Lists, Pop Culture, Race & Politics

Separate, But Equal For The Greater Good!

Emo is also know as Marvin's Room.

Separate, but equal.

Such powerful words. They created the basis for Jim Crow and laundromats. And zoos. Definitely zoos. Well over time I’ve come to learn that with all of the progress we’ve made with integration (whether or not integration was a good thing is rightfully debatable), that while being able to drink from the same drinking fountain f*cking rocks, there are some instances where perhaps, separate, but equal just might be better. In some ways, thats the premise that the Black Panthers were working with. Allow our communities to police ourselves because we couldn’t trust the power structure as it was to justly address the issues of our community.

Then came crack.

Moving on. The point is, all segregation isn’t a bad thing. I hear you looking at me with odd trepidation. I would be too. But trust me, I’ve recently discovered some areas where perhaps segregation might be beneficial to all parties involved. Eli Porter face. I did that.

And thiiiiiiiiis is where this post takes the turn towards, huh? what? Just keep swimming.

While I have you completely baffled about what direction I’m going, here is a list of things where segregation might be best for us all.

1. Hip-hop dance class

To most white people, all Black people have rhythm, can sing and dance, and are great at basketball. And I, for one, am completely okay with that stereotype. We’re the purveyors of cool. I think white and Black people have come to a comfortable understanding and acceptance that we’ve got this entertainment thing on lock. So imagine just how disappointing (and upsetting) it would be if the Black chick in the hip-hop dance class sucked at dancing. Hell, I’d be disappointed and I KNOW all Black people can’t dance. Plus, Black people wouldn’t be subject to being taught “Black culture” by white teachers who call themselves things like DJ Scriggety Scratch who start all classes by saying “peace” forcing us to want to jackslap and mollywop somebody to make penance for the blatant disrespect of our culture. Or something. Point is, segregated hip-hop dance class is a win for everybody. Khaled.

2. Any establishment that serves soul food

As we’ve said plenty of times on this here site, down South, Black and white people pretty much eat the same sh*t. Hell, back in slavery days, we were the ones cooking for massa and ‘nem so it makes sense that on Thanksgiving day in the South, everybody’s eating the same thing (with the exception of the large Hispanic population who are likely NOT eating hogmaws). Do you know how difficult it is for some Black people to eat chicken AND/OR watermelon in front of white people? I know people who refuse to do so as to not be stereotypical. Well, if we mandated segregated soul food eating then we, the Black people, could be free to eat our stereotypical food in peace while they, the white people, could be free to eat the most bland deviled eggs of all time without worrying about anybody trying to put paprika on them. Everybody wins.

3. The movies

Hear me out. This kind of probably happens already anyway depending on the movie. But if there’s one place where stereotypes get reinforced, its the movie theater. Word.Life. Ninjas do hoodrat things with their friends at the movies. And I assume white people do too. We just tend to be a little more auditory. I remember going to see Bamboozled when it came out in Atlanta and much to my surprise there was a very mixed crowd. Well, we talked through the whole damn movie. Amenning it up. Yelling and booing at the screen. I’m fairly positive that the nice white people didn’t hear half the movie because I know that I didn’t hear half the movie. Picture a Tyler Perry movie experience on opening weekend. Well if we separate, but equate that joint then white people can watch in silence and Black folks can ham it up in loudence…THEN wait for the DVD to come out and purchase that joint ENSURING that Black movies continue to get made since the main reason why so many Black movies can’t get the green-light is because the majority of money made on Black movies comes from DVD sales. If we ain’t buying, they ain’t making. Word to big bird. Again, everybody wins. White folks pay upfront and we take it in the rear. Sounds like life, eh?

4. Men’s bathrooms for Drake fans and for non-Drake fans

In one, there are urinals and stalls. In the other, there are only stalls. I’ll let you assign them accordingly.

Those are just a few examples of places that logically might make sense to segregate, if ya know what I mean, for the greater good. Good people of VSB, got anything else???

Talk to me.

-VSB P aka THE ARSONIST aka MR. I’M NOT THAT SENSITIVE aka GIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIRL HE A 3

Filed Under: ,
Damon Young

Panama Jackson is pretty fly for a light guy. He used to ship his frito to Tito in the District, but shipping prices increased so he moved there to save money. When he's not saving humanity with his words or making music with his mouth, you can find him at your mama's mama's house drinking her fine liquors. Most importantly, he believes the children are our future.

  • Amos Banks

    Bamboozled and Bedazzled were at the movies at the same time and I KNOW a few folks got them mixed up and went in the wrong theater. Just sayin’…

    • A Woman’s Eyes

      Hilarity

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

      LOL. I’m fairly sure that at my theater, the nice white people were trying to see Bamboozled.

      They got Bamboozled if they thought they were going to watch that in silence, fool…silence. (Dragonfly Jones voice)

      • A Woman’s Eyes

        Not Dragonfly Jones ROTFL

  • https://twitter.com/#!/mackaroto Jay

    LOL. Did dude just strikethrough a whole paragraph?? Thats gotta be some kind of record.

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

      I didn’t think it was relevant.

      • http://reddoordigital.com ulysses

        You were wrong, this is important to note.
        But we understand it to be a bit insensitive to the overly sensitive. Or something like that

  • http://www.iamyourpeople.com I Am Your People

    5. Haircare aisles. Of course.

    • CurlyTop

      And hair salons that speacialize in “natural hair”

      • http://afrikanmami.blogspot.com African Mami

        and salons that specialize only on bongo dreads! For those that don’t know, bongo dreads are those locks that look like tree stumps growing out yo damn head! they are unsightly, ungodly and a whole lotta wat the fuggers! They therefore need, their own place for treatment!

        • A Woman’s Eyes

          No they don’t need separation from the natural hair products aisle. Even those dreads must be cleaned and conditioned like every other natural hair. The end.

          • http://afrikanmami.blogspot.com African Mami

            @ AWE,

            I say it’s the beginning….I was just joking…damn!

            • A Woman’s Eyes

              LMAO
              I like your humor!
              ROTFL

        • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

          you said bongo dreads.

          i laughed.

      • YeahSo

        I thought those were segregated.

    • http://pinchmycheekie.wordpress.com Cheekie

      Of course. Walgreens and CVS swag. lol

      • http://pinchmycheekie.wordpress.com Cheekie

        Oh wait… we just have the ethnic section at the end of the aisle. Like the back of the bus. It’s true. EVERY one of em be at the end. Conspiracy!!!!!

        *falls out*

        • A Woman’s Eyes

          I would stay away from that mess. Team Oyin Handmade

          • http://pinchmycheekie.wordpress.com Cheekie

            I LOVE Oyin. But I also effs with Shea Moisture which is at drugstores now. But it’s a Target for cheaper. #teamtarget. LOL

            • A Woman’s Eyes

              Shea Moisture is a great product, yes! I forgot it is at CVS. Yes its at Target!

  • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M5FR1LGsT7E TheAnti-Cool

    I agree about that hip-hop dance class cause I would be that black girl Elaineing it up and shaming each and every one of my people.

    Oh, and it’s my birthday. I demand that Yoles make me a fancy comment for everyone to co-sign. That is all. :)

    • Iceprincess

      Hap-py birthday to ya. *stevey wonder voice*

      • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M5FR1LGsT7E TheAnti-Cool

        :cool:

    • That Ugly Kid

      You have just received a Happy Birthday from That Ugly Kid aka Big D*ck Thugums aka Womb Wrecker Wesley aka Dougie: The Sequel aka The Heterosexual Bruno Mars. Rejoice.

      • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M5FR1LGsT7E TheAnti-Cool

        Rejoicing as I type.

    • CurlyTop

      Happy Birthday!!!! May you have a wonderful anti-cool day

      #TeamAries

      • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M5FR1LGsT7E TheAnti-Cool

        Thank you.

        #TeamAries

    • Justmetheguy

      Happy B-day TAC, VSB’s most prominent (and reasonable) contrarian lol

      • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M5FR1LGsT7E TheAnti-Cool

        Aw shucks. :)

    • http://runningwithhumans.blogspot.com/ dimaati

      Happy Birthday!!!!

      • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M5FR1LGsT7E TheAnti-Cool

        Thank you.

    • Geneva Girl

      Happy birthday!!! Don’t know you from boo, but I still want you to have a wonderful day.

      • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M5FR1LGsT7E TheAnti-Cool

        Thanks. You have a wonderful day too.

    • Sigma_Since 93

      Happy Birthday TAC! Bring the new avi back :D

      • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M5FR1LGsT7E TheAnti-Cool

        Thanks. Okay, I will.

        • Sigma_Since 93

          Yeah!!! *throws confeti in the air*

          • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M5FR1LGsT7E TheAnti-Cool

            Making me work for my b-day confetti. Hmph.

            • Sigma_Since 93

              Lub U TAC! :D

    • Keisha

      hApPy BiRtHdAy!!! Have a good one! :-)

      • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M5FR1LGsT7E TheAnti-Cool

        Thanks. I’ll try.

    • Breezy

      *flings birfday glittah*

      Happy Birthday TAC!

      • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M5FR1LGsT7E TheAnti-Cool

        Glittah! Yay! Thank you. :D

    • A Woman’s Eyes

      ~*~*~ HAPPY BIRTHDAY THE ANTI-COOL ~*~*~

    • http://pervertedalchemist.blogspot.com/ Perverted Alchemist

      Happy born day…you don’t look a day over 35…I kid, I kid LMAO!!!!

      • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M5FR1LGsT7E TheAnti-Cool

        Thank you. I’d better not since I’m only 31. lol

    • http://fourpageletter.wordpress.com keisha brown

      *waits for yolie…
      *gets impatient.

      *flings my own damn glitter at ya. LOL.
      happy bday TAC.

      • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M5FR1LGsT7E TheAnti-Cool

        Glitter from Canada is like glitter from heaven. Thanks!

        • http://fourpageletter.wordpress.com keisha brown

          LMFAOOOOO
          this. totally. made. my. day. even though it’s YOUR day.

          • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M5FR1LGsT7E TheAnti-Cool

            I like to spread the happy around. :D

    • Yoles

      5, 6, 5678❣ ♫♪♬ It’s somebody’s birthday, It’s somebody’s birthday, who’s birthday is it? It’s YOURS❣, who’s birthday is it? It’s YOURS❣ ♫♪♬♥✰
      ♡

      Wishing you a beautiful ❁✵BORNDAY❁✵
      Sending you nothing but good vibes on this your ♚❤EARTHSTRONG❤♚
      Hoping you receive everything you want (& need) for your ∞⍣BIRTH-A-VERSARY⍣∞

      Happy Annual Uterine Exit Day TheAnti Cool!!!!!!

      • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M5FR1LGsT7E TheAnti-Cool

        WOOT! WOOT!

        (does an awkward happy dance)

      • Namia

        Awww…nice happy Bd TAC

    • http://www.styleillusions.com WIP

      happy birthday!

      • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M5FR1LGsT7E TheAnti-Cool

        Thank you!

    • StillSuga

      Happy Birthday!! May the mild sauce be on point today, just for you!

      • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M5FR1LGsT7E TheAnti-Cool

        Thanks! lol

    • http://pinchmycheekie.wordpress.com Cheekie

      Happy Birfday, Anti-Cool? Are you like, anti Anti-Cool today since it’s yo special day?

      • http://pinchmycheekie.wordpress.com Cheekie

        Wait. Why did I make your birfday greeting a question? Lemme just cover it up by flinging cool confetti… *flings with fervor*

        • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M5FR1LGsT7E TheAnti-Cool

          Fervored flinging is the best kind of flinging. Thank you.

          As for your question, don’t be making me think hard on my birfday.

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

      you embarass me. you embarass yourself. (terrence howard voice)

      Happy birthday!

      • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M5FR1LGsT7E TheAnti-Cool

        Thanks Peej.

        Btw, I’m following/stalking you on tha Twittah now. #ChurchtheMovie

        • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

          welcome to the fun.

          so that was you.

          and NEVER watch that sh*t.

          • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M5FR1LGsT7E TheAnti-Cool

            You know the more you tell me not to watch the more determined I will be to see it for myself.

            It has random musical numbers and a woman in a wheelchair getting pimp slapped. How can I not watch this?

            • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

              don’t do it. reconsider. read some literature.

    • nillalatte

      Happy Birthday TAC!!! Have a blessed and wonderful day! Eat lots of cake and ice cream at Chuck E Cheese ’cause that’s where a kid can be a kid… in addition to VSB. LOL ;)

      • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M5FR1LGsT7E TheAnti-Cool

        Thank you! But I loathe Chuck E Cheese. Can we go to Toys ‘R Us instead?

        • nillalatte

          Absolutely! It’s YOUR birthday! :)

    • http://wildcougarconfessions.com Wild Cougar

      Happy Birthday TAC!!!!!

      • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M5FR1LGsT7E TheAnti-Cool

        Thanks!

    • http://uphereoncloud9.wordpress.com Wu Young, Agent of M.E.

      Happy Birthday!

    • Cheech

      Happy Birthday!!!! Although it is a weekday, there is no reason not to go H.A.M (apologies if this phrase should not be resurrected)

      • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M5FR1LGsT7E TheAnti-Cool

        I very rarely go H.A.M. I do go B.A.C.O.N. occasionally.

    • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M5FR1LGsT7E TheAnti-Cool

      @A Woman’s Eyes & Wu

      For some reason I can’t reply y’all directly but I wanted to say thanks for the happy birthdays. :D

    • Sandpaper

      Happy Birthday!

      • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M5FR1LGsT7E TheAnti-Cool

        Thank you very much!

    • YeahSo

      Happy B-day TA-C!!

      • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M5FR1LGsT7E TheAnti-Cool

        Thanks so much!

    • http://asiyah3.wordpress.com Asiyah

      ¡Feliz Cumpleaños, Chica!

      • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M5FR1LGsT7E TheAnti-Cool

        Gracias! <—My 4th grade Spanish at work.

        • http://asiyah3.wordpress.com Asiyah

          4th grade Spanish is better than no Spanish lol

    • jazzylia

      i knew there was a reason I fancied TAC’s comments…

      #teamAriesSTANDUP

      Happy Birthday! :)

      • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M5FR1LGsT7E TheAnti-Cool

        Thanks!

        #AriesRunTheWorld

    • http://eatreadrant-nadette.blogspot.com Nadette@Eat, Read, Rant!

      It’s your birthday, and you can shame us today (and today only) if you want to. Just blame it on the al-al-alcohol!
      #teamaries

      • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M5FR1LGsT7E TheAnti-Cool

        I don’t drank though. Have a few for me please.

  • Iceprincess

    At church. Oh my bad, they already doing that for the most part. Lmao

    • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M5FR1LGsT7E TheAnti-Cool

      2520 churches are so quiet. You can actually get a decent Sunday nap in one of them.

      • mena

        No nap required when you are in and out in under 2 hrs.

        • naturalista88

          *Lol*, true. Maybe my previous church is different cause service is @ 11 and over by 1, unless there was something special going on that day.

          • http://www.iamyourpeople.com I Am Your People

            There’s nothing like having a pastor who loves football, specifically when he has tickets to the 1:15 game that’s a 40 minute drive away. #winning

        • Todd

          2 hours? What kind of White churches you been to? I used to go to one, and I was usually out in an hour. :)

          • http://pervertedalchemist.blogspot.com/ Perverted Alchemist

            Let me guess…it was a Catholic church wasn’t it???

            • Todd

              The correct answer is…Unitarian! :) Now if I could only find a church that shared my beliefs AND isn’t boring. ROTFLMAO

            • Meisarebel

              And that my friend, is the beauty of being Roman Catholic. :-)

              I honestly never got why people need to be in church for ten hours, break for lunch, then head back to church for another 15…

              • A Woman’s Eyes

                break for lunch? and I was raised Southern Baptist before I exiled myself.

                • Meisarebel

                  First time I went to a Methodist church in DC we dead a$$ had a break for lunch.

                  Not hating, just saying it was a serious culture shock.

                  • A Woman’s Eyes

                    Errumm my mother is Methodist and that’s the first I ever heard of that! lol

                    I wouldn’t come back after lunch. That’s just too much for me. I’d be sweaty, exhausted, hungry, needing a nap by then.

                    • Meisarebel

                      Exactly.

                      Could’ve just been that particular church. I dunno. What I do know is I never went to ant AME church after that experience. I’m already sceptical about my own religion. And I have faith in it. Don’t need any more confusing me.

          • Mena

            Episcopal. Sunday school, service, communion, and after church cookies and coffee. 2 hrs.

          • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

            that’s what i’m screaming.

            i went to a white church once and by the time i got comfortable and ready to settle in folks were benedicting and trying to roll out.

            • YeahSo

              Lol… I can so see this happening.

      • erika

        They do have some live services but something about them speaking in tongues and falling out with the holy ghost should be deemed signs of the apocalypse.

    • http://wildcougarconfessions.com Wild Cougar

      Cosign. Churches can remain segregated. Cause people who like to dress in big hats, then jump up and down, throw handkerchiefs, bang tambourines, take their shoes off, run up and down the aisles, jerk madly, knock pews to the side while they speak in tongues, and roll on the floor, all to a lively but repetitive organ tune should be able to do so without white people (or boring snobbbish black people) gawking at them.

      HMPH!

      • Meisarebel

        This made me smile.

        Meh, I’ll take my hour and a half church service and be out. :-P

      • Kema

        This is funny because I go to a mixed pentecostal church with a white pastor. The first time I saw white women jumping up and down hollering I went into shock. 0_0

    • MJoy

      I actually go to a very diverse Church and I love it.

      It’s pretty much a black church but ya know…with other races.

  • That Ugly Kid

    Eh, Drake jokes are getting kinda old. I find it interesting that a lot of men are so uncomfortable with their own sexuality that they care so much about Drake’s apparent “softness”. He makes better music than anyone not named Eminem, Jay-Z, and Kanye West. But, people can’t just enjoy the music nowadays, they always trying to find another thing to scrutinize the kid (like him squatting in GQ magazine).

    And why is being emo considered a bad thing? Last time I checked, music was supposed to be emotional. It helps the listener get into the song by drawing out their own emotions. The listener is supposed to feel the pain, the sadness, the anger, etc. Don’t know, maybe’s just me using logic.

    • Iceprincess

      Puh-leez! Drake aint even better than lupe fiasco! Dang, chicago, you supposed to know that. You disappointing me lol.

      • That Ugly Kid

        I would’ve put Lupe on the list. If he didn’t make Lssers.

        • That Ugly Kid

          Lasers*

          • http://voodoochile88.tumblr.com/ Craig and Dem

            TUK you need to preach Lupe’s 1st two albums tho kinfolk, CLASSICS still bump them til this day! But Lasers. . . . . .(insert the worst insult you can think of) <–Cuz that's exactly what it was.

            • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

              can’t call them classics b/c the boy sucks at picking beats. THEN he made Lasers.

              brilliance doesn’t equate to classic albums.

    • http://afrikanmami.blogspot.com African Mami

      cottamn! u mean to tell me that boy was all up in a GQ magazine posing like he about to shid bricks?! Nothing is more unsexier to me, than a man:
      1.) Who I know speaks good English, but chooses to dumb it down. I’ve been following Drake’s career, ever since he was a nothing, and was doing ad placements on Trey Songz song’s when he too was a nothing

      2.) You can be emo, but it can’t be you are Tony Braxton emo-always having your heart being broken…I don’t care, what anybody says but I rather like to think that my man is in control!

      3.) Wassssssss guddddd?! I’m WATCHING you!!! *wink wink*

      • That Ugly Kid

        1. Lol, yea. He was squating in a picture and guys everywhere tried to compare it the infamous Lil Kim and Nicki Minaj squat pictures. Saying that he’s gay or that he should’ve taken a knee. Anyone who’s ever worn a suit more than once knows if you must kneel, you have to squat. Taking a knee dirties and messes up the material in your slacks.

        2. I’d feel even better about your watching me if I knew the intent behind it. As long as you aren’t trying to harm me, I will continue to get undressed in front of my bedroom window. Enjoy the show.

    • mena

      Agreed. Men throw shade at Drake but will be the first to know all of his songs by heart. It’s jealousy. How dare this black man show us (black men) as being vulnerable?

      • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

        i will throw shots AND listen to his music if i so chose. lol.

        honestly, guys don’t take issue with songs like “look what you’ve done” b/c that joint is real and thorough and open and honest without simping.

        thing is, women ALSO don’t like dudes simpin’ out like on Marvin’s Room but want to give Drake credit for being open and honest. he’s doing his thing, and he’s successful. but let’s be real, and i wrote about it, it makes us all a bit uncomfortable. lol.

        • http://wildcougarconfessions.com Wild Cougar

          Wrong! I like it, I love it, I want somore of it! Tell me youre dying inside every minute you’re away from me. Go on….

          • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

            really? that wouldn’t get old?

            • Mena

              If it is sincere and you are feeling the person then no, it doesnt get old. You have said it yourself, when you truly care and like someone then that person can be under you (not in the chexual way) and you would love it.

              • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

                but that’s the thing with Drake music…its all breakup songs. none of it is about being IN a relationship.

                • http://wildcougarconfessions.com Wild Cougar

                  I don’t care if we broke up. I got a big ego. It needs maintenance.

                  • YeahSo

                    I just wanted to see how small this box would get.

                    • YeahSo

                      oh.

                    • Kema

                      lol!

    • Kicksngiggles

      I agree. It amuses me when other rappers attack Drake for being soft. I thought Hip Hop/Rap was about telling your story, and like all music, expressing yourself. They want the right to rap about their real life experiences, violence, and other subjects that some may deem inappropriate; however, they don’t want Drake to tell his story or divulge his feelings. So ridiculous.

      • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

        violence is real hiphop.

        • A Woman’s Eyes

          and poverty was original hip hop

          Everytime I see Drake, his weird lips distract me, especially after a woman stated in a magazine that he has excellent peach eating skills.

    • http://moacn.wordpress.com Sir Fariku

      +1

      you know what, I like “real” hip hop like anyone else I just appreciate the variety of hip hop, I cant be serious and listen to ish about empowering myself all day, some times you want to party, other times you want be ign’ant, other times you want to act a fool while sometimes a brother just wants to be emo.

      Half the people criticizing Drake know the lyrics to “The Motto”, Lets put the Drake hating aside, hold hands and sing YOLO. lol.

      As for segregating places, As a black man who kinda sucks at basketball. (Not my fault, I m foreign, got mad soccer skills) I really dont like when I go to play basketball and get picked because I am presumed to be good. Darn shame too. Hypocritically I always give black people who cant dance a side-eye. How hard is it to do the two step? Like really?

      • That Ugly Kid

        See, in the African-American rulebook “Living Up To Your Blackness” as a male, not being good at basketball is okay as long as you’re good at a substitute sport. Yours is Soccer. Maseltov (no I do not feel like googling how to spell that word)

        • http://moacn.wordpress.com Sir Fariku

          Mazel Tov, lol. You slacking on your Kosher language son.

      • http://afrikanmami.blogspot.com African Mami

        @ Sir Fariku

        THE only Drake song I know that exists is replacement girl, I wouldn’t even tell you how the lyrics begin and end. My criticism is real not feigned!

        • http://moacn.wordpress.com Sir Fariku

          Fair enough cant argue with that.

      • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

        Drake bodies “The Motto” though. you know what i think it really is with Drake.

        he’s TOO extreme. ‘Pac operated in the extremes but none of it seemed TOO contradictory. i don’t understand how Drake can catch a body while he’s busy on the phone crying to an ex about losing her. lol.

        again, i’m okay with Drake. he’s keeping lightskint dudes in the convo.

    • Maximillian

      I’m sorry, I cannot respect a man whose favorite drink is a White Wine Spritzer.

      • That Ugly Kid

        As he explained on Chesley Lately, it’s his favorite drink because when he was 15 years old, an attractive older woman used to always pour a glass then slide it to him on the low in a flirtatious manner. It reminds him of her.

        • Todd

          Hmmm…that explains his entire verse on the remix of Fabolous’ “Throw it in the Bag” To wit:

          Uhh Ahhh,
          We up in Barneys going dumb again,
          Every time we leave the manager say come again,
          honestly shes prol old enough to be my momma’s friend,
          she just want that feeling back, I make her feel young again,
          if the card declined you need to check that sh-t and run again,
          they don’t give you limits when you keep that money coming in,
          yeah, just fold some paper round the magnet,
          as soon as it approve you can throw it in the bag,
          [Courtesy of KillerHipHop.com]
          she mature to say the least,
          and if I get a car she make sure to pay the lease,
          she used to have a husband until she found out that he cheats,
          then she filed for divorce and watched that bank account increase,
          she got a condo with a view, a house with a pool,
          her son is 26 but he just went away to school,
          she always show me pictures of him, tell me thats her baby,
          i hope that i never meet him, that n-gga look craaaazy,
          and I be spending all my lady chips,
          she got me feeling like my daddy back in 86,
          yeah, she say that she lucky that she his,
          no, I m lucky that you mine baby, you know what it issssss.

        • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

          you know…that’s hilarious, right?

          • A Woman’s Eyes

            Yes it is LMAO

    • http://pervertedalchemist.blogspot.com/ Perverted Alchemist

      Wrong! Wrong! Wrong! Drake- much like Eminem and Kanye are pop rap. What they do is NOT real hip hop. When they can make music that’s truly represents the culture, then I will co-sign your statement. Besides, the only people who really like Drake and Eminem are teenage girls- not exactly a fanbase that a rapper wants to have.

      I can name ten great hip hop albums to come out last year- and Drake is nowhere near the list:

      Phonte- Charity Starts At Home
      The Away Team- Scars & Stripes
      Saigon- The Greatest Story Never Told
      Actual Proof- The Talented Tenth
      Rapsody- Thank H.E.R. Now
      Median- The Sender
      9th Wonder- The Wonder Years
      Evidence- Cats & Dogs
      Common- The Dreamer/The Believer
      The Roots- Undun

      • Todd

        Even though I’d rather listen to the albums you listed instead of Drake’s junk (and I still want my money back for the last album of his that I bootlegged), I’m going to have to disagree. I’m sorry, but teenaged girls like music too. If anything, the mindset you have is of the dudes who got rejected by the teenage girls who “just don’t understand real music”. Chicks like dudes who express emotions, and Drake is the closest stuff out there that appeals to them. Let them live.

        Otherwise, let’s let women start choosing the women in the adult entertainment motion picture industry. You know that the brothers watching that while listening to the latest Saigon album would be HEATED!

        • http://pervertedalchemist.blogspot.com/ Perverted Alchemist

          “If anything, the mindset you have is of the dudes who got rejected by the teenage girls who “just don’t understand real music”. Chicks like dudes who express emotions, and Drake is the closest stuff out there that appeals to them. Let them live.”

          Here’s the thing though- I’m 37 years old and I came up in a time where cats like Drake didn’t exist- making songs about being emotional…I don’t get it. His whole aura and style is unfamiliar to me as a hip hop head. Nothing against him personally, but I just can’t rock with it as a man nearing 40 years old. If that’s what the teenage girls like…fine, that’s their life. It’s just not my cup of tea.

      • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

        you’ve got a pretty severe J.U.S.T.U.S. League bias going there. And I’d say that most of those albums weren’t great. Great moments? Sure. Great bodies of work? No. And I love Phonte but that album I couldn’t rock with the whole way.

        The Roots on the ohter hand, Undun, is a masterpiece.

        • http://pervertedalchemist.blogspot.com/ Perverted Alchemist

          I wasn’t trying to list the Justus League on the list, but most of the albums I liked last year just happened to come from that camp. You ain’t like that Phonte, man? That joint is bananas!

          I loved that new one from The Roots. The only thing I hated about it was Def Jam not putting “Undun” out on vinyl.

          • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

            The beats on Phonte’s album didn’t move me. The dope joints like “the good fight” are dope beyond measure. but most of it is just blah to me.

      • Cheech

        Eminem is pop rap? i I’m a young adult and I have been listening to Eminem since 98. He is definitely not a pop artist by any stretch but his music connects with multiple people who are going through problems or needs a laugh. His disses have been vicious and targeted to what was mainstream, such as boy bands, teen idols and the other things that made up the music of our time. He talked about substance abuse, losing friends, and losing his mind. Where in the pop curriculum does that show up?

        • http://pervertedalchemist.blogspot.com/ Perverted Alchemist

          Eminem has always been a pop artist. Where do you think most of his success and airplay comes from? I don’t ever remember a hip hop station playing his music at all.

          Secondly, you’re giving Eminem way too much credit, fam. He doesn’t rap about all of what you claim. Rape, drug abuse and silly stuff absolutely, but not real life situations.

      • That Ugly Kid

        Sorry to burst your bubble. But there’s no such thing as “real” hip hop. Ever. And there never will be. It’s all just hip hop. Hip hop is about self-expression. Having a voice. Talking about whatever you want to talk about. This is why Drake’s “Take Care” and Childish Gambino’s “Camp” were THE two best albums of 2011. They kept it real with themselves and the listeners despite being called “soft” and “lame” respectively.

        Real hip hop is a false term create by Elitists who think their choice of music is superior to everyone else’s. Trying to make it so that hip hop must follow a certain criteria to be labeled “real”. When that defeats the entire purpose of hip hop. Which is simply to express yourself. To have a voice and to be heard. To let others know how you feel through music. This is what artists like Drake, Eminem, Kanye, Jay-Z, and others do.

        • http://pervertedalchemist.blogspot.com/ Perverted Alchemist

          It’s funny that KRS-One originated the term real hip hop around 1993, so take it up with him and not the elitists.

          Also, Drake and Childish Gambino don’t have the two best albums of last year. The two most talked about? I’ll give you that…

    • http://fourpageletter.wordpress.com keisha brown

      LOLLL.
      as i commented on SBM the other day – the drake slander to me is funny because well..in the land of from whence he came, sure we’re proud of wheelchair jimmy, but we dont have the population to make him as big as he is. you know who does? the americans who sling all kinds of slander at him.

      i find the whole thing ironic. did i buy thank me later (the actual cd) so that i can boost his canadian sales? yep. do i faithfully defend the interesting clothing choices, poses and/or lyrics? nopes. but let’s not pretend that what he’s doing is not THAT different than Ye with 808. he’s coming at it differently because well.. his upbringing was in one of toronto’s richest neighbourhoods. what else is he gonna say?

      *wraps myself in canadian flag and walks out. ;)

      • JessicaL

        Lol I forget sometimes he was on that show. Whenever I saw him I always said to myself. Damn he sure is a funny looking kid. That episode when he got shot had me in tears though.

      • Todd

        You know, you could have pushed more artists to sound like Kardinal Offishial. He’s talented AND not a crybaby!

        • http://pervertedalchemist.blogspot.com/ Perverted Alchemist

          But he is a sellout
          *points to “Not 4 Sale” album*

        • http://fourpageletter.wordpress.com keisha brown

          *bakardi slang!!!! LOL.

      • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

        making a Drake comparison to Ye on 808s is about appropos since folks were claiming that Ye needed to get out of his feelings and hike up his skinny jeans then too. there’s a reason why its his least popular album.

      • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M5FR1LGsT7E TheAnti-Cool

        Wheelchair Jimmy ftw! I loved Degrassi. Maybe that’s why I like Drake. Or maybe I feel sorry for him. Huh.

      • YeahSo

        Girl Americans are so flaky… they will talk about how much they hate an artist while listening to their album (which they downloaded btw)… psssh.

        Oh and I’m American, soddatay!

    • http://www.styleillusions.com WIP

      “like him squatting in GQ magazine”

      JC, why did you have to say this? Why? I have to fix my eyeliner from crying laughing.

    • http://pinchmycheekie.wordpress.com Cheekie

      “And why is being emo considered a bad thing? Last time I checked, music was supposed to be emotional. ”

      Didn’t you read the bulletin? Emotion is only good for ninjas when it is expressed as anger.

      -_-

      • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

        EXACTLY! why folks keep not getting the memo is beyond me.

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

      sorry…but I ain’t buying it nor do i feel like its wrong to throw shots at Drake. here’s the thing. i like Drake. but i recognize that he sets himself up constantly.

      and real talk, i put Drake there b/c i found that picture and laughed and immediately thought of Drake.

      you can feel some kind of way about folks not liking Drake. and that’s fine broham, but if folks want to throw shots i’ll let them. if you identify, that’s also cool. but if you come to my BBQ with a white wine spritzer..i’m clowning.

    • MJoy

      Cosignage!

      Love Drake’s music.

      And any joke referencing homosexuality ususally isn’t all that funny to me.

      • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

        where did a joke referencing homosexuality happen?

    • http://asiyah3.wordpress.com Asiyah

      “Last time I checked, music was supposed to be emotional.”

      That’s what I say. I don’t hate Drake because he’s emo. I hate him because he sucks.

      • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

        LOL.

  • naturalista88

    The scene you described in 3 is why I HATE going to the movies. The worst experience I’ve had by far is when “Stomp the Yard” came out & I was working @ an AMC; me & my friends were walking into the theater when this guy walked up to the door & proclaimed very loudly to his friend “And that’s why I had to suck his d*ck that night.” That right there set the mood for random outbursts, cuss outs and other kinds of f*ckery only experienced when in a theater damn near full of flamboyant gays. Pretty much stopped going to movies after that sh*t happened.

    • JessicaL

      I normally go to this movie theater in Pinellas Park, Fl. I’ve never had a problem. If anyone knows the area it can be a pretty racist place but again I had never had a problem. Last month I took my little sister there to the movies for her 14th birthday. As we’re sitting down I felt something hit me on the head. I touched my hair to see what it was. I didn’t feel anything so.i assumed it was popcorn. I cussed the kids out that were sitting above me. No one said anything so I turned around and finished the movie. When the movie was over my sister said.she had to go to the restroom. I went with her and waited. Then I looked in the mirror to fix my make up. That’s when I saw it. When I touch

      • JessicaL

        When I touched my hair in the movie I guess I felt the wrong spot. But looking in my hair there was this lump of spit. I was so disgusted and will never go back. I just wanted to take her to a nice place instead of the theater in St. Pete.

        • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

          that…is that bullsh*t.

        • A Woman’s Eyes

          Reading this pisses me off because I can’t swing and hit the people responsible. omg.

      • Rattlerpride

        ROFL. My hubby’s from St. Pete. I now can add one more thing to my list of ratchetness when I clown him about his city. Thanks!

      • Cheech

        Wow…..I’m impressed you didn’t go buckwild on them

    • Keisha

      Oh wow!!!

    • That Ugly Kid

      Stomp The Yard though? That’s nothing. Should’ve seen the movie theatre back when Babyboy came out. My dad and I were going to the movie theatre to see something else, but because of the massive crowd of ignant ninjas, he changed his mind. Good thing too. Three people got shot that night. No joke.

      • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

        hell, i remember when Boyz N Tha Hood came out. I was like….11 or 12 and I vividly remember the f*ckery going on in that theater…and how many gangs were spawned that day.

  • CurlyTop

    I wish homes came with women/men bathrooms or at least a urinal in one of them. Seperate but equal bathrooms in homes would decrease husband/boyfriend death by 86.4%

    • http://www.iamyourpeople.com I Am Your People

      This should be in government building code

    • A Woman’s Eyes

      They do exist. I know plenty of couples who don’t use the same bathroom in their house.

      • Chanelle

        Me too. If I’m married it will be a requirement for me to have my own bathroom…..it will be written in paper form and signed by all parties involved.

  • http://afrikanmami.blogspot.com African Mami

    What I don’t think should be separated is bathrooms. I always peek into the men’s bathroom. ALWAYS!

    • CurlyTop

      Lol, not only do I peek I use them in some cases. If there are 5 chicks waiting in line and no men waiting I call that an opportunity ;)

      • http://afrikanmami.blogspot.com African Mami

        @ CurlyTop

        I’ve ALWAYS wanted to “oopsie my” on dem….like just walk in and act like I didn’t know I was in the wrong place.

        • Justmetheguy

          @ African Mami- That sounds like the beginning of a dream I had a long time ago… U should do it. Men tend to be very helpful and rarely do we get offended in situations like that…I mean, you just got lost ;)

          • http://afrikanmami.blogspot.com African Mami

            @ Jmtg,
            I just might do it TOMORROW, oh I mean today!!!! Hmmmmm….shit! Can’t! There’s a lotta white dudes and not enough Mandigo’s—–errrrm, I meant,…….so yeah…….?nothing to peek at!

            • Justmetheguy

              lmao! womp

          • http://wildcougarconfessions.com Wild Cougar

            OOH! I’m SO gonna do that. *adds to bucket list*

      • Sigma_Since 93

        @ Curly Top

        You are the woman I despise looking at me side eye for coming out of my bathroom at the retail store.

        • CurlyTop

          But it was empty :( Despie me not I’ll smile at you on the way out.

          • CurlyTop

            *despise

            • Sigma_Since 93

              I know, I know I botched that word. Nothing makes me madder than waiting to use the bathroom and a woman comes out without a child in tow and then has the GALL to look at me like I’m wrong for looking at her. I mean I may give you a pass if you’re transgendered but come on! If some of the members of your female tribe would keep the woman’s room clean, some you y’all wouldn’t need to use the john.

              • http://afrikanmami.blogspot.com African Mami

                @ Sigma_Since 93,

                Women’s bathrooms are the most unhygienic! More reason for me to take my peeking to the next level!!! Use the men’s bathrooms!

                • Sigma_Since 93

                  @ African Mami

                  I know! When I worked retail, folks used to fight over who had to clean the women’s room.

                • A Woman’s Eyes

                  The secret is out. Women have worse aim than men in public restrooms. Ugh.

                  I go in with women’s restrooms with a quick prayer and a bottle of hand sanitizer…and that’s just to open the door.

                  • Sigma_Since 93

                    That’s because some of y’all hover over the seat or put your feet on the seat and squat. I often wondered what happened to all that kegel stregnth us men hear about or the woman that say they can pee standing up.

                    • SheWhoMustBeObeyed

                      “or put your feet on the seat and squat.”

                      iRebukeThis!!!

                      Why in the hell would anyone do that?? *Weeping*

                    • A Woman’s Eyes

                      feet on the seat?!? WTH?!?

                      The visual alone has me shaking my head and ROTFLMAO

                    • http://afrikanmami.blogpsot.com African Mami

                      @ Sigma_Since 93

                      We do that in the motherland…..We keegalize that ish! It is borne out of necessity

                    • JessicaL

                      Lmao, I’ve never heard of feet on the seat. You sir, just killed me.

    • That Ugly Kid

      I agree with this. I mean, the bathrooms of children should be segregated. But once they’ve had “The Talk” and they reach the age of consent, they shall be allowed into the adult unisex bathrooms. That way I can do a “reverse-oopsie”. Where you’re using a urinal and “accidently” show a chick your peen.

      Me: Oh dear, would ya look at that? My wee wee’s out. Pretty big huh?

      Random Chick: Not really. Actually it’s a bit tiny. Like carpet fiber.

      Me: Well…uh….how about you go ingest more alcohol? And then we can re-enact this encounter.

      • That Ugly Kid

        Free meh!

      • http://afrikanmami.blogspot.com African Mami

        @ TUK

        Your reverse oopsie my——–>has been APPROVED!! LOVE IT!

      • YeahSo

        :-( carpet fiber.

    • http://pervertedalchemist.blogspot.com/ Perverted Alchemist

      I want to say something really sleazy right now, but out of respect for African Mami, I won’t do it because I like her.

      • http://afrikanmami.blogspot.com African Mami

        @ PA

        awwwwwww!!! You da bestest!

    • http://pinchmycheekie.wordpress.com Cheekie

      I’m especially enthralled by the men’s bathroom at my job. Like, WHY do they have an extra door that leads to the urinals/stalls? If you open the door, there’s the sink, but then there’s another door that leads to… who knows what. In fact, I don’t even think it leads to the urinals and stalls. I think there’s a secret strip club in there or something.

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

      why do you peek?

      • http://wildcougarconfessions.com Wild Cougar

        The possibility of catching a peek of naked wang. Why else?

        • A Woman’s Eyes

          A wang that is all flaccid and peeing is not the same as all the other times to see wang. I’m just saying. Nobody wants to see that unless that’s their fetish.

        • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

          i think y’all would be disappointed. not by size or anything, butby the antics. i personally pee my name on urinals. in cursive.

          • http://pinchmycheekie.wordpress.com Cheekie

            #youtubesoiknowitsreal

          • A Woman’s Eyes

            I just hollered

          • http://afrikanmami.blogspot.com African Mami

            @ Panama

            You a damn mess!!! But that’s segzy peeing in cursive….

      • http://afrikanmami.blogspot.com African Mami

        @ Panama,

        1.) it’s a hobby!
        2.) I like seeing flaccid woola woolas
        3.) looking for a Mandigo warrior

        I mean, c’mon!

        • http://wildcougarconfessions.com Wild Cougar

          Yeah! I didn’t have a brother. I am fascinated by wangs. Don’t judge me.

          • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

            if you did have a brother, and thereby had all of your wang curiosity’s satisfied by said fact…i’d be slightly disturbed.

            • Justmetheguy

              +1 Panama, I was just about to ask her if she knew anyone who made a habit of regularly inspecting their brother’s wang lol

              • http://wildcougarconfessions.com Wild Cougar

                No, silly! Lmao. Wangs are fascinating cause men are fascinating cause I didn’t have brother. I’m assuming living with a male would make them boring and gross to me. Or so I’ve heard.

        • A Woman’s Eyes

          I thought all you had to do was get on the internet and ask for wang pictures that show the whole person instead of just the wang. Or from the neck down to the knees. LMAO

          • http://wildcougarconfessions.com Wild Cougar

            Live wangs only, please. Thank you.

      • YeahSo

        @PJ… seriously? Why not!??!

  • http://www.iamyourpeople.com I Am Your People
    • CurlyTop

      That link and Cheekie ain’t shiz. She tried teaching ya’ll real hip hop but ya’ll ain’t bout that life.

      Reason #7a why I can’t quit the VSB Fam

    • https://twitter.com/#!/mackaroto Jay
    • eye(c)ande

      Why come for Deena/Dina is hip hop?! This brought me to tears and then I DIED a thousand times. From the bottom of my tickled heart, thank you IAYP.

    • Breezy

      Thanks IAYP for posting this cause I was just about to. This right here nearly put me in the hospital for splitting my side laughing. Not the Walgreens jacket tho….lol

      Cheeks you are a clown!

    • http://www.styleillusions.com WIP

      First of all “everythingisterrible.com” may be one of the best URLs ever.

      This was great. Am I wrong for thinking she danced pretty well? That white boy rolling his back was IT. Thank you for sharing this, LOL

      • JessicaL

        Lmao where was she when save the last dance came out. Maybe she could have taught Sarah real hip hop so she wouldn’t have to go through all of her struggles.

    • Deeds

      That video was too funny. Like the chick was too serious though and just knew what she spoke.

      • A Woman’s Eyes

        And she moved like she just got there from a ballet class and Bob Fosse class. Hilarity! The boy doing the body rolls? Hilarity And what was the girl doing? I thought the girl was going to break out in mime.

    • LSQ

      so that’s what “makes it hip-hop!!!!!”

    • telekendall

      still. . . the fact that my father sent me that link is just. . . i hate/love my daddy so much. . .

      and then the cheekie spin on it.

      #love

      • http://pinchmycheekie.wordpress.com Cheekie

        Yeah!!! #teampapatelekendall

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

      lol. yeah i remember seeing that a ways back. i actually sent that to all of my coworkers b/c we’d JUST had a convo about *drumroll please* hip-hop dance class which spawned this post.

      Cheekie sent me that link to the video and the angels sanged to me.

      • http://pinchmycheekie.wordpress.com Cheekie

        #vsbbehindthescenes

    • Chanelle

      lmao…i knew it was gon be this lady! why lord why!