a moment. Back to me just finding out what in Sam Hill this Kony thing is about.

I’d heard mention of it last week when somebody mentioned some video for Kony. Now, I obviously listen to too much hip-hop because I immediately thought it was some sort of King of New York upcoming tribute to the Notorious B.I.G. Or some wayward reworking of T.O.N.Y. by Capone-N-Noreaga. And because I didn’t care, I let that b*tch breathe. Again, too much hip-hop. But after seeing the critical FB message I watched the entire video, all roughly 30 minutes of it, at work, and found myself in awe at this organizations presentation AND plan to bring attention and awareness to a cause.

Let’s forget the actual target of the cause for a second. Let’s talk about the method. It’s sheer brilliance. In today’s social media driven landscape, Invisible Chidlren, created a video where they showed the birth of a movement from inception to action. And that my friends is impressive. And it’s one that takes full advantage of the way youth move in this nation now from creating viral campaigns and utilizing that message to effect change to the point where the President takes notice and does something entirely based on their work and advocacy. That is how you do something. That’s how you make a difference. I must say that I was completely impressed and inspired by the dedication it took to be both patient enough and believe in something enough to stick with it for the long haul. And the method of creating propoganda to make the man’s name a household name isn’t even obnoxious like some of the Occupy camps that popped up. Interesting that immediate reaction was to draw comparisons. I’m human. Sue me.

Joseph Kony, one of the leaders of Uganda’s Lord’s Resistance Army, is undoubtedly a bad man. And while there’s NO way that any 30 minute video could fully capture the complexity of the issue of Kony’s crimes against humanity and the creation of child rebel soldiers, what this video did was create an entire awareness to possibly as many as 74 million people who watched the video on YouTube and who knows how many others who’ve read about it since last week (March 5).

Obviously, that creates controversy. Which is where the criticisms start to come in (all easily Google-able). Is it too little too late? Some say that Kony is nowhere near as much of an issue as he was 10 years ago in Uganda. Maybe true, but he’s still on the ICC’s list of wanted criminals. Some say this video has done more damage than good by giving Kony the heads up that the USA and Uganda are looking for him and will force him to change up his methods of hiding (he’s on the run). Others claim that this organization isn’t clear and transparent about their actual charity work, etc. A claim that the organization itself hasn’t been shy about addressing. Others think the video had the wrong focus. And some folks are claiming some type of “why do you people care now when you didn’t care about anything else….”

I can honestly say that I hate people who make that last argument. You can’t do anything about anything unless you know about it. Speeches only reaches those that know it exists. Knowing what to care about is impossible unless everybody knows where to find out about what’s going on. Which is why this campaign is brilliant. You don’t know who Joseph Kony is? Watch the video. I guarantee you will by the end.

And that’s the point. Creating awareness about somebody in order to get the public consciousness on board. That’s the only way you get change. The Civil Rights movement wouldn’t have lasted if 100 people boarded that train. It wasn’t until the nation saw the brutality in Birmingham and the water hoses and police dogs attacking defenseless and peaceful protestors that the nation got on board (for the most part) with the Civil Rights movement. Which is why I think that much of the criticism levied against the Kony 2012 movement and the Invisible Children organization is sour grapes. This org found a target and found a way to make people care or at least pay attention. I guarantee you that there are people who know Joseph Kony’s name that would NEVER have known under any other circumstance. And that cannot be a bad thing.

At all.

Awareness. It’s the key to change. It’s why the message for every Spike Lee movie is to “wake up”. Pay attention. Be aware of what’s really going on. That’s the premise of Kony 2012. If we were smart, we’d take a lesson from this organization and do the same damn thing with other causes. It’s why Occupy Wall Street both succeeded and failed. It succeeded because for a legit moment in time, everybody was talking about it. It failed because unlike Kony 2012, at some point, it was all just rhetoric and nobody really knew what the hell to ask for.

If you bring awareness to tragedy, at some point people have to do something right. You can’t stick your head in the sand forever. And to me, this method and the cause are worthy of note.

And to be fully honest, at first I was ready to write this entire thing off as more white guilt and liberal do-gooderism until I really started thinking about the fact that you know what, if that sh*t helps to change the world, then I’m all for it. Sometimes, those who seem the most annoying and obnoxious really do have their hearts in the right place and because they care that much, and are white, they’ll have the time, resources, and desire to see something through.

If that helps me get a home loan. Sign me up.

So, good people of VSB, what do you think about the KONY 2012 campaign and ensuing dustup and debate? Hell, do you think about it at all?

-VSB P aka THE ARSONIST aka MR. I WATCHED THE WHOLE VIDEO WHERE’S MY ACTION KIT aka GIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIRL HE A 3

*Have you signed up for the VSB VIP List? If not, go on ahead and do it so that you can receive emailed listings of events sponsored or supported by VSB and other goings ons in your area. Plus you get more of that good ole VSB charm and pizzazz via email. Look, seriously, my mom asked me to ask you to do it, mmkay?*

Oh, And About Assholes And The Women Who Love Them…

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It happens at least once a season. Someone on a few high profile blogs or websites will state their particular take about the whole “women are attracted to assholes” thing, and, as was seen last week at Jezebel, The National Review, Male Fide, and Chateau Heartiste, each of the (combined) thousands of responses these articles will generate will fit into one of eight categories.

1. Women using anecdotal evidence to deny that women are attracted to assholes. 

2. Women saying that it is true…for young women and stupid women. Mature women don’t  fall for the same tricks

3. Women saying “It’s not that we like assholes, it’s just that “nice” guys are usually assholes in disguise. So, why not just deal with the real thing?”

4. Women reluctantly agreeing with the theory that asshole men are generally more attractive to women, and cursing God for giving them such predictable vaginas

5. Women happily agreeing that it’s true that women are into jerks. 

6. Men using anecdotal evidence to state that assholes don’t win. (i.e. “I’m a nice guy, and I stay swimming in ass, yo.“)

7. Men stating that assholes do win, and also saying that any woman (or man) who doesn’t agree is being dishonest.

8. Men stating that assholes win, and using this info as proof that women are generally f*cked up people, and also using it as an excuse for why their lame ass hasn’t gotten any p*ssy since Big P*ssy was still alive on “The Sopranos”

Where do I stand in all of this? While I don’t think that women are inherently attracted to assholes per se, I do believe that many of the characteristics that turn women’s panties into Niagara Falls happen to be possessed in abundance by men who happen to be assholes.

I do not think this is a coincidence, though. Men (and women) who happen to be at the top of the food chain are given more asshole-leeway. A 10 can get away with more sh*t than a 7 can. Also, since they’re used to people treating them like they’re the sh*t, they possess less incentive not to be assholes.

It’s funny, though. A part of me wants to believe that not being as asshole is the way to go, but both anecdotal and observational evidence doesn’t agree with that. Even from my own personal experience, I’ve found that being me, but an aloof, distant, apathetic, and (somewhat) mysterious me does actually work better than being an open and, dare I say it, “nice” me.

Anyway, that’s enough from me today. People of VSB.com, how exactly do you feel about the theory that women are generally attracted to assholes? Also, which one of the eight are you?

—Damon Young (aka “The Champ”)