*****8:00am edit: after seeing a few of the comments, for the sake of clarity i wanted to note that i’m NOT referring to “corny” and “cornball” in the goofy/silly/lighthearted context, but in the loser/lame/douchebag/a-hole/”you suck at life” context. carry on*****
pedophiles
fascists
terrorists
7th graders
native new yorkers
each of these people represent the torn 2-ply tissue on the hemorrhoid of the world’s ass. yet, in the champ’s mind, they’re each more reputable than the star of today’s entry, the cornball…the person who thinks and acts like their obnoxiously lecherous acts make them cooler than they really are.
with some help from our crack research team, we’ve managed to procure a copy of a very revealing corny manifesto, a document thats apparently passed out at their monthly meetings in harlem, and we’re publishing a portion of it today to school everyone to the true devious traits and nature of the corny muthaf*cker.
so, without further ado, here are the ten commandments of corny
1. thou shall repeatedly practice penetration deception
ah yes. nothing screams “i’m a f*cking cornball!!” louder than lying about who you have and haven’t slept with. guys, try your bestest to fabricate elaborate sexual stories about each of the chicks you’re hugged up with in a facebook pic. ladies, always remember that the tip doesnt count, and especially doesn’t count if he was lame, if you were tipsy, or if he played you.
2. thou shall incorporate each of these terms in your daily lexicon, and thee incorporation shall be unambiguously unironic: hate. “no homo”. pimp. gay. playa. fo shizzle.
3. thou shall have two different laughs: one for genuine feeling and one exaggerated laugh for when you think you’re the only one who “got” the joke
4. thou shall try thee hardest to use thy cell phone at the most inopportune times
make sure to have your phone attached to your ear while you’re waiting in line at starbucks, on the bus, in the club, or anywhere else where the noise level means you have absolutely no chance of hearing what the person on the other end is saying. in fact, make it so inopportune that the people surrounding you are simultaneously questioning your santiy and plotting to throat punch you. remember, its of dire importance that you recap the last five minutes of harlem heights to your girl while on the train at 8:13am.
5. thou shall partake in internet beef
6. thou shall willingly be “the other person”
if in doubt, just remember that jay-z said that its basically mandatory that grown ups have affairs
7. thou shall be a condescending vegan or atheist.
8. thou shall get fired from various occupations, repeatedly
when doing this, thou shall also try to find a different reason for termination each time.
9. thou shall practice and perform the piss-boy pirouette
whenever an attractive woman walks past, make sure to react as if you’re a type 1 diabetic and a giant insulin-filled syringe is switching down the street. leer. point. wag your tongue. spin in a complete circle. try to accidentally castrate yourself by blindly walking into a fire hydrant
10. thou shall unironically refer to thyself in the third person at all times
unless, of course, you’re the champ, who’s the exact opposite of what thy strives to be
hmmm. do you think they missed anything?
*****edit 10:50am*****
11. (from me fail english?)
thou shall affect white accents to give thee words more authority, while simultaneously incorporating overused hood maxims.
[In best Peter Jennings voice] “For all intensive purposes, it’s a cut and dry situation at the end of the day…”
12. (from k)
thou shall proclaim to like something ONLY b/c it’s not ‘mainstream’ or nobody else likes it.
this includes religion, types of music, food, clothes, clubs, the opposite sex etc.
*****end of 10:50 edit*****
—the champ
****admin note: vsb-ers, my homegirl keia works for the WNBA, and is currently holding a sellathon to raise money to buy WNBA game tickets for inner-city elementary and middle school kids this summer. a simple 50 dollars will buy tickets for 10 kids. if you’re interested in helping some young brothers and sisters out, contact her at mcfaddy15@aol.com for more info.****
Look who’s first? I had NO CLUE that this is what CORNBALL meant!
@GOODENess,
What being first? Or announcing that you’re first?
@Dorian G.,
I’m guessing it’s announcing, lol. But Goodeness gets a pass cause she’s a Macy Gray doppelganger. But she changed her profile pic. ; )
@RedBeanzNRice,
“Goodeness gets a pass cause she’s a Macy Gray doppelganger.”
*head to the side, nose scrunched*
ummm…I would say “thanks” but…ummm…is this supposed to be a compliment? cuz last time I checked MG looked (and sounded) like a retarded, mute, Donkey that has had too many cocktails!… I’m just saying…can we get some more people over here?
(all “?” in THIS entry were used properly)
@GOODENess,
Yeah, it was a compliment. I like Macy Gray.
@RedBeanzNRice,
Like Macy Gray in what kind of way? Physical attraction? I don’t see the resemblance at all. Learn me please.
@GOODENess,
retarded, mute, Donkey that has had too many cocktails!
so this donkey can drink but he can’t talk?
@The Champ,
NINJA! you don’t have to be able to talk to DRINK a DRINK…it’s a fuggin DONKEY he ain’t going to the d@mn club! GEESH! you think too much!
“NINJA! you don’t have to be able to talk to DRINK a DRINK…it’s a fuggin DONKEY he ain’t going to the d@mn club!”
i’m just saying, if the donkey is drunk, he needs to be able to speak to order a drink in the donkey club
@RedBeanzNRice,
Whatchu mean???
@Dorian G.,
dang…a sister misuses ONE “?” and just can’t get a break…lol…I was excited to be first and sh!t and typed faster than my inn English knot-zee could read…won’t happen again boss!
I have a question, what if a guy lies about NOT sleeping with a woman because of embarrassment of said woman. Does that make him a cornball, and of course what if a woman lies about sleeping with a guy because she’s trying to bring herself up, does that make her a cornball? Or do only traditional corny sex lies count?
@Dorian G.,
@ lies about NOT sleeping with a woman because of embarrassment of said woman
L.O.S.E.R which = beyond cornball
@Dorian G., i think in this case, he’s a cornball for sleeping with the chick that he has to like about sleeping with
@osyeP,
Agreed. And a chick who lies about sleeping with a dude is pretty lame as well.
Some lonely broad did that on Tyra this week.
@Dorian G.,
Or do only traditional corny sex lies count?
all penetration deception counts, standard and untraditional
@Dorian G., Isn’t this just called being discreet?
“whenever an attractive woman walks past, make sure to react as if you’re a type 1 diabetic and a giant insulin-filled syringe is switching down the street. leer. point. wag your tongue. spin in a complete circle. try to accidentally castrate yourself by blindly walking into a fire hydrant”
LMAO. But my favorite (or most despised) is #7. I am passionate about this one. Any form of condescension will get you added to my “I can’t stand..” list of nouns. Cynical people I can deal with, even like. Condescending bastards…
Uh..ooh! I’ve employed “no homo” once. Only once. After observing the people using the term I realized I would soon be grouped with these cornballs if I didn’t change my ways.
@ Champ
Is there any way to regain lost cool points? Or are these offenses simply unforgivable?
@Ms. Hall,
Okay VSB. This post was lost, somehow, so I thought I’d be anonymous in the re-post. Now it reappears only to out me as being corny. Thanks a lot guys.
@Ms. Hall,
Is there any way to regain lost cool points? Or are these offenses simply unforgivable?
sure. you can gain cool points back. just don’t try to lose em again by replying to your own comment, and you’re cool
LMAO at #9. But my favorite (or most despised) is #7. I am passionate about this one. Any form of condescension immediately places you in the dislike category of my brain. Cynicism I like. Condescension I hate.
@ Champ,
I have this friend who used “no homo” once. She..I mean..He saw the error of his ways and never used the term again. Is he doomed to be a cornball forever? Or can he somehow regain those lost cool points? What should I tell him?
@Ms. Hall, I feel the same way about condescension..I mean you can disagree all you want but that shyt pi$$es me off….
@Ms. Hall,
I hate cynics! I always held the contention they must be secretly unhappy and scared of disappointment. Which is fine with me but why Debbie Downer the isht outta everyone else’s lunch? Throat-chop!
@Me fail english?,
I feel you. Most Americans are usually optimistic. However I worked with the French for a few years so now the cynicism is just funny to me.
**side note: What’s with all of the violence? Specifically abuse to the throat area? I’ve seen several posts, mostly by female posters, referencing this Bernie Mack endorsed method of settling your differences. Is the throat-chop the new black?
@Ms. Hall,
“Is the throat-chop the new black?”
Yes. Especially if you’re miss t-lee.
You should try it out sometime. It’s rather refreshing.
@V Renee,
It’s madd refreshing.
And yes..throat punching is the new black.
I agree totally with your list..I hate corny a$$ ninjas with a passion that burns as hot as 10,000 suns…
Corny ninjas name drop..their car, where they live who they know etc…if in 2 minutes of conversation I have your business card, know who your boss is, how much you make what kind of car you drive and where and how much you paid for your home? you are a lame a$$ cornball
if you inject sexual overtones into every single conversation
if you wear a gold chain of any sort
or you wear button downs with no undershirt and the top 2 buttions open…if you wear the top 3 buttons open you are also a pedophile or a rapist
if you give laugh so hard at your own joke you cant finish it and when you finally do no one else ever laughs? you guessed it
@shay_d_lady,
“if in 2 minutes of conversation I have your business card, know who your boss is, how much you make what kind of car you drive and where and how much you paid for your home? you are a lame a$$ cornball”
I think I met a tribe of those the other night..I mean U was nauseated at the lengths these ninjas went to to “impress” who/what they think I am is ri(fuggin)diculous!
@shay_d_lady,
“Corny ninjas name drop..their car, where they live who they know etc…if in 2 minutes of conversation I have your business card, know who your boss is, how much you make what kind of car you drive and where and how much you paid for your home? you are a lame a$$ cornball”
This sh1t right here makes my teeth itch! And we have all me some1 like this and if you haven’t then please count your blessings.
Like this one muhfukka who felt the need to let us know that his house has 2 swimming pools – muthafukka for what???
@YGB,
“Like this one muhfukka who felt the need to let us know that his house has 2 swimming pools – muthafukka for what???”
So he can let you know that he has at least THREE places to pee in, that’s why! You ain’t a balla fa real if you don’t have at least a bathroom AND a pool to pee in!
@blackberry molasses,
LMAO!
Sounds like the type to only drink the finest of Cambodian breast milks. Anything else, well that shit just aint baller.
“So he can let you know that he has at least THREE places to pee in, that’s why!”
OMG why did this make me laugh out loud forreal?LOL
@blackberry molasses,
LMAOOOO! Stop!
Man, to hell with that fool!
@YGB,
Like this one muhfukka who felt the need to let us know that his house has 2 swimming pools – muthafukka for what???
Now its too dayum early in the morning for me to be laughing this hard. CUT IT OUT
@shay_d_lady, “Corny ninjas name drop..their car, where they live who they know etc…if in 2 minutes of conversation I have your business card, know who your boss is, how much you make what kind of car you drive and where and how much you paid for your home? you are a lame a$$ cornball”
These people SUCK.
@shay_d_lady,
“or you wear button downs with no undershirt and the top 2 buttions open…if you wear the top 3 buttons open you are also a pedophile or a rapist”
I thought I was the only one that thought that! Dudes that do that give me the heebie jeebies. Especially if they have taco meat on their chest and trying to show it off…
@shay_d_lady,
“if you wear a gold chain of any sort”
*looks around nervously* mine is flava tho!
I also admit to being a native ny’er and former seventh grader.
lol@ the laugh part. I do laugh at my own jokes and on occassion I’m the only one. In my own defense though, I genuinely think I’m funny. Not my fault that no one agrees *shrugs*
@shay_d_lady, or you wear button downs with no undershirt and the top 2 buttions open…if you wear the top 3 buttons open you are also a pedophile or a rapist
I this several times last weekend. And one guy had the nerve to also have on a gold chain and had an extra hairy chest. yuck!!
@N.I.A. fabuloussince1982….,
Tangentially related, but I’ve always wondered: Are hairy-chested chain-wearers concerned about the chain getting caught in the hair? Has this happened? What is the on-the-spot solution ( cutting the chain free when he gets home is the first thing that springs to mind)?
Important questions, these.
@shay_d_lady,
Corny ninjas name drop..their car, where they live who they know etc…if in 2 minutes of conversation I have your business card, know who your boss is, how much you make what kind of car you drive and where and how much you paid for your home? you are a lame a$$ cornball
“name-dropping” would have made the cut if the list was extended to 15
@shay_d_lady,
“if in 2 minutes of conversation I have your business card, know who your boss is, how much you make what kind of car you drive and where and how much you paid for your home? you are a lame a$$ cornball”
Not to bring up past discussions, but yesterday VSS told me that money = looks as far as women were concerned. So is flaunting your money = flaunting your a$$? If so how is that corny?
@Dorian G.,
I think a gratuitous display of money/status/ass/breastmeats/cars/jewelry and other stuff is just in poor taste. They all make the offending party look corny, if not desperate.
But everyone defines “gratuitous” differently.
@Me fail english?,
i’m a fan of gratutious displays of breastmeats, thank you
also if you say “what it do” GTFOH…….
@shay_d_lady,
Well, that’s not really corny- it’s just tired.
@shay_d_lady,
Don’t really think this is corny…that’s like the daily greeting doing here.
@miss t-lee,
I mean down here…lawd…lol
@shay_d_lady,
“if you wear a gold chain of any sort”
Chill out! I’m west indian, and a native ny’er, its in my blood, plus no1 knows I have have it on till I take my shirt off…so the question is if your feeling me, we go out have a good time, go home and about to get intimate, I take my shirt off, am I a cornball!? Does your panties shoot up?
@Toussaintthefree,
Lmao at your indignation!
But, in all seriousness, yes. Mine would.
But, you know, diff’rent strokes for diff’rent folks.
@WordSmith,
LMBAO…the mental visual of this is hilarious!
Plus, I keep thinking about the scence in Friday when Debo had took ol’ boy’s gold chain and he said,
“My GRANDMOMMA bought me that chain!” and he runs off like a little girl.
Gold chains are corny, though…
@Toussaintthefree,
One of my co workers is west indian and omg he has on a gold chain. You can barely see it. I wonder if he has a lot of chest hair??? Maybe i’lll ask him.
@Toussaintthefree, so the question is if your feeling me, we go out have a good time, go home and about to get intimate, I take my shirt off, am I a cornball!? Does your panties shoot up?
yes
@shay_d_lady,
O well, I must be a cornball then…and I’m proud! So thats three ladies that won’t give it to me…I can understand gold teeth, but a gold chain!? Whatever lol
My name is Monk…and I’m a cornball.
My corny jokes is the reason for this though, not the things The Champ mentions above. I consider THOSE people a variation of douchebags, asshats, flossers, perpetraitors, and socialites. And I wish they stop giving my fellow corny folks a bad stigma.
Thank you. God Bless. Good Night.
@Monk,
I thunk of YOU as soon as I read the post…and to make the record crystal clear…YOU ARE NOT THIS!! That’s why I was so confused-ed about that “cornball” meant…when I think CORNBALL, I think bad jokes and sappy humor…not caddy keys jingling ATM receipt flippin lying on they d!ck looking boys! People that follow these commandments deserve whatever “bad stigma” they get!
@Monk,
I think you’re fly! I’m sure that was a cornball thing to say, but who gives a “blank”? At any rate, you’re not a cornball – you just express yourself in a humorous way that’s different from the norm.
If you weren’t pissy yellow, I even go as far as saying you’re sexy. Get some sun – we’ll talk. ; )
@RedBeanzNRice,
Woooe hold on there Red… I know for real that the AA’s w/ less melanin don’t like being refered to in the same conototation as micturition. (my baby sis is not so melanin endowed as are some of my cousins)
@WuDaMan,
You know what Wu – you’re right – sorry bout that. I never even looked at it that way – it’s just a term I grew up hearing. *shrugs*
@RedBeanzNRice,
I feel you I have been tryin to learn what is easiest to come accross non harsh. Cuz written prose is not my thing. & tone is soooo hard to convey. n u ain’t got to be sorry be better. matter o fact I know some ways you could… nah
just playin.
@WuDaMan,
so why i had to full on go an d google what micturition means…. i fail at context clues.
@shay,
Don’t sweat it shay I have been in a lot of circles through out my life n I pick shyt up… Now we all know though right
@shay,
oh but ‘conototation’ but that shyt right there ain’t no word it’s a typo.
@RedBeanzNRice,
So I’m sexy in a golden shower type of way??
@Monk,
Yeah, Monk. My definition of CORNBALL is much different. And, in fact, each of the items/traits Champ listed have their own individual names…neither of which is cornball.
@iloVEGrits,
I’mma use plenty of leeway with how I view cornball here sorta in the same way Bodie’s use of “Simon” couldn’t quite be pinned down yesterday…open for interpretation…
@maria,
*high five and secret VSS handshake*
I WAS THINKING THE SAME THING!
I was readikng this and was like…
“oh these is sum ole SIMON looking a$$ ni99as!”
FYI – I think I used “SIMON” like fiddy-lebben times yesterday!
@GOODENess,
lol. I think if I use that people gone start looking at me like why is the old azz (30 yr old) woman talking about some dayum SIMON?.
@mssmtaylor,
foh’real…d@mn…guess since I should stop it then, lol
you all are on the right track. bodie’s “simons” is definitely what i had in mind.
@iloVEGrits,
Yeah, I just read the Champ’s edit. I’m kind of late now.
@Monk,
My corny jokes is the reason for this though, not the things The Champ mentions above. I consider THOSE people a variation of douchebags, asshats, flossers, perpetraitors, and socialites. And I wish they stop giving my fellow corny folks a bad stigma.
i made an edit to the entry to explain the context of corny. there’s a good corny, and an evil corny.
@The Champ,
My man.
Thou shall still fall victim to tryin to “fit-in” by any means necessary. This will usually entail one, if not all, of the following traits: being fake, being 2-face, partaking in, perpetuating or promotion of obnoxiously adolescent-isk gossip that your too grown self knows is some b.u.l.l.s.h.*.t
You will always have your priorities askew…as in Example 1.“it’s summer time, so I don’t need to pay that gas bill”…instead your purchase some dumb sh*t you don’t need but that you really, really want” Example 2. You bail out of or dodge a commitment b/c something “better” came or is possibly going to come along… I’m not taking about relationship commitment more like, “No I can’t make your birthday party/be by your side post-surgery/attend your blog of the year award etc b/c I got courtside tickets to…I just won a trip to New York (you live in New Jersey), um my new gadget (laptop, digital camera, Wii) arrived today so I’d rather play around with it…etc.
@maria,
“Thou shall still fall victim to tryin to “fit-in” by any means necessary.”
Actually, because I’m into entertainment and the fact that I DON’T try to fit in with the “in-crowd” is part of the reason they look at ME as the corny one. I’ll be dat.
@Monk,
I don’t see you as corny at all for NOT changing you to try to be part of the “in-crowd” in fact, that is the opposite of cornball. Stayin true to yourself is what my point supports…the “in crowd”usually are the ones that are bending themselves any-which-way to so-called be runnin sh#t, it’s usually just in their lil circle or mind that they are actually the front-runners…
@Monk,
“Actually, because I’m into entertainment and the fact that I DON’T try to fit in with the “in-crowd” is part of the reason they look at ME as the corny one. I’ll be dat.”
I think this is what would make a person uncorny (if that’s even a word)! Do you man!
@YGB,
Of course in my book, they’re the lame ones, but you know how it is when everyone’s just a bunch of d*ck rydas and you’re not. You’re going to always get looked at as the odd ball. Oh well.
oh and cornball/super l.a.m.e.a.s.s you deny your family (children) to try to get sum…seriously, wow! you just sunk to an unforgiveable low…
@maria,
i don’t think this is corny as much as it’s just asinine! Anyone who does this deserves to have their nether regions stomped!
@YGB,
trifling > corny
@maria,
lol, yeah. this is past corny.
…this is an extremely accurate description of an a$$hole I know. I feel much better having left his a$$ alone.
…thanks and sh*t.
@Resident GRitS,
any time and sh*t
I’m not sure our definitions of cornballs mesh, Champ. But if I were following your line of thinking (and, since it’s your site, I guess I have to) I would add that a cornball is a person who needs constant guidance/advice/support/direction to make decisions about their lives. I am finding more and more that this is a very irritating personality trait in a person. Hell, even if you make a bad decision you made it.
@iloVEGrits,
in the context of the entry, “cornball” defines someone who’s infinitely less cooler than they think they are. with that said, i wouldn’t necessarily call the person you’re describing as a cornball, just a loser.
@The Champ,
Now I understand. Thank you for the education.
@iloV.E.Grits,
thank you for your brains
2. thou shall incorporate each of these terms in your daily lexicon, and thee incorporation shall be unambiguously unironic: hate. “no homo”. pimp. gay. playa. fo shizzle.
I think this has to be my favorite. Unless you’re a highschool sophomore…you are definitely a cornball
Just generally lie about everything. Even ish that noone really cares about…like your shoe size. Extra points for extremely unbelievable and/or obvious lies
@Imperfect,
Even ish that noone really cares about…like your shoe size
yeah, the person who lies about sh*t noone cares about anyway gets a booth at the cornball convention
@Imperfect,
“Unless you’re a highschool sophomore…you are definitely a cornball”
or
You’re white and you’re trying too hard to impress your negro friends.
i have a good one! Hi VSB! **waving** U facebook and text message stalk people with secxual convo’s and innuendo and u barely know a person. You know… u get their information- for whatever reason… and u just start chatting with them on facebook and introduce scex into the conversation or send random texts of a questionable nature. You and this person never came to any kind of consensus that you had a relationship of any sort… let alone one that permit sexual conversations… so. in summary, facebook, and text message stalking people is CORNY.
@pgh muse,
How about “grown-ups” who send you mass textings to the tune of:
“Do u think I’m sxy?? Reply 1=yes, 2=no”
That and chain letters make me wanna box God.
@Me fail english?,
omg I cant stand chain txts or chain letters and of course they are all being sent by some grown ass people. no i will not forward this stupid sh!t to 14 people. get the fluck outta here.
@mssmtaylor,
Chain letters make me wanna cry I swear! I think I will just take the chance of the 7 years of bad luck thank you!
@mssmtaylor,
please excuse my errant use of the ‘enter’ key but umm….you actually had somebody send you that?!?!?
my faves are the ones tied to BBJ a la pass this along to 12.7 people you know or you will not be allowed entry to the pearly gates. really?!?! st. peter ‘gon be asking about my internet/cell phone usage?!?!
like, ‘naw SG.’
*st. peter tilts his halo to the side and strikes his best b-boy pose*
‘it says here (checks list like a club bouncer) that on Neveruary 32nd, 2009 you failed to forward that message about how the man upstairs…well really, right over there ’cause we already upstairs…
but anyways, about how he carries you in times of need–did you NOT see that one set of footprints in the sand? and how you are too blessed to be stressed so shame the devil and pass this on otherwise you are denying your savior message that you got.
‘member? you know the one from your girl T, even though she got it from her good and grown co-worker who ain’t been to church since hector was a puppy. but nevermind. she’s right behind you and im’ma deal with her next. FAIL. you shall not pass!!!
and then he bangs his holy staff like gandalf in the lord of the rings when they were stuck in the mine fighting that monster and i too fall into the dark chasm into the welcoming arms of satan.
at least that’s how it plays in my head whenever i get one of those. if i like the message/it brightened my crappy day or whatever and i feel like it, i’ll delete the crap and pass it to whoever i d@mn well please. i really don’t think BBJ is gonna block my blessings for not participating in mass forwarding hysteria. he know what it is.
@SouthernGirl has escaped the data dungeon.,
THANK YOU!
This whole scenario just has me cacklin over here!
Be still my heart coz my time on earth is officially through!
@SouthernGirl has escaped the data dungeon.,
*scooting over to make room for you on the table dance couch in the corner*
this whole joint had me ROLLING! you ever seen a red girl turn red before?? IGNIT!
@GOODENess,
*sits next to Goodie. apologizes for ending YBG’s time on earth*
i mean…i’m just sayin’….
*snicker*
i just see it so clearly in my head though…
@SouthernGirl has escaped the data dungeon.,
**Diva Dust v 4.5 ™**
this.was.BOOIFUL!!!!!!
@SouthernGirl has escaped the data dungeon.,
I mean I love the encouragement of the (you are a wonderful woman/mother). When when negro’s start sending ish like “if you love Jesus send this to 100 ppl within 15 mins or your car aint gone start.” thats enough to change my number
@SouthernGirl has escaped the data dungeon.,
LMBAO!!! I see that being in that dungeon causes your mind to get extra creative. Keep up the good work!
::snickering::
@SouthernGirl has escaped the data dungeon.,
“i really don’t think BBJ is gonna block my blessings for not participating in mass forwarding hysteria. he know what it is.”
The “he know what it is.” part is hysterical and so true to me.
@Me fail english?,
@SouthernGirl,
Girl I kept the message short for brevity’s sake. On some real isht…
“TEXT EVERYONE N SEE WHAT THEY RATE U!
1=flirt
2=lover
3=krazy
4=fun
5=cute
6=sexy
7=my baby
8=f-able (me fail’s edit, lest I wind up in moderation limbo)
9=wifey/husband
10=best friend…send me”
That’s verbatim! Yuck. Its my fault for having the same cell number since HS!!
@Me fail english?,
this makes me sad.
@SouthernGirl has escaped the data dungeon.,
Really sad.
@pgh muse,
yeah, making EVERYTHING a double entendre is definitely corny…unless you’re the champ responding to comments on vsb, of course
I too am having difficulty with your definition of cornball… but h3ll, this is your party and I’m just crashing.
I think my father is the corniest of cornballs and he displays none of the traits above. He just has corny, old man sensibilities sometimes… and they make me laugh. Its one of the reasons I love my dad. There are other men around me (my own included) that I have called corny, and its all with love.
I think what you have written is the “Ten Commandments of Being a Socially Inept A55hole.” That being said, I don’t disagree with you. I will add to the commandments a wee bit later.
@blackberry molasses,
check the edit and sh*t
@The Champ,
well sheeeit… check the timestamp of my comment. we were prally writing at the same time!
“plotting to throat punch you”
I’m always plotting …lol
All 10 of these were examples of classic douchebagerry behavior. (as my 2520 friends call it).
I think it sounds more appropriate than cornball, but what they hey…
Carry on.
@miss t-lee,
speaking of douchebags, have you been here?
http://www.hotchickswithdouchebags.com/
@The Champ,
Sure have. My 2520 homegirl hipped me to it.
I even learned what the guido culture was all about…lol
*the more you know*
@miss t-lee,
ahhhh guidos…. yes. I live in NJ. The ORIGINATOR and PERFECTOR of the animal called “Guido”
I’ll add to this list:
-People with big dreams and no plans to make them happen.
-People that talk a buncha ish about someone else in the hopes that they’ll make an “ally” out of you.
-People who ask me a lot of questions in a row, with no sense of shame… I can’t be held responsible for how I react and you’ll probably dislike me afterwards.
-People who complain when you won’t lend them money or give them rides. I’ve never given birth. I owe you nothing, Uncle Jake.
-People who pretend to know things and say it with conviction, when they really were just guessing. I’d much rather you tell me you don’t know how to get to 70th so I can ask someone who knows than be sent on a dummy mission. Thanks for the “help”
I’d like to add stars who say something was “taken out of context”. No…it wasn’t
or we remain great friends”. No you dont
@Me fail english?,
*snickers* I like your list.
And another thing…
(yes I reply to my own posts, much the way I laugh at my own jokes. I might be corny for that.)
-People who try to tell me how I grew up based on how I’m doing now and people who think they know how far I can/will get in life based on how I grew up.
I am young, black and educated. I straddle many realms. Don’t fence me in…douche!
@Me fail english?
“I’d like to add stars who say something was “taken out of context”. No…it wasn’t”
This always cracks me up. They (Usher) are full of shyt. Own up to what you said, don’t be apologetic. C. Milian’s hair did look a hot azz mess. Her and “radio killa” need to be smacked.
At the risk of wearing the angry black woman crown I shall add to my post yet again….
-People who fake accents. Even worse than blaccenters are people of color who affect a “white accent” to give their words more authority…all the while using poor grammar, overused hood maxims and confusing words that sound alike, but don’t really mean the same thing.
[In best Peter Jennings voice] “For all intensive purposes, it’s a cut and dry situation at the end of the day…”
Stop it.
-People who purposely mispronounce words to sound cool or down.
Again, stop it…or I shall be forced to thrash you.
-People who think they can jedi mind trick you into un-seeing/hearing some isht you already seen/heard!
“What powdered donut…there’s nothing on my mouth…even if I ate it, I probably found it somewhere…no, not in your lunchbag…”
Grrrrr
@Me fail english?, “[In best Peter Jennings voice] “For all intensive purposes, it’s a cut and dry situation at the end of the day…” ”
LMAO.. This about kilt me
@Nicki Sunshine,
Lol. Girl, don’t even get me started. I knew this one dude who tried to tell me “congratulations” was spelled with a ‘d’. So after I bet him 20 bucks he called his friend to verify who proceeded to tell us why it was spelled with a ‘b’ (yeah that’s right, “congrabulations”) in his most proper ye olde”British” argot (he was from West Philly)… as if that excused the fact that he aint never seen a graduation balloon that said “Congrabs!”
@Me fail english?, LMAO stop it. Just stop. It’s too early for “Congrabs” around here
This might be inspiration for a GrammarNator post on my blog.
@Me fail english?, LMAO..That is sooo funny. He was trying to impress and FAILED.
@Me fail english?,
PLEASE STOP! I’m seeing black spots from laughing too hard!
@Nicki Sunshine, I agree. Bwhahaha I just snorted my chai tea
@Me fail english?,
People who fake accents. Even worse than blaccenters are people of color who affect a “white accent” to give their words more authority…all the while using poor grammar, overused hood maxims and confusing words that sound alike, but don’t really mean the same thing.
Yes! This makes my stomach hurt…
@Me fail english?,
“-People who complain when you won’t lend them money or give them rides. I’ve never given birth. I owe you nothing, Uncle Jake.”
BWAHAHAHAHA!
@Me fail english?,
Damn, you’re really on a roll here…
Good list.
Blog me The Champ for I have cornballed
*lays down on red plushy leather couch*
#5. Me n Da Hostess got into it a long time ago. It’s a rare situation in my life. I happen upon some people n when I hear their voice I get irate. My ocd (zodiac stuff n superstitions) has shown me it occurs redily w/ Aquarius women (okay it happened once maybe twice). I’m like @ least I hate her not complacent her (cuz complacency is the true opposite of love). *shrugging shoulders* I don’t understand it. But I want to. She is my blogworld arch nemesis because of one day on here n one day on her blog that led to a few days following but I was in a bad bad space when this was starting.
#9. I love gauking @ hot chicks. I don’t go there no more because I have learned the secret peek. N E body Ceen Role Model. bwuahahahahaaha BOOBIES
@WuDaMan,
Everytime I read your posts I feel like I got high. Thanks and sh!t
@Me fail english?,
You welcome n Regular bm’s all around. Yeah welcome to my world. It’s like this in my head all fuhckin day. BTW I really almost failed english twice.
@WuDaMan,
“#5. Me n Da Hostess got into it a long time ago.
She is my blogworld arch nemesis because of one day on here n one day on her blog that led to a few days following but I was in a bad bad space when this was starting.”
is this actually true, or just another wu-ism?
@The Champ,
It’s true to the blog world. I feel like I don’t ever want to meet or see a pic of her hear her voice. I think on a lesser level (she has nothing to do with hostess snack cakes). My bad bad place explained – N I was 1.breaking up w/ the ex-fiance n had lost 6 family members in 5 weeks. Some of the stuff she was saying made me incredible hulk mad. Reminded me of the mindset of the ex too. N for some odd reason I like it a lil staying mad w/ her. Who knows maybe it’s a case of ‘when it rains it pours.’ Am I projecting?
@WuDaMan,
Am I projecting?
probably. its aiight though
@The Champ,
Oh crap I got baggage. uh this is the very thing Bodie n the guys on her was wiling about. Projected junk n baggage. That’s whats so horrible about sloppy 8ths. That n they sloppy 8ths.
@WuDaMan,
What’s your sign?
- Aquarius woman
@WordSmith,
-Aquarius man Year of the Earth Horse
Thou art a cornball if you wear a bedazzled medallion of your face around your neck – i.e. Ricky Ross, Plies
Thou art a cornball if you refer to oneself as a goon.
Thou art a cornball if you are male, come to the club with no money in your pocket, convince other people to buy you a drink, and when Lil Wayne’s “Got Money” comes on, you are the first one to get extra hyped.
**can we just replace cornball with lame? I feel it’s more fitting**
@V Renee,
Addendum: Thou art a cornball of the most severe proportions if you buy bottles and get a booth at the club and rent a room/do not have a car.
@Me fail english?,
What if you live in a metro area and choose NOT to have a car?
@Dorian G.,
I guess that’s fine. I more meant people who spend money to front at the club and they can’t afford to live comfortably
@Me fail english?,
I wasn’t actually looking for a serious response there lol
@Dorian G.,
Yes, yes. Me fail blog response subtleties. When is lunch?!
@Me fail english?,
What if you have more pleasure being/buying bottles at the club than owning a house and/or a car?
I don’t know. That’s somebody’s whose priorities are not mine but I don’t know if it’s lame or douchebaggy per se.
@V Renee,
O SO TURE!! You touched a nerve..knew this cornball when 50′s ” I gets money” came on he threw out fifties and hundreds…FAKE fifties and hundreds, ninjas was looking for him!
@V Renee, “Thou art a cornball if you refer to oneself as a goon.”
***clapping frenzy ***
@Nicki Sunshine,
So I’m guessing I can go with goblin and still be in the clear?
@Dorian G., LOL. Nope, hon. That’s not gonna work either.. No “hard” nicknames
I would add:
Thou shall proclaim to like something ONLY b/c it’s not ‘mainstream’ or nobody else likes it. This includes religion, types of music, food, clothes, clubs, the opposite sex etc.
* that should read: members of the opposite sex.
@K.,
Yeah I don’t care for the mindless poseur-contrarians either. Possible that I’m confusing this with cynicism. Maybe that’s why I’m turned off by cynics in general.
@K.,
Thou shall proclaim to like something ONLY b/c it’s not ‘mainstream’ or nobody else likes it. This includes religion, types of music, food, clothes, clubs, the opposite sex etc.
this is a great one. i’m actually mad that i didn’t incorporate this on the list somehow
@K.,
Yes. The extremists who loathes everything just because others like it and loves everthing just because others hate it are pretty lame in my opinion.
how about sunglasses in the club? i still can’t figure that one out
this list is making my morning
@peachi,
i still can’t figure that one out
me neither.
@The Champ,
I dunno I’m on the fence about this one. On the one hand is incredibly corny. On the other hand what if the person was just feeling like sunglasses and was doing them without concern for how you felt? That is the antithesis of corn right? I started thinking about this while watching the “Blame it” video last night. I was like wow them dudes is having a blast and they all have sunglasses on in the red club lol. Am I corny for hating on them?
@Dorian G.,
Lol. My girlfriend used to do this cause she swore nobody could tell she was drunk with her shades on. She was actually right
@Me fail english?
I think sunglasses make the person wearing them feel not as drunk. And it can hide your eyes which show right away how phucked up you are….cause you know eyes are the windows to the soul n sh*t.
@V Renee,
screw that I want people to know how drunk (or high) I am. Red eyes for everyone!
@Dorian G.,
Thou shall overanalyze a tongue-in-cheek blog entry.
LOL
@K.,
Oh myne tongue was also clearly planted in mine cheekeths lol
@Dorian G., LOL ok, was just teasin’
@peachi, I agree.. sunglasses is in the club is WACK..
***singing: I wear my sunglasses at night ***
@Nicki Sunshine,
Cory Hart, is that you??
@peachi, how about sunglasses in the club? i still can’t figure that one out
me either. Last weekend at this party, they weren’t letting people in wearing sunglasses. It was hilarious.
@peachi,
I agree. SUNshades in the club is like a sixth toe, useless.
1. thou shall repeatedly practice penetration deception
2. thou shall incorporate each of these terms in your daily lexicon, and thee incorporation shall be unambiguously unironic: hate. “no homo”. pimp. gay. playa. fo shizzle.
I have a former classmate wh ogreatly exaggerated his sexxiness, and his secsual experiences. And, to add to #2, I would add “real talk”. He would constantly say this after he said something questionable or untrue, especially his regarding sexual rendevous. This dude was a cornball in general, and then he became a Kappa, which just exacerbated his wactastik cornballishness….
@N.I.A. fabuloussince1982….,
damn. thats an orgy of corny
@The Champ,
a cornucopia of corny….
@N.I.A. fabuloussince1982….,
A plethora of corny.
@miss t-lee,
superfluous cornballishness….
Cornball to me is wearing long socks.. I only like my men in ankle length. LOL
@Nicki Sunshine,
two words: tighty whities
@maria, AMEN! Ugh… Dry up like the Saharan deserts
@Nicki Sunshine,
hayy boo!!!
@Dorian G., I see you. You betsta have on those ankle lengths too!
@Nicki Sunshine, Can I add: a wack arse mainstream ringtone makes u a cornball.
I don’t want to be in a library and hear: “Shawty let me beep, beep, beep, beep, beep.”
@Nicki Sunshine,
So is non mainstream song is cool? Can I blast the new Drake joint on my phone?
@Dorian G.,
Yo, that Drake – So Far Gone, is in heavy rotation on my Ipod…
@AkShone,
mine too.
The regular version and the screwed & chopped…lol
Love it mayne!
@miss t-lee,
We really must get together and drink, dear.
@ Nikiloveli,
You’re in the H right? I’m gonna be down next month for my BFF’s baby shower, and the other BFF’s birthday. We should try to make it happpen.
@AkShone,
You know my problem tho? That ni**a ruins a couple songs by singing on it when it wasn’t necessary. Like I’m flowing with him, emo and all, then he just bust out singing. I’m like wtf??? You can tell he still needs some polishing too cuz everytime Weezy jumps on a track he takes over the song. But all in all, very solid MC, and I know he’ll get better. Looking forward to the Young Money album.
@Dorian G., I haven’t heard Drake yet…
Yes, I am with any song that is not played on 106th & Park or some’n.
@Nicki Sunshine,
Or letting the phone ring…loudly is irritating as heck. As if to show off the 6-year-old triumph of technology that is “Realtones”, or whatever they’re called.
@Me fail english?, Exactly!!!! So loud to where you can’t even understand the words???
I went to get my license renewed Saturday and a phone went off with the loudest VULGAREST song. I turn around and of course it’s a lil hood rat, answering, “hell-a”
@Nicki Sunshine,
LOL @ “hell-a”. I had to say that out loud to get the full effect.
@Nicki Sunshine,
cracking up @ (hell-a)
@nia and mssmtaylor,
If I translate correctly, it’s hoodrat for Hello. LMAO.
@Nicki Sunshine,
*sigh*
i heart you. im’ma go on ahead and throw some *gold stars* your way. i thought i was the only one.
i don’t know why but those tall socks drive me insane.
@Nicki Sunshine,
Only ankle length dress socks too? Whatever floats your boat…
CRACKING UP!!! Yaa thinks that people that ride around in artic azz temps with their windows rolled down and blasting their music should be added to the list. Yaa also thinks that people that walk around the club holding a bottle should be on the list. (Most of the time the bottle is empty anyway after said person and his boyz or girlz have pooled their money between 15 people to buy the bottle only to get a sip).
@Yaa,
Yaa also thinks that people that walk around the club holding a bottle should be on the list. (Most of the time the bottle is empty anyway after said person and his boyz or girlz have pooled their money between 15 people to buy the bottle only to get a sip).
Heh, heh, heh. GUILTY! Although, my bottle is NEVER empty and if I got up and walked away with it, trust me, I aint sharing. I can see how this makes me a bit douchy though.
@Me fail english?, shaking my head.
@Me fail english?,
so you’re a closet female douche? say it aint so and sh*t
@The Champ,
Hey, I’m not in the closet
You walk around with your drink. I’ll walk around with mine. I don’t run around with a shared bottle though. It’s my own bottle alone and I take it straight to the head…because I am a lady. *bats eyelashes*
@Me fail english?,
Are you talking about a BEER bottle? Just asking.
I’m convinced you and P just like startin stuff. You know GOOD AND WELL folks was gon have problems with yo definition of “cornball”.
Must we start with the man in The Mirror?? No. Ask him to change his ways.
@nia,
quoting Michael Jackson is corny
@Dorian G.,
Knowing that it was a Michael Jackson quote is cornier.
@nia,
Using the term “cornier” is extremely corny
@Dorian G.,
Analyzing variations of the word “corny” is the corniest of all cornish hens and the corns on yo feet!!!
Now!! What you wanna do??? **throwin arms up**
@nia,
“Now!! What you wanna do??? **throwin arms up**”
***starts break dancing, ending with a handstand on my neck***
You’ve been served!!!
@nia,
…that’s alotta corn.
@nia & Dorian G.,
I’m done with both of you.
Bwahahahaha!
@nia, n Dorian G.
Corn chowder, corn cakes, caramel cheese and butter popcorn, fried corn, corn pudding, corn meal hot cakes, corn dogs, high fructose corn syrp….
@Dorian G.,
What about “corniest”?
@nia,
Knowing that it was a Michael Jackson quote is cornier.
**fire returned**
@nia,
How could anyone over the age of 11 NOT know that was an MJ quote?
@Nikiloveli,
My point exactly. ALL OUR AZZES IS CORNY!
Too bad his nose now looks like a kernel. Oh Mike…
@nia,
Sometimes random words crack me the f up for no immediately discernable cause. “Kernel” just made that list. LMAO!! His nose looks like a KERNEL! ROFLMAO.
Yeah…I might need drugs.
@Dorian G.,
quoting Michael Jackson is corny
**shots fired**
@The Champ,
This whole thread was very entertaining.
1. Thou shalt boast about the money thou hast spent on thine clothes, cars, alcohol, jewelry, accessories, etc.
2. Thou shalt boast about thine possessions fully knowing thine parents purchased thine possessions.
3. Thou shalt boast about thine accomplishemnts fully knowing thine parents pulled strings.
4. Thou shalt wear sunglasses when there is no sun out and thou aren’t blind.
@Voiceofreason,
4. Thou shalt wear sunglasses when there is no sun out and thou aren’t blind.
I don’t wanna call blind ppl corny but why in the hell do they need glasses? What do I not understand about blindness that necessitates hater-blockers?
@Me fail english?,
LOL! Stop! I think some blind people wear sunglasses because they may not have control of how their eyes move. It’s to keep people from staring at them. Even if you can’t see, you know when somebody’s looking at you.
@Voiceofreason, “Even if you can’t see, you know when somebody’s looking at you.”
Goodness, that would be creepy.. I couldn’t imagine being able to feel someone staring at me and not being able to ID them
@Voiceofreason,
5. People that regularly update their status on Myspace, Facebook, etc. as if their “friends” care about what they’re doing right at a particular moment.
6. People who accumulate as many “friends” as possible on a social networking site(outside of business purposes) to appear well known.
7. People who take as many photographs as possible at clubs and bars and post said photographs on social networking sites to make it appear as if their life is interesting.
8. People who have tag lines on social netwoking sites such as “I see ya’ll hatin azz bytches starin cuz u kno u cain’t fuch wit me!”
@Voiceofreason,
“5. People that regularly update their status on Myspace, Facebook, etc. as if their “friends” care about what they’re doing right at a particular moment.”
For me, its not so much the regular updates… it’s that they are stupid!
“______ is at work.” WTF???? We ALL at work!
**sigh**
@nia,
LOL @ “We ALL at work!” As Kat Williams says, “We got bills and sh*t!”
@Voiceofreason,
*muses* yes… People who let the world be privvy to their relationship woes, friendship woes… heck every single second of their day, constantly changing their status. What’s even more irritating is when they use SONG LYRICS in an attempt to seem deep/convey their truest emotions. STOP THAT SH*T. You are NOT that interesting.
Also, people who randomly friend people that they were never really friends with. Nucca, I ain’t like you a$$ in HS, we weren’t friends in college… don’t get salty when I deny your request on FB.
Perpetuators of Bourgiebook/ GhettoSpace f*ckery need to DIE.
@Voiceofreason,
5. People that regularly update their status on Myspace, Facebook, etc. as if their “friends” care about what they’re doing right at a particular moment.
But isn’t that the primary purpose of said social networking sites?
@Ms. Sula,
To a certain degree, but I just don’t think a constant update is necessary. Like that new Twitter thing.
@Voiceofreason,
8. People who have tag lines on social netwoking sites such as “I see ya’ll hatin azz bytches starin cuz u kno u cain’t fuch wit me!”
i always wonder how long it takes a person to intentionally misspell a sentence like that.
@Voiceofreason,
lol you’z a fool for that one.
Can I add black people who are overly pretentious, for example…
1. I met this girl one time and was having what I thought was a decent convo, as I was telling a story I used the term “deebo’d”. She immediately paused and was like “what does that mean?” “is that slang?” “I don’t speak slang, its stupid”….oh ok, YOUR CORNY! (c) Haters ball
2. As many of you know I’m African, yes its true. So one time I’m at this house party (an African person’s home), and her mom made pounded yam and egusi, i’m guessing earlier in the day for the guest. So the celebrant is passing out plates and bowls, and of course the African people are getting down and choppin that thing well well. So her one friend (who was American) twist up her face all crazy on some “y’all eating with your hands? how nasty”….luckily it wasn’t my house cuz I would have wyled out, buuut YOUR CORNY! (c) Haters ball.
Now that I think about it only black women seem to engage in this corny type behavior (see what I did there?).
Read and discuss.
@Dorian G., “Read and discuss.”
I don’t know why this is cracking me up.
It’s so, “carry on” ish.
@Dorian G.,
Nice try Dorian. People who start arguments for argument’s sake are corny! LOL!
“But seriously, #2 is just plain rude and culturally insensitive,” said the American Very Smart Sista.
@Voiceofreason, ” People who start arguments for argument’s sake are corny!”
Took the words right out of my mouth, lol.
Thou shall intentionally make flammatory comments on blogs to incite a reaction…lol.
@K.,
What if I’m bored?
@WuDaMan,
Does boredom bring the cornball out?
@Voiceofreason,
Nah, if I’m bored an unecissary fight will 1. be entertaining 2. give me something to do and 3. some make up nookie.
@Dorian G.,
“Now that I think about it only black women seem to engage in this corny type behavior (see what I did there?). ”
Where should we hold your wake keeping? Lmao
@Dorian G.,
As per #2, people who say rude, out-of-pocket, harsh, mean stuff in the name of “keeping it real”, calling it how they see it, just being honest are just closet bullies. And see-through as hell to boot. We know you’re crying on the inside. And we all feel really bad about it *smirking*
@Dorian G., “her one friend (who was American) twist up her face all crazy on some “y’all eating with your hands? how nasty”
Throat-punch! You should never walk into someone’s house and disrepect their culture.
@Leila,
There it is again. The throat chop/punching.
@Dorian G.,
I agree with the others that was simply disrespectful. Not only to your culture but to your friend’s family as well.
@Dorian G.,
Now that I think about it only black women seem to engage in this corny type behavior (see what I did there?).
Read and discuss.
***minigun shots fired***
@Dorian G.,
I hope the behavior in #2 ended your friendship. I can’t be friends with close minded a$$hats… especially since I am also African.
Culturally insensitive/closeminded= cornhole (corny a$$hole)
@blackberry molasses,
I wasn’t friends with that girl, she was friends with the host. I was just another guest.
@Dorian G.,
Ha Dorian! How I love thee.
Thou shall go to the club, and not dance…at all. Don’t even pretend to feel the music, the rhythm, nothing. Just stand around with your boys or your girls thinking you are cooler than what you really are.
@N.I.A. fabuloussince1982….,
This right here…is some ish I can’t stand.
You shoulda kept your “too cool” azz at the house. Taking up good space on the dance floor.
*eyeroll*
@N.I.A. fabuloussince1982….,
Thou shall go to the club, and not dance…at all. Don’t even pretend to feel the music, the rhythm, nothing. Just stand around with your boys or your girls thinking you are cooler than what you really are.
good addition
@N.I.A. fabuloussince1982….,
Same goes for people who go to the comedy club and try hard not to laugh– madd tight in the face…
@N.I.A. fabuloussince1982….,
Mandate on that one.
And thou shall look at people who dance with a look of disgust in your eyes.
@N.I.A. fabuloussince1982….,
I don’t frequent clubs because I’m don’t like the atmosphere so if I’m there, it’s moreso just supporting a friend who’s throwing the party. And I can ‘shoulder lean’, I’ont know how to dance tho’ is my motto. I bop to the music if I’m feeling it, but other than that, not much dancing. I will patronize the bar though. Is that corny?
@Monk,
Well, since you don’t seem to be the type to just take up space on the dance floor just looking at everyone else, and you do “bop” if you can feel music, plus you like to post up at the bar, my gut tells me no, you are not corny for doing what you’re doing.
However, if I see you step your body on the dance floor, just standing in the way bopping and leaning, I will give you the “look at that corny muthaphuka not dancing and just leaning” side-eye. I’m sorry, but it’s an involuntary reaction to people, especially men, who stand around rather than participate.
Funny post
I know this is completely random and off topic, but my Trinidadian Uncle sent me this Trini KFC commercial and it made my day:
WE LIKE IT!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6f0c9auWweg
Check it out.
@Clarkey,
oh wow. i would say that this is like an snl skit, but this is actually funny
@The Champ,
That was kinda coonish to me.
Thanks for the shoutout and shit.
Word. I’se famous now!
Damn, the gold chain?! I wear a small figuero with sentimental value. You can’t even see it unless I take my shirt off.
I’m gonna co-sign the ‘tags’ on social sites. Ugh.
@BlkBond,
whats a tag on a social site?
@Clarkey,
tag as in instead of your name on myspace you have some thing like “www.haterproof.com” or “Ms. I see all you hater with xray vision eyeing me with a surgeon’s percision”, etc. Any other non-sense.
@BlkBond,
oh ok….yea thats a taste on the cornball side. Very high school girlish.
“Ms. I see all you hater with xray vision eyeing me with a surgeon’s percision” LOL!!
-Why do people think someone is always hatin? Is this a trend? I’m perplexed.
@Clarkey,
“Why do people think someone is always hatin? ”
I agree, that probably should be added to the list.
When I hear people say that I always think, sometimes people aren’t hatin’…they just not payin’ any attention or care, lol.
@BlkBond,
the f*ck?!! people do this?!!!
see my social networking rant above. this is added to it.
@BlkBond,
I don’t think anyone has a problem with sentimental jewelry or jewelry in particular – just excessiveness.
1) thou shalt not wear a tight shirt, wife beater, or no shirt at all in the club because you work out. (especially wearing a wife beater in the dead of winter)
2) thou shalt not wear Dickies pants with Gucci shoes
3) thou shalt not model just because your @ss is big
4) thou shalt not say your waves are natural when you have a tub of Duke at the crib
5) thou shall not wear an afro, dreadloks, wood bracelets, beads etc. like you are afrocentric when you are not.
6) thou shall not try to look cool at the expense of other people
7) thou shalt not put 24″ rims on a lifted and rusted early 80′s GM coupe.
9) thou shall not act educated or enlightened just because you have a degree
10) thou shall not have women act bourgeoisie just because they have to dress professional to work. (you make $10.00/hr play your position)
@Humble_One,
Wait…it’s corny to “act educated” when one has a degree?
@Nikiloveli,
I was thinking the same. Not everyone with a degree is smart, but educated, they are.
@Humble_One,
10) thou shall not have women act bourgeoisie just because they have to dress professional to work. (you make $10.00/hr play your position)
On another note…is this why the chicks at Victoria’s Secret be acting all stank? I worked in entertainment for a few years so I always came in casual (read: looking a hot, crispy mess). I’d shop there on my lunch breaks and some of the “suits” would get all high-handed with me. Bish! I make your salary in my summer bonus!
@Me fail english?
” I always came in casual (read: looking a hot, crispy mess).”
Okay this made me chuckle…..hard.
@Me fail english?,
“On another note…is this why the chicks at Victoria’s Secret be acting all stank? ”
Naw, they just stank and most likely unhappy with their lives. Retail is hard work.
wow i’m in moderation and didn’t curse?
@Humble_One,
cuz it was corny
@Dorian G.,
LOL!!
LOL this was a very coontastic post. good job, Champ.
wish i had more time to read the comments but i have business to tend to. good day lovely ppl
I thought of two more…
–People that stand in the bathroom mirror and use their camera phones to take pics and actually post them or send them.
–People that use their camera phones to take pics of their privates. I swear I got a phone full of dix flixs and it’s sort of nasty if you really think about it.
@Yaa,
A phone full…So why did you keep them?
@Me fail english?, Never thought about it and never really go back and look at them. You seen one…you seen them all (that didnt sound lady like LOL)
@Me fail english?,
A phone full…So why did you keep them?
Good question.
@Yaa,
eeewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
@Yaa,
Ok I keep hearing about this phenomenon but who sends those dix pics? Are they like normal/regular human beings? I just can’t fathom!
@Ms. Sula, I mean it seems like its the NORMAL thing to do now. I’ont know. But it has made me stop using other folks cell phones.
@Yaa,
Ok im guilty… I’ve done the whole camera in the bathroom pic. Only cause I thought I looked cute that day. But I aint sending nobody no pics of my “business”.
you do know that “no homo” has graduated itself to *pause* OMG.. I hate that mess so much. Just dumb…
it’s actually
“intents and purposes”
and not
“intensive purposes”
… think about it
Don’t worry… I’ve made the mistake before as well!