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Thursday Amusement: If You Don’t Know Me By Now.

We’re doing Thursday Amusement because Friday Fun is going to be insane tomorrow.  Kno’ dat.  I’ve been sitting on this idea for a good two weeks now.  The people will speak tomorrow!

There’s no reason for you to know this about me but I’m a huge University of Michigan fan. I remember getting shots at the Uof M hospital and they used to give me Snoopy band-aids afterwards.  I always wanted to go there for school and seriously contemplated going their for undergrad and later on down the line grad school.  I never made it to Michigan (not that I have any regrets, I am a very smart brotha after all, my alma mater will whip your alma mater’s a** 8 days a week, pal) but that doesn’t change the fact that…

…I could NEVER date a woman who went to or loved The Ohio State University.  What kind of pretentious f*ck school actually calls itself “The” and capitalizes the sh*t?

I mean seriously.

I know its kind of stupid, but it is what it is.  That rivalry is well recognized in the sporting world by all parties involved and basically f*ck Ohio State.

(Just to prove how insane my allegiance is to UofM, I dated a chick from Howard once, and they’re like Morehouse’s b*tch rival or something…except they’re not because they’re, ya know, Howard and we’re like, Morehouse.  Howard’s still cool though; they got a real bangin’ clock tower and everything!)

I have a cousin who goes to Michigan State right now and I’m conflicted about her decisions and the possible choices she may make in life, by the way.  I’ve expressed this concern to her.

Anywho, that got me to thinking about some quirky deal breakers.  I remember when we had our little tete-a-tete about dealbreakers, everybody listed things that they just couldn’t deal with, but really, those were quite sensical.  Somehow, “sensical” isn’t showing up as a real word, despite “nonsensical” being a word.  I’m truly perplexed by this.

Here is a list of other things that I know off top that are slightly-left-of-center as dealbreakers:

-    If a chick told me Halle Berry wasn’t pretty, I’d have to let her go.  Why?  Because she’s clearly blind and my vision’s already bad enough.  We’d f*ck around and make a baby that’d need LASIK before it was actually birthed.  Dump.Ed.
-    If a chick didn’t like Hurly Burly Coming To America, well, Loc’em And Smoke’em.  As perfect as this movie is, any woman who didn’t like this movie clearly hates being Black.  And I can’t date clear women.  For one, I’d have to throw water on her just to see her on some Hollow Man ish.  And that just seems like too much work to do on the regular.  Plus, she’d mess up my couch.  It may be IKEA, but it wasn’t cheap.  AND I put it together myself.
-    I SERIOUSLY wouldn’t even consider dating a chick who threw a piss fit about going to McDonalds TGIFridays.  I love that place.  I’m not even sure why but I do.  It’s fine American dining at a reasonable price.  Plus it has the word Friday in its title and who doesn’t love Fridays?  I ask you, who?
-    No love for Donny Hathaway?  Well you might as well one hug yourself darlin’, because upon hearing that, you’re outta there like the Chicago Cubs.

These are definitely quirky deal breakers for me.  They may seem petty to some degree, however, I just can’t comprehend some things in life.  Forget politics, if you are on some Ohio State sh*t, you got to go.

So toss your dealbreakers people, we’ve been there and done that.  What are those things pacifically specific to you that may not make sense to anybody else that would cause you to have to chuck the knucklehead, even if you seen him yesterday and he was cool?  (Name that Artist/song/album?)

And be honest; if you couldn’t date a man who wore speedos socks or a woman who only wore chaps granny panties, its okay, we won’t judge.

(Actually I will promise I won’t.)

-VSB P aka TANGLE JIG P aka THE ARSONIST aka MR. MACHOSANCHIL

PS Beyonce’s new single “If I Were A Boy” (tagged) is that hot fiyah – Dylan style!  I love that doggone song.  It’s great.  I don’t like “Single Ladies (Put A Ring On It)” as much, but hey, to each his own. And coincidentally, Christina Milian’s new song “Us Against The World” is that dopeness too.  No, for real!  I love pop music and pop music never had it so good.  “Together Forever” anyone?  You should check these songs out if you get the opportunity!  Eff it, I’m including the download links.  Don’t say I never gave you anything.

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Damon Young

Panama Jackson is pretty fly for a light guy. He used to ship his frito to Tito in the District, but shipping prices increased so he moved there to save money. When he's not saving humanity with his words or making music with his mouth, you can find him at your mama's mama's house drinking her fine liquors. Most importantly, he believes the children are our future.

  • http://liffy.blogspot.com Luvvie

    “Don’t say I never gave you anything.”

    Coincidentally, same thing Champ told the girl he gave “vajayjay pimples” to.

    Zing!! Huzzah!!

    Hehe see ya all in the morn!!

    • Nicki Sunshine

      Thanks for starting my morining off with a laugh!!!!!

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

      this made me choke on my toast. good job

  • http://kamakula.wordpress.com kamakula

    Wow, three posts in a row that I can’t really comment on.

    Thanks a lot VSB.

    • 8th Wonder

      Come on, that can’t be true…EVERYONE has some silly non-negotiable that really shouldn’t matter but it does.

      Spill it, babe.

      • http://kamakula.wordpress.com kamakula

        Only thing I can think of is that I couldn’t date a girl who believed in the fairytale romantic view of relationships but I could go for the one with the romance novel view.

        • 8th Wonder

          What’s the diff?

          • http://kamakula.wordpress.com kamakula

            fairy-tale = some guy will come by, sweep you off your feet, things will be great, happy ever after. (note, almost no s3x is involved).

            romance novel = beautiful successful independent woman is somehow still single, runs into a great handsome guy (me), has mindblowing s3x, they argue over guy’s ex, have mindblowing s3x then split up, she finds out it was all a mistake, have mindblowing s3x then get back together, someone tries to destroy man’s business/life, they’re escaping on a place, ensure nobody else will ever join the mile-high club, defeat the hater while staying within the limits of the law, finish it off with a bit of mindblowing s3x and happily ever after.

            I think you can figure out the part I like. . .

            btw, you wouldn’t happen to be a beautiful, independent, smart, successful woman would you?

            • 8th Wonder

              “btw, you wouldn’t happen to be a beautiful, independent, smart, successful woman would you?”

              I am, indeed. And lol @ that synopsis, that was pretty accurate.

              Not that I read romance novels.

              *cough*

        • Intellectual Hedonist

          so does that mean you started dating men?

          “I couldn’t date a girl who believed in the fairytale romantic view of relationships”

          for the record I blame Disney and Jim Jones

          • http://kamakula.wordpress.com kamakula

            apparently, it means i don’t date that much

            • Intellectual Hedonist

              how’s the car? I haven’t read the blog in a minute. I should go visit. I’ll be back

              • http://kamakula.wordpress.com kamakula

                lol I knew I should have written about sex in cars … then you’d be reading every … wait, you don’t read romance novels do you?

              • Intellectual Hedonist

                lately the only thing I have been reading are my students poorly written papers. I will read anything really, I’m not a literary snob. What you got?

              • http://kamakula.wordpress.com kamakula

                I’ve got Euler-Lagrange equations, Navanlinna-Pick problems, and Horne normal clauses in first order logic. Wanna trade?

              • Intellectual Hedonist

                I think I will keep my leadership theory papers thanks though, I appreciate you wanting to share

    • miss t-lee

      LOL!!!!

  • http://myspace.com/shatani shatani

    i could never date a yankees fan…not seriously. its that deep.

    go red sox!

    • http://yousmelllikenj.blogspot.com J.R. Bernard

      I would never date a Red Sox fan. or Duke fan. or Patriots fan. or Tennessee fan (I particularly despise Pat Summit).

      • Peyso

        I couldn’t date a Princeton student/alumn or fan

        • http://lostwomanchild.blogspot.com blackberry molasses

          I didn’t go to school there, but why not? Is it because their entire graduation ceremony is in latin? (pretentious a$$holes)

          • Peyso

            They also say that if u go to another Ivy its b/c you didnt get into Princeton

            • http://yousmelllikenj.blogspot.com J.R. Bernard

              Sidenote, but there are plenty of dumb people that go to Ivy’s, jsut as any other college institution. I know plenty, as I frequent several of them for different reasons.

              And the Military Academy’s are much harder to gain acceptance into than any Ivy….. USNA, Westpoint, and USAFA, and to a saller extenet, the USMMA and USCGA.

            • http://lostwomanchild.blogspot.com/ blackberry molasses

              truedat. those pricks can go kick rocks.

              JR i agree with you. there were many dumb f**ks at my school… trust fund babies and senator/CEO’s kids

            • Peyso

              I will cosign, give me a chick that is good at the 3 R’s (Reading, ‘Riting and ‘Rithmetic) from the Borough of Manhattan Community College with common sense anyday

          • V Renee

            hehehe. I took Latin for 5 years.

      • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

        “…or Tennessee fan (I particularly despise Pat Summit).”

        you do know who our favorite cp3 is, right?

        • http://myspace.com/shatani shatani

          my question is, who are the other cp3′s??

          • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

            Chris Paul from the New Orleans Hornets.

            • http://graywords1000@yahoo.com Dorian G.

              I can’t date anyone that doesn’t know that

              • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

                LMAO. well played.

          • http://yousmelllikenj.blogspot.com J.R. Bernard

            don’t respect anyone that has the audacity to date shelden williams… and thats besides the fact he played for Duke

        • http://yousmelllikenj.blogspot.com J.R. Bernard

          and her dunks have about as much authority as something Richard Jefferson would do.

      • http://igville.blogspot.com Luvvie

        Tennessee is one of the best basketball legacies, dynasties, and overall awesomest EVER. They are ridiculously dominant.

        Candace Parker is a beast (although I want to pull her aside and tell her that her love of prostyl gel and 2 inch “baby hair” is a bit ridiculous). And yes, Pat Summitt would scare me if I was stuck alone in an elevator with her. I may get off a floor or two earlier than I had initially planned to.

        • http://yousmelllikenj.blogspot.com J.R. Bernard

          Well besides the fact she wasn’t truthful enough to have admitted that the Rutgers team got screwed when they played Tennessee in sp08 (the ‘clock issue’), she tried to snitch on UConn for some silly BS out of spite. Wasn’t even enough of a woman to explain why she ended the UConn-Tennessee series.

          And most of her dominance was when competition was about as high as what the Trinity College baseball team faced this past yr (Division III). She still is a great coach, but her win totals and championship numbers are a bit inflated because of this fact.

          • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

            And most of her dominance was when competition was about as high as what the Trinity College baseball team faced this past yr (Division III). She still is a great coach, but her win totals and championship numbers are a bit inflated because of this fact.

            damn, lol. someone has an ax to grind

            • http://yousmelllikenj.blogspot.com J.R. Bernard

              as far as i’m concerned, she can go suck on Hattori Hanzo steel.*Kill Bill reference*

          • Gem of the Ocean

            if this was said with the sort of authority i read with in my head, it’d be a sexy rant.

      • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

        i’m a Duke fan and i’ve had a chick look at me in disgust upon finding out this fact. she couldn’t even tell me where Duke was. no lie. she just knew she hated Duke.

        my guitar gently weeps.

        • http://graywords1000@yahoo.com Dorian G.

          Wait you’re a Michigan and a Duke fan? Whats next you like the Red Sox too?

          I never thought Panama Jackson was actually – Panameous Garfield Xavier Jackson IV

          • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

            actually, as per above, i huckin’ fate the Red Sox.

            and naw son, this is G. Digital Jackson Tickle aka Tangle Jig P…straight gangsta…

            • http://www.new.facebook.com/profile.php?id=747670340&ref=name PBG

              Tangle Jig P. is a hot azz Palin name. Engine Nighthawk ain’t bad, but that Tangle Jig…that’s what’s hot on the boulevard.

              • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

                i know right. i love that name. i can honestly say that most of the names that come out of name generators for me have been good names…

    • tatica

      Right with you on that. My other one: wannabe rapper. I just can’t be suportive of either lifestyle!

      • http://myspace.com/shatani shatani

        oh man! dont even get me started! i think you can wanna be a rapper up until 25 years old at the LATEST. after that, its tres pathetique!

        and as for sports…i would rather date a non-baseball fan than a die hard yankees fan. as for other sports, i generally root for the home team, but its really not that deep….

        • Leila

          “you can wanna be a rapper up until 25 years old at the LATEST. after that, its tres pathetique!”

          I concur! One of my girls is talking to a guy who’s 38 and trying to start a rap career. I clowned her for that one.

          • miss t-lee

            Is she dating that guy that Gabrielle Union’s character was dating in “Daddy’s Little Girls’?
            ::snicker::

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

      wow…an actual Black Red Sox fan…(i’m assuming you’re Black by the way).

      i didn’t like the Red Sox until i went to Boston when i determined that i HATED the Red Sox b/c of their fans.

      good luck this year though…except i’m a Dodgers fan and i hope Manny hits a series winning homerun in the 9th inning of game 7…

      you see me.

      • Gem of the Ocean

        yaaaaay for Dodgers fans!! *clap clap*

        • Ivy St.

          Let’s Go Sox… Why is EVERYONE hatin’ on Boston/ New England teams today? Can someone from the Bean cosign and cheer for our wonderful teams?!?!?

          • Gem of the Ocean

            i actually don’t hate the BoSox. my roommate is a huge fan, btw. but truth be told, i’m not a big baseball fan so there’s no real love or hate. but my daddy and older brother raised me to be a Dodger fan. *shurgs* what can i say?

          • Gem of the Ocean

            besides, i’m from SoCal. i can’t be on some NE bullsh*t.

    • Intellectual Hedonist

      i could never date a yankees fan…not seriously. its that deep.

      go red sox!

      AMEN!

    • https://twitter.com/malael malael aka bleek420

      being a yanks fan means i could never date a red sox fan. esp now. i would have to kick her out of my house all of the time

  • http://www.new.facebook.com/profile.php?id=747670340&ref=name PBG

    My daughter’s high school’s staff refers to the school like that : “The Great McKinley Technology High School”. No bull. Call up there and somebody will answer the phone like that.

    With that being said, the kids made “We put on fo’ McKinley” their school song this year. *sigh*

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

      seriously though, how much more entertaining would life be if people were forced to put realistic adjectives before their names when introducing themselves? who wouldnt love to meet a “aggressively mediocre kenny” or a “superb kim”?

      just me? ok. nevermind

      • http://igville.blogspot.com Luvvie

        Not just you, Champ. I’d FULLY enjoy that type of a world.

      • http://naturallyalise.blogspot.com Naturally Alise

        Gregarious Gay Gary, Nefarious Nympho Nate, & Mundane Mike…. it would have cut out on a lot of dating disasters if I could have gotten these descriptors from jump.

    • miss t-lee

      “With that being said, the kids made “We put on fo’ McKinley” their school song this year. *sigh”

      I wish we had a cool class song like this…we got stuck with the theme song from “Friends”

      • http://www.kindredsmile.blogspot.com KindredSmile

        Bwhahaha @ “We put on fo’ McKinley”. That’s both terrible and fantastic

        • http://www.new.facebook.com/profile.php?id=747670340&ref=name PBG

          Oh, they love it! Mainly because their school name is the only DC high school’s name that actually fits into the song. We spent a good 10 minutes going testing it out. Hilarious!

  • http://www.new.facebook.com/profile.php?id=747670340&ref=name PBG

    I can’t date a non-reader or a man w/bad taste in music. Or if he’s just a bamma in general. Those are definite deal-breakers.

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

      “I can’t date a non-reader”

      what if he was blind, and had to listen to his books? you know, october is national disability awareness month, right?

      • http://www.new.facebook.com/profile.php?id=747670340&ref=name PBG

        If he was “The One”, I’d be more than happy to read aloud to him. I’d do it for the rest of our days.

        October is also National Orgasm Month. What are you doing to commemorate that, Mister Champs??

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

      you know my general beef with folks determining that they can’t date somebody with bad taste in music? it’s so subjective. like what if you think good music is Britney Spears and Soulja Boy? and you don’t want to hear none of that preachy Marvin Gaye ish. i know somebody like this who has determined that it ain’t good if they dont hear it on the radio.

      or she’d tell me it wasn’t a hot song if she’s never heard it.

      these people make my spleen do jumping jacks.

      • miss t-lee

        “or she’d tell me it wasn’t a hot song if she’s never heard it. ”

        Oh wow.

      • http://www.new.facebook.com/profile.php?id=747670340&ref=name PBG

        they make your spleen do jumping jacks??

        they make my duodenum frown.
        good taste is relative, but stupid is NOT.

    • Intellectual Hedonist

      I can not date someone that is not open to different genres of music, like you think country sucks but you have never listened to it, or wont listen to classical or opera or in general know only about one genre of music and call yourself a lover of music. Go kick rocks

      • BBE

        @IH–I thought I was the only one who ever considered this a deal breaker. And have since I was 14. I hate for guys to tell me how much they love music but only listen to Rap and occasionally R&B.

        Aside from faux music lovers my dealer breakers include: Redskins fans (my pickins are slim out here in the DMV), those that don’t respect my Super Bowl Champ Giants, Red Sox fans, people that hate Duke for no damn reason at all, non readers (read a book m*fu**er!) and last but not least, dudes who own fly ass cars but live in an apartment or their mom’s basement. (House BEFORE car numnuts!)
        Oh and 1 more, dudes who have to hype up their school and look down on mine. Yeah you’ve got a fancy ass education but I’m still smarter than you! Kick rocks son!

  • http://topsistasites.gotop100.com/out.php?id=794 Naturally Alise

    Deal breakers for moi

    * Duke fans

    *Does not see why “The Wire” is “such big deal”

    * Drinks things such as Smirnoff ice, mike’s hard lemonade, wine coolers

    *owns a b!tch-esque dog (i.e. miniature anything)

    *scared of unicorns, griffins, or black squirrels

    • http://www.new.facebook.com/profile.php?id=747670340&ref=name PBG

      C’mon now! You have to stop mentioning black squirrels in the same context as your other mythical creatures…Black Squirrels are REAL! They live in my neighborhood and rap about lollipops and having money! Respect the Black Squirrel!

    • http://yousmelllikenj.blogspot.com J.R. Bernard

      Coach K is the devil and J.J Redick is/was his evil spawn.

      • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

        i’m a huge jj redick fan. well i was when he was at Duke. orlando? not so much.

        • http://naturallyalise.blogspot.com Naturally Alise

          jj reddick, booooooooooo

          • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

            and of course…

            boo deez.

    • http://www.sheliagoss.com/blog Shelia

      “*scared of unicorns, griffins, or black squirrels”

      lol. Me and squirrels don’t get along–black or otherwise.

      • Lil’T

        I’m with PBG, Alise – Black squirrels are gangsta. Don’t get knocked out with an acorn, homie. It’s hard in these trees.

        P.S. – in response to the black squirrels, I am now seeing deer traveling in packs of 5 or more. I coulda swore I saw some of them wearing little blue bandanas and making funny gestures with their hooves….

        • http://topsistasites.gotop100.com/out.php?id=794 Naturally Alise

          “It’s hard in these trees.”

          I think that just made my day!

        • overit

          Lil’T you aint lyin! This one deer was staring me down, I used to feel bad when they ran, but when he got gangsta like that..I was a bit unsettled, like, these deers gettin uppity? They are just biding their time yall.

        • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

          “P.S. – in response to the black squirrels, I am now seeing deer traveling in packs of 5 or more. I coulda swore I saw some of them wearing little blue bandanas and making funny gestures with their hooves….”

          LMAO.

          you know, there are WAY more deer in DC than people might realize. i’ve seen deer in inner city neighborhoods…consequently, they were probably the same deer you saw with blue bandanas, down Suitland Parkway and Stanton Road in SE.

          • http://www.new.facebook.com/profile.php?id=747670340&ref=name PBG

            OMG! What if the deer in DC wore the blue bandanas and the blacks squirrels wore the red ones?? Dayum! Gangsta, Gangstaaaa!!

            The rats could wear jogging suits like the mafioso. Then there would be a criminal trifecta in DC. Besides the executive, judicial and legislative branches.

            “I put on fo’ my city!”

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

      *Does not see why “The Wire” is “such big deal”

      yeah. to me, these people are on the same level as pedophiles.

      • http://treasureyourmind.blogspot.com/ Treasure

        That’s not fair…I’ve never watched the show…but not because I don’t want to or anything…I just always miss the start of a season of it and I refuse to catch the re-runs on BET for fear that they’ll cut out too much of “the good stuff”

        • Gem of the Ocean

          with netflix sending DVDs straight to your home, there’s NO excuse not to be in The Wire circle

    • Leila

      “owns a b!tch-esque dog (i.e. miniature anything)”

      I don’t know if it’s a west coast thing, but everyone here has little dogs. I almost stepped on one the other day when I was getting my mail. I’ve seen these big dudes with these tiny little dogs.

      • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

        um. they’re gay. not that there’s anything wrong with that.

    • http://sugahoney.blogspot.com suga

      “* Drinks things such as Smirnoff ice, mike’s hard lemonade, wine coolers”

      No Smirnoff Ice? Is this only for men because I swear I took a bottle of that stuff into the movies one night and had a grand ol time lmao Fell asleep within the first hour and laughed extremely loud at sh@t that wasnt funny, but still…it was a grand ol time.

  • shay-d-lady

    you don’t know who eddie caine is, you don’t know and love ball and g, you can’t play scrabble, or checkers, you don’t agree that michael jordan was the best bball player of all time and that joe montana was 100 times better than steve young, you have no rhythm

    • http://topsistasites.gotop100.com/out.php?id=794 Naturally Alise

      yes, scrabble is one of my pre-req’s too!!!

      • Lil’T

        say that after some nerd blows of s.e.x. to continue playing online scrabble. Some ish.

      • http://www.igville.blogspot.com V.E.G.

        He’d need to be willing to at least play Scrabble.

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

      that’s a good one…if you don’t know who Eddie King, Jr. is…

      i lost 5 bucks on this bet…but amazingly, his name was Eddie KING, Jr. He just said it like, Eddie Kaing, Jr.

      • http://sugahoney.blogspot.com suga

        “i lost 5 bucks on this bet…but amazingly, his name was Eddie KING, Jr. He just said it like, Eddie Kaing, Jr.”

        Panama, I coulda swore his name was Eddie Caine…not Eddie King…*side eye trembling AGAIN*

  • shay-d-lady

    yeah no bytch a.s.s dogs either, or be a wack a.s.s rapper/singer, don’t eat chicken ( I mean for real u don’t eat chicken? wtf?) grind your teeth and have huge sweat stains under your arms while wearing dress shirts

  • http://www.igville.blogspot.com V.E.G.

    In no particular order:

    *You don’t like reggae music

    *You claim to like reggae music but the only artist you can name is Sean Paul.

    *You say you like Sean Paul but you can only reference his overly-produced American stuff

    *You don’t like the Five Heartbeats, Dirty Dancing, Imitation of Life or Mahogany (ok…you have to at least sit through the last 3 without saying ish)

    *You own a miniature dog (real dogs are o.k.)

    *You hate/are afraid of cats

    *Your passport has no stamps

    *You don’t watch Monday night football/hate sports in general

    *You cannot engage in an intelligent discussion about politics

    *You don’t know anything about the crisis in Darfur or any other international news

    *You don’t know at least one bible verse

    *You judge me for my shoe shopping

    *You drink cheap a$$ beer because you like it

    *You’ve slept with a man

    • Coco Chic

      Your list is so on point.

      *co-sign*

    • http://adopefiend.com Dope Fiend

      “You’ve slept with a man”

      4serious!

      • miss t-lee

        Ain’t nothin’ more serious.

    • http://www.sheliagoss.com/blog Shelia

      “*You’ve slept with a man”

      Need to add that to the list. When he’s out with Bob, I shouldn’t have to worry about what him and Bob are doing behind closed doors.

    • http://www.thecomebackgirl.com The Comeback Girl

      “*Your passport has no stamps”

      yeah imma need at least one stamp (departure and arrival) in that book. if you carryin it around for extra id….well..um..thats …don’t do that.

    • Just Stop It

      *You hate/are afraid of cats

      But cats are so creepy! (shudders)

    • http://insidethemindofadeviant.wordpress.com Deviant

      u got alot of stuff on your list u call deal breakers. Cats do suck. Some of those things can be remedied (reggae ignorance and lack of passport stamps)

      • http://www.igville.blogspot.com V.E.G.

        Some aren’t deal breakers as much as things that cause me to give the side eye.

        Cats are cuddly. And don’t need to be walked.

    • Peyso

      Aint nothin wrong with no Natty Light or Keystone. The 2520s at my PWI done put me on to their exceptional qualities.

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

      *You drink cheap a$$ beer because you like it

      so its better if they drink cheap beer because thats all they can afford?

      btw, i absolutely abhor beer in all its forms

      • miss t-lee

        I 2nd this…that ish is and will always be nasty as fcuk.

        • http://www.igville.blogspot.com V.E.G.

          If he doesn’t like beer that’s ok. But to be drinking Old E cuz you LIKE it???? Naw, son.

          I also dated a guy who ONLY drank white zin. He’d drink it in a pool hall. Get some likka, dude. lol.

      • Intellectual Hedonist

        Champ

        i too abhor beer and I absolutely love that you used the word abhor

      • http://lostwomanchild.blogspot.com blackberry molasses

        i used to abhor beer (love that word) until i discovered the joy that is Kirin Ichiban. Japanese beer rules.

        • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

          Konichiwa b*tches.

    • http://liffy.blogspot.com Luvvie

      Ummm this was the world’s longest list. So you need a sports fan who only likes expensive beers, loves to travel, loves reggae, likes cats (although they actually freak me out a lil)…

      Gurl… you doing the most. And if a man acutally LOVES Dirty Dancing, he probably has slept with other men.

      • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

        “And if a man acutally LOVES Dirty Dancing, he probably has slept with other men.”

        LMAO. word.life.

        • miss t-lee

          I think I’m the only girl who doesn’t like this movie.

          • http://lostwomanchild.blogspot.com/ blackberry molasses

            no. you’re not

          • http://www.new.facebook.com/profile.php?id=747670340&ref=name PBG

            you really aren’t.

      • http://www.kindredsmile.blogspot.com KindredSmile

        Mental pic of some tangy man crooning “iiiiiii haadddd the time of my liiiiifeeeee”

      • http://www.igville.blogspot.com V.E.G.

        Please note I said he had to at least sit through Dirty Dancing without cracking.

        And it would be nice if he’d want to do “the lift” during the big finale. Have yet to find anyone who wants to do that. Not a deal breaker though. lmao.

        • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

          you know, “the lift” should be used as a trust exercise,cuz somebody like me just might let you do an open dive onto the ground if you piss me off…

          • http://www.igville.blogspot.com V.E.G.

            Just wrong.

    • Intellectual Hedonist

      Jesus wept

      • Peyso

        My favorite Bible verse after “He Died”

    • http://sugahoney.blogspot.com suga

      “*You hate/are afraid of cats”

      That definitely deserves a terrorist fist bump. Any man who hates felines, or is allergic, need not apply.

      “*You’ve slept with a man”

      I’m allergic to men who have done this.

  • Coco Chic

    *Deal Breakers*

    1.) Non-reading mo fo’s. You claim to be a reader but there are no books in your house, only copies of jet, vibe, and XXL.

    2.) You are over 25 and are still wearing braids. (This is only acceptable if you are a rapper/producer/Sean Jean Model.)

    3.) You only listen to hip hop. (I love music and you can’t limit great music. I had one dude question my love of Coldplay and he got let go.)

    4.) Being a republican (I live in GA and I will kill myself if I see another McCain/Palin bumber sticker.)

    5.) If you have a dirty bathroom. ( I went to one dudes house and the bottom of the tub was dirt black. EWWW. Cleanliness is next to godliness. I ran out of that place.)

    • http://www.igville.blogspot.com V.E.G.

      “If you have a dirty bathroom. ( I went to one dudes house and the bottom of the tub was dirt black. EWWW. Cleanliness is next to godliness. I ran out of that place.)”

      OMG.

      • Coco Chic

        It was sooo nasty. I would not go near him after that. I did tell him about himself though. He tried to act hurt like I was being shallow. If you keep your tub dirty like that why would the rest of you be clean?

        • http://www.thecomebackgirl.com The Comeback Girl

          “If you keep your tub dirty like that why would the rest of you be clean?”

          Tina Turna chanting: “Nam Myoho Renge Kyo “!!!

          http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MOsr_ZOi-Jo

      • BK Dee

        Amen on the dirty bathroom. I once dated this guy who would use his sink and floor as an ashtray- cigarette buds everywhere and ash lining the sink… lets just say that was the last time I talked to him!

    • aja

      “a big sweet minty jesus AMEN!” to the dirty bathroom bizness! If I see hair on the sink..its a Wrap! *ewwwwwwwwww!*

    • Nicki Sunshine

      Hell yes to number 2!

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

      “I live in GA and I will kill myself if I see another McCain/Palin bumber sticker”

      you know, i still haven’t seen any of these. not one.

      • miss t-lee

        They’re running rampant here in TX…trust and believe. That’s why I have 3 Obama stickers and 1 Obama/Biden on my back window.

      • http://www.igville.blogspot.com V.E.G.

        When I made my summer rode trip to N.O. I started seeing McCain/Palin signs in Arkansas, along with “white women for Obama’ and “Stop Obama’.

      • http://lifeofaworkingmom.blogspot.com/ bballmom

        I saw a McCain/Palin sign in someone’s yard on the way to work this morning. I almost stopped to pull it out and stomp on it.

        No, no, I’m not biased.

        • http://lostwomanchild.blogspot.com/ blackberry molasses

          i yank em under the cover of darkness and run them over in the street in front of the offending house. they come out in the morning PISSED.

    • miss t-lee

      “5.) If you have a dirty bathroom. ( I went to one dudes house and the bottom of the tub was dirt black. EWWW. Cleanliness is next to godliness. I ran out of that place.)”

      How does the happen? I mean…he aint cleaned the tub since Clinton left office or something?
      Just nasty.

    • http://www.kindredsmile.blogspot.com KindredSmile

      A mudhole of a tub? Are you serious? I’m surprised he didn’t have some kind of funky rash…*dry heaves*

    • Gem of the Ocean

      “2.) You are over 25 and are still wearing braids. (This is only acceptable if you are a rapper/producer/Sean Jean Model.)”

      braids aren’t acceptable for ANY grown man in my book. and if you’re past the 30 mark, you should be shot.

    • angie

      that’s crazy…i live in california and I think I’ve only seen one…!