Dating, Relationships, & Sex, Lists, Theory & Essay

Signs That Guys Look For To Know That A Woman Is Interested

start-dating-signs-compatible-ugly-flirting-ecards-someecardsWhen it comes to approaching women there are three types of guys.

1. The guy who will never approach a woman and will likely only ever meet a woman at an Everest College Alumni Mixer or Home Depot After Dark Game Night where the convos are controlled and he’s got a better than 75 percent chance of you at least saying something back to his, “hey…so what brings you here?” He is also most likely to marry the sh*t out of the woman that he eventually dates because he is NOT going through the agony of meeting anybody else. That sh*t is for the angry birds.

2. The guy who will approach your mother in front of you. He is likely the guy most women don’t want because well, he’s going to holler until he succeeds. Basically, its not you he’s after, well not “you”. He sees, he wants, he attempts. These guys are can eventually get hemmed up into a relationship, but its on his terms solely.

3. The guy who is waiting for as many signs as possible that he should ask for the number. Unless he sees a woman he just can’t NOT holler at because he is so taken aback. Think Jason from Jason’s Lyric. True story: I actually ran the lines from that movie about wanting to see a woman again (“If you go to church, I want to be in the back pew…”); that sh*t worked. It helped that I meant it. Anyway, I think most guys fall into this third camp.

Let’s talk about this last group. Why? I’ll tell you why. Recently I had a conversation with some friends of mine about why I never hollered at a woman I had an interest in. Me, Panama Jackson, was waiting to get my Ace of Base on. But I never saw the sign. Now, their argument to me was that, dude, she speaks to you, she’s not outwardly rebuffing your convo…go in for it.

Now, as stupid as this sounds, I will own the fact that this particular woman had me shook. I don’t know why or how it happened, but I was not about to stick a quarter in my a** in this situation. I feel like half of everybody will get that reference and the other half is SO confused right now.

But this got me to thinking of signs that most guys actually look for to know that women are interested. Not that batting eyes sh*t. But actual signs. Now before I list some, this does not absolve guys from not hollering at women. If you are interested, it is imperative that as a dude you leap out there on faith and take a chance. Women seem to know how hard it is to holler at women even though they feel like you should get over it. At the end of the day, it has to happen in order to preserve the species right? The Internet has become a great equalizer in all of this because you can reach out to damn near anybody via social networking and as long as she knows who you are and you have a few friends in common there’s a chance she won’t yell STALKER from jump. But that’s neither here nor there.

So here are what we’re looking for.

1. Smile

I KNOW I KNOW I KNOW I KNOW. Women hate it when men tell you to smile. So I’m not telling you to smile. In fact, get your sourpuss on, sista. Look like you eat trees to your hearts content. I’m just telling you that from where I’m sitting, if I see you and you see me and you don’t smile in my general direction like EVER, there is no way in Hell I’m going to test those waters out. If you smile at me, you’ve upped the likelihood I’m coming your way by at least 63 percent. Granted, I get why women ain’t smiling all day. Hell I’m not. And you don’t want to invite in Jerome from Martin. It’s a tricky dance. Ladies, I get it. I’ve seen some TERRIBLE situations occur. Hey, we’re all just trying to make it.

2. Some type of…bait

Sometime ago, via IG, a young lady I was curious about laid out THE perfect bait for me. I flubbed it. Totally flubbed it. In fact, I fumbled so hard that when I told my homegirl about t she punched me in the arm. She was like, dude, how the hell did you mess THAT up?!? I don’t know, dog. I don’t know. Well I know why but still…point is, she put the ball in my court in such a way that all I needed was a layup to win the game. On a 6 foot hoop. And I wish I could tell you what it was…but I can’t. And I know that’s f*cked up.

Oh, I can tell you this one tho! This happened via Twitter: I was on there talking about as a Gemini how much I love Aquarians (we’re supposed to be a great match and what not…its proven true thus far) and a young lady hit me with the: “I’m an Aquarius…wanna test that theory?”

Bait.

Remember these are things we’re looking for…like our optimal situations.

3. Active responses

Have you ever had a conversation with somebody and it just stops. Like the other person doesn’t get the concept of a dialogue? Yeah, those let me know that its a no go (obviously this is when somehow, we’ve started speaking). But, every so often you get somebody who lets you know, that you may continue the convo by the social cues they give you. Here’s how I met a woman one time. I was at a bar eating some food and she saw it and wanted to know what it was. Simple friendly question swag gangsta clique. Well, I told her and made some joke about the food. Well, she immediately fired back with one of her own. We zinged. We then talked for an hour and a half after that.

Those are three things that I can tell you most guys look for when attempting to discern if they should try to exchange info and progress a situation. Granted, as a guy, you do have to take a chance most of the time. You will win some. You will lose some. But you live to try again. But hey, we all (men and women) want as much positive info as possible when determining if we’re going to deal with somebody right? Bong bong.

So fellas, what are other signs you look for? And ladies, what signs do you think you give off that should let a dude know that you’re interested?

-VSB P aka MR. HELLO IS IT ME YOU’RE LOOKING FOR  aka GIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIRL HE A 3

Damon Young

Panama Jackson is pretty fly for a light guy. When he's not saving humanity with his words or making music with his mouth, you can find him at your mama's mama's house drinking her fine liquors. He believes the children are our future and is waiting to find out if he is the 2nd most interesting man in the world.

  • http://trulytafakari.com/ dtafakari

    I had met him a week prior on campus and thought he was cute and smart. We started following each other on Facebook, so I sent him a message with my phone number in it and said, “Call me? :)” He did. I figured it was a pretty obvious sign…I’m glad my husband caught on to it. lol.

    • Joanna

      That’s so sweet!

    • http://www.twitter.com/IluminatiNYC Todd

      Not obvious enough for my tastes. :)

      • Sahel

        Yeah,i expected that she would write the dude some weird black panthers erotica and slip it under the door with her name and area of operations…with the caption,join up with me if you want to be free

        • http://www.twitter.com/IluminatiNYC Todd

          Hey, I’ve mentioned my preferred approach method. It’s just a bit too bold for the VSSs. LOL

          • Sahel

            I bet two VSSs here would approach you in you’re preferred way..they seem the live wires

            • Yoles

              I’m dying to know which two in your opinion of course

          • ratchet d-Ibaka

            What is your preferred style? Offer you a BJ before knowing their name? Now that’s what I call bold.

            • http://www.twitter.com/IluminatiNYC Todd

              Well, I’d like to know their name first, THEN get offered a BJ. :)

        • http://trulytafakari.com/ dtafakari

          You ain’t slick, Sahel. Lol

      • http://trulytafakari.com/ dtafakari

        Todd, we all know your sign is a waving of white pannydrawls. lol

        • http://www.twitter.com/IluminatiNYC Todd

          Preferably boyshorts please. :-) Oh and she needs to share her knowledge quickly thanks. ;-)

    • http://stanoffewwords.wordpress.com/ Tristan

      Sounds like this girl I met, she found my Facebook, slid the number, I got the message….. 2 months after the fact

      • John Shannon

        Dang Man (in my Chris Tucker voice)

      • panamajackson

        Facebook is very hit or miss. I don’t log in that frequently so i’ve definitely missed important messages and what not. D’oh well.

        • http://trulytafakari.com/ dtafakari

          That happened back in 2006; I’d been on Facebook maybe a year then and I LIVED on it, especially since it was still college kids only back then. I wasn’t missing no messages, no chances to flirt lol

        • hanbonanza

          I’m almost never on Facebook and that worked out for me the worst when I found this message about a year after a brief but deep relationship ended abruptly and (to me) inexplicably.

          The message was along the lines of ‘I feel sorry for girls like you, who need to go around trying to steal other peoples men, you scandalous heaux’ apparently from a disgusted friend of the (other) aggrieved party. I was like ooooooohh, explains ALOT. I had mostly gotten over it by that point so seeing it earlier would have evoked much keener emotions but OBVIOUSLY would have saved me a lot of heartache lol.

          But I second PJ’s ‘D’oh well’ – I gain more by not being immersed in that time and joy sucking vortex lol

    • Andre

      I wish more women were this direct. It’s like if I’m not getting the signal from air traffic control that it’s safe to land then I’m completely missing all signals.

      • http://trulytafakari.com/ dtafakari

        It’s funny you say that, because it’s probably the boldest thing I’ve ever done when it comes to men. I was shy unless the guy worked some magic and got me to open up and be myself. Keyboard courage is easier for me than face-to-face slipping folk numbers lol

        • afronica

          It’s funny you say that because when I read your comment, the first word that came to mind was “Bold!” Clearly, you had received signs that your overture would be well received. But I was still like she’s a bold li’l thing! lol

    • panamajackson

      LOL. Yeah…a man can’t miss that one. Or shouldn’t…

    • SuperStrings

      The modern equivalent of the 3rd grade “wanna go with me? Check YES or NO” note. We should all revert back to the simple days.

      • Lea Thrace

        Yessir. This back and forth ambiguous stuff is for the birds. Simplicity is key!

        • SuperStrings

          I’m down to start a movement if you are. You know everything has to be a movement.

          • Lea Thrace

            Let’s get some tshirts made. I’m not a big tshirt wearer but I’ll rock a wristband. Let me know when the meetings are.

            • SuperStrings

              The first meeting is this Saturday at Loca Luna at 8pm. All of the Atlanta VSB’s/VSS’s will be there. ;-)

              • http://trulytafakari.com/ dtafakari

                is it this Saturday already!? Ugh, I need to get mah life together.

              • http://www.youtube.com/user/pervertedalchemist1 Perverted Alchemist

                I would go, but the traffic there has me wanting to change my mind. And then I have to come in from East Point and College Park? Yikes!!!!

        • SuperStrings

          I’m down to start a movement if you are. You know everything has to be a movement these days.

    • lauryn

      That worked for me 10 years ago. Been divorced three years though. lol.

  • nillalatte

    I light a fire and send smoke signals. You seen it yet? :P

    • Guest

      a;sldkfj

    • Medium Meech

      maybe

    • panamajackson

      I’m more open to carrier pigeons.

  • Joel

    I’ll admit that I’m either terrible at catching the signs or maybe I’m just very good at cutting ties once I feel a woman’s NOT interested. And it doesn’t take much for me to think someone’s not interested.

    However, I know for a fact I’ve made this same argument (about needing as much information as possible before making a move on a potential) both on sites like this one and in real life….and folks love giving me the side-eye every time I do so. I don’t see the problem with making informed decisions when it comes to women. Then again, most of my friends (both male and female) fall into varying degrees of that second category and I’m a healthy mix of #1 and #3.

  • http://vagabondaesthetics.tumblr.com/ Ricky

    It’s not that I don’t notice subtle hints, there’s just a voice inside my head that’s like “naw n*gga chill” and I’m like “thanks voice in my head for saving me from embarrassing myself and creating an awkward situation.” The only sign I recognize currently is that she has to stare at me for 10 consecutive seconds. Then after I verify my face isn’t doing something weird I convince myself up to 70% that she might be interested in me.

    • Msdebbs

      10 seconds?? Your over thinking it…..just my opinion.

      • http://vagabondaesthetics.tumblr.com/ Ricky

        I absolutely am over-thinking it.

      • panamajackson

        Right. 10 seconds is a long time.

        • afronica

          I’ve seen the hold his gaze for 3 – 5 seconds advice but a 10 count? I couldn’t do that. Correction: I did that once, and it didn’t work.

          • http://missrosen.wordpress.com/ esa

            there’s a “scientific” meme that says, if an animal stares for longer than 6 seconds it’s an act of aggression indicating a desire to either fukk or kill the object of its attention.

            • afronica

              Funny because one of those two was definitely my intention. lol

    • WIP

      LOL

    • Rachmo

      If someone was staring at me for 10 seconds I would be so creeped out.

      • http://www.youtube.com/user/pervertedalchemist1 Perverted Alchemist

        *cues “Watching You” by Slave*

        • Rachmo

          I was thinking more “Crash” by DMB but that will work

      • http://vagabondaesthetics.tumblr.com/ Ricky

        Eh. People stare at me a lot. Not necessarily for 10 straight seconds, but long enough.

        • Rachmo

          People stare at me (I have huge hair) but not like in my eyes for ten seconds. I’d think they wanted to wear me a la Silence of the Lambs

          • http://vagabondaesthetics.tumblr.com/ Ricky

            I get that when older men roll up on me like “How’s your day going champ? ;)”

          • Jay

            Huge hair may be my biggest weakness. That being said **Buffalo Bill voice** It shows off it’s huge hair in it’s gif or it gets the hose again… http://movieboozer.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/07/buffbill.jpg

            • hanbonanza

              *Sidles up* Huge hair you say :D. Chiselled cheekbones and a strong profile may well be mine!

        • h.h.h.

          People stare at me a lot.

          because they want your autograph, Skateboard P. lol

      • panamajackson

        I’d be evern more creeped out if she started singing Lionel Richie’s “Hello” possibly the creepiest song of all time.

        • Rachmo

          I was on the phone and had to hold it together reading this comment. Now I want to do this to someone.

          • Lea Thrace

            I have decided I am going to do this at least once this week. I think the eventual harassment arrest will be definitely worth it.

        • Jay

          Genuinely lol’ing

        • Angel Baby

          Hilarious and TRUE!!!

        • ratchet d-Ibaka

          I’m literally on the floor crying!! Thanks for this!

        • nillalatte

          LOL.. material for my next prank! Thanks PJ! :D

  • Abu Husain

    I look for eye contact. If I notice someone keeps looking my way, then I know I’m good to go. Also, if a woman goes out of her way to ask me a random question.

    Even when I don’t notice any obvious signs I still approach. If a man does that enough any traces of anxiety he had will soon be gone.

  • Pillows McGee

    well that sucks for me :( cuz i might see a guy i want to approach me but im so d^mn shy and awkward that EVERY SINGLE TIME!! if its a man im attracted or not actually, if we catch eyes, i immediately put my head back down, which brings me to another way i know im killing my chances, i walk with my head down. aLLL the time :( i guess i secretly hope for some magic energy to float through the air so he knows lol but that has NEVER worked. idk what i can do but smiling seems so ..forward to me idk guess thats why im alone

    • Sahel

      You could take the risk and step up. But then again in all my years the one thing i have noticed is that rejection really upsets women

      • Jay

        Rejection sucks. It sucks as much for men as it does for women. Men are more motivated to deal with it and women usually don’t have to deal with it because… vaginas. No pain no gain, rejection is to dating success what soreness is to working out. It’s gonna happen, it’s gonna suck, deal with it if you ever want to see any results. It’s inevitable, embrace it and it will suck less with time.

        • Sahel

          It seems to suck more for women in my opinion. They seem to think men can’t say no. Men start dealing with no at around 12 or 13.

          • Kema

            Hah! Around that age I was already approaching via folded note. “I noticed you noticing me; so, I just want to put you on notice that I noticed you too” Yea I may have written that note a couple of times.

            • http://trulytafakari.com/ dtafakari

              lol. I slipped a note into a crush’s locker at my job once. Dude never even acknowledged he got it. LOL. Poor little teenage me was SOOOO crushed!

              • http://batman-news.com MicTheMessenger

                Once upon a time in like 1st grade, i had a first crush. we were the two smartest kids in the class. me being the shy but highly intelligent be-spectacled creative that i was, i decided to write a love note, and make it into a puzzle so she had to guess who it was. I made a paper necklace and EVERYTHING. Man…she read it. I watched from a few desks away. All i heard was a cringe worthy “eeeewwwww” in three part harmony from her and her homegirls. that was all i needed to know not to jump out the window EVER again, unless i had a parachute and a planet sized pillow to land on.
                i don’t think i was right again til college. Then i may/may not have been somewhat of a male whore for the entirety of undergrad.

            • Sahel

              But you are a special case study. Look at that bold avi

          • afronica

            We’re actually told, repeatedly, that men can’t say no. If offered chex on a platter, men take it. That’s what we’ve been told.

            • Sahel

              By who

              • LMNOP

                Everybody

                • Sahel

                  Women should just man up and start stepping up to men. This complexities would end and world peace would be in our reach

                  • ratchet d-Ibaka

                    If I step up to you, be ready to have a casualty.

                  • Yoles

                    caveat being… ONLY women you find attractive… but what about the rest of the 95% of the female population.. now bombarding you with advances, licked lips, not so casual press of her chest against your back, grabbing your phone and putting her number in it etc…. what about them????

            • http://trulytafakari.com/ dtafakari

              true.

        • Asiyah

          I can’t embrace it. I thought I would be used to rejection by now but it seems to be something I can’t get used to and that I can’t embrace. Not too confident to not take it extremely personal.

          • Sahel

            EQUALITY lmao

            • http://missrosen.wordpress.com/ esa

              the idea of equality is designed to stratify. beware.

              • Jay

                Esa, you’re a walking fortune cookie. Only more apt.

              • Epsilonicus

                Disagree.

                The issue is that people equate equality with treating folks the exact same. That is wrong. However I get how people come to it because the human brain strives to create patterns out of the word around it.

                • http://missrosen.wordpress.com/ esa

                  i wasnt suggesting people equate equality with treating folks the exact same. i am taking issue with the very idea of equality: it’s a qualifying principle for any capitalist enterprise. people are not units to be weighed and measured. people simply are. if we respect beingness, there’s no need to qualify beingness with the ideology that equality introduces (the implication of stratification that must be equalized).

                  that said, this is purely a philosophical endeavour. i recognize fully that legally, people are not accorded the same rights, and in that way, the legal system needs to be overhauled to reduce the aspects of disparity it constantly introduces and reintroduces into the culture.

            • Asiyah

              with respect to…?

          • basilblues

            agreed. it never gets easier

      • http://www.youtube.com/user/pervertedalchemist1 Perverted Alchemist

        So true. I rejected three women in 2004 (for very legitimate reasons, might I add) and they are STILL mad at me a decade later- a whole entire decade later!!!!!

        • panamajackson

          I once sexually rejected a woman. That did not go well. Like straight told her it wasn’t going down. She, to this day, still reminds me of that.

          • b sweet

            Why did you sexually reject her?

            • panamajackson

              To be fair…this was in 2003. And I was so head over heels for her that I thought she only wanted me for smashingtons. And my feelings were hurt. Basically, I turned into the woman in the situation. So she was like…hey, let’s smash and I told her she hadn’t earned it. lol.

              • afronica

                *mind blown*

              • 321mena123

                If Drake were around, would you have put on his album to ease the pain? Or did you listen to some 112?

                • panamajackson

                  I’m sure I would have.

              • PhlyyPhree

                I always wondered about this. I basically set it OUT for this guy I was seeing and he turned me down. I was SO hurt. Especially because we’d already engaged on previous occasions. I seriously thought something was wrong with me for about a whole week!

              • ratchet d-Ibaka

                You basically draked on her!

              • hanbonanza

                Yea, that ish is super confusing for the conventionally schooled woman

          • http://www.youtube.com/user/pervertedalchemist1 Perverted Alchemist

            I did that too- again, for legitimate reasons. When I bailed on her, you would have thought I called her and her mother a b*tch or something, LOL!

          • SuperStrings

            Women don’t take kindly to the sexual rejection. You’re prone to get yelled at, cursed at, called gay, the whole nine.

            • Medium Meech

              I don’t like the idea of women being rejected either because of how I was raised. I know it’s stupid, but every time I want to say no for whatever perfectly acceptable reason I think of my grandma telling me “Clean your plate, do you know how many starving children in Africa would kill for the food you’re throwing away?” So I naturally think “do you know how many dehydrated ninjas ordering anatomically correct full body Anime pillows from questionable websites where they can’t even read the language would kill for this tall glass of tang you’re turning down?” Granny is always right.

              • afronica

                *cackles* Tang! *cackles again*

              • SuperStrings

                Touche. Old school wisdom and sticking to the basics. lol

              • b sweet

                Lol. I unapologetically side eye the person who can’t say no-I need to know you want to just like you need to know I want to. I’ve actually tried to save the starving children in Africa by cleaning my plate, and they are still starving, so I think you’re good-no worries about exacerbating world hunger.
                Think of it as passing on hor d-oeuvres at a cocktail party. You don’t take everything offered on that silver platter, and by not taking it you save the asparagus puree for the person who actually wants it, and you keep your small plate free for the thai chili shrimp you actually want. Everyone wins.

                • Medium Meech

                  Well everybody wants cupcakes, or at the very least to lick the icing, so the question of desire is moot when you’re involved Ms. Sweet.

                  • b sweet

                    That’s true, but my cupcakes are special, made to order so that you can fully appreciate a delicious, exquisitely crafted dessert. So when I make
                    you cupcakes Meech, don’t stop at licking the frosting you can devour the whole
                    thing, because they were made just for you.

                    • Medium Meech

                      Without hesitation.

              • dmcmillian72

                This comment right here…? MADE MY DAY!!! Lol! Hilarious! This, and the breakdown above regarding how your brain processes “hints” from women. Thank you, @disqus_mQ573pD79j:disqus!

            • http://missrosen.wordpress.com/ esa

              people will show their true colors when they dont get their way. it’s like they want to make it crystal clear that you know you did the right thing by turning them down.

            • http://www.twitter.com/IluminatiNYC Todd

              Had the same thing happen to me. It’s like their ego was dependent on that “easy” win, and they can’t hang.

            • http://batman-news.com MicTheMessenger

              See, that’s a lot of pressure. Why for come i gotta be gay cuz i don’t wanna tie my soul to yours? you might be CRAZY.

          • Kenan

            lmfao Incredible comment

        • ratchet d-Ibaka

          Oh mi gosh! Like DUH. Do you expect me to be cordial and do kumbaya dances?? C’mon!

          • http://www.youtube.com/user/pervertedalchemist1 Perverted Alchemist

            Once again, it was done for legitimate reasons.

            • ratchet d-Ibaka

              Legitimate or not. I’ll be mad forever.

      • basilblues

        I’d say what’s more upsetting me to than an initial rejection is disappearing acts. if you’ve been talking with a guy and think things are going well, then all of a sudden you don’t see him around anymore and the calls/texts/emails stop, then that is much worse. ’cause then you’re left wondering..what happened? did i do something wrong? as opposed to being rejected on a first approach where nothing’s been invested yet…even though i’m not out here approaching guys either lol so yeah..it’s upsetting all around.

        • LeeLee

          I agree. If I have to be rejected, do it up front.

    • Jay

      The whole “make eye contact and smile” thing… I’ve almost ONLY ever seen white girls do this. It’s not a tool usually found in the flirting toolbox of black girls. In my experience that is….

      • Sahel

        Hmm,toolbox

      • http://www.twitter.com/IluminatiNYC Todd

        Eh, you’re 80% right. Show me a Black girl who grew up around White girls, and they’ll pull out the same trick. Maybe it’s something they teach in those secret White people meetings. LOL

        • http://stanoffewwords.wordpress.com/ Tristan

          Black girls are used to being stepped to in sweats and scarves going to the store, they don’t think about being more approachable because they’ve mostly just…been so

          • Yoles

            this is such a good point Trizzy….

            although i employ the white girl flirt tactic on the regular… i will sit back and think about what you said

        • http://www.youtube.com/user/pervertedalchemist1 Perverted Alchemist

          The answer to that isn’t really a secret- they just believe in being yourself, that’s all it is.

        • Epsilonicus

          I think so. Let me ask the wife lol

    • LeeLee

      Don’t feel bad. I do this too! I’m confident in general but a terrible flirt!

    • http://stanoffewwords.wordpress.com/ Tristan

      Awww now I just want to hit on you Lol

    • panamajackson

      I can understand this. Honestly, I think most of us wish that some magical force would take care of the hard part. lol

  • Andrea

    Just to be clear. Women should stay away from approaching? And just work on being approachable?

    • Sahel

      Nah,not in these post apocalyptic times. If you are interested go for it but be prepared if the party says no to you

    • http://www.twitter.com/IluminatiNYC Todd

      Sure. But most women aren’t approachable. They’re just waiting for the inspiration for a Keyshia Cole song to happen and live their lives that way.

      • Kenan

        Yea i never got that. Why do women go to clubs and parties like 10 deep. NO MAN WANTS TO FIGHT THROUGH A WALL OF VAGINAS!. And secondly, WHO REALLY HAS 10 DAMN FRIENDS! >_<

        • afronica

          Really? You don’t want to fight through a wall of vajayjay? *bemused smirk*

          • Kenan

            Not worth the stress! trust me lol

        • SuperStrings

          The girl circle…it has shunned more men than Excalibur.

    • http://stanoffewwords.wordpress.com/ Tristan

      Depends what you want, approaching gives you complete domain on who you let in, some pun intended

    • panamajackson

      I think women should go for what they want. If you see some dude you’re interested in, there’s nothing wrong with giving him a little help at arriving at the conclusion he needs to try to holler. But I do think that men still should do the lion’s share of any and all early wooing.

    • http://missrosen.wordpress.com/ esa

      you might consider it like this: do you enjoy taking risks ?

    • Epsilonicus

      I say if you want the attention of a guy, approach him.

    • Asiyah

      hi dear! how are ya? *waves*

    • miss t-lee

      Ha!

  • Medium Meech

    I’m what some insensitive members of the oppositesex may or may not have referred to as emotionally dyslexic. If a girl walks up to me in a bar an offers to buy me a drink, I’ll decline because that moment in my mind I’m thinking “is it that obvious I’m getting annoyed the bartender is ignoring me? That was nice of her but it’s matter of principal now. Sweet girl” Or if a girl tries to grab big Meech at a club I think “1) she has really bad aim, and 2) she really wants to know what time it is”. On the cab ride home I think, wait, do you think maybe that girl might have been interested in me? Na. Now if a girl is with some guy at the club who may or may not be her man smiles and says “excuse me” on her way to the bar my mind immediately starts down the path “hmmm, she only made minimal eye contact when she said excuse me. She must have known that I knew that she was feeling me and got embarrassed. That could be her man, but, but that could be her brother. He’s half Asian thoguh but maybe they have different fathers. Probably different mothers because they’re pretty much the same age. Or maybe twins with different fathers, think I saw that on an episode of Scrubs. And women put diamond rings on their ring fingers all the time these days. That’s a thing, right? She’s a little forward for my taste, but Ill give it a shot.” I can’t win.

    • JayIzUrGod

      The wonderful world of overactive imaginations that sh i t on a y glotious moment you can have. This is when being intelligent is just a pain in the a s s

      • http://stanoffewwords.wordpress.com/ Tristan

        Truuuuuu

      • Asiyah

        I forgot to reply to your message last week. I’m doing good, Jay. I hope you are too! xoxo

        • JayIzUrGod

          Good morning my dear, I’m glad you’re doing good. I’m……i got a hangover and I’m at work. So I’m great.

    • http://www.youtube.com/user/pervertedalchemist1 Perverted Alchemist

      This sounded like me back in 2001, LOLOL!

    • afronica

      *wonders what black movie classic Meech is referencing today*

      • Medium Meech

        Well, Afronica, it just so happens that this little slice of my life didn’t happen to mirror some Hollywood production by pure chance like some of the other entirely true stories I tell about myself do.

        • afronica

          *so slippery he’s oddly charming*

          • Medium Meech

            There’s a dirty joke in their somewhere. My thoughts are too pure to find it.

    • Asiyah

      Meechy, are you socially awkward? If you are, come sit by me. We can share anecdotes.

      • Medium Meech

        I’m not sure how to describe it, I’m pretty intuitive about most things, just not picking up on signals.

        • Lea Thrace

          So yes, you are socially awkward. Come join the club. This is a safe space. Embrace your limitations. :-D

          • Medium Meech

            Ummm, sure? *wonders how I should approach this delicate situation. Clearly Asiyah and Lea are choosing on me. Asiyah offered me a conditional seat in her vicinity and Lea gave me a pseudo internet smile. So this is how it feels to be a player*

            • Asiyah

              Yes, this is how it feels to be a player. Bask in that light, Meechy boo <3

              • Medium Meech

                Anything you say my paramour *puts on sunglasses and tells the DJ to play Drake’s discography to see if I can relate now*

          • Asiyah

            I’m loving the potential of a really awesome club here.

  • Jay

    I’ve been the guy who has missed OBVIOUS signs and I’ve been the guy who has been overconfident and seen signs that weren’t there. I’d always prefer to be the latter now. I won’t even remember a rejection the next day but reminiscing on potential bombshells that were giving me obvious rhythm that I was too much of a p*ssy to act on… that’s that sh*t that keeps me up at night… YEARS after the fact even. Eff a sign anyway, women will be in one of 3 categories: non-receptive(no-signs), neutral(questionable signs), and receptive(obvious signs). It’s up to the guy to figure out which one she’s in, and the best way to do this is by being forward and upfront. This not only saves time by clearing up ambiguity, it’s a turn-on for a lot of women which means that in the right situation it can make non-receptive and neutral women lean towards receptive. That’s the way I see it at least.

    • Heavens2Murgatroid

      Stepping up also gives you a level of control, most will find appealing as well

    • LeeLee

      You are spot on, sir.

    • b sweet

      Leave no stone unturned.

    • Jennifer

      I totally agree. I think that is exactly what happens and also leads to girls exchange numbers. Being bold and upfront is a good thing

  • Sahel

    I watch for subtle signs. If she touches her neck then smiles,that’s an erogenous zone people.Watch her feet and where she places her hands..and she ain’t a shy girl then it’s a sure thing if she drops it like it’s hot and gives you the lets do this hand sign