Pop Culture, Race & Politics

So God, Beyonce, and Ray Lewis Walk Into A Bar…

Let’s just get this out of the way upfront…Beyonce killed the half-time show.

Oh yeah, and she can sing. I’m not scared of any of you motherf*ckers. Was it the best half-time show of all time? No. But was it dope? Yes. But we’ll get to her relationship to Jesus and the occult later. Hope I remember.

Anyway, it’s the Monday after the Super Bowl which for the East Coast ended about an hour ago due to a 35 minute power outage. Yes, Beyonce had something to do with that. But again, we’ll get to that later.

Congratulations to the Baltimore Ravens. While I definitely felt myself starting to pull for the 49ers at the start of the game I’m happy for Baltimore and their fans. I do have to question some of the play-calling on the part of Loser Harbaugh on the last drive for San Fran, but I don’t get paid millions to get there and win or lose. Naw, I’m just a squirrel trying to get a nut to move your butt.

On to the next one…and all my single ladies.

I was ready for the Internet to either implode or shut down altogether during Beyonce’s performance but somehow, that didn’t happen.

OH….motherf*king Alicia Keys went and remixed the national anthem…in front of all them nice white people. Not only does she spend 80 percent of every song yelling at all of us, now she’s lighting women on fire, which I’m fairly sure, is like, not cool, bro. But if there’s one song that’s more sacred to white people than “Dixie” it’s the National Anthem. That’s why so many tend to hate it when certain singers sing it…like the Christina Aguilera’s and the coloreds. We tend to flavor it up. Well she flavoried it down with a jazzy version but then hit up a couple extra words and lines in the end. Lawd, Alicia. First you decide to work with BlackBerry, now you f*cking with white people. It’s been an odd week for you.

Back to the lecture at hand. While I like Beyonce, I’m not nearly on the level of her stans out there. I don’t think the Super Bowl was Beyonce concert with a football game surrounding it. But maaaaaaaaan listen, when she hit the crowd with the “raise your hands towards me and let me feed off your energy…” weeeeeeelllllllllllllllll, I ain’t saying she’s drinking the Kool-Aid, but she’s definitely on the verge of Crystal Light. Oh, and she made Kelly and Michelle her backup singers. I like it. I like it a lot.

THEN the power goes out. I’m not a betting man because if I was I’d put my money on the fact that God probably put his chips on Baltimore to cover the spread in Vegas. Why else would he cut the lights AFTER Jacoby Jones records the longest kick-off return in Superbowl History (well until it was noted that it was only 108 yards and thus tied with others). He had to make sure that Baltimore was up enough to ultimately win. Of course, it’s possible that Beyonce’s powers of the unreal cut the lights to somehow give San Fran an edge (it didn’t, they’re a tremendous comeback team and should have won in my opinion), but if the Ravens don’t win then we don’t get Ray Lewis and his Psalms 91 shirt and then we don’t get him telling us about God more times than the entire winner’s circle at the NAACP Image Awards on Friday night who ceremoniously disrespected Jamie Foxx as he sang the gospel while accepting his award which I’m pretty sure was for “Most Versatile Performer” or some such f*ckery. I ain’t saying that the Image Awards ain’t sh*t, but that’s awful close to a BET Award show category.

Oh, and Red Tails winning movie of the year or whatever it won when 1) it sucked more than, well, anything, and 2) it was in the same category as Django Unchained and Beasts of the Southern Wild, and 3) nobody even remembered when it came out was some bullish*t. Even George Lucas said he wasn’t expecting to be up there. Luckily nobody who actually knows sh*t about movies gives that win any credence.

I’m rambling. Yes I am. Back to Ray Ray. I know he’s religious and always has been so its nothing new. But between him, Beyonce, and God shutting off the lights at the Super Dome, well, there was a lot of Jesus going on around the Super Bowl. I would like to ask Beyonce to give some of her followers the ability to worship Jesus too though. Boo yaow.

So yes, I just used almost 755 words to get back to this:

Beyonce can sing.

WHAT?!??!?!

So…did y’all watch the Super Bowl? What did you think of the performance? The Image Awards? Beyonce? Ray Lewis? It’s the morning after…

Beyonce.

-VSB P aka THE ARSONIST aka MR. MONDAY MORNING POP CULTURE aka GIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIRL HE A 3

 

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Damon Young

Panama Jackson is pretty fly for a light guy. He used to ship his frito to Tito in the District, but shipping prices increased so he moved there to save money. When he's not saving humanity with his words or making music with his mouth, you can find him at your mama's mama's house drinking her fine liquors. Most importantly, he believes the children are our future.

  • SororSalsa

    I think I will wait til tomorrow to see the video of Kang Bey’s performance. I’m done with her this week. I was on about 98.75% of Beyonce saturation before the Inaguration and I’m at overflowing now. I’m going to need Bey to take several seats for at least 2 years before I can take her again.

    [ducks to avoid the Bey stan hate about to come my way]

    • AnonyChick

      Thoughts on the performance after catching it on YouTube:

      1. The lights were very extra.
      2. I could barely hear the other girls singing during the DC “reunion.”
      3. Kelly (her thighs, especially) got THICK!
      3. Michelle is skinny.
      4. Wait, did she kick Kelly and Michelle off the stage?!
      5. There’s a lot going on for a half-time performance. This is NOT a concert!
      6. Why did she end with ‘Halo’?

      I’m pretty sure I’m going to get sick of her soon and the year just started. 2013 is about to be the Year of Beyonce…:-/

      • Ms. Bridget

        Why couldn’t they turn up Michelle’s mic? They always do her like that.

      • karmell

        yes, cosign it all! I love B, but I’m on overload. and why did she pick every wrong song? Halo, really? I was confused. and annoyed. Had to cover my baby’s face too many times for this to be a family show.

        • Tyra

          oh plz…all the cheerleaders of the NFL wear wayy less than Beyonce and her girls. Stop, just stop. She’s Black and she and Kelly and Michelle are beautiful! They can go with small clothes – some of those cheerleaders need to wear full jumpsuits though!

      • Deviant

        4. Yes. She dismissed them. Promptly.

    • ChaoticDiva

      +100.

    • Todd

      LOL @ Bey Stans. Is she too good to call and write her fans? Is this the last package they’ll ever send her a$$? :)

    • AfroPetite

      Tickets for her Mrs. Carter Tour are on sale the day after Valentine’s and I am camping out on my laptop to get them. JUDGE. ME.

      • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

        yeah, I might too.

      • Tyra

        same here! i will be THERE!

    • KayC, The Quiet Storm

      I agree with you! I was on Bey overload and I need a break as well. I was so glad when that d_mn halftime show was over….

      But Panama….wasn’t Michelle and Kelly ALWAYS her backup singers?!? Come on now, let’s be honest about that. It was always Bey and ‘them. That’s why the other two were replaced.

      • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

        Kelly and Michelle had plenty of singing parts on Destiny Fulfilled. and Kelly got a lot of burn on Writings on The Wall. But yes, they never shone quite as bright as the Thunder Goat.

        • SororSalsa

          Panama, if Bey is the Thunder Goat, does that make Rhianna the Lightning Goat???

    • Borb

      Too much hate above, Too negative also and stop using the (F)word,it makes you sound ignorant and dis-respectful. If the Ravens would have lost, Ray Lewis would have still gave GOD the glory. P.S. yes ,Beyonce did sound pretty good. God Bless all that are struggling with racists and all other hate issues. Love our neighbors, even our enemies with all your heart, all your mind and all your spirit. WWJD ? Do the same. God Bless you Brother !

    • Borb

      Too much hate above, Too negative also and stop using the (F)word,it makes you sound ignorant and dis-respectful. If the Ravens would have lost, Ray Lewis would have still gave GOD the glory. P.S. yes ,Beyonce did sound pretty good. God Bless all that are struggling with racists and all other hate issues. Love our neighbors, even our enemies with all your heart, all your mind and all your spirit. WWJD ? Do the same. God Bless you Brother !

  • Cheech

    As a Proud Ravens fan, im on one like none other. Gun shots were flying for a minute. Flacco earned it and Beyonce went ham for real. But Michelle bugged me with the whole jelly thing…there was nothing

    • chameleonic

      i literally had a moment where i wanted to uppercut and cut this fool just completely out the group. weaklink behind f*cking up the epicness of anything and everything. why do your thighs look like poolstix AND your voice wont ever project?? smfh. kellys dope though.

      • Royale W. Cheese

        “why do your thighs look like poolstix”
        *
        LOL. Those are the thighs that I actually work for. She looked very fit, IMO.

        • chameleonic

          michelle honestly looks FIT to you? like….honestly??

          • Royale W. Cheese

            My bad. I’ll type this now because I completely failed to mention it before: Those are the thighs that I actually work for. She looked very fit, IMO.

            • Ms. Bridget

              Bwahahahaha!

          • Kema

            Give me Kelly’s legs! She looked nice.

            • Tristan

              ur legs aint too bad already

            • T.Q. Fuego

              Yes Kelly! THAT is who u should be aimin for RWC. Michelle’s thighs are NOT the business.

              • Royale W. Cheese

                Maybe that’s what a six foot tall woman should be aiming for, but if I let my thighs get that big, I would look and feel kind of disgusting.

          • WIP

            Michelle is skinty. We’re ok with this. Choosing to perform Bootylicious does seem unnecessary.

        • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

          hmm…i aint saying she’s not healthy, but she do got some pencils.

      • Tyra

        Wow…really, chameleonic? It’s like you have something against her personally.

    • Eps

      At least you were not down Fed Hill where there are White folks jumping off roofs. Crazy. I saw some youtube videos of it.

      We need to host a Baltimore VSB happy hour. Are there any other Baltimore folks here?

      • kendra

        Hi, Baltimorean here! Ravens Nation! Caw Caw!(retreats back to lurker shell)

      • Lyshebaaaa

        #BMORE #RAVENSNATIONSTANDUP #SUPERBOWLCHAMPS….etc…..Yes, I know this isn’t twitter. Ask me if I care doe.

      • Eps

        Caaaaaaaaawwww!!!

  • Rubi

    I have to say the performance was great, but I feel like she did try to make it a Beyonce concert in 12min, which is a bit much. Like the whole Baby Boy section, I was just like why? In any event, stans ate it up, boys stared at her thighs, and San Fran got a second chance to put up a fight. I think all and all ppl got what they came for. :)

    • Todd

      Those though…

      I’ma need the Jiggaman to get on his Duggars steez STAT if this is the net result. :)

      • Todd

        *Those THIGHS though…

      • Tristan

        them thighs tho….OH LORD *ross voice*

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

      I don’t know how she could not make it a Beyonce show for 12 minutes. I mean, its supposed to be ridiculously over the top. and it was. SCORE.

      • CBRADIO82

        +1… Aren’t “Super Bowl Halftime Show” and “ridiculously over the top” synonymous?

        I loved it.

    • Tyra

      She was great hands down, period. She had the right to make =it the Bey show – she was the halftime headliner, so she could do it however she wanted to. Michael Jackson also did medley’s of some of his songs when he did the SuperBowl and he’s still considered one of the greatest SuperBowl performers ever. Queen Bey did her thang and I was glad to see her bring her girls on stage with her. Best SuperBowl halftime show ever.

  • tgtaggie

    Jay is winning at life right now. And when did Kelly get a body? Kelly and Lotoya Lukett are baddest DC members (IMO). On a serious note why Ray didnt thank the deer antler spray company. Lol

    • Never

      Respect Beyonce, but have been past her awhile. I certainly acknowledge her ability to jiggle a batty jaw and induce eleventy bazillion simultaneous crotch spasms – globally – but…yeah.

      I wanted so badly to see that cheetah in the Sketchers commercial chasing Ray Lewis with antlers attached to his helmet across the Serengeti. I almost willed it into existence. Ray and his bionic triceps.

      Alicia Keys fan. Yerp. Yé is 0-60mph in 4.2 secs yes, but Alicia is 52 mpg.

      I’m quite cool with her remixing the national anthem. Hell, Marvin did it. No – Marvin DID it. For you 90s babies who don’t know any better, do yourself a favor and google “Marvin Gaye National Anthem 1983.”

      Talk about swagga on a hundred thousand trillion…

      • Royale W. Cheese

        “Marvin DID it”
        *
        You are absolutely correct. And I didn’t have to Google it. :) Also, Whitney Huston is a very close second.

        • Todd

          I like Whitney’s better, but Marvin Gaye did his thing. :)

          • DB

            I always thought Whitney’s “performance” of “The Star Spangled Banner” was overrated. Marvin’s version is the best, but Jimi Hendrix at Woodstock comes in at a close second with En Vogue’s doo-wop version at number three.

      • camilleblue

        Yeah….Marvin smashed the anthem – hands down banging performance.

      • Wild Cougar

        Alicia sucked. She did it jazzy because she can’t keep a tune and when she goes off key, like she always does, it will sound like she did it on purpose. She was so off, it was painful. I dont even know why people think she’s pretty. She’s meh but she gets lightskin points and black card cred for trying way too hard to be retro soul.

        • The Guy Formerly Know As Hmmmm

          i agree with everything you said. still, that chick sexy….

        • Delightfully Anachronistic

          LMAO at lightskin points. I have seen her look way better but her hair lays so flat and soccer-momish with it that short, so she loses there. JHud looked great, but her hair also looked weird and you could tell her makeup was too heavy. I think Beyonce had a clause in her contract that required all other singers to be homely.

        • JanuaryBabe

          You are so right……I thought it was just me! Why mess up a perfectly good song!

    • Marshal

      I’m with you on that. LeToya is Always my favorite DC member, then Beyonce then Kelly. Beyonce is NOT God’s gift to modern R&B and her stans are just like Team Breezy- Crazy as fcuk for their idol

      • Tyra

        Beyonce is the modern day, female version of Michael Jackson, the greatest entertainer of all time. Of course she’ll never be as great an entertainer as MJ , but for our time she’s definitely the best. She knows how to sing and put on a good show, unlike so many of these other untalented artists out now that can’t sing and dance without losing their breath before the first stanza is over.

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

      love me some Letoya Luckett

      • SororSalsa

        +100

        Plus, Letoya is on my #1 fave show…Treme. Major points for that. I do think she is the prettiest of the DC staff (yes, I said staff. You know those girls were drawing a check. Farrah only got about 3 months salary.)

  • Nei Jae

    “Oh, and she made Kelly and Michelle her backup singers.”

    This right here is where I got stuck, both here and during the actually performance. It took Key Cole throwing shade on Michelle to snap me out of it.

    That being said, Im not a stan but I love me some Bey. Her performance did not disappoint.

    • Royale W. Cheese

      “Oh, and she made Kelly and Michelle her backup singers.”
      *
      More like pop-up singers. That stage entrance made me chuckle.

      • tgtaggie

        I think Michelle was more glad to get a check. lol

      • Nei Jae

        the pop up didnt surprise me at all. that was a DC3 concert staple.. im also seeing where people are saying that Bey kicked yhem offthtage ( not saying you said it. just to lazy to scroll down and do another reply since i’m posting from my phone)Tis was a Beyonce halftime show, not a Destiny’s CHild halftome show. She didnt have to invite them to perform at all. The smart thing to have done, which KELLY did, was to go out ther all fierce and rock it. Kelly had beaucoup mentions on black twitter last night. michelle’s mentions came mostly in the form of keyshia cole shade defense tweets

    • Todd

      WTF was that about with Keyshia Cole? Is she mad that her window of opportunity slammed shut the second Beyonce walked out for halftime? LOL

      • Delightfully Anachronistic

        She praised Bey (because she learned from Keri Hilson) while giving Michelle a jab about her being a lackluster performer. Didn’t matter, she got raked across the coals by black twitter anyway about being an irrelevant, offkey artist who could never sing at the superbowl because nobody knows who she is and she’s late on her rent payments lol. Cruel. But not unfunny.

        • Tristan

          Keyshia got Jaide’d because of all people to pick on she went after Michelle, just b/c thats the only performer she was sorta kinda more popping than

          • Delightfully Anachronistic

            LMAO at Jaided. And glad I actually know what this is.

          • Delightfully Anachronistic

            I just remember the fact that Keyshia’s record label once got mad at her for not showing up to the studio, missing appointments etc when she had just released a single that did very well after polishing her image up, and should have been capitalizing on her momentum but instead put more effort into her reality show. Kanye was on her team, and she was pretty much set to become pretty well established if she’d made better decisions. Now she’s kind of messy in that Fantasia sort of way to me—alienates fans, doesn’t listen to or have good management, lazy about her career, surrounded by users.

      • Tyra

        sorry, but although i like keshia coles as a person, her singing voice is terrible, awkward and forced, and she has nearly a zero percent chance of ever having the talent and success of beyonce. keshia coles will easily be forgotten by most, while Bey’s music will keep on rockin, even when she’s long gone.

    • Tyra

      agreed. and michelle and kelly are backup singers now only because Bey chose to go solo. By bringing them back for one special performance could only make them her backup singers, with no shade to them.

  • 2cool4school

    I just saw the dutty wine… on national television… in 2013. I’ll leave it up to y’all on which one of those is more surprising.

  • chameleonic

    LOL @ the title of this post. im sorry, i will be a stan. who gives a f*ck. that b*tch is baaaaaaad.

    *

    i didnt watch a second of the superbowl but that youtube halftime show? bananas!!! i was so psysed. when she opened and the smoke and the lights and the….yes. i was so excited to see just how big she went — just for the intro! like, geeeeeeez. for real though, if youre gonna do somethin do it ALL THE WAY big. no half steppin. goes for anybody. what got me about that performance was the scope and magnitude of it.

    *

    that was the first time ive ever had my jaw drop during a performance. literally. it was the first time ive had to jetison out my seat in pure excitement. destinys child reunion? fawesome. this b*tch had a holographic stage shaped like the female version of a hustla. i cant. like. i just cant. she shut that sh*t down. all the way.

    *

    whew! that made me hype lol. but really, i thought it was cool how michelle and kelly came out. that was a really good venue to reunite them and she looks good sharing the spotlight. she looks like a team player, someone who enjoys stepping back like ‘get yo shine girl.’ SO dope. and the shout out to her husband? that was a good look, the inclusion of others. kudos. so many kudos.

    *

    oh! and collar pop to the dmv. ? lol. wheeeew. go athletes.

    • Royale W. Cheese

      “what got me about that performance was the scope and magnitude of it”
      *
      There was scope and magnitude?

      • chameleonic

        >>>>

      • nillalatte

        “There was scope and magnitude?”

        ROTFLMAO… you slay me.

        • chameleonic

          im really not about to get into a claw match over beyonce with some simple b*tches. LOL. didnt you fail to get a job at the second worst location in your company after training at the worst? and youre tryna be a judge of scope and magnitude??? stop.

          *

          this isnt going to be “tear down something great because you dont measure up”. this is going to be…i set the bar for conversation and you attempt to measure up.

          *

          what are the basic elements of a halftime superbowl show?

          • Royale W. Cheese

            Come on Chameleonic, lighten up. It isn’t that serious. It’s just Beyonce.

            • That Ugly Kid

              Did…did you just say it’s JUST Beyonce’?!?! What is…I don’t even….

            • chameleonic

              naaaaaaaaa. b*tch wanna get froggy this is new orleans. lets chop it up. frog legs.

              *

              i WAS lightened up. i was celebrating another woman. i was expressing my excitement over another woman. i was enjoying myself. and i will definitely continue to do so at the expense of someone elses feelings. today im gonna be ratchet as a motherf*cker.

            • nillalatte

              RWC – thanks for responding to her. I debated last night whether to check this chick. Next time. Panama… trust… next time chick comes at me, I won’t hold back. Just, ya know, letting ya know it’s bout to go down and shyt. ;)

              • Ms. Bridget

                Lol @ this VSB beef.

              • Charcoal Burnt Brother Lover

                LMAO!!

                Imma be there to hold your earrings. And make sure to have dem curls tucked in.

                • nillalatte

                  GURL… I’m getting my internet kick boxing training on! What’s dat? Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee. I’m bringing the whole f’n hive with me girl. Gonna be all over dat like white on rice. *jabs*ducks*jabs*flips*kicks in mid air*jabs* Phew… it’s a work out girl! :D

                  • chameleonic

                    lol. youre silly, smh. shout out to all the women that put up with my bullsh*t….and tuk coming through with the sleeper peen. do you know how hard it is to sit the f*ck down?? *sighs* and all the bad b*tches man they want the…they want the…*sighs*

          • Keisha Brown

            Wowsers. That was uncalled for. You on the payroll?

          • That Ugly Kid

            Take a good look, ladies. What we have here is a classic case of TUK Withdrawal. When you go through TUK Withdrawal, you lash out like she just did. Now Lonic, sweetie, I’ll give some more peen…but only if you promise not to touch my PB&J sandwich ever again.

            • chameleonic

              lmao. no tuk! no! [*starts clapping my hands for emphasis*] b*tch got sumfin to say?!?! i gots energy to burn. but….some d*ck does sound good cuz i swear im just backed up and frustrated. i promise i wont touch the jelly, its too much for me, just….give me freedom!!! [*epic wall slide down your chest*]

              • That Ugly Kid

                You’ll only get the peen if you calm down though. No fighting. I can tell you’re frustrated, that’s why I’m here.

                • chameleonic

                  [*clutching your shirt gently as i subtly use it to dot my eyes*] okay, ill calm down. i could use some company. *sniffles*

          • AnonyChick

            Um, calm down, please. It ain’t that serious.

            See, her stans are what sometimes makes it hard to like Beyonce.

            • Wild Cougar

              Someone else liking an artist more than you think they should makes it hard for you to like that artist? I think you should just like who you like, not react to others.

              • AnonyChick

                Um, I never said another person liking B makes me not like her o_O I do, however, think that her sometimes obnoxious fans + the oversaturation of B make her hard to stomach sometimes. Everybody will not worship B, but many of her stans are hellbent on stuffing her down people’s throats and are hella quick to roast anyone who does not like her.

                I do like her, for the most part, but I still don’t think Chameleon’s response was necessary.

                • chameleonic

                  why am i ALWAYS the one getting backlash?? i literally was sitting here enjoying myself and simple mofos tried to be funny and got bodied. its not even the fact you dont like beyonce, its the fact you try to check me for enjoying her. tf outta here. and what gets me most is theyll attempt to roast you yet they wont settle down and come at you with conversation you can actually respect. with actions you actually respect. that lame, loser sh*t = no country for it.

                  • naturalista88

                    You started it though, so… yeah.

                    • chameleonic

                      you are so full of sh*t and you know youre full of sh*t because a moment of glee =/= snide comment. i hate that twisted, lying sh*t. if you have something you wanna say to me than say it. dont come at me sideways, dont make sh*t up, and dont try to instigate someone who does. do not avoid the gauntlet of ‘you wanna talk like the best of em come up here and exist like one.’ your whole set of womanhood consists of lies, jealousy, and hatred. smh. clean yourself up round these parts.

                    • naturalista88

                      “im really not about to get into a claw match over beyonce with some simple b*tches. LOL. didnt you fail to get a job at the second worst location in your company after training at the worst? and youre tryna be a judge of scope and magnitude??? stop.”

                      These are your words, yet I’m full of sh*t. Okay girl. God bless ya.

                    • chameleonic

                      you think these are my claws…..?? lol.

                      *

                      god has already blessed me. this is just showboating and lesson giving.

                  • AmaniKwenu

                    @chameleonic
                    -
                    Why do you take things so personally? It seemed like any unflattering comment made about Beyonce was about Beyonce, not you. Why did you take it as an attack against you? I’m not being funny or mean in asking. I would genuinely like to know.

                    • chameleonic

                      my excitedness offended her so she took a swipe and her swipe got instigated. this is infinitely annoying because even if you put the two of them together, they still could not have an actual conversation about what bothered them so much i expressed my fandom of her. i didnt take it personally so as much as im aware women are like that towards one another in their every day lives: not understanding and stewing in saltiness. it honestly was just an utter nuisance and i felt like being ratchet because im hype and i need to burn energy. they volunteered for that.

            • Tyra

              what do her stans have to do with whether you like beyonce or not? just say you don’t like her stans – beyonce has nothing to do with how people she don’t even know act.

          • Delightfully Anachronistic

            DAMN GINA!

          • Tristan

            and Brick killed a guy….with a Trident

        • Charcoal Burnt Brother Lover

          + a milli to the nth power!!

          hey QUEEN!! :)

          • nillalatte

            AM! Where u been gurl?! *waves excitedly* sorry not been playing much, but life is keeping me busy. :) keep ‘em straight up in hurrr

      • chameleonic

        you see hair and dancing. i see the whole picture. just like when you listen to a song you hear music. i hear layers of sound. you wanna talk elements….? better yet. CAN you?

        • Royale W. Cheese

          Yes I can talk elements, like Earth Wind and Fire. Prince, Stevie, The Beatles, Lauryn Hill, just to name a few have dimensions. Beyonce’s whole picture is not that complex and doesn’t take much analysis to see. Yes, Beyonce is more than hair and dancing. She is also formulaic, rehashed vocal acrobatics.

          • Royale W. Cheese

            Please free my comment.

            • chameleonic

              “free my n*gga b-y. gotta g6 AND a g5 you p*ssy b*tches, you felines…”

              - lil wayne being on one

      • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

        DONT YOU DARE QUESTION BEYONCE. SHE’S GOT SCOPE, MAGNITUDE, CLOROX, DOVE, AND THE HEEBIE JEBBIES…

        • naturalista88

          Don’t forget Fabuloso.

          • Charcoal Burnt Brother Lover

            *hollers*!!

            Clorox, now Fabuloso. iCan’t!

      • Eps

        You just made me spit all my tea onto my keyboard with that one lol

    • Tyra

      chameleonic said it!

  • Malik

    I felt she got a FAR shorter time to do her performance than the people in the past where it felt like they got like a half hour worth of stuff. I mean Prince’s guitar solo back when he did was like 6-7 alone. I know Kerry Washington gave a beautiful acceptance speech because Kerry is the greatest.

    • Todd

      Prince is the King of the Super Bowl Halftime Shows. He nailed it something fierce. Bey did her thing though.

      • YeahSo

        I don’t know how I feel about a man calling something another man did… “fierce”.
        -
        The jury is out for deliberation.

      • GirlSixx

        AGREED.

        BEY did the damn thang AS USUAL. If you ever seen her live but PRINCE Tho??!!! He shut it downnnnn!!!!

    • A Woman’s Eyes

      Prince’s guitar solo gave me LIFE during his halftime performance. Whoo!

    • Delightfully Anachronistic

      I feel like Madonna definitely longer to do whatever it was she did, and she sat down almost the entire time except to hump an armchair and sit on LMFAO’s face. I literally made a sandwich, made a phone call, came back and there was old Madge doing assisted cartwheels and watching a dude walk a tightrope with his d*ck. Bey packed a lot into what felt like at least a minute shorter performance.

      • Winning Yve

        +100

  • Malik

    In more important news, There is (allegedly) a new Kanye album coming out. It’s called Rich Black American. He has Frank Ocean, Pusha T, Beyonce, Florence Wench, 2 Chainz, Big Sean, and SKRILLEX on the album apparently. http://cdnl.complex.com/assets/CHANNEL_IMAGES/MUSIC/2013/02/content/ig8jtv1_lqhha.jpeg

    • Royale W. Cheese

      SKRILLEX ought to make it interesting.

      • Todd

        +1

    • chameleonic

      what?! AND new kanye?! he better rip that sh*t. his last album was saved entirely by clique. and i still want me one of those! [*throws glass vase on the ground*] whats a girl gotta do to get some ham-motherf*ckers?? next week jay z is gonna announce he patents ns-5 parts. *sigh*

    • WIP

      This is good news.

    • Eps

      Kanye’s solo albums are great. His crew album was mehh.

    • Tyra

      cuz you know how important kanye is…

  • Royale W. Cheese

    After watching the half-time show, which was basically more of the same Beyonce-ness, my friend an I concluded that the Single Ladies video was the high point of thunder goat’s career as the back-up-singer-with-a-solo-gig. We also concluded that America has a lack of Michael Jackson’s and Madonnas.
    *
    J-Hud was awesome and she looked great.

    • AnonyChick

      Thunder goat, though?! lol Well, dayum.

    • Royale W. Cheese

      And before anyone accuses me of hating, I’ll explain my perception of Beyonce this way. Every performance feels like she’s standing there shouting at me about what a fantastic artist she is, and I’m having a hard time believing her. In response, she shouts louder and runs back and forth across the stage. I still don’t get it. Then she, her dad, mom, and her management start pelting me with Beyonce merchandise and CD’s and I still don’t get it.

      • Val

        Beyonce is a product, period. That’s why she sells it so hard. She knows that if she ever had to rely on actual talent that she’d be out of business.

        • Royale W. Cheese

          “Beyonce is a product, period.”
          *
          Brief summary of the inevitable counter-argument: But that counts as a talent. Therefore she is talented. Just look at her record sales. I win, hater!

        • Todd

          Not that there’s anything wrong with that. If McDonald’s didn’t exist, someone would have to invent it. Say what you will, but it works for a lot of people. And unlike a lot of pop confections (see Spears, Britney) she can actually sing and dance. :)

        • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

          this ma’am is pure poppycock. the fact that you love Alicia Keys, which must mean you think she can sing and is talented, but find Beyonce to not be makes so little sense to me. I can understand not liking somebody…I dont like Alicia Keys. I feel like she yells too much. And I think she’s a medicore songwriter and her albums leave much to be desired. But I ain’t gonna say she’s not talented. I just don’t care for her particular talents.

          • Risa

            +1000

      • Britico Chick

        as i’ve watched the clip here in the UK, instead of doing some actual work,i agree with you. bey is a great performer; you will get your money’s worth. i will actually go and see her in the 02. why? because i get my money’s worth for a good night up in the rafters because i can’t afford the tickets below close up to the stage. but does she do the same old, same old in terms of dancing and shouting at you about her being a fantatstic performer? yep, i agree. but as she switches it up with a great visual trickery, it feels slightly refreshed

      • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

        sound like a hater. lol.

    • Charcoal Burnt Brother Lover

      *SCREAMS*!! @thunder goat.

      Pray do tell, who or what is a thunder goat?

      • Royale W. Cheese

        Thundergoat is Champ’s nickname for Beyonce. If I recall correctly, it’s based on a scene from one of her videos where her hair is flying all over the place, lights are flashing, and she’s stomping her foot like a goat scraping at the ground.

        • Charcoal Burnt Brother Lover

          *DEAD*!! RWC you are a riot tonite.

          Them stans gon come for your afro. You better weave it up mama! :)

        • chameleonic

          …thats actually pretty funny. too bad for him you used it to be a hater.

    • chameleonic

      no, youre a hater. plain and simple. admit it and come clean and move beyond that suffocating cloud of negativity that keeps you bound at salts’r’ us. salty mofos. just salty. your skin dries out in freshwater cuz you so salty, hater! i have a little container of ketchup here for my hater tots. i have this blue cylinder of seasoning with a white girl on it and an umbrella, because its raining salty mofos anytime her name comes up.

      *

      in all seriousness though, theres a big difference between not liking someone and what theyre about and not being able to understand so you rely on hatred and negativity. its really common to try to be dismissive under the guise of ‘i dont get what the big deals about’ but then you just start to sound like you have a personal vendetta or lack the mental capacity to get it.

      *

      youre not that stupid you just mad bro. cuz all the salt you were gonna use went into beyonces skin moisturizer before that performance.

      *

      skin was just glistening up there! i think she even winked at you as a ‘thanks for watching.’

      • Royale W. Cheese

        Wow. That’s pretty poetic. Lyrical, even. I see a hit single for Beyonce. You should send it in to her. Don’t forget to collect royalties.

        • chameleonic

          actually, beyonce prays to me before going on stage so i get 10% of everything like a GOD. sike….sike. only like a boss, praise his name.

      • Royale W. Cheese

        On second thought, this may already be too similar to some R. Kelly verses, so maybe having Beyonce sing this might be a bad idea. We wouldn’t want to see her caught up in a plagiarism scandal. That’s almost as bad as lip-syn….errr. Yeah.

        • chameleonic

          great! since you brought it up like a predictable b*tch im gonna help you get it. second question: how has beyonce been able to shrug off this one incident that represented her 4,321st performance, 879th accomplishment, and her 22nd appearance at the white house? let me know from your perspective of intelligence and saavy…whilst i count my millions in percentages. =D

          • Royale W. Cheese

            Aaawwwww sheeeeee-id. I just mentioned the incident that shall not be named! lol

            • chameleonic

              youre also avoiding my direct questions, but its cool. beyonce is a celebrity so its not that serious. i just hope you and other women arent that spiteful towards one another in actuality. not a good look.

              • Royale W. Cheese

                I apologize for not answering your question earlier. That was rude of me. Answer: probably with her trapezius, deltoid, and infraspinatus muscles.

                • chameleonic

                  oh okay. so now lets have a real conversation on the elements of a superbowl performance as well as what beyonce has in and of herself that makes her so marketable, because it still seems like you struggle with the perspective of what goes into such things. ?

                  • Royale W. Cheese

                    “so now lets have a real conversation on the elements of a Super Bowl performance…”
                    *
                    Not interested, but thanks for offering.

                    • chameleonic

                      i know you arent and i doubt you could. lol. i could never respect a woman who falters this hard everytime shes confronted with stepping up. that is some loser sh*t. females STAY salty and STAY not putting in the work. smh. lame.

                    • Royale W. Cheese

                      You know, you don’t have to get all mad when someone doesn’t want to play with you.

                    • chameleonic

                      na. im dissapointed, actually. females talk A LOT until you confront them to be on a decent level. its lame. they never step up to the level of the greats and godesses they just stand in place and chase their tails, mad cuz people exist who are better than that. loser sh*t. it actually is almost…thrilling. to know a female can not properly cross such a line. *bats you around for sport and recreation*

                    • Royale W. Cheese

                      These theatrics rival the Beyonce half-time show.

                    • chameleonic

                      did you just….compare me to beyonce….? lol. ill wait for your ACTUAL retort before i respond again.

                    • chameleonic

                      and please make sure your retorts are on par cuz, you tried to steal my gleefulness upthread. pewn! pewn! all day.

          • Shamira

            ’4,321st performance, 879th accomplishment, and her 22nd appearance at the white house?”

            you counted? I hope you have better things to do with your life…lol

            • chameleonic

              and this is coming from someone who researches twerk videos and performs on a broken, dusty couch. im gonna need to point out this might have something to do with your inability to meet the minimum bar of substantial conversation.

              • Shamira

                who’s couch are YOU talking about? because I’ve definitely never let you into my home.

                and i’m sure my man appreciates my research. who’s giving you daps for all those tally marks though? Is Jay-Z thanking you personally? No? Did you get an invite to Blue Ivy’s baby shower? Oh wait…you’re out here e-beefing for someone who doesn’t know you from Adam and then trying to flex on others for calling you out on that mess. I hope you’re at least getting compensated somehow for it. Regardless, it’s pitiful.

                Check yourself please. You are making yourself look so unbelievably stupid right now.

              • Shamira

                Sad part is, I was just making a joke….like I did last time. You STAY doing way too much that you can’t even appreciate some humor. Out here calling other people insubstantial yet you can’t even grasp context clues. GTFOH.

                • chameleonic

                  you tried to be funny and f*cking failed. you tried to talk smack and got roasted. stop tryna back pedal and own up to your bullsh*t. today is the day you pretend youre a classy, self respecting woman for the other 364 days of the year so maybe you feel sh*tted on because you mofos act this silly and oc EVERY GOT DAMN DAY. it is the day after the superbowl and if i wanna get loose on a b*tch then i will get loose on a b*tch because it is my day off.

                  *

                  mofos stay walkin up to you on some dumb stuff, crying cuz you go so hard on them. what were you expecting? ‘lol that joke was awesome even though it was basic b*tch mentality’. okay. youre still comin at me like a basic female.

                  *

                  not one of you has ever come at me in a way i actually respect. lets talk about that and there wont be any need to rotisserie your every comment. hashtag chicken sh*t.

                  • Charcoal Burnt Brother Lover

                    nobody on here has EVER disrespected you-DISAGREE, yes. But if disagreeing is the new disrespect, well dayuuuum *Gucci Mane voice*! I actually enjoy your comments when they are not so trivial, such as this in case! You tend to sometimes take things personally, when folks are just teasing. Ease up girlie. Shid ain’t THAT serious!! You gon bust a nerve going hard in the paint for miss thang. I S.T.A.N.S. for IDRIS ELBA, but I’d be damned to be THIS worked up [not unless you are actually enjoying it] if folks thinks he should quit singing-yes, singing.

                    • chameleonic

                      i didnt say i was disrespected but im not gonna sit here and fake like yall arent some subliminal disrespecting kind of women. my point is that when it comes to interacting with me theres stuff i respect as a woman and theres stuff thats annoying and will eventually get under my skin. and if you wanna consistently approach me in a way i find annoying and not worthy of respect, expect to be treated like those of the ‘this female is a nuisance variety’. when i disagree with a woman whos about her business its just a disagreement and a minimal difference of opinions. dont be a straight loser with a smart mouth you cant back up in e-streets, reality, or delusions. please, just be the sh*t.

                    • Charcoal Burnt Brother Lover

                      ooooooh girrrl, you forgot to add at the end, be the shit, AND the URINE-Kanyeeeezy!

                  • Shamira

                    who cried? not me, cherie. you got me f*cked up.

                    Calling me basic, yet you don’t even know the definition of a roasting. So sad, so petty. Go back to pinning pics of Beyonce to your wall, Claire Danes.

                    FYI: I didn’t fail just because you’re too thick to understand a joke. You refuse to understand what LOL means, that’s on you. I didn’t even shade Beyonce and you have your drawers in a bunch. Who did I even talk smack about? Not you. Repeat after me: IT WAS A JOKE. But continue to tell yourself that you read me. Because, hon, I’ve been literally reading you since you were Alakai Hawaii on SBM, and your cuckoo for cocoa puffs sh*t isn’t impressing anyone but you.

                    I never said I was classy. Take that sh*t to the bank.

                    And for someone who claims to be so above all of us, you keep engaging. So either kick rocks or STFU. It’s simple, really: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FI6gZxLnwdw

                    In the words of the illustrious Cam’ron: “You MAAAAAAAAAAAD”

                    • chameleonic

                      lol, you followed me? um. didnt you just start commenting on THIS blog like….a few weeks ago? so you just followed me silently? you just followed me over a long a*s span of months and didnt say anything? you lurked and watched me? LOL. i have fans and sh*t. LOOOOOOL. that was flattering. you want me to like you? well, rule number one: just be honest. if you have something to say just say it, if you have something you wanna express, express it. dont try to come at me on some half insulting/ half wanting to start a conversation type sh*t. its lame. pick one or the other.

                    • chameleonic

                      so choose, are you insulting me or are you wanting to have a substantial conversation?

                    • Marshal

                      I THOUGHT SO!!!! so this chick is/was Alakai Hawaii!!!!

                      She got banned from SBM for her bi-polar BS rants so she’s been relocated here to VSB…………………

                      W.O.W. :-D

                    • chameleonic

                      that is the worst. i hate that with blogs you get the daily interaction but you also leave an imprint you cant erase. but its even creepier people follow you for months at a time and track you across the internet. like. im not even gonna say anything cuz i dont know if thats creepy or flattering youre as excited as you are about it being me, but i will say you are late as sh*t. it was kind of established my first month or so of being here but lets celebrate your slowness and your blatant decision of taking the ‘im insulting you and it will never be about substantial conversation’ route.
                      *
                      and as far as sbm is concerned, it was just not at all the venue for expelling pent up energy. it wasnt big enough it was like…the most cagey, just, not enough space to run around. it was like being in a corner at all times trying to have an actual conversation with people and i migrated to vsb because everything i told sbm about was embodied by vsb. it felt like a meadow. like….’OMG i JUST told some mofos they need to do this, this, and this in order to be successful!’ which is probaby really insulting to hear everyday…but. i couldnt help it and isht. im mad you guys cant keep your hands off me and try to spin it like IM crazy. marshal youve outright admitted to fantasizing about it yet you get angry as sh*t everytime you address me.
                      *
                      lets look at that bipolar behavior, shall we.

                    • Shamira

                      http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_makl6hMiYm1rxyegto1_r1_500.gif

                      B*tch, you tried it.

                      i’ve been commenting on this blog since 2011. Same as SBM. Been friends with some people on both blog networks since then. Not my problem you don’t know that. Try again, hon.

                      You do not get to decide what is lame. I made what is in your words, a simple a** comment, you ran with it, and now you’re standing here with egg on your face, insisting on continuing to engage. I will gladly oblige you. I’ve made a point of saying what I want to say; you just didn’t appreciate my words. To which I say; who’s boo-hooing now? You can’t even bother to uphold the alleged standards you hold dear. Yet again, you look stupid. Don’t talk about who can insult who and substantial conversations when YOU tried to get trill and got promptly dropped. I’m pretty sure this was a WSHH video last week, and it wasn’t pretty for that chick, either.

                    • chameleonic

                      shamira: here is a lackluster joke that is subliminally an insult.

                      chameleonic: roasts shamira.

                      shamira: =( i was just joking, chill.

                      chameleonic: are you joking or are you insulting me?

                      shamira: now that i think youre calm, ive decided im insulting you.

                      chameleonic: cool. well let me know when youve done something respect worthy that i can acknowledge on MY level.

                    • Shamira

                      I already know that Muze noticed you were Alakaii months ago. This isn’t news to any of us. I was just pointing out a history of absurdity. In case you havent noticed or realized, there is a largely overlapping fan base on both of these sites. Again, you look stupid. And considering that I know several of the SBM writers personally and they’re doing quite well for themselves…I don’t think they’re worrying about failing to take your so-called advice.

                      You can’t claim to want a substantial conversation when you’re out here trying to diss me and failing. I don’t know who you think you’re fooling on this thread, but it sure ain’t me. You can choose to bow out of this convo at anytime if it’s so beneath you.

                    • chameleonic

                      better yet, BOTH of you say something impressive about yourselves when you talk to me.

                    • Shamira

                      chameleonic
                      and this is coming from someone who researches twerk videos and performs on a broken, dusty couch. im gonna need to point out this might have something to do with your inability to meet the minimum bar of substantial conversation.

                      Shamira
                      who’s couch are YOU talking about? because I’ve definitely never let you into my home.
                      and i’m sure my man appreciates my research. who’s giving you daps for all those tally marks though? Is Jay-Z thanking you personally? No? Did you get an invite to Blue Ivy’s baby shower? Oh wait…you’re out here e-beefing for someone who doesn’t know you from Adam and then trying to flex on others for calling you out on that mess. I hope you’re at least getting compensated somehow for it. Regardless, it’s pitiful.

                      YOU roasted ME? Someone, anyone, tell me how that is the case. Your reading comprehension skills are absurd as your delusions.

                    • chameleonic

                      i didnt say they werent doing well. i said i felt stifled and caged because i couldnt help but look over their shoulder and point sh*t out, like…if you just tweaked this ONE thing. which is probably really got d*mn annoying…but i mean. theyre doing their thing. somtimes a girl just wants some pushback. like. impress the f*ck out of me so i can sit down. do you know how ridiculous it is….*holds the bridge of my nose* PLEASE make me sit down. smfh. i honestly can not burn my energy off and the sh*t is just ridiculous. just push back on some impressive isht. thats all i wanted.

                    • Shamira

                      If it’s not impressive to you, then don’t engage. Yet you still keep coming back for more….

                      http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lyydwshr5q1qjtwvuo1_500.gif

                    • chameleonic

                      shamira, you were roasted because that sh*t was true. it isnt a big deal. im happy youre hangin in there i just wish you and other people could do this on MY level. thats all.

                    • chameleonic

                      i keep coming back because its the only way to drain my energy; otherwise, i would sit here and feel wild as sh*t. just because you arent impressing me doesnt mean i wont use you to release myself.

                    • Shamira

                      For something to be a roast, it has to be embarrassing, or else it’s not insulting. Do you not get that? I am not embarrassed about looking at twerk videos. If you’d like to look at the rest of the search history on my computer, I also look at p*rn, watch trashy reality TV, and a bunch of other unseemly behaviors. That. Is. Not. A. Roast.

                      And if you have so much energy to spend, then take a sedative. Solves everyone’s problem.

                      Maybe you roasted some chicken today, honey, but you definitely didn’t get me.

                      On that note, my basic behind is gonna go back to being a productive member of society. I don’t know how someone who claims to be on your level has so much free time to be engaging a plebe such as myself, but continue patting yourself on the back.

                    • Marshal

                      @Chameleonic- I honestly wasn’t 100% sure you Were the same crazy ass chick. I don’t “follow” nor “stalk” anybody, and LOGICAL, SMART folk know the saying about People who ASSume………. Caged??? There are plenty of people on SBM that still get out of pocket over there; Mena and Adonis are justa few with strong opinions. YOU on the other hand was all over the place. You’re a combination of The Joker and a person who smoked the Wrong Reefer and got brain smanged.

                      Keep trying to play Victim and Deflecting Accountability,just like that 25 year old chick who antagonized that RTA bus driver and almost had her head knocked the hell off along with her ponytail and the latest WSHH celeb, Jade the Weak, Dumbass Bully

                    • chameleonic

                      actually, everyone here is pretty absorbant. its like exploding but people absorb the outbursts so its soothing. and plus the guys are kind of…bigger than me. but…im gonna go NOT be productive and wonder about…like. i dont understand how i never feel satiated by anyone. i always feel…like i need deeper stuff. people who make me feel them deeply so i can absorb them too. maybe i should be dominated and not approached with insults as substitutes. a girl can dream.

                    • chameleonic

                      lol @ that legit hurting my feelings. im not a bully.

                    • mena

                      @Marshal: I’ve never been on SBM. I only comment on VSB and TIYC. Wrong person dude. Don’t put a black cloud over my name with lies.

                    • Marshal

                      @Mena- I apologize for naming SBM over TIYC. I hope you know what I meant by refrencing you, and I never said that you were delusional or insane. Chameleonic has been a hypocrite for the longest, taking things the wrong way and then within a blink of an eye flip out with the viciousness, only to then flop AGAN and claim she’s being targeted and harassed. When I’m wrong I admit I am wrong and I move on. She Clearly doesn’t and it’s pathetic and dragged on for too long

                    • mena

                      @Marshal: we’re good. I felt like Marlo from the wire for a second. :-)

    • WIP

      Now how you gonna call Beyonce out for screaming? J-Hud is the queen of yell-singing at folks.
      *
      I think Bey was “turnt up” thus the slight amplification and plus the lip-syncing “scandal”. (although it did look like she was lip-syncing Halo- perfectly acceptable).

    • Tyra

      What’s with holding up Madonna? Madonna is an old white lady who did everything she could to copy Black women artists – Janet Jackson called her out on that a while back. She’s been biting off of Black styles forever, and not very well at that.

      She’s had a few decent songs, but overall Madonna’s talented died with the 80s and early 90s. Her new stuff is another case of biting off Black girls (and again, doing it terribly).

      Beyonce has more talent in her little finger than Madonna could ever have. And I won’t even talk about those rickety stiff moves Madonna did during the Superbowl. I was afraid she was going to break her back or catch a heart attack.