Closure and The Big Owe.

ballNloopClosure*By the way, in this post I’m using this logic:  She believes she deserves closure, so he owes it to her.  That’s why owe and deserve are used almost interchangeably.

Over the past couple of weeks, I’ve had a long running debate with a friend of mine about the way her relationship ended and the fact she, like many people before her – both men and women – didn’t receive any closure.  Essentially, she has no idea what happened.  All she knows is that it was all good just a week ago.

Dude used to be her homey.  Now he acts like he don’t even know she.

One of the biggest problems with most breakups that don’t end because of some sort of landmark event – think cheating, spitting on mom dukes, pulling a Kanye – is that one person is always going to end up with more questions than answers.

Why did we break up?  What really happened?  Why did you just stop calling?  Was it something I did?  Was it something you did? Continue reading

the do’s and dont’s of breaking up with someone you still actually like

breaking up

i’m all f*cked up, and it’s all hollywoods fault.

you see, being raised on a steady diet of sh*t like the war of the roses, waiting to exhale, and fatal attraction led me to believe that all romantic break-ups were brutal bloodfeuds, replete with vicious insults, violent threats, hateful feelings, torn rabbits, microwaved weave, and white women.

this faulty expectation left me ill-equipped and unprepared for real life, where the vast majority of adult break-ups occur while both parties still have generally positive feelings towards each other, a fact that occasionally turns this simple process into a prolonged lesson in passive-aggressive bitchassedness.

Continue reading