whenever we bring up a topic dealing with red flags, deal-breakers, and other undesirable relationship qualities, the utter disdain for clinginess is repeatedly brought up…easily the muse for at least 300 comments. seemingly on par with serial infidelity, anti-intellectuallism, and crackheadedness, the general public sentiment behind the idea of “a clingy person” apparently ranks somewhere between “star jones” and “david koresh” with pretty much every vsb regular. well, every vsb regular…except me.

now obviously, being with a clingon wouldn’t be my optimum choice. although i’m not a space nazi, i do appreciate some alone time for writing, metacognition, “pastor racing“, kool-aid procuring, and other leisurely independant activities. but, if i were forced to choose between polar opposites “clingy” and “cold“, “cold” would get dropped quicker than siohvaughn wade. personally, i’d much rather be bombarded with attention than be in a romantic relationship devoid of it.

again, i’m not saying that it can definitely be annoying, but i can live with it. there are worse qualities a person can have (ie: “thimbleheadedness” and “being puerto rican”).

the clingy conundrum has made me think of other personal attributes and behaviors that are common red flags and/or deal-breakers for many people…but really don’t bother me much at all. deal-breakers for most everyone else, but “ehhh…its cool. its no big deal” for me.

for the sake of the entry, and in honor of my favorite flavor of kool-aid (which noone else seems to like), lets call these wild cherry flags

nassatalls

although i’ll forever remain excitedly intrigued by the presence of a philly with a exquisite booty depth and a perfect ass-to-waist ratio, its not a prerequisite. in fact, my ex-fiancee was about nassatall as one can get. i’d even joke with her that she had an “extended back”.

again, though. let me make this very clear. i’m NOT saying that i’m not an assfan, lol. sh*t, if i could, i’d sleep on satin bed pillows in the mold of bria myles’s hindparts. i’m just saying that i could live happily without it.

a political conservative

…as long as she votes for obama nov. 4th, i could care less how she feels the other 364 days of the year, lol

a virgin

of course, if women were on sale at giant eagle, i wouldnt intentionally go shopping in the virgin aisle…but if one happened to fall into my shopping cart, i wouldn’t be headed back there a day later, reciept in hand, screaming at the store manager for selling me defective goods.  i’d definitely wait at least a week before doing that.

thats its for me right now.

friends, fans, serial fellators, funders, and followers of vsb.com, what are some of your wild cherry flags?

—the champ

***btw, just in case anyone was taking any bets, the over/under for the number of reading challenged people who will completely ignore the topic today and just list their own personal red flags is 19***