The Definitive List Of The 10 Least Likable Black People » VSB

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The Definitive List Of The 10 Least Likable Black People

Yung Berg (Jesse Grant/Getty Images)

 

Watching Yung Berg on Love and Hip-Hop Hollywood last night reminded me of how historically unlikable he is. Which made me wonder where he’d rank on a list of the least likable Black people, which then made me wonder who else would be on the list.

10. Wendy Williams

Has made a career out of being unlikable. Which, in a way, is admirable. Has made unlikability performance art.

9. The woman at the post office who always looks and acts like she’s getting fucked by a woodpecker

You know this woman. Maybe she doesn’t work at the post office. Maybe she works at the DMV. Or maybe she’s an ER receptionist. Either way you know her. And you hate her.

Perhaps she’s a really good person when she leaves work. And perhaps her shitty work disposition is due to some issues at home. But that doesn’t matter to you when you ask if she has a pencil, and you can hear her faintly mutter “niggas never come prepared” under her breath. Or when you say “Hi” and she responds with “What do you want?” and you totally know she’d say “What the fuck do you want?” if she was allowed to.

You start to feel bad about hating her. Because she’s probably someone’s mom. Maybe someone’s wife. And then you ask her for an extra document because you made a mistake filling out the first one, and she acts like you asked her for a kidney, and the hate returns.

8. Clarence Thomas

Hasn’t made many waves recently, but as long as there is a list of the least likable Black people, Clarence Thomas will be on it. He is least likable emeritus.

7. Stacey Dash

Is either the world’s most beautiful fool, or the world’s most foolish beauty. Either way, somehow manages to get 7% less likable every time she opens her mouth. Will definitely play @gopblackchick in a Lifetime biopic seven people will watch. Was also in Moving.

6. Mike Tirico

Extra-skeevy Black newsman for ESPN who doesn’t not admit to being Black. Like, seriously. I am not joking. He does not admit to being Black. Claims to be 100% Italian.

5. The Twitter Motherfucker

Could be a man or a woman. Doesn’t matter. Apparently exists just to diarrhea shitty opinion after shitty opinion. Hates everyone. Except bad bitches and Damian Lillard. Used to live in a basement or with a “roommate” but now somehow actually lives inside of cyperspace.

4. The guy who’s always on the corner

You hate that he’s always there, doing nothing but adding unsolicited commentary, taking up sidewalk space, and doing shit that has never been and will never be legal. He has been selling drugs for 17 years, and has not been good enough at his job to receive a promotion. You hate that women you care about might have to walk past him. You hate that he’s still wearing an un tied wave cap like he’s Method Man in 1994. You hate racial profiling and police harassment, but you are happy to see him get racially profiled and harassed by the police.

3. Lolo Jones

Loses everything except unlikability contests.

2. Floyd Mayweather

Acts like King Shit after winning boxing contests as an 130 pound man, which is like winning a national whipped cream eating contest. Although adult illiteracy is a serious issue, it will never not be funny that Floyd Mayweather — the undisputed douchebag champion of the world — reads like Simple Jack.

1. Yung Berg

Has absolutely no redeeming qualities. None. Not one. Makes shitty music only people fed syrup-laced Similac appreciate. Somehow manages to look like a salamander and a sloth at the same time. Has the most punchable face and countenance in the history of punchable faces and countenances. To call him a piece of shit would be an insult to shit. Shit would be offended and would start a petition demanding an apology.

Damon Young

Damon Young is the editor-in-chief of VSB. He is also a columnist for GQ.com And he's working on a book of essays to be published by Ecco (HarperCollins). Damon is busy. He lives in Pittsburgh, and he really likes pancakes. Reach him at damon@verysmartbrothas.com. Or don't. Whatever.

  • BeautifullyHuman

    Can we amend number 2 and add 50 cent? He’s such a c***. I don’t know if he and Floyd are having a lovers quarrel but both those ninjas need to pull their skirts down.

    And Mike Tirico isn’t Black? Say word? All I have to say is momma’s baby…daddy’s maybe. -_-

    • Jay Ess

      50 gave us a classic rap album that will be enjoyed for decades, while Floyd hasn’t contributed anything substantive to the community. 50 stays off the list for this reason…and because he can read.

    • 50 is an a**hole but hes amusing

      • Mayborn7

        Exactly.

    • Jimmy

      More like daddy’s “definitely not”.

  • Lea Thrace

    This I think may be the best post I have ever read on VSB. No hyperbole. Only facts.

  • Hilarious! And I’ve seen Mike Tirico close up in the flesh. This movie comes to mind when I saw that story. Now, there are some dark a$$ Italians out there, but they look Latin as opposed to full out Black. C’mon dog!

    • LadyIbaka

      there are black chinese too, there are black indians too, there are black everythang. motherphakka you is black!! When they go on a shooting spree, guess what they don’t see Italian, they see blackity black black.

      • And Lord are there some pretty Black Italians. Check out Mario Ballotelli’s girlfriend, Fanny Neguesha:
        http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2014/06/10/article-2653722-1E7E4BBD00000578-543_306x423.jpg

        • Trey

          I think she’s Belgian, but Gotdamn she fine.

          • Nick Peters

            They broke up. It means I have a chance

            • Now all I need is Rosetta Stone the Italian edition and…
              http://media1.giphy.com/media/MQQwcpjOLD64U/giphy.gif

              • PunchDrunkLove

                You men are funny when posts or pics of hot babes are posted.

            • Royale W. Cheese

              The Audacity of Hope, by Nick Peters :)

              • Nick Peters

                All I have to do is learn Italian, Get a job, Get a work permit, move to Italy, and happen to “run into her” and then I let my mouthpiece do the rest of the work

        • tgtaggie

          I need to hurry up and book this trip to Italy. lol

        • Epsilonicus

          I would like to play a game of just the tip with her

          • You, Sir, win the internet today. I am officially no bueno for the rest of the hour.

            • Epsilonicus

              *bows like a gentleman*

    • Not to mention, I read that book about the history of ESPN, and Mike Tirico is a d-bag who may or may not have assaulted a few women on the low during his time in Bristle….

      • Yikes

      • AmosBanks

        It wasn’t on the low. He was suspended because of it.

  • IcePrincess

    Go ahead and throw Kirk from LHHA on there too

    • BreezyX2

      Yes him and his violation of an Adam’s apple. What in da he!! is that thing doing? Gross!!!

      • tgtaggie

        I lost all respect for dude when he said that his wife getting preggers was interfering with his life plan. I was like…ain’t marriage about putting someone else needs above yours. *Ye shrug*

  • Agatha Guilluame

    Damn good post.

  • Skegeeaces

    Love it! How is Larry Elder not on this list, though?! I would say he’s not famous enough, but Mike Tirico made it.

  • Maximillian

    Is Young Berg’s chain still on tour?

    • LadyIbaka

      I never heard of this one…..is he part of young money or is the young in his name independent of them scarecrows?

  • LadyIbaka

    ” To call him a piece of sheet would be an insult to shit.” HOWLING!! Oh mi gosh!! Dang Champ, I am LOVING, like really phaKKING LOVING your writing post marriage!!
    Being phakked by a woodpecker- Tears!!

    -Floyd IS Napoleon (sp?)…..yes, I have peer reviewed stats to show from I’on’tgiveaphakk University

  • Melvin D. Clayton

    Can we add Don Lemon…I’m just saying.

    • LadyIbaka

      Oh m gosh, NO! I loves him. Yes, I know he has blondie moments, but he is soooo nice in person, and sooo handsome.

      • Craig

        Fuck Dom Lemon. That dude believes in Stop & Frisk laws in NYC ’cause he’s scared of black people scaring tourists away, and thinks wearing baggy pants makes you liable to be killed in the street. He supports causes that allow minorities to be judged when he’s a double minority in this country himself, and once advocated against those causes before he reached CNN’s airwaves.

        Yeah, fuck Dom Lemon.

      • tgtaggie

        Too bad he ain’t checking for you. lol. I believe he would be more interested in your man Serge.

        • LadyIbaka

          I wasn’t checking for him either to begin with. My love is with no strings attached.

      • Shy Glizzy’s Twin

        The fact that you love Don Lemon is quite evident by your use of the word “blondie”. You already on the list Stacey….we see you boo. It’s ok.

        • Diva

          Lol. You ain’t right!

        • LadyIbaka

          abeg, commot for road.

    • idkandidc

      FUCK DON LEMON.

  • iamnotakata

    “1. Yung Berg
    Has absolutely no redeeming qualities. None. Not one. Makes shitty music only people fed syrup-laced Similac appreciate. Somehow manages to look like a salamander and a sloth at the same time. Has the most punchable face and countenance in the history of punchable faces and countenances. To call him a piece of shit would be an insult to shit. Shit would be offended and would start a petition demanding”
    All of this. …and hey I like lolo, I knew her before twitter lol

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