Pink Kisses, Bad Ideas, and The Woman Shortage In China

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I’ve come across some bad ideas in my day. Hell, I’ve probably been the mastermind behind half of them. You’ve heard of the Pet Rock? Of course you have.

Me? I came up with the Pet Rock leash. If you’re like me, you hate it when your rock gets away. It only took off in the crackhead community and as you can imagine, that led to nowhere.

Stop Snitchin’ t-shirts? Yeah, I tried to promote the Start Snitchin’ campaign but that one went awry after I refused to give my name to reporters out of fear of snitching on myself. Needless to say, that business tanked too.

The point is, I know a bad idea when I see one.

Pink Kisses? Come on down!

*Price Is Right music*

What is Pink Kisses? Glad you asked. It’s a site intended to help women through breakups. I won’t do it proper justice so I’ll let them tell you. Here’s there mission statement:

To help women through heartbreak with all sorts of fabulous pick-me-ups. We’ll surprise you with chocolates, flowers, texts, emails, and our exclusive virtual gifts; we even have our own PK Life Coach to help you set new goals and a “Diva for a Day” experience where we spoil you with a fabulous, personalized photo shoot, to help mark a new chapter in your life.

At Pink Kisses, we want to change women’s lives by inspiring them to take control of their own fate and reminding them they are fabulous creatures that deserve to be spoiled… time and again.

Hey Panama, what gives? That sounds like a great idea.

*scratches beard*

By jove, you’re right, it does. Why however could I think this was a bad idea?!

Oh, right. Women, you have PAY for these services to make yourself better. You need an example don’t you? Of course you do. Basically, say Shakashawn breaks your heart. Boo hoo you. You are heartbroken. Yes, you have a broken heart, hence your heartbrokenness which is how you get a broken heart. Where do broken hearts go?

Hello, Brooklyn.

Well ladies, for $272 you can send YOURSELF some flowers, text messages, some chocolates, and a few other things to make you feel like a lady again. Oh yeah, some life coaching lessons and some posters.

Hmm…

So let me get this right. You got your heart broken so what you should then do is pay some chicks who probably have men to send you pick me up text messages and flowers and chocolates which are the very things that will remind you that you don’t have a man to do those things for you…from women. Look, I suppose in spirit this is a good idea but why would any woman spend money on things that a man who likes you would do in order to remind herself that she’s going to be okay? It’s like a vibrator without batteries. No return on investment. Forgive my ignorance but I can’t see how sending yourself flowers helps you get over a breakup. Flowers aren’t cheap. So you lighten your bank account to look at something in your home that your ex would have sent, but didn’t. But yes, you are liberated!

Viva l’azaleas.

S

W

I

T

C

H

But ladies there’s hope. Apparently there’s a woman shortage in China - to the tune of about 32 million. You see, China has a one child-rule for certain peoples. And since female infanticide is an accepted part of culture due to the preference for male children, the Chinese done f*cked themselves (is this a pun?) out of the poonany. So ladies if you don’t feel like spending the money on a breakup kit from Pink Kisses you can go to China and find you a Chinaman. I’m sure they’ll be fighting over you hand and fist. That’s not a pun as I’m not saying all Chinamen are kungfu warriors, because they’re totally not. But I do know one thing, with that kind of shortage, there will be more wangs fighting of your sisters than you could shake a cat at.

What say you people, is the Pink Kisses thing a good or bad idea? OR is it a much needed tool to help women overcome a breakup? Guys, if there was a man version of this, perhaps with manly things in it, would you ever consider something like that to help boost your esteem…if nobody would ever find out about it?

And most importantly, ladies, would YOU date a Chinaman?

-VSB P aka THE ARSONIST aka TANGLE JIG P aka 40 P aka VITAMIN P aka GO KING BEEF aka GIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIRL HE A 3

320 thoughts on “Pink Kisses, Bad Ideas, and The Woman Shortage In China”

  1. The Chinese are merely taking (in some cases literally) women from other countries to help with the shortage. The only downside is that the Chinese seem to look down people of darker hues. My time in Beijing and Shanghai was not pleasant.

    There’s a business in there somewhere, such as a matchmaker. You instantly have a max of 32 million potential customers.

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  2. Pink Kisses is a weird idea….
    Mostly friends tend to help out in your moment of need. I can’t think of a male version for this other than random dudes taking you to a club or watching a football game.

    By OKcupid standards: Trey Songz Concert

    As for the sistas heading to China……Good luck. China has a lil negative view about people with dark skin, but don’ let that stop ya.

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    • “China has a lil negative view about people with dark skin, but don’ let that stop ya”

      Go to Macau! I lived in China for 6 months and Macau felt the most home with the Portuguese and black population….But seriously, what is up Pink Kisses? How is paying someone to send you flowers, texts, and what not gonna make me feel better? It would make me feel worse. Hell I’d rather just get no flowers than have to pay for it.

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      • Thats good to know.

        After I read about a young women who was singing on their version of America Idol and the offensive emails they made about her (I think she was half black but, her skin tone was a solid caramel).
        Had to add that to the “If your not America, then your black a** is not welcome”

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    • @Mr. Gundam

      Yes, Pink Kisses is a very weird idea. I think that defeats the purpose of attempting to pick yourself up.

      Now, the spoil day/photoshoot is a great idea with a side bar!

      …..but then you wouldn’t need Pink Kisses

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    • I tell you what… if they are that hi-strung on complexion/race when the pickins are that slim… they must be really close minded.

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  3. There is a male version of this.

    Strip clubs.

    In all seriousness though, I’ve heard of male lounges over in the East where women go to get their egos stroked. Kind of like that anime Ouran High School Host Club *cough*.

    No sexy time, just a nice looking dude who says nice things about you.

    I don’t think something like that would work over here though. We’re too sexual.

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  4. Women do not need to spend money on flowers and chocolate after a break up. They need to spend money on a gym membership and a shrink (and maybe a pair of killer Loubitans sp?).

    Chinese men are not appealing to me, I’ll pass.

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    • “They need to spend money on a gym membership and a shrink (and maybe a pair of killer Loubitans sp?)”

      Co-sign on the gym and shoes! That makes me feel better than a guy sending me flowers. Working out and shopping for shoes are 2 of my favorite things. Throw in traveling and I’m in bliss.

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      • I agree with you Leila…. if you MUST invest, a great pair of Louboutins is guaranteed to make any girl happy…. While Pink Kisses is a (sorta but not really) good idea it’s a lie and it’s embarrassing. Buy flowers to brighten up your space, but don’t send yourself lovenotes that you wish were coming from your man. That’s just gross… There’s nothing wrong with pumping yourself up and tooting your own horn… doing so through Pink ladies or whateva they’re called is weird. lol :-)

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    • “They need to spend money on a gym membership and a shrink (and maybe a pair of killer Loubitans sp?).”

      Right?! Flowers — much like said relationship — die. Quickly if you ain’t got no green thumb and whatnot…and depending on what the flowers are. But, if you keep it up…the results from the gym membership can last. And what better way to show off your newly toned-legs and overall Beyonce single lady-aura than a pair of Louboutins…with the money you were gonna use on his Christmas present (a new golf set or some other man-ish) because he broke up with you before the holidays? Ka-ching!

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  5. this is some 2520 shyt at it’s best.

    vss’s usually call their girls put on her best f*ckem dress and hit the club scene for about a month or two and BAM over him. NEXT!

    chinamen are too short.

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    • Agreed on all fronts.

      I live in Cali and a lot of Chinese men top out at around 5’5” or 5’6”. I’m 5’7” and I stay in heels, so that’s a no bueno for me.

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        • Hey I’m 5’4 3/4 (important!) so yup, it’s not a problem…

          I do dig Asian boys though … but that’s probably because as my friends put it I was probably from the Szechuan province or a good Punjabi girl in my most recent past life. :)

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          • Here in New Orleans we have a pretty large Vietmaneese culture ( i think i misspelled that ) and I got to give it to them.. some of the men are really REALLY hot… I mean, granted.. a lot of the Asian men I see are borderline thugg biker boys. But vietmaneese are on the darker side of Asian.. so that may be where the attraction is for me.

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            • @lanieanna
              Ya know I didn’t realize there was a lot of Viet in NOLA until I saw this documentary a few weeks back about their neighborhood and how they built it back up after Katrina.
              I was suprised.

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            • I’m not surprised at the big Vietnamese population in New Orleans… My country is a former French colony like Louisiana is, and my neighbors growing up were the Nguyen. :) … A lot of Vietnamese (like the Lebanese) settled in old French colonies….

              The owners of my new favorite Vietnamese restaurant moved to Houston from New Orleans after Katrina… But that man speaks of New Orleans with such fondness and nostalgia.

              And I do like them thug biker boys with the Yakuza tatoos… (see what my friends mean?? :) )

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          • I have a tendency to fall all out behind middle eastern or indian men (i know, I know) but they are usually short too. Like if naveen andrews was 6 in taller I would seriously consider stalking him

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    • lol cosign @ vss’s usually call their girls put on her best f*ckem dress and hit the club scene for about a month or two and BAM over him. NEXT!

      some asian men are fooooooooooooooooooiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnneeeee tho. I’d be open to try if we mentally connect and he’s tall and handsome.

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      • some asian men are fooooooooooooooooooiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnneeeee tho

        Please say that again! I have a Vietnamese colleague (Houston being kinda like Little Saigon really)… That boy is fine as frog hair! and tall too!

        But like I said above, I’ve always had a soft spot for Asian dudes… :)

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        • I cosign the hell out of this statement. Its one of the many reasons I love Houston. Fine men of every shade. :) I’ve seen a few Vietnamese hotties that had me forget what I was supposed to be doing. Lol!

          As far as paying to have someone send you gifts, that’s delusional! Why not just pick them up yourself, or treat yourself to something? Hell, if a man is what you want, hire an escort and keep it moving. Why deceive yourself and those around you?

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          • Yes ma’am! Best kept secret in the US in my opinion… Houston is a really diverse city… There are all kinds of hot guys (and girls)…
            Funny enough, only people who live here know about this…

            Shoot, you can have Ukrainian food on Tuesday, Ethiopian on Wednesday, and Peruvian food on Thursday… There is everything for everybody.

            SFG, you know your e-boo lives here, so that’s double-incentive for you to come down. :)

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  6. Bump whatcha heard. If I had disposable income and a man who did me wrong, I’d be all over Pink Kisses. It’s like a Love Santa you pay for. PLUS you really do need something to take your mind off of things right after a bad breakup or some shady dude doing you wrong. It might even be a good gift for your girlfriends going through it with some shady dude.

    I’m mad I didn’t think of this idea first.

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    • PLUS you really do need something to take your mind off of things right after a bad breakup or some shady dude doing you wrong.

      um, aint that what friends are for? i guess if you don’t have any friends then you need SOMEBODY to make you feel better. even if it is some blonde white chick who will benefit from your heartbrak. white people stay winning.

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    • Liz I’m shocked (which is weird considering Ion’t know you lol)… I mean you do know YOU bought that sh!t that’s being sent right? So why not just save yourself shipping and handling and pick it up yourself.

      Now, if this service is for a friend buying the package for a friend then ok… Like I would use it for a homegirl going thru a break-up… maybe… naw I’d prolly just take her out and let her get drunk on my dime *shrug*

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      • You know you bought it but you don’t know exactly what it is. There’s an element of mystery to it. It’s not like I went to 1800flowers.com and ordered me a bouquet. It’s still a surprise and still a distraction. Even one of the free virtual gifts on the site was pretty funny, and I’m sure a lil pick me up when in times of misery.

        I dunno I get what you guys r saying, that’s what friends are for but sometimes when a guy situation is bothering you a lot, you DON’T want to have to keep whining to your friends about it, and harping on it with them. Sure, they probably do it to you too but nobody wants to be the wet blanket. You can take some solace from something else and this looks like it could do the trick.

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        • OK *confession*… so I went to the site, because initially I just read Panny’s post and assumed I knew it all, but after checking it out I will say that that sh!t right there is ridiculous… LIZ do not let me find out you went to pink kisses for (basically) attention, hell you can save ALL yo’ money and come on here and we’ll send you tweets (well they will, those that tweet) and say nice sh!t to make you feel better for EVER. :)

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  7. As for Chinese men. I can’t tell Asians apart no way, so it don’t even matter if they’re single in large quantities or not. Much like white people, I don’t have time to dissect them all into little subcultures.

    I could go for a Blasian though. Send them my way.

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  8. I could think of a much better way to spend almost 3 bills…lol Pink Kisses wow, gotta hand it to you for coming up with a clever(and really pathetic) way to separate grieving ladies from their money. Kinda reminds me of ladies in my former office who would send themselves flowers on Valentine’s Day. #soobvious. As far as Asian kats,I would entertain the thought if I met one who looked like Ian Anthony Dale. Yummy. I saw him on Cold Case (Japanese Interment Camp epi…lol) and was instantly in lust. :-D Or if I find one who looked like a former (married!) co-worker who was from Malaysia. He was 6’4, with an English accent and fine as all outdoors. Until then, I’ll stick with Black and Brown men.

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  9. Who says a sistah gotta go to China? Asian men and black women are dating, loving, living, and raising families (and Yay them!). A Youtube search will show you photo montages and videos of some beautiful couples and their equally beautiful children. The China shortage had nuthin’ to do with anything! LOL!

    Yes, I have been attracted to Asian Men and folks don’t have to limit themselves to China. Although it isn’t highly publicized, EVERYONE (all genders, races, and ethnicities) has more options than popular opinion is giving credence to. Everyone.

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    • I’ve been attracted to Asian men too!and I get it alot too. Ive got chinese style eyes (not sure how) so that may be what it is at first glance. Ive got a casual date with a chinese friend(hes my cousins best friend) tomorrow and i know hes into me. Honestly hes very attractive funny and smart, all round very cool dude. Conversation is great. But I have to be honest I know we’d start getting looks and comments if we dated and ish and not sure I can handle that. I live in London and a few of my friends who’ve had interacial relationships with white guys have had to deal with people in the street making comments, esp black dudes, like ‘what a waste’ etc. His parents would prob have a fit anyway, they are very traditional..Just being real… Is there really a point if its not going to go anywhere. Technically I could date them, but hardly a chance of me marrying one. Countries who I hear have a history of looking down on black people scare the sh*t out of me. Some Eastern European countries, Asian, even South African men sometimes cos in my subconscious Im like, youre what, 30, so you grew up during apartheid (or you think black is less than..)…err….no thanks…
      Still…been thinking about cancelling this date all week…

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      • I love in London too. Usually its only the older generation that ever really make comments. I have dated a Filipino guy, Chinese, Vietnamese, and a Thai guy an I don’t really think about what people say…other than the older generation of Asians. Our generation is pretty lax, I think London is one of the easiest places to have an interracial relationship, people aren’t as hung up on colour as they are in America, or South Pacific, so If you like him and he’s nice, attractive, funny, then you should go for it. Good men are NOT easy to come by.

        If not send him my way!

        hahahaha

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        • Hahaha…
          You know youre probably right about London being relatively easy compared to other places. It sucks that it even has to be an issue though. Thanks for your comment It actually helps put things into perspective! Im going to go, we’ll see what happens, either way Im pretty sure im guaranteed a fun night !

          Great blog by the way..

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        • I think London is one of the easiest places to have an interracial relationship

          I should have read your reply before posting a response. Lol!

          I have dated interracially as well… and the people who are going to talk, were going to talk regardless. So yeah, please do you!

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      • ” I think London is one of the easiest places to have an interracial relationship, people aren’t as hung up on colour”

        i will have have to agree.London is far from perfect, but i don’t find miscegenation to be that big of a deal here. Admittedly, though experiences vary.I agree with, adopefiend of just going for it. You never know until you try right?

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        • I had to look up miscegenation by the way hahaha.. u learn something new everyday.

          I’ve heard a few horror stories but to be honest its probably more in my head at this point. Maybe Im the one whos uncomfortable and no one will even notice lol lol . Im going to try it out anyway.

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      • London I think is a little more progressive than most other cities as far as interracial dating goes…

        And I seriously think you should follow your gut as in do you like him, like him, and forget about what other people may say or think… There is always going to be naysayers on everything anyways, so have fun and explore your horizons! ;)

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        • i agree on London, but i think Europe in general (depending on which city you live in ) seems to be more accepting of interracial dating than America is…or at least that’s what my friends tell me…or is it that they are less fixated on race? ioknow

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          • I think it’s a mix of both… and also the racial history is less heavy than it is here… Most European countries managed to do their dirt “away from home”… so the guilt/shame combo is less pervasive which in turn makes them feel more “liberal”…

            And a reality is that most non-whites in Europe still have some ties even if really thin to a “country of origin”… and they got there for the most part on their own volition…

            Long story short, it’s just a different socio-economic and historical context…

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            • Good explanation! I was trying to explain this to a friend and I couldn’t put my finger on it. In Europe, men love women…period. I think they are much more aggressive than americans are. There isn’t a huge racial history there either.

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    • Asian men and black women are dating, loving, living, and raising families (and Yay them!)

      Exactly!!!

      Shoot, if I was on the market, I would have probably ended up with an Asian dude… I’m surrounded by them. Lol.

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