Sh*t Bougie Black People Love: Free Events Featuring Artists Who Definitely Need Your Money

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free events

If you look far enough into a Bougie Black Person’s (BBP) past, you’ll likely see that they went through a longer than expected period of time where they seriously entertained being an artist. The art itself varies—you’re likely to find connections to anything from guitar playing to graffiti curation—but six particular forms of art seem to be more popular than the rest: writing, rapping, singing, dancing, clothing designing, and producing music.

(Why writing, rapping, singing, dancing, designing clothes, and producing music? Well, they’re all art forms with regular Black people roots. And, as we all know, few things matter more to BBP than keeping their regular Black people roots.)

If you need proof, the next time you happen across a group of BBP having dinner at a Thai restaurant, ask each of them if they seriously thought they could be a full-time writer, rapper, singer, dancer, designer, or music producer if they put their time into it. There’s a 90% chance that at least 80% of them will say “Yes.” And, this “Yes” will be said without any hints of irony. “But,” they’ll follow with, attempting to explain why they never cultivated this particular talent “I have student loans. I can’t just drop everything and start singing full-time.”

But, while FAFSA and Sallie Mae are conspiring to keep the BBPs from winning Pulitzers and scoring multi-million dollar record contracts, this kindred connection to art is expressed in other ways, and the most common way is to search for and attend free events featuring artists whose art exhibits that they’re invested in the true essence of art. And, “artists whose art exhibits that they’re invested in the true essence of art” usually means “broke artists.”

These events are usually found at gallery crawls, community theaters, and the type of bohemian bookstores and nightclubs popularized in Love Jones and romanticized whenever Bougie Black girls fantasize about possibly meeting Frank Ocean or that guy who played Cutty on “The Wire.” To an outsider, it may be difficult to distinguish between BBP and Bipsters (Black hipsters) in a setting like this. After all, uber-fashionable Black people do tend to look alike, even to other Black people. But, since BBPs usually have corporate occupations, they tend to have less prominent facial hair and less visible tattoos than their bipster brethren. If still not clear, sit next to the bar. For obvious reasons, BBP also tend to have more disposable income than the bipsters, and they’re subsequently more likely to order wine and drinks with complex instructions than beer or any well alcohol.

Ironically, these free events tend to feature artists who definitely need money. Perhaps they’re not starving, but foundation grant money and Indiegogo only goes so far. Also ironic is the fact that BBP, who’d think nothing of dropping $120 for some nosebleeds at a Kanye West concert, wouldn’t think of attending these events if they weren’t free. Yet, what seems like it should be a paradox has practical purposes behind it.

1. BBPs feel a little guilty for being BBPs. Not guilty enough that they’d revert back to being regular Black, but guilty enough that they feel compelled to continually remind themselves, other BBP, and regular Black people that they still have regular Black people roots. Attending and consuming something that’s free of commercialization (and, usually, just free altogether) is an easy way to do this, serving the dual purpose of showing that they’re not too pretentious to still frequent venues that feature this type of art while also exhibiting that their tastes are both refined and grounded enough to appreciate it.

2. BBPs love free shit. If fact, you can argue that BBP enjoy figuring out ways not to spend money more than they enjoy making it.

(Ironically, this—the love of free shit—connects them to regular Black people more than any free concert would.)

3. There is no quicker way to impress a Bougie Black girl you may be interested in than taking her on a first date where a free event featuring artists who definitely need your money is somehow involved. Doing this would show her that you’re appropriately resourceful, appropriately cultured, and appropriately bougie enough for her to continue to scour Facebook for any sign that you might not be single.

If you happen to know a BBP and you also happen to attend one of these events with them, don’t be surprised if immediately following said event, they start talking about things like “finding creative outlets” and “soul nurturing” and “hating White people.” In the coming weeks, you may notice them growing their beards out a bit or “going natural.” They may even start a blog, or email you some tracks they laid a couple days ago after finding a studio time discount on Groupon.

If, no, when this happens, listen to their conversations about all the ideas they wish they had to the time to pursue, read their first five or so blog entries (and don’t say anything when the blog goes five months without an update), and listen to their tracks.

But, as a friend, when finished doing all of this, it’s also your duty to matter-of-factly drop a line about your 401k or how “Sallie Mae is kicking your ass” during a conversation. This will likely snap the BBP back to reality and remind him that attending free events featuring artists who definitely need you money is better than being one of them.

—Damon Young (aka “The Champ”)

293 thoughts on “Sh*t Bougie Black People Love: Free Events Featuring Artists Who Definitely Need Your Money”

    • I have to disagree with some points on this post:

      (1) BBP wanting to be a rapper??? Oh hellz bellz NO! That is all the way low totem pole ninjas with no education. Every street nonmofo factor ninjas want to be a rapper. Walk down any ATL or New Orleans street or go to any club and what will you find? Some guy trying to use the “I’m a rapper” as a pickup line.
      (2) Free spit? Who doesn’t love free spit? Even Oprah and Donald Trump loves free spit.
      (3) “free event featuring artists who definitely need your money is somehow involved”……..Please don’t confuse the BBP with the New Millenial Black Hipster (NMBH).

      Reply ↓

        • Fantasy? Yes. But proclamation? Not by the bougie.

          Now I will agree that the BBP must like the most ratchet rap music that is hot at the moment. And dance to said ratchet music at a club or house party. But then reject said ratchet music during philosophical discussions (either among black elite or among whites) about how rap music is disrespectful to the black community and is holding black people back. But also the BBP will proclaim to be an expert in all things rap (take sides in the Biggie vs Tupac debate).

          Reply ↓

      • “(1) BBP wanting to be a rapper??? Oh hellz bellz NO! That is all the way low totem pole ninjas with no education. Every street nonmofo factor ninjas want to be a rapper. Walk down any ATL or New Orleans street or go to any club and what will you find? Some guy trying to use the “I’m a rapper” as a pickup line.”
        .
        O: Chubb Rock went to Brown, was a National Merit Scholar and was studying to be a doctor. Chuck D’s academic pedigree is well documented. Lil Wayne(!) studied psychology in college. Kanye West…well, ’nuff said. The Roots met while in school. Guru and DJ Premier met while in college – same deal with the Black Sheep. JDilla was being considered as a candidate in avionics training, but elected to do his thing with music instead.
        .
        And that’s just off the top of my head. Hip Hop has a very rich history of both formally and informally educated Brothas.
        .
        You need to study your history more…much, much more.
        .
        O.

        Reply ↓

        • Not to pull your accuracy card, but Guru and Premier didn’t meet in college. They met via a demo recording that Guru happened upon. Guru graduated from Morehouse and Preem attended Prairie View A&M for a few years but didn’t graduate.

          Reply ↓

        • Going to college and graduating from college are two different things. Some of those you named dropped out. And umm? Didn’t Kanye West even title his first album, The College Dropout? Do your history. Lil wayne went to college then dropped out, then got a degree from Phoenix University (and it wasn’t psychology). And Lil Wayne is far from bougie (and so are the other rappers you named; except for Kanye West, who knows what he is). So not only should you do your history, you should stay on topic.

          Reply ↓

          • @GypsyCurl:
            “Going to college and graduating from college are two different things.”
            .
            O: Yes, that’s true; but you weren’t discussing that. You were discussing the apparent “fact” that rappers and the like lacked education; I offered proof (even with Panama’s clarification notwithstanding) to the contrary. You were saying?
            .
            “Some of those you named dropped out.”
            .
            O: Again, true; but so what? The fact remains that they were indeed educated. They had to possess the necessary talent to get into those schools in the first place. Which again, works against your point.
            .
            You were saying?
            .
            “And umm? Didn’t Kanye West even title his first album, The College Dropout?”
            .
            O: Indeed he did. Nevertheless my point stands. You were saying?

            “Do your history. Lil wayne went to college then dropped out, then got a degree from Phoenix University (and it wasn’t psychology).”
            .
            O: Is that right? From Lil Wayne’s Wikipedia entry, I quote: “He also revealed on The View that he switched to the University of Phoenix and majored in psychology taking online courses.”
            .
            http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lil_Wayne#Religion_and_higher_education
            .
            You were saying?
            .
            “And Lil Wayne is far from bougie (and so are the other rappers you named; except for Kanye West, who knows what he is).”
            .
            O: I never made any such claim. Do you know what a Strawman is? http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Straw_man
            .
            “So not only should you do your history, you should stay on topic.”
            .
            O: Look who’s talkin’…
            .
            O.

            Reply ↓

            • You are trying too hard to make everything into an argument. You should chill. I mean that in the nicest possible way. But I know you’re gonna take this as an opportunity to start another argument about nothing.

              Reply ↓

              • “You are trying too hard to make everything into an argument.”
                .
                O: Apparently not hard enough if you’re joining into the discussion…
                .

                “You should chill.”
                .
                O: My blood pressure has never been high.
                .
                “I mean that in the nicest possible way. But I know you’re gonna take this as an opportunity to start another argument about nothing.”
                .
                O: No; just not seeing the purpose of injecting yourself into something where it is patently clear you have nothing in the least constructive to add…
                .
                O.

                Reply ↓

        • in more recent news ::

          Afrika Bambaattaa received an honorary degree from Cornell, which is now home to the Hip Hop Archives. Joe Conzo’s photographs of the the Cold Crush sit on a shelf alongside the Gettysburg Address ~*~

          ooo chills

          Reply ↓

              • Madam, I am chill with anyone who’s chill with me. But when people attempt to discuss something that I’ve said, or, in this case, when someone makes an asinine remark that’s clearly not true, that reveals more their own ignorance and backwardness than anything else…well then, I can be a bit…rambunctious.
                .
                I do not, and will not, apologize for that.
                .
                O.

                Reply ↓

        • I believe Cajmere, house music DJ, genius and creator of the Percolator is chemical engineer. He dropped out of the masters program to pursue his DJing career. He is an alumnus of my school.

          Reply ↓

  2. “…listen to their conversations about all the ideas they WISH they had to the time to pursue…”
    -
    This is what stood out for me in the post.

    Life is too short to ‘wish’ upon a star. Pursue your passion to the fullest and to the best of your ability. Yes, bills have to be paid, but they don’t have to be paid through a corporate 9 to 5. Instead, find a way to make your passion pay the bills. Leverage your talent(s). Kudos to 2 Chainz. I honestly admire his spirit.

    Reply ↓

    • What’s up, AM!

      It’s not always bills that keep one from pursuing their dreams. Sometimes it’s just good old reality. Ish happens and there your dreams go down the drain. :-(

      Reply ↓

    • It’s not always about bills. Sometimes life just hands you a raw deal. Some people got bad health, some people have horrible families, some people are just born in places where they can never catch a break long enough to pursue anything positive.

      That’s why more than anything else, people just hope they get a chance at happiness in life before too much time passes…I know that’s what I do.

      Reply ↓

      • you know what has been interesting for me is to discover that my ishhy life (near death/abusive family) is the reason i have to write. not want to write. quite frankly if i had known this was what it was going to be, i would have never idealized it. it’s more pain than pleasure. i reflect often enough on Hemingway’s words, “There is nothing to writing. All you do is sit down at a typewriter and bleed.”

        maybe one day this will change, maybe not. Hemingway put a gun to his head. art, success, these things don’t necessarily make one happy. but i dont think art is about happiness. for me, it’s about freedom, and self mastery, and maybe somewhere in there, self respect.

        i think there may be a lot of other people who are called to create art as a way to purge pain from their veins. however, by the time it gets commodified and sold to us, we experience it as this santiized or sensationalized suffering, or we experience it as this mythologized nonsense.

        Reply ↓

        • I get what you are saying. Art to me is the ability to let your soul free. That’s why I believe art is open to interpretation, because there’s no way to actually describe a soul.

          I, like you, have all my haunted memories to give me inspiration as to what I should say. I just lack the focus because I had to figure out ways to take care of myself, rather than writing down my thoughts. I do believe everyone gets a chance to find their breakout moment, it just depends on what they do with it. Freedom is a hard concept to keep one opinion about.

          Reply ↓

          • focus is very hard to sustain. the act of writing calls up all kindsa demons and they be wanting cupcakes made of blood and brains. or some ishh like that. im sayinnn ..

            for me the thing is, negotiating the space of the unknown, allowing myself to be free and be fearless and to face my fears head on and most of all, not to give a fukk what other people say.

            in short :: if writing calls, pick up the phone.

            Reply ↓

            • Tellin my life with your words.

              I’m a writer too!

              And i love perfroming and sharing my work, but it’s those times when life is crazy and nobody is around where the most therapy happens and the rawest, most honest words come tumbling out.

              In terms of being successful, i believe the best artists became able to sustain themselves off of relevancy. the truth is ALWAYS ALWAYS relevant, and bougie or not, EVERYBODY relates to truth. Even liars relate to truth.

              Write ON!!!

              Reply ↓

              • (smile) your words give me life. especially the part that goes, “it’s those times when life is crazy and nobody is around where the most therapy happens and the rawest, most honest words come tumbling out.”

                you make it sound so uplifting, and maybe it is. to take off the weight is to be free of it. i need to adjust my frame.

                thank youuu ~*~

                Reply ↓

  5. “We are here fighting this war, because inside every gook, there’s an American, fighting to get out.”
    -From the film, “Full Metal Jacket”
    .
    My, my…this is an excellent post, good sir! Well done. It will be most interesting indeed to see who will confess to being those BBPs you so glowingly spoke of…everyone dont jump up all at once, now.
    .
    I know of what you speak almost too well, for ive been a fly on the wall along these lines for quite some time, and can vouchsafe all that you say. The sheer degree of pretentiousness at these events, the fakery, the BSery, is thick one could cut it with a machete, and boggles the mind. Exactly who do these folk think they are fooling? Too bad black psychologist types are too hidebound by their public/private overlords to care, because such a pheneomenon really does deserve its own white paper study.
    .
    In any event, since this is a forum that discusses in whole or in part relationships, ahem, there are two addendums id like to make and enter into the record:
    .
    1. It is often said that game only “works” on club going hoochies-”good gals”, much like the ones being described in this post, would never go in for such a thing. Only those who are either deeply ignorant or thoroughly disingenuous about the realities of human mating would deign to say such a thing. Not only does game work with a noted high rate of effectiveness among the bougie girl cohort, its even more effective wrt them then their more ratchet sistas. The reasons for this have been previously made clear by yours truly and has been alluded to my champ above; later this morning i may elaborate a bit on this particular point. For now though, suffice it to say, that such haunts are fertile hunting grounds for the studied seducer, and which routinely can yield much fruit. Who do you think all those poets be talking about, hmm?
    .
    2. And that leads us to our next and perhaps most important point. Ive found over the years, that there is a strain of brotha who is, in essence, a white knight in blackface. They tend to proliferate in venues like the one(s) champ describes, tends to have at least some and usually quite a bit of formal education, and is either an artistic type himself (or a wannabe one at least) or a “patron” of the arts. These are the types who can be seen or, since we’re all here online, “heard” in various virtual venues, pandering to what black women love to hear, like a poodle. Terms like “queen”, usually in combination with “black” or some variant thereof, are peppered throughout their speech, and if indeed they are poets or singers, their supplication is sure to carry over into their performances as well. Almost invariantly, their studied charisma and suite of seduction skills lay at a low ebb, though this is something most men arent attuned to lookout for, and most women are blinded to in such estrogen-rich environments-all they know and care about is homeboy is on the stage or in front of the room or at the dias, or failing that are being catered to like a proverbial sovereign-one of the relatively few spaces black women in general gets to experience such things. Only after the high of the event wears off and a mans true self is seen, does she get a real sense of what shes dealing with.
    .
    Which explains why so many of these sistas, if and when they take the stage themselves, speak so much about failed love. Hmm…
    .
    Ill hold here. Oh, and one last thing: fellas, enough with the mixed drinks hmm? I get that youre trying to signal your sophistication, but really, all youre saying is how woefully effete you are. Real men imbibe either beer or even better, spirits. Order yours neat, with no chaser. Mixed drinks are for girls.
    .
    Now adjourn your arses…
    .
    O.

    Reply ↓

    • “Oh, and one last thing: fellas, enough with the mixed drinks hmm? I get that youre trying to signal your sophistication, but really, all youre saying is how woefully effete you are. Real men imbibe either beer or even better, spirits. Order yours neat, with no chaser. Mixed drinks are for girls.”

      Dear Sir:

      Pipe ya bougie a&& down and get yourself a 4 Horsemen.

      Sincerely,

      J. Daniels.

      Reply ↓

      • Ha! Nice try but no cigar im afraid. Im far from bougie, one; and two, like i said, real men dont do mixed drinks…even if their four horsemen.
        .
        But i do thank you for your concern.
        .
        Sincerely,
        O.

        Reply ↓

        • Dear sir.

          i see we are at an impasse. unfortunately, you are quite wrong in what a real man drinks, but this is to be expected by one who is infected by imbibing p*sswater.

          I humbly hope that one day, a true gentleman can show you the error of your ways.

          Sincerely,

          J. Bean

          Reply ↓

          • “i see we are at an impasse.”
            .
            O: When you look around, you most definitely see a lot…
            .
            “unfortunately, you are quite wrong in what a real man drinks, but this is to be expected by one who is infected by imbibing p*sswater.”
            .
            O: Crude, not original, but succint. More ad hominem, please!
            .
            “I humbly hope that one day, a true gentleman can show you the error of your ways.”
            .
            O: Who said anything about being “a true gentleman” – who said that you were one – and who said that I had any such interest in such contrivances? Pray tell?
            .
            Sincerely,
            O.

            Reply ↓

            • Dear Bougie Bro,

              “”Who said anything about being “a true gentleman” – who said that you were one – and who said that I had any such interest in such contrivances? Pray tell?”

              I’m dreadfully sorry, see in my language, “real man” and “true gentleman are synonymous, and interchangable. I’ll duly note that for you they aren’t the same

              but since you stated that “real men imbibe beer or rather spirits”, could you please explain where you got your population sample of “real men”, and what, by definition is a “real man”? For Statistical purposes, of course.

              Respectfully,

              Started from the bottom, Now We Here

              Reply ↓

        • Come on O! Fa real? U think women care about what a guy drinks? We don’t. Confidence is key. Being secure enough in your manhood to drink whatever the hell u want- now THAT’S sexy! I’ll take a bossed-up dude with a margarita in front of him, over an insecure poser with a McAllen any day of the week!

          Reply ↓

          • I don’t know Ice…I might look at a man a ‘lil crazy if he orders a fuzzy navel in front of me….at least make it a mixed drink with some backbone..even a long island would prolly be ok…lol..I’m a Sapphire girl myself sooooo….*shrugs*

            Reply ↓

              • oh….yeah….a black card may change the game just a bit…but id’d still be thinking…”you got all this buying power in your hand and you buying a d*mn fuzzy navel”…lol!

                Reply ↓

                • @Camille:
                  I love it when a Woman expects me to buy her a drink; my response is terse, but highly effective:
                  .
                  “Why?”. Then, I sitback and watch carefully her reactions.
                  .
                  On occasion, a Woman will attempt to go a round or two with the Obsidian; it is at this juncture that I employ what I call the Shaharazad Test:
                  .
                  “Look, I’ll tell you what: you tell me a good story, and not only will I buy you a drink, but it’ll be the best, most expensive drink in the place. Go.”
                  .
                  Too bad not many ladies are very good storytellers these days…
                  .
                  O.

                  Reply ↓

                  • I like how you spoke of yourself in third person. However, I see we wouldnt make it far. I never expect a guy my drink. My approach is if he is going to buy it he will pull out his cash or card before i do. I never assume or act like Im entitled but i always appreciate when a man does. This is my way of cutting the potrential bs to a minimum. Im trying to sip play the wait and see game.

                    For the women that do expect you to buy their drink, I think that asking them to tell you a story is an interesting approach. Good way to eliminate undercover first class chicken heads.

                    Reply ↓

                  • @ O – I need clarification – are you saying that in my comment I somehow projected that I expect a man to buy me a drink? Because that’s not what I said, just to be clear my dear Sir O…..

                    Reply ↓

                • @Wu – lol….I’m glad you understand…I’m just sayin’…how you gonna order a d*mn fuzzy navel and I’m ordering a Sapphire or Hendricks gimlet?? somewhere in my mind i’m losing respect for you with every sip you take….i’d just rather you don’t drink then try to keep up with the Joneses with that wiggity-wiggity whack non-drink…but that’s just me…*kanyeshrugs*

                  Reply ↓

          • @Iceprincess:
            “Come on O! Fa real? U think women care about what a guy drinks?”
            .
            O: Please tell me what gave you the impression that I cared what Women thought in this instance? I simply said, that mixed drinks are for girls…and they are. Women by and large don’t like to imbibe spirits straight up. Men can and often do. As well they should, if they’re going to drink at all.
            .
            O.

            Reply ↓

          • “Come on O! Fa real? U think women care about what a guy drinks?”
            -
            You know, you would think this is some petty sh!t, right? I could hear an old Tevin Campbell song that spoke about bright tomorrows after reading this beautifully optimistic vote of confidence. What a man drinks should not matter at all and what you said seems….reasonable. There is a “nice” guy somewhere right now who would believe you, order a fuzzy to show how nice and unthreatening he is compared to dudes sipping 100 proof of vodka…..no oj, no straw….

            Of course a heterosexual man that is actually successful dating women knows that petty sh!t and facades matter, and he better be very confident bordering on unapologetically arrogant ordering a fuzzy navel at a bar full of 2000 now women. Thanks for the sincere answer Camilleblue.

            It’s lunch time. Where’s my vodka?

            Reply ↓

              • I hear you. I’m not mad at it either. I think I am the only person in the world that admits to judging men and women due to (fill in the blank). I think its human to do so.

                But, consider that we are cosigning questioning/judging a persons “manliness” because of his liquor choice…..and place that next to judgements made because of color or gender….it’s all kind of fcuked up, and all the same thing.

                Reply ↓

    • Nice post my dude. The only thing I would add is that on dates, go for microbrews and avoid spirits. If you know your beer, you can impart a great deal of sophistication while still looking sufficiently manly. On top of that, there’s less of a risk of either you or your date slipping up and getting drunk by surprise like there may be with spirits. Just a thought.

      Reply ↓

    • “2. And that leads us to our next and perhaps most important point. Ive found over the years, that there is a strain of brotha who is, in essence, a white knight in blackface. They tend to proliferate in venues like the one(s) champ describes, tends to have at least some and usually quite a bit of formal education, and is either an artistic type himself (or a wannabe one at least) or a “patron” of the arts. These are the types who can be seen or, since we’re all here online, “heard” in various virtual venues, pandering to what black women love to hear, like a poodle. Terms like “queen”, usually in combination with “black” or some variant thereof, are peppered throughout their speech, and if indeed they are poets or singers, their supplication is sure to carry over into their performances as well. Almost invariantly, their studied charisma and suite of seduction skills lay at a low ebb, though this is something most men arent attuned to lookout for, and most women are blinded to in such estrogen-rich environments-all they know and care about is homeboy is on the stage or in front of the room or at the dias, or failing that are being catered to like a proverbial sovereign-one of the relatively few spaces black women in general gets to experience such things. Only after the high of the event wears off and a mans true self is seen, does she get a real sense of what shes dealing with.”

      good point

      Reply ↓

    • @Triple H, from earlier in the thread:
      “I’m dreadfully sorry, see in my language, “real man” and “true gentleman are synonymous, and interchangable. I’ll duly note that for you they aren’t the same”
      .
      Apology noted and accepted! You will most certainly need it…
      .
      “but since you stated that “real men imbibe beer or rather spirits”, could you please explain where you got your population sample of “real men”, and what, by definition is a “real man”? For Statistical purposes, of course.”
      .
      O: Sure; as soon as you get me the empirical evidence that a “real man” and a “gentleman” is indeed, one and the same – or is that purely a creation on your part?
      .
      “Respectfully,

      Started from the bottom, Now We Here”
      .
      O: I see you have quite a ways to go…
      .
      O:

      Reply ↓

      • Dear “Bougie Bro”

        “O: Sure; as soon as you get me the empirical evidence that a “real man” and a “gentleman” is indeed, one and the same – or is that purely a creation on your part?”

        i would glady answer your inquisition, good sir, but considering that i was the one prosecuting your proclamations with pithy wit, wouldn’t it make sense to shore up your defenses on what you claim ‘real men’ drink, before you go on the offensive to disregard my subjective use of terms?

        ““Respectfully,

        Started from the bottom, Now We Here”
        .
        O: I see you have quite a ways to go…”

        Indeed i do, since i’m about to pass you twice…

        Signed,
        Hrizzy H.

        Reply ↓

        • “i would glady answer your inquisition, good sir, but considering that i was the one prosecuting your proclamations with pithy wit, wouldn’t it make sense to shore up your defenses on what you claim ‘real men’ drink, before you go on the offensive to disregard my subjective use of terms?”
          .
          O: In that I am being asked to defend my position – and that you are playing the role of the prosecution – it then fails to the latter (you) to prove your case; the defense’s job (me) is only to raise “reasonable doubt”. As I’ve said – I am more than willing to do as you ask, as soon as you have complied with the very request you have made of me. Fair enough?
          .
          “Indeed i do, since i’m about to pass you twice…”
          .
          O: Not with “skills” of argumentation like that you aren’t…
          .
          O.

          Reply ↓

          • Dear Bougie Bro,

            Ooooooh! I Guess you got me! You’re right!**

            Sincerely,
            -passed you Thrice

            ** – note: i actually don’t believe this, nor does anyone, but hey this the Obsidian show, who knows what other logic lines will be crossed. more importantly i’m getting bored, and arguing over what the correct drink a real man would drink, is something a fool would continue to do. Fellas, Four Horsemen – Jack, Jim, Jameson, Johnny. stay away from P*ssWater.

            Reply ↓

            • “note: i actually don’t believe this, nor does anyone, but hey this the Obsidian show, who knows what other logic lines will be crossed. more importantly i’m getting bored, and arguing over what the correct drink a real man would drink, is something a fool would continue to do. Fellas, Four Horsemen – Jack, Jim, Jameson, Johnny. stay away from P*ssWater.”
              .
              O: By “p*sswater”, I take it you mean beer? If so, please know that I said both that AND spirits. I didn’t favor one over the other.
              .
              And, you’re right about one thing: this entire was indeed a bit farcical on your part. I mean, out of all I’ve said about the matter under discussion, here comes Triple H to upbraid me on what is an otherwise relatively minor point. Never once, does Triple H actually examine the bulk of my comments; Triple H instead, by his/her own admission, wastes a goodly amount of his/her time, again, attempting to upbraid me on a relatively minor point. And this is what Black folk have a very bad tendency to do – get lost in the forest and missing the trees. Majoring in the minors. Making mountains out of moehills. Refusing to grapple with the argument, instead opting to want to take it to the messenger.
              .
              In a word, Bunk.
              .
              Thank you, Triple H, for showing us all your true colors. I knew it would dawn on you eventually to cut the crap.
              .
              O.

              Reply ↓

              • Dear Big Bougie Bro.

                Thank you for the dissertation!

                *round of applause* #Flocka

                i’m trying to see what the best part of this was…
                “Triple H instead, by his/her own admission, wastes a goodly amount of his/her time, again, attempting to upbraid me on a relatively minor point. And this is what Black folk have a very bad tendency to do – get lost in the forest and missing the trees. Majoring in the minors. Making mountains out of moehills. Refusing to grapple with the argument, instead opting to want to take it to the messenger.”

                Bravo good sir. Bravo! i mean, to break it down so (non)consisely (as typical with your posts)…i mean this is a trademark comment from you! the only thing missing is…data and links proving your point…but since this really isn’t fact, just your conjecture…data isn’t necessary :)

                and for the record, you’re quite right, i wasted a godly amount of time (possibly 10-15 minutes typing theses howmanyever responses) on something rather irrelevant, your opinions. but i apologize to the class, to black society, and to you oh great and mighty Oz-sidian

                Please everyone, sit around, take your notebooks out, and sit at the feet of Obsidian, may he preach the Beatitudes of Game! Verily Verily i say unto thee, those that choose not to heed the words of this wiseman will be destined to actually be themselves around women! While drinking beer!

                (oh and spirits.)

                Signed,
                Table Tennis Master while recording My Debut Allllllbummmmmm

                Reply ↓

    • @GypsyCurl:
      “Lame semantics.”
      .
      O: Lame projection…
      .
      “Every response to your comment or opinion is not a challenge.”
      .
      O: Yes, this is true; however, most of your responses are rather weaksauce ones.
      .
      “Your defensive retorts remind me of a Cosby Show episode when Dr. Huxtable took Rudy to tap dancing class and he started tap dancing with this old man. The old man kept saying “Chal-LANGE!” I laugh every time I think about that episode and everytime I read your comments.”
      .
      O: And you make me cringe everytime I read yours, I’m afraid. But it warms my heart to know, that I make you smile.
      .
      O.

      Reply ↓

    • If I’m not a real man for hating beer, drinking mixed drinks, and despising buying shots of liquor to impress people who aren’t worth my pubic hairs, then my sissy ass shall continue to drink my colored drinks. Because I THOUGHT if I was drinking, I should ENJOY what I drink…no different than eating. I refuse to get wasted on stuff that makes my mouth feel like Hiroshima after the blast.

      Reply ↓

      • *BOL at the line “Hiroshima after the blast*
        .
        Rewind, my good sir, they don’t call such things “an acquired taste” for nothing. Good spirits are *supposed* to “explode” a bit in your mouth – wouldn’t be hard liquor if it didn’t, hmm?
        .
        Just a thought…
        .
        O.

        Reply ↓

        • O, I’m saying, I know most hard liquors are an acquired taste, but that shouldn’t change the fact that one should ENJOY the taste. I admit, I am not the type to have super fruity drinks but I do like mixing my liquors with certain juices and getting a concoction that will make anyone say “DAMN”(if you could see the amount of liquor I have access to and understand how much I practice making new drinks per day, you’d fear for my liver).

          Reply ↓

      • “I refuse to get wasted on stuff that makes my mouth feel like Hiroshima after the blast.”
        —
        lol….d*mn rewind…I nah want a war enna your mout

        Reply ↓

        • ha @ Camille…I’m saying though, I’ve had plenty of liquor and most of it tastes horrible by itself. But mixing things together..then liquor is awesome.

          Reply ↓

          • @Rewind…by all means…make it do what it do & mix away baby…just know that if you and I go out for drinks i’m gonna get some clownin’ in on you for that fuzzy navel lol…

            Reply ↓

            • lmao as you should, because I’d never order something that damn weak. My mixed drinks need at least 3 specific liquors. I bet if I made my watermelon shots (watermelon juice, gin, melon vodka, ginger liquor), you’d never try to clown me.

              Reply ↓

    • @CamilleBlue:
      “@ O – I need clarification – are you saying that in my comment I somehow projected that I expect a man to buy me a drink? Because that’s not what I said, just to be clear my dear Sir O…..”
      .
      O: No, you did not say that. But it is clear that Women do expect these things on the part of Men when out and about the mating grounds out there on the modern day Savannah. You may not, fair enough. But clearly, quite a few Women do.
      .
      I merely offer observations – and solutions – towards managing these realities for the Brothas who want them.
      .
      O.
      .
      #datingriskmanagement

      Reply ↓

      • mmmm…i think it depends on the situation my dear O…the only time i expect a man to buy me a drink (if we are indeed drinking – or plan to drink) is if we are on a date that he initiated…
        —–

        it sounds like you have had a woman you don’t really know to just straight up ask you to buy her a drink…because that’s the only scenario that i can think of that would require you to respond by asking her to tell you a story and then say “go”….that shid right there would be a neagtive on the play…..b/c my stories are worth more than a drink… ;) …lol

        Reply ↓

        • @CamilleBlue:
          Actually, my formulation of the Shaharazad Test was in direct response to Women asking Men for drinks (as well as myself), and, I must say, the reactions on the part of the ladies is nothing short of priceless. Women are soooooo used to not having to answer hard questions as to exactly what, and how, their mating value, and what it should mean to potential suitors out on the mating market. The assumption is, that if the ladies show up, all will be well.
          .
          I love forcing people to question – deeply – their assumptions.
          .
          O.

          Reply ↓

          • Although I wouldnt make it to you asking me this question, I thoroughly enjoy this approach. Im not mad at all.

            “Sometimes you gotta use what you got(answers)…”-Ebony

            Reply ↓

        • Nice.

          I agree, a date that I was invited to go on is the only time I expect my drinks to be paid for. That story thing can only work on a certain type of woman. The type I dont roll with.

          Reply ↓

          • @ Sweet….and truth be told…If I’m out (not a date, but just out) and a man is chatting me up and I’m actually enjoying the conversation, I’ll probably buy him a drink…conversely…if a man’s conversation (or lack of) is making me want to stick a pin in my eye, then I won’t allow him to buy me a(nother) drink…because men equate buying drinks with #wegotogether… I’m not ever that d@mn thirsty…

            Reply ↓

            • True. I had a man call me out when he saw me in another club months later on a drink that he offered and insisted that he buy. Since we didnt hit it off after a couple phonecalls and texts, I think he wanted me to give him his money back. I should have never accepted that drink. Smh.

              Reply ↓

    • @Sweet GA Brown:
      “I like how you spoke of yourself in third person.”
      .
      O: I like it that you like it that I spoke of myself in the third person.

      “However, I see we wouldnt make it far.”
      .
      O: Parting is such sweet sorrow…
      .
      “I never expect a guy my drink.”
      .
      O: Really? Do tell…
      .
      “My approach is if he is going to buy it he will pull out his cash or card before i do.”
      .
      O: And, what if he doesn’t?
      .
      “I never assume or act like Im entitled but i always appreciate when a man does.”
      .
      O: You would be a rare bird indeed, if this is in fact the case…
      .
      “This is my way of cutting the potrential bs to a minimum. Im trying to sip play the wait and see game.”
      .
      O: Interesting; so, again, let’s say that the guy in question doesn’t in fact reach for his plastic/cash; then what?
      .
      “For the women that do expect you to buy their drink, I think that asking them to tell you a story is an interesting approach. Good way to eliminate undercover first class chicken heads.”
      .
      O: LOL. I’m glad you approve! But, I must say – with a goodly degree of interest I might add – that I didn’t formulate the Shaharazad Test for use with “chickenheads”. In truth, Ratchet Sistas don’t trouble guys in that way. No, I formulated it in response to the very kinds of Sistas that comprise the nature of Champ’s post today. And, I have found it qutie effective in numerous field tests.
      .
      O.

      Reply ↓

      • I never expect a guy my drink.”
        .
        O: Really? Do tell…-To expect is to act entitled to things that belong to someone who is not obligated to do anything for me. So if a stranger that I am conversing with decides that he wants to then thats a nice gesture.
        .
        “My approach is if he is going to buy it he will pull out his cash or card before i do.”
        .
        O: And, what if he doesn’t?- If the conversation is casual I dont think anything of it. If he is trying to exchange numbers and I finished a drink during our convo and Im ordering another and I pull out my card while he stops speaking so I can finish my transaction, I will assume that he isn’t really worth my time. Men that watch my money transactions are highly suspect.
        .
        “I never assume or act like Im entitled but i always appreciate when a man does.”
        .
        O: You would be a rare bird indeed, if this is in fact the case…-I hate to think I’m rare. I really do. Idk. I don’t do thirsty.
        .
        “This is my way of cutting the potrential bs to a minimum. Im trying to sip play the wait and see game.”
        .
        O: Interesting; so, again, let’s say that the guy in question doesn’t in fact reach for his plastic/cash; then what?- Forgive ALL my typos. I meant to say that Im trying to sip. Not play the wait and see game. If he doesnt reach I can still hold a convo with him. I refuse to go thirsty waiting to see if a guy be my 5min sponsor.

        O: LOL. I’m glad you approve! But, I must say – with a goodly degree of interest I might add – that I didn’t formulate the Shaharazad Test for use with “chickenheads”. In truth, Ratchet Sistas don’t trouble guys in that way. No, I formulated it in response to the very kinds of Sistas that comprise the nature of Champ’s post today. And, I have found it qutie effective in numerous field tests.

        -Different breeds of the chickenhead species are being discovered everyday.

        Reply ↓

        • “To expect is to act entitled to things that belong to someone who is not obligated to do anything for me. So if a stranger that I am conversing with decides that he wants to then thats a nice gesture.”
          .
          O: I see. OK, let’s try it this way – many Women fully expect Men to hold doors open and the like. I won’t ask if you feel this way, but clearly, quite a few Women (read: Sistas) do. Question: why should ANY Man, in the year 2013AD, do ANY of that, for ANY Woman he is not either (A) genetically related to or (B) not currently in a very active sexual relationship? Perhaps you might be able to explain.
          .
          “If the conversation is casual I dont think anything of it. If he is trying to exchange numbers and I finished a drink during our convo and Im ordering another and I pull out my card while he stops speaking so I can finish my transaction, I will assume that he isn’t really worth my time. Men that watch my money transactions are highly suspect.”
          .
          O: Getting a standard number close doesn’t take long at all; I’ve done it in a minute, two at most? Your response is most interesting.
          .
          “I hate to think I’m rare.”
          .
          O: You’re not. Vast scores of Sistas in our time still do expect Brothas to act as if they were living in the Mad Men era, while they enjoy the luxuries of the 21st century. I think not…
          .
          “Forgive ALL my typos. I meant to say that Im trying to sip. Not play the wait and see game. If he doesnt reach I can still hold a convo with him. I refuse to go thirsty waiting to see if a guy be my 5min sponsor.”
          .
          O: Good! The interaction is supposed to be about enjoying each other’s company. Buying drinks should have nothing to do with that.
          .
          “Different breeds of the chickenhead species are being discovered everyday.”
          .
          O: Apparently so…
          .
          O.

          Reply ↓

          • O: I see. OK, let’s try it this way – many Women fully expect Men to hold doors open and the like. I won’t ask if you feel this way, but clearly, quite a few Women (read: Sistas) do. Question: why should ANY Man, in the year 2013AD, do ANY of that, for ANY Woman he is not either (A) genetically related to or (B) not currently in a very active sexual relationship? Perhaps you might be able to explain.

            I dont expect for a man to hold a door for me. I except for a person walking ahead of me to get the door because its common courtesy. I recently had a guy kick it to me like no woman he is with will ever get a door and if i get it im wrong. I told him that he better reach before I do. I m not going to stop in front of a closed door and wait for it to be opened. However, women believe that they train some one how to treat them. If this is so then ppl react to certain situations accordingly. I do agree with the statement but my approach to things are different. I let a person do what they will and if i dont like it I let them know and/or remove them from my life.

            Reply ↓

    • When are you going to get your own blog?

      OH RIGHT… you already have one that no one wants to read so you copy and paste it here.

      Smh.

      Reply ↓

      • Actually, I have quite a few people who read my blog everyday – even when I’m not posting there. They just don’t comment, so you’ll have to take my word for it.
        .
        Annnnnnd, how are you today, Ms. SweetSass? Still hiding behind that God-awful avi, I see. When are you let us all see your face and survey the damage?
        .
        O.

        Reply ↓

        • Well, speak of the proverbial devil!
          .
          @Triple H from earlier upthread…
          .
          “Dear Big Bougie Bro.”
          .
          O: I’m not Bougie.
          .

          “Thank you for the dissertation!”
          .
          You’re welcome – I think?

          “*round of applause* #Flocka”
          .
          O: I’m afraid I’m not a fan.
          .
          “i’m trying to see what the best part of this was…
          “Triple H instead, by his/her own admission, wastes a goodly amount of his/her time, again, attempting to upbraid me on a relatively minor point. And this is what Black folk have a very bad tendency to do – get lost in the forest and missing the trees. Majoring in the minors. Making mountains out of moehills. Refusing to grapple with the argument, instead opting to want to take it to the messenger.”

          “Bravo good sir. Bravo! i mean, to break it down so (non)consisely (as typical with your posts)…i mean this is a trademark comment from you! the only thing missing is…data and links proving your point…but since this really isn’t fact, just your conjecture…data isn’t necessary”
          .
          O: *bowing slightly* I don’t write for those who have the attention span of a gnat; since you’ve been able to follow the bouncing ball, you are to be commended. As for the citation of sources – surely, you jest. I cite more sources per capita in this forum than the vast majority of its participants. My commentary is deeply informed by said sources. Feel free to inquire about them at any time you are ready.

          In the meantime, do you agree or disagree with what I’ve said about Game proving itself effective on certain types of Women, over others? Do you agree or disagree, about what I’ve said about White Knights in Blackface – which proliferate throughout the real life venues Champ has noted, and as well as online (I can name names, if you like)? Why are you seemingly so deadset against me imparting information to Brothas out there who may be wanting what I offer? Why does that bother you so? What is it about Game and studied charisma and skilled seduction, that rankles and alarms you? Why all the butthurt? Why all the thinly vieled hate?
          .
          What is up with that?
          .
          Are you really interested in having a discussion – or are you interested in trying to attack me? If the former, I welcome it! – if the latter, all it will do is strengthen my position…and (further) weaken yours.
          .
          “and for the record, you’re quite right, i wasted a godly amount of time (possibly 10-15 minutes typing theses howmanyever responses) on something rather irrelevant, your opinions. but i apologize to the class, to black society, and to you oh great and mighty Oz-sidian”
          .
          O: You were the one who made it a point about how much time you were wasting, after all – which, when coupled with your general all-around butthurtness, does raise some questions as to your motivations to respond to me in the first place. Freud, Jung and Erickson would have a field day with that…
          .
          “Please everyone, sit around, take your notebooks out, and sit at the feet of Obsidian, may he preach the Beatitudes of Game! Verily Verily i say unto thee, those that choose not to heed the words of this wiseman will be destined to actually be themselves around women! While drinking beer!
          (oh and spirits.)”
          .
          O: Reading IS fundamental, dontcha know…and yes, whomseover will, them them come…don’t hateth the player; hateth thy Game…”
          .
          “Signed,
          Table Tennis Master while recording My Debut Allllllbummmmmm”
          .
          O: And here I was thinking you were playing Pocketball…while recording your debut allllllllllbuuuuuuuum…
          .
          O.

          Reply ↓

          • Dear Wizard of Oz (aka Bougie Bro #1; BBB Fraternity INNNNNNCorporated),

            “In the meantime, do you agree or disagree with what I’ve said about Game proving itself effective on certain types of Women, over others?”

            Game works, on certain types of women as you said. are those the women that an man wants?

            That’s…up to him.

            “Do you agree or disagree, about what I’ve said about White Knights in Blackface – which proliferate throughout the real life venues Champ has noted, and as well as online”

            Simps, panderers exist, online and offline. Sh*t i might cape from time to time for the heck of it. if you wanna name names, be our guest, be our guest, put your skills to the test

            “Why are you seemingly so deadset against me imparting information to Brothas out there who may be wanting what I offer? Why does that bother you so? What is it about Game and studied charisma and skilled seduction, that rankles and alarms you? Why all the butthurt? Why all the thinly vieled hate?”

            It’s not butthurt as you say. It’s really bemusement. Well, that’s what i’m aiming after anyway.

            Like, a tiger learning how a hyena gets its meals, and laughing to hisself.

            “Are you really interested in having a discussion – or are you interested in trying to attack me?”

            I don’t have discussions with those who are dead set on pushing their agenda. Who see themselves as 102.7% correct. So no, there is no discussions, there is no attacking. You’re just amusing in my world, on my show, for the current era in time. Nothing more, nothing less.

            Nothing that you push is wrong, all of your data is factual and actual. You’re supremely confident in your vision being correct, that your statistics, data show how “game” works.

            GREAT!

            the bad thing for me, on my home planet of Mars, that doesn’t work. So we do things differently. What exactly do we do differently, is irrelevant. Why? because “Game works”… lol :)

            oh and if you feel butthurt for me picking on you, i’ll stop. i could understand if i had a message i had been divinely inpsired to preach to the masses (well the hundreds, anyway) and this..this… “HHH” just keeps with the annoying side-chatter…
            i could see how that could be a stickler to your plans. So i’ll leave you be for the rest of the week. Cool beans Oz?

            Sincerely,

            Al. U. Card

            Reply ↓

    • @Triple H:
      Ah – there you are! I was beginning to think your heart wasn’t in it. Replies below:
      .
      “Dear Wizard of Oz (aka Bougie Bro #1; BBB Fraternity INNNNNNCorporated),

      “In the meantime, do you agree or disagree with what I’ve said about Game proving itself effective on certain types of Women, over others?”

      “Game works, on certain types of women as you said.”
      .
      O: That’s not quite what I said. I said that Game has a high rate of effectiveness on the kinds of Women Champ was referring to in this post. Game works with Ratchets too, you just have to calibrate for them accordingly. There, fixed that for ya.
      .
      “are those the women that an man wants?

      That’s…up to him.”
      .
      O: Indeed; if not, no harm, no foul. Again, why is it so big a deal for you, being that you’re out there with the Curiosity rover and whatnot? What business is it to you, one way or another? Or is the butthurt so overwhelming that you simply cannot help yourself? Tell the truth and shame the devil, now…
      .
      “Simps, panderers exist, online and offline. Sh*t i might cape from time to time for the heck of it. if you wanna name names, be our guest, be our guest, put your skills to the test”
      .
      O: Sure. The vast majority of “Black relationship blogs that are helmed by Black Men fall into the catergory I mentioned earlier. I’m glad that we seem to agree.
      .
      “It’s not butthurt as you say.”
      .
      O: Riiiight…
      .
      “It’s really bemusement. Well, that’s what i’m aiming after anyway.”
      .
      O: Nobody’s gonna accuse you of being a Marine sniper, that’s for sure…
      .
      “Like, a tiger learning how a hyena gets its meals, and laughing to hisself.”
      .
      O: Well, if no one else toots your horn, you gotsta go for self, right?
      .
      “I don’t have discussions with those who are dead set on pushing their agenda.”
      .
      O: No wonder you’ve been so lonely – because everyone has an agenda. Everyone. Including you. I’m just much more open about mine. Perhaps that’s what bothers you, hmm?
      .
      “Who see themselves as 102.7% correct.”
      .
      O: You have yet to actually address anything I’ve said that was patently false – and I note that this is not by accident. Ad Hominem will get you nowhere, son.
      .
      “So no, there is no discussions, there is no attacking. You’re just amusing in my world, on my show, for the current era in time. Nothing more, nothing less.”
      .
      O: Please. You’re fooling no one but yourself. Your kneejerk reactionary responses betray you. What a shame.
      .
      “Nothing that you push is wrong, all of your data is factual and actual. You’re supremely confident in your vision being correct, that your statistics, data show how “game” works.”
      .
      O: Why does that bother you so? Does my confidence unsettle you? Makes you question all your pretty lie-laden beliefs as to how and why the real world of human mating works? Hmm?
      .
      “GREAT!”
      .
      O: Yes, it most certainly is…

      “the bad thing for me, on my home planet of Mars, that doesn’t work.”
      .
      O: Fear not, for there is hope for you, my son…even on Mars…
      .
      “So we do things differently. What exactly do we do differently, is irrelevant. Why? because “Game works”… lol”
      .
      O: 3 Billion served – and counting!
      .
      “oh and if you feel butthurt for me picking on you, i’ll stop. i could understand if i had a message i had been divinely inpsired to preach to the masses (well the hundreds, anyway) and this..this… “HHH” just keeps with the annoying side-chatter…
      i could see how that could be a stickler to your plans. So i’ll leave you be for the rest of the week. Cool beans Oz?”
      .
      O: Actually, I find you to be endlessly fascinating – as I do all hecklers and haters. Because, well, haters gonna hate and sh*t. Please, by all means – continue!

      Yours truly,
      O.

      Reply ↓

  6. This is ME. I spend the first Thursday of the month at the art museum (free) and at art galleries (free food & wine.) All summer long, Friday at noon are free concerts in the park, and free Shakespeare in the park.
    I also go to pay what you can (minimum, or in my case maximum $5) theater, ballet and opera.
    Yes, I do all the bourgie sh*t…FREE

    Reply ↓

        • It’s all a catch 22 in the bougie world. Trying vs being. Who’s the Talented Mr. Ripley and who’s the one that actually belongs?

          Reply ↓

        • The difference is in the comfort and the emphasis. If you make a point of it, you are trying to prove you belong to a social class. And nothing shows you are NOT part of that social class more than trying to prove it. If you need someone to see you there or hear about it, you’re trying to prove something. If you just go because you enjoy the art, but the words “being cultured” don’t enter your had or, God forbid, come out of your mouth, then you have enough comfort with the material and you’re not trying to prove something.

          Reply ↓

          • “The difference is in the comfort and the emphasis. If you make a point of it, you are trying to prove you belong to a social class. And nothing shows you are NOT part of that social class more than trying to prove it. If you need someone to see you there or hear about it, you’re trying to prove something.”

            i guess what I’m saying is how can an outsider tell which is which? i mean, if i see two people at a museum, how can I tell which one is the poseur and which one isnt?

            Reply ↓

            • in my experience, poseurs tend to repeat other people’s ideas, meaning they read the plaques, the listen to the headsets, they need to acquire “information” in order to feel like their experience of the art is valid. then they spend an inordinate amount of time repeating this information verbatim.

              i dont disrespect poseurs, because i understand them. they dont trust their own ideas or interpretations, so they try to cover it up by copying someone else. the only thing that gets me is that i find talking distracting. this is totally personal, of course, but for me art can be very spiritual and i would rather not have words invading my space while experiencing most forms of art.

              Reply ↓

            • Honestly, it’s no different from fakers of any kind. A fake lover of sports feels the need to remind you they know the teams, players, and stats, but show no true love for the sport. A fake gamer claims to know and play all the famous titles, but can’t express what made them care for games in the first place. If you do something because you like it, it has emotional value to you. Even if you don’t like something and you do it, you still have some kind of emotional response to it. But if you’re trying to show other human beings what you know about something, without them asking or giving you a need to prove your point, you’re simply just trying to be seen, heard, or acknowledged. That’s fakery.

              Reply ↓

        • Being cultured is like being rich or classy or educated….if you have to proclaim that you are, chances are you aren’t….

          You can smell the pretentious funk on a lot of ppl who volunteer factoids about their cultural breadth “oh, if i havent mentioned it already, I’m writing a screenplay…thats between my bikram yoga and glass blowing classes down at the learning annex, of course”

          after a while its like BLAHHHHHH, let your actions speak for themselves….

          the bougie events are slowly but surely becoming just as annoying as the ratchet events—just two sides of the same coin.

          Granted everyone has to start SOMEWHERE to be cultured….just go, you dont have to proclaim it and get fb deep on us….just dew yew bew bew lol

          Reply ↓

      • I want you to help me out. I am in a funk and I’ve decided to finally write a book of poetry, a novel, and a collection of raps. Just need a little guidance for a few steps.

        Reply ↓

        • here’s my only advice :: do what is in your heart. if you are a person who adheres to discipline and structure, use this as your guiding star. if you love chaos, let it be your path. the process is what heals. the end is an illusion. it’s just another step along the way.

          i dont like authority, so i dont want to be one, but in the interest of sharing, i will use my experience as one example. here it is, my official statement on writing :: i have no idea what i am doing.

          it’s maddening, and humbling, and inspiring, and numbing. but mostly it is a challenge to myself, to peel back every last layer so that i can be naked on the page.

          whether someone reads this or not, that’s second of all. first i have to get it out, and that is the hardest thing of all.

          so, back to my advice :: you already know. you dont know everything but you know what you need to begin and that is the confidence and courage that Your Voice Matters.

          cause it does ~*~

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  11. Cutty doing his thing in The Walking Dead tho. He ain’t even really do anything yet and he’s more relevant than T-Dog in three seasons. I’m still waiting for him to backhand a zombie like he did the chick of the guy skimming money from Marlo.

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      • His character does get killed pretty soon in the comics, I’m just surprised they introduced him the way they did. In the comics, his character gets a real bad circumstance to deal with.

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      • in the comic book, cutty’s character “tyreese” gets his head cut off.

        the little black samurai chick gets killed too……dunno if this’ll happen on the television show or not….just thought i’d be a dyk and give spoilers just in case it does…….

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          • In the comics, Shane dies by like #5. I was surprised the show let him last as long as they did. It’s hard to explain how good The Walking Dead story is to anyone who only watches the TV show, because the comics are so much more brutal and horrifying. TV could never show what that comic shows.

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    • I love how The Wire actors will always be remember by their character names, not their real names. I see Kema in real life all the time. I can never remember her name and I always just call her Kema.

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  12. when it comes down to it, i’ve always been a populist. i’d rather tear down a wall then build one up. i loathe an ivory tower and a white cube. i am into inclusion, not exclusion, and i love how it feels to belong ~somewhere~

    the art i produce, promote, participate in, the art that makes my heart soar and my head spin, this is what makes me feel alive and gives my life purpose. if anyone is interested, here are some upcoming shows you might dig ::

    Feb 14 :: Innaviews at the Pregones Theater, the Bronx. written, directed, produced by and starring Rokafella and Qwikstep, a story of love, dance, and Nuyorican roots.

    Feb 16 :: Fashion Moda panel discussion at the Bronx Documentary Center with Jane Dickson, Lisa Kahane, Ed Morales, and Jorge Pabon. Fashion Moda was The gallery back in the days.

    Opening Feb 23 :: Pump Me Up: D.C. Subculture of the 1980s exhibition at the Corcoran. graffiti + go-go + hardcore. all kindsa remember when ..

    Through Feb 28 :: Jamel Shabazz exhibition at the Brooklyn Public Library, Grand Army Plaza branch. Shabazz changed the game and i love him for it.

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    • First, thanks for the Jamel Shabazz shout out. It looks somewhat interesting, and I want to check it out.

      That said, since you’re an art head, I have a question for you that has gnawed at me for the past few weeks. Why is it that so much art is so demanding? It’s like they want to control my life and tell me what to think and make me feel that I’m somehow beneath them. If I wanted that, I’d visit my mother more often thanks. Why is it so hard for creative people to let the work breathe and let people interpret it? Though I do admit I prefer craftsmanship to creative, this kind of annoys me about art.

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      • excellent questions !

        one caveat :: my observations are based on my experience working in the industry, and now transitioning into a dual industry/artist career. i’ve spent a lot of time with people on both sides, so while what i observe is not true for everyone, it’s true for me and for some of the people i know.

        first i would say that most artists are narcissists (no disrespect intended, pathology is without judgment in my life). narcissists are inclined to see everything, including other people, as an extension of themselves, therefore they have a very difficult time allowing other people to engage with their work on their own terms.

        however, most working artists work with industry folk (publishers, media, galleries, museums, foundations, etc). these industry folk have agendas and use the art to create a veil of authority, ownership, and righteousness. industry folk are shadow artists, meaning they wanted to be the one out there but didnt have the balls so they fell back to play their position, that is, take the risk on someone else.

        industry folk are more invested and less introspective about their investment. they tend to spout party lines without question. this is because they are not creating the original so they need to mythologize it, to give their lives the level of importance and validity that they are not getting because they are not creating the work itself.

        the thing about industry folk is, they need art to exalt them in order to maintain their importance. so they mystify the object itself in order to create “value”, be it monetary and/or political worth. a lot of this requires art being inaccessible to people, as a way to prove itself. but quite frankly it’s so transparent to anyone who stops to think.

        my friend brought me to Chelsea last September, opening night at the galleries, thousands of people in the streets smiling and happy and me, i was growling at the art. it was a horror show. it was all produce (produce !) for banks and investment firms. it was all fourth-quarter rent come due disguised as “art” and no one seemed to care. they just felt important being there.

        that’s my problem with art. it should not confer self importance. it should not exalt the individual to superiority. for me, art is a very humbling experience, one that is completely beyond words. for me, art is inclusionary. it’s not always readily apparent what it “is” but for me great art is not perceived by the mind but felt by the body. art is the soul made manifest ..

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        • “Advertising is the greatest art form of the 20th century.” – Marshall McLuhan

          Yes Orwell said that because he understood that art does not seek to massage the mind and put thoughts in it, but rather art seeks to overwhelm the emotions, just like all those Superbowl commercials aim to do and why people pay millions of dollars for them.

          Ever since the early 20th Century, Industry has been using advertising to maintain it’s consumer base; without advertising there would be no television or even radio to a lesser extent. That’s probably why they are so attached to museums and paintings, they owe their success and dominance to them.

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          • yes ~*~

            once upon a time the church and the state funded art. i dont mean on some NEA grant. i mean on some “this is how we teach you what to believe.”

            in America, where money is our leader and our God, it is the corporations that have taken the place of the Medici-style patronage. it ranges from the subtle (PBS-style) to the creative (product as part of the collaborative process, such as Nike partnerships with artists) to the blatant (advertising disguised as journalism, such as the launch of a new Apple product).

            the patronage/propaganda connection exists everywhere except in the true outsider artists who do not trade in their integrity for money or status. but, inevitably, outsider artists are discovered and can be converted into the fold, most often by their “handlers” who are sociopaths in sheep clothes.

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            • I can’t disagree with you, but I’ll say I don’t blame them.

              Growing up as a kid, I remember in 1st grade some fat white boy tried to bully me for my lunch money and I effed him up: I gave him a karate chop to the neck, kicked him in the nuts and then once he landed on his back I pummeled him. I got suspended for a week; him for a month.

              That’s how I treated bullies all my life. I for one have always thought that if someone attacks you with guns, you should defend yourself with guns. If someone attacks your mind, you should defend yourself with your mind. And that’s how corporations attack and beat us every single day.

              Our society – the dependent society – always asks the bullies to not attack, except all they really do is encourage more forms of passive aggressive bullying (which is surprisingly much more effective, and has caused more people to commit suicide than simply punching people in the face or hanging them upside down ever did).

              We’ve forgotten that having confidence in yourself to deal with and defend yourself from the punches and obstacles that life throws at you, is more important than having them banned from existence or just simply “regulated.”

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      • ” Why is it so hard for creative people to let the work breathe and let people interpret it?”

        well’ you invest your soul into a piece for hours, days, weeks, months to convey a certain message only to have some douche come along and totally not get it or worse yet reduce it into something trivial….which i guess speaks more for the artist than the viewer since you put forth all that effort and yet failed to get your point across which means you failed as an artist and human being and thus deserve all of the calamities that would befall you…..(o_O)

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  13. I’m not bougie but you struck a nerve. I maybe could have been a fashion designer, I might have made sure my realtor only showed me houses that had a potential sewing room/studio, that sewing room is currently a gym. After reading this post though, i do want to go to the fabric store on my lunch break. *pulls up online application for Project Runway* Oh they want a 6 month commitment. *closes laptop

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    • I just wish I could sew bc buying clothes is hard out here for a SallieMae indebted bougie girl. And my creativity/style is not always in season or my taste extends out of my price range….I mean really out of my price range; my taste isn’t even Bebe/Express/AmericanApparel but Marc Jacobs/French Connection/LAMB/Alice&Olivia/Elizabeth&James.

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      • My life revolved around the arts when I was younger. I was a dancer with a semi professional company and I was very intrigued by how clothing was made to fit and move with the body so that’s why I started making my own clothes. I loved the idea that it was art that you wore. Fast forward to college and although I still loved making clothing, I didn’t really have any significant time to devote to it. Now I have my corporate job, and even less time to devote to sketching and sewing etc. My accountant brain will calculate how many hours it will take me to finish a garment versus just going out and shopping for something and shopping always wins. Not for nothing, Marc Jacobs and Zac Posen make some pretty great wearable art.

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  14. I couldn’t identify with this post even though I love a good museum but only to walk around by myself and just look at nice paintings.

    I did go to a contemporary/modern classical set once. It was the worst thing that I had ever heard. The quintet hummed, whistled, clapped, played their string instruments and had a video in the background of a car crash. My friend and I eventually left and when we got outside, he tried to explain to me the significance of their pieces. I told him to hush and that what i just heard was garbage masked in the name of artistry.

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      • I wish i could find a video of what they did but Yoles, ma’am, when i tell you that my mouth completely dropped open…

        I couldn’t after 30 minutes. I looked at my friend and said “i’m ready to go.” We still laugh about it to this day.

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    • (smile) you just reminded me of a party i hosted a ways back. we had a Gen X rock star who was going to play live. i never cared for his music but my bosses cared about his fame so they gave him a set and for half an hour he played straight feedback in this tiny little spot, all glass and brick and concrete, sound bouncing off the walls. i walked out.

      i stood outside watching people leave my party in droves. i was nodding at them saying, “i would leave too but i have to stay til we close.”

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  15. It’s a sad thing the fact that most of the artists cannot practice their gift because of the lack of resources. That’s why people should help each other. Pay the musician to sing, and he’ll sing you with all his heart !

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  16. First, Champ, I have never wanted to do anything creative for a living. Never, ever, ever. Never did poetry, art, (fictional) writing, any of that. Even walked away from a potential journalistic career when people in college encouraged it. No, no, no, 1 billion times no. GTFOHWTBS.

    That said, people do say that they want such a career need more people. For one, a decent chunk of the people who say that don’t have the talent to pull it off, full stop. Some people just aren’t flat good enough, and in a lot of cases they can’t get good enough even if they have the work effort to put in an effort.

    The second thing is that doing anything creative for a living is a J-O-B. Yes, you aren’t working 9 to 5. However, the job isn’t sitting at home or at a coffee shop with a cup of organic, fair trade, locally sourced latte being creative. You have to meet with clients, agents, management, venue owners, publishers, etc. during the day. Also, since most of your customers will be people who work 9 to 5s, if you manage to blow up, you’ll have to be willing to sacrifice a non-trivial chunk of your weekends and evenings to work. While people see the artist at the stage or at the venue doing their thing, they don’t see the effort behind the scenes that even makes something like that possible.

    Three, there’s the fact that people are unwilling or unable to plan how exactly they’re going to get to a 9 to 5 to living their dream. There are ways to go part-way with a number of creative fields. You have to be willing to come up with a concrete plan, then have the discipline to execute. Even though I’m not doing anything “creative” in the slightest, I’m in the midst of pulling something like that off now. While you may end up going off script, with proper discipline, you can walk away from that particular plan while still laying the groundwork for what you want to do in the plan. The problem is that many people lack the ability to self-discipline and require the structure of a 9 to 5 to remain on task. Not that there’s anything wrong with that, but if that’s you, keep it real with yourself and shut up about your artistic dreams.

    Lastly, I have a problem with that because it reflects the bourgeois mindset present in all races that they are somehow “above” commerce. Ninja, cracker, (fill in appropriate ethnic slur here), GTFOHWTBS. I am a for-profit corporation. Cash rules everything around me. I’m out for dead f*cking presidents to represent me. If ain’t about dollars, then it don’t make sense. And whatever rap lines you can fill in there.

    That’s the reason I couldn’t f*ck with academic science. Instead of contributing to the Greater Knowledge Of Mankind ™, I wanted to help people using my scientific knowledge and, in the process, collect enough excess profits to make a Marxist sh*t themselves and maybe pop bottles with models in the process. Since I’ve found out popping bottles with models is actually boring as f*ck, I prefer to stick to the excess profits, but you get my point. There is nothing wrong with commerce legally or morally. I want to provide goods and services to people and get paid for it. It’s fine for me. I don’t need some “higher calling” to feel like I’m doing something worthwhile. And that people feel the need for that is reflective of a weakness in their mind and a form of self-hatred. There’s nothing so honorable as an honest day’s work for an honest day’s pay. That so many bougie types are above that and want someone to pay for their intellectual narcissism is scary.

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    • with all due respect, here in America art is a industry. it is about commerce first and foremost; if it weren’t everyone would be Henry Darger. but they’re not. they want to recognition and money while they are still alive.

      and it goes deeper than that, the dark reality is art is used to wash blood money clean. art is the only international industry that is completely unregulated.

      the powers that be are quite content to profit off art while shrouding it in the bullish veil of “art for art’s sake.” which has never been the truth about the creative process. “all art is propaganda” Orwell said, and i am inclined to believe him.

      the current propaganda may have you believe it is above capitalism, but it is not and has never been, unless, of course, you are a true outsider artist, in which case not only are you poor, but you live an anonymous existence free of the shackles of the bougie world, where the museum becomes mausoleum, and the people who walk through its halls rarely think twice about things like :: stolen antiquities; false attributions; forgeries; let alone the history of the museum itself. Rogues Gallery is a fascinating expose on the robber barons that built the Met.

      our perception of art is grounded in myth. that is how the powers-that-be keep it so that they can profit off arms trading, human trafficking, and the drug war. it’s deep.

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      • I like this response. And you’re right about the people who built the Met. I always found it funny that the 19th Century answer to Pablo Escobar (aka John Jacob Astor) built an art museum. I guess they didn’t have flossing and dookey rope chains back then. *kanyeshrug*

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        • dudes are all the same. the Vatican is the perfect example of power using art to control the minds of the masses while lining their pockets with blood money. i am sure Escobar’s art collection had some beauties that either got stolen or put back on the market, all with their papers “in tact” so that some arms dealer could buy it and wash his money tra la la.

          the museum is just the repository of thousands of years of political ploys. i cant stand museums. i hate seeing the way work is decontextualized to the point where its meaning is gone. an African mask behind a glass case is like a lion in a cage. there’s some kind of potent inhumanity that lurks in the heart of the powerful.

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      • all very right on time, Artnet just broke that “Untitled (Pecho/Oreja)”, a 1982 painting by Jean-Michel Basquiat, once owned by the rock band U2, sold tonight at Sotheby’s London for $10,666,951.

        Artnet does not say who the buyer is. Basquiat is a good investment, commodities being limited an all. in his life and his death, he continues to exploited by the art world. blood money, i tell you.

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    • What you’re saying is fundamentally true, and no one goes into business for charity, they go in it to get more than they put in. However, we’re a nation of dependent and obedient children.

      Most of us spend our lives in school, being told by people with little to no real life experiences what we’re supposed to know, how we’re supposed to think, and what we’re supposed to read – that’s what school is. We’re currently growing up in a world, where in order for you to have a decent life and career, you probably have to spend tens of thousands of dollars just to go into debt, when our current world and economy is surviving based on computers, which were created and are dominated by high-school and college drop-outs, who continue to cash-in while we waste our time doing what the status quo has programmed us to do.

      Our mindset is screwed up. We’ve been ritualized from childhood to be dumb and obedient, and it’s all been out of love from our teachers and our parents. We can’t deal with arguments, we can’t deal with conflicts in relationships. We can’t raise children or discipline them, so we drug them instead and rob them of their senses. We look as money as though it is something evil or something great, when it’s just really a tool of exchange. We’ve forgotten that the most important part of life and being an adult is being in control of your destiny and being able to rely on yourself; not on the government or some employer.

      So when you see an artist, asking or claiming that we as a society should pay for his/her art work or passion, realize that it’s not really their fault, they are a product of something that we all suffer from; yet even though they tend to feel that they are the most rebellious group of people in our culture, they are exactly the perfect result of the kind of people our culture aims to produce: dependents.

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      • “Our mindset is screwed up. We’ve been ritualized from childhood to be dumb and obedient, and it’s all been out of love from our teachers and our parents. We can’t deal with arguments, we can’t deal with conflicts in relationships. We can’t raise children or discipline them, so we drug them instead and rob them of their senses.”

        Very true.

        Sometimes I wonder if there was ever a time when people truly had sense. I’m starting to doubt the amount of common sense the average person has. Because it appears to me that all this nonsense didn’t start until the average person was more autonomy. I just find it interesting that your philosophy seems to boil down to “Think people! Stop acting like stupid sheep and take control of your own destiny.”…whereas mine is “Most people are sheep. Even Jesus referred to them as such. They’re never gonna stop doing what they’re told and think independently–otherwise they wouldn’t be sheep. So it’s the job of the people in charge to “encourage” the average person to make the right decisions.”

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        • But if you’re an independent thinking person, you realize the greatest mistake you can make is to assume that someone is telling you the truth or has your best interest at heart. The same bible says beware of “false prophets”, how are you to notice one if you simply choose to be a sheep or a zombie.

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          • But people would already have to be critical thinkers in order to determine who’s telling the truth from who’s telling lies. Which brings me to my point: most people aren’t independent thinkers…if they were, then why would they be so content to tow the line? Is blindly following the status quo a characteristic of a critical thinker?
            And if most people aren’t smart enough to think for themselves, isn’t it a mistake to give them increased power and autonomy over their own lives?

            “The same bible says beware of “false prophets”, how are you to notice one if you simply choose to be a sheep or a zombie.”

            A person doesn’t choose to be a sheep anymore than the next person chooses chooses to be a shepherd–they’re born that way. Take yourself for example. From the way you write on this blog, you seem to be a person who thinks deeply and critically about anything before you submit to it. Could you just stop doing that one day? Could you just stop yourself from thinking? I doubt it. Just as I doubt that people who don’t think are gonna wake up one morning thinking and coming to intelligent conclusions. They usually just wind up sounding like Tyrese

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            • Actually, I wasn’t born that way. I used to be like any other sheep, until I got out of college and started reading books on history, philosophy, economics, politics, entrepreneurship etc and decided rather than go to grad school and continue being told what I was supposed to know, I was going to study what I liked.

              I’m African, so you can already understand the pressure of having parents all on your back when you’re the one who is supposed to be going to Med-School and be the first Dr. in the family. However, the more I read the more I realized how suicidal that was (Innovation is going to continue to make medicine more expensive and a career in it more expensive, while salaries continue to go down even though the market continues to expand, only reason why Americans don’t know about this is because the AMA has been lobbying against new innovations being brought to the states in order for doctors to keep their relatively high salaries). I had always been a master at computers, hacking and finding things no one else could find on the internet, and I didn’t need to go near $500,000 in debt to do that, I just had to accept that my parents would be disappointed and mad…which they are, but it’s not their life to live.

              Being an adult requires that you “have” to live life for yourself. It doesn’t matter whether you choose it or not, if you choose not to live your life for yourself, you’re living life for other people as a dependent. And those other people are going to control you. And it’s not natural to want to be under control. Kids don’t want to be under control, that’s learned behavior. Just as being a sheep is learned behavior. It has to be taught, and it has to be accepted.

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              • …”it’s not natural to want to be under control.”

                For whom, though? It’s not natural for LEADERS and SHEPHERDS to want to be under control. They’re never truly content following the crowd. They question the logic and the sense behind rules, and decide for themselves whether or not they’ll follow them. But it’s perfectly reasonable and natural for a sheep to want to be under control–because they lack the ability to think for themselves AND the means to provide for and protect themselves. Release a sheep into the wild and voila, no more sheep. They don’t possess the skills to survive against predators and the effects of their innate stupidity. They need to be taken care of.

                I believe that most people are very much like sheep. They need leaders–people who will love (as an act of will), provide for, protect and take care of them. It sounds like you believe that if ordinary sheep decided that they were done being sheep then they could somehow change into something else. I wholeheartedly disagree. Surely you’ve seen a stupid, foolish person try to wax philosophical. It’s ridiculous. Lol.

                Once an ordinary sheep, always an ordinary sheep. But an extra-ordinary sheep, one who possesses the ability to evaluate nature rationally, can change into who they were always meant to be.

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                  • Social darwinists believe in survival of the fittest–that it’s natural and acceptable for the rich and powerful to exploit the poor and helpless. I believe in hierarchy, with people with sense and critical thinking skills at the top, and those without these skills at the bottom. Key difference between my beliefs and and Social Darwinism (AKA pure evil) is that those on the top should be responsible and kind to those on the bottom. It’s a “with great power comes great responsibility” type thing. Social darwinists believe in abusing their power and authority; I don’t.

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                    • But here’s the problem: much of Social Darwinism was scientific evidence of what Plato described in “The Republic.”

                      But history has shown us that even when the most benevolent people are put into positions of power they get corrupted and abuse it.

      • i agree with alla this. i like reading your thoughts codified into a larger thesis. i’m patiently awaiting the book you will write. or not. patience does not require preconceived results.

        the only thing to which i do not fully subscribe is the idea that (all) artists are dependents. the ones that enter the industry become part of the machine, yes, and they they are half coddled/half chewed up like the rest of us.

        but there will always be that very small sliver of folk who say ftw. i’ve met a few of them over the years, and i admire the way they walked away from seeming success in favor of maintaining their integrity.

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        • Nah I didn’t say artists are dependents. I just said that any artist that wants society to back them up while they pursue their art or creative pursuits is a dependent. And any form of true art requires an independent mind.

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          • thank you for the clarification. you did state this. i see now i was projecting my issues on to something that i wanted to refute, basically, in my own head.

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    • “Three, there’s the fact that people are unwilling or unable to plan how exactly they’re going to get to a 9 to 5 to living their dream.”

      Sometimes artistic folks just don’t have the ability to focus on making money. Basquiat comes to mind. If he had not become popular when he did he would have probably been just a really artistic homeless guy.

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  17. I’m not a BBP….I wanted to be an artist for 12 years (took art classes from 8-20) but my African parents would not hear of it :’(. Then again, I do have BBP tendencies like frequenting Thai restaurants.

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  18. I disagree with all this because of the notion that BBP would stand in line; free events usually have a line where I’m from. I’m not convinced that BBP love free sh*t. BBP believe you get what you pay for. Perhaps there’s a difference between urban bougie and country bougie…

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  19. Never wanted to be an “artist” or a “writer”. There is too much pretense in those titles and I would have to hold my nose while telling people what I do. I write some. I have some talent and some plans for the stuff I’ve written. Don’t expect to make much money off it, because I’m realistic. I’ve made some clothes and painted a few things. I’ve appreciated and bought art. But pretense makes me ill. So I stay far away from BBP events.

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    • i used to feel exactly the same way. i had a lot of hang ups about the words “artist” and “writer” because of what i had observed around me. only, after enough years in the industry, i couldnt go on without doing my thing. and though it took me some time i can finally use these words to describe myself without feel strange any more.

      i agree there is a lot of pretense. i often embody it. it’s difficult to negotiate the spaces of creativity and commerce without getting swallowed up and spit back out as half digested nonsense ..

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      • “it’s difficult to negotiate the spaces of creativity and commerce without getting swallowed up and spit back out as half digested nonsense…”

        That’s true. I think it’s because art is so subjective that people are afraid to say they don’t get it and then just pretend in order to go along with the crowd. Then the pretending becomes a habit hard to break.

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        • Girl, yes art is subjective, and open to interpretation.
          That’s why if you are an artiste and splash a mixture of paint on a canvass and call it the “Slavery War”, I have the right to state, “WTF, I’m just seeing a color struggle”.

          Abstract pieces are the most interesting/intriguing. The stories behind them will have your eyeballs falling out of their sockets.
          .

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      • i think labels can be aspirational. the issue can sometimes be that one uses them in order to manipulate perception (their own or others).

        i remember being at a b-girl panel and a dancer was raging about how novices call themselves b-girls without having earned it in her eyes.

        i get that. but i also get this. words trigger all kindsa issues. for me, the comfort level to describe myself as an artist and writer came when i felt at peace with the inner struggle that this work requires. it’s so unpleasant ! (giggle) God got jokes for me.

        now i dont care who calls them selves what. i am way more fascinated by words themselves, their strange powers and forms ~*~

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        • “…the comfort level to describe myself as an artist and writer came when i felt at peace with the inner struggle that this work requires.”

          Yep, that’s what I’m saying. Some people don’t do the work, they skip that step and just wear the label.

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  21. Hmm…I could have been a pilot, could have been a doctor…could have been a pimp, could have been a mobster, could have been a mack, could have been a dopeboy…homey matter of fact…I’m a motherf*cking cokeboy.

    I’m also a BBP at times. I’m a solid mix between bougie and unbougie. I’ve got tendencies all around. I’ve tried everything.

    Oh well. I keeps it thoro.

    Wha??

    PJ out.

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  22. As far the artist discussion goes: It’s easy to figure out which ones are the artists and people who have pretensions about being an artist. Artists work. They are ALWAYS working. They aren’t talking about working. They are always working. They have actually COMPLETED work. Have legit portfolios. Bougie people like to hang around people who are working and talk about how they’d like to work, but stuff excuses reasons business jobs etc. Not that that is a bad thing. Everyone doesn’t need to be an artist and it’s perfectly fine to entertain fantasies.

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    • “Everyone doesn’t need to be an artist and it’s perfectly fine to entertain fantasies.”

      I’m fine in knowing the powers that be didn’t sculpt me to be “artistically inclined”. I enjoy various art forms but I honestly know that was never my calling as a human.

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    • Yes, I have a friend who has been talking about doing photography for YEARS. I told her straight up… 1.) You are not couch surfing at my place. 2.) If it don’t make money, it don’t make sense. 3.) If people are not seeking you out to take their picture… it’s a hobby… not a profession.

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  23. so what is a regular black person?

    i can relate to much of this post but i’ve never considered myself bougie. i actually think it’s a ridiculous word. lol. but anyhoo.

    encourage your friend’s dreams and talents. there’s a huge space between starving artist and being Kanye, where bills are paid and thriving lives are lived everyday.

    good post.

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    • A regular Black is a person who is confortable in their own skin and doesn’t have to advertise to anyone. BBP have taken a bad rep because the Ghetto Fabulous who decided they were BBP when they weren’t. I sure you know that you can take some out of the Ghetto, but you can’t take the Ghetto out of them.

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  24. Whatever is regarded as bougie, I know for sure, I’ve never done the whole “free” art/music/stage concept. That’s saying a lot as a New Yorker.

    I will however, blow the fawk out of some Groupons, especially for comedy show tickets.

    Anyway, I have a special hate for hipsters and bougie folks, but in the end, whatever they stand for, all people need to find themselves. Who am I to judge them and say who or what they should be? Not my place.

    Maybe I say that, because I have an inner artist in me, and I can see where that narcassim can come from. But it only worked when I was deeply depressed. Once I got “better”…all my good stuff went away. Clearly I need a drug habit to get it back.

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    • @Rewind – lol at the groupons….I feel you though…”Once I got “better”…all my good stuff went away. Clearly I need a drug habit to get it back.”…..I’ve talked to some people that have gone through something like this and they said that they felt like all of this creativity was pouring out of them and then when they “got better” it just wasn’t the same…

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      • There’s something about pain and adversity that sets your soul on fire. It just aches to reveal itself of pain. But once you get rid of the pain, the screaming stops. That’s why I believe most musicians who are on drugs end up releasing their best material. It goes back to that line “a drunk mind speaks a sober tongue”. All inhibitions go away and you let yourself free when that pain rules your life, but you have no reason to fight so hard once the pain is gone.

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        • hmm. i hear you but i am not sure. i couldnt begin to write so long as my life was a lie, but when my life was a lie i was in the worst pain of all.

          once i began to be honest, it was gruesome, ugh, yuck, but it definitely wasnt more painful than the darkest years.

          now, for me, the issue is going back into the wound. i’ve found some kind of emotional equilibrium for the first time n my life. and part of me fears this is a fragile state so it impacts my writing because i am worried those demons might drag me back.

          or maybe the truth is, i just dont want to be in more pain. i am not sure. one of these is a cop out. time will tell ..

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          • Truthfully, I’m at that place myself, where I know I’m better off than I used to be, but I am nowhere satisfied with where my life is now. Part of me appreciates what I have, the other half in a huge funk..so I’m trying to motivate myself to turn that frustration into fuel. Like you said, some of the answers feel like a cop out when you try to figure out why you feel the way you feel, but at least you can tell the truth now, as opposed to how it used to be.

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    • It’s interesting you were mentioning hipsters, as they came to mind when Ed Koch passed, and I thought about how New York had changed from his era to now. The biggest difference to me is the rise of the hipster. The biggest part of it is that you have these people who grew up in without a true sense of culture or ethnicity shamelessly pilfering from everyone else in America in the guise of “authenticity”. However, I also realized that a big part of it is that towards the end of the Giuliani administration they started moving into the city after it was cleaned up, then turned around and claimed “authentic” New York roots by living in “gritty” neighborhoods they have nothing to do with cleaning up. Their lack of ability of create their own persona is grating to me.

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        • You’re right, but it seems even worse. At least imperialism was a solution to actual problems going on in Europe. Not saying that it’s good, but I could reasonably foresee any other group in history in those situations making similar decisions. This hipster crap is pure ego, single barrel with branch water ice cubes, frozen tumbler glasses and expensive chocolate squares on the side.

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          • mmm i dont know if it is worse. it’s a new kinda ugly. it is the ugliness of civilization, rather than the barbarism of righteousness.

            i have known hipsters through default, and the common ground i see with them is the spoils of white privilege, which is this conformity to non-conformity bougie liberal thought.

            it’s not just cultural imperialism though, it is also this: hipsters literally move into and take over neighborhoods like their brethren did around the globe centuries ago.

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      • I’ve realized that myself. We all know what Williamsburg looked like 15 years ago. To see the transformation is a reminder how certain kinds of animals have the ability to wait out the death of bigger animals, then take over their homes. Its not like I want the old NY back where I could get a knife in the neck for some Jordans,, but this hipster version of NY where everything is shiny and fake brings into mind that hard work doesn’t belong to a person who actually did it, it can be stolen by someone who was never there. That is why NY scares me now. Nothing is what it seems

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        • mm ima say this is New York as it has always been.

          i lived in the West Village for 15 years and realized it then. read Edith Wharton and discover once upon a time it was a slum, then the artists and gays came to create a bohemia, that was eventually bougiefied by all the cultural imperialists who bought property when it was affordable.

          now that neighborhood is ridiculous, but still people think The Village has some kind of cache. same will be true for Wburg in 50 years.

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          • I guess you’re right. Most of NYC looked horrible if you ever seen the turn of the century pictures. Even Harlem, when it was the home of the Black Revolutionaries looked like crap before they got there.

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    • I’ve never understood the hate for hipsters. Rewind, explain to me, why?

      I just see them as free spirits with a lot of mambo jambo going on in their heads, nothing too serious that should warrant hate or even any negative energy.

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      • I can’t speak for others, but here in NY, their presence causes problems. They make up bullshyte reasons to be mad, and cause protests and lawsuits that hinder progress for things that aren’t a big deal. They entice home owners in low income areas to change things around, so they can dip into that trust fund money and move in the area, upheaving all the citizens who have lived there for years, and can’t afford the price hike. And personally, I just hate pretentious douchebags. As long as they don’t talk to me, I’m fine, but when they bring their arrogant, head in the clouds nonesense to me (and I guess this is from seeing it in college), it makes me angry that as hard as I worked for everything I have, they could edge me out based on nothing but the life someone else gave them.

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  25. As I was reading I couldn’t help but realize I fit most of this. Here I thought I was thinking out of the box using random art institute showcases and relatively unknown blues and jazz singers weekly club performances as fodder for easy first date situations. Turns out I’m just like this whole class of BBP. One of my favorite date restaurants is a cafe inside a museum. Next you’ll be telling me I make it worse by smoking cigars and drinking bourbon. Or that my side projects of poetry, short stories, and novels are so far in this wheelhouse I need some kind of BBP detox program. I pretty much signed up for this when I decided to go to law school didn’t I?

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    • RW…it’s all good….I enjoy a restaurant in a museum and a nice cigar (with gin) every now & again myself…keep doin’ what you do…

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  26. Does this count as a hard and fast test for BBP status? If so, I guess I’m officially not. For my litmus, I usually go for the W-WAM test or the modified W-WIP (What Would an Asian Mom do/What Would Immigrant parents do) test to see if something is bougie.

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  27. @ Negro Libre

    Reply button is gone again.

    “But history has shown us that even when the most benevolent people are put into positions of power they get corrupted and abuse it.”

    Yeah…but whenever a government is corrupt, it can be reformed if the people revolt. Maybe not immediately, but eventually. Throughout history, whenever people in charge abused their power, the people revolted because they weren’t doing right by them. It was, in a sense, a check and balance type of thing.
    I guess it ultimately boils down to which one is the worst of the two evils: Giving dumb people power and autonomy over themselves and watching society inevitably burn; or giving sensible people power over the non-sensible and count the days until they abuse their power.

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    • But the fact that you admitted that people do revolt when people in power are corrupt shows you that you don’t believe the vast majority of people are completely sheep lol. Sheep are gentle; when have you ever heard of a mutiny of sheep?

      The fact of the matter is there has never been a society where people have been left to pursue their own autonomy. For thousands of years, the elite have always believed just what you believe and have tried to prevent that from ever happening because of all the chaos they think will occur. Why do you think our educational system is so bad, yet our economy is so good – don’t you think corporate America enjoys dumbing us down and preventing competition from ever coming about?

      Trust me, a lot of the stupidity that you see is planned, and was created by design. The dumber and less faith humans have in each other, the less likely they are to rebel and overthrow the corrupt leaders who stay in power from one generation to the next. As long as you have a belief and most people have a belief that they are the chosen few to lead over the dumb masses, those who actually hold the power and know the real score will continue to look down on us while we try to fight each other for the last piece of the pie.

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      • “Sheep are gentle; when have you ever heard of a mutiny of sheep?”

        Lol…hilarious :) I’m sitting here envisioning a bunch of sheep getting their a$@*^# handed to them by wolves.

        “As long as you have a belief and most people have a belief that they are the chosen few to lead over the dumb masses, those who actually hold the power and know the real score will continue to look down on us while we try to fight each other for the last piece of the pie.”

        Hmmm…you make a good point. I’ve never considered that before…I’m part of the problem. People like you have much more faith in humanity compared to people like me. I’m just trying to understand how. How are you able to look at the nonsense that surrounds you and still have a high opinion of people? Please, tell me your secret…

        *sigh*

        Thank you for indulging me, Negro Libre. I realize I must have come across as incredibly arrogant today. It’s not that I think that people aren’t worth anything, it’s just that I was speaking with no filter.

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        • Go read the Underground History of American Education by John Taylor Gatto or listen to the audiobook via unwelcomeguests.net, and see if you won’t have a strong faith in humanity afterwards.

          Or just youtube Ultimate History Lesson and watch the guy talk about education and how it works in America and see if your whole view on human nature and stupidity doesn’t change after you’re done.

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  28. Speaking of things Bourgie black people love, I just discovered this video, courtesy of #BourgieTwitter http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CNM0ha87eU0

    But to continue Esa’s point about ‘the love of art,’ peep Goapele’s song “For Love” at 4:50. It may not be new, but it’s my first time hearing it. Lyrics are for you artists – it’s about giving up your good job for the love of your art.

    Anyway, back to ignoring the Dorner updates…

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  29. Pingback: Push and Kick: The Art Of Nathan Jalani Taylor | From Ashy to Classy

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