approximately two or so years ago, while bored and aimlessly late night searching for girls gone wild informercials channel surfing, i came across a roundtable of hip-hop heads on mtv28 discussing the “state of hip-hop” and reflecting on the year’s big events. when the year’s biggest event (the ending of the nas/jay-z cold war and subsequent merger) was brought up, each of the dozen or so people at the roundtable nodded their heads in joyous approval and spoke about how great it was that these two iconic figures finally decided to make peace and music with each other.
well, each of the dozen…except one.
as soon as the mention of this peacemaking was brought up, the camera panned to this one person, who was making a face like he was being forced to suck on a lemon stuck between her…
..legs. a look of sheer disdain and disgust and hate that these two grown men had the nerve to stop beefing, and that mtv had the audacity to laud this as a good thing.
when the moderator finally asked this one person what the hell was wrong with him, this one person remarked (**paraphrasing**)
“i’m sayin though, b. ya’ll n*ggas acting like n*ggas in the street care about what these old ass n*ggas do, b. word is bond, i gots my ear to the streets, b…i talk to them young n*ggas everyday, and they aint worried about no aarp-ass n*ggas squashing beef. naw, man. i make my music for the 14 year olds that wanna hear about my life…b*tches and hoes and weed and killing n*ggas. the 14 year olds in the street do wanna hear about no damn peace, b.”
when you combine the amount of sheer, unadulteratedly jubilant ignorance this person happliy exhibits, plus the fact that he’s helped to perpetuate a horrendous trend (young african-american men dressing like jamaican dancehall artists) despite his incessant clowning of “f*gg*t ass rappers with tight jeans” (read: kanye), plus the fact that he’s a founding member of the most aggressively ignorant crew in the history of hip-hop, plus his resonate and undoubtable influence and appeal with many young-minded idiots people, is the reason why…
…jim jones is my least favorite person in america, and the bane of vsb.com’s existance.
dishonorable mention: owens, terrell. kilpatrick, kwame. the chubby snizzle who lives on the bottom floor of my building who always makes a big fuss about moving away from the door when she’s out there blocking the entrance and smoking cigarettes.
so, dyspeptic readers of vsb.com, who is your least favorite person in america right now, and why?
—the champ
I have a couple.
1. The head of an organization I used to work at. Dude owes me $9660. It’s been months since I quit; I had to file a claim with the Dept. of Labor. I won. But he’s not responding to their requests to pay up. Bastard.
2. This chick who works at the reggae club I frequent. I dislike her just cuz.
I’m with you on this V.E.G..
“I feel like it’s still n*ggas that owe me checks / I feel like it’s still bytches who owe me sex” – Kanyeezy
is there gonna be a point five years from now where there’s a kanye quote for every situation, akin to jay-z quotes today?
yeah, no. as big a kanye fan as i am, i really dont think that’s going to happen.
I actually think that might happen. Anybody who thinks they should/would be featured in the Bible will be quoted for years to come.
And you, Champ. Cuz you promised to guest blog for Luvvie today and she ain’t heard from you.
check your email
*erases Champ from list*
Luvvie, Kindred and I were gonna come looking for you…
“Luvvie, Kindred and I were gonna come looking for you…”
…and??
We were just going to find you, point you out, and… yeah thats about it.
But we love you now, Champ!!
oh, so THATS what the infamous Jim Jones looks like! I’d never seen him before…
um…least favorite person? I’ll have to think on that one.
for some reason I always imagined Jim Jones to look like the Grinch (of the Grinch that stole Christmas fame)…I disliked him cause The Champ said it was the right thing to do… maybe I should get more people.
**shrugging shoulders***
I’ll be back
im in the same boat….but i imagined he looked like a a swirling vortex of evil and chicken bones…but the champ hasnt steered me wrong yet.
vortex of evil and chicken bones????
_____________________________
“maybe I should get more people. ”
not really. lol. i’ll be your more people. you ain’t missing much by disliking jim jones on GP.
“oh, so THATS what the infamous Jim Jones looks like! I’d never seen him before…”
Seriously? wow. I thought Champ was the only one in a cave.
““oh, so THATS what the infamous Jim Jones looks like! I’d never seen him before…”
Seriously? wow. I thought Champ was the only one in a cave.”
burn!
Treated!!
lmao!
“oh, so THATS what the infamous Jim Jones looks like! I’d never seen him before…”
you’ve seen him before. he has many disguises…. kinda like the devil.
my name is young…. and i approve this message
Palin! She has got to be the most insinuatingly nauseating Middle American f*cktard to ever rome planet earth!
That is all.
Palin = Peggy Hill
TMZ made a side by side by Palin and Peggy…I loved it.
MIddle America?
McCain = Cotton Hill
haha!!!
McCain = Cotton Hill
LOL… He already called Obama, “That One.” I can see him referring to Michelle directly as, “That One’s wife.”
I have to agree. I can’t see how she lets some of the hate come from her mouth.
“I can’t see how she lets some of the hate come from her mouth.”
this is exactly how i feel about the comeback girl
wait…where’s the comeback girl??
Speaking of missing people, where has Shay d Lady been????
I’ve seen Comeback out in the blogworld…..covering people with her wet heavy blankey, one blog at a time.
I’ve seen Comeback out in the blogworld…..covering people with her wet heavy blankey, one blog at a time.
good. i was hoping she didnt accidentally drown herself with it or something.
im here you guys. And I SO WISH YOU WOULD NOT CALL MY “BLANKETS” …BLANKETS.
they are quilts, shams, and throughs-and an occassional dust ruffle. lightly scented with lavender. fresh out the washer on high spin, ok.
“wet heavy blankey, one blog at a time”
“I’ve seen Comeback out in the blogworld…..covering people with her wet heavy blankey, one blog at a time.”
wtf??? lol i never do this.
I know, but it was funny to type
“I know”
but i DO do this. i was just being ironic with my dust ruffle.
Yes, I was reading this waiting for someone to say Palin.
I hate her cause if McCain drops dead, she would be President (this is all if McCain wins) and we can’t have that.
i swear ya’ll might have to permanently put me on the sick and shut in list if this man wins.
i swear ya’ll might have to permanently put me on the sick and shut in list if this man wins.
ive wondered what the backlash in the black community would be if obama lost…or won, lol. i forgot which comedian joked about how the day after the election would become an immediate black holiday, bigger than kwanzaa.
wouldn’t take too much to be bigger than kwanzaa. i know a solid 1 person who actually celebrates kwanzaa. interestingly, she told me i was less black for not celebrating it. i told her she was less Black for marrying a white dude.
i won.
*giggling* at this whole comment.
At least you know 1 more person than I do who celebrates Kwanzaa.
same here! i wish somebody would tell me i was less black for not celebrating kwanzaa…
I want to know why you and Champ aint ever been in the corner?
good question and sh!t. lol.
I should probably stop reading this post, since there can’t possibly be a comment funnier than this…..but I’m not.
My apologies for cussing.
lol…we forgive you and sh*t.
i dont think ive ever had someone apologize to me for cussing. well, other than one of my nieces
We haven’t seen CG in a couple of days…I miss her.
Least fav?? Bush, McCain, and Palin automatically comes to mind.
they make my list too. that mccreepy smile just gives me nightmares…
It’s because he doesn’t have any lips.
I ain’t lying…lol
I know I am going to get killed for saying this but I find Sarah Palin highly, highly entertaining. She was the highlight of the VP debate. My vote won’t go to her ticket but I’ll miss her after election day.
oh, the heffa is mad entertaining but damn it, she still annoys me and i feel like she’s setting women back with all her nonsense, f^uckery and tomfoolery.
my girl sent me a link to a palin flowchart on how she made it through the debate. it’s hilarious. i’ll post it.
here it is.
http://www.buzzfeed.com/jonah/sarah-palin-flowchart?w=1
This is funny.
thiats hilarious…
I admire the chick’s hustle, I do.
Small town mayor to governor to VP candidate? I should have dreamed bigger.
And though I don’t agree with her views I won’t knock them. Not too much anyway, lol. He!!, my maw maw is pro-life and pro guns. Southern Catholics love their guns and babies.
“I should have dreamed bigger.”
dang, V.E.G., you ain’t neva lied. i can see Mexico from my [parental's] backyard and i’m Mexican–i’m like my own damn embassy. that makes me worthy of a presidential nomination. of what party?? the VSB party, heyyyyyyy.
After watching the VP debate – Biden didn’t bowl me over, either – I was like, “I could be VP”. lol.
And when they were asked the question ‘how would you lead if the president died?’ I said a silent prayer, begging God to never let us find out how either one of ‘em would do.
not to piss in your Wheaties, but i rescind your worthiness of presidential nomination to the VSB Party. the champ and I have yet to properly vet candidates.
we’ll have our people call your people.
“we’ll have our people call your people.”
And then, BOTH your people must summon their own counsel of MORE people. Yes, I approve of this process.
there’s gotta be a way to circumvent all that mumbo jumbo. i’ll be workin on it…
lucky for me i run these streets. lol. and all calls come to me b/c i’m a loc’d out OG.
this comment had no point.
“this comment had no point.”
Agreed.
In regards to Sarah Palin’s hustle, I think Matt Damon put it best. Actually, he made it a hot line, these cats made it a hot trailor.
http://my2cents-sense.blogspot.com/2008/10/too-funny.html
I saw that. Ish cracked me up.
Again I say, I should have dreamed bigger dreams for myself.
I agree. Her hustle is tight. But damn it, make sure you have something to offer when your hustle comes through. She makes me weep for women in these interviews. I disagree with how she is presenting herself. I don’t knock her as a whole, even though I do disagree with almost everything that comes out of her mouth, but she is not ready or stepping up to the plate.
Definitely not ready. During the debate she was naming countries I am sure she didn’t know existed three months ago.
yeah mostly because she can’t see them from her backyard.
Is it possible to be pro-life and yet be pro-war??
A lot of conservatives are pro-life but support capital punishment.
And a lot of liberals support choice but are against capital punishment.
That always confused me.
i’m usually not that sensitive about certain “political” issues, but about pro-lifers i say a big “F*CK EM, F*CK EM, F*CK EM” (c) Katt Williams. why would you force a woman to bring a child into this world she (and maybe the BD) can’t/won’t take care of?? same unwanted bastards will likely be out on the streets years later muggin folks or in schools shooting them up. why?? becuz they weren’t cared for or loved properly since their birth was unwanted and regretted.
for those against abortions, they need to figure out how to take care of kids currently in abusive/neglectful homes, orphanages, foster care system, etc with better policies and social programs. unfortunately pro-life platforms don’t exactly advocate for those “blessed” embryos/fetuses after they’re OUT the womb and IN society. “glad you’re mommy didn’t kill you but F*CK YOU now that you’re able to breath on your own. welcome to the world!”
“why would you force a woman to bring a child into this world she”
I agree. I go back and forth with the abortion issue (darn Catholicism) but I must say that I think it is immoral to have a child you know you can’t effectively parent. If it’s a sin, the woman will face God on judgment day.
And nobody betta mention placing the child for adoption!!! It’s not so easy for black babies to get homes. The MAJORITY of newborn babies up for adoption are black. Our folk aren’t adopting the way white folk are and, yeah, a white family may want to adopt a lil brown bugger but they usually want a kid that kinda looks like them first. Setting a kid up to grow up in the system is not cool.
i consider myself spiritual and i gets down heavy with my main man JC and The Good Book (+apocrypha). but i have absolutely NO trouble sleeping at night with other people making their own daggone decisions about sin vs. God’s will–that’s they business. i think the only time the govt needs to interfere is in regards to lung-using humans. but that’s just me.
*stepping down from soapbox* good night and good luck.
“i have absolutely NO trouble sleeping at night with other people making their own daggone decisions about sin vs. God’s will”
We are on the same page. And I have a serious problem with the government legislating morality. So while I thank God I’ve never personally had to face the choice I’ll be damned if someone else is told she can’t have a choice in the matter.
My issue is with abortion as birth control. To that I say, close your legs you overly fertile heffas.
My biggest thing is people trying to force their opinions on me and tell me what I should do with my body.I’m not knocking anybody who’s against it. That’s your choice. So don’t knock me since I’m for it. It’s a personal decision. I’ve never been in that situation, but to tell me that I legally, cannot even have the option? NO.
Now I’m not advocating abortion as birth control but however a woman decides to do it, it’s her choice. On top of parents that are not financially/mentally ready and how hard it is for black kids to get adopted as mentioned, I especially can’t get with folks who are against it in ANY situation, like SP. Rape? Incest? No ma’am.
The no abortion EVER thing blows my mind. Like, you want a woman to carry a baby conceived through rape/incest???? Don’t they realize how that could fcku somebody up, mentally? And health care being what it is, the mother would get subpar, if any, counseling…
im on the same page with you ladies…im pro-choice because i dont know that i could ever have an abortion, but i dont feel like my decisions and choices need to be imposed on every other woman in the country.
i dont know a whole lot of pro-lifers personally, but im gonna go out on a limb and guess, that a whole lotta them are NOT adopting kids (especially not Black kids). they wanna make sure the child is born, but then wanna complain when their tax dollars go to pay for it…
Even thought I was raised in the church and thus indoctrinated to think that abortion in all cases is wrong, the fact is I believe in a woman’s right to choose… responsibly.
My mother started her career as a midwife in England back in the 70′s. At that time all hospitals were mandated to perform abortions and England was the only country where they were readily available.
Even though she doesn’t agree with abortion in theory, the medical professional in her understands that it needs to be a legally proteced medical procedue. She has seen the effects of botched back alley abortions which can result in scarring, greater susceptibilty to endometriosis and uterine cancer as well as death. I personally know two women who will never be able to have children because they lived in countries where abortion was illegal. One was raped by her cousin.
you know if young prepubescent women were allowed to witness live abortions, birth control would not be a problem. As someone who has been in the room when one was performed (don’t ask) let me just say that that is something I never want to experience. EVER!
I am pro choice all the way! primarily because poor people don’t have much choices in life, and I’ve been in the room when priests and other moral high minded people have convinced young women to keep their children and I often times have left the room shaking my head because I know all they did was to continue the cycle of poverty. I agree with most of you that it should not be used as a form of birth control, but damn no one should be able to regulate my reproductive rights. Let me face the music with my higher power.
O.M.G. **actually mouthing “o.m.g” as i type**
i am STARING at the chart right now lol. it’s taped above my desk in my lab (why i’m actually in lab at this time of night is even more laughable). the flowchart makes me happy by making me feel as absurd as she sounds.
ha! *high five* Gem.
*hi 5*
feel like she’s setting women back with all her nonsense, f^uckery and tomfoolery.
It’s true.
naw, i’m with you. i find her entertaining too. the only problem is that she’s serious. like, Bush, who i also find highly entertaining and will miss in a way once he leaves office. however, i will only miss him b/c he seems like the kind of cat you can sit and be ignant around with no repercussions. he just seems like a fun grandpa. world leader? no so much.
“naw, i’m with you. i find her entertaining too. the only problem is that she’s serious. like, Bush, who i also find highly entertaining and will miss in a way once he leaves office. however, i will only miss him b/c he seems like the kind of cat you can sit and be ignant around with no repercussions. he just seems like a fun grandpa. world leader? no so much.”
you know, i actually don’t dislike bush. i just look at him as a dude with daddy issues who’s in way over his head. part of me actually feels sorry for him
“you know, i actually don’t dislike bush. i just look at him as a dude with daddy issues who’s in way over his head. part of me actually feels sorry for him”
Currently reading the Bush Tragedy (this along with the book “the N word” gets a lot of sideway looks from the caucasians on DC metro) . . . But anyway, that book would really make you feel bad for him . . . them mfers got issues!
i can’t wait til “W” comes out on the big screen. that should be a good film. i’m excited!
“i can’t wait til “W” comes out on the big screen. that should be a good film. i’m excited!”
did you see oliver stone on bill maher last week?
nah. i’ve missed the last few weeks of BM. i’ll try to OnDemand it.
I actually wanna see W too. I’m thinking it will be straight comedy.
i didnt see him on bill maher, but i did see when he was on colbert and that was hilarious!
Oliver Stone is a great American.
I’m looking forward to seeing W.
i don’t feel sorry for him, cause he SHOULD have known better. but i don’t dislike for the bush family either…dubya (and the sibs) just have some issues trying to live up to daddy.
but imo, neither of those dudes should have been president of anything, much less the US.
Palin=Caribou Barbie, and if I were Barbie I would be offended at the comparison
*giggles* I called her “Moosejaw Barbie” on FB the other day…but I think I like Caribou better! Hayle, if McCain HAD chosen Barbie as a running mate, she’d still be more qualified than Palin!
Hmm, i’m afraid to answer. I’m probably my very own worst enemy (not to be confused with either my nemesis or arch enemy).
please, breakdown your definitions of each (enemy, nemesis, and arch nemesis)
My enemy is any person who opposes my interests.
My nemesis is the one particular person who is most of the time successful in opposing my interests.
My archenemy is the one particular person who has either caused me such (usually psychological) pain in the past or is so evenly matched with me, that even though his opposing of me never completely succeeds, I spend the most time attempting to deal with him (or her) because we are so evenly matched or I have so much issues dealing with her (or him), that all my efforts are frustrated.
Keep in mind that these are active parties. Not only do they attempt to stop thwart my actions, they also go further towards causing me further ruin and pain. Passive opposers, those who are content with just stopping me for getting what I want are called “haters”.
you sound eerily similar to a super hero…… hhmmm….
chuck klosterman broke this down in one of his books (“sex, drugs, and cocca puffs”, i think) as well. i always enjoy breakdowns
“i always enjoy breakdowns”
Is that what they call women of ill repute in the burgh?
that’s one of my favourite books!! – you know, next to war and peace and mrs dalloway and whatnot… i am the worst english major of all time.
“Not only do they attempt to stop thwart my actions…”
thwart def isn’t used enough in every day vernacular. i enjoyed seeing it in your comment, kam.
well, besides jim jones–for no reason other than my ex-SO used to sing that damn ballin’ song all the damn time and i hated whoever made it before i realized that it was jim jones, a person who’s name i did not know until then and had been thought of in my mind as ‘that dude that hangs with cam’ron.’
and he looks hella dirty.
sarah palin is too easy but damn it, its true and she’s on the list.
do these have to be people we actually know? cause ‘ol waiter boy at the red tavern restaurant was about to have me leap out of my booth and stab him in the neck with my spoon. rude people are always on the list.
the 2520′s at my job for reasons that would keep me up until when i actually have to be at work in the morning. but let’s just say i have to call on Kang Jesus numerous times every day along with reminding myself to fix my face.
Kang Jesus
I know you’re really from the South now…lol
jim jones is SO dirty…he’s like the black pigpen and whatnot…
yeah, i remember Fresh from Crunktastical used to call him the Dirt Angel. slayed me every time i read it.
oh my…fresh used to slay me OFTEN with that right there!
“yeah, i remember Fresh from Crunktastical used to call him the Dirt Angel”
this made me choke on my pancakes, steak, and eggs
uh…. when can i be invited to breakfast?!?!?! im drooling on my keyboard….
maybe when you fix that drooling problem
touche
Speaking of Crunktastical, one time someone on there left a comment and said the reason Jim Jones and Cam’Ron aren’t friends anymore, is because JJ was tired of Cam saying he smelled like Newports and Salami.
I hollered!
The comments section on C+D goes hard in the paint.
They don’t play in there!!!
LOL excellent choic with jim jones!
My least favourite person in America? Thats simply. the grand poobah of fellatio, Mr Sean Hannity. I just want him to not be alive anymore. Ive pleaded with his heart several times to stop pumping blood into that douchebag, but no luck yet.
“Ive pleaded with his heart several times to stop pumping blood into that douchebag, but no luck yet.”
damn! that’s rough.but you know…prayer works…ok, we are both going to hell. lol.
“Ive pleaded with his heart several times to stop pumping blood into that douchebag, but no luck yet.”
this is a darn good plea.
you should check out his profile on d!ckipedia…its good sh!t
Ive pleaded with his heart several times to stop pumping blood into that douchebag, but no luck yet.
This made me spit out my Quaker Oats Weight Control Oatmeal.
i’m gonna go ahead and pull a Palin and say i’m not going to answer the question. instead, i’m going to talk about what’s dangling at the very neuron tips of my frontal cortex….
~KGeezy!!!!~ who is prob one of my favoritist persons at this very moment. he was just in MY [temp] city, at MY school playin ball. on the same court as LBJ (that dude is cold), no less. and i’m pretty sure KG winked at me when he made his last shot before peacin out the game.
*batting eyelashes* ohhhh man, i think i’m in luuuuhv.
nicely done my friend!
thanks, shat. wait, that shortening of your name doesn’t quite seem flattering. my bad.
oh, and to answer your question from the previous post–i’d do…errr umm…i mean choose mcsteamy. what can i say?? he gets me misty.
not flattering, but makes me giggle everytime! lol
and yes, mcSteamy is known for causing rainforest type climates…
McSteamy is that hotness. Torres better come back over that team and quickly…
lol i know that’s right. how do you give up mcsteamy parts for hahn parts??
Blasphemy!
“not flattering, but makes me giggle everytime!”
***surprised that the 8th wonder hasn’t come up with a joke incorporating the champ and this quote yet***
Wonder woman is having a crummy day.
Though knowing I make you tingle in anticipation makes it better.
And by better I mean, pretty much the same.
Hey just wanted to know if Shatani is ur real name???? It’s mine and it was weird seeing it on the site. lol But my least favorite person right now would beeeee Sarah Palin. I gag every time I see her or hear her voice. She has the IQ of an 8th grader. lol Wait make that 6th grader. and she needs to get contacts it’s 2008 and glasses no longer make you look smart when everything that comes out of your mouth is garbage. Good day!
actually, no its not…ive never met a shatani before! mine is actually tanisha, so its just a clever nickname for me.
did you throw your thong at him or just hand it to him as he walked out the gym?
“did you throw your thong at him or just hand it to him as he walked out the gym”
she threw the thong. sadly, her aim is terrible and it hit doc rivers in the face.
gem, did doc give you your thong back?
nah, he asked if he could keep it. i said what the hay, i got plenty more back at the crib. i may fedex another pair to KG once the reg season starts. so it’s all good.
thanks for checkin tho.
the champ is always concerned about the undergarment situations of his peoples….