The World We Have Vs. The World We Want

Make no mistake, Geraldo is an idiot. To lay blame on “the hoodie” as being even one IOTA responsible for Trayvon Martin’s death (in context) is ethnically naive and lazy at best and irresponsible at worst. Even his own son has come out against his comments.

But being objective about it, I understand what he was getting at. He just got it wrong and shouldn’t have said it. Geraldo was clumsily talking about the age old debate about the world you have versus the one you want. And it’s a debate that each and every parent is faced with early on in the lives of their children.

See, the hoodie that Trayvon was wearing (and by default Trayvon, himself) is no more responsible for his death than the Arizona Ice Tea can that he had in his hand. The little bit that we do know implies that all fault lies entirely with George Zimmerman, who was a vigilante with a gun who thought he wielded power in a situation where he had none. Zimmerman made two mistakes that night. 1) He profiled a young Black man (not a crime); and 2) he killed a young Black man because of the profiling (an obvious crime). To pretend that the Black man piece of it isn’t the predominant part by blaming a hoodie is ignorance that only Gucci Mane could appreciate.

In that vein though, we’re going to focus on the first bullet.

H. Rap Brown once said that “violence is as American as cherry pie.” I’d like to add an addendum to that and say that “profiling is ALSO as American as cherry pie.” Everybody profiles. Each and every one of us do it. It’s a learned act. We take all of the various pieces of information that we’ve obtained over the course of our lives and judge everybody we see.

Black people are especially egregious when it comes to profiling. We do it to each other probably as much if not more than white people do it. The big difference? White people do it out of fear…many of us do it because we are preparing for what’s likely to go down. We just tend to know. When I was younger, my father used to tell me to always survey my surroundings and if I had the slightest inkling that something or somebody didn’t look right to get the f*ck out of dodge. Between that and “don’t get her pregnant”, my father thought he had my life covered. My father’s advice to me was to profile people. And then make a decision based on what you think you see. And ALWAYS err on the side of caution.

Because if I’m right, I’m right. But if I’m wrong, I could have been right, so I’m never wrong, just in case I was right. (Incidentally George Zimmerman proved this adage incorrect once you take it upon yourself to directly act out on your suspicions of wrong.)

As confusing as that statement is, that mental math is a calculation that many of us do on a daily basis. Which is what I think Geraldo was getting at in a weird and f*cked up way. See, in the world we live in, ninjas in hoodies, at night, tend to be ones that are out doing dirt. Right?

Wrong.

His problem, and the problem of so many individuals in authority is that they run with the idea that Black man in hoodie = potential criminal. The fact that anybody would suggest that minorities should stop wearing ANY clothing for which the power structure can misconstrue is a problem for me. All hoodies are not created equal apparently because you can’t tell me that a white dude rocking a Hollister hoodie looks like a potential criminal to law enforcement…except if you put a little liquor in him then he IS the scariest mofo ON THE PLANET.

It’s all about race. And Geraldo either doesn’t know, doesn’t show, or doesn’t care to accept this fact.

The world we have. In the world we have its not out of bounds for somebody to suggest that we, again, attempt to assimilate ourselves into the most plain Jane existence in order to not scare the living f*ck out of any white person who may end up killing us with the long arm of the law on his side. Because those poor white agressors/victims/individuals only know what they’ve seen on television, the negatives that are mostly self-inflicted. No wonder why we keep begging for positive images on television. We need to create a fantastical positive to balance out so much of the f*ck sh*t that we create in real life. Everybody who has been screaming about the need for concern over black-on-black crime is absolutely right. White man killing Black man can’t be where this ends.

In the world we want however, none of that should even matter. None of it. In the world most of us want we would never have to worry about our Black children NOT coming home because of any number of activities or what their wearing being the vital component of that which might render them dead. And death by police above all else. That’s white privilege that I’d love to experience.

I have a Black female friend who constantly leaves her laptop in the backseat of her car, fully exposed. Every time I question her about it she mentions that nobody will steal it because why would anybody steal her laptop. Basically, it’s hers and its in her car. Hers. I’m often baffled by this because, well, I’ve lived in the hood and I’ve had my sh*t taken. By my next door neighbor. To me, it seems like an inevitability. To her it seems inconceivable that anybody would steal her stuff. She lives in the world I want. I live in the world we have. And our mentalities cross paths without ever touching one another. Must be the power of positive thinking because she’s yet to be a victim (knocks on wood) and I’ve been victimized enough for three white people to film a viral video.

In the world that we want, George Zimmerman see’s a young Black man walking in a hoodie and it doesn’t necessarily signal to him that “somebody’s out of place”. But I hate to say that there’s a vast majority of us out here who, given certain circumstances, would make a similar judgement and that’s the most troubling part of it all. I’m proud that we’re all out here with our hoodies on calling for justice, I just hope that we remember that same lesson when we go to our respective homes and see somebody walking down our empty street in a hoodie.

I wonder if we’d all make the assumption that we are pissed that Zimmerman didn’t make…that he’s just somebody going somewhere, nothing more nothing less. And I don’t know how true that is. And that is very conflicting for me because if I’m the sum total of my experience, then chances are, I’m going to profile somebody tomorrow.

In the world I want, Trayvon Martin could have walked home without being hassled at all. In the world we have, that couldn’t happen. But not because Zimmerman profiled, but because he didn’t have the sense to NOT play God. It’s not out of bounds for somebody to see somebody they deem suspicious and call the police to have it checked out. Yeah we’d be mad for the profiling but no life would be lost.And it should stop there with more continued calls to end institutional profiling.

I’ll never tell me daughter that she can’t wear something as to not scare or piss of white people. My father told me that once because of some clothes I was rocking and it offended me to no end. I should be able to wear what I want. And my father said, “should doesn’t have sh*t to do with anything.” His point? Life isn’t fair. For some of us, the world is against you from day one.

“Law isn’t necessarily justice.”

Imagine that.

So what world do you prepare your children for? And what world do you live in?

-VSB P aka THE ARSONIST aka MR. YES I’M WEARING THAT aka GIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIRL HE A 3

***On a lighter note: peep the Trailer for Madame Noire’s “Ask A Black Man” web-series where Panama Jackson is featured in two episodes. First episode debuts on March 28th!***

  • http://satcpsychology.wordpress.com MsVivienne

    “Law isn’t necessarily justice.”

    I tell this to my students at an alternative school daily. They have more to worry about to spend their days before 7:40am fighting each other.

  • http://www.singleblackmale.org/author/themostinterestingmanintheworld/ Most

    What if Geraldo said this: “Michele got raped by a jerk with a gun but parents have to drill into their daughters heads: a short skirt is like a sign that says come and rape me. Her short skirt was as much the cause of her rape as the rapist.” Doesn’t play as well does it?

    In no other area of criminal activity is the victim blamed more than when a black man is killed by someone who isn’t also black. From Trayvon to Oscar Grant, to Amadou Diallo, all the way back to Emmit Till, anytime a black man gets killed we always question what he did to get himself killed. It’s indicative of some of the worst parts of our world.

    Victim blaming is never ok because it’s a ridiculously slippery slope. I was happy to see that the general response to Geraldo’s comments (outside of folks like O’Rielly cosigning) was one of disdain almost to the point of humor.

    • http://www.shardesaidwhat.blogspot.com ShardeMarie

      They blame girls for their cloting in rape cases all the time. Their clothes, their “friendliness,” the way they were dancing, their alcohol intake. Everything. America doesn’t care for women much either.

      • http://Thisistip.wordpress.com Thisistip

        I’d agree with Sharde, victim blaming isn’t rare to minorities or women. What a joy that I’m both.

      • http://pinchmycheekie.wordpress.com Cheekie

        Right. It’s still done in volumes just like this is done. And in a patriarchal society, there’s not much done about it. You may hear dissent but it’s usually from those that are the likeness of the victims, just like this case here. They are far more similar than you think.

      • Leila

        Sad, but true. I don’t understand why it’s the victim that is often blamed in rape trials and not the person who caused the crime…..I just left a job where many men at the top were blatantly harassing the women, yet it was often the women who were attacked (for being friendly, clothing, etc…).

    • http://moacn.wordpress.com Sir Fariku

      Victim blaming is intellectual laziness, it is showing that you are unwilling to fully analyze a situation and would rather chose a simplistic solution like rubbing cough syrup on a tumor, victim blaming never solves anything. I was mad at Geraldo and also felt embarrassed for him. How can a grown human being say that bull? Smh.

      • Deeds

        +1

      • http://wildcougarconfessions.com Wild Cougar

        Intellectual laziness, indeed. The type that makes people feel smart. So it gets consigned often. You see it everywhere. No need to actually look at the complex facts. Just jump right to the end of the story with a finger wag. Say shoulda aaaand you’re done. Looking smart and knowing it could never happen to you.

        Yep, nothing more satisfying than.victim blaming. Except you get an ever increasing list of things you can’t do, or else. And you become a prisoner of your own wagging finger. Or a total hypocrite.

      • Tiffany

        +2

        I’d also like to add that in a way victim blaming gives people a false sense of security. If someone can say “she wore a short skirt” or he “wore a hoodie” and that’s why this crime happened to them, then all I have to do is avoid wearing or doing something and I won’t become a victim of said crime. It’s complete bullsh*t, but it makes others feel safe in a world that can be dangerously unsafe often times.

        • A Woman’s Eyes

          Very astute take on the victim blaming phenomena, Tiffany & Wild Cougar.

    • http://asiyah3.wordpress.com Asiyah

      Most and ShardeMarie brought up excellent points.

      • Justmetheguy

        +5 (or whatever # I am now) This victim blaming is ALL the way out of control now. It’s like a reflex at this point, but as someone mentioned upthread, it allows people to seem like they’re taking everything into account (“I’m just bein objective) when in reality they’re just subtly justifying the perpetrator’s actions with their intellectual laziness. It’s ruining our society and we gotta stop it now! Starting with ourselves. I’ve found myself doing it in the past, but I’ve made it a point to dead that sh*t. I’m now much better about calling myself on it and reversing the impulse to victim blame. The world only gets worst when people do that.

        I’d also like to add that YES profiling is even more American than apple pie, because my response when I first heard the story and saw his picture was that “he doesn’t look threatening at all!” I even said (tongue in cheek) that “it aint like he was dark skinned wit dreads and dark lips or a a big 6’5 security guard lookin ninja”….There are different levels of profiling, but we all do it. (and joke about it) Most of us with any type of sense just don’t stalk and kill someone due to our prejudice though. I swear this case made me believe that the movie Crash actually was realistic. There really are some extremely aggressive idiots out there that’ll allow themselves to get just that caught up in the moment that they’d make justifying the crime extremely difficult for their defenders smdh

    • http://www.ifiruled2011.wordpress.com Mahogany Princess

      Well said! I agree with you 100%. They’ve been having a field day doing just that today yet Zimmerman remains a free man and a mother is still left to grieve her son while now trying to keep his reputation in tact! These muthaf***** just won’t quit!

  • kenyantweep

    only God can fight for us now…

    • http://www.ifiruled2011.wordpress.com Mahogany Princess

      Prayer without work is dead. We’ve got work to do.

  • Meisarebel

    I especially enjoy the “should doesn’t have sh*t to do with anything” part. When I was first leaving home to come to America for university, my mother sat me down and pretty much told me the same thing. Not to get any girl pregnant (because they will probably think they can trap some poor West Indian boy or make me think they can get me citizenship, right… Crazy) and to be careful of being, well, profiled. And my naive self couldn’t fathom it. Why would I be judged as a “typical black American” when I’m not American. Then I got to college and it clicked. I’m black. The end.

    • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M5FR1LGsT7E TheAnti-Cool

      If more folks realized that in the end we are all black, no matter the hue or the homeland, we might be able to come together and stand against the bullsht we are constantly subjected to.

      • A Woman’s Eyes

        If we value Black life and value ourselves, we are more likely to get angry and literally grab Zimmerman and bring him to the police under citizen’s arrest. If we value ourselves, we would not be content with sitting in a state of feeling powerless.

      • Justmetheguy

        ” If more folks realized that in the end we are all black, no matter the hue or the homeland, we might be able to come together and stand against the bullsht we are constantly subjected to.”

        + Muthaf*ckin 1! When black folks of different ehnicity/nationality start with that divisiveness and sh*t I get pissed off, but not because im offended or they hurt my feelings. I’m pissed because they hurt my future, their future, and the futures of our kids. We’d be so powerful if we united on civil rights and economic matters, but we’re mostly too blinded by either pride or ignorance smh

        • http://www.ifiruled2011.wordpress.com Mahogany Princess

          “When black folks of different ehnicity/nationality start with that divisiveness and sh*t I get pissed off, but not because im offended or they hurt my feelings. I’m pissed because they hurt my future, their future, and the futures of our kids. We’d be so powerful if we united on civil rights and economic matters, but we’re mostly too blinded by either pride or ignorance smh”

          Say that!!!!

    • Keisha

      “I’m black. The end.”…..True!

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

      man that revelation is a motherf*cker ain’t it. how we look to ourselves versus how we’re perceived by others rarely ever jives.

      sure you shouldn’t have to just relegate yourself to one all encompassing term for your own safety and peace of mind, but if everybody else does, what do yo do?

      • A Woman’s Eyes

        That is why I totally get why we have Black gun-owners. I come from a long line of Black men whose response to a White man having the right to shoot a Black person dead and walk was to become gun owners. They knew the cost of defending themselves and were willing to take that responsibility–because they felt that a man isn’t a man if he cannot protect his family. They were not okay with sitting around feeling powerless during Jim Crow days and after Jim Crow was over. Those men were willing to die or go to jail for their right to protect themselves if anyone tried to take their life or a family member’s life.

        Yes guns and people with them kill. Yes guns are awful. Yet I understand that when people feel they are not safe, and the police will not keep them safe, they may take their own self-protection in their own hands. If I lived in Florida, I would use my right to bear arms to follow Florida laws and bear arms.

      • http://asiyah3.wordpress.com Asiyah

        “man that revelation is a motherf*cker ain’t it. how we look to ourselves versus how we’re perceived by others rarely ever jives.”

        Yup. Depressed the hell out of me when I realized I will always be perceived as a maid with poor English-speaking skills. An illegal immigrant (even though I’m not one). A single mother at 14. A thief. Somebody who is overly sexual and not the least bit intelligent.

        As my “mentor” once told me when I was applying for my PhD, “let’s hope your race gets you in.”

        Yup.

      • esa

        sure you shouldn’t have to just relegate yourself to one all encompassing term for your own safety and peace of mind, but if everybody else does, what do yo do?

        ** don’t listen. don’t let them in. don’t let them win. destroy this lie. over and over again. on your terms. with every breath you take. whether you change anyone’s mind or not doesn’t matter. all that matters is you hold your ground no matter what.

        • Meisarebel

          Oh most definitely. The “revelation” came that I would be perceived that way no matter where I went. Until I opened my mouth that is, and people realised I was a “foreigner”, so to speak (no pun intended).

          Stereotypes are a b*tch. And I completely agree that we need to tear them down. I say that fully acknowledging that it’s a utopic statement that doesn’t quite fit into the world we live in right now.

  • http://delaneydiamond.com Delaney Diamond

    I think you hit the nail on the head. The profiling in and of itself is unnattractive. What you do about it is where the danger lies. We all have prejudices based on how people dress. That’s why you wear a suit to a job interview instead of jeans and a t-shirt. You’re trying to make a good impression.

    In the Trayvon case, this young man was profiled, and rather than LEAVE HIM ALONE, which is what Zimmerman should have done after he called 911 (and the dispatcher also told him not to follow), he did follow Trayvon, and now the question remains, what exactly happened once he caught up with him?

    Apparently, Zimmerman was hurt in a scuffle with Trayvon (I’ve heard broken nose and bruising…?). Which suggests that Trayvon was forced to defend himself. This child was fighting for his life. HE was the one who had true cause to take advantage of the Stand Your Ground law in Florida.

    The problem is, a gun beats skittles and iced tea every time.

  • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M5FR1LGsT7E TheAnti-Cool

    Another powerful post on Trayvon from the Very Smart Brothers. This is one of the things that really got me: To me, it seems like an inevitability. To her it seems inconceivable that anybody would steal her stuff. She lives in the world I want. I live in the world we have. And our mentalities cross paths without ever touching one another.

    I try to raise my boys for the world I want in hopes they will play a part in the change but I am forced to live in the world we have to try and keep them around long enough to do that. Trayvon has hammered home that I need to do more to be a part of that change and not depend on others to create the world we should all want.

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

      i cant tell you how many arguments I’ve gotten into with people, especially white people that i work with, about what does happen versus what should happen. and i always end up looking stupid b/c i know what should happen when i walk out the door but ive lived in a reality for too long to not be paranoid.

      what’s a black man without his paranoia? hell, sometimes i think paranoia is a black man’s best weapon for survival.

      • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M5FR1LGsT7E TheAnti-Cool

        “hell, sometimes i think paranoia is a black man’s best weapon for survival.”

        True and terribly sad.

      • http://wildcougarconfessions.com Wild Cougar

        I’m gonna have to disagree with you. Im like your friend. I prefer to remain blissfully unaware. I’ll take basic precautions. Very basic. But I will stop short of inconveniencing myself for the sake of avoiding a hypothetical danger.

        Why? I HATE fear. More than death, poverty, injustice, and all other forms not evil. Because fear is the worst form of evil. It imprisons you and you are your own warden. You won’t do things you want to do, need to do because of hypothetical danger. You life will be stunted. And that’s the biggest tragedy. A wasted life. I’d rather be victimized than waste time on fear.

        • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

          i can’t afford to be blissfully unaware. i can’t afford to live in a place where i’m generally surprised that crime goes down. i cant wait until i do though.

          • http://twitter.com/#!/NewYork2VA NY2VA

            They’ll blame your black a$$ when it does happen.

        • Meisarebel

          I might be nitpickibg at semantics, but I welcome fear. Makes you think twice in a lot of situations instead of blindly doing something you MAY regret. Granted, and to completely contradict myself, I try to embrace courage, which is overcoming said fear and doing what you believe in/want to.

          Fearlessness, in my opinion, is the equivalent of carelessness.

        • rnic

          I agree. I not only hate, but flat out REFUSE to live in fear, paranoia, etc. because I just don’t, and never have, lived my life that way, regardless of my surroundings (which have varied greatly from hood, to hood rich, to places where you say “hood” and they say “do you mean like a car hood?.”) I never proclaimed that this was the smartest, most realistic or safest way to live either though. Nor do I side-eye those who choose to live super cautiously. I’ve just always asserted that I don’t live that way and I have no desire to. To that point, though, I also have no children at present, and I’m positive that my care-free, fear-free attitude will change immediately when I even so much as learn that I will have a child. I believe that children make us vividly aware of the world the way that it actually is because we so strongly desire to first create for them the world the way that we want it to be, while gradually exposing them to/educating them on the realities at a pace that we see fit as parents, even if they only get to see it that way for the 18 years that they are under our wing.

          So I guess, to answer the post question, 98% of the time, I live in the word that we want while remaining aware of the world as it is, just not enough to have it alter my lifestyle…………..for now.

          • rnic

            I also resent the notion that to not live with the utmost caution = to be dumb, or to not have experienced unfortunate situations. It’s really a choice, for me anyway, and not a floosie-inspired way of life that I fell into. I, like many people, have experienced things that probably should have resulted in me altering my lifestyle to be overly cautious and borderline paranoid…..but that just wasn’t my takeaway. The way I see it, MOST things could’ve always turned out worse, and I’m blessed that they didn’t. So while I may have learned from what I have experienced and even become a little more cautious, it’s still not a big part of my life.

            • Meisarebel

              I feel that. I applaud that too.

              But…

              As I said, semantics. I try never to be determinate, so to say “I live without fear!” sounds silly to me. No offense.

      • esa

        “he who sees through all fear will always be safe” —lao tsu

        is it possible to be fearless? is it possible to look at anyone without falling victim to their projection of fear ? is it possible to see that fearlessness inspires respect because everyone aspires to this ?

        i’ve been horribly afraid of men my whole life. horribly. i was that girl who got comments but couldn’t say thank you. i wasnt a b*tch, i was fuuuhkt up. i took compliments as aggression. and i completely shut down. until something happened recently, and now, i make eye contact and smile and say thank you and one man even went so far as to thank me for accepting his compliment, because clearly, that was rare.

        that made me think, fear is the wall behind which we imprison ourselves. undoubtedly, there are men with issues about women, but how much did my fear play into their own ? did me acting like a “b*tch” make them hate women all the more ?

        undoubtedly, hatred is a constant. but i believe that it isn’t an absolute. i believe it is born of fear, and that paranoia fans the flames. i believe there is a way to diffuse hatred, and it begins with changing your own mind.

        • http://overthestory.blogspot.com Angie G.

          Very well stated! The “problem” here is that folks are not likely to to agree with this perspective. Why? They need evidence FIRST before they can believe. But the “gotcha” is that we will never see evidence as long as we do not believe…….. Panama made a key observation about this (using his friend who leaves her laptop in plain view and it not being stolen as an example). So hard to swallow that it could be that simple, and so, we will continue to look for answers and feel frustrated that there is no resolution.

      • http://www.ifiruled2011.wordpress.com Mahogany Princess

        “what’s a black man without his paranoia? hell, sometimes i think paranoia is a black man’s best weapon for survival.”

        I used to always get made with my ex because he was so paranoid but I grew to understand it more and more. I think the statement you made is true and applies to most black men.

    • nillalatte

      “To me, it seems like an inevitability. To her it seems inconceivable that anybody would steal her stuff.”

      Yeah, when I read that I thought.. idiot! That is someone right there that has lead a sheltered life and has no idea about the world they live in. They think they are untouchable, but they are so wrong. They are also the ones that when something bad does happen to them they end up in years of therapy trying to psychologically cope with reality. My motto is don’t leave anything out. What they can’t see they won’t steal (talking about in my car).

      • http://wildcougarconfessions.com Wild Cougar

        No, they won’t be in therapy. They’ll say Damn! That really sucks. Guess I better get a new laptop. Maybe stick it under the seat this time. They (we) are aware theft happens. We just choose to ignore it because living in fear is unpleasant. More unpleasant than theft.

        • Justmetheguy

          Yeah, but fear and caution are not the same thing. Taking necessary steps to decrease the likelihood of theft isn’t the same thing as fear of theft.

          • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M5FR1LGsT7E TheAnti-Cool

            Exactly.

          • Ms. Bridget

            Thank you! The idea that safe guarding my possessions=fear didn’t sit well with me. It’s caution, not fear.

          • NYCgyal

            Yup, this. I don’t buy things I can’t afford to replace, so I’m not “afraid” of people stealing from me. That doesn’t mean I’ll just leave my stuff lying about for them to take it, though.

  • Cheech

    I will prepare my kids for the world we actually live in because the fact of the matter is my kids will be black so they will be judged and watched more carefully than if they were white. I was taught by my dad to watch my surroundings, the people watching me and to know the area. I know where every cop checkpoint is when heading back to my house at night and I let someone know via text the route im taking as well as the amount of time it should take. It has gotten to the point where I cannot be surprised by what happens in this world so I prepare as best as I can and pray it is not my unlucky day.

    I also agree with Most on his post. I don’t understand why Geraldo felt that it was even appropriate to suggest that it was Trayvon’s fault by dressing the way he did. I wear hoodies a lot especially when walking to a 7-11 and I feel that I should be able to dress as comfortably as I want given how many people I’ve seen show up to even bigger stores in pajamas. As much as one thinks that a black man in a hoodie is a criminal, there is a good chance he is just a guy trying to be comfortable. Can we get the benefit of the doubt?

    • http://pervertedalchemist.blogspot.com/ Perverted Alchemist

      As long as there’s White people, there is no such thing as the benefit of the doubt…

      • Meisarebel

        To play devil’s advocate, not all white people can be blamed. They deserve the benefit of the doubt too, otherwise it’ll be a perpetual vicious cycle of hate and distrust.

        Shrug. Just sayin.

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

      i think thats the interesting piece. hoodies really are just every apparel.

      what annoys me about this focus on the hoodie, and even God forgive me the Hoodie marches, is that it obscures the larger point that this had sh*t to do with a hoodie. one of the few times in my life i found myself agreeing with Al Sharpton. this hoodie focus places whites and black son a level playing field for justice. so now you have loads of white people, graciously, rocking hoodies to make a point when they’ll rarely ever look as threatening. the perception is the problem and i’m wondernig what we can actually do to change that.

      • nillalatte

        “the perception is the problem and i’m wondernig what we can actually do to change that.”

        Collectively and over all… unfortunately nothing. Not every black or white person out there are good people. We know this. I’ve been the target of mean muggin’ by black folks that had preconceived notions of who I am as a person. And, by the same token, I’ve probably looked side eyed at a few black folks who didn’t present themselves properly. It comes down to individuals and content of character IMHO.

  • Leila

    Blaming the hoodie? Is Geraldo gonna blame the hijab for the Muslim woman who got beaten to death over the weekend in San Diego by a racist? I’m tired of people blaming the victim and not the person who actually committed the crime.

    • http://pervertedalchemist.blogspot.com/ Perverted Alchemist

      Bill O’Reilly beat him to it several years ago.

    • http://asiyah3.wordpress.com Asiyah

      “Is Geraldo gonna blame the hijab for the Muslim woman who got beaten to death over the weekend in San Diego by a racist?”

      Yes he is. Oh and her religion, of course.

    • http://asiyah3.wordpress.com Asiyah

      They’re actually planning a Million Hijabi March for the Muslim woman who was beaten almost to death in El Cajon, CA over the weekend. It was inspired by the Million Hoodie March.

  • That Ugly Kid

    Maybe it’s me then. But I NEVER, judge someone on appearance (with one excpetion). I judge them based on their actions. If I see a group of black men standing outside a liquor store, being loud and obnoxious, I’m going to be wary of them. Not because of what they are wearing, but because of how they are acting. Replace them with a group of white boys doing the same thing and my response would be the same. As explained in a previous thread, I love hoodies. I have various Rocawear hoodies and if it’s chilly out, best believe I’m wearing one.

    The one exception, is elderly white people. Why? Because white who are 60+ years old were born and lived during a time where being racist was no big deal. In fact, it was frowned upon if you WEREN’T racist. Combine that thinking with the negative imagery of blacks today, and they possible tell themselves they were right about “us” the entire time. Which would explain why elderly white people tend to act snarky towards me. They’ve already profiled me before I even spoke.

    • That Ugly Kid

      possibly*

    • CurlyTop

      +1
      A persons actions tells me a lot in addition to the loud azz non-whisper many people to speak in nowadays. Idgaf what a person looks like but off behavior signals my spidey senses.

    • erika

      “If I see a group of black men standing outside a liquor store, being loud and obnoxious, I’m going to be wary of them. Not because of what they are wearing, but because of how they are acting. Replace them with a group of white boys doing the same thing and my response would be the same. ”

      Yes!

    • http://Thisistip.wordpress.com Thisistip

      I believe I profile in the same way. It’s more about the way you’re acting than what you look like. Many a white man has scared me while I’m walking around, heck some women too. H

      • http://www.styleillusions.com WIP

        I remember being a lakeside park. It was hot, people were jogging around the like. One white dude was dressed in all black with a back pack walking around the lake….”WTF?” Also working at Walmart while I was in school, I dealt with all kind of thieves and the majority of them were pale. I don’t put criminality past anybody.

        • nillalatte

          Your park story made me think of this time I was in the park and waiting on friends to arrive. Cell phones weren’t prevalent back then so I walked to a pay phone (remember those?… lol) and called one of my friends. This white dude started walking toward me looking all crazy and here I am caught up in a phone booth. I hung up, got out and started walking back toward the park looking down and over my shoulder. This mofo started running toward me! I used to carry a pocket knife and thought it was in my pocket. I spun around, stuck my hand in my pocket and grabbed LINT!!! lol But, my defensive action made dude stop dead in his tracks. He looked at me like “what the hell is in her pocket?” and he apparently changed his mind about whatever he thought he was gonna do to me.

          • Mena

            Where in the world did you live back in the day? Your stories are killing me. First the dude rolling up on your car and now a dude running at you at the park!?!

    • Deeds

      Too bad most people don’t think like that. I remember watching the show What Would You Do. They had black and white kids vandalizing a car and then waited to see what the response would be. The 911 calls and confrontation was overwhelming more with the black kids than the white. There were only a few calls for the white kids. Not only that but when the white kids were doing the experiment of vandalizing the car, the black kids and their family were sleeping in a car nearby and the black people got the police called on them when they weren’t doing anything.

      • That Ugly Kid

        I think I remember that show. If I recall correctly there was an episode where both a white and a black teenager, were attempting to steal a bike (not at the same time, of course) that was locked to a post in a public park. They were both dressed the same. When the black kid attempted this, he was confronted alot more than the white kid. Which was pretty easy considering the white kid didn’t get confronted AT ALL. In fact, some people saw the white kid trying to steal the bike and automatically assumed the white kid OWNED the bike, and that he was breaking into it because he’d lost the key.

        One guy actually helped the white kid break the bike chain so he could steal it, because he assumed the bike belonged to him. I saw this video years ago so the details might be sketchy, but that’s the gist of it anyway.

        • http://www.styleillusions.com WIP

          It was “What Would You Do.” i don’t watch anymore because most of the scenarios are stupid, but that one was very revealing. They had another episode where they had white kids and black kids vandalizing a car to see how people reacted. They were surprised that people ended up calling the police on the black actors who were sitting in their car waiting on their turn instead of the white kids vandalizing the car.

          • http://www.styleillusions.com WIP

            Well I damn near repeated Deeds’ comment word for word. Guess I’ll start reading down from now on…

        • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

          real talk…Television shows that DIRECTLY pit white versus Black would likely to more to help people understand how real perception is than anything.

          I thought that the show Black.White. produced by Ice Cube would have done that but it didn’t. But you almost have to CREATE scenarios where folks would likely act and change the participants and watch the reactions. That’s some research and study I would get behind 100 percent.

      • http://vanityinperil.com Vanity in Peril

        I saw that one as well as the one where the white kid/black kid are trying to steal a bike. I knew what the outcome was going to be but it still wrecked me. I try and stay away from that show because it seems like more white privilege self-congratulatory back-patting for people who if put in those same situations would not do the right thing. White people are afforded the opportunity to live in the “World we want” as P stated above. We don’t get those opportunities.

      • nillalatte

        They also had one in which a little white girl was supposedly being kidnapped. Most people walked on. Two black men, however, surveyed the situation, dropped their bags and charged at the white man who was supposedly kidnapping the little girl. They only stopped when the security came running out of the store across the street. I was jumping up and down yelling, “Yeah! Only the black men stepped up! You go bwoy!!!” No one else was willing to get involved and most ignored the girls plea for help. It was really something.

    • Leila

      “Maybe it’s me then. But I NEVER, judge someone on appearance”

      Living in Seattle, I can honestly say that I feel comfortable anywhere I go and much less to judge based on appearance. When I used to live in NY/DC, I would be more wary if I saw a group of guys (of any race) only because I’m a female.

    • http://asiyah3.wordpress.com Asiyah

      I’m with That Ugly Kid (I don’t like calling you that, though! I’m sorry I called you ugly!). I’m more about actions than appearance.

    • http://www.ifiruled2011.wordpress.com Mahogany Princess

      I have to be honest, I don’t judge on apperance but I am cautious as a result of apperance. We’ve all been a bit more cautious when seeing a person who’s deemed “hood”. That’s an engrained fear and a defense mechanism that I think most have when being in certain neighborhoods or around certain people.
      I have the same hesitation when around a bald-headed white person that’s tatted up.

  • Iceprincess

    I just try to strike a balance. I tend to be cynical by nature, so i have to make a conscious decision to find positivity. Hope for the best, but be prepared for the worst. Thats what seems to work for me. Its hard to stay positive all the time with all the trayvon martin & kony situations of the world. You just have to give it to God. Let go & let Him.

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

      i’m sure there were a lot church services that had that same mentality yesterday.