They say truth is stranger than fiction. Here’s the problem, I don’t know who the f*ck “they” are, but they sure are right. They are wise beyond belief.
I am they and they are me. We are the world.
I hope the kid is yours. Maury.
Now that you’re thoroughly confused, let’s get to the point. There are some truths out there that men and women need to accept. Unfortunately some of these truths are stereotypical and induce anger, but facts are facts. Let’s talk about some. Mmkay?
By the way, Dan Gilbert needs to be paddled with wood of sycamore and titans. And Cleveland….GET OVER IT.
1) Every man checks out white women. Period.
I work in the land of young supple white women. While they don’t particularly move me to action (plus I’m too light for white chicks) I do notice attractive ones when I see them. So does every other man of ever other ethnicity. Imperialism is a motherf*cker. I saw this car of four Mexicans (no Gem) just today and as this one white chick crossed the street they were all STUNNED at her. That’s when I realized, white women are universal. No matter where you go, folks are checking out white women. Sad, but true. And by white women, I mean steretoypical ones, like Becky, not the ones at go-gos or look like they only like Black meat. And they’re easily noticeable.
2) Men only deal in emotions to get p*ssy.
Men don’t like talking about emotions. But we know that if we do, you all will give it up. You can’t hit a chick off (with esteem usually) unless you make it clear that there are SOME feelings or emotions tied into her. If we could avoid those altogether, we would. It’s the reason that sensitive thugs are hated by men everywhere. Emotional men make emotional decisions and people end up dead. Business killing is way more efficient. But nope, because we get caught up in the curves, we go spreading emotions.
Sidenote: I’m not saying the emotions aren’t honest, but our ability to tap into them is directly driven by our desire to not experience desert d*ck.
3) Women cannot have sex without getting emotionally involved.
It’s not that women are liars, I think its just that they are mistaken. Most women will tell you that they can’t bone sans getting emotionally attached. That makes sense. Don’t believe that Boomerang Robin Givens mess. Sure there are women out there with very few emotions and operate like men. These women are not to be f*cked with because what if they do get caught up? They start acting like emotional men and somebody gets killed. That’s no bueno. Not that I’m completely against murder, I’m just saying murder the right people, dig? The point here is don’t believe them if they say they can.
4) If more men and women would just shut the f*ck up and, well, f*ck, the world would be a happier place.
Men lie, women lie, numbers don’t lie. Yeah, Jay-Z ain’t as smart as he’d like us to be. That has no point here, I just felt like saying that. Fact is, men and women speak two totally different languages 95 percent of the time so we argue. If we’d just shut up and bone for like 15 minutes and get back to the argument afterwards, we’d realize that the argument was pointless. In fact, that’s my new advocation. Before the argument gets bad, bone, then discuss. Wash, rinse, repeat.
You might end up with a few more Bebe’s kids, but you’ll be happier…well, except for the extra kids which bring new arguments. You win some, you lose some, numbers go surfing.
5) Men should marry for love; women should marry for stability.
If a man doesn’t love you head over heels…he’s going to cheat. Period. And ladies, chances are you will have your choice of men who are head over heels for you, choose wisely. Big d*ck doesn’t pay the bills. Now of course I think women should marry for love too, just make sure the fool you are falling in love with has a job.
Word.Life.
Those are some truths you can take to the bank. Good folks of VSB, do you have any other words of wisdom to share?
Oh and here’s a bonus: If you get all of your relationship advice from Steve Harvey’s Strawberry Letter 23 segment, you will die with a lot of cats and no love.
-VSB P aka THE ARSONIST aka VITAMIN P aka TANGLE JIG P aka GIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIRL HE A 3
I put on for my city.
It’s because your email address is simplistic.
Yes.
I’m hating.
…..
Boom.
No, it ain’t!
*does the percolator*
Okay, I’ma go away and come back!!
I’m commenting a little later!! Keep it trill!!!!!
#VSBafterdark gets ugly!! Bubba Sparxxx
“#VSBafterdark gets ugly!!”
Lil Wayne.
I don’t know!!
Letting it all soak in. Nothing to add yet. Good morning and good evening ‘doe!
Damn.
#3 though? Not true…sorry, cant agree there. Just cant. I know plenty of women *ahem* who can love them a leave them.
Dont judge me. I’m a grown woman, I cant do what I want.
Oh, and uh…I’m pretty sure men check out every woman that walks by, not just white ones. Isnt that just a man thing to do? Look at whatever walks by? I thought it was wired in man DNA to check out anything that resembles a female. Maybe I’m wrong.
Also #2…I’m certain that men are WAY more emotional than they like to admit. Cause…some a y’all…goodness gracious…
After #3, I just started skimming…seems about right though
Well, I guess I didn’t have to be the first after all.
i actually completely agree with panny’s #3. and like him, i wont say ALL, but certainly most. there may be many women who are on their hosh*t and dont get caught up in the aftermath of the emotional sh*t storm that comes with sex, but i believe most women’s limbic system (brain’s “emo” center_ has direct and indirect input to their vadges. and therefore women have some type of emotional connection with every man that enters her.
id explain in great detail, as i have many times before, but…. im tired. perhaps in the morning.
@ lady_solitaire
Yes we do look at anything that walks by(provided she is worthy of giving a glance) however if she is comedic to look at we will look too. terrible.
I’ll have to co-signe with you lady_solitare on #3; my initial reaction was like “oh, hell naw!!! That’s definitely not true”.
Not to put my business in the street and all but… yeah, I’m in a situtation now with a really great guy but I’m not really looking for anything more. Everything’s been great between us these past two months but I just haven’t caught those “emotions” yet, and not really sure that I will.
@More is More
I think that your situation has nothing to do with #3. #3 gave reference to women that are not open to emotions where as there wouldn’t be a chance of having an emotional connection with a man because that’s how they handle themselves, like – “let’s enjoy one another and – I’m out.”
You, on the other hand, are open for emotions even though you’re not looking for them. So, you haven’t gotten to the point of emotions not because that’s how you roll, but because it “just aint happenin” with that dude. But you are all for emotions if you are sparked to have them.
@lady_solitaire – i never said men weren’t emotional. get it right, two step and let your shoulder lean. i very much said that emotional men make emotional decision and people end up dead.
viva la bam.
I stand corrected.
*white flag*
@lady_solitaire,
We don’t check out all women, just the ones worth being checked out. There has to be something there that catches our eye besides the fact that she’s female. Even though I don’t particularly care for white women, there are exceptions that have catch my eye from time to time (although this is mostly on TV).
As far as #3 goes, I know a couple of women who have gone into a cut buddy relationship with ‘no strings attached’, but the thing is, it doesn’t remain that way. Eventually, emotions do become involved. So my question is, can a woman maintain a long-term cut-buddy relationship and keep the emotions out of it, seriously?
Oh, I think she can. For some women, their “cut buddy” is someone they’d never really look to as boyfriend or husband material in the first places. So any said emotions become moot. It’s just not happening.
@More is More,
I’ve seen a long-term cut-buddy partnership end when the guy got an actual girlfriend. The woman who he was previously just smashin’, ‘suddenly’ caught feelings when he cut off her off. To say that she didn’t have anything emotional tied after a couple of years of humpin’ before it ended…ehhh, I’m not buying that.
I think their are certain levels of emotions and maybe that’s what we’re missing from this discussion.
I’ve maintained the same cut-buddy for 8 years, and have never looked at that man as more. I just never saw him as relationship material. However, if Sasi Quaia is right in how this was meant, then I can cosign.
“I just never saw him as relationship material. ”
That’s the key. Not fooling yourself into thinking it’s something that it’s not.
8yrs. Got damn!!! Thats longer than most marriages. I also think how often we see our cut buddy will play a role into whether or not emotions are more into play. I would be VERY VERY shocked if you and your 8yr cut buddy were having REGULAR(not once a month) sex throughout all 8yrs with no other people. If you were then damn yall are one helluva a team. All the cut buddies I have had at one point wanted me to be there for them emotionally and a shoulder to cry on. Asking too much. I like boundaries.
Since no one has said it yet. I’ll do it. @ Sanen85, You need more people. 8yrs and no feelings? gtfoh! If this is true, I honestly feel sorry for you. No Bueno.
@coldsweat Yes, the regularity definitely plays a part in it. We are not seeing eachother on the regular and over those 8 years, we have both been in relationships and not seen each other during. I was even married during this period, and yes that marriage didn’t last as long. *shrugs* For instance, I haven’t seen him in a couple months, and I’m just getting the urge to call him. We’ll see eachother a handful of times over the next couple weeks, and then not again for a couple months (although he’s moving now, so this is likely the last time I’ll see him). Like I said, he is there when I need to satisfy my urges and when I’m not in a relationship. In the very beginning we were actually hanging out and trying to see if there was something there, but he’s since made choices in his life that ended the feelings I once started developing. For the longest time, he wanted more but he’s since gotten over that, as we both know we wouldn’t be a good match.
@slickback I’m glad you felt the urge to let me know I need more people 2 days after I’d forgotten about this. I’m curious as to why you feel sorry for me. Are you under the impression that I’m lying? That I’m incapable of feelings? That I’m being used? I really don’t understand this. I feel more sorry for the perpetually single men and women (and lurking in the comments for a while tells me there are plenty on this site) who either don’t get those needs met at all or continue to switch up partners on the regular. If you are truly feeling sorry for me, don’t waste your pity. I don’t need it (nor want it, to be honest) as my situation works for me when I’ve reached a point where I need to be satisfied by the real thing. I hope that my explanation has put your mind to rest and you are no longer concerned about my well-being.
There is no such thing as a long term cutty buddy. If anyone is going to sleep with another person for an extended amount of time, there is going to be at least a ginuine mutual care and attraction for the other person. Fellas, I know you may be in denial, but this is what is called an AFFAIR.
In my opinion, I think a lot of men get all “Diddy” prematurely, and their heightened sensitivity to what they think we think causes them to assume that we are being overly emotional, taking it all personal n shyt, when we are that way with everyone in our lives. If u stand me up, or are late, I’m gonna be pissed. That applies to my mamma, business appointments, and those inconsiderate bastards at my daughters school who always seem to have my daughter’s class be the last on out at the end of the day. If u lie, I won’t trust you, and most importantly, If I make a financial sacrifice for you, and you don’t pay me back, your car may wind up missing, just long enought to report it stolen, so u can get an insurance check, so i can get my dayum money back, it’s not because you don’t want to be with me *see Judge Mathis* It just so happens that in the process of ending any kind of relationship, we realize that at that point, it is a final attempt to collect while we still have a chance… that’s all I’m sayin!
“So my question is, can a woman maintain a long-term cut-buddy relationship and keep the emotions out of it, seriously?”
No.
I guess I’ll be the first to disagree with #3. Other than that, this list seems about right.
@SaneN85 – if I didn’t know any better, i’d say that my inclusion of #3 was an evil attempt to out all the chicks who are okay with the hit-it-and-quit-it doctrine.
lucky for me, i know better.
*snickering loudly*
No Bullsh*t
—3) Women cannot have sex without getting emotionally involved.—
Waits for the group of women to show up and say “But I caaaaan! You don’t know me! Every woman ain’t emotionaaaallll.” and then go register new gmail address and email VSB “why come my chex buddy won’t take me on a date?”
LOL true indeed.
in addition to the hosts of women who have a closet full of hosh*t skeletons that sneak up on them and remind them just how much of an emotional wreck they are from having tons of “meaningless” sex without attachment.
hosh*t does not prevent one from having an emotional connection to their hovictims.
@Gem of the Ocean – and the crowd said, yay men.
I can’t speak for everyone, but I MYSELF am with Gem on this one. I tried to have a casual thing after I got out of a terrible relationship, thinking my temporary hatred of men would prevent me from getting attached. The chex was magnificent, we went out, we stayed in, we did all that ish. And then I realized the temporary hatred wasn’t for all men, but just for my ex, ’cause all of a sudden I had feelings for my cut buddy that weren’t mutual. Ah well, you live and you learn.
I loves ya Gemmie, but I’m not entirely sure why being able to have a cut-buddy with no real emotional attachment makes a person a h*e. I just don’t know where it said that these women were having multiple meaningless-sex partners. Yes, I’m taking this a little personally, and I’m okay with that. I’ve had the same fool as my cut-buddy for years and my feelings have never gone past friendship, in fact that’s in question most of the time. Are you calling me a h*e, Gemmie? Is that what’s going on here?
first of all i never said women who have cut buddies are hos. notice i said “in addition to”.
and the mere fact that you refer to your cut-buddy as a fool yet this is some one who is your friend leads me to believe your emotions are in fact caught up in your sexual life with him. that doesnt mean you’re in love with him (although low key you might be and are just in denial–idk nor do i care for sake of my argument) it just means you are have an emotional connection to him, whatever those emotions may be.
Whoa! Whoa! I was just playin, no need to get all “first of all” on me. I know that’s not what you were saying.
I refer to him as a fool because he is one, not because of any emotional connection. My definition of “emotionally involved” seems to be slightly different and I took it to mean as in have feelings beyond finding that person likeable as a human being/friend. If I was wrong, then yes I am emotionally involved and #3 is true.
ok first of all, sane, dont be tellin me what i need to do. ill get all whatever on you when i please!
lol jk jk jk.
i have a LIST of questions to ask about your cut buddy sitch. perhaps that’ll be a gchat session
Am I in the minority here? *looks around*
My chex buddy and I go out quite frequently and whenever he even hints at something more, I get all jitterly and start thinking “I hope he’s not trying to go there”. I don’t know… still got to disagree with #3!
2 reasons why i would say you’re caught up emotionally: (1) you are actively seeing this chex buddy–would you spend a lot of time with some one you had “no feelings” for? (2) your fear of commitment is an emotion and perhaps a consequence of some other emotional baggage you’re carrying around.
being “emotional” from sex doesnt mean a woman is batsh*t crayz in love. it just means her emotions–good bad or ugly–are tied into her sex life.
@Gem,
I totally agree with this assessment. My idea of sex buddy doesn’t include hanging out all the time.
***Thought the site ate this! Found it! I no longer hate VSB.***
Gem is very on it. If these girls weren’t caught up emotionally, why are we even talking about them? Right after an icky break up, I started sleeping with a real gem (not of the Ocean, but definitely of life). He had absolutely no bf characteristics, he might’ve even sold drugs on the side, but worse, he was short. But he could lay it down like nothing I’d ever experienced before (and I’ve experienced quite a bit). Amazeballs. It was going all good and great until one night he laid some talk on me. He used words like love and compatibility. I didn’t necessarily get all kinds of scary, but I knew this was going to change everything. We were sans emotion before. He’d come when I called and vice versa. If he didn’t pick up or ignored a text, I didn’t cry my eyes out and eat a box of donuts. I just didn’t care that much. But as soon as he started acting funny, I started thinking to myself, “Hmm, could I like him like him? Like really?” My immediate response was always, “No,” but the seeds were already planted. Thinking always gets us in trouble and his change of behavior had a thinking-type reaction. I don’t want to think about you after you leave or a couple days later. That’s an issue.
I agree with whoever said there were levels of emotions involved. But the point is there are emotions involved for the majority of women. As I read #3, I was like, “crap, all these girls are gonna jump on here talking about they’re the one chick out that doesn’t give a damn.” I find that the ones who say they care the least, care the most in a lot of cases. And furthermore, is there something wrong with having some sort of emotional reaction to having someone INSIDE your body? Somehow it wears such a negative veil. Like “ew, you actually like the boy your f*cking? Gosh, you’re so lame.” Last I checked it was okay to be slightly into them. Men don’t have anyone breaking and entering on them, unless their ghei, so it’s not an issue for them. But man, when they get emotional, yikers island.
Oh ps- I really like Panama’s writing (like u too Champ, don’t cry). I have such a random brain and have so many tangent thoughts that no one else gets or think I’m weird and confusing. It’s like reading my own language when he writes. Fast times at Ridgemont High.
So, in essence, if you disagree with #3 you’re probably just convincing people that #3 is correct. Is that the same as having to say you aren’t crazy actually further convinces people that you are like in The Changeling? Okaaay. I’m not saying that I’m completely devoid of emotion and I know I’ve caught feelings before when I had no plans to. I am saying that I don’t think it’s a universal truth that it’s not possible for women to have sex and not catch feelings. I brought up the cut-buddy simply because it is evidence towards why I feel that way, not because I secretly desire him to be the father of my children.
I don’t think there’s anything wrong at all with having that emotional connection. The fact that I don’t have that at all with the cut-buddy is why I tend to only call him (or answer his calls)when I have reached a breaking point. I desire that connection, but I’m not about to sleep around until I find it. My point is that it is possible to have sex w/o feelings, even if most aren’t capable or aren’t capable most of the time. *shrugs*
@sanen85 i think we’re all on the same point more or less. Panama didn’t say all chicks, but most for sure.
“My chex buddy and I go out quite frequently”
Word? Yeah, I would never hang out with my FWB’s. Not at all, not ever.
Yeah of some the vernacular used here is quite entertaining to read, but more so revealing. One VSS has had the same cut buddy for EIGHT years!!! I’ve barely been sexually active for 8 years! I thought one of the main tenants of cut buddydom was variety, you know like leasing a car? Another VSS goes out in public with her CB! So you mean, like on….dates? Other than rubber runs, why do it? Do you kiss each other in the lips too (not those lips freaky ppl)?!
IMO, if you’re kissing someone in the face, having frequent sexual encounters, go out in public, you don’t have other…arragngements with other people, and you have had this agreement for some time, you. are. in. a. relationship. IMO…
It may be a weird, new-age emotionless, kinda selfish relationship, but a relationship nevertheless. Otherwise I need to change my definition of what a cut buddy is.
IMO, if you’re kissing someone in the face, having frequent sexual encounters, go out in public, you don’t have other…arragngements with other people, and you have had this agreement for some time, you. are. in. a. relationship. IMO…
i agree. it may be a weird and awkward “unconventional” relationship, but one nonetheless. full of emotions that KEEP you connected over time. if that aint “sex w/ attachment” idk what is.
Let me clarify, when there is noone else in my life, he has been the one I turn to for the last 8 years. It’s a matter of convenience and the fact that I’ve been with him that keeps me going back, that is all. He just happens to be the person I can turn to for my needs when I am not in a relationship. I thought the point of a cut-buddy was to satisfy physical needs. I didn’t realize that variety was the point, but I’m not looking to have multiple partners like that. If I don’t have someone in my life that can actually lead to more, then I fall back on the reserves (my cut-buddy). There are no real emotions involved, just human urges. He quenches my
@Malia – does your daddy know that you’re on here on VSB. I don’t want secret service all up and through my home rummaging thru my closet.
time of death@ PJ’s comment to Malia 11:11 AM
@Panama
Secret Service!?!? You’re dealing with a black man who may be the most powerful cat in the world … you should hope he sends the Secret Service. Soul Brother Barack is probably going to send Rahm Emmanuel affer you.
hahaha…I wonder what POTUS and FLOTUS will have to say once the little ones start going there.
Sending people to your home is so Bill Clinton era. We’re on some Enemy of the State ish. Check your smoke detector.
Hilarious.
Good points Panama. I have a whole lot to say about this topic but I will wait til those who don’t believe insert their heads into their a$$es.
@Sandpaper – lol. good idea.
Oh gawd, wow.
But I’m down with number four…subscribing. A little lovin’ puts it all in context.
Here’s one: Men who talk about ow much p*ssy they get, only get 10% of that figure….if any
cosign
Bwahahahaha… I don’t know why but the fact that you’re a dude and cosigning this is f!cking comedy to me.
Im greek and when I hear some greeks talk im like ninja please all that ish didnt go down like that!!! Lyin on yo D
@Chellz – yeah that’s true. i’m gonna remix this one, R. Kelly style (no showers)…
Women who are the mousiest are usually the biggest le freaks. if i hear one more story about some chick that i didn’t even know had a voice but turns out she can do a 4 legged handstand on top of a ladder while hanging from a chandelier…just for some lovin…well, i aint got that far yet in my thoughts…but i’m sure i’ll think or do something!
Always the quiet ones that surprise you…or, so I’ve been told. LOL
Absolutely…@Chellz & Panama Jackson
@Chellz, Yup.
And if asked, women will NEVER give their correct number of sexual partners. All types of conditions are made so they only count the ones that they want to count.
“All types of conditions are made so they only count the ones that they want to count.”
Of course we do. *wink* That’s why I say you shouldn’t ask. Chances are, you won’t get the real number anyway. If the number is higher than zero some of you kats start acting all funnystyle.
Long time no talk, good to see ya round.
Now of course I think women should marry for love too, just make sure the fool you are falling in love with has a job.
Word.Life.
“Romance without finance is a nuisance.” That’s what I heard.
Also, #shoutout to The Bible.. “……If a man will not work, he shall not eat.” (2 Thessalonians 3:10.)
@AliLaine4 – i wonder if the Bible has like a “Recession Edition”
i wonder if the Bible has like a “Recession Edition”
HA!! In these times, it should!! But a man that has NO drive (playing Madden all day) to do anything (that’s legal) to provide, or to better himself in between time as well (back in school, career workshops, etc.), we have an issue sir.
1) Being an equal opportunity dirty old man, I check out women of all hues and cultures. Just window shopping, ain’t buyin’ nothin’.
2) I am not playing the emo card to get horizontal. “Break out or be clowned” Pac
3) Not marrying for love. I will forget her name. “It’s Baby ain’t it” Morris Day
An old man on his hoveround at Walgreen’s yesterday told me he was gonna hit me, throw me in his basket and take me home. Is this the kinda dirty ‘ol man you’re gonna be?.
bahahaha thats funny. I feel like Id say some foolish ish like that just because when your old you can get away with saying alot of off the wall ish and people find it sweet/funny.
I let him make it since he was an older kat. Trust, if he was younger he definitely woulda been a throat punch candidate.
******ahem, ahem****** where you been ??? missed you & your opinion round these parts, good to see you, that is all
@Ulysses – i cant lie, i’m looking forward to being a dirty old man too.
Your dirtyoldmandom is gonna be disturbing, I just know it.
Agreed…lol
Though we don’t plan to ride everything that walks, we do size you up and down, and up some more. If we’re right, it’s as if we won the Lotto.
@LovingMe4Me – i know quite a few women who have told me and my boys that they have some secret formulas for attempting to determine a man’s size, etc. My counter is always, whats the point of deducing it if you’re never going to find out. It’s like cheating. You’re not wrong because you don’t know, but you might be right, bc you just might be right. It’s the ultimate hedged bet.
I like hedges. green ones.
“Sure there are women out there with very few emotions and operate like men. These women are not to be f*cked with because what if they do get caught up? They start acting like emotional men and somebody gets killed. That’s no bueno. Not that I’m completely against murder, I’m just saying murder the right people, dig? “
First of all, am I wrong to think that even if those women can truly be emotionless and have relations w/ men that something tragic to semi-traumatizing/hurtful has happened to her?
Second of all, I laughed my tail off that. Especially @ “Not that I’m completely against murder”… I’m like, “It’s okay to be.”
@Hawaii – that something tragic to semi-traumatizing/hurtful has happened to her?
i tend to wonder it hat something tragic was a really dirty dude who stole her soul and leased that joint out to a third party.
OR she signed with Puffy at some point.
AHahahahahahahahahahaha! Yeah, it was Puffy- his a§§ *smh*…. messes up everybody’s life!
Dude. All this is real talk. No sportscasters.
@KayBeezy – thanks.
Women cosign each other even if their friend is on a crazy tip. (I noticed this with my friends and it makes me think woman, including myself, are crazy). My friends come to me for advice after they get advice from others. I’m like their bullshit filter and I notice that some of the shit their friends cosign them on is batshit insane! Seriously, if your girlfriend asks you “do you think I should slice his tires for cheating on me?” You have to say flat out NO!
Lmao…it reminds me of this one time my cousin asked me if she should put honey in her sisters makeup to get back at her and I was like…don’t do that shit. That only makes you look insane and immature…smh
Women folk cosign each others insane bullshyt and are mad when men will not and then ask; “why can’t you just support me sometimes? Cause you used to be “the shyt” now you’re just full of it. On another note, facebook is idiotic. (or is it some people on facebook? Both) I wish I would wake up one morning and facebook is in ashes.
Some people definitely don’t know the difference between supporting good shyt and enabling bad shyt.
@TheTalentedMs.Fiasco – sometimes i actually wonder if most women are really trying to sabotage the relationships of other women just in case they don’t end up with a man themselves. seriously.
in fact, my advice to women i know is to ONLY consult with your happily coupled up women friends. they have a certain clarity that comes from regular insertion practices.
true dat.
The 1 universal truth is
There are none. Do you, and ask what you wanna know, clarify if confused and take a mofo
For his word unless his word is “love” and then his action should back it up
Don’t expect more than you can provide and don’t accept less for the sake of being boo’ed up.
All the other shyt is. A waste of time
Kiss
Keep it simple stupid. Lol and I’m out!
StATISTICS! .
This is why I love you!
I’m not racist, I just do statistics…
NAME THAT REFERENCE!
“The 1 universal truth is
There are none.”
So you don’t believe there are universal laws sis?
@natasha
the unversal laws i believe in
for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction
and
you reap what you sow.
other than that?
Oh ok sis. I misunderstood universal truths for universal laws. Sorry.
so, when is your album dropping? cause i need to buy it. your flow is crazylike.
lol
@shay-d-lady – why are you trying to kill the universal truth game.
why do you hate love and why wont you let me be great?
@panama Jackson why are you trying to kill the universal truth game.
why do you hate love and why wont you let me be great?
I dont hate love, i love love and all that love has to offer, you can say that ima love overlover that is why i know aint no sucha thang as rules when it comes to love!
as far as letting you be great? you get enough co signage, my comments help you become great because they help you clarify your arguments. so in the end its all for you, boo! LOL
“Don’t expect more than you can provide and don’t accept less for the sake of being boo’ed up.”
That right there…is real talk. I’ma have to call you Shayhova for this.
Shay-d-lady,
Do you have a facebook fan club???? I need to join it!
Rules, shmules. The day the people who deal out all those rules have a healthy dating/married/single life, I’ll listen to them.
The day the people who deal out all those rules have a healthy dating/married/single life, I’ll listen to them .
Exactly! Even if they do have a healthy *insert something* I still will only half listen. People can miss me with all of the rules/”universal” truths. I make my own rules. I’m like T.I. Phuck a
MixtapeRule and You Don’t Know Me!As always, we are >><< here.
“Big dyck don’t pay the bills.” Wow. Clearly this is where I’ve been dropping the ball. *snicker*
@miss t-lee – you got creditors calling you?
Boy stop.
1. I think this can go for all women. Men look period. That’s what ya’ll do.
3. I know this about myself. This is why I am waiting for marriage. I don’t want my emotions to get me to make dumb decisions. Thats me.
4. Perfect points. We have to think with our heads and our hearts as women. That is what discernment is. I use it all the time.
I know Steve Harvey gets a lot of backlash, but my theory is you do not know who GOD will use to help you. If the person(s) has great advice than take it. We don’t know where or who are blessings will come from. I feel like I am wiser because I am always open to learn not so much worried where it comes from.
cosign!
@ lola289 Thanks sis:)
@ Panama LOL! LOVE u!
@Natasha – you know you cant argue when God enters the equation. lol. that’s usually how i end arguments.
“yo…why are we arguing, God did this”
Co-sign on all EXCEPT big D won’t pay your bills but it may help get a few of theirs paid. Not that I’ve ever done that…but I had heard that’s what be happenin.
I’m a lurker. On a horse
@Daisy – welcome and sh*t.
i’m wondering if i could in good faith, let a woman pay my bills for me if i can pay them myself. i’m not sure i could. my daddy raised me better than that.
@Panama Jackson,
Yeah, I’m the same way. Even hearing offers make me feel awkward.
Where do y’all hang? I keep running into the guys Daisy is hearing about.
You know yo’ daddy, which already gave you a head start in this life.
um..
im feeling a wierd sense of dejavu. uptown baby.
didnt you people already just finish tellin me that women are irrational and too emotional and men + emotions = sex is on my mind?
and if these truths are universal, i guess that means that if a dude lives in a place where there are no white women.. that he is still encompassed by said rule?
i didnt get the memo, am i supposed to care that dudes look at white women? can we stop assuming that every black woman dies a little inside when a black man is seen with/talks to/double penetrates a white chick? unless you are getting in the way of me paying my bills, i. dont. business. plus we all know that if it’s got breasts (real, fake or otherwise), y’all are gonna look. general truth: men have NO idea on how to subtly check out a girl even if they are with their girl. my mom used to say this to me as a kid and it applies here:
“just when you think i dont know, thats when i know”. meaning, when you think you got away with something, guess again sucka!
oh and: “chances are you will have your choice of men who are head over heels for you, choose wisely”. chances are that WHAT??? what alternate universe are YOU living in? there are plenty of dudes to choose from who want me to put my heels over and behind my head. but head over heels? in the same article in which you say most men wont emote unless they want pu$$y? je suis confused. which one is it?
and if we have so many chances to have a choice of men who are head over heels – why the recent tsunami of blogs/mags/tv/movie/barbershop quartets of the ‘single black woman’? why is there a movement telling me (a woman, regardless of skin tone), to settle and to STOP waiting for love? (yes, i know the answer is because it sells).
moral of the story: there is only 1 universal truth – time waits for no one, so live your life (#no ti/riri).
i dunno. maybe i should just go to my bed and stop being an a$$hole.
LOL yeah i think you were being the whole arse, actually.
but i loved it. lmbo.
@muze: i was feeling a lil cactus-like after reading the post.
what can i say? lol.
and if these truths are universal, i guess that means that if a dude lives in a place where there are no white women.. that he is still encompassed by said rule?
This gives white women that much more of a allure. Look twice as hard. jk
“can we stop assuming that every black woman dies a little inside when a black man is seen with/talks to/double penetrates a white chick?”
double penetrates….wow just wow
“oh and: “chances are you will have your choice of men who are head over heels for you, choose wisely”. chances are that WHAT??? what alternate universe are YOU living in? there are plenty of dudes to choose from who want me to put my heels over and behind my head. but head over heels? in the same article in which you say most men wont emote unless they want pu$$y? je suis confused. which one is it?”-
keisha brownXXX________xxxbajanflchick 100% cosigning to the fifty elem million power****** another reason why you & me =ebuddies 4 life !
e-buddies for liiiiiiiiife!!! lol.
thanks for the co-sign bajan-ooman!
@ Keisha Brown
“i didnt get the memo, am i supposed to care that dudes look at white women? can we stop assuming that every black woman dies a little inside when a black man is seen with/talks to/double penetrates a white chick? ”
Now you know these ‘urban’ (ie black) blogs have to perpetuate the idea that black women fear white women will hypnotize all black men simply by walking down the street.
“why the recent tsunami of blogs/mags/tv/movie/barbershop quartets of the ’single black woman’? why is there a movement telling me (a woman, regardless of skin tone), to settle and to STOP waiting for love? (yes, i know the answer is because it sells). ”
It’s that and it’s a great way for more men to simply stop being gentlemen and play on the idea that all women are sooooo afraid of being single to the point where anything (well, almost anything) with a pulse and penis will do. Some women settle for things that just pulsate.
@Ivyette – Now you know these ‘urban’ (ie black) blogs have to perpetuate the idea that black women fear white women will hypnotize all black men simply by walking down the street.
really? thanks for laying out our mission. i had done forgot what it was. lol.
@Ivyette: Some women settle for things that just pulsate
exactly. and it’s ruining ish for the rest of us!! they need to stop it!!
@Keisha Brown and Ivyette,
““why the recent tsunami of blogs/mags/tv/movie/barbershop quartets of the ’single black woman’?”
‘Cause obviously, there’s enough out there who wants to tell their story. The responsibility isn’t solely on the medium. Some of these women ARE seeking attention (maybe because they’re single) and they promote it themselves.
Just sayin’.
@Monk.
Absolutely. You are very much right on that one.
But if PJ’s universal truth held to be true, they wouldn’t be on tv whining about being smart and single.
THANK YOU keisha brown!! I came here to write this comment and now I don’t have to. When I read that, I was thought to myself, “Aww hayle, I must be going about this ALL KINDS OF WRONG!!”
@Yonnie 3000 – just like a woman, let another woman do all the work.
* ducking tomatoes *
WHAT?!?!?
Co-fcuking sign!
@jai: i look forward to your daily avis! lmao!!
@keisha brown – ummmmm…no.
@PJ: umm no to what? please explain. inquiring minds would like to know.
Keisha you can’t be spreading all this good knowledge! You took the words out of my head.
But this:
““just when you think i dont know, thats when i know”. meaning, when you think you got away with something, guess again sucka!”
we can smell the lies and feel em too. it’s a gift. that’s why some black men can’t handle black women…they want to take the easy way out and only date 2520s or asians.
keep on being an a$$hole. I swear you are my sister.
aww. thanks SFG!
once in a while, gotta bring em out, bring em out.
Of course, we let you catch us from time to time checking out other women. If you really knew just how much and who, you’d kill us. If we never got caught, you’d think we were gay. We walk the fine line between masculinity and getting balls chopped off.
:-0
good point.
touche kamakula.
oh and: “chances are you will have your choice of men who are head over heels for you, choose wisely”. chances are that WHAT??? what alternate universe are YOU living in? there are plenty of dudes to choose from who want me to put my heels over and behind my head. but head over heels? in the same article in which you say most men wont emote unless they want pu$$y? je suis confused. which one is it?
Girl look at who you talking to… these ninjas don’t know what they want one second to the next they d@mnselves- smh
@ Yeah…So:
*shaking my head and contemplates switching teams.
and by switching teams meaning becoming a lesbian. cuz clearly this hetero thing just aint working out for me.
wait… did you just hit on me a lil? *side eye* lol j/k
maybe a lil tiny one. lolllllllllllllllll
Yes to EVERYTHING you said…
sad but tru. men are caught up by white chicks…or asian. :-/
Emotionless chicks are scary… keep ur emotions ladies just get wiser!
My great grandmother always said:
A man should always love his lady MORE than she loves him…
that and…
marry the 1st time for LOVE
and 2nd for the money! lol!
@lola289 – i never completely understood the asian sensation fetish that took over for a while. perhaps its cuz all the asians (not including like Indians and the like) were all uber nerdy in my classes and were about as asexual as starfish. so perhaps i just hung at the wrong places in life…like AP classes.
“asexual as starfish” LOL! you got me! thats funny ish!
“asexual as starfish” lol!
Adding a universal truth my mother passed along to me from one of her male friends:
men will always do what’s easiest and best for them”
There needs to be a way to delete posts. This was supposed to be a cosign
My mother must have known your great grandmother because she preached both those points.
maybe not universal, but MY truth..
1. as soon as you show a little “i don’t need you” muscle.. they will notice it and come running back!”
it is at this point that i look around and say something like “who me?! don’t you SEE i’m so far past you, i’ve lapped you twice!”
2. no matter what men say, women will twist it to their own truth because we’re a sucka for love (no danity kane)
3. men will remember what is important to them.. (i.e. my birthday was not important enough for my ex to remember)
4. men are horrible liars.. (or maybe i’m just that good)
5. men will do what they want to do, at the moment they want to do it..
as they evolve, other things like “i’ll do it because she asked me to and i don’t want to fight” start taking over..
~Fin
i gotta get off here.. (#TWSS)
“3. men will remember what is important to them.. (i.e. my birthday was not important enough for my ex to remember)- unfortunately, I too have experienced this & am nodding and approving this message as well ****We do learn from experience though, so permanent note to self I don’t give a dam what else is going on , and I have had an ex tell me “I don’t remember my mothers birthday”- EXCUUUUUUSE Me, my reply, is your mama chexin you & giving you the bestest brain ever? No I didn’t think so, so pardon me for not giving a dam about your mama today.-***(sorry I was having a moment like Jilly from Philly)
@Bajan
MY GIRL!!!
my ex forgot my birthday EVERY YEAR we were together.. then woul dpitch a fit when i told him he forgot it.. one year, i sat in the kitchen and had to watch him while he punched the wall..
i thank God for him though because i have so many stories for my blog it’s unbelieveable!!!
oh.. and when i talked about moving out of Florida.. he mentioned something about not wanting to be away from his mother’s cooking.. (we’re talking about this at the courthouse, mind you.. the day we got our marriage license)
i told him, “then you can marry YO MOMMA.. she’s available now, since yo DADDY left!!”
(rude, yes.. but it got the point across..)
i told him, “then you can marry YO MOMMA.. she’s available now, since yo DADDY left!!”
LOL…I spit out my Crystal Light on that one!
He forgets your birthday every year…but if you forget his, you don’t care about him, you don’t appreciate him and all that he does for you, you are ungrateful, etc (feel free to insert a man’s ignant excuse for him acting like a puss…feline here).
I am glad that you endured most/some of this cuz your blog gives me my extra shyts and giggles
of the day!
5. men will do what they want to do, at the moment they want to do it..
as they evolve, other things like “i’ll do it because she asked me to and i don’t want to fight” start taking over..
Women like to threaten men who are emotionally involved with them. Look boo I can’t stop you from doing whatever it is that you’re going to do so make yourself happy. (And be willing to prosper with the outcomes.)
I think I might need to work out my “i don’t need you” muscle (as well as my, “I’m not always available to you (not chexually, getcho mind out the gutter)” muscle. Problem is, it feels like a game and I HATE games. I mean, either I do want him to stick around and I should tell him, or I don’t want him to stick around, and to pretend otherwise would be cruel and dishonest. Why am I gonna want him to stick around but act like I don’t? Sigh. I guess you either play the game or the game plays you.
Yeah, you have a kindred spirit in me. I don’t like to play the game either. I always thought honesty and being yourself was best. But you can’t really put yourself out there time after time because dudes respond less than favorably to that. You DO have to pull back even when you want to pull them closer and “wait and see” when you’d rather be blowing up their phone. “The game”, as much as I HATE it (and I sincerely do, with the heat of a thousand suns), is not going anywhere. I think that needs to be another universal truth:
The game is not going anywhere. Play or be played.
@Yonnie300 @KitKatCuty
gimme a minute to preach something to you..
it is a Human Truth that scarcity=demand
I don’t know many people that actually cherish things (moments, people) until they are no longer available.
This is not a game, it is a truth that you need to understand. I thought the same way, “why would i act like i’m too busy (when i’m doing nothing) when i just want you to come around and make my day bright?” they go on about their business, and i’m home watching jeopardy by myself all to “Prove a point”..
i will say, after i thought about it.. i will just make myself busy.. it won’t be an act. i’ll have to pretend nothing. i told myself that if i’m doing nothing but sitting on the couch, then those are my plans and i’m busy..
it’s not a game if it’s the truth.. we’re known for making time because we’d rather them be around.. i wouldn’t wash my hair for days because he was coming around and my things kept getting pushed to the side..
tipping the scales in order to balance isn’t such a bad thing.. try it..
i don’t wanna hog up space and get into the psychology and dynamics of it.. but space is not a bad thing..
You’re right, of course. And I was agreeing with you. In the beginning, it does feel like a childish game and that you’re cooperating with something you don’t agree with, but, as things progress and you get used to the idea, you start to realize how necessary it all is and it doesn’t seem like a game at all. I totally agree. The process of realizing that, however, isn’t an entirely pleasant one and it does involve more alone time than we’re used to.
But, while pretending I was busy, I got tired of pretending I was busy and actually GOT busy, whether with a companion or on my own. I’m learning Spanish, I’m working on a creative project, I started blogging (I know, I know, I’m the last one who DIDN’T have a blog, lol), I’m going out more with friends and to events, and I’m continuing my weight-loss journey (thirty-four pounds lost since December). Yea me!
I realize I’m a day late (and a dollar short) on this post but out of ALL the true, real sh!t that’s been said in these comments KitKat what you said made me have to just take a moment and shake my head. I can’t co-sign what you just said enough. Spoke volumes right there girl.
@Nickerz – 2. no matter what men say, women will twist it to their own truth because we’re a sucka for love (no danity kane)
i could have started and ended the post with that, but then folsk would be all mad cuz it was only like 20 words.
4. men are horrible liars.. (or maybe i’m just that good)
No, they are just bad…in fact a lot of men will lie, catch amnesia, forget what they lied about, try to make up a new lie and make you believe the ‘new’ lie that they used to cover up the ‘old’ lie (the one they never said…bu you remembered, hell, they left it on a vm or text…smh)
you aint got to lie craig, you aint got to lie…
@ Jai
I told my ex, “you are not even good at cleaning up after yourself.. much less when you have to cover up the lies..
case in point: he got busted by a stack of receipts from Universal Studios.. and a movie ticket stub..
*Slap administered..*
I’m tired of saying “if it seems like i’m asking you the same question over and over.. then i already KNOW the answer and i’m giving you time to come with the truth..”
they don’t believe me.. til it turns ugleeee.. (i was young, don’t judge me)
@Nickerz
I agree we need a vss support group. I need to get more work done at work. *sigh* But yes men are horrible liars cause they don’t think of everything and are not thorough as we are. Sometimes just pretending that you already know will get them to tell on themselves…dummies.
#3. This is true. And birthdays are not important to me. So, I mostly don’t remember them. I write them down. Because they are important to other people. And I’d rather make someone happy for one day, than myself miserable for the next week or month (see your #5).
#2 Your first instinct when someone does or says something is to ascribe to that situations motivation as if it was you who said or did it. It is easy to get caught up in this egocentric view of the world and essentially interpret things to mean what you’d like, rather than the truth.
What’s wrong with arguing?! I may be here on a near deserted island inhabited only by other weirdos, but I actually enjoy a little sparing match every now and then between my women and I. Ok…I like a lot of banter and debate here and there. Fighting, not so much, but between two mature, secure adults arguments can be like a sport:-) Seriously, if you are attracted to smart, opinionated women as I assume most VSB’s are, I would think it would come with the territory. Yes, “men and women speak two totally different languages 95 percent of the time “, but for me that’s the challenge, the intrigue. Now with that being said, if most of your arguments/intense discussions are centered on trivial stuff like leaving your socks on the floor, you should just take the VSB’s advice and shut up, pick up the socks, then bone.
My parents have been happily married for 30+ years. When I was a teenager my mom told me one of the ‘secrets’ to a happy marriage was the ability to have one good argument a day, to you know…get it all out. Part of her reasoning was that no matter how compatible a couple is, they aren’t the same person and will have disagreements about something. So isn’t it better to just get it out and have some good ol’ proverbial make-up sex? Conversely, she said sleeping on your wrath is the 2nd easiest way to become friends with a divorce lawyer. So her mantra was to be happy, have at least one mini-argument a day. In her mind, it also helped keep the relationship spicy. She hypothesized that arguments were a product of passion and not a bad thing if they didn’t lead to fights. She didn’t explain how you prevent the argument from escalating to a fight tho. That’s probably the part where you interject the sex and she left it out purposely because of my age:-/ At the time, it sounded quite dysfunctional and a wee bit nuts. But now it makes a lil more sense.
If you dislike spicy foods, DO NOT take her advice to the bank, 3 decades of experience notwithstanding.
@Courtney (VSB)
“What’s wrong with arguing?!”
Nothing at all. I think it’s cute and sexy when two people have differences, try to be all dramatic and pouty, and then make up right after.
“If you dislike spicy foods, DO NOT take her advice to the bank, 3 decades of experience notwithstanding.”
I’ll remember that because I have a low tolerance for anything spicy, well except for a relationship.
P.S.= thanks for putting ‘VSB’ after your name. I was sometimes confused by some of your responses.
You know, in a series of uncharacteristically dtizy moments, I didn’t even think about my asexual name until the Test post.
I hate arguing. I know of no one who got stabbed because the conversation was too pleasant. Why can’t we all just get along? Rodney King. Stand around holding hands singing Kumbaya. Boy Scouts. Seems like an intellectual man and intellectual woman should be able to have an intellectual discussion without it becoming a sparring match. Mel Gibson. I state my case. You state your case. You realize I’m right. Life goes on. Penitentiary.
I love to debate/argue/whatever-it-is-you-call-it. I don’t seek it out though, but I damn sure don’t back down from it. The “rules” of arguing are as follows:
1. Do NOT argue in public (a la Marcus + Angela in …”Married too?”)–it’s tacky and as much as you and your SO may know it’s “how y’all do” other people do not know that…thus the cops may get called. No bueno!
2. Do NOT hit below the belt–you know where your SO’s pressure points are so don’t go there unless you intend to end the relationship right then and there.
3. Know when to walk away–True story…My ex didn’t vote. Now, to some folks, that doesn’t bother them. But to me, it shows a lack of consciousness about the world around you. It baffled me further that he didn’t vote, was a parent, and served active duty in the military. All of which meant he SHOULD have had a stake in what goes down in the world around him. He was so convinced that it didn’t matter that I contemplated breaking up with him on the spot. I should have…would have saved me a lot of headache in the future.
**The point is that if you can’t see eye to eye on stuff that’s important to you, regardless of how petty/shallow it may seem to some, it’s not time to bang it out. You shoudl walk away**
“Why can’t we all just get along? Rodney King.”
Becuz it’s hella BORING!
@Mo
*Jots down notes* I love your argument rules. Especially number 2. And number 1. And number 3 too actually. I’m going to go watch “I’m a Grown Lil’ Man” again to celebrate my island not being completely deserted!
@Yeah…So
Simplistic beauty.
@Courtney(VSB)
Awww you sweet (thanx)… kinda makes me wish I didn’t have so many typos in my response below to your comment *sigh*
Thanks…I try.
I’m a VSS, btw. Because my nickname is unisex (I guess???) I felt I needed to make that clear. (although, the use of male pronouns when referring to my SO should have given that away)
@Mo,
Maybe you should be Mo (VSS)- lol
@Courney (VSB) – i see your point and i get it…but word life, i do not enjoy arguing. now debating…okay. but arguing, you can have that.
I am so with you on that! Debate is engaging, and we can talk about imposing views even if ours are the same, but arguing,…, not so much for me. I don’t need make up sex….I’M GOOD. #THATISALL
–Conversely, she said sleeping on your wrath is the 2nd easiest way to become friends with a divorce lawyer.–
What is the easiest way?
Something about money. Like hiding money or something. She feels like money will kill a marriage before infidelity (from a man). She’s a firm believer in joint checking accounts and all that ish. Yes, she’s mad ol skool. But the older I get, surprisingly the more sensible she sounds. But I’d NEVER admit that to her.
You get a *thumbs up* from me on this… arguing is cool in a relationship… as long as no one takes isht personally… It’s them sensitive mofos you got to be carefully of cuz they can’t let sh*t go for nothing… ugh! Like to argue too (not erday, but here and there) it definitely keeps things interesting… and hawt!
I meant *I like… womp womp
#6 – Men are men, women are women. Quit bitching about how “women are too emotional” or “men are so trifling.” There is a certain Bullsh*t Threshold that you signed up for if you intend to date the opposite sex. If you can deal with it, perhaps heterosexuality really isn’t your thing.
@I Am Your People – such a killjoy. The inability to recognize and acknowledge such truths is why the relationship industry is a billion dollar one and why Hill Harper is somehow…famous?
Cosign. And might I add that sometimes I think it was intentional that our biggest pet peeves were put into the people to whom we’d be most attracted.
Shots at Gem, though? Nawww, threesir.
Example of #2- See Cuba Gooding in Boyz *punches air muttering gibberish snot face*
#3- Most of the experience I have in this comes from hearing and not doing, so because I have not directly had the experience, I’ll just agree and make this sammich.
#5- I wish men and women would both marry for love and stability. Not just financial stability, but also the kind you get from making sure all of your ducks are in a row before you decide to invite someone into your secret playground of crazy. Those untapped emotions, or those hurts from the playground, whose scars have somewhat faded yet still leave you with a burden the size of Aretha’s best fur. Before entering long-term (heck, even 24 hour) relationships, I think we’d do ourselves huge favors if we evaluated ourselves. I think O’Shea said it best with “Check yourself before you wreck yourself. Birds like you is bad for my health.” Or something like that.
@Beez – re what you said re #5… awww, me too.
(1) thanks for supportin me, nanny mcbeez!!! pursheeatecha
(2) your thoughts on #5 are solid and i completely agree. very well stated!
Hmmmm….
Some of my semiuniversal truths:
1. People make time for what is important to them.
2. You must communicate and say what you want. There are no mind readers and no one has time for such games.
3. Go after what you want, even at the risk of rejection-what’s so scary about being told ‘no’?
4.Do not continue to rationalize annoying/bad/immature behavior. It’ll only get worse if changes are not made.
5.Most people do not change. They only find better ways to mask their actions, but if you have a tightly meshed bs filter, you can avoid trouble.
start your blog already.
@ Dave
Thanks, Dave. But I’d hate to clog the wireless waves with my common sense. It’s just basic stuff that most people know already. I think.
“1. People make time for what is important to them.”
Cosign! This was one of the most eye-opening, light bulb moments to the past 10-years of my life. Knowing this, and more importantly accepting this, has made the difference between me looking sane and looking like a fool.
2. Cosign again! I think my past relationships would have sustained a higher survival rate if the women I dated understood this! How am I to know that the reason you mentioned your girlfriend’s trip to Jamaica 5 times was because you wanted us to go, too? How about just say “Let’s go to Jamaica!” Sure, it’d be nice for me to know you well enough to know that when you sneeze in a high pitch it means you want sex, but you’ve gotta give me time to learn these things and not expect that within two months.
3. Cosign! Like the age old saying goes, “It’s better to have tried and failed than never to have tried at all.”
You are on point this morning….too bad you like to argue!
@Caballeroso
“How about just say “Let’s go to Jamaica!”
Well, because you already said it, when do we leave?
“You are on point this morning….too bad you like to argue!”
In the context of what Courtney (no Cox) typed, I don’t mind a debate or a small bit of sparing. Then you kiss and makeup. I don’t mean a furniture moving, screaming match…..now back to that trip.
@Ivyette – 3. Go after what you want, even at the risk of rejection-what’s so scary about being told ‘no’?
LOL. this one must have been directed at women b/c men hear no…a lot. women not so much. sometimes i tell random women on the metro “no” just to see the stunned look on their face until they realize 1) they don’t know me; and 2) they didnt even ask mea question.
“no” is that puzzling for women.
I’m usually 100% in agreement with the whole, “men know how to deal with no way better than women” argument, but then how do you explain the men that cuss you out and call you everything but a child of god when you say no to them in a POLITE way?
What be wrong wit dem mens right thurr?
@ 8th Wonder
“how do you explain the men that cuss you out and call you everything but a child of god when you say no to them in a POLITE way?”
In my best Martin voice: Dey craaazzzzy, derrrraaanged
Not being afraid of no isn’t just about relationships, but with jobs, asking for a favor, or even asking the cable company for a discount.
And you need to stop just randomly telling women ‘no’ who didn’t even ask you anything. But the image made me lol.
@Ivyette: me likey this whole list. esp number 1. i tell that to dudes who are on dating sites, but then claim to be too busy to pursue/call a chick and you know..actually try to..DATE.
grrr… (#nodmx)
@Keisha Brown
“but then claim to be too busy to pursue/call a chick and you know..actually try to..DATE.”
Sometimes I wonder if people scurry around hustle to all these ‘meetings’, sit on every ‘committee’, and talk on a cellphone to impress others or to make it seem as if they’re getting things done.
I freakin cosign everything you just listed. You just made my day
@T
“I freakin cosign everything you just listed. You just made my day”
Thanks and I will freakin’ e-hug you.
I agree with your whole list
3. Go after what you want, even at the risk of rejection-what’s so scary about being told ‘no’? I understand this logically but it’s still hard for me to practice.
@Often Confused
Yep. Don’t let those butterflies in your stomach or accelerated heart beat stop you. Take a deep breath and dive right in it.
(That can be taken in so many ways, but you know what I mean!)
*the perv gallery need not reply*
Yep. Don’t let those butterflies in your stomach or accelerated heart beat stop you. Take a deep breath and dive right in it.
(That can be taken in so many ways, but you know what I mean!)
*the perv gallery need not reply*
well damn….i will save my comment of ‘that’s what he said’ LOL
Cosign.
@KitKatCuty84
Hi five.
I agree with everything except number 5. People can change, sadly they dont the motivation to change until something bad happens tho….but we can change.
“If a man doesn’t love you head over heels…he’s going to cheat. Period.”- Question, is this guaranteed??? Seriously???? If that is the case, then you are saying, if he cheats then he doesn’t love you head over heels? Is it really THAT simple??? I’m not saying that I don’t believe you, just saying that I bet some folks would be up for arguing that point, I have heard a gozillion and one reasons for cheating, and NOT this one. So then you are saying it is possible to be HEAD OVER HEELS FOREVER????????? You can call me crazy- No Guy, but this really sounds like some PanmaJ of VSB Unicorn stuff- I just haven’t heard this–You need more people on this one, other wise I think the list makes sense, or not, you be the judge.
unicorn
@bajanflchick – this comment confused me. i need orange juice.
i’m generally speaking early on though. not after 30 years of marriage.
“1) Every man checks out white women. Period.”
Every man just checks out “pretty” women white or otherwise. Sula said best last week. Pretty is pretty no matter what the color. We who carry they male chromo are just on some Captain Kirk sh*t. (Never seen a giggedy green girl though.) Besides anyone who has been to WalMart knows Mexicans will holla (Come here girl let me holla at cha! Holla, holla. holla. holla…) at every woman they get near.
“5) Men should marry for love; women should marry for stability.”
Both parties should strive to give their partners both. Stability may just get an actual bed but love is going to keep both sides of that m********* warm.
Wu Young’s universal truths about men and women.
First, We both overthink about the wrong sh*t thusly proving my second truth: Men and women aren’t nearly as smart as we think we are.
“Both parties should strive to give their partners both. Stability may just get an actual bed but love is going to keep both sides of that m********* warm.”
THIS!!!!
it’s a bit too long for a t-shirt but…
*rounds of appplause*
I think that Helagramki said it even better when he remarked, “the average dude…knows a bad chick of any complexion when he sees one.”
@Wu Young – Every man just checks out “pretty” women white or otherwise.
i could have easily written that, but nobody would have been upset by it then. lol
Who’s bad? You bad.
“Every man just checks out “pretty” women white or otherwise. Sula said best last week. Pretty is pretty no matter what the color.”
I agree. In general, in terms of ogling, I think men in general are actually pretty equal opportunity. I mean, equal opportunity pretty.
Or whatever.
5) Men should marry for love; women should marry for stability.
Translations
Stability = Money = Freemales should marry for it
Love = Only heaven knows what this means but men should get married for it.
Wu Young- As usual, I am worshipping at the temple of your greatness *, that is all..
I’m not all of that. girl I’m mad overrated! Drake.
I don’t think I agree with #2 cuz I’ve dealt with some emotional men. I’m not talkin about the tell me about your feelings type ish that would just prove your point. I’m talkin about the b*tcha$$ness, unnecessary clinginess, not saying what you mean and expecting me to just know, etc.
@Deeds – I didn’t say those men didn’t exist.
“or look like they only like Black meat.”
Amanda Bynes
Every man checks out white women. Period.
Thats like saying that black women feel or should feel inferior to white women. I check out white men…what does that mean to black men. Does that mean that they should be threatened? No. When I go to Ballys (pick anyone in the MD area), you will find a bunch of men… Blacks, Indians, Latinos, Whites, Chinese, etc…checking out all of the women…and here is the big thing….women check them out too.
I get a lot of the post, but a lot of them are starting to read like a Steve Harvey Strawberry letter segment…only written by younger men. Women should do this and not do this to get/or keep a man. Women should expect and accept some of the shyt that men do. Fcuk that.
Women just need to read this stuff…take it with a grain of salt, use it for entertainment purposes only, and do them..
If we were playing football I’d put a sticker on your helmet!!!
I have no idea what that means, but I can only assume it is nothing good LOL.
It means you did a very, very good thing like knocking the ish out of somebody.
the AVI……I can’t today, I swear…..bwaahhhhaaaaaa….thanks to you for always keeping me laughing…like Kevin Hart….too funny, and BTW- I concur with the entertainment purposes only…..
@Jai – Women just need to read this stuff…take it with a grain of salt, use it for entertainment purposes only, and do them..
i feel like you just achieved the “glow”
i feel like you just achieved the “glow”
Nice!
The only thing with blogs like this is the fact that you have a lot of women who may approach VSB as the Very Single Bible and apply this stuff to their everyday lives.
Instead of sitting there with a bunch of cats, they will be sitting there with there cats, some duracell friendly toys, and a shotgun waiting for any kneegrow to come along…
COCKED.
“when yu got that glowww”
I know I comment on your avatar daily (trust, I read your comments too) but I’m am thanking white baby Jeebus right now that I don’t have anyone like that in my family.
1) Every man checks out white women. Period.
I agree with someone upthread that said don’t men check out all women and even those convincing shims that could be women
2) Men only deal in emotions to get p*ssy.
I was gonna call BS on this whole point but you saved yourself with the last line— “Sidenote: I’m not saying the emotions aren’t honest, but our ability to tap into them is directly driven by our desire to not experience desert d*ck.”
Because I’ve meet some emotional dudes and I also just refuse to believe y’all have no emotions at all. Otherwise your point #5 would be useless.
3) Women cannot have sex without getting emotionally involved.
I agree with this as a general rule. I know I couldn’t. But I know some who do. Now you could argue the point that they catch feelings and they just are able to control them better than other chicks. But I’d argue this fir dudes as well, moving on…
4) If more men and women would just shut the f*ck up and, well, f*ck, the world would be a happier place.
This right here “You might end up with a few more Bebe’s kids, but you’ll be happier…well, except for the extra kids which bring new arguments.” is enough to make this a terrible point. Add a caveat about protected $ex or just leave it as shut up and I’ll co sign.
5) Men should marry for love; women should marry for stability.
My name is OftenConfused and I approve this message. Seriously I totally agree.
@OftenConfused – so what you’re saying is that two of them sh*ts was doo, one was ehhhh, the other was Illmatic? that’s one hot album every 10 year average?
You only listed 4. #5 was that illmatic. #4 was ehhh #3&2 probable but questionable and #1 was just obvious and an understatement.
“Because I’ve meet some emotional dudes and I also just refuse to believe y’all have no emotions at all.”
Yeah, all dudes have emotions, some just express them more freely than others. You know how you’re a work and you get upset and instead of ackin all uncouth and crying right then and there, you run to the bathroom? That’s how the average ninja is in general.
My mother is a “she gone cry in the car” type woman and I hate her for it. Mostly….because she passed that stonewall (no gay rights) gene on to me and many-a-dude thinks I’m some sort of anomoly as far as women are concerned.
I’m not. I just hate public displays of emotion on all accounts. Thatisall!
lol Yeah, I’m hella emotional. But I am a master of hiding it in appropriate situations until I can let it out. Only those very close to me are able to see the waterworks.
#3…… What one needs to remember and keep in mind regarding #3 is that the woman has to already be feeling some kind of way about dude, already be really smitten by him, possibly even love him prior to sex for this to be true, otherwise its just dyck in a jar, as empty as it sounds. that how it feels also LLS……
I cosign this post!
One little exception…two people should marry for love..women and men…or else it will not work.
That is all.
This is sweet but not so much true. 3. Go after what you want, even at the risk of rejection-what’s so scary about being told ‘no’?
Ugghhhhhj!!! ignore the second sentence
A couple more universal truths:
“You will never change what you tolerate.” -Joel Osteen
“You can easily judge a man’s character by how he treats those who can do nothing for him.” -James D. Miles
“You should save daddy the big piece of chicken.” -Rochelle, EHC
Nice additions. I would ask this question though regarding your second quote. What if a person is a misanthrope (me) and treats everyone badly? Should I buy that rowboat and head for Atlantis? Or should I continue to stockpile more ordnance?
Lots of Bullsh*t
Treats everyone badly? Lots of Bullsh*t, indeed.
You can never have enough ordnance! No Bullsh*t
@Caballeroso,
Co-sign.
Good ones
“You should save daddy the big piece of chicken.” -Rochelle, EHC”
Niiiice.
“You will never change what you tolerate.” -Joel Osteen
I want to go to a BBQ where Joel Osteen is the host. That’s on my bucket list.
Further on #5, the man should be into/love the woman more than she loves him (but not too much more), and the woman should love the man beyond her own personal threshold of being dedicated and making it work. That way, she likes him enough to stick around when things get tough, and he likes her enough not to cheat, or at least, to think long and hard before making the mistake of cheating. That’s the optimal situation.
After reading through what has already been posted thus far, I am seeing things that are unusual. Maybe it’s because it is still early. I see a lot of wisdom and a good understanding of human nature from both sides. Its nice but sad at the same time. If you VSS’s know the things that you are posting to be true(or the norm), why can’t you actually apply that knowledge?
No Bullsh*t
If you VSS’s know the things that you are posting to be true(or the norm), why can’t you actually apply that knowledge
we do, but men take it as us being defensive or too nonchalant (insert some man’s excuse right here) and then they become defensive. It then turns into a cycle of dysfunction. That is where rule #4 needs to come into play LOL.
LMBO your avatars are always getting me in trouble. I may not have a job soon…
As a VSS in a situation (notice I didn’t say “relationship–another post entirely) with a VSB where my nonchalance factor seemed unusually high for someone of his quality…I’m dealing with that defense right thurrrr!
I hate it.
awww…he sensitive and you hurt his ego LOL
Who says we don’t? Keep in mind we are not perfect. We have too many emotions. Men should lead by example and not prey on a women’s emotions.
@SFG,
“We have too many emotions. Men should lead by example and not prey on a women’s emotions.”
That statement leads me to believe that you agree with the biblical teachings that a woman is the weaker vessel. You are saying that you understand your role and desire to be led.(Can I have your digits? lol).
Is the key to a lasting relationship a man managing a womans emotions?
And if your answer is yes, what percentage of men are actually capable of that feat?
No Bullsh*t
I need to ponder this….
Actually yes I am old fashioned in that nature but define “weaker”. I do believe a man should lead. I know my role as a woman and do not believe I should posess “man” traits. However women are the foundation and the “do-ers” so to speak. I’m perfectly okay with bringing home the bacon, cooking it, raising the kids and cleaning the fort but you better know your role as a man and don’t cause added stress or emotions. Basically, you build it, we keep it together while you protect it.
A man cannot manage a woman’s emotions, nor a child, etc. That’s where we come in. My point is a man should be the protector of women, this includes our emotions. Men shouldn’t intentionally hurt women emotionally…that doesn’t make you a man. So all this, women need to follow their own advice…so do you. You can have my number under one condition: less bullsh*t.
Now why would you go and ruin it? I was waiting on my first good laugh of the morning. Some VSS poser was actually gonna agree with a man managing her emotions. She knows she can’t manage them on her own (Virgo’s – shots fired) and would love for a man to do it.
I take back my request of the digits. I want your address now!
No Bullsh*t
Lmao
you roughSandpaperI would give you my address but you would have no way to get to Unicornia land. (shots fired)
lol j/k…use your powers for good and leave poor vss alone. I read your threads, you’re too smart for your own good.
(screams) CBG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ssssshhhh….CBG been gone and Sandpaper been playin on my emotions. *takes out baby wipes for hoe bath*
@SFG…SAY.IT.ISN’T.SO!!!!!!!!!!!!! what, when, how, why??? I was getting set to plan a VSB wedding (I went to the Dollar Store and ery’thang…smh)
I’m a weak woman vessel *snicker*…you killin me with the dolla store comment dwl
If you VSS’s know the things that you are posting to be true(or the norm), why can’t you actually apply that knowledge?
Honestly I usually do, hence I’m single (well divorced) and skeptical. I ended up married due to my belief (err hope) that although these things are the norm that there had to be some unicorns out there and I was lucky enough yo have found one. Of course that was not true. But I’m still hopeful that I’m going to run into that unicorn.
I have a counter question…why do men do the same thing. I mean y’all all say that women are emotional and catch feelings quick. So why do y’all add to their delusions? Why tell the girl you’re feeling her when you’re not? Why use “us” and “future” when call know y’all ain’t trying to keep us around?
“Why tell the girl you’re feeling her when you’re not? Why use “us” and “future” when call know y’all ain’t trying to keep us around?”
That depends. lots of variables. I will list a few.
1. If we haven’t already, we want to sleep with you.
2. He means it wholeheartedly when he says it. At a later date, someone he deems to be better comes along
3. You misrepresented yourself and he finally saw it
No Bullsh*t
“3. You misrepresented yourself and he finally saw it”
#DEAD bait and switch is a regular practice lol
Your answers 1&2 sadden me. Point 3 is understandable.
I think I’m going to learn the likevthe idea of growing old alone. **oftenConfused leaves the blog discouraged**
Let me expand answers one and two to give you some hope.
1. You know lots of less crafty men use blatant lies to get the kitty. As a dirty old man once told me, “you gotta get it from somewhere.”
2. I’m not saying they are just waiting to trade you in. You play a major part in whether or not he will share the wang.
I hope that makes you feel better
No Bullsh*t
wait, why you change yo name?
“If you VSS’s know the things that you are posting to be true(or the norm), why can’t you actually apply that knowledge?”
I think it’s already apparent that we’re a special bunch on here and thus…not real. We’re illusions.
2010′s shelf life is running out. I was gonna go with “IceCold” but 3 stacks already has it. Also thought about “MadeYouThink” but then I wouldn’t have as much fun with my comments.
No Bullsh*t
Adding a universal truth my mother passed along to me from one of her male friends:
men will always do what’s easiest and best for them”
truth.com
Totally agree with #5. My dentist who is a yt man in his 60′s, imparted that piece of knowledge on me while he was checking my teeth for cavities. It was the best $10 co-pay I ever spent.
Totally agree with #5. My dentist who is a yt man in his 60’s, imparted that piece of knowledge on me while he was checking my teeth for cavities. It was the best $10 co-pay I ever spent.
***im more intrigued by the fact that you have a $10 co-pay FMI (fcuk my insurance…)
Jai…ummm….what is that in your avi today? -_- I’m tired of laughing to tears. Is that a man? You are the best. Carry on.
it is a woman who is too damn sexy for her own good….sad part is that she is probably getting my d*ck than all of the VSS’s combined
(she definitely getting more than me…I have to holla at that yung tasty tenda at the olive garden:) )
this is in response to Mellow Yellow (am I the only one who remembers the drink)
Showing my age
@Jai
They just started selling Mellow Yellow again down south. I remember they used to put wrestlers on their cans. A soda + Dusty Rhodes = Excitement!
I was a Rick Flair/Sting fan myself…but I have to concur with your statement!
@Jai
I just had flash backs of watching wrestling on Saturdays with my granddaddy.
@ Wu…I know right! When wrestling was fun and entertaining and you just knew it was ‘real’ (before all of these hard to believe storylines that they have)!
@Jai
to this very day I think all white men who drive Corvettes should have mustaches because of Magnum T.A. and i always want to Russian Sickle coworkers but thats a whole other set of issues.
YO!! Me and my brother were talking about this yesterday. I remember when Ultimate Warrior would come out we would go crAZY!!!! My mother would be asking what was wrong with us, LOL…ahh, good times…
Bond.
@ WU
memories!!!!!!!!!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0PdW-gOJobc
@Jai
That warmed my country-a## heart. “Oh my goodness, somebody check on David Crockett!”
The Road Warriors had the best interviews. “Blah, blah, blah blah. Tell ‘em Hawk.”
Yes, I remember Mellow Yellow’s quite fondly. You’re showing your age and where you’re from, Jai! I remember I could only get Mellow Yellows when I went to SC to visit my fam.
@ Wu…that is why you are my e-buddy! Good times…good times!!!
@Mellow…YESSSSS! I luved mellow yellow and I am from the good ole confederate (pause) state of VA
LOL I love this post today.
I don’t think every man checks out white women. I think men check out beautiful women, Period. If you fall in the beautiful category, men stare. Now if you have 2 women, (let’s say Angelina Jolie and Aishwarya Rai) walking together, would all men stare at the white woman first? I don’t think so…only in the USA could you make that statement. I think Black and Indian women are the most beautiful…and since I’m both, I’ll make that statement. I don’t care what men say.
Yes, Focking over arguing (or both) makes me hot….cause it’s hot. Period. Yes I knocked over your xbox, now make me pay for it. Oooowww.
Men have emotions outside of women. Ya’ll only admit it because of us…but you have them regardless.
No women cannot have sex without emotions. She may start out that way, but it ends up in a bloody tampax mess afterwards…tears and all. There are always exceptions to this rule, but that’s not something to be proud of.
We should all marry for love and stability. I loved my ex and still do very much but the stability was lacking. Hopefully we can all eventually find both. If not, comprimise. I’ll chose love because you can always work on stability. I lost my point. I’ll sum it up in the words of philosopher Katt Williams: “Ninja you betta get up…this is not a drill.” I don’t know how that relates but (i said i lost my point) it’s my current motto for this month.
LOL! This posts sounds like Panama, lol. True though… kudos for knowing who Ash Rai is, she is beyond it. Wayne.
Bond. BlkBond.
AISHA!!!!
she’s absolutely gorgeous.. i do like Kajol too.. but that’s just me..
@BlkBond & Nickerz
she’s dang hot. What you know about Kajol and Dhanak tv? lol
mama, don’t even play.. i got my mommy on indian movies..
Kuch naa, Jodha Akbar, Dhaai Akshar Prem Ke. Kabhi Kushi Kabhie Gham.. alla daT!!
don’t even act like you don’t know!!
and the Dola re Dola in devdas.. CLASSIC!!!!!
my mom doesn’t like it thought.. “is that the crying movie”.. because every five minutes SRK is bawlin.. and mommy can’t stand it!!
BRING IT!!
LOL!!
Daaaaaammmmn Nick. You brought me back. All them days at my daadima’s house (yes girl) watching Dhanak tv and couldn’t change the channel…and you forgot Chiru. lol
Co-sign the sentiments about Aish. Perfection. I want her to sell “essence of Aish” at Macy’s or some ish so I can embody some of that.
lmao it probably smells sweet and spices lol
Aishwarya Rai is too beautiful for words at times. I also love Padma Lakshmi. I’ve always found Indian women beautiful. I remember you saying something about you being shaped like an Indian woman and I now see why you said that. Cool, but I still don’t believe you.
Lol I wanna be shaped like a sista…STACKED. All I have are these damn indian hips. When I look at indian women’s bodies, mines looks just like that. Trust me there’s nothing exciting about it. Just medium from head to toe (except hips). I wanna be like Boom Pap Pow!…and get that “daaayyuuum” stare from brothas.
They may not have the stacked bodies, but Indian women are GAWgeous.
i loooooooove Indian weddings. the colours, sights, smells and sounds.
the adornments, jewels and outfits are just gorgeous.
wonder if i can have an east indian themed wedding with west indian food. hmm.. lol.
@SFG
“Now if you have 2 women, (let’s say Angelina Jolie and Aishwarya Rai) walking together, would all men stare at the white woman first? I don’t think so…only in the USA could you make that statement. I think Black and Indian women are the most beautiful…and since I’m both, I’ll make that statement. I don’t care what men say.”
The day I catch Nia Long, Frieda Pinto, and Charlize Theron walking down the street is the day I catch three charges for kidnapping.
damn that’s a hell of team…frieda is gorgeous and nia is black man queen and charlize got super powers.
Double co-sign on Numbers 3 & 5!!!
Good folks of VSB, do you have any other words of wisdom to share?
1)A woman will give you some @ss before she will give you some money (taken from Humble’s Rules)
2)Convenient p***y is the most dangerous p***y (taken from Humble’s Rules)
3)Don’t go into a relationship half @ss. If you aren’t willing to give your all or you are holding back you don’t need to be in a relationship.
4)A woman should not expect much from men under the age of 27 years old in a serious relationship.
5)The average man will never have the resume of the average woman. So stressing her numbers is useless. As long as she wasn’t Superhead, worked for West Coast Productions, the university mattress, or was on the stroll make her take a test and roll with it.
6) A man/woman will typically show who they are within the first 6 months of dealing with them. Hopefully you have the experience to decipher their behavior or acts when they show it.
3 and 6 is gospel.
But why is convenient punny more dangerous than regular punny?
@SmartFoxGirl
“But why is convenient punny more dangerous than regular punny?”
Because you get comfortable and slip. When the p***y is available whenever and however you want it with no strings attached you open yourself up to unwanted kids and STD’s.
@Humble_One,
There is great truth in all of this.
A man/woman will typically show who they are within the first 6 months of dealing with them
I would say 6 dates or even 6 prolonged phone conversations…the only thing is that you may have a motive for dealing with that person (relationship, da business, bored, etc..) and even though the signs show you that they ain’t shyt, you still deal until you conquer your goal (or get frustrated or they fcuk up). You will look past (ignore), make excuses until you get what you want.
2)Convenient p***y is the most dangerous p***y (taken from Humble’s Rules)
Convenient p***y came into it with some type of feelings…she didn’t just catch feelings, they were already there (the level may be questionable). Maybe she was lying to herself or him, but you can’t drop the drawlz and get some good business w/o catching feelings. Maybe she thought that her ability to do downward facing dog/with the combo of froggystyle fluidly would win him over and she would get a title? Once he leaves her and moves on, she is now d*ckless, suffering from GDD (Good D*ck Deprivation…its a real disorder in the DSM-IV). She can’t work out her stress so now she is bitter, she is angry all the time so she starts losing friends, her life falls about. She tries to mess up his new thing (cutty buddy, girlfriend,etc), she will stalk you, key your car, slash your tires, etc…no good comes out of the convenient one.
@Jai
How did I forget this? This is one of the main reasons I came to the conclusion “Convenient P***y is the most dangerous p***y”.
damn, I guess I never got it that good.
“1)A woman will give you some @ss before she will give you some money (taken from Humble’s Rules)”
I’d love to read this list of rules. Or would you have to kill me? If it’s that’s the case, I’ll pass by the way. I’m trying to live and be great.
The 27 year old rule made me laugh. A lot. Partially because I believe it to an extent, and partially because I’m 26.
How bout some more universal truths:
Doesn’t matter how good you look, how good the chex is, a man/woman who wants to cheat will cheat. (See Halle Berry, Christina Milian, Rihanna, etc.) For men, while cheating can be simply the result of boredom and opportunity (see Elliot Spitzer, entire NBA), its mostly about ego. Some other chick is pumping up their ego, is more in awe of them or making them feel more like a man than their current chick. For women, its the complete opposite. Its about feeling an emotional connection with another man. Don’t get me wrong, some women are just wh*res, plain and simple. But more times than not, another man is doing something for her emotionally than the current one is not.
BEST comment I read so far. Most of the time men cheat because homegirl makes them feel more like a man, for the moment cause if she was better over all: they leave. I don’t believe in the opportunity part cause if he really loved her, he wouldn’t. We are about feelings. Good one BK. *edap*
@thepopculturist (aka BKSweetheart),
Excellent addition.
“Doesn’t matter how good you look, how good the chex is, a man/woman who wants to cheat will cheat. ”
YES! If there is ANY way for reality to smack you in the face, it is the above. Looks don’t got sh*t to do with the price of lukewarm tea in Timbuktu.
It helps, but that ish don’t make a deal.
Men are emotional. They just aren’t apt to show it all the time. But you contradicted yourself in saying men should marry for love. You’re saying that men do have the ability to love truly and sincerely…an emotion. So they’re not all about sex. Not all of them anyway. I like to think I have the toxic element needed to make men fall in love with me and thats why so many of them do. And…bare their emotions. Nobody gets killed but hearts do get broken.
If he marries for love, even if that love wanes, he won’t want to hurt her(physically or emotionally)
If he never loved her, but still marries her, She might catch him with her sister’s legs pinned back.
Get it?
No Bullsh*t
uh toxic means poison right?
which isn’t exactly good, LLS!!!!
Furthermore it really isn’t in our control, who loves us.
Sorry but your choice of words threw me LLS!!!
They say truth is stranger than fiction. Here’s the problem, I don’t know who the f*ck “they” are, but they sure are right. They are wise beyond belief.
I am they and they are me. We are the world.
I hope the kid is yours. Maury.
Actually, this is probably the most sense you’ve made to me in a very very very long time. *thumbs up*
It’s sad but Panda is like a Rubik’s Cube. And I’m the Fresh Prince. I always understand his weird tangents.
You sound like somebody’s grandmama talking bout they grandad… when’s the wedding?
Yeah…the above is Panda and I in 70 years.
Women can soooo have sex without emotions (my best sex ever was like that), and FWB doesn’t have to end with hurt feelings. Just make sure that the fuck-buddy has some flaws you could never ever get past. My last FWB was a sex god, but he stuttered, dressed like crap and had a child – enough for me to never want to get serious with him.
“By the way, Dan Gilbert needs to be paddled with wood of sycamore and titans. And Cleveland….GET OVER IT.”
I have a feeling Lebron didn’t paddle him right. This wouldn’t have happened if he did his job. Butthurt self.
“And by white women, I mean steretoypical ones, like Becky, not the ones at go-gos or look like they only like Black meat. ”
I know that face. Everyone knows that face. Becky Buckwild from Flava of Love comes to mind. It’s funny how her name was Becky, but her face wasn’t um…comfortable to look at.
“2) Men only deal in emotions to get p*ssy.”
First off, “sensitive thugs” is an oxymoron. Sort of like, “Microsoft Works” (uMad?). Second off, yeah you’re basically right. Ya’ll HAVE emotions (don’t tell non-truths, you know you do), but supress them unless it benefits you. Selfish.
“4) If more men and women would just shut the f*ck up and, well, f*ck, the world would be a happier place.”
You’re a regular Ghandi. But with probably better fashion sense? I’m not sure…
“Now of course I think women should marry for love too, just make sure the fool you are falling in love with has a job.”
Words to live by…
“First off, “sensitive thugs” is an oxymoron.”
Co-sign. The must not have these in SC. I know fake, real, and wannabe thugs but I haven’t seen a sensitive one. Myabe they hang out wiht sober Irishmen and Nessy.
The sensitive thug thing was created by some women to excuse their affection for thuggery and drama. And yes he can be found sipping O’douls with sober Irishmen and Nessy while listening to Just Like Daddy.
“The sensitive thug thing was created by some women to excuse their affection for thuggery and drama. ”
This is probably true. I can see that…
Long time reader, 1st time commenter
#4 I agree with that. Things change when people get some of that “act right”. Had a situation with my now ex that everytime she decides she wants to get upset, I knocked that P***y out the park. Barry Bonds. She calmed down, went to sleep, and just repeated the process.
#5 Women marry for stability… lmao!!!!! They are some of the most unstable things in this world. Nuclear reactor meltdown.
I love, love, love your #5! I say this all the time! People don’t wanna believe me – I mean why would they – I’m not married. But from the “succesful” marriages I’ve seen (my parents included) – the husband truly adores his wife. Like face still lights up when she walks into a room type love. Not sayin the wife don’t love him back. Just sayin the husband clearly thinks she’s the best woman in this world. I once read on somebody’s facebook page, their grandmomma was talkin about how much her husband luuved her. And they were like, “granny you wouldn’t have died for grandaddy?” And she said, “of course, but he woulda died for me 3 times.” Exactly.
You screwed up the link to your blog. Should be http://5andapossible.blogspot.com
Awwwww… thanks for the correction! Fast fingers. Lol.
Aw, this exchange gave me hope for world peace.
Recently had this discussion on a date…
I think the man needs to feel that way, for his sake. Marry a woman you adore can put on a pedestal, because that decreases the potential of you doing stuff that will make her cry. I don’t think that means that the woman isn’t in love with him though. GENERALLY, I think women, self included, need to be needed. I need to love me some him, but I need to be needed, feel like I add something, make you better.
Agreed! My momma loves my daddy lots, but my daddy luurvvess my momma. Lol. And she has remarked many times that if she passed away first, he would be at a total loss. For realz.
#3 I shake my head in defeat, but i’m in total agreement WITH SOME EXCEPTIONS. I think the women that are capable of sex without emotion are women that are cheating, therefore you are having your emotional needs met elsewhere.
#5 I agree with that as well, but I part of me doesnt want that to be my fate. I believe that women can eventually grow to love any man. I would just prefer the idea of fireworks and stars (you know the whole Disney sh*t). Unfortunately those don’t pay the bills….so onto to search for a man that loves me more than I love him. ANY TAKERS, I COOK???
If you go for fireworks, all you’re left with in the end is smoke and useless bits of paper.
real talk. i almost made the #5 mistake. and i do love my husband…and my house.
1… umm okay.
2… i’ve always thought this.
3… i don’t unless i already AM emotionally involved. you sleep with a guy first and then discover you’on really like him at all/like he likes you… a few of those can lead to a questionable reputation. jussaying. best to avoid those situations.
4… my life’s motto. lol.
5… i disagree with women marrying for stability. refer to number 3. lol. i do know that the man i marry will absolutely positively have to be head over heels over heart in Love with me. and i him. if not… no marriage shall be occurring. lol.
@Muze
“3… i don’t unless i already AM emotionally involved. you sleep with a guy first and then discover you’on really like him at all/like he likes you… a few of those can lead to a questionable reputation. jussaying. best to avoid those situations.”
I’ve heard women say they prefer to do it this way. They say if they get the sex out the way they can really get to know the person honestly. I have noticed these are the women with a lot of “ex-boyfriends” and male friends than the average woman.
I like the list PJ. Just a few changes that I’ve made below:
1) Every WOman checks out THE MAN IN THE BEAMER, BENZ OR BENTLEY. Period.
2) GOOD WOMen only GIVE UP GOOD p*ssy WHEN MEN’S EMOTIONS ARE SINCERELY EXPRESSED
3) WOmen OF VIRTUE cannot have sex (MULITPLE TIMES) without getting emotionally involved.
4) If more men and women would just shut the f*ck up and, well, f*ck, the world would be a happier place.
NO CHANGES
5) Men should marry for love TO SOMEONE THAT’S IN THEIR LANE. women should marry for stability TO SOMEONE THAT THEY LIKE TO F*CK.
) GOOD WOMen only GIVE UP GOOD p*ssy WHEN MEN’S EMOTIONS ARE SINCERELY EXPRESSED
***does this mean that they give up bad p***y when they dont know how a man genuinely feels
3) WOmen OF VIRTUE cannot have sex (MULITPLE TIMES) without getting emotionally involved.
**what is your definition of ‘women of virtue’
***inquiring minds
yeah that woman of virtue line sounds good, but that statement is FALSE not because she isn’t a good virtuous woman per say LLS but because she has categorized someone as a piece and she could/can sex him repeatedly without getting caught up in serious feelings… yes women can categorize men also….but all of that is empty honey, a very empty way to live
2) Sex is not a sport FOR ME; so if I question my partner’s emotional ties with me, than I will not put my all into the act and will eventually stop it altogether.
3) MY definition of a “woman of virtue” is someone that doesn’t have sex for sport or for manipulation but as a physical manifestation of how close they feel for a person.#the opposite of what Tiger Woods was doing.
When I’m not in a relationship and I’m horny, I use my vib**tor, not my neighbor. It’s safer that way.
When I’m not in a relationship and I’m horny, I use my vib**tor, not my neighbor. It’s safer that way
***(plus less drama)
co-sign (I have stock in Duracell)!
I just go without *orangeshrug*, me no likey insertion of artifical objects but to each their own…..
I’m with Cheekie, I don’t give the peacocks very much attention at all, why, because they think its a given LOL
#3 totally agree with that revision!!
“1) Every WOman checks out THE MAN IN THE BEAMER, BENZ OR BENTLEY. Period.”
I think I’ve subconciously started to hate these cars because of the song.
I hate that song too. But when a brother in a clean, newer, high-end model stops next to me at the red light in one of those cars – I have to look!
2) GOOD WOMen only GIVE UP GOOD p*ssy WHEN MEN’S EMOTIONS ARE SINCERELY EXPRESSED
3) WOmen OF VIRTUE cannot have sex (MULITPLE TIMES) without getting emotionally involved. .
*scratching head*
Yeah I’m going with no. Complete malarkey.
Hmnn…
-I agree women should marry for stability, financial troubles is one of the biggest causes of divorce.
- A woman can have a FWB situation with a man without catching feelings, but only if she leaves before the emotions come into play. Do not prolong these kind of partnerships, lol esp. if he’s not boyfriend material.
-Many women go through a phase when they want to sample an array (small or large) of caramel, chocolate or vanilla “flavors,” usually it’s during this phase that a woman can keep the emotions at bay.
I see a lot of controversy about #3. My thoughts…
1. We may need more clarification of what emotions we are talking about catching. Male or female, you are some kind of special as an adult if you can have chex with someone and not have any feelings, like if they walk out your door, get hit by a bus, that then backs over them to see what that bump was, and you look out the window like..”that’s effed up, f their life…crunch berries or peanut butter, hmmm?” yeah, who does that. So PJ, what emotions we talkin bout?
2. Perhaps there isn’t nearly as great a difference between the genders’ likelihood of catching feelings, as there is who they will bed. perhaps we seem more prone to catch feelings because we generally don’t chex someone that doesn’t meet some criteria that could later allow me to consider them as a mate on some level. while for a man, the encounters can be solely based on physical attraction, and chexual chemistry, more often than the possibility of such for women. Even for the women who are engaging in friendly benefits, you prob aren’t doing it with men who you find completely unattractive, have nothing going on for themselves, no ambition, personality, etc. They prob fall into a category that would make them a potent, but perhaps it works since neither of you wants to be in a relationship. So you get all the benefits of being in a relationship, but you are friendly enough that you know too much about eachother at this point to wanna be together.
I can’t say that #3 is bible, but more times than not, it’s a fact. I have had a relationship before though, where I was with someone, relationship, and once not a relationship, with folks that I respected, admired, great potential, but for whatever reason, they didn’t quite work for me. People that I wouldn’t be ashamed to say I was involved with by any means, all around great, but yeah…no. Just wasn’t there, but the chex…wow, some of the best. Both of them became EXTREMELY emotionally tied up, which in part, was why it ended. (and they were already gettin the biz, so, so much for #2) Was I on some oh-ish, uhh possibly, to someone, but I didn’t see it like that. LIke I said, one was my man, the other, we were exclusively with each other in that way, during that time. He was doing his residency, and my sched was full. Neither had time to be on anything more, but trusted, respected each other. However, at this time in my life, I couldn’t entertain that type of relationship. i need the freedom to let my emotions be tied up in, and released during any chexual involvement. Otherwise, what the point? I’ve had AMAZING chex, emotion is necessary to compete with past experience. That’s just where I am. All that to say, based upon my perception of what’s implied by getting emotional after chex, yeah, we are capable. Just less likely. And you don’t have to be a cold hearted bia, to have a situation like that…then again, when I get married, if my man was to cheat, strong possiblity that I would respond like an emotional man, and dismember some folks. Ok, yeah, perhaps I should be dismissed to the robin corner, hmmm, ionno?
I mean steretoypical ones, like Becky, not the ones at go-gos or look like they only like Black meat. And they’re easily noticeable
what does a 2520 that only likes black meat look like, seriously?
what does a 2520 that only likes black meat look like, seriously?
Kim Kardashian
Kim Kardashian
She is rumored to be dating Cristiano Ronaldo, so she might no longer fit that profile…
She is dating Miles Austin, the receiver from the Dallas Cowboys.
Booo YOW! 2520 that loves the balck meat it IS!
#4 – the key to winning an argument is to make a man think that the idea was his, then agree with him
Woman: (under her breath): We really need to paint the kitchen
Man (trying to make sure he heard her): We need to paint the kitchen?
Woman: Yes, honey, I agree! Why didn’t I think of that? Let’s go to Home Depot, they’re having a sale!
Man: Um…yeah, glad I thought of it.
I’ll agree with all the truths, with a few annotations:
#1. I’ll assume that this one was put up in response to the problem some black women seem to have with black men checking out white women. If that was the intent, carry on. But the fact that #1 singled out white women made me uncomfortable because it seemed to them on a pedestal, which wasn’t necessary. Men check out beautiful women…period
#3. True as a biological generalization, but not so much (as you stated) when it comes to individuals. Also, ALL the women who can f*ck like men DO NOT turn psycho when they fall in love. Simply put, they’re more left-brained – their logic is more dominant in their thinking than their emotions, so they have the ability to sift feelings out of the reality of a situation. I’ve had men become emotionally attached to me after having sex, but I have to remind them that it’s the “pink haze” (that good sh*t)…they have to wait till it lifts before making any rational decisions. Women should do the same….It’s all about conditioning yourself. Generally speaking though, I agree that men should not make a habit of believing women when they say they possess this ability – sure there are exceptions to every rule, but don’t be stupid. Honestly, most women who have this “power” don’t go around telling men they have it, so that should be an indicator right there.
#4. There’s an old saying someone relayed to me when I was younger: “Marry the man that loves you more than you love him”. It’s true, but considering universal truths #1 (with my annotation, of course) , #2, and #4 (since the “Pursuit of Happyness” f*ck doesn’t necessarily have to be with the one you’re seriously involved with) I doubt that it keeps a man at home.
**agrees w/ all these sh*ts**
Nice read!
“**agrees w/ all these sh*ts**”
lmfao
This was probably the best comment of all. ALLTIME.
**sniff** I think you’re the onliest one who read it, but I’m honored just the same! **wipes tears**
lol!
Hey everyone.. I’ve been such a long time lurker, first time commenter… this is such an amazing post, simple and to the damn point. Deep, deep-rooted imperialism, the impossibility of women to separate love from sex, shut up and love (haha) but mostly-
number 5- that, is GOSPEL.
LMAO @ Not that I’m completely against murder, I’m just saying murder the right people, dig?
DEAD @ “Wash, Rinse, Repeat”
Something that my brother and I learned in hi skool: the person that cares the least always has the the most control.
1 and 3 are wrong. The rest are right.