The Dos And Don’ts Of Sending And Receiving Nude Pics » VSB

Dating, Relationships, & Sex, Featured

The Dos And Don’ts Of Sending And Receiving Nude Pics

sex-tape-review-2In July, GQ Magazine ran a companion piece for the movie Sex Tape, the ridiculously titled “We Strenuously Fact-checked the Entire Premise of Sex Tape: An Investigation.” In this feature, Lauren Bans contacted an Apple Genius and rattled off “hypothetical” situations taken from the movie to see just how possible it would be for someone to view pics and vids in the cloud that weren’t their’s.

Apple: Videos can be backed up to iCloud, but what that means is the video would be saved as, like, a backup. But you wouldn’t be able to share it with anyone. No one can go into the iCloud and watch the video.

GQ: Okay. So let’s say I made my sex video, and somehow it got into the Cloud, and then I gave iPads as gifts to a hundred of my friends and family. What are the chances they would ever get that sex video on their iPads?

Apple: Impossible. They can’t connect to your iPad over, like, a network and just get info. You would be the one who has control.

GQ: Okay, that’s so good to know. Do you guys have an official policy on sex videos? I assume you probably hear from people like me a lot.

Apple: …there’s not really a policy on that. What you do is your personal business and that’s your own privacy…the only thing you can really know is, we’re just not liable for if something got out there.

Who would’ve known that just three days into the month of September we’d be living the contradiction to these very claims, with the illegally hacked images of Jennifer Lawrence, Jill Scott and God knows who else being leaked on the internet.

I won’t get into the stupid-ass fucking conversation that sounds something like “well, they shouldn’t have been taking pictures if they didn’t want them to get leaked.” Why? Well, because it’s a stupid-ass fucking conversation. They are grown-ups who have sex with other grown-ups. Many grown-ups — included many reading this right now — take intimate pictures and videos, and share them with people they’re romantically involved with. There is an expectation of privacy with this exchange, and there is NOTHING WRONG WITH DOING THAT.

Instead, being the nude pic prodigy that I am, I decided to gather a few rules of etiquette for the sharing of sexy pictures, learned from my years of, um, sexy picture taking (and receiving).

First rule of the game is never ask for nudes. There’s absolutely no sexy or remotely appealing way to ask to see another person’s privates unless you’re in close physical proximity to each other and someone is, in fact, about to get the business. Asking for nudes, especially from someone you haven’t had sex with yet, on a scale of one to sexual predator would probably score you a solid Stevie J. The other person should feel comfortable and confident on their own IF they decide to send, which leads me to my next point…

Never send unsolicited nudes. The problem with unsolicited nudes isn’t the surprise, it’s that it’s usually the absolute wrong damn time to receive them. We all love the fantasy of receiving dirty pics to save our mind from a boring meeting, but the reality is that it can be a huge distraction. Not to mention it’s a little more difficult for us guys to conceal our enthusiasm than it is for women. It’s always awkward explaining you need a few minutes to gather your notes when everyone is leaving the conference room, and that’s just on a good day. Sending nudes when I’m in a bad mood and our relationship is just casual [redacted], is the quickest way to get curved out of the rotation.

So now you’re probably asking “If I can’t ask for them, and I can’t send them on my own, when CAN I send them, Ryan?” As cliché as it is, you’ll know when. If you’re in a relationship, seriously dating or have some type of regular physical relationship, these rules don’t apply. But if you haven’t reached that yet, the time for you will come soon after the first time your conversation trends to bedroom activities.

We’ve all been there, innocent chit chat turns into “Oh I know how to put it down” which leads into likes and dislikes and then the rest is history. Once you’ve reached that point, it’s ok so send a few teasers or thirst traps to test the waters before you deliver the whole sha-bangy-bang.

And when you do…make sure you’re sending to someone you trust. You would think that it’d be common sense that not everyone is deserving of, or can be trusted with your nudes but careless people never cease to amaze. I’m not saying that anyone deserves to have their privacy violated, but there’s absolutely a risk you run when putting something valuable in someone else’s hands.

The next point is a bit reactive, maybe even petty, but it is what it is. Always collect insurance. And it’s not as simple as having their nudes too. Sometimes you need shots or footage of the other person in a compromising position. You also have to know what their triggers are. It would never ruffle my feathers if my nudes leaked, but if you were to catch me sleeping, or watching my Beyonce DVD’s I’d probably jump off a cliff. Again, this isn’t the most honorable line of defense, but it gets real out here in these tweets.

Let’s say the worst happens and for some reason your nudes do leak, it would be even more frustrating to be looking at one generic shot that got sent to multiple bae’s and being able to know who the culprit was. Combat this by sending unique nudes to each recipient. I know it’s taxing trying to take new pics from your favorite angles all over again but at least this way you’ll know exactly who has what, and with these strict new Jennifer Lawrence Standards, someone. will. pay.

The sixth and final rule is simple and to the point, no face, no scandal. We’ve actually all heard this, or some version of this before. For me, again I’m a pro at this, even with my tattoos, I know exactly what lighting to shoot under and what angles to hit to get a great shot of a nearly indistinguishable brown-skinned man. Know your angles, that’s a free bonus.

While this is definitely 48% jokes, it’s important to stress just how damaging and disrespectful sharing someone’s nude pictures, which they trusted to you, can be. I’d tell you the only safe way to interact is abstinence but it’s also 2014. And you hoes aint loyal.

May the odds be ever in your favor, bro/sis.

Ryan Sides

Ryan Sides is a writer and content producer based in New York, but Dallas to the core. His sign is the Krispy Kreme "Hot" light and he enjoys long walks to the refrigerator. Chat him up on Twitter about music, food and being in love with being in love.

  • LadyIbaka

    Jill said, “it wasn’t me”…apparently that Jill had thigh gap issues, which she doesn’t suffer from, and you sir? I wish Ibaka would bless us with one or two—->faints at the THOughTage

    • When you have plausible deniability, you take it

    • Val

      She said one was her and the other wasn’t. But, they were both taken in the same bathroom! Lol

      • Yeah it was obviously her but then u realize we had no business seeing these in the first place so cant really call her on it

  • This is more about sending than taking. I”m here for the tips and tricks on the proper angles and shots.

    • Jay

      Context is important. The Comcast remote is a favorite nowadays er um… so I’m told.

      • Which is precisely why I don’t touch dudes remotes….

        • Amber

          Which is my when i stay in hotels i clean the remote before i watch TV. I think the remote had to be on the top 5 list of dirtiest things in a room

          • Easily, i cant see a housekeeper even thinking to wipe down a remote

      • Naw. I’m not big on the floating p*nis comparison photos.

        • LMNOP

          Yeah, don’t do just the peen.

          • Neptunes presents The Clones

            Ey,i thought you were all about peen

          • I always try to get the tummy in now.

      • And there’s always DirecTV remotes. :)

      • That has always been so corny to me lol….Every single time I got a pic with a remote as context, I’ve scoffed OUT LOUD. On some “aye bae, look….my paynus almost reaches the menu button”

        TUHHHHH

        • Neptunes presents The Clones

          Who uses remote controls,real Gs use rolling pi…..

          • IcePrincess

            Bwahahaaaa you sir, are a mess!

          • Bye Sahel

          • kidvideo

            Real office working G’s use staplers.

          • PhlyyPhree

            Sir….

        • Jay

          lol @ menu button. If you’re not larger than said item then #youredoingitwrong

      • PhlyyPhree

        I hate the comcast remote almost as much as I hate the glade air freshener. Let me tell you something, I don’t NEED or WANT something that size invading my castle. That’s just rude

        • But what if they go through the proper negotiations or preparations? They might be able to give you a good time. Besides, you can stretch. -)

          • PhlyyPhree

            That they complete the preflight checklist is a forgone conclusion. I’m not saying I DON’T like heft, but I’m too old to be sore for a week afterwards. Besides in my experience finding someone who knows that size means nothing withour good technique is akin to finding a damn unicorn.

        • Neptunes presents The Clones

          Have you ever won any athletic competition

          • PhlyyPhree

            Yes….???

            • Neptunes presents The Clones

              Which sport or discipline if i may ask

              • PhlyyPhree

                Track. Why?

                • Neptunes presents The Clones

                  Just curious,you look familiar is all. And if you ran track then you can can take the D

                  • PhlyyPhree

                    Lol. Oh. Okayyy. I have a “twin” though.

                • Medium Meech

                  Track girls are the absolute best. That is all.

                  • PhlyyPhree

                    I once had an ex tell me he approached me strictly because I ran track. Lol. Thanks darlin

                  • Facts only

                  • Jay

                    I would elbow my way through a crowd of track girls to get to a volleyball team.

                    • Heavens2Murgatroid

                      I hear you on that, but have you seen those soccer thighs….

                • Val

                  What event?

                  • PhlyyPhree

                    1, 2 and 4×2. Tried the 110 hurdles TWICE in life. Never again.

                    • Val

                      I love the 200. Hurdles are for masochists. Lol But, I love watching the hurdles.

                    • PhlyyPhree

                      I was theeee laziest runner ever. Like I was good enough to win, but anything longer than the 200 and I was like “damn…am I STILL running?”

                      I don’t know what possessed me to do hurdles. Guess it was because I had big thighs and the coaches thought I had all this jumping power. Either that or they were racist and thought black girls could jump. Me no know. Lol

                    • Neptunes presents The Clones

                      The big thighs part deserves an upvote

                    • PhlyyPhree

                      They are the only part of my body that NEVER changes regardless of weight loss or gain. I do NOT understand. Smh

                    • Val

                      Well, at least you managed to avoid the 400. That is the most torturous event in all of sport.

                • Epsilonicus

                  Val done prolly seen you before.

                  • Neptunes presents The Clones

                    Yeah,you know Val,she loves it when they run

                    • Val

                      Codswallop

                  • Val

                    Lol. Probably. Even though Universal Sports is killing my track groove.

                • Val

                  He’s taking notes. He has dossiers on all VSS.

                  • Neptunes presents The Clones

                    This is not true.

                    • PhlyyPhree

                      It isn’t?

                    • Neptunes presents The Clones

                      What do you take me for..as much as i enjoy the VSS on here most do not strike me as truly conscious of a world outside the US. So it would not be productive for me to profile them

                    • PhlyyPhree

                      I don’t take you for anything. Just inquiring. I told you, I’m intrigued

                    • Neptunes presents The Clones

                      I like learning and cornrows.

                  • PhlyyPhree

                    I’m starting to wonder…

    • LMNOP

      I guess this isn’t really gender neutral, but a really great angle to take a pic of your azz is standing up from below your azz at a slight angle. Or so I’ve heard lol

      • Isn’t that some sort of new rule to take photos from that angle? LOL Ask me how I know…

        • LMNOP

          It’s a good angle.

          • This is true. It is a flattering angle. If you look bad from that angle, you just have no booty.

      • Only gay men are interested in azz pics of men.

        • LMNOP

          I appreciate men’s azzes.

          • *gets back to squatting and lunges*

  • Neptunes presents The Clones

    Nude pics live forever so make sure you make them as spectacular as possible with artistic flair that incorporates the aspects of light and shadow that will help to bring out the best that you have to offer. This is mostly aimed at

    • Andrea

      Did you like the dress?

      • ????????????

      • Neptunes presents The Clones

        Oui

      • I need to follow you on Instagram. LOL

  • SuperStrings

    Can we implement a rule around proper background? Like, make sure I can’t see your laundry pile behind you, or your jacked up bathroom. Also, I see VSB got some upgrades. Congratulations guys.

    • Jay

      Right. I’m stuck on old VSB. Every time I come here nowadays I’m like….

      http://www.picgifs.com/reaction-gifs/reaction-gifs/confused/confused033.gif

      • b sweet

        #heyboo
        Please don’t let the newness detract you. I need to see your comments more.

        • Jay

          I already told you B Sweet I’m not sending you any “nudes”. Stop trying to butter me up!

          • b sweet

            i save the butter for the cupcakes.
            With you, I don’t even need it. You give me what I need from the neck up.

    • Amber

      Yes please clean up before you take pics. I’ve had friends show me pics from random dudes and I’m usually too distracted by the mess in the background to evaluate the guy.

      • LMNOP

        Alternatively, just move to an angle where the mess isn’t visible and/or clean just the area that will be in the background.

        • Amber

          lol that will work too

      • Karma for sharing said photos

      • cakes_and_pies

        That’s how you know a person sends out photos often. Disheveled background, filthy mirrors, and cluttered counter-tops indicate they do that often. See: Benzino’s nude bathroom pic.

    • LMNOP

      Hey! Welcome back! We missed you.

    • AMEN on the laundry pile. At least move it, crop it or blur it out. I don’t need to know how messy you really are. :)

      • PhlyyPhree

        Filters aren’t just for #selfies

    • Dont go on an unannounced hiatus like that ever again, ya hear????

      *begrudgingly snuggles you*

    • menajeanmaehightower

      Where you been?

    • Lea Thrace

      Look who it is! You have been missed SS. Had us sending bat signals and ish.

    • Agatha Guilluame

      My nucca! Welcome home kid.

    • Welcome back Strings!

    • BreezyX2

      *hands SS a slice of warm banana bread* YEW BETTA NOT LEAVE US AGAIN!!!

    • God Shammgod

      SS comes back to a slew of pannies being thrown at him. Homie you know how to make a grand return, lol

  • Pretty much everything I said on my blog #nopromo. Also, suggestive pics > nudes, let my creep mind run free

    • LMNOP

      Yeah, I am partial to the sequential strip tease pics, but I always leave something on. Maybe end with one where I’m holding the edge of my panties like I’m about to take them off, but that’s it.

      • You the real MVP

      • Rachmo

        *takes notes*

        • Lea Thrace

          She got us out here learning.

      • Medium Meech

        But the smiling bubble… and the grass… this is like finding out that the Easter bunny can’t live within 1000 feet of a school or day care center.

        • LMNOP

          I mean, I don’t do this often, but when I do, I do it well.

          And the wholesome innocence seems to be half the appeal.

    • Epsilonicus

      Meh. It is all or nothing

      • Lea Thrace

        That’s a married people luxury!

        • Epsilonicus

          Is it? I did not know that

          • Lea Thrace

            marriage privilege!

  • Well, truth be told, Apple didn’t contradict itself lol. The celebrities were hacked plain and simple, and the fact is few people read those terms and services agreement policies (which are purposely long and full with legalese). That being said, if it’s online, it’s not private. The internet is filled with teens whose life ambition is to do some form of social engineering and penetrate people’s security.

    Fact is privacy is dead, has been for quite some time.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DaYn_PkrfvQ

    • Neptunes presents The Clones

      NOBOBY ever reads the fine print. I read the fine print and i’m amazed at what people agree to,especially with facebook. But give it the guys at reddit lol,they setup a cancer donation to wash the guilt away lol

      • Amber

        I think the charity that they tried to give it to declined the donation though

    • Negro Libre, we share a brain so often, it’s scary. :)

  • LMNOP

    Serious question. At what point do you talk to your kids about things like if you send a nekkid pic, don’t get your face in it. This seems like a really awkward but important conversation.

    • Same time as the s*x discussion I’d imagine.

      • LMNOP

        People (and schools) generally do the secks discussion several years before the kids are even remotely interested in all that, and I think it might be overkill at that point. And also, how do you even bring that up. I’m thinking maybe when a kid is old enough for their own phone you could talk about phone safety. Or maybe talk about it hypothetically, like when current events give you an opening and say “it’s much harder for people to identify a naked picture if the person’s face isn’t in it.

        • Well ideally, as a non-patent mind you, there would be one discussion. But multiple across years.

        • Aly

          I always use current events as a springboard for deeper discussions with my son. Works like a charm. He thinks we’re having an adult conversation, and I get to share my motherly wisdom without being annoying :-) Win-win.

          As far as the nekkid pic talk, I agree with you and Ricky. I think it should happen in stages. Probably when they get a phone and again when you have the se x talk(s).

          • Neptunes presents The Clones

            I disgree,this should happen way before they get a phone. This is the age of everything going digital. Kids learn these things very early thanks to school

            • menajeanmaehightower

              Agreed.

            • Aly

              Well, luckily there’s more than one way to parent. The only wrong answer would be to not talk to them about it at all.

          • kidvideo

            Would u rather have that convo wit ur son or
            daugther?

            My mum told me and my big bro(when we were teens)that boys
            are easier to give the chex talk to.

            She didnt want to deal with those teen girl/mother conflicts.

            • Aly

              Hmm, I’m not sure. I’ve never had to have the talk with a girl before. I’d imagine it wouldn’t be that much different though.

        • PunchDrunkLove

          Not remotely interested? If you start talking between 10 – 12, you’re on schedule….maybe. If you start around 15, you’re late. All things considered, nowadays, it’s almost never too early. I wouldn’t say talk to kids around 6 or 7, but I’ll say (for today’s society) around 8 start thinking about how to broach. When I say almost never too early, I don’t think children are thinking in terms of having schex, but curiosity kicks in, crushing on each other, bodies changing, so forth and so on.

          Nature ain’t waiting. I didn’t start wearing a training bra until the summer between the 8th and 9th grades, that’s what 13/14?. Not so much now. By 8th/ 9th grade, the average kid/girl is well on her way, starting to fill out. When my kid was in middle school, I was blown away at the maturity of the girls….yes, middle school. Boobs, backsides, provocatively dress. With this being a schex crazed society, and just everything at their fingertips and in your face, I’d say get a jump on it. No only for reasons of teaching about life, but equally to protect them from all the crap that goes on.

          • LMNOP

            I’m doing the chex talk at 8 because they do it the year after in school, and apparently kids start crying, so I figure I can’t do worse. Although so far I started laughing when I was explaining how babies come out.

            • PunchDrunkLove

              Good for you!!

    • menajeanmaehightower

      When they start using the internet or get their first phone. Kids get caught up in a lot because they are gullible, young, and vulnerable.

    • RewindingtonMaximus

      The minute you decide you should put a phone or camera in their hand. Lets be honest here. Everybody here must have had a toy camera or something like that as a kid. Go ahead. Pretend you didn’t put on your best explorer’s hat and not investigate your goods when you were 8. We were all curious. Now take that curiosity and multiply it with how important we make pictures today. That’s what kids have to deal with now.

      • afronica

        I agree with you (no surprise there). I started playing doctor around 8. I’m seeing at least a few kids now around that age carrying smartphones. And even if your kid has not phone the first, someone at school or in the neighborhood will have one. I’d think 8 would be a good time to have the first of a couple of talks about this.

        • RewindingtonMaximus

          Agreed, 8 sounds reasonable when Amazon wants to make creepy commericals with kids acting like full grown hipsters using their creepy phone

    • IsitFridayyet?

      I would say the sooner the better not just for advising them to be as discrete as possible but the legal ramifications as well. It is just as important to talk about sharing the nude pictures of others since they can be charged for distributing child P_rn for sharing pictures of themselves and others who are underage in some states.

  • Freebird

    I’m team do what you do. But I salute the courage of others on this one, especially considering the voyeuristic nature of the world we live in now. For reasons that dont always make sense folks get reckless, especially old lovers. I dont trust nann ninja enough to send naked pics over the nets….not apple, google, or the current. I always feel that if its that serious show up and give a live show or let a ninja draw a picture. Get out the kiddy pool and be bout that life.

    • Neptunes presents The Clones

      Would you let me take a picture then ???

      • Freebird

        Did you really mean this for me?

        • b sweet

          Although I too was in the boat who wasn’t entirely certain of your gender, this matter has been cleared up
          @disqus_S01S08gg94:disqus FREEBIRD IS A MAN!! Still wanna take a pic?

        • camilleblu

          I just wanted to pop in and say that I’m not sure why so many people have been so confused about your gender…*looks over shoulder to see where @menajeanhightower is, leans in*…I’ve always known that you’re all man. Have a great weekend.

          • afronica

            I’ve been confused about people’s confusion, as well. Free struck me as extra manly from day one. Good eye on your part, per usual.

          • Epsilonicus

            If I aint know any better I would have thought you were…

            • camilleblu

              Thought I was what?

              • Epsilonicus

                Being a bit friendly

                • camilleblu

                  Lol…I’m just stating the obvious eps, just stating the obvious.

      • Misfire.

        • Freebird

          for real T….

      • Val

        Lol! I am so disappointed in you. You’re a spy for goodness sake. You need to do better and take better notes.

        • Neptunes presents The Clones

          Hey,hey,hey

          • Val

            Fat Albert?

  • 1) D!ck pics are never attractive
    2) Unsolicited d!ck pics can ruin your day AND lose you the chance at some chex
    3) Pikachu pics really arent that great either (cept for our Queen Amber Rose–her love box is what dreams are made of)
    4) Im very very very comfortable in my skin, and spent most of my 20’s as close to nude as possible
    5) I will never run for political office cuz I’on have time for a scandal
    6) A great nudie is one featuring svelte curves and silhouettes and other tantalizing innuendo
    7) Dont save your nudes on a cloud. Duh. Save em in that “Tax Documents” folder on your desktop like the good lord intended.

    • Or install keepsafe for your phone.. There’s even apps that don’t even show up in your apps you gotta dial a number to open it…….technology is amazing

      • *leans in* oh really? Do tell more…..

      • Neptunes presents The Clones

        I would advise avoiding apps,these things get remotely updated and those updates are usually laden with back doors that only the programmer knows about. There is no true privacy on smart phones

        • Lea Thrace

          Y’all need to listen to the anonymous deity known as Sahel. He knows!

          • Neptunes presents The Clones

            Nah,it’s basic knowledge. If you code something then you can leave loopholes that only you can access. It’s like the guy who sells safes but has a default key for all of them

            • Lea Thrace

              Basic to you and me. Not so much the vast majority of the world that uses smartphones/internet. The number of people ignorant to what EULAs and awful awful security protocols and loopholes can do to their lives scare me.

              • Kozy

                talk. about. it.

    • I think I’ve taken two or the aesthetically pleasing ones. ( ._.)

      • BreezyX2

        *looks at Malik….goes to Google….flips through binder….looks back up at Malik…looks over glasses* Ohhhhh ooooookkkkk

    • About Pikachu pics…I’m all over the map. There are some pretty ones out there, but you aren’t tell how pretty that looks based on their overall looks. Odd…

      • Jay

        Yeah, the pic is not pretty 90% of the time but I always felt that it was more about the fact that she was willing to send it. THAT’S the real win in it all.

    • Neptunes presents The Clones

      Sigh and i was going to do number one just for you

    • Rachmo

      Number one and two are gospel. No one wants a d!ck pic

      • PhlyyPhree

        Wellllll now, wayment…..
        It just has to be the RIGHT d!ck pic…

        • Rachmo

          No ma’am. No such thing exists. A print pic though…

          • Lea Thrace

            Nah. You just havent had the right one sent to you.

            I was like you once. Naive to the game. But just wait till your bae hits you off with the right angle and lighting. You’ll change your mind.

            • Rachmo

              Hand on heart. I haven ever been sent a d!ck pic from a non-boyfriend. I’m not sure what about me says DO NOT SEND but this is my truth.

              • Lea Thrace

                That’s a GOOD truth. The unsolicited is thee worst.

              • PhlyyPhree

                THAT is an amazing feat. Nothing worse than unsolicited bad d!ck pics. That can induce periods of celibacy, ask me how I know.

          • PhlyyPhree

            Don’t get me wrong, print pics are also a gift from God

            • afronica

              Print pics make you want to investigate. *puts on deerstalker*

            • miss t-lee

              Yes ma’am!

        • Aly

          Thank you! I was like, oh, we’re not supposed to like d!ck pics now?

          • PhlyyPhree

            I need him to prescreen with someone else and make sure that a) it’s large enough to show well in pictures even with the 10lbs the camera adds and b) it’s not ashy, lumpy or ill formed, but other than that… I’m cool with them.

            • Aly

              Lol @ prescreen

      • LadyIbaka

        I want! But it can only be black and big and lotioned up.

        • Neptunes presents The Clones

          TMI

        • kidvideo

          So…No Highlighters?

      • Jay

        Bunni plays for the other team so… her opinion makes sense, but you guys are flexing like nobody wants to see men naked. I call BS. Aye…SOMEBODY out here is looking at d*ck pics.

        • Rachmo

          D!cks aren’t that nice to look at. Abs, arms, a chexy smile, sure. But really the only time I, Rachmo, am interested in seeing your d!ck is when you are with me in person, in a dimly lit room, ready to *redacted*.

        • BreezyX2

          NOPE, NAWL, NO ONE! Why would anyone want to get a picture of a stick with one condemning eye?!? No one wants to see that mess.

          • Jay

            I mean… yeah…. when you say it like that. For the record my “eye” isn’t condemning, it’s a suggestive wink ;)

        • God Shammgod

          #datprint >>>> #datrichard…. when will you guys ever learn. Nothing outside of tight boxer briefs will have you WINNING…or so I’ve heard. From a friend.

          • BreezyX2

            Youseahoe

            • God Shammgod

              *looks up at Breezy’s hypothetical situation* takes one to know one.

              • BreezyX2

                *clutches pearls* Why eye never!!!

          • All I will say is that it’s a matter for tools for the job. #seewhatididthere Sometimes it’s the print, sometimes it’s the raw D. I tailor my approach. :)

            ETA: Then again, I’m apparently the Lebron James to this kink ish, when I’m more like Shaun Livingston or Thabo Sefolosha. I know some veteran who will have you begging for the deity of your choice and would son me in a minute.

          • Jay

            Not that I’m fighting for the proliferation of the Richard Pichard but… I’ve never had a bad experience sending one. No humblebrag.

          • Eh

          • Respectfully disagree. only 1 print pick would make it into my top 10 irresponsible Malik photos.

    • b sweet

      6. I always wondered about this. I took a picture of myself in a bra, showed it to my friend to get her opinion, and she said if i ever sent it to a dude trying to be sexy he would not be impressed, cause all they want is nekkid. i was so deflated. My first attempt at a sexy selfie was a no go according to my friend. Apparently I’m not about this life.

      • Epsilonicus

        Its all nude errthang or dont send at all

        • b sweet

          *sits on the bench and drinks gatorade*
          In that case, I’m out coach.

          • Don’t listen to Eps, let that cleavage flourish

            • Epsilonicus

              Yeah there is.

              Aint no such thing as halfway crooks

              • Neptunes presents The Clones

                She may have a bouncy pair

            • b sweet

              Thanks Tristan. I knew I could count on you to appreciate my subtle sexy.

            • Epsilonicus

              Let it flourish. Outside the confines of a bra

      • My sexytime pics turned into all out roleplay for me….props, lighting, getting into character….shooot, my last avi was just a cropped version of [signal drops]

        • Neptunes presents The Clones

          BRING IN EMERGENCY GENERATORS AND BOOSTERS STAT

          • BWAHAHAHAHA *disappears off radar*

        • b sweet

          I know exactly what pic you’re talking about. I always wondered about the context. I thought it was some sort of glamour shot lol

          • It was part of a series of pics I sent my #Husbae at the time lol

          • afronica

            It was so peekaboo. Cracked me up.

  • First, I would like to say #teamandroid. My cloud storage ain’t loyal, and no one group has enough pics to nail the kid. I also don’t show my face with my peen either solo or with companionship, though there are some women who like to have their face up on it. Who am I to deny them if they so choose? ;-) Some of them look at it as a trophy to claim. And who am I to deny them? *Herman Cain smile*

    Still, that people have to be told to take a few precautions is silly. People have always had that secret stash of stuff they don’t want the world to know. Why get all sloppy because it’s the internet’s responsibility instead of in your own house? Think about it for more than a few seconds, then have fun. Besides, there’s nothing like a cleavage pic or a shot of a nice booty in tight pants to loosen me up and tighten up my own pants. :)

    Oh, by the way, I signed the final papers. I’m free motherf*ckers!!!!!
    http://cdn0.sbnation.com/imported_assets/1895867/FYq7M_gif_2520.gif

    • kidvideo

      I bet u got that Ursher song on a loop.

      • Which song?

        • PhlyyPhree

          ….I’m gonna guess papers?

          https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AAqoGePi-bs

          But congrats on your freedom!

          • Word. We didn’t have to cross paths because of the ex’s health issues. Glad it isn’t my problem anymore. Then again, she did that mess to herself. Apparently, I made the mistake of marrying into a family that doesn’t care about health issues until they fall out in public despite 50-11 warnings. LOL

        • kidvideo

          Papers…youtube it.

    • b sweet

      Congratulations are in order, right?

More Like This