Maybe Eric Benet Wasn’t Making It Up

Vindication, b*tch. YOUNG MULA BABY!

You remember when we all found out that Halle Berry and Eric Benet were divorcing because he was a “sex addict”?

If you’re like most people, you called bull malarkey, tagged her as crazy since, really, who cheats on Halle Berry then claims to be a sex addict JUST to find a reason to break up unless there are some deeper issues he’s trying to run from. Well, you know, aside from Eric Benet.

*rimshot*

Well maybe Barefoot Jones really did have a problem. And maybe it’s in his genes. Not his jeans as that would be majorly en fuego.

(By the way, I’m totally aware that being a sex addict can be a real problem. However, cheating on your spouse because you’re a sex addict seems like a copout. Thank you and good night.)

According to a study done by researchers at SUNY-Binghamton, there might actually be a certain genetic disposition to infidelity and one-night stands, EVEN  if you’re in a committed and loving relationship. Go figure.

“What we found was that individuals with a certain variant of the DRD4 gene were more likely to have a history of uncommitted sex, including one-night stands and acts of infidelity,” said Garcia. “The motivation seems to stem from a system of pleasure and reward, which is where the release of dopamine comes in. In cases of uncommitted sex, the risks are high, the rewards substantial and the motivation variable – all elements that ensure a dopamine ‘rush.’”

According to Garcia, these results provide some of the first biological evidence that at first glance, seems to be somewhat of a contradiction: that individuals could be looking for a serious committed long-term relationship, but have a history of one-night stands. At the same time, the data also suggests it is also reasonable that someone could be wildly in love with their partner, commit infidelity, and yet still be deeply attached and care for their partner. It all came back to a DRD4 variation in these individuals. Individual differences in the internal drive for a dopamine ‘rush’ can function independently from the drive for commitment.

Again, go figure. Let me address something here – and to be clear, I’m not saying it’s RIGHT –  but I’ve always thought that it was possible to cheat on somebody, strictly for the physical release of it, and remain emotionally invested in somebody else. The decision to cheat, while driven by an emotionally impulsive thought process, is still a decision that could be avoided. Loving somebody is completely emotional. Now, I understand how folks would contend that if you really loved somebody you wouldn’t be compelled to cheat. Fair enough.

I’m just saying. It’s possible. And no I do not know from personal experience.

And now we have science to back it up. But to be fair, our friends at SUNY-Binghamton make sure to note that just because this gene may exist in your spouse doesn’t mean that they will cheat.

“The study doesn’t let transgressors off the hook,” said Garcia. “These relationships are associative, which means that not everyone with this genotype will have one-night stands or commit infidelity. Indeed, many people without this genotype still have one-night stands and commit infidelity. The study merely suggests that a much higher proportion of those with this genetic type are likely to engage in these behaviors.”

Makes sense.

Now keep in mind, I’m not going to make excuses for anybody that cheats.

Don’t cheat. Baaaaad cheater! *wagging finger*

And I definitely wouldn’t advise ANYBODY who thinks that they MIGHT have some genetic trait that predisposes them to cheating to really come home and say, “I really couldn’t help it, it’s just who I am.” This study doesn’t even state that these people are guaranteed to do it, just that they might have a higher pleasure-reward center than others. I’m not sure this is really breaking any new ground either.

But man, what if Eric Benet had used some science during his divorce proceedings to state that he didn’t cheat on Halle on purpose, he got it from his daddy?

At this point, very little is known about how genetics and neurobiology influence one’s sexuality propensities and tendencies but Garcia is hopeful that this study will add to the growing base of knowledge – in particular, how genes might predispose individuals to pursue sensation seeking across all sorts of domains – from substance use to sexuality. This study also provides further support for the notion that the biological foundations for sexual desire may often operate independently from, although absolutely linked to, deep feelings of romantic attachment.

Thoughts? Any of this surprising? Would this ever be a legit reason to you? Even if your guy or gal had science to prove they had a higher propensity to cheat, or rather engage in infidelitous activity because they “couldn’t help it”? I know the answer is a resounding no, but I had to ask. Does anybody believe this mess?

Bad science. Sit Ubu sit.

Good dog.

-VSB P aka THE ARSONIST aka 21 KOOKAROO GANGSTA aka ANYBODY SEEN CHAMP? aka GIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIRL HE A 3

***EDIT: If you are thinking of coming out to Tabaq tonight, could you shoot Panama an email at contact@verysmartbrothas.com? Trying to get an idea how many folks to look out for and to make sure that we do catch up with everybody unlike the Park debacle.***

P.S. If you’re in the DMV and looking for something to do this evening from 8-12, head on out to Tabaq (1336 U Street, NW) and hang with Panama Jackson for the viewing party for BET/Centric’s Master of the Mix Viewing Party hosted by Lil SoSo Productions and sponsored by Smirnoff. Smirnoff Open bar from 9-10pm. Peep the flyer below and come check the rhyme. For those on Twitter, @ reply me to let me know you’re there @panamajackson. Holla.

Also for the DMV Hip-Hop and New Jack Swing afficionados, this Saturday, December 11, at Liv Nightclub (2001 11th Street, NW), EPMD will be performing live. Real hip-hop dog. Word up. Get tickets here.  And for all the old school R&B, new jack swing cats, B.B. (MOTHERF*CKING)D. will be performing at Liv on Sunday, December 19th. Doors open at 6pm. You KNOW you don’t want to miss this. Get tickets here. It’s BBD, you know good and damn well you can’t afford to miss this show. Get right, or get left. Shine On Me Productions like a big dog.

halle berry’s break-up, found in translation

“i got next, right?”

(from people.com)

Although Gabriel Aubry and Halle Berry have split up, the model says he has nothing but love and respect for the actress, with whom he has a 2-year-old daughter.

translation: “sh*t. what the hell do you expect him to say? he’s a freakin canadian underwear model who bagged, boned, knocked up, and bounced on the baddest chick on the planet, and i’m a recently divorced 47 year old journalist writing anonymous copy for people.com just so i can fund my p*rn addiction and pay child support checks. FML and f*ck him. he’s lucky i don’t pee on this report instead of actually publishing it”

“While I will not comment on all of the wild inaccuracies being speculated about in the media, I am sad to say that Halle and I have decided together to separate at this time,” Aubry, a model, confirmed Friday in a statement to Access Hollywood released through his agency, Wilhelmina Models.

translation: “while i will not comment on all of the wild inaccuracies being speculated about in the media, i will say that i was initially sad that halle and i broke up. however, this sadness quicky subsided once i remembered that i’m rich, white, in my prime, and not only do i already have canadian and european women on lock, bagging halle has allowed me to in climb into 3rd place on the black american woman “white guys who can definitely get it” list, narrowly edging out steve nash and and falling right behind matthew mcconaughey and bobby deniro. basically, i’m saying “how do you like those apples, b*tch?” to God right now” Continue reading

35 reasons why he cheated

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although i’ve never personally cheated on a mate, i’ve been friends and acquaintances with so many habitual cheaters that i consider myself to be a cheating maven.

i’ve been every alibi (“yeah kim, he was with me last wednesday night. he let me borrow his blender, and since he was there we watched the spurs game, did some blow, and fell asleep on my couch“), heard every story, and have had every possible guilty rationale volunteered to me (“i know i be doing my girl dirty, dog, but i’m anemic so i can’t help it.“)

basically, i’ve heard every single logical reason why a man might have cheated. some are mind-numbingly simple and concise while others are much more nuanced and layered than you would ever imagine

today, as another example of our commitment to fighting crime, i’m going to share all 35 of them. Continue reading

the best ever

***this monday, as a service from the kind gentleman of verysmartbrothas.com, the champ has decided to rank the three best romantic comedies of all-time the last 20 years. enjoy***

3. chasing amy

premise: a comic-book writer (ben affleck) befriends and falls in love with a fellow comic book writer (joey lauren adams)…who happens to be a lesbian. hilarity, pain, tremendous cussing, and unfortunate ho-yay behavior ensue.

reasons for making the cut:

—easily the best movie kevin smith ever made. this isn’t even remotely debatable

—contained quite possibly the funniest token black character ever on screen, in dwight ewell’s “hooper x”, a fellow comic book writer, who also happens to be extremely violent, extremely militant, and extremely gay. omar would have been proud

—introduced “finger-cuffs” to my general lexicon, a term i still use with glee at least thrice daily

—perfectly captures a typical male’s queasy uneasiness when forced to confront his woman’s, ummmm, “eclectic” sexual past, and how hard it is for us to let that go.

—would have rated higher on this list if not for the ending, which is so inconceivably and shockingly bad that i refuse to even talk about it

2. boomerang

for black people those willing to put saccharin garbage such as “the best man” and “brown sugar” ahead of “boomerang” when ranking romantic comedies, consider the following…

—talent-wise, when you consider eddie murphy, martin lawrence, david alan grier, and john witherspoon this movie contained four (five if you count grace jones’s vagina) comedic legends in their absolute prime, as well as a before her prime halle berry, a still barely unattractive tisha campbell (before she made the leap to “completely unattractive”), lela rochon’s feet, and a surprisingly milfy eartha kitt. wow.

—the infamous thanksgiving dinner, where witherspoon’s “mr. jackson” introduced the world to the concept of “coordination” as well as “pop that pu–y!!!“, is easily one of the five funniest movie scenes of all-time

—was the best of the numerous roles robin givens seemed to land where she played herself evil, conniving, manipulative bitches

1. high fidelity

maybe this movie gets top billing solely because it’s the movie that inspired me to start making lists for everything. maybe it’s number one because i see so much of myself in john cusack’s rob gordon, and it perfectly illustrates that late 20′s “i guess i should settle down with her cause i guess at this age it’s the right thing to doi guess” angst…a phenomenon i’m currently experiencing i completely understand. maybe i just want to sleep with meet lisa bonet. who knows. i will say that, despite its basically all-white cast, it’s quite possibly the “blackest” relationship comedy ever made. think about it: a severely underemployed and apathetic guy, spending all of his free time with his equally underemployed and apathetic friends talking about music and reflecting on all of the women he’d been with in the past. this sentence describes me at least seven of my closest friends, and is why this movie is a required view for any guy between 21-35.

anyway though…you’ve read my list. even though my ranking is completely undebatable, i’m curious…how does it stack up with yours?

—the champ