The Best Part Of The Comey Hearing Is Watching These White Men Throw Bags Of Piss At Each Other » VSB

Featured, Race & Politics

The Best Part Of The Comey Hearing Is Watching These White Men Throw Bags Of Piss At Each Other

Chip Somodevilla/Getty Images

 

Look, I don’t know what’s going to be the result of all of this. Does the Darth Cheeto get impeached or, at the very least, decheetoed? I don’t know! Does Jeff The Baby-Faced Bigot Sessions resign? Who knows! Do the Cavs sign James Comey tonight to give them some last-minute rim protection? I have no fucking clue! Does Jared Kushner eat Snickers bars with a knife and fork? Probably! Is Reince Priebus still alive? I guess! Are we, like, officially Russians or something now? Maybe!

All I do know is that there are few things more entertaining than watching these bags of lukewarm piss hurl bags of lukewarm piss at each other. There are so many levels of Capital Letter Whiteness happening and being exposed here that it’s practically a Capital Letter Whiteness stroganoff!  A potpourri of power and privilege run amok! A heap of Capital Letter Whiteness hash served on a grit cake casserole!

I’m hungry now!

Damon Young

Damon Young is the editor-in-chief of VSB. He is also a columnist for GQ.com And he's working on a book of essays to be published by Ecco (HarperCollins). Damon is busy. He lives in Pittsburgh, and he really likes pancakes. Reach him at damon@verysmartbrothas.com. Or don't. Whatever.

  • Morgan L. McDaniel

    I bet that grit casserole is a dessert at Wypipo’s cookouts. Sweetened with oppression and cane sugar.

  • AzucarNegra

    So did Trump write his lawyer’s letter or nah?
    https://www.vox.com/2017/6/8/15763816/kasowitz-letter-typos-predisent

    • Diego Duarte

      As a lawyer allow me to tell you there’s no feasible way or form any lawyer, especially one available to the president of the USA, would EVER write such a letter riddled with spelling and grammatical errors.

      Law firms double check, triple check, then print out and check sh*t over twice again, before sending anything to the client. Let lightning strike me dead if that letter was written by anyone other than Trump acting in a fucking hurry.

      • AzucarNegra

        I thought about his doctor’s note when I saw that story.

        • Diego Duarte

          Let me also add that Law Firms use special paper, bearing nice seals and sh*t, in order to issue statements of such nature and gravity. No way José this wasn’t Trump.

          • AzucarNegra

            Or Beavis or Budhead

      • Janelle Doe

        So Spicy wrote it?

    • Alessandro De Medici

      I thought the argument made by the lawyer was pretty weak and irresponsible. Not surprised at all.

    • cedriclathan

      What is the word for, “beyond stupid?”

  • BlackMamba, Romperstiltskin

    Hi everyone, what should I order for dinner?

    • AzucarNegra

      Wind pie and nothing chops

      • BlackMamba, Romperstiltskin

        Wow. That’s no fun. Lol.

        • AzucarNegra

          Go and cook something.

          • BlackMamba, Romperstiltskin

            Girl bye.

            • AzucarNegra

              Hahaha. I tried. Shrugs

    • Val

      A pizza pie!

  • Wowza23

    Hmmm. Ice Cube is going to be on ‘Real Time’. I really hope he calls on the spirit of Doughboy to address this.

    https://www.usatoday.com/story/life/tv/2017/06/08/ice-cube-will-address-bill-maher-racial-slur-on-real-tiime-friday/102626102/

  • QRaven

    I’m really enjoying this dude on Wheel of Fortune from Compton. He named several of his kids after him, including the girls. His name is Curt.

    • AzucarNegra

      Another’ George’ situation?

      • QRaven

        Hm, I don’t know lol

  • AzucarNegra

    http://thehill.com/homenews/senate/337024-cruz-shrugs-after-getting-his-mic-cut-off-mid-speech
    Poor Ted, he needs to just pack his bags and go home. Don’t even say good bye just leave

    • QRaven

      Dang, that was harsh lol

      • AzucarNegra

        Even Christians are saying ” you should have pulled out”

        • Janelle Doe

          Bloop!

  • AKA The Sauce

    Can someone tell me what John McCain was smoking? His questioning was beyond foolish. How to you get mad at Clinton when she was the one targeted? Why would she be investigated when she was the target? And how do you get mad that Clinton’s investigation is closed and Trumps is open? Republican leadership REALLY needs to stop insulting my intelligence.

    • AzucarNegra

      But her emails and Benghazi worked wonderfully in the past, so why not use what was tried and tested?

    • Val

      Sauce!

    • I have to go back and see this clusterc*k for what it was

      • AKA The Sauce

        Save your brain-cells

  • blueevey

    We need riots and anarchy. Doing things properly will take too dam long and it isn’t guaranteed to work.

    • Brooklyn_Bruin

      A coup ain’t just a two door car.

    • Tried that in the 60s. The other side had more guns then. And today the police are far more militarized than back in the day. The only way forward to is to (1) get more citizens to vote and (2) attempt to convince more people in swing states to see the light.

  • donalda

    These hearings are entertaining as f* no lie. But if the Dems do sweep the house in 2018 and don’t hold these GOP knuckleheads to account, man, I don’t even know.

    • nillalatte

      I’ve been waiting for the government to hold Bush, Cheney, & Rumsfeld accountable for their war crimes. Still waiting while Malaysia found them guilty in abstinentia. Sad state of affairs this thing called America.

    • Brooklyn_Bruin

      Don’t let bygones be bygones. Settle up them accounts. If the Democrats ever get power again, FDR x LBJ x Obama the entire government

  • NonyaB?

    “James Comey tonight to give them some last-minute rim protection”

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/5984d30ffad251d710d3ca757b2c96a54db76d9eaf3329ffe06aa03b926484be.gif

    • Janelle Doe

      Lol

More Like This