Who’s Got the Voice??!?!?.

black choirI haven’t done a music post for real, for real in a second.  But what the hell, it’s Friday, I’m sexxy, and we don’t have anything else to do.

On Monday night, one of my girl’s friends was over at my house doing her hair and since we’re young and Black…

…Beyonce came up.  I’ve come to accept that there are two schools of thought when it comes to Beyonce.

1)  She cannot sing at all, she just dances hard, and has the personality of a head of lettuce.

2)  She is a great singer and dances her booty off, and has the personality of a head of lettuce.

Of course, my girls’ friend was in the Beyonce can’t sing camp and it launched a discussion about who actually can sing.  I won’t run down her entire list but she threw Mario in there (she said that Trey Songz cannot sing which I found odd since Trey Songz absolutely can sing and is also a better singer than Mario).

Anyway, I figured what better place to see people’s true colors than here at VSB where objectivity rules the day and biases don’t run rampant.

Ahem.

So today, I, Panama Dontavious Jackson, will illuminate your lives with a list of 10 folks whose voices need to be recognized.  Since I am music (and Malcolm X) this is my charge in life.  Follow me!!

1) Donny Hathaway

I swear, this is one of the few grown ass men who’s ever brought a tear to my eyes, with the other being my father after an asswhippin’. Donny had one of the most beautiful voices EVER. So clear, so beautiful. So fresh and so clean clean. In fact, Donny’s voice was so good, he didn’t feel like he deserved it anymore and jumped out of a window of a hotel in New York City in January of 1979.

2) Marvin Gaye

What can be said about Marvin Gaye except that a lot you negroes out there are here because of him. His voice was so sultry and silky that he could create an album that should have been entitled “F*ck You Anna” (real title: Here My Dear) and it still came out sounding like a gift from God. Marvin Gaye was dat nigga. That’s the only thing I can say about him.

3) Sam Cooke

“I was booooooooooooooooorn by the river…”

From “Cupid” to “Cha Cha Cha” Sam’s voice was just raw and uncut. He made the most kiddy songs sound like something you’d get you some “action” too. However, the song that still brings a slight tear to my eye is “A Change Gonna Come”. Good gracious that is a serious song. The man sang like he knew he was going to die.

Guess what?? He got shot in a hotel in Los Angeles messing with the wrong woman at the wrong time.

Guess he was somewhat of a psychic, huh???

4) David Ruffin (of The Temptations)

Neither drugs, nor hoes, nor crack cocaine, could keep David Ruffin from sharing with the world his gift of harmonious melody. However, those things did keep him from making tour dates and turned him into an a-hole. Or at least according to Otis, even though we KNOW wasn’t nobody coming to see Otis.

5) Teddy Pendergrass

From “Love TKO” to “Close The Door” to “Wake Up Everybody”, Teddy has one of the most distinct voices in music. The harsh grit mixed with the smooth lova man vibe brought many a woman to her knees. Sad too, because that’s how he ended up in a wheelchair. Word to the wise, if you must get head in your whip fellas…watch the road, mmkay???

6) Amel Larrieux

This woman’s voice gives me the chills. No really, if you listen to the song “Freedom” on the Panther soundtrack, she has like two lines and then scats towards the end; whoooooooooooooooowee I just get the heeby jeeby’s listening to her. Her voice is so beautiful and effortless I’m almost convinced she’s really an angel sent here to touch lives.

7) Lauryn Hill

Allow me to commit blasphemy for a second. I don’t think The Mis-education of Lauryn Hill is that great. Is it a good album…yes. But I’m not just goo goo for it. However, I cannot deny how beautiful her voice is. Lauryn pre-2002 was essentially the epitome of woman. Gorgeous, beautiful, lovely voice, smart, sarcastic, etc. And now she’s just nuts.

8) Luther Vandross

Ya know what…he doesn’t even need an explanation. Luther can best be summed up using a title of one of his songs…

“So Amazing”.

9) Beyonce

I don’t care what you say. The girl can just flat out sing. If you disagree, you are a hater and should light yourself on fire…in the desert.

10) Whitney Houston

Because before crack she was crack.

Now that list was in no particular order, but those are 10 folks who I think can/could pretty much outsing anybody.  But this begs the question, as far as singers go (and ones that most folks would recognize), but let’s settle it…

…who has the best voice of all time??  And who would make your top 10 singers list?

VSB, Panama would like to know.

-VSB P aka THE ARSONIST aka TANGLE JIG P aka GIIIIIIIIIIRL,  HE A 3

10 Songs All Black People Should Know.

What is Blackness?  Is it the way you drink your Kool-Aid?  Does it require you to drink Kool-Aid?  Nobody knows.

Now despite not knowing what it really means to be Black, if you are Black there are certain things that you should just damn know.  And being as we’re in the business of education here at VSB.com, and Black, we may as well hit you all of from time to time with things that you should know if you’re, well, Black.  You can call it a periodic checklist check-in.  We’ll just call you Bob.

Exactly.

10.  Donny Hathaway – This Christmas

Something about Donny’s version of this song just gets into your soul and makes you happy about Christmas – even if you can’t afford to buy any gifts and your mother has to be the actual Christmas tree.   This song has lasted since the 1970s as the national black indicator of the Holiday season.  No matter what age or what radio station, ghetto or the suburbs, This Christmas is a mainstay of Black America (and white America too – I heard this in Macy’s a couple of times, though I do live in D.C.)

9.  Prince – Purple Rain

When this movie came out in 1984 (holy Batcakes, 1984) there was no denying the impact of this movie and this soundtrack, possibly Prince’s crowning achievement. Whether gangsta or gentlemen, explicit or androgynous, everybody and their mother knew the words to Purple Rain and would sing it loudly…and continues to do so ’til this day.  Plus, it proved that a straight Black man could wear a onesie, which if you think about it, did SO much for the Black community.

8.  Micheal Jackson – Thriller

It was the biggest song off of one of the biggest albums EVER.  I’ve come to realize that folks are generally either Prince or Michael fans.  Not that people don’t like both, but folks usually favor one or the other.  And if you were a Mike fan, you got the jacket, the glove and learned all the dance moves.  Black kids across America were pretending to be a zombied Michael Jackson for Halloween, not realizing that Michael Jackson apparently thinks Halloween is everyday of the year and pretends to be a zombie himself.

7.  Marcia Griffiths – Electric Boogie

You want to know the Black folks with no rhythm?  Put the Electric slide song on at a party and watch the folks that can’t do it.  Guaranteed to be broken out at nearly every Black function within a 12-planet radius, no Black life is complete without knowledge of the song, or at least the dance and knowing when to break it out -  basically whenever you damn well feel like it as nobody will ever reject an opportunity to do The Electric Slide.  It’s in our DNA.

6.  Al Green – Love & Happiness

The kind of song you can throw on at any barbecue or Black occasion and the older of the audience will most certainly start singing, off-key as they wanna be, but because it’s Reverand Al, it’s okay.  Plus, he automatically makes everybody think of grits.  And what’s more Black than grits?

5.  Marvin Gaye – What’s Going On?

Poignant, deep, and speaking to the struggle during the Vietnam War of both Blacks and other minorities.  Black folks love social commentary in music and nobody did it better than Marvin with this song and ultimately this album.  Plus his daddy capped him, which is nothing short of ignant ninja sh*t.  Plus, if you ain’t familiar with this song, then you probably don’t know Marvin well which means you probably don’t know any other Black people.  Meet some.

4.  Sam Cooke – A Change Is Gonna Come

All Black people should know this song because all Black people should have seen Malcolm X.  Or should see it.  Seeing Malcolm X should be a requirement of Blackness.  I’m gonna see if I can get that Congressionally mandated.  And like Marvin, this song is also some activist Black struggle music and a response to Bob Dylan’s “Blowin’ In The Wind”.  And ALSO like Marvin, he got caught out there with some shady woman who ended up killing him behind some non-sense, which is ALSO some ignant ninja sh*t.

3.  Maze FEATURING Frankie Beverly - Before I Let Go

Is it me or was Maze featuring Frankie Beverly for a very long time.  They just never let him join up, huh?  This song is akin to the Black National Anthem guaranteed to be played at every Black function where food is present.  In fact, if you’re Black and you don’t know this song, you should seek help.  And therapy.  And Maze featuring Frankie Beverly.

2.  James Weldon Johnson/John Rosamond Johnson – Lift Every Voice And Sing

The ACTUAL Negro National Anthem.  I mean, just cuz.  And that means ALL THE VERSES PEOPLE.  Not just the first verse.

1.  Stevie Wonder – Happy Birthday

Stevie’s tribute to Dr. Martin Luther Tha Kang, Jr is quite possibly the most famous song in Black history, mostly cuz its sung at every Black birthday function, and if you listen closely, can be heard being sung on nearly a daily basis by Black people in major metropolitan cities.  Because it’s always somebody’s birthday.  Hoo-rah.

******

So, did I miss anything?