The Moment When Love and Friendships Collide…

Panama’s latest at Guyspeak

I have a lady friend who seems to have become some sort of relationship savant as of late. I don’t know where or when it happened, but it seems like almost daily, she’s dropping some profound thought she’s having about her past relationships and pursuits in dealing with men. The girl is dropping gems. So brings us to her most recent moment of clarity. 

A little back story, a few weeks ago she engaged in a debate with her friends about the age old tale that men and women cannot be friends. She used our relationship as an example that platonic relationships are possible and her friends posited that it only remains that way because we don’t live in the same city.

Read the rest here.

These Are The Types of Questions I Get On Guyspeak: A Sampler

And why you should visit Guyspeak daily because of the level of f*ckery of some of the questions, and we still attempt to help the people out…

Allons-y.

Q: What does it say about a man who prefers cunnilingus over coitus?

A: Good question. It may say a whole lot…or nothing at all.

People have their preferences. I know some guys who get absolutely nothing out of fellatio. They don’t even want it. That seems odd to some people. It just comes down to what pleases different people. Perhaps the man who likes taking a nosedive down under is just all about pleasuring the woman he’s with. So much so that he just wants to stay down there, which I imagine for a woman would get old after a while. (click link to read the rest)

Q: I don’t think my guy is freaky enough for me. I don’t know what to say to him. I try different things but he always reverts back to same old. boring. whats up with that? :/

A: I think that people significantly underestimate how important sexual compatibility is to the life of a relationship. Liking the same type of tea and shows on FOX News is helpful, but at the end of the day, chemistry and sexual compatibility trump all of that. If you both love the same things but are extreme opposites, you either get fireworks or nothing. (click link to read the rest)

Q: Am I wrong for not wanting my Boyfriend to get on social network? I honestly think That’s a gateway for ppl to flirt,cheat etc…

A: You might not be wrong, per se, but definitely being unfair and projecting your own issues onto your boyfriend.

Walking outside is a gateway for people to flirt and/or cheat. You can’t protect yourself by trying to control your boyfriend’s access to people. It’s not only unfair, its a ridiculous request. Plus, I wish my girl WOULD attempt to tell me what I can and cannot do. If the whole world is using some form of social networking, I’m supposed to be the person who isn’t because my girlfriend (who probably is) is concerned that I will cheat on her?

So let’s be real and call it for what it is, you have some trust issues and think that if you stop him from going where everybody else is, he won’t cheat on you, in any way. Except you have to trust him first. And if you don’t, no amount of feigned control will ever stop that.

Head on over to Guyspeak to see what’s happening in the world of the conflicted! And if you haven’t, sign up for the VSB P Guyspeak Newsletter to get a combination of my answers and posts on Guyspeak for the week.

-VSB P

 

I’m Pretty Sure Justin Timberlake Can Save Love

Panama’s latest at Guyspeak -

A few days ago, Twitter blew up with the word that iTunes was streaming the new Justin Timberlake (JT) album, The 20/20 Experience, an album nobody knew he was making until he dropped “Suit & Tie” on radio, days before the release of the album. So like anybody else with a computer and ears, I traipsed right on over to iTunes to listen to his album.

I’m half surprised that the iTunes Store didn’t implode under the weight of a gazillion folks wanting to listen to it since, well, JT moves the needle. We have very few artists like him that can appeal to pretty much any audience he wants to by virtue of his mere existence. He sings well. He acts well and he has pulled nearly every hot chick du jour, settling on one of THE hottest in Jessica Biel. Aye caramba.

He makes urban pop music that can play on any format radio staiton. Except probably country, but if Taylor Swift still counts, then I don’t see why JT doesn’t.

Zing.

Read more at Guyspeak.

What In The Entire Hell? National Proposal Day?

Us menfolks tend to do a lot of complaining about Valentine’s Day. For a lot of us, its a made up day that causes us to have to go drop a ton of money on flowers and candy and restaurants where we’d not normally eat. But the truth is, we don’t mind it as much as we let on.

Hell, the only real beef most of us have with it is that it falls in February, less than 2 months from Christmas where most of us spent all of our money. We don’t mind showering our significant others with love and affection…we just don’t want to be forced into it. I think that makes us human.

Read more at Guyspeak.com

It Turns Out Safe Sex Is Just As Enjoyable As Unsafe Sex!

I love that there’s an article or study done for nearly everything under the sun. You might have to search long and hard, but I’d bet all the money in Prince Harry’s pocket that if you wanted to know the average size of the middle toe on Botswana fisherman who only work on Tuesdays in July, there’s some study out there for it. Granted, that’s pretty obscure.

Well, along the lines of studies that focus on things people ACTUALLY want to know, a professor at the University of Indiana-Bloomington, determined what might possibly be the most “duh” statement on the planet: men and women enjoy sex just as much with condoms as they do without condoms.

The jury’s out on the study that asks about how it feels, which is where most of the debate actually happens.

Researchers reviewing an online questionnaire of the sex habits of men and women from 18-59, found participants consistently rated safe sex as ‘highly arousing and pleasurable’ – the same score as unprotected sex.

Dr Debby Herbenick, from the School of Public Health-Bloomington, Indiana University, who led the study said: ‘This may be because men are more likely than women to purchase condoms and to apply condoms.

‘However, it’s important for more women to become familiar with the condoms they use with their partner so that they can make choices that enhance the safety and pleasure of their sexual experiences.’

While this should be both promising and exciting information to those who work in the latex and condom industry as well as safe sex advocates, I seriously doubt a study like this is going to make anybody go out and grab a jimmy that wasn’t already going to use one.

Here’s why, we already know that sex can be just as enjoyable with a condom as it can be without one. Without can feel better, however, I’m sure all of us have used some condoms that were so thin that we questioned whether or not the condom had come off (sometimes it had, sometimes it was there doing its duty). I remember when the Durex Sheikh condoms dropped, those things scared the bejesus out of me because they never felt like they were on. Whereas Lifestyle condoms on the other hand well, let’s just say their motto should have been Lifestyles “Just say yes to pregnancy!”. Not a fan. Trojans have been consistently at the top of the game forever and they have some ultra thin ultra sensitive brands that give you that “raw” feeling as well.

There’s no substitute for peace-of-mind. And those individuals who need that are always going to use condoms. Then there’s the contingent who has already eschewed condoms in their relationships and shot of sexing some new thing for the first time, they’re not going back to condoms either. This study is great fodder but it’s also common sense and won’t tilt the tide in one way or another.

But I’m glat it exists for the younger kids to be used in sex education so that you can convince them that it will feel just as good and be safer. So maybe that could be one positive, if it helps keep a jimi hat on the wang of some petulantly curious 16-year-old then maybe its all worth it.

Then again, you don’t even need a study for that.

Read more at Guyspeak.com