So I received this email from Wise Diva the other day with a few web-links in it and lo and behold I came across an article that I swear I’d write. Hell, it almost feels like its the article The Champ and I have been writing all along…
Sometimes folks just get it right.
CO-ED Magazine’s staff wrote an article entitled: 13 Facts About Women…Men Forget
Oh happy happy joy joy mothertruckers. Now, I know that we’ve written a blog before where we mentioned things that we wish the opposite sex realized so it just stands to reason that this article would be right along those lines of things that we support here at VSB.com. So I figured I’d share a few points that I think are particularly poignant, people. Ponder pontificatiously….
A Better Liar: When a man lies, he knows he’s doing something wrong. He’ll dart his eyes, mumble, change the subject and try to just get the hell out of the situation as fast as possible. When a woman lies, she can look the person she loves square in the eye and feed him the biggest load of bullsh*t ever, and make it seem like she’s being perfectly reasonable–more reasonable than usual! (That’s your first clue.) But pity the man who catches his woman in a lie; call her out on it, and she will drop her entire arsenal of your f**k-ups upon your quickly withering form. Forget that tactic; it’s better to just go get drunk and hit on other chicks out of spite.
Constantly Looks For Inner-Meaning: For men, saying exactly what you mean stands as a matter of pride. But no matter how straight your talk, women like to feel like they have more control over the situation by attempting to decode what you’re not saying, so they can guess how you’re feeling and what to do next. Here’s the thing, ladies: Men only talk to accomplish a goal of some type, like working out a business plan. You talk just to talk. It makes you feel better just to get everything out there. If talking isn’t for any reason other than to talk, he’d rather do anything else.
Ouch. But ouch so good.
And who could forget:
Crazy: We know this is cliche, but let’s get something straight: When chemical imbalances (i.e., changes in hormone levels) control your thoughts, words and actions–that’s called crazy. A “visit from aunt flow,” as they say, is enough to throw many women over the edge–at least for a couple of days. And while we will forever hold hope that there’s a reliably sane one amongst them, we are yet to even hear of her existence. In fact, most women admit their (temporary) insanity; you’d know if you listen to them. Don’t, and that’s some sh*t they’ll use against you, if you make the mistake of not knowing what the hell is going on.
And hey…if it’s on the internet, it must be true, right? Right????
And one for the road:
P.S. Women: Don’t believe anything Cosmo or any other “female-targeted publication” tells you about what guys like. Just keep it as close to BJs and BBQ as possible and you’re in the green.
Well I think they got it right…what say you?
-VSB P aka THE ARSONIST
