marcee tidwell (regina king), ‘jerry maguire’
while most of us seem to hold claire huxtable as the fictional black wife benchmark, no one better exemplified what it means to be a true ride or die wife than marcee tidwell. from her invention of “the quan” to her willingness to whoop aries spears militant ass for talking too much negative sh*t, king’s awe-inspiring performance almost even makes cuba gooding’s cooning bearable
claire huxtable (phylicia rashad), ‘the cosby show’
the tupac of tv and movie mates (so unconditionally revered and lauded that their legacy is more memorable and transcendent than they actually were themselves), claire huxtable exemplified class, grace, and beauty while showing the world that its possible for black women to have five children who look absolutely nothing alike
zee (nona gaye), ‘the matrix reloaded’
i know her placement on mt rushmore seems puzzling, but consider these three factors:
1. she was staunchly committed to her man despite the fact that each of her two brothers (dozer and tank) were killed messing around with the same crazy ass boss (morpheus) he’s volunteering to work for.
2. she didn’t hesitate to battle the machine army, which helped to get her man back home and, you know, continue the human race. some janky broads won’t even kill a spider for you and zee was out there running around in a tweed sports bra shooting sentinels and sh*t
3. she looked like this
and stayed devoted to a man who looked like he’s in a perpetual state of the swine flu¹
mrs. jackson (bebe drake), ‘boomerang’
she brought a five gallon bucket chitlins for thanksgiving and let mr. jackson “whip dat p*ssy” in the bathroom next to the kitchen. nuff said
although i know my mt rushmore is thorough, i’m curious: who’d be on your mt rushmore of black television and movie mates? remember, you can only pick four.
also, even though my list is all women, feel free to make a mt rushmore of black male mates if you’re compelled and sh*t.
¹seriously, if you had to rank “sickly looking ass n*ggas in film”, harold perrineau (link from ‘the matrix’) would be number one, closely followed by andre royo (bubbles from ‘the wire’) and macy gray from ‘training day’