Wasted

I’ve learned a few lessons in life. For instance, I’ve learned that if you stick your tongue on some ice, it might get stuck there until somebody comes and pours hot water on your face. I’ve learned that Obama cannot save America from itself. I’ve most recently learned that two MC’s can’t occupy the same space at the same time; it’s against the laws of physics.

Here’s another oldie, but a goodie: After a certain age, men cannot just be nice to women.

It’s true. Oh yeah, it’s true.

That might seem like an odd lesson to learn and it doesn’t mean that if you’re a man you should just slap the monkey shine sh*t out of the next woman you meet, but it does mean that as a man, you have to be really careful with who you flirt with and how long you do so since it can easily be assumed that you are talking to such a woman out of genuine interest and if no numbers or information are exchanged at any point, well…

…you’ve just wasted that woman’s time.

While I disagree with this on principle (hell, she just got a chance to talk to me, no strings attached and I didn’t walk away, lucky her), I do understand the frustrations that many women could feel if they spend say, 30 minutes, jawjacking (no BJ) with some bloke about life only to find out that dude either has a girlfriend or is pretty much not interested in pursuing anything further with a woman.

I’ve had this problem. I’m a social butterfly of epic proportions. I will talk you up and down and forty-seven ways from Sunday and then say, “well, it was nice talking to you, but its time to keep it moving, pimpin’, you don’t know me!” And more than a few times I’m fairly convinced that the woman on the opposing end of my stellar and charming ways was either confused, dumbfounded, or dumbfoundedly confused that the interaction would end with no closure. Except, I got my closure. I got to a place where the convo didn’t interest me anymore and then, well, sayonara.

Thing is, you just can’t do that to women over age 27.  Fact is, women are looking for men to date and be monogamous with and all that buttery flowery stuff. And most guys do indeed suck (no Adam Lambert). So when they come across a man who they can talk to for a significant amount of and time and not want to kill, its a breath of fresh air. Who doesn’t want to keep breathing? Women are often looking for love connections. So if you spend 45 minutes talking to a woman you have no interest in pursuing outside of the short convo, knowing what MOST are looking for, it’s almost as if you’re wasting the time they could have been using on some other guy who might actually WANT to hit.

Except, clearly, with so few men out there, technically, that time NOT spent talking to a dude would be spent talking to her homegirl and not a chap with two hangin’ and one swangin’. So there’s no real opportunity cost here. But, the chick’s time is still wasted.

GUCCI!

And that’s not very nice to be out here wasting women’s time when there’s already a man shortage and then there’s a short man problem and a tall man with a short leg problem so I suppose it makes sense. And then there’s the whole no platonic friends rules.

Anyway, good people of the VSB, is it rude for a man to talk to a woman without any intention of getting her number? I don’t think so but I’ve been debated, disputed, hated and viewed in America as a tease since I’ve left a woman hanging or two.

Am I wrong?

Or am I alright like Janet Jackson?

Is women’s time being wasted?

-VSB P aka THE ARSONIST aka TANGLE JIG P aka GIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIRL, HE A 3

Happy Thanksgiving!

To all those good people of VSB who venture here daily and comment to their hearts content, we humbly say thank you.  And we’re not just saying it either, if we could hug you all, we’d do it.  But since we can’t, you’ll just have to settle for these kind hearted words and sentiments.

With that said, I figured that today would be a perfect day to just, go down the list of things I’m greatful for.  With so much drama in the LBC bad stuff in the world, sometimes you have to just take a step back and realize all of the greatness that is out there.  And no Panama is not going all soft on you.  Heaven’s no.  I just robbed two old ladies with a slingshot and the threat of bootleg Polident, so my gangsta card is intact.

But it is Thanksgiving, the Redskins are still Indians, Liz is still protesting, and Black folks still have the itis.

So, without further ado, here are things I’m thankful for:

  • good health – with all the H1N1, STDs, and bad breath going around, I’m amazed I’m still standing, but you ain’t really freshazimiz (yay, our first Bow Wow quote)
  • my daughter’s good health – can’t say enough about this one.  That’s my heart. Plus she’s got teeth now and if she senses foolywang, she tries to bite me.
  • Plies, Gucci Mane, Bangs, etc – for providing me with hours of endless entertainment
  • The ability to read – with unemployment looking like it is right now, I’m so glad I can read the tea leaves
  • Reasonable (-ish) gas prices – I’m still driving a damn monster of a vehicle and it still drinks gas like hoes drink…well, you know…
  • Liz’s patience
  • The Champ’s ability to so defly use the shift+ key for capitalization.  He’s a tru-master at that.
  • Indoor plumbing – after hearing the tales of the toilets that were basically just holes in the ground, I’ve got a new found appreciate for the toilets in my home.  Just yesterday I dapped my toilet up and said, “good job dawg”
  • Adam Lambert’s AMA performance – if only because it’s finally good to see a white dude get in some trouble for some stuff he does on screen, even though I totally think he’s getting shafted by the networks (um, no pun intended)
  • Jay-Z’s ability to not respond to Beanie Sigel’s ridiculous barbs at him – seriously, Beanie?  Grow a pair and stop acting like a petulent child you petulant f*ck.
  • Speaking of Jay, Beyonce’s inability to know when to call it quits – seriously she needs to take some time off, but then who would women hate on?  Rihanna?? She’s still recovering from the gloom hand of the decade.
  • My girl – because she puts up with a lot.
  • Barack Obama’s first year in office – mostly because I never thought I’d say those words and the name attached was colored.  Still can’t do the Chia Obama thing though.  I’ve t-shirts, that should be enough.
  • VSB – because without this site, who would I be?  Aside from being this uber-sexxy trey-piece with an opinion and no forum?  Besides, I’m working on editing the end of Malcolm X so that all the kids say, “i am VSB”.  It’s not going so well, but I’m working on it, and I’m thankful that I have a job.
  • Running this blog sh*t – sorry, the cocksman came out of me on that one.  But I mean, you know how we do it.

Well those are just a few things I’m thankful for this Thanksgiving.  What are you all thankful for?  And don’t be shy?

Tell Uncle P all about it.

The floor is yours.

-VSB P aka THE ARSONIST aka TANGLE JIG P aka GIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIRL, HE A 3

*Admin Note: We are taking the rest of the week off here at VSB HQ.  Enjoy your Thanksgiving and see you next week!  Also, check out guyspeak.com, where every Wednesday I post a new blog about something Girls’ BFFy.  Also, I answer folks questions every day and boy do folks ask some strange questions.  So get thee to Guyspeak.com!*

Questions For The People, By The People

question-markOn Friday, I possibly did one of the stupidest things I may have ever done in my life.  I watched a 2:31 video clip of a photoshoot interview with Shawty Lo, Gucci Mane, and OJ Da Juiceman (watch at your own risk).

It was the most painful video I’ve ever watched in my entire life.  OJ Da Juiceman?  Well, he didn’t say more than 10 words during the entire clip and I’m almost sure that 9 of them were “aye!”  I probably don’t need to explain to you how bad Gucci Mane and Shawty L-O were.  Hell, their names are Gucci Mane and Shawty Lo. Continue reading