i realize most guys will call me nuts for publicly admitting this, and that there’s no bigger ego boost than getting propositioned by an attractive and sober woman.
i understand these sentiments, because i feel the exact same way, lol.
still, personal selfishness aside, i’ve always believed that women shouldn’t attempt to “bag” men, and i’ll give you four reasons why.
1. from a relationship standpoint, a woman making the first move usurps one of a mans most basic duties: to show a woman that he has enough balls to approach her
believe me, nothing takes more guts than a sincere cold, “i dig her, but i have absolutely no idea if she’s feeling me or not” approach. still, regardless of how shy or socially awkward he might be, stripping a man of this task subsequently strips a woman of one of natures inherent bitchassness filters. i mean, how the hell is he going to be able to protect you from lions and tigers and crackheads and sh*t if he wasn’t even able to muster a meek “hi” while in the meat line at giant eagle?
2. women don’t grow on us
***i spent at least 30 minutes trying to come up with a less blunt way of saying what i’m about to say. blame it on jim jones. and miss dominican republic in the miss universe pageant***
there’s no convo, cooking, or coitus invented yet that’s great enough to get a man to overlook lukewarm physical attraction to a woman. even if it had been, shaq would have stolen it already anyway.
women don’t grow on us, and there’s nothing a woman can do to “win” a guy, just lose. basically, if he wasn’t attracted enough to you to approach you first, he’ll never be attracted enough to you to do anything but close-bus you.
3. its not hot
an albino cockroach
the redheaded weekend barista at the crazy mocha down the street, who looks like a freckled white female version of jason whitlock.
pizza the hut
***these are the only things i could think of that are more unattractive than an perpetually thirsty and propositioning woman.***
4. it doesn’t work
i’ve been lucky enough to be around a couple dozen or so successful marriages, and i can’t name one where the man was blatantly bagged by the woman. i’m not saying it can’t happen, but like the existence of people who actually celebrate kwanzaa, i’ll believe it when i see it
now, i’m not saying women don’t have a part in this. just as it’s our job to approach if we’re interested, its their job to make themselves somewhat approachable.
smiling, eye contact, starting conversations, subtly making your relationship status clear, and responsive body language is perfectly within a women’s wheelhouse.
bagging him on the bus, making moves on your crush, and fed-exing a thong to his cubicle with a “digits, please. sexy-ass” note attached isn’t.
what say you, people of vsb? do you think a man should always instigate the approach? if so, why? if not, why not? does it even matter? why am i asking so many questions? if a barren womanist bagged a black blogger in the woods, would her roommate buy a round?