***disclaimer: before beginning, i want to remind everyone that “overrated” doesn’t mean “bad”, “worthless”, or even “average”, just not as valuable/noteworthy/important as common sentiment would suggest.***
you know, i’m not even going to talk about the taste (which makes me think of how brewed and malted cow urine must taste) or the fact that the smell reminds me of women who sound like doc rivers. no, what makes beer so overrated is the ad campaign revolving around it being the ultimate party starter, when in reality there are myriad things (rum, vodka, midgets, white women, crackheads, ovulation, etc) much more efficient
i mentioned this already earlier in the week, but when you consider the lengths we go through to get them, the potential downside of having them (unwanted emotional attachments and children, disease, etc), and the relatively short time they last (five to approximately thirty-five seconds) you can’t help but think that orgasms are the tupac of life: short-lived, volatile, and much better in theory and memory than reality
3. the 70′s
even those who weren’t alive during this era regard it in a lovingly nostalgic manner, (rightfully) lauding the music, the movements, and the time of free love. but, maybe, just maybe if our parents didnt spend so much time f*cking, burning shit down, and snorting mushrooms off the backs of white camels in reno with rick james, maybe the 80′s, 90′s, and 2000′s wouldn’t have been so royally f*cked up.
4. new york city
***taken from “biting the apple“***
between the cost of living, the traffic, the chinese, the tendency for disasters to occur, the crime, the dipset, being governed by a blind jiggalo, and the fact that its more densely populated than jakarta, if i want diversity, good food, great entertainment, bad sports, and tons of different dialectics and dna, i’ll just move in with frankie and neffe
5. black american inventions
look, while we all know that cats were using ipads on spaceships in zimbabwe before europeans even figured out that infants aren’t meant to be edible, the whole black american invention game leaves much to be desired. while we’ve definitely been great innovators, pioneers, and iconoclasts, when the the doorstop is listed as one of your 50 greatest new contributions in a 400 year legacy, maybe its time to re-think those commemorative stamp plans
6. (tie) any rap music made before 1992 and any professional sport played before 1980
to anyone still actively promoting the “best ever“ merit of babe ruth, public enemy, the 70′s steelers, whodini, wilt chamberlain, bob cousy, rakim, joe louis, arnold palmer, run dmc, bdp and etc:
“i don’t believe you, you need more people”
btw, by “i dont believe you, you need more people” i mean “you’re a f*cking idiot“
quite possibly the most overrated thing on this list, as approximately 95 percent of the worlds population (including me) follow a belief system explicitly stating that their death will be legions better than their life ever was, but only maybe 10% of that 95% are actually looking forward to it.
basically, we’re all full of shit
i’m still not completely sure how a country whose only contribution to the rest of the world is best served with cranberry juice managed to be a superpower worthy of fear, respect, and apollo creed’s life
because cats and cat people always have and will always be better
10. being underrated
seriously, who the hell came up with the idea that being the person who didn’t get the credit that they were due was a good thing? i mean, if you asked one million random kids what they wanted to be when they grew up, i’d bet “overlooked, and generally undervalued” would be even further down the list than “big ben’s next rape victim“, but somehow we adults have treated this like it was something to be proud of. no wonder everything’s all f*cked up now.
i’m sure i’m missing a few. any additions?