Dating, Relationships, & Sex, Lists, Race & Politics, Theory & Essay

Part 2: Where The Hell Are All The Good Single Black Women (No, really. I’m serious about this too. Seriously.)

Please tell them if you've seen her

Ranging from humorless and predictable (“Good black men are right in front of your noses, but you all are too busy having babies by Gucci Mane to notice“) to excessively academic (“The neglect of incorporating a Venn variance to ascertain excess noise suggests a metacognitive dissonance rendering the study obsolete“), several themes were repeatedly brought up in the comments generated by yesterday’s look at the “Where Are All The Good Single Black Men” infographic.

The theme that stood out the most to me, though  — and also seemed to cause a couple minor skirmishes — was people’s (and by “people’s” I mean “men’s“) reaction to the infographic’s latent message that women are “eligible” and relationship-worthy by sheer virtue of them being women.

Now, this isn’t the first time I’ve seen this occur. Anytime there’s any type of study or special talking about the ratio of black women to eligible black men, there’s going to be pushback by those who think that if women we’re held to the same criteria, the numbers would be a bit more even — a theory that’s both wrong and right.

I mean, as much as I want to represent for the brothas, holding women to the exact same criteria usually used to discredit us — college degrees, felony records, income, etc — is like playing Kobe one-on-one and asking him to rock a onesie instead of shorts and a t-shirt to give you a better chance. Regardless of how you dress him up, he’s still going to kick your ass.

Depressingly contrived analogies aside, there are actually some valid criteria that can be used to discredit the “relationship eligibility” of women; things that matter to men very much, and would have Fisher-Price websites running graphics asking “Where the hell are all the goodsingleblackwomen?” if they were ever given the proper attention.

Here’s a few of them.

Number of black women who cry at the end of “The Color Purple” every. single. one. of the 527 times they’ve seen the movie (approximate number: 44 in 100)

How emotionally stable can you be if the waterworks start every gotdamn time the pattycakes scene comes on? Nevermind the fact that my, um, “seasonal allegories” also always seem to flare up whenever I watch it too, you all are supposed to be The Queens and sh*t. Woman the hell up, stop acting like you’re so damn shocked that Celie and Nettie are meeting again, and try to forget about the fact that the actress who played Nettie was never, ever, ever, ever seen again.

Number of black women who’ve “dated” a professional athlete, rapper, or Barksdale in their adult life (approximate number: 27 in 100)

It disqualifies for two reasons:

1. Despite the fact that you may very well have the Killer P*ssy, none of us actually want to die because we happen to be dating you. Sure, you’re not actually dating Weebay Brice anymore, and you think we’re safe because he’s doing a quintuple life bid  at West Penn, but the nephew of his who shanks you with a sharpened Vasoline jar at a Waffle House booth probably didn’t get that message.

2. If you “dated” one of these characters and don’t have anything other than an STD and some expired Dave and Buster’s tokens to show for it, there’s a 99% chance that you were actually an adult groupie.

Now, there’s nothing wrong with being an adult groupie. They provide a service — Who else is going to entertain the entertainers? — and they always seem to know the best cheap pizza spots. But, thinking you were a gf when you were a jumpoff means that your self-awareness game is in the toilet, and how are you supposed to be trusted to decide which laundry detergent is best for our baby’s delicate skin if you can’t even label yourself?

Number of black women who refuse to have sex the week after they’ve gotten their hair done (approximate number: 31 in 100)

Considering the fact that the average black woman gets her hair done once every two or three weeks, you’re talking about having to go through mini-sex droughts for 40% to 60% of every month. That’s roughly six months of dry wang a year. No motherf*ckin bueno.

Number of black women completely devoid of hobbies (approximate number: 17.5 in 100)

And no, it doesn’t count as a hobby if you don’t sweat and/or develop carpal tunnel while doing it. So Riesling tasting, Trey Songs’ tattoo counting, and “non motherf*cking factor” t-shirt buying don’t count.

By my estimation, these numbers irrevocably prove that there’s actually -19.5 eligible black women to every 100 black men. How do you like those apples? Not as sweet anymore, huh?

Anyway, people of VSB.com: We already discussed where the good single black men might be hiding, but where the hell can you find these non-existent negative number-ass sistas??? Also, are there any other disqualifers that I neglected to mention?

—The Champ

***It’s that time again. The third installment of REMINISCE is happening this Saturday, October 1, at Liv Nightclub in Washington, DC. It’s one hell of a time as we spin the best of 90s hiphop, r&b, and dancehall. It’s FREE before 11PM ($10 after), OPEN BAR FROM 10-11PM, and no dress code. Come party with Panama Jackson since Wu Tang is here forever, MOTHERF*****S. See you then!! Here’s the Facebook invite with all the details: http://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=172606672819705***

Filed Under:
Damon Young

Damon Young is the editor-in-chief of VSB. He is also a contributing editor for EBONY.com. He resides in Pittsburgh, and he really likes pancakes.

  • Girl Kanyeshrug

    I don’t believe you are really serious with this question.

    • http://www.testorshia.blogspot.com Tes

      I’m sayin doe…

    • xLadyTx

      Naw, he couldn’t be…

    • http://pinchmycheekie.wordpress.com Cheekie

      He’s probably gonna claim he’s serious about deez. lol

    • randomeffery

      I just don’t see why a whole gender has to be blamed just b/c you (the general “you”) are unsatisfied with your history of relationships.

    • Keisha

      Can’t be serious…this post was written during a toilet run mang….straighten up Champ

      • Keisha

        ok sigh, in all fairness, I’ll offer some help, cuz obvious both sides need assistance.

        You could find us at the:

        hair salon – but please wait “outside” of it…don’t nobody want you to be involved in the prep work, just the outcome…”like i wake up this way :”

        gym – any chick that actually cares about her appearance and health will be at the gym, the more ballsy ones will be by the weights moreso than the elliptical, and probably more open to convo since she’ll be one of the few ladies in that section

        wine bars and similar “chick”/alcohol places

        shooting range – 99% sure if she’s there, she got no man…*sniff* *sniff* *I got membership, don’t judge me lol*

        mall – those sexy outfits that get you to do a double take do not buy themselves

        everywhere – I’m sorry, I still think guys have it easier in finding single women!

        • http://twitter.com/itztrizz617 her better option

          well i think 4/10 black women are single/eligible for an upgrade so yea…everywhere sounds about right

          • LMNOP

            lol, eligible for an upgrade… i like that

        • http://www.greenafrodiva.com Green Afro Diva

          As far as the gym, I tend to brave the elements, so catch a good black woman running the hoods of the DMV/B-more area!

          • tea

            Concur. We are outside jogging in the DMV. lol.

            • Sweet Sass

              I’m briskly walking in the DMV.

        • http://twitter.com/kjnetic peter parker

          Ii don’t we have it easier, because (since we’re using stats) 23% of women would actually be receptive to a guys approach at a given time.
          And yes I get it 100% of black men verbally accost y’all..etc.

        • A Woman’s Eyes

          “gym – any chick that actually cares about her appearance and health will be at the gym, the more ballsy ones will be by the weights moreso than the elliptical, and probably more open to convo since she’ll be one of the few ladies in that section”

          Yes! The weight room is why the gym is a good place to meet men.

          • Keisha

            @Woman’s Eyes – But just watch out for the juiceheads, all veined-up and bulging without matching peni$ lol…STERIODS KILL ;)

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

      I’m late to the party…by why can’t he be serious?

      • Girl Kanyeshrug

        Cuz basically all you have to do is step outside your door and the good women are everywhere..you don’t even have to go looking.

        I don’t believe you are serious with your question either…

      • Keisha

        Cuz my dear champ, like I said in my previous post, in year 2011 the dick is mightier than the pu$$y. Eligible men can NOThave the same difficulty finding eligible women because they, the men, are the minority, the “needles” in the “haystack” of women, etc

        I’m talking “good” guys however, not the i’m-a-good-guy-but-whine-about-nice-guys-finish-last-when-really-its-your-whining-ass-thats-scaring-off-the-ladies-not-your-niceness dudes :)

        Tell me I’m wrong Champ. Tell me you can’t go out and gauge the interest of single/eligible woman….i dare ya!

  • Kidsister

    How emotionally stable can you be if the waterworks start every gotdamn time the pattycakes scene comes on?

    That. right. there. has a steady stream of tears rolling down my face. TOO FUNNY! LOL

    …much like eligible bachelors are in the barber shop, I’m more than positive that’s where the eligible women are. There have been times when I got there at 6, straight from work and left at 2am.

    Also, I think a disqualifer for a woman is her body count. It’s okay for a guys BC to look like the ending score of a basketball game but for a woman, if it gets past a certain number…she can go ahead and forget about it.

    • xLadyTx

      +1 on women’s BC. Many of my guy friends use that as a disqualifier.

      • tgtaggie

        I really think that the woman’s BC is a serious double standard, especially if the guy has a BC that rivals the likes of Barney Stintson, Wilt Chamberlain and El Woody (Tiger Woods).

        • Kidsister

          I totally agree that it’s a double standard. However, while it’s not something I condone, it’s one of those issues where I take my “I was given this world, I didn’t make it” stance.

          • Yoles

            am i the only woman that has never been asked her number by a real prospect?? yes random dudes have asked me but they never really mattered… by i have never been asked the how many partners have you had question by any man that i wanted to or ended up getting serious with…
            #FlyingSolomaybe

            • Kidsister

              Nope, you’re not alone. I’ve not been asked my MF’n factors. Only by the non mf’n factors. Once, fairly recently the topic came up and he said he didn’t need to know because it didn’t matter. Major cool points for him :-)

              • Kidsister

                My curiosity (read: nosey-ness) wouldn’t allow me to pass up the opportunity of finding out his number, and to my surprise it was considerably low.

              • RG

                It mattered, but he knew no answer you gave would be sufficient. This is the conclusion all MF’n factors come to. No answer your lady gives is gonna be acceptable….so don’t ask.

                *I will draw a caveat, I wont ask a number, but I do like to know the potential for running into former flings. Just a business philosophy.

            • Tichelle

              nah, you aren’t flying solo. i’ve been told by men that it doesn’t matter how many you’ve been with (as long as you are std free blah blah blah blah) but they are appreciative for the man before than TAUGHT me a few things…..#howtouseyourteeth LOL!

            • Nell

              I’ve never been asked, either.

            • randomeffery

              you are not alone…

              the only time ‘numbers’ came up was w/my 1st…b/c we both had performance anxiety.

              but in my adult life, i have never asked or been asked that question by anyone i was even remotely serious about.

            • Who Dat!

              EXACTLY! Dont ask. Who wants to know that crap anyways, it’s the past. Only nosey a** people that want to judge ask that. That’s like asking how many jobs you’ve had previously and then using that as a basis to not like someone.

            • Sula

              am i the only woman that has never been asked her number by a real prospect??

              Nope you’re not. And it’s an instant panty-drier. How is this info any of your business? As long as we can both provide a clean bill of health (the paper proof) then we should be adult enough to go about our business. *smh*

              • Humble_One

                @Sula

                “As long as we can both provide a clean bill of health (the paper proof) then we should be adult enough to go about our business. *smh*”

                I agree. That’s why I actively pursue prostitutes and strippers with clean bills of health.

                • http://twitter.com/bruiser_ham Larry

                  LOL!!

            • http://fourpageletter.wordpress.com keisha brown

              yolie…i jussst wrote about this yesterday!
              this question is real! (there is even a brotha among us that likes to ask/presume this question on various blogs)..
              alas…

              • Kema

                *snickers*

    • kaname

      I disagree on the body count issue due to all the double standards surrounding it. If folks are going to slut-shame they better dole out their side-eye regardless of a person’s plumbing.

      • Kidsister

        I agree. I was being sarcastic when i said it’s okay for a guy to have a high BC.

      • Artful Dodger

        Men have eminently practical reasons for judging women based on their sexual history. And women have eminently practical reasons for judging men based on a host of criteria. No moral equation required,

        • http://twitter.com/MOTRenaissance Adonis (@MOTRenaissance)

          @Artful Dodger

          Amen… Marriage is too risky to make mistakes with wh*res & sl*ts…

          Women (& Men) who usually like alot of s*xual attention with different people will have a hard time honoring a monogamous arrangement…

          And let us not forget that we live in a society where your wife can f*ck your best friend in front of you, have his baby, and you are on the financial hook for that child…

          Go for younger women, Go for chaste women…

          SSTTE

          • http://twitter.com/MOTRenaissance Adonis (@MOTRenaissance)

            And also, to quell to the double standard hysteria…

            Most men of any race, that more into the monogamous family life, usually have low body counts… So, most men aren’t hypocrites on this one…

            • http://fourpageletter.wordpress.com keisha brown

              or lie.

              • http://twitter.com/MOTRenaissance Adonis (@MOTRenaissance)

                @KB Morning sweetheart…

                I doubt men are lying to play down their body count… But based on women current s*xual decisions, there are alot of men, that are unable to build their body count involuntarily… That cannot cash in on that wondrous double stand women lament about… Just Saying

                Now, if he is man of the cloth, he’s suspect to me…

            • http://www.pinchmycheekie.wordpress.com Cheekie

              “Most men of any race, that more into the monogamous family life, usually have low body counts… So, most men aren’t hypocrites on this one…”

              Keep in mind that a low body count for a man is on a whole different scale than for a woman. For some strange reason… -_-

              • http://twitter.com/MOTRenaissance Adonis (@MOTRenaissance)

                I was thinking less than 5 partners for both genders @Cheekie…

                There is maybe a small middle class of men… But for the most part… Either he is approaching triple digits, or cannot break double digits

                • http://www.pinchmycheekie.wordpress.com Cheekie

                  Everyone might have a specific “number” that applies, but we’re not talking specifics here. I’m saying that in general, if a man has one number and the woman has the exact same number, hers may be considered “high” while the guy’s would be shrugged off as “it happens.”

          • FredYetAgain

            “Go for younger women, Go for chaste women…” For long-term relationships, absolutely. For booty calls, I allow much more leeway as to a woman’s past. Speaking of which, some of the women around here have a LOT of “number” anxiety. I wonder why ….

            • http://www.pinchmycheekie.wordpress.com Cheekie

              Don’t gotta worry about me, mine is a goose-egg. Still think the number dichotomy between men/women is horse manure. lol

              • Artful Dodger

                It doesn’t matter what you think. Men have a certain hard-wired reaction when it comes to this. Just like women have a certain hard-wired reaction when it comes to short men. Or to a guy they just witnessed getting shot down by another woman lol.

                • http://www.pinchmycheekie.wordpress.com Cheekie

                  Course it matters. I just typed it in a comment.

    • k-steez

      Speaking of tears…nobody’s gonna say anything about Champ’s seasonal “allegories”? oh.

      • sugahoneyicedtea

        Lol I caught that too

    • http://www.shay-d-lady.com shay-d-lady

      Also, I think a disqualifer for a woman is her body count. It’s okay for a guys BC to look like the ending score of a basketball game but for a woman, if it gets past a certain number…she can go ahead and forget about it.

      a man that asks is disqualified in my opinion.. especially one that thinks his count doesnt matter if mine does.
      thats adolescent and shows he is insecure and overall just ridiculous a.s.s. h-e-ll

      • southernsweetness

        AGREED.

    • http://www.ifiruled2011.wordpress.com Mahogany Princess

      “if it gets past a certain number…she can go ahead and forget about it.”
      Just curious….What’s the magic number? I can still count mine on my hands but for the women that can’t, is that a problem for guys these days? Fellas, what’s up with that? How many is too many?

      • Humble_One

        @Mahogany Princess

        There is a calculation lol. But seriously most grown men know most women have been been a fwb, jumpoff, in a LTR etc. so they expect you to have bodies. The issue most guys have is if you let any man hit without discretion. These dudes talking about 5 bodies or whatever are crazy. They must only date young girls. I’ve known women that were LOOSE and there is no way I’m coming after the loser bum @ss nasty dudes they let hit.

        • http://www.ifiruled2011.wordpress.com Mahogany Princess

          Now the discretion thing I get. Let’s keep it funky, a women doesn’t have to tell you her true number and probably won’t so that number thing gets me. Same for guys, although it’s a bit more socially acceptable for them to run naked in a field of women, an extremely high number would be a turn off for them as well.
          Discretion is key. Is she frequent to the one night stand? Does she keep letting the baby daddy hit in dry spells? Does she not require protection? I think those are more valid considerations. I’m just saying. lol

    • Come on People

      Hey, I am a movie, cute baby siting, wedding crier. I am not ashamed to admit it. That does not mean that you are emotionally unstable. And when I cry i don’t need anyone to console me, I know how to self sooth…lol. Everyone needs a good cry, it cleanses the soul (at least that is what i have convienced myself). Weird thing is, i love weight training. I refuse to take zumba because i think it is for panzies.

  • http://www.testorshia.blogspot.com Tes

    Where are the eligible sistas? Waitin on a good man or somewhere disillusioned, drinking, doing kareoke or over working herself while waitin on a good man

    • http://www.twitter.com/diva_magnifique ChaoticDiva

      Alot of us are learning the wonderment of strip clubs next to shoe stores. Ok, I’m just starting ish now…

      • http://www.testorshia.blogspot.com Tes

        O_O they have those!?! I mean…ahem…yeah, I see how that could be exciting… :)

      • http://www.ifiruled2011.wordpress.com Mahogany Princess

        Oooohhhh sounds like my kinda party!

    • tgtaggie

      I’m waiting for her to fall out of the sky while I’m on my way club. lol.

      • http://www.testorshia.blogspot.com Tes

        Wouldn’t that hurt you though? :P

        • http://twitter.com/tylerg_thomas tgtaggie

          As long as she isn’t Precious.

    • http://moacn.wordpress.com Sir Fariku

      An eligible sista is probably not disillusioned. She knows she is eligible and not waiting on a good man, she is working on herself and she meets the good man when the time is right.

      • Tichelle

        +1
        *snaps*

        you betta say so

      • SheWhoMustBeObeyed

        “An eligible sista is probably not disillusioned. She knows she is eligible and not waiting on a good man, she is working on herself and she meets the good man when the time is right.”

        That reeks of naivete and lack of empathy… kind of like that whole ‘keep on praying’ or ‘leave it to God’ thing people tell you when you’re going through a sh*tstorm in life.

        Fact is, an eligible woman/man can get disillusioned due to multiple failures in the love department; sometimes, you find the right person and sometimes you don’t. Sometimes, rather than hope for ‘the right time’, you have to do something to create a good opportunity to meet someone… which brings me right back to disillusionment, which can happen when someone gives all and still doesn’t succeed.

        Also, I don’t understand what ‘working on herself’ means… shouldn’t that be a lifetime activity for all sane people? That actually has nothing to do with meeting a good mate. Do you mean that all people that have found a good mate have finished ‘working on themselves’? Or are you suggesting that people who haven’t found mates are somehow lacking on a personal level? You can still be imperfect and meet someone; both of you can then ‘work on your selves’. Niiiice…

        I’m sorry if I sound a bit harsh in my response. I’m not attacking you, I’m just attacking the notion that being complacent and basking in the knowledge of one’s eligibility will somehow land you a mate – which is what I think you are suggesting.

        Just like praying and waiting on God ONLY will never produce results (yep, been there done that), working on yourself and resting on your eligibility laurels will leave you single… Action is what is needed.

        This is just my long winded way of saying Tes, I agree with you. Also, Karaoke is not a sport for only the disillusioned… I’m living proof :D

        • http://www.testorshia.blogspot.com Tes

          :D I love to karaoke too…but most of my friends do so while drunk and upset so it’s a lot of “I Will Survive” and “Shake it Off” anthems lol

          In reference to what you said, I do agree; working on oneself is a lifetime thing that has little to do with another person in your life as you were separate people before and should remain so after. So…can’t we be separate together? Be our own people and work on ourselves and our relationships separately but equally?

        • http://www.wildcougarconfessions.com Wild Cougar

          I was just having a discussion with my co-worker yesterday about the thousands of single Black women waiting on God for the perfect man. This man usually has some amazing qualities on every woman’s fantasy wish list. And because of the woman’s strong faith and fervent prayer, fasting and whatnot, she sincerely believes she has earned the prize specimen, she will settle for nothing less and her father will grant the man in a magical fashion.

          Not trying to ridicule faith, but it seems to be the thing a lot of over 40 never been married Black women have in common. Maybe they should consider the possibility that God doesn’t intend to give them the wish list man.

          • GypsyCurl

            Cue in a Tyler Perry movie…*Boondocks version*

            Please God, send me a light-skint Christian man who is not going to beat me.

        • randomeffery

          wow, it seems you read a lot more into that comment than was there…

          although it is kinda weird that a dude said it…

          but i basically agree that that is true for “good men” and “good women”…

          & of course we work on ourselves until we die, but in the context of this convo, & being a good partner…if you’ve suffered cupid’s slings & arrows, you do need some recuperative solo time…many people also believe that if you’re tryna do partnership for the long haul, you need to have decent credit and some assets, too, or at least be stable in your career field of choice.

        • http://fourpageletter.wordpress.com keisha brown

          +1

        • http://www.ifiruled2011.wordpress.com Mahogany Princess

          JMO but I don’t think that is how it was meant at all or at least that’s not the way I view it.
          I think when we stop looking and searching for mista right is when he appears. During that time if your focus is you then you are better prepared to recognize him as opposed for falling for the okey doke from any Tom, Dick and Harry because you are lonely.

          • Come on People

            I am going to have to disagree with this statement along with the same statement that people make to couples that have not children ‘if you stop trying it will happen’ SMH. How can you find someone without looking? I think when people try so hard to not look and not put any effort in it, that is when you attack those that want you not the ones that you want and need. For people that want to be in relationships they look for relationships, like if you want a job you actively look for a job. Your not going to get a job if you sit and wait on it while ‘working on yourself’. Marriage is a job, you need to take an active part in the selection process because it could mean the rest of your life.

      • http://www.testorshia.blogspot.com Tes

        As an eligible VSY let me retort with this; I haven’t been looking for as long as I haven’t been looking and in both situations I always end up hurt some way and that hurt has/does/can turn into disillusionment. I take a lot of time for myself, do a lot of self-reflection and don’t really know or care if I’m ready or not as I think life is all about the practice as no one gets it perfect.

        I know I’m eligible. I work for myself and my family and I meet good men all the time. But those men aren’t the good ones for me though. They’ll be good at one thing I want, but not at anything I need and therein lies the rub, as I refuse to kind of settle for someone who I know won’t satisfy me all the way.

        So as an eligible sista who hasn’t been completely on the market just yet, I do sometimes get disillusioned because I feel like the dudes I meet or are approached by and date aren’t willing to meet me half way with much of anything I need while I always try to give them at least a taste of what they need. So…yeah.

        I’m not saying I’m every woman, but I am saying that for women like me, it’s hard to not get disillusioned when you know you’re good and nobody seems to be stepping to you like you’re worth it.

        *steps off soapbox*

        • Sigma_Since 93

          “I know I’m eligible. I work for myself and my family and I meet good men all the time. But those men aren’t the good ones for me though. They’ll be good at one thing I want, but not at anything I need and therein lies the rub, as I refuse to kind of settle for someone who I know won’t satisfy me all the way.”

          I applaud you for taking the time to self reflect and come up with this conclusion. Is this conclusion why I often hear women say they need several men to create the perfect man or I need a starting five and some subs to have the perfect women from my single friends?

          Your statement will become the next “It’s not you it’s me” version 2.0 in our generation as we all (hopefully) get grown.

        • ThatOneAKA

          @Tes- I feel you and understand your viewpoint.

          However, I think it is incorrectly to expect someone else to satisfy you/make you happy. Are there compatibility issues that exists that disqualify people? Absolutely. But to expect another inherently flawed individual to completely satisfy another inherently flawed individual, it won’t happened.

        • http://moacn.wordpress.com Sir Fariku

          Hmmm, missed this whole discussion. You got a point there are times that an eligible sista is disillusioned but shouldnt this be the exception and not the norm? Just saying. I guess I also confused disillusioned with angry there is a wide gap between the two. I will rephrase my statement as an angry sista is probably not eligible to any very smart brotha.

      • GirlSixx

        Love It!!!!

        Oh. And Agreed.

      • http://www.ifiruled2011.wordpress.com Mahogany Princess

        Amen!

    • Sweet Sass

      I’d have to be at rock bottom to karaoke.

  • http://www.twitter.com/diva_magnifique ChaoticDiva

    Ok, so am I like non-existant because I don’t fall into one of those three above categories?

    …but then again, I can’t consider myself single when I’m (imaginationarily) married to Batman and Morris Chestnut in Saskatchewan.

    Yes, I picked them both up in a Blockbuster. Don’t judge me.

    • Kidsister

      Points for being married to Batman (Unless you mean Batman from Immature…lol)

      • http://www.twitter.com/diva_magnifique ChaoticDiva

        Ugh! Roger? Hell-to-the-no. I meant the Dark Knight. He can creep in my window and avenge all of this anytime.

        • xLadyTx

          Roger got cute tho! Like much later…much, much later lol

          • Kidsister

            LOL @ Roger…and girl, he never got cute. LOL…All he got much much later was that receding hairline.

            • xLadyTx

              LOL aight I’ll give u that. I’m thinkin in terms of him just being Marques Houston. He’s got too many alter egos/names lol.

              • Kidsister

                Indeed he does but then again who doesn’t (See: Diddy & Jay Z)

                • xLadyTx

                  #true :)

                • http://www.twitter.com/diva_magnifique ChaoticDiva

                  But what person with any intellectual capacity** would ever want to marry either of those people?

                  **Beyonce is excluded from this being that she was smart enough to capitalize on merging their parallel “brands” together to create a powerful couple monster and a soon to be baby hollywood zombie goatang creature.

        • CurlyTop

          You like the wackiest super hero. He has ZERO super powers. Even Aquaman was cooler.

          *ducks*

          • http://www.twitter.com/diva_magnifique ChaoticDiva

            Hmm, lets see:

            Superman is a hobo that changes in public restrooms and telephone booths.

            Spiderman is underage. No hero is sexy enough to do 15 to 20 for.

            Aquaman sleeps with the fishes. (bad joke alert)

            Captain America just comes off as a little questionable to me.

            Wolverine and Cyclops both keep fighting over Jean Gray, so I’m not involving myself in that mess.

            The Flash’s name makes me question his bedroom skills.

            Who’s left? Oh yeah, the rich guy who owns a business, is a super genius, and has quite a nice crib and car. Did I mention he’s sexy?

            Do the Diddy and take that!

            • http://panamaenrique.wordpress.com Malik

              Who’s left? Oh yeah, the rich guy who owns a business, is a super genius, and has quite a nice crib and car. Did I mention he’s sexy?

              Iron Man? I think it would be safer to deal with Tony Starks’ AA meetings than Bruce Wayne’s insanity.

              • CurlyTop

                SWAMP THING!

              • http://www.twitter.com/diva_magnifique ChaoticDiva

                Tony’s an egomaniac. And I’m an avid drinker. It would never work, as much as I’d wanted to. We dated briefly, which is how I know…lol.

              • http://uphereoncloud9.wordpress.com Wu Young, Agent of M.E.

                Tony is also a man whore. He’s essentially the dude from Nip Tuck with a higher I.Q. and super powered friends.

            • CurlyTop

              I knew this was coming as soon as I typed that. But I’m sayin tho, if money makes you a super hero than Kanye West can be one too. And I cry tears of blood thinking of Waka Flocka as a super hero. Hehe or Gucci (buurr).

              • http://www.twitter.com/diva_magnifique ChaoticDiva

                Notice the words “super genius”. Kanye might be close, but Waka? Do I even have to type the laughter on that thought?

                • Royale W. Cheese

                  Kanye will never be a crime fighter. Besides, Kanye’s angst is some teenage level ego ish, whereas Bruce is hurt deep by the death if hs parents. I see you dig those brooding moody super rich geniuses.

            • tgtaggie

              You forgot to add that Clark Kent was game challenged.

            • http://twitter.com/kjnetic peter parker

              “Who’s left? Oh yeah, the rich guy who owns a business, is a super genius, and has quite a nice crib and car. Did I mention he’s sexy? ”

              Black Panther?

              • http://www.twitter.com/diva_magnifique ChaoticDiva

                They don’t live in Indiana. Otherwise, I’d be in like Flint.

              • kaname

                @peter parker – isn’t he married to Storm and thus ineligible?

                • http://www.twitter.com/diva_magnifique ChaoticDiva

                  Oh, that Black Panther. Clearly, its now past my bedtime.

                • http://twitter.com/kjnetic peter parker

                  ah yeah, that’s true…

                  *scratches BP off the list*

            • http://twitter.com/wavecapwillis Wave Cap Willis

              Who’s left?

              Ahem! *cough* *cough*

              Don’t mind me…I’m just this site’s bulletproof guardian!

            • http://www.testorshia.blogspot.com Tes

              “Do the Diddy and take that!” <-cracked me up

              Also, what about Black Panther? Sure, he's married now, but before then, he was super smart, single, and the ruler of his own country. Why you gotta exclude the brotha?

              • http://uphereoncloud9.wordpress.com Wu Young, Agent of M.E.

                Not wise to creep with a guy who has a wife that can throw lighting. C’mon Tes you like the Black Keys. What’s the lines form “Ten Cent Pistol”?

                “There’s nothing worse in this world than payback from a jealous girl/the laws of man don’t apply when blood gets in a woman’s eye”

            • GypsyCurl

              I just watched Thor and I will take a god over all of them.

              Talkin’ bout sexy!

              “Do you think he needs CPR? Cuz I totally know CPR.”

            • http://uphereoncloud9.wordpress.com Wu Young, Agent of M.E.

              Wolverine went out and settle down with a Blaxican sister.

            • Eddie_Brock

              “Spiderman is underage. No hero is sexy enough to do 15 to 20 for.”
              WRONG on so many levels. Ultimate Spider-Man is still in HS, but the regular old Amazing Spidey finished graduate school and has been perma-aged at about mid-late 20s for decades.

          • http://www.twitter.com/diva_magnifique ChaoticDiva

            I should also point out, I’d rather have a non super powered guy that won’t accidentally kill me in his sleep with death ray eyes because of a nightmare. Or during sex. Hancock anyone?

            • kaname

              Ehh, any superhero with enhanced physical capabilities would be a liability in bed – one wrong move and it’s a trip to the hospital at best, death at worst >_>

            • Sigma_Since 93

              What about Blade??

              • http://www.twitter.com/diva_magnifique ChaoticDiva

                Would you date someone that looked like Sheryl Underwood? Just saying….

                • Sigma_Since 93

                  LOL!!!

                  Lay off my Sorror!

                • A Woman’s Eyes

                  Sheryl Underwood’s husband did. Repeat after me, it is about how a woman makes her man feel. Somebody wanted to date her and even married her.

    • tgtaggie

      There is actually a black batman see: http://comicbook.com/files/2011/06/black-batman.jpg

      • http://www.twitter.com/diva_magnifique ChaoticDiva

        Thumbs way up for that.

    • http://fourpageletter.wordpress.com keisha brown

      points for spelling Saskatchewan correctly (unless you live there). ;)

      • http://www.twitter.com/diva_magnifique ChaoticDiva

        Thankyouverymuch! And I’ve never lived in Canada/ been to Saskatchewan. I’m actually banned from crossing Canadian land borders. Long story…

        • http://fourpageletter.wordpress.com keisha brown

          WHAT?!?!?! Chaotic Diva…you need to find me and tell me this story. Cuz that’s hard to do!

  • http://iamyourpeople.com I Am Your People

    WAY too many are at home, wondering where the good Black men are instead of getting out to where the good Black men (or h3ll, just other people) are

    • WayUPThere

      That’s a pragmatic and useful suggestion. So pragmatic and useful that no one will use it. SMH..

    • Mo-VSS

      Agreed. Black women seem to do things counterproductive to finding a GBM or any man, for that matter.

      No you don’t have to hit a bar or club to find them. You know where you’ll find a lot of men? The gym. Try it. You might just get toned up while you do. (not implying anything, just saying…)

      • hehe

        So true! It’s so sad that more women aren’t going to gym, heck even at my local park where I run/bike ride have a tons of tone hot black men.

        • Mo-VSS

          Girl! Let it stay a secret. I’ll be more than happy to find my husband there :)

        • LadyC

          At my gym, lots of squirrely looking folks. Besides I wouldn’t wanna meet a man all sweaty and thangs with my weave perfectly coiffed into a ponytail so my tracks don’t show and my headband secured. Not ideal

          • hehe

            but if you’re sweaty and thangs wouldn’t they think it’s sexxi? You know it remind them of sex.

          • Sigma_Since 93

            @ Lady C

            That’s the problem. If I find you attractive when YOU think that you are at your worst, I will definitely be blown away when you get all fancy. I understand the desire to be 100% but the side effect is that we have trouble when we have to show true, non 100%, selves.

          • http://www.wildcougarconfessions.com Wild Cougar

            Guys get all big grins and discombobulated around a sweaty woman. All kinda thoughts running through their heads but they can’t say. It’s cute.

            • Sigma_Since 93

              It’s not just the gym. If beauty is in the eyes to the beholder, my eyes in this case, The outfit you pick, the par fum you chose to wear that day, etc. may not hit me the same way.

              I appreciate when my wife is dressed all fancy but I find her most attractive when she’s sitting indian style, no makeup, no fancy outfit, on the couch studying with her eyeglasses on.

            • TheRealestLeo

              Somehow, this applies everywhere EXCEPT the military. Just saying.

              lol

          • Sula

            Wouldn’t you prefer that he sees you at worst AND falls for you then? It would make sense that if he falls for you when you’re not glammed up, then he’ll do backward flips when you are.

            When I was dating, I would pick hiking/biking/volunteering as second or third dates. That way you get to see me in my sweaty glory and can decide if you want to proceed. :)

            • LadyC

              I’ve been approached in my “diamond in the rough” moment sans makeup and stuff. But when I’m working out, really- I’d rather not be approached bc I’m really working out. Not trying to ‘toot that thang up/arch my back while making eyes and all.

              Now meeting a guy while volunteering with a little lipgloss on, I could do that!

              • Sigma_Since 93

                I feel you on this somewhat. I don’t want you trying to engage me in a conversation when I’m trying to push up that last rep when I’m doing squats. I’ve always looked at it like this if I find you attractive at that rough moment and you feel the same way, it doesn’t matter / should not matter the garb you have on, lip gloss, etc.

      • http://www.6monthsto30.wordpress.com chunk

        meh, not my gym *shrugs* but I aint mad because it’d probably be distracting lol

  • eye(c)ande

    We are not on stage at King of Diamonds. Well at least not since 2006…

    We are right hereuh commenting and sht

    • http://fourpageletter.wordpress.com keisha brown

      *underrated comment of the morning.

      • eye(c)ande

        thank ya kindly

  • Royale W. Cheese

    Lol. Okay, another filter…she’s over 30 and has never had kids. It means no one wanted to reproduce with her, she pulled a Casey Anthony, or she’s lying and having her kids secretly raised by nuns. Add that number with the number of women who have kids already, who are also undateable, and you’ve got zero eligible black women over 30.

    • Bumilla

      Oh my fcuking gawd. You can not be serious with this comment.

      *takes off five inch heels*

      A black woman over 30 can’t be childless BY CHOICE? Maybe she’s waiting on the correct husband/father of her children to show up? Maybe she doesn’t want to be another single mom/divorce statistic? Maybe she’s still in school? Maybe she wants to travel? Maybe she uses birth control?

      Really, what in the hale are you talking about right now? Have you been to an accredited institution of higher learning? Can you wipe your arse without getting stuck in it? You need to take a seat because this is quite literally the most ignant comment I have seen in these here parts in a long time.

      SECURITY!!!!! #imdone

      • kaname

        maybe she doesn’t want children at all…ijs

        • tgtaggie

          Blasphemy! A 30 something BW that doesn’t want kids. I didn’t knew they exist (*sarcasm*)

          • kaname

            @tgtaggie – *nods* Indeed! let’s not even *talk* about the owning of cats issue.

      • Mo-VSS

        LOL, the hostility is hilarious…yet dead on. Just because some women have children before 30, not all of us want them. Or if we do, we want them with HUSBANDS…not baby daddies. And not all women over 30 w/out kids are walking around aborting them because she used the “oops” method of becoming a mother. This forum is called very SMART brothas (and extends to sistahs as well) and that comment is just…not.

        I’m sincerely hoping that her comment was sarcasm because if not, that type of faulty thinking is what is keeping black women from winning on a larger scale. (cuz this black woman STAYS winning).

        • Misty Knight

          Ummm..I kinda think Royale was being facetious..so… yeah. Feathers were ruffled.
          O_0

          • Bumilla

            If she was, then I apologize for coming out swinging. It’s hard to judge tone on le world wide webs.

            But if she wasn’t, then I amend my comment to say all good black women can be found fighting on the internets.

          • Mo-VSS

            I was hoping so, but you never know. In the case that she wasn’t, I just wanted to refute that line of thinking.

            Hope it didn’t come across too harsh cuz that definitely wasn’t my aim.

          • hehe

            Yea I def got the facetiousness of her comment after she mentioned Casey Anthony.

          • kaname

            I added on my quip just to say that most times when the issue of children arises either in a serious/humour type situation, the idea of a woman just not wanting children never seems to make the “list”. Plus Bumilla taking off the five inch heels nailed me!

          • Sula

            I read it the exact same way too! She was being facetious… at least that was the tone I read. I was even getting ready to add that it was already -19… so we probably dipped even lower than -19. :lol:

          • LMNOP

            Yeah. I’m pretty sure it was supposed to be funny, that if you rule out all the women over 30 who don’t have kids, plus all the women with kids, you have no elgible women over 30.
            I thought it was funny.

      • Yoles

        i took her post quite tongue in cheek…
        but just in case she wasn’t being facetious

        The Few
        The Proud
        The Childless By Choice
        Association Inc…

        membership has its privileges

        • Kidsister

          +1

          and high five on the membership privileges

        • http://twitter.com/tylerg_thomas tgtaggie

          Two questions
          Can get reward points (like cash back and sky points)?
          Are men eligible to join?

          • Yoles

            of course we’ll be expecting your application along with two references then you should be go to go tgtaggie… welcome

            • nillalatte

              I’ve noticed it’s easy to get accepted in clubs around here. You just have to make sure it’s the right club! :P

        • Todd

          Lemme see you for 20 minutes. I’ll ruin that club RIGHT quick…and leave you with a smile too. ;)

        • GypsyCurl

          I’m in! Where’s my memebership card?
          *Checking the mail box every 30 min*

          • http://fourpageletter.wordpress.com keisha brown

            right!??!
            *shakes fist a canada post

        • http://www.wildcougarconfessions.com Wild Cougar

          +2

        • Nei Jae

          membership DEFINITELY has it’s privileges!

      • Royale W. Cheese

        I was being super snarky, since I am a woman over 30 with no kids. Please don’t hit me with your shoe.

        • Todd

          Real talk though, a woman over 35 who hasn’t been in any sort of long-term relationship is a bit suspect to me. I’m wondering what have all those other men you’ve come across know that I don’t. Maybe there’s something really wrong there.

          • GirlSixx

            35??!!!! Hell I’ve heard men say women at 30 tend to get the side-eye and the how come questions.

            *smh*

            • Todd

              I say 35 because that’s usually the line in NYC. I know in other parts of the country it has to be lower. The best way you can spin that age thing is that you were so focused on your career that you didn’t date much. Even still, I’m wondering if you have a clue how to function in a relationship since you don’t have the practice.

              And if you went from relationship to relationship without none of those dudes wifing you up, I’m wondering what did all of those dudes see. Heck, I’d rather see a woman just h0 it up (with proper condom usage of course) than go from relationship to relationship like that. At least the hoochie is trying to have a good time, enjoy life, figuring out what interests her about dudes, then settle down. The serial monogamist has nary a clue what she wants or needs, and I’m not going to be the next lucky contestant. Fall back, learn something about yourself and those relationship, THEN step up.

              • http://mondaysbaby.com Monday’s Baby

                And if you went from relationship to relationship without none of those dudes wifing you up, I’m wondering what did all of those dudes see.

                Um, maybe she was the one who ended the relationships with them because they were’t right for her? Wow. What an assumption to make.

                As I’ve gotten older (I’m over 35), my guidelines regarding age have gotten much less rigid. Being a never-married woman with no children at 36 means to some people, I’m a freak or a statistic. And I’m neither of those. Generalizations can be helpful for discussing trends or issues on blogs, but really, it’s kind of messed up to project a narrative onto people based on externally imposed criteria.

                And one more question, why is serial monogamy so bad? Is it better to just date several people at one time for your adult life until you meet the one that’s right for you? How do you figure out if you want to be with someone, are truly compatible, etc. unless you have a deeper interaction with them? And yes, I’m all for stepping back and figuring out what you want, but even after you do that, it may still take time to find the person that delivers that. Just food for thought…

                • Todd

                  Excellent points all, and you’re right about generalizations. However, going from one relationship to another without stopping to think “gee, what went wrong?” is a problem. Also, if you have to keep kicking dudes to the curb, maybe your whole evaluation process is wrong. I don’t mean to put the burden on women on this, because it goes both ways. But if you can’t get it together to find someone worth sticking with…you got issues. :)

                  • http://mondaysbaby.com Monday’s Baby

                    And my point was, just because you deem someone a “serial monogamist” doesn’t mean that they’ve never taken a break from relationships or dating. Also, as I mentioned before, some things aren’t revealed until you get more involved with a person. I do agree with you that once you get very clear about what you want, you’ll cut a lot of potential suitors off after dates one or two. However, having said clarity and having relationships end (before they lead to marriage or long-term committment) are not mutually exclusive.

                    As one of my co-workers from long ago told me, “Keep on living.”

                  • http://mondaysbaby.com Monday’s Baby

                    And my point was, just because you deem someone a “serial monogamist” doesn’t mean that they’ve never taken a break from relationships or dating. Also, as I mentioned before, some things aren’t revealed until you get more involved with a person. I do agree with you that once you get very clear about what you want, you’ll cut a lot of potential suitors off after dates one or two. However, having said clarity and having relationships end (before they lead to marriage or long-term committment) are not mutually exclusive.

                    Also, meeting someone that is worth sticking with, that wants to stick with you, and that generates mutual chemistry that makes sticking together appealing is not about “picking the right one.” There’s kismet/luck/providence…whatever you want to call it involved. Again, you need to know more about a person than their “stats” to make a determination about why their not in a relationship. Not being married or partnered in a long-term committed relationship isn’t necessarily a sign of character flaws.

                    As one of my co-workers from long ago told me, “Keep on living.”

                • lm

                  “Being a never-married woman with no children at 36 means to some people, I’m a freak or a statistic.”

                  Even thought if you have your children before 35, you get flack for being an unmarried black babymomma.

                  Like MJ sang — can’t win, can’t break even, can’t get out of the game.

              • Alvin Milton

                I happen to know a couple of single women over 35 and they sho is some nuts. no shade tho to the less nutty over 35 year old queens to be. Coming to America.

          • Sula

            Real talk though, a woman over 35 who hasn’t been in any sort of long-term relationship is a bit suspect to me.

            But you can be in a long term relationship and not have kids though. Right?

            • Todd

              Of course! Kids are irrelevant to one’s eligibility. How you treat them if you DO have them is another story. Someone who treats a person who lived inside of them for 9 months like crap is going to do worse to me. :)

          • RG

            I would have to agree. The no kid above 30 things is accurate for the most part. I would say that the VSSs commenting here are the exceptions and not the rule. 30 seems to be the magic land where single women with out kids go to die. Of course, much of that is dictated by locale as well. My guess those of you in major metro areas like NYC, Chicago, houston, etc. have a higher percentage of over 30 childless catches.

          • Royale W. Cheese

            Didn’t say “never been in a relationship.” I’m talking about not having any kids yet. Dudes will preach all day and all night about how women need to avoid f*ckery. Please acknowledge that years of avoiding f*ckery by cutting off dead-end relationships, avoiding the “options” zone, and avoiding being a baby’s mama often results in a woman ver 30 who has never had kids. I’m not talking about alpha males and thugs, here. I’m talking about normal, quiet, below the radar dudes who want all the benefits the “dogs” enjoy, but still ain’t trying to get hitched.

            • http://mondaysbaby.com Monday’s Baby

              Exactamundo!

            • lm

              “Please acknowledge that years of avoiding f*ckery by cutting off dead-end relationships, avoiding the “options” zone, and avoiding being a baby’s mama often results in a woman ver 30 who has never had kids. ”

              PREACH.

        • ThatOneAKA

          Glad you clarified that :)
          Although, I ran into a not so smart brotha, after moving to the South, who had the gall to ask me if my “female parts” worked since I’m 30+ w/o children. He was especially concerned since I had been previously married. Some black people do plan on when to have children…

      • http://twitter.com/itztrizz617 Her Better Option

        u had me at 5 inch heels lol

      • http://www.greenafrodiva.com Green Afro Diva

        Hey, I thought everyone was in the BabyMomma club! Is it just me? Crap…..

        • Keisha

          @ Green Afro Diva

          No hun you are not the only one in this club…. I’m in the, I’d prefer, MILF club…redefined as a mother with kids who got it going on (not implying she’s a whore, etc)!! ….But just waiting for the world (eligible men) to “catch up” on that fact

          *sigh*

          Keep hope alive momma ;)

          lol

    • Adonis (@MOTRenaissance)

      @Royale W. Cheese & @all below…

      Divorced women & widows not included…

      If you are a unmarried childless woman over 30… Here are my assumptions

      - You played in the ALPHA MALE casino… And LOST!!! (Groupie, dead end relationship, whatever)
      - You are a career wh*re (which means high testosterone, which means a body count over 5)
      - You had abortions (Which reeks irresponsibillity, only 1% of women get abortions because of rape )

      You were thinking about being married with children, when it mattered the most… and I would avoid you like the plague at any age….

      More on this later…

      • randomeffery

        a body count over 5??? who are you tying to date, nuns?

        • http://twitter.com/MOTRenaissance Adonis (@MOTRenaissance)

          @Randomeffery

          I wanted to say 10-20, but 5 is too many partners for me… Granted I can compete… But IMH stupid Opinion…

          If a woman is checking for marriage, she should have her man by her third s*x partner… Any more men after that,

          YOU WERE NOT LOOKING TO GET MARRIED…

          And American Black Women based on the stats, do not take marriage seriously (last to get married, & divorce more than any other race of women)

        • http://fourpageletter.wordpress.com keisha brown

          just walk away randomeffery…just walk away…

          • k-steez

            lol, that’s exactly what i was thinking KB …”I hope nobody responds. I can’t handle a long thread of negativity right now.”

          • http://uphereoncloud9.wordpress.com Wu Young, Agent of M.E.

            Like I said on your blog conduct not count KB. I’m sticking to that.

            • http://twitter.com/MOTRenaissance Adonis (@MOTRenaissance)

              @Wu Young, Agent of M.E.

              LOL

            • http://fourpageletter.wordpress.com keisha brown

              and like i responded (and proof is being shown here) that you are not the majority in your thinking Wu!

              • http://uphereoncloud9.wordpress.com Wu Young, Agent of M.E.

                If a woman is 30 and has had multiple partners I can’t knock that. If a guy is dating a woman with multiple partners but is with him now exclusively all he has to worry about is if he is hitting it right. (I felt like a 20 year old typing “hitting it right”)

                Now if she mentions that she doesn’t remember what she did during Fleet Week of ’08 then that’s a conduct issue.

              • Sula

                I would think Wu’s line of thinking is the majority especially on VSB… The “other” seems to be in a minority (all by himself so far)… Do not fret, KB. :)

                • http://fourpageletter.wordpress.com keisha brown

                  *puts down fretting fan. ok sula.. i’ll try. ;)

        • GirlSixx

          *lol*

          either that or a young/middle aged divorcee or widow.

          They are out there.

    • Rick

      or maybe she used….*GASP*…..BIRTH CONTROL!!!!!
      or maybe she was never married and didn’t want to perpetuate the cycle of single motherhood!?!

      • http://fourpageletter.wordpress.com keisha brown

        ^^^^^!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    • Nei Jae

      “Okay, another filter…she’s over 30 and has never had kids. It means no one wanted to reproduce with her, she pulled a Casey Anthony, or she’s lying and having her kids secretly raised by nuns.”

      Or she decided that she doesn’t want to have kids (1) with men she’s dealt with in the past, (2) until she gets married, or (3) ever at all.

      Being 30+ with no kids is not a curse.

  • Kidsister

    I also think the good black women are at home writing letters/in the visiting halls of jails/having that 15 minute jail phone call to/with all the black dudes that are locked up.

  • http://zekjevets.blogspot.com Zek J Evets

    My Oakland neighbors like to joke that the reason they can’t find any good Black women is because my kosher-butt stole them.

    But then again, my girlfriend cries during The Color Purple, Love & Basketball, and even those damn Cotton commercials… So maybe she’s technically disqualified?

    • NessaLew

      Do you have a brother? #imjustsayin

  • Carolinagirl27

    I definitely think there are some ineligible women out there but it’s hard to define them by the same standards as mean I think. I think being a hoodrat makes you ineligible. And I don’t mean from the hood, I mean the true hoodrats. I also think that if a woman has ever knowingly made a man pay child support for a baby that wasn’t his takes them out of the game. Also, anyone that resembles Wendy Williams cuz I think she’s rupaul’s older brother.

    • xLadyTx

      That entire last sentence.

      LMAO

    • tgtaggie

      I’m pretty sure Wendy Williams was a tranny in her previous life. I think you might need to add basic chicks (yes there are college educated basic chicks) to the list.

      Also, I like your screen name (I’m from South Carolina. The home of Alvin Greene and Gov. Nikki Haley. lol)

      • Carolinagirl27

        Yea you are right about basic chicks! I went to school with a ton of them and they are still basic as hell!! Gotta love SC, I spent half of my life there and now I’m NC, SC’s bougie cousin! Lol

        • http://twitter.com/tylerg_thomas tgtaggie

          I actually went to school in NC (They have the best homecoming on earth. lol). You got the bougie part right on NC compared to SC. lol.

          • Carolinagirl27

            Where at? I graduated from Winston Salem State univ. And it’s homecoming this week! Go Rams!

            • http://twitter.com/tylerg_thomas tgtaggie

              Two words….Aggie Pride!! I have a cousin that plays football there as WSSU (he’s a sophomore). Our homecoming is in two weeks (I can’t wait).

          • Tichelle

            aggie born, aggie bred….

            C/O ’07

            • Mo to tha

              ….and when i’m gone i’ll be aggie dead. (c/o ’06)

              Sidenote: I can’t wait for homecoming…esp since my sister has been reppin for the fam hard in aggieland.

              Back to the topic….

              I consider myself a ‘good, single, black woman’ however I know my single status is all on me. I don’t go out enough to meet someone. Ontop of that, according to my mom, plenty of men show interest while i’m out and about but i’m oblivious. I need more overt attention b/c if not i just assume its southern hospitality….le sigh for me and my alleged obliviousness

            • ncvirgogal

              Aggie Pride!! C/o 08 #GHOE

      • Yoles

        can i please get a working definition of basic chick and how does she differ from the typical hoodrat or ratchet?!?

        • tgtaggie

          As per urban dictionary:

          Likened to children, a ‘basic’ is a term used to describe someone with attributes of idiocy, foolishness and child-like behaviour. A ‘basic’ commonly has little to no intelligence, and struggles to break social barriers. A ‘basic’ often reverts to exaggeration and deceit to over come these social barriers and gain a mild sense of acceptance within his/her friendship circles.
          Mr Jones: ‘I love my barbie doll she so poe’

          Mrs Smith: ‘ You are ridiculous, obscene and basic’

          Mr Jones jnr: ‘Daddy I want a car and I want it now!’
          Mr Jones snr: ‘Shut up you spoilt child, I hate your basic demands’

          • hehe

            hmm… I guess my sister qualifies as a basic chick then.

          • Royale W. Cheese

            Is this the same as “simple/ simpleton?” i.e., “Did I just die and go to simple b*tch hell?” ~Awkward Black Girl

            • http://www.6monthsto30.wordpress.com chunk

              “Did I just die and go to simple b*tch hell?”

              That was *the* best line ever.

          • Chanelle

            lmao! I’ve always known what a basic chick was but never actually able to defined it this way for others and I love the fact you gave examples lol- this will probably make it to my facebook at some point today.

        • Kidsister

          Many of these definitions are of hoodrats. While there is a thin line between the two, there is distinguishable difference. A basic chick is an unratchet hoodrat.The ratchetness is what seperates the two.

      • hehe

        What is the qualifiers for a basic chick?

        • Carolinagirl27

          So in laymans terms a basic chick is one that still does the childish things that she did at 18-23 and is now 30. Here are some examples: Putting your business out there not realizing it will bite you in the ass, staying fly but have no pot to piss in, having multiple baby daddys w/o any marriages or is unsure of the paternity of any of said children, thinking that a man that takes you to chilis and let’s you get an el presidente margarita is doing it big, chicks that steal other women men but are surprised when they cheat,And just not being on your grown woman ish, etc, etc, etc.

          • Mo-VSS

            In short, a basic chick is the one of Facebook who puts her business out, has the “realtalkalldayeveryday” middle name in her FB profile, is half naked in her profile pics and is a mother…who never posts pics of her kids and never speaks of them because she has an “image” to project.

            Can’t get too much more basic than that.

            • http://twitter.com/tylerg_thomas tgtaggie

              Pretty much….

            • nillalatte

              “has the “realtalkalldayeveryday” middle name in her FB profile”

              ROTFLMAO!!! I think there are at least 2 of these basic chicks on my FB… OMG… LOL… I am so gonna call them out!

              • http://www.wildcougarconfessions.com Wild Cougar

                I call them the middle name girls. LOL

            • TheRealestLeo

              …And the ones who type their lowercase g’s like q’s.

      • http://uphereoncloud9.wordpress.com Wu Young, Agent of M.E.

        I almost forgot about Alvin Greene.

    • Adonis (@MOTRenaissance)

      @Carloina27@above…

      Please define hoodrat & basic, so I can be on the same page…

    • Todd

      Preach on the hoodrat/in the hood distinction. There are plenty of decent people who were born in the hood trying to make it the best they can under the circumstances. They might live in hood ways, but they have solid values underneath it all, and it shows when you deal with them. A hoodrat lives for the hood and has nothing worthwhile underneath is all. As a result, all they value is hood foolishness, not realizing there is a world beyond the BS.

      Oh, and preach on about the Basic Chick. They’re a damn epidemic.