The Second Dumbest Reason People Give For Hating NBA Basketball » VSB

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The Second Dumbest Reason People Give For Hating NBA Basketball

At the moment, the New England Patriots, partially fueled by a gaggle of sociopathic self-righteousness after being “vindicated” by Deflategate, are undefeated and would seem to be the early favorites to win the Super Bowl. This information should come to no surprise to anyone who’s even a casual fan of the NFL. Because that exact same thing could have been said in 2014. Or 2013. Or 2012. Or 2011. Or, damn, any year that Tom Brady has been quarterback. Perhaps they wouldn’t have been undefeated at this point in those other years, but they would have been an early Super Bowl favorite, and they would have been partially fueled by a gaggle of sociopathic self-righteousness after being “vindicated” by…something. Because no one does fabricated vindication like a Boston sports team and their fans.

Now, the Patriots are generally recognized as a dynasty in today’s NFL. Which seems to make them an anomaly in a league where the concept of professional parity isn’t just paramount, it’s a part of its identity, etched into the thinking behind everything from its collective bargaining agreement to its television deals. If the NFL had a Tinder profile, “any given Sunday” would be listed in its bio, right underneath “fuck bitches, get money” and “support breast cancer research.” Its popularity is also related to this concept. Fans existing in cities with eternally shitty franchises like Tampa Bay and Cleveland keep hope alive by making that their own personal mantra. “Maybe, just maybe we’ll fart around and win nine games this year, and sneak into the playoffs. And then ANYTHING can happen.”

It is also a lie.

There are 32 teams currently in the NFL. Yet, since the 2000 season — a span of 15 years — the New England Patriots have won four times, and the Pittsburgh Steelers, the Baltimore Ravens, and the New York Giants have each won two. That’s 10 championships won by 1/8th of the league. And, in the 49 years that there have been Super Bowls, six teams (the Steelers, the Patriots, the Giants, the San Francisco 49ers, the Green Bay Packers, and the Dallas Cowboys) have combined to win 28 of them. This is not parity. This is oligarchy.

It is also, for many, the reason cited when they explain why they can’t stand NBA basketball. Because “it’s so predictable.” And because “the regular season doesn’t mean anything because you’ll just see the same teams in the playoffs this year.” And because they “miss the 80s and 90s” — a memory that doesn’t make any sense when you remember that three teams (The Chicago Bulls, the Los Angeles Lakers, the Boston Celtics) won like 982% of the championships then. 

Now, I will not dispute that these claims have some merit. The unique nature of basketball means that a dominant player will have more opportunity to provide an impact on the outcome of the game than he/she would in any other major professional team sport. For instance, as good as Tom Brady is, he doesn’t play defense, so he’s only able to have an effect on half of the game. Lebron James, on the other hand, can conceivably play every minute. This makes the outcome inherently less random, and the length of the NBA’s schedule and the playoffs series format make it even less random. These dynamics combine to make the NBA the sports world’s truest meritocracy. This is why, barring injury, you will undoubtedly see Lebron James in the finals again this year. And, he will be matched against another team with a marquee star. Maybe Stephen Curry, again. Maybe Tim Duncan, again. Maybe Kevin Durant and Russell Westbrook, again. Maybe James Harden, again.

But while some NBA distractors cite this as the reason why they prefer the NFL, they’re conveniently forgetting that the exact same dynamic exists in the NFL. And in college football. And even in college basketball. The same five or six teams win the title every year. Look it up if you don’t believe me. The only thing separating how these sports are perceived from how the NBA is perceived is the concept of hope. Which basically just means that they just have better PR. 

And this is the second dumbest reason to hate NBA basketball.

Damon Young

Damon Young is the editor-in-chief of VSB. He is also a columnist for GQ.com And he's working on a book of essays to be published by Ecco (HarperCollins). Damon is busy. He lives in Pittsburgh, and he really likes pancakes. Reach him at damon@verysmartbrothas.com. Or don't. Whatever.

  • Pinks

    The game play of bball is too fast for my eyes to keep up. I never know who has it unless they’re dribbling or shooting, so I just wait to hear the crowd get excited before I pick my eyes up and watch it. I also just learned the game of football about three years ago because hubby was tired of me rolling my eyes every Sunday.

    Is the WNBA still around?

    • No one pays attention to the WNBA but it’s still around.

      • LadyIbaka

        No one but Champ.

        • I still don’t see how the WNBA is profitable. Even during their playoffs, I don’t believe many sports fans watch.

          • It probably isn’t. High-level collegiate women’s basketball is much more entertaining.

            • So how do they stay in business? I can’t imagine them filling up an arena for these games. They have got to be in the red at all times, every season.

          • Val

            Perspective, AP, perspective. The NBA was around for 30 years or more before it became a mainstream sport in the 80s during the Bird/ Magic era. And that was at a time when sports viewing wasn’t so fragmented.

            Also, the WNBA has a relatively small but very loyal fan base. And, since the fan base is mostly women and kids you don’t really here a lot about them because most sports talk is dominated by men.

            The WNBA will be fine. They need to tweak a few things like getting more exposure on ABC and finding a way out of their ESPN2 contract. But, long-term it will be around.

      • Val

        *slowly raises hand*

        I do.

    • Damon Young

      yea, the WNBA is still there. maya moore is a beast.

      • Brass Tacks

        Stop Damon. You know you haven’t seen Maya Moore play since she left UCONN

        • Damon Young

          i see highlights and shit. plus, they show wnba games on nbatv during the summer time.

          • Brass Tacks

            I skim past those shenanigans on my way to check ESPN, also. We both know nbatv in the summer is only relevant because of D-League hoops, and Open Court Re-runs.

            • Damon Young

              summer league hoops too

              • Brass Tacks

                Of course, Because Rookies.

            • Brandon Allen

              I definitely struggled watched some FIBA this summer tho.

              • Brass Tacks

                I just want Team USA to be consistent. We can’t fall back into the lull of getting to comfortable.

      • LadyIbaka

        I love basketball, but hate the WNBA. I don’t even know them not unless they are involved in scandal. For exampla, those two that married only to divorce then to find out she pregnant or something along those lines.

      • Pinks

        Apparently I watched an entire game with Maya Moore playing and didn’t know it was an NBA game. I asked hubby and he reminded me of the night we saw it – I thought it was college, but he said we saw them win the championship.

        Dang. I feel terrible lol

  • Womp womp womp. NFL > NBA > Soccer > Rugby > Chess > MLB

    • QuirlyGirly

      LOL- Chess beats out baseball?

      • What doesn’t beat out baseball??

        • YeaSoh

          I would say: NFL > NBA > Soccer > Rugby > Chess > Paint drying > MLB

          • Brass Tacks

            I guess: NFL > NBA > Track > Soccer > Turkey Sammich > Crossfit > MLB >

            Although, If I had to pick one sport to excel in. I am definitely choosing baseball. Those guaranteed contracts are the equivalent of a winning mega millions lotto ticket

            • Reasons why I need to move to a large city with a competitive MLB team(s). I’m trying to be a trophy wife one day and they make bank.

              • LadyIbaka

                You gon be like that chick writing essays to groupies?

                • Idk who you’re referring to but if I ever ended up wifing a professional athlete I’m not doing a thing but sitting pretty in the box and minding my business.

                  • LadyIbaka

                    The one dating that Latino somebody. I think he is a baseball or football player.

                    • YeaSoh

                      Football player with the 5011 wh0res

                    • Moderation is wack but I’m not addressing any side heauxs. I’ll sign those papers, collect my prenup $$$, and collect my child support coins for our kids.

                    • LadyIbaka

                      I support it!!!!!!

                      I’d do my nails M, W, F.
                      T, TR shopping
                      Saturday-out with my girls
                      Sunday-go thank the good Lord for providing.

                      A girl gotta stay on point. Oh and make sure to invest my funds for when I’m ready to leave him!

                    • I’d have my own business on the side for sure. I won’t be want for his funds in the event of a separation.

              • Brass Tacks

                Atlanta, Ruby. Besides, you would prolly look nice in Braves garb. ijs

                • Any spot south of the Mason Dixon is fine with me. Also, California would be nice too.

            • Crossfit, though? That it’s even on the list…

            • YeaSoh

              You seem like the type to Crossfit > Turkey Sammich… interesting, No Shoulders.

              • Brass Tacks

                I have to head into this meeting. Just know that my reply is, yes.

                • YeaSoh

                  Wuheva dat mean… you know you gon essplain yo’self rye?

        • QuirlyGirly

          You may have a pernt! Golf maybe? I think Golf is worst than baseball

        • Everybody but my Royals. Bam!

        • IsitFridayyet?

          Golf

          • Both put me to sleep within 5 minutes of watching.

        • Pinks

          The only reason I care about the World Series is for the Mets. I feel like as a Queens girl, I’m obligated to root for them although I know not a player on that team’s name.

        • Val

          Baseball is better than NyQuil on a summer Saturday afternoon. I just turn on a game and I’m out. Lol

      • Damon Young

        i actually like baseball. which sucked for me for a while because the pirates sucked. but they’re good now, so it doesn’t suck.

      • Kamari Camille

        Watching paint dry beats out Chess. LOL

    • Damon Young

      womp on deez

      • Keisha

        LOL…that never gets old

  • Keisha

    GO COWBOYS and GO SPURS!!! :-)

    • Yes, Cowboys.. just go.

    • miss t-lee

      Spurs yes.
      Cowboys absolutely not.

      • Val

        Your team is having it rough this year. I’m surprised.

        • miss t-lee

          My football team? Hellz yes they are.
          I try to be optimistic, but a girl has her limits.

          • Val

            Lol Right. My Giants just started being halfway decent so I know how you feel.

            • miss t-lee

              Enjoy it! It’s what makes the bad seasons worth it.

  • 8 out of the last 9 Super Bowl Champs have been different teams. Conversely since 2007 the Spurs have won twice, the Heat won twice, and the Lakers won twice. The Spurs and the Heat even faced each other in one said Finals. And in one of the Finals that was one included the Lakers.

    If your NBA team doesn’t have a star player then there is no reason to watch your team for years. The only exception to that rule (ARGUABLY) in the entire 60+ history of the NBA was the Detroit Pistons for briefly in the 90s. The Bengals, Giants, Cardinals, Falcons, etc. are all in the thick of a playof race even without any greatness at the QB position.

    • I trust Malik on this bc I don’t follow the NBA. I’ll pass on watching because I know there aren’t many competitive teams from the East or West. I can predict how the Playoffs will go depending on who has what players.

      I’ll take a hard pass on the NBA for this reason. My team ain’t been competitive since the 90’s and never will be again. I’m good. Gimme Football!

    • Damon Young

      “If your NBA team doesn’t have a star player then there is no reason to watch your team for years.”

      Unless you just like watching basketball, but I digress.

      Also, all that’s happening in the NFL right now is colored bubbles. The teams that will be left standing in December and January will be the teams with great QBs. Being in the “thick of a NFL playoff race” in October means as much as a Rich Dollaz promise.

      • CleveCavClan

        That is incorrect. The post-Decision Cavs were (after they got Baron Davis) a beautiful disaster for like 4 years. Also, the Warriors beating the Mavs as an 8 seed.

        I could come up with a compelling reason to watch any NBA team. Including the 76ers and that Shirley Temple-drinking Joel Embiid

        • JoJo will be a beast if he ever plays.

          • CleveCavClan

            Yeah, I agree.

      • The Seahawks JUST won the Super Bowl with Russell Wilson in his second year. Russell Wilson wasn’t near being a great QB in 2nd year. He still isn’t one now. Neither was Joe Flacco when he won the year before. In fact, this will likely be only the second year the Ravens DON’T make the playoffs and compete for a Super Bowl with Joe Flacco as the QB. Same for when Eli won either time.

    • LadyIbaka

      Malik, why do you like turtlenecks?

      • YeaSoh

        QTNA

      • I like being warm.

        • QuirlyGirly

          Sweaters keep you warm

          • I own sweaters as well.

            • goatee!

            • QuirlyGirly

              All right- Malik- I see you!!

              In a turtleneck or a sweater you looking good

            • Thirst trappin’?

              • Never in my life ma’am.

            • Jennifer

              Cheekbones!

    • Brandon Allen

      You can conceivably get a star in the NBA tho. Basically, if you don’t have a top 5 quarterback you got no shot in the NFL.

    • Outside of it being ran like the mafia/ OPEC one of the the biggest problems the NFL has is that there are to few good quarterbacks.

  • Brianna

    Futbol>NFL>NBA>Tennis

    • Brass Tacks

      NOPE.

      But thanks for playing. :)

      • QuirlyGirly

        BT that was mean! funny but mean

        • YeaSoh

          Brass be tryna act like he ain’t HELLA shady/petty like a :) gon take the sting away… side eye

          • LadyIbaka

            His petty is soooo schegggzayyy!!!

            • YeaSoh

              He definitely has great execution

              • LadyIbaka

                That’s why he is bae….

        • Brass Tacks

          Im sayin tho, QuirlyG?!

      • Brianna

        Soccer will beat out any other league or sport any day……its on an International level…..only Americans don’t get excited for the World Cup

        • LadyIbaka

          Word! But I hate it. Only watch it when it’s World Cup.

          • YeaSoh

            My niece plays and even at her games I be like “when is this sh*t over!!!” All that running back and forth is just… ugh. Now I will say though, it does get good every once in a while, like real good… like every sport I guess. duh well

        • Football > Soccer

          Americans don’t give a hot chit about what the rest of the world enjoys.

        • I like soccer because thighs and calves.

          I’m only partly joking. But, I do like soccer because I think it’s a really beautiful game.

          • QuirlyGirly

            I like soccer because thighs and calves

            I’ll allow this comment!

          • miss t-lee

            “I like soccer because thighs and calves.”

            Yup.
            I only watch during World Cup, and I discovered new fine players every four years.

            • And when they’re fine, they are soooo fine.

              • miss t-lee

                Girl…I was all over the Spain and Portugal team last world cup…lol

                • Gerard Pique? Xabi Alonso? Yes, please.

                  • miss t-lee

                    yes. There was a few on the Argentina team, as well.

        • Brass Tacks

          The only reason the “World” beats us out at Soccer, is because America is too busy being great at everything else.

          • Brianna

            That’s the arrogance and ignorance that other folks mean when discussing “Americans”

            • Brass Tacks

              YUP

    • Kamaria Camille

      Girl no

    • Brandon Allen

      Futbol is like basketball if no one ever scored.

    • Epsilonicus

      Rugby is better than futbol

    • Val

      I’ll admit I like watching the men’s or women’s World Cup but just watching a regular old soccer game, nope.

    • Janelle S

      I will say this, though: futbol has a higher overall percentage of hotness than any other sport. Every time the World Cup rolls around, I am reminded of how much I miss out on.

  • I hate NBA basketball because the uniforms are baggy now and not those cute little daisy dukes from back in the day. And plus also, the court is too small and I hated playing basketball in middle school. But mostly the baggy shorts.

    • High key why I also enjoy football. SPANDEX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

      • Yep, if they switched over to spandex uniforms, I might could get into basketball. It makes football sooo much more interesting.

        • So. Much. Azzzzzzzzz. And. Thighs!

          • Yassss. I don’t understand the sport but I will tune everything out to watch regardless. Because, spandex.

            • I enjoy football because it’s really easy to follow. Keep your eye on the ball and you’re good to go. The rules of the game are also easy enough to catch onto if you’re just a casual watcher.

              • I get lost with the downs and the plays that go deeper than “Give so-and-so with the nicest thighs the ball.” Baseball, I love for its simplicity.

      • miss t-lee

        All of the keys, shidd.

    • Val

      The women look even more ridiculous in those pants they call shorts. Smh.

  • I love the NBA but I really love the game; playing and watching. I’m a little curious what the dumbest reason is.

  • Figure skating > football > everything else

    • LadyIbaka

      I think you need Jesus more than the rest of us.

      • LOL I would take Surya Bonaly back-flipping on ice over any of it. IDGAF.

        • Surya! Oh, how I adored her when I was younger. There was a brief 15 minute documentary with her a couple months ago.

          http://espn.go.com/video/clip?id=espn:13416371

          • Her and Kristi Yamaguchi had me living for figure skating. I can’t wait to watch the doc!

        • LadyIbaka

          Aaaaaaaayyyyeeee!!!! Yaz. I used to watch basketball because I loved watching the game but after being introduced to Ibaka’s print, now all I do is compare and contrast.

          • lol Okay, so Ibaka does basketball? Duly noted. See but you can’t appreciate anything with those baggy shorts they wear.

        • miss t-lee

          I loved Surya and ice skating, but no way I’m picking any of that over man thighs in spandex.

          • But there’s man thighs in spandex in figure skating!

            • miss t-lee

              Have you seen men’s figure skaters vs football players?

              no contest.

              • Yeah I know… I wanted to try and argue my case either way but football and track booty are the GOAT.

                • miss t-lee

                  You already know.

    • Val

      Quit kidding around, Sawyer. Lol Someone might think you’re serious.

      • Psh! Figure skating is amazing! Athleticism set to music does it for me. And, spandex!

    • Yessss to figure skating!!

  • I’m trying to get back into watching the game. I’ve vowed to pay more attention this season. I used to watch it more often growing up (it was easy, of course, because LAKERS), but I’ve been fair weather about it for a good long while since, well, since Lakers ain’t getting it together.

    • Damon Young

      the lakers could be decent this year if kobe played 15 minutes a game. but they’re much more entertaining with Kobe playing 25 minutes and taking 35 shots

      • I don’t see that happening, unfortunately, especially given that this is (supposed to be) his last year.

    • QuirlyGirly

      I am trying to get back in to it too. I am looking for a team to root for now cause the Knicks ain’t hitting on…

      • If you’re trying to stay in NY, there’s still the Brooklyn Nets???

        • QuirlyGirly

          Oh snap, I forgot about them. Are they a good team? I want a team that is on the come up- the cusp if you will- of being a great team

          • Girl, don’t make me lie to you lol. I have no idea if they are a good team. One of the othermore frequent NBA watchers might be able to give suggestions?

            @disqus_YeG1FUyAV7:disqus?

            • Brandon Allen

              Brooklyn is the team with the least hope in the whole league.

              • Even less than the Knicks?

                • Brandon Allen

                  The Nets have no draft picks for 4 years and no star players. They’re trapped in mediocrity for at least 5 years.

                  • Ohhhh. Sucks to be them then.

      • Brandon Allen

        No. Stay with the Knicks. They are on the come up.
        The future is here, Young Kristaps with the cornrows!

        https://s3.amazonaws.com/wp-ag/wp-content/uploads/sites/72/2015/10/Screen-Shot-2015-10-22-at-10.19.27-AM.jpg

        • QuirlyGirly

          Nah- I need receipts-

          I been tricked by the Knicks. They are teasers. You think they about to win and then they let you down

          • Brandon Allen

            Already 1-0!

            • QuirlyGirly

              LOL! at least they won their 1st game. I will give them another chance.

        • QueLoQue

          Porkchaps is gonna take them to the promised land

      • Val

        I know how you feel. I’m a Giants fan. But don’t quit them before the miracle happens. The winning is sweeter if you suffer through the bad years.

        • QuirlyGirly

          The winning is sweeter if you suffer through the bad years.

          Very true..I may give them another chance

        • Speaking of, I do recall you flapping them gums during preseason about my boys. You see us right? Undefeated? At the top of our division?

          • Val

            And we’re in first place, so….

            • I’m just saying, you had a lot to say about my team and we’re balling right about now.

              • Val

                Well, I still think Carolina is overrated becasue of that suck azz, fake-azz, made up conference they play in. So there. How ’bout them apples. Lol

                • In their defense the Falcons are actually good this year.

                  • Val

                    True. The Falcons are a weird team. They go from sugar to ish so fast though. It was only like 4 years ago they were really good and then bam, they just collapsed.

                    I hope they can play well for the entire season.

                    • That’s just how the league works. Don’t replace some key people or whiff in the draft, free agency and bam.

                • Stay mad!! Lol Your conference is looking like trash more than ours is this season

                  • Val

                    Listen, I am trying to respect your team, AP, but so far only two of their wins are halfway legitimate. Once they beat some really good teams then I’ll lay off.

                    And thank God the NFC East is trash otherwise we wouldn’t be in first place. Lol

        • That’s what I’m trying to convince myself by getting back into NBA and still rooting for the Lakers.

  • Dougie

    Yo Damon… Great post *daps*

    I think most people who hate the NBA, hate it because they have short attention spans. 82 games is too much for them, and people who are great at things that take too long, end up being polarizing.

    • Damon Young

      yeah. in defense of the nfl, it’s perfect for people who aren’t really fans of football.

      • Brass Tacks

        ???

        • Damon Young

          you don’t have to be a huge football fan to follow the nfl. it’s more palatable to casual sports fans than a NBA or MLB season

          • Brass Tacks

            I can see it, but I wouldn’t necessarily agree. I think the helmet-less nature of the NBA actually allows them gain a better casual fan base.

            • Brandon Allen

              It’s both. The stars of the NBA are more visible, but it just takes less work to follow an NFL team. Season is shorter.

            • I agree with this. The only reason casual fans know the faces of players is because each individual franchise has at least one player who is the “face”. Other players are known because of endorsements and such. I am honest enough with myself to say I don’t know all 53 men on the Panthers squad. I know at least 35 though

            • Dougie

              that matters, but football is slower and there’s breaks between every play. It makes it a lot easier to watch for a casual fan.

            • Damon Young

              this helps with individual stars and helping them get endorsements and sh*t. whereas, with nfl teams, with a few rare exceptions, the qbs and coaches are the stars

          • Epsilonicus

            Good observation

          • That makes sense on some levels. It’s like super hero movies are bait for people who don’t really care about comics but can still be enjoyed by hardcore comic fans.

      • Dougie

        football also ends its when people wanna stay in the crib. NBA ends its season when cuffing season is over and sundress season is getting into full stride.

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