Nine Thoughts On Rihanna’s “Work” Vid From Someone Actually Qualified To Share Thoughts On It » VSB

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Nine Thoughts On Rihanna’s “Work” Vid From Someone Actually Qualified To Share Thoughts On It

Roc Nation screenshot

 

A few weeks after the clusterfuck that was the Anti release (shout out the newly-unemployed Tidal team member who tripped and hit the big red button hours before he or she was supposed to), Rih Rih decided to bless us with some choice visuals for her first single “Work” and did not disappoint in delivering the dancehall-inspired bashment scene that I had fantasized on upon my first listen.

(Can we briefly discuss Anti as a project? I was pleasantly surprised by the effort. Totally not the direction I expected Robyn Fenty to take, but her decision to trend away from being just a singles artist in favor of putting together a cohesive project was a risk that I think worked in her favor. Rih got tired of us dragging her for her limited singing range, got herself a vocal coach, and gave us some ballads! It was altogether a lovely experience. Except for Higher. Higher is an act of violence that I like to pretend never happened).

Imagine my glee when I discovered that our Bajan Princess of IDGAF bless us with not one video, but two! This was far and away the highlight of my day, and that’s including finding some forgotten chocolate chip cookie dough in my freezer.

A few takeaways from the approximately 34293428429384 times I’ve played it:

1. All I need in this life of sin…is for a man to look at me with the same fervor as Rihanna looks at herself in the mirror. Lord knows if I looked like Rihanna, I’d be giving sex face to myself all the live-long day.

2. The group dance cutaways interspersed throughout the first video remind me of when my friends and I would create “crews” in high school that would do routines to dancehall jams in the club. We called ourself the Divas and you couldn’t tell us that our Nuh Linga wasn’t unfuckwitable. RIP Club Exit.

3. Shout out to ole’ girl working the chicken at 2:14. Post-bashment jerk is a necessity when you spent the bulk of your evening sweating out your leave out and mesh top.

4. Drake is showing up to the party in a sweatsuit? That’s more out of place than Jaheim’s get up at Whitney Houston’s funeral. As a matter of fact, he might as well shown up to the party in a suit, it’s about as practical for the festivities that ensued as a thick cotton full-body getup is for a packed-sweaty dance floor.

5. Speaking of our Canadian friend…Aubrey cannot dance worth a lick. Wow! If it’s not the same ole two-step, the man can’t find the beat if he had Google Maps’ step-by-step directions.

6. Two big thumbs up to the girl at 2:04 doing what I am pretty sure is the fastest recorded puppy tail in life. My puppy tail is currently more of a slow dramatic wag, but still I rise.

7. Also, props to the lovely lady in leopard print doing splits across the dance floor. Last time I did a singular split was in Negril in lower manhattan a little over a year ago. My inner thighs ached for a solid three days after. Getting old can be terrible.

8. Rihanna has me reconsidering my five year-plus long ban on middle parts. My sister in forehead real-estate pulled off an effortless middle part not once but TWICE. Is the mesh top the key to this? I need answers!

9. What do you think the average straight male would give up to be Drake on the couch in the second video? No X-box for a month? How about SportsCenter? Wings? Crispy Chicken Wraps? I’d wager that most would be willing to go bacon-free for a full season.

Needless to say, Rihanna delivered better than the Papa John’s worker who refuses to come upstairs*. In the barren winter expanse that is New York City, this glimmer of color and proper dancehall-infused pop (all shade to Bieber’s current sound transformation, ‘tropical house-flavored’ my ass) has me hotly anticipating throwing on my pum-pum shorts and crop top for the Brooklyn summer house party season.

*But seriously, the main reason I order delivery is because I’m too lazy to put on pants on to grab food, making me put on pants to come downstairs defeats the whole purpose.

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Shamira Ibrahim

Shamira is a twentysomething New Yorker who likes all things Dipset. You can join her in waxing poetically about chicken, Cam'ron, and gentrification (gotta have some balance) under the influence of varying amounts of brown liquor at her semi-monthly blog, shamspam.tumblr.com

  • Keisha

    “Drake is showing up to the party in a sweatsuit?”
    I’m so glad you mentioned this!!! I kept waiting on him to take off the sweater so the video would make more sense…but nothing. :-/

    • TJ

      Drake could have done with a t-shirt, instead of the sweatshirt because he was probably roasting. However; as a proud member of the soca / dancehall scene in NYC, you does see some men wearing sweatpants to the fete or bashment so they get a pass (at times).

      • RewindingtonMaximus

        For a dude from Toronto…he sure act like he don’t know nothing about Toronto.

        • TJ

          Maybe he isn’t truly familiar with the Caribbean side of Toronto. It’s possible as there are plenty of New Yorkers who aren’t on the” Caribbean scene” so to speak.

          • RewindingtonMaximus

            I’m just saying…before Kardinal Offishal and all of the Sean Paul videos back in the day, a lot of people didn’t even realize how big the Black population was in T-dot, let alone the Carribean connection. I get he’s not West Indian in anyway, but I just feel like one his claims to fame for repping the city is being in the know about everything.

          • nah he is. he stay in jamaica and performing with dancehall artists. his dj (or one of) is a dancehall dj

          • anyanwu banda

            There’s only a Caribbean side in Toronto.

      • Duh one does mek meh rell cross tuh rahtid!!

    • Ess Tee

      Especially given how Drake’s entire 2015 was alllll about those IG thirst traps. Sir, what are you doing in a party video in a sweater? At the very least rock that shmedium tee you no doubt have underneath it.

      • Keisha

        Lol…exactly!!!

    • LyricMeThis

      I almost couldn’t make it through the video!! A full sweat suit hoodie and everythang…really?!?!

  • Tonja (aka Cheeks)

    Yaaasssss! Oh! The part where she looks back at Drake on the couch and sticks out her tongue SPOKE TO ME. Because I also steal souls on the dance floor. Mmmmmmmmmm…

    • Keisha

      LOL…I just told a friend the other day that I missed sweating my hair out dancing.

      • Tiffany Green

        ?my .friend’s mate Is getting 98$. HOURLY. on the internet.”….two days ago new McLaren. F1 bought after earning 18,512$,,,this was my previous month’s paycheck ,and-a little over, 17k$ Last month .,3-5 h/r of work a days ..with extra open doors & weekly. paychecks.. it’s realy the easiest work I have ever Do.. I Joined This 7 months ago and now making over 87$, p/h.Learn. More right Here!!b962????? http://GlobalSuperEmploymentVacanciesReportsLife/GetPaid/98$hourly…. .?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:::::!!b962…….

      • Shirley Rojas

        ?my .friend’s mate Is getting 98$. HOURLY. on the internet.”….two days ago new McLaren. F1 bought after earning 18,512$,,,this was my previous month’s paycheck ,and-a little over, 17k$ Last month ..3-5 h/r of work a days ..with extra open doors & weekly. paychecks.. it’s realy the easiest work I have ever Do.. I Joined This 7 months ago and now making over 87$, p/h.Learn. More right Here!!b90????? http://GlobalSuperEmploymentVacanciesReportsTime/GetPaid/98$hourly…. .?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:::::!!b90…..

      • Michelle Warren

        ?my .friend’s mate Is getting 98$. HOURLY. on the internet.”….two days ago new McLaren. F1 bought after earning 18,512$,,,this was my previous month’s paycheck ,and-a little over, 17k$ Last month ..3-5 h/r of work a days ..with extra open doors & weekly. paychecks.. it’s realy the easiest work I have ever Do.. I Joined This 7 months ago and now making over 87$, p/h.Learn. More right Here!!b735????? http://GlobalSuperEmploymentVacanciesReportsCrowd/GetPaid/98$hourly…. .?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:::::!!b735…

      • Dorthyepeeler4

        ?my .friend’s mate Is getting 98$. HOURLY. on the internet.”….two days ago new McLaren. F1 bought after earning 18,512$,,,this was my previous month’s paycheck ,and-a little over, 17k$ Last month ..3-5 h/r of work a days ..with extra open doors & weekly. paychecks.. it’s realy the easiest work I have ever Do.. I Joined This 7 months ago and now making over 87$, p/h.Learn. More right Here`!b37????? http://GlobalSuperEmploymentVacanciesReportsMoney/GetPaid/98$hourly…. .?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:::::`!b37…….

      • Akikoismith

        ?my .friend’s mate Is getting 98$. HOURLY. on the internet.”….two days ago new McLaren. F1 bought after earning 18,512$,,,this was my previous month’s paycheck ,and-a little over, 17k$ Last month ..3-5 h/r of work a days ..with extra open doors & weekly. paychecks.. it’s realy the easiest work I have ever Do.. I Joined This 7 months ago and now making over 87$, p/h.Learn. More right Here`!b295????? http://GlobalSuperEmploymentVacanciesReportsBest/GetPaid/98$hourly…. .?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:?2:::::`!b295…

    • TheCollinB

      Listen man, a tender look back at me like Rhianna looked over her shoulder at Drake on the couch….shorty i’ma make you RUN. IT.

    • Conrad Bess

      I don’t know if there is a GIF in the world that can describe ladies like you. Please please please use those powers for good…

  • TJ

    4. I like the sweatsuit outfit. Any man can come in grey suits to any informal function I’m having in the future.

    5. Drake really can’t dance. But look at him? Does he have to know how to dance?

    8. Rihanna has one of those oval heads that compliments every hairstyle. SIGH!

    Overall, I need to practice my wine in preparation for the summer months.

    Someone said Barbadian the other day. I almost caught a charge. ALMOST!

    The album itself…I enjoyed it. I hadn’t listen to a Rihanna album in full until Anti. Same ol’ mistakes is my shield against fu%kbois. Yay!

    • Jennifer

      4. Yeah. Could he have a few less basic moves? It would be nice to do something with him on a dance floor than just have him press up on my butt. How old is he again?

      Agreed about the album. Same ol’ Mistakes is my jam!

    • RewindingtonMaximus

      Barbadian?

      Kick that person in the knee caps

      • I’m Todd and I approve this message.

      • anyanwu banda

        Violence *is* the only logical answer in this situation.

    • Ess Tee

      Same on not listening to a full Rihanna album. Whatever played on the radio is what I knew of her.

      I’m really enjoying Anti.

      • CheGueverraWitBlingOn

        Yeah..i listened to the whole album. I know that sounds like a tautology, but I mean…all the way through.

        • Ess Tee

          100 emoji for saying “tautology.” :)

    • JAC

      Yes to 5. No one expects Drake to have moves but if he can body roll that’s fine.

    • Are you a fellow Bajan? What Parish?

      • Tambra

        Wuh loss, gosh the Bajan real strong. Once you ask Parish…?

        • Me have a Yankee mother but mi fadduh taught me about his roots as a black man.

      • TJ

        I’m Haitian. But I’ll catch a case for anyone who says Barbadian. Lmao.

        • Sak pase! I’ll give White people and clearly Southern Blacks one pass, but if you grew up on the east coast… NOPE.

          • TJ

            Nap Boule! Being a New Yorker who now claims the South…it’s a process. A lot of educating to do…

        • God Shammgod

          *jigs to the Steel Drum breakdown in zouk la se sel medikaman nou ni*

    • Leggy

      Same ol’ mistake is actually a cover of a song by the band Impala that came out last year. Rihanna basically sings over their voices if you listen to the track. You should totally check out the original.

      • TJ

        Oooh. I need to check that out. Thanks!

      • miss t-lee

        *Tame Impala

    • God Shammgod

      People keep telling me that Drake is fine now, I just think he looks like a castmember Shahs of Sunset. Nothing wrong with being into that though.

    • Qris_10

      #5. NOPE

    • Ganesha86

      Actually Barbadian is just as correct as Bajan

      • Tambra

        Bajan is more colloquial.

  • Jennifer

    BTW – that screenshot you chose is a perfect encapsulation of their relationship. Rih Rih unbothered; Aubrey trying to do the most.

  • JAC

    I love this video…and yes I am in love with “Anti.” I had to put it on pause because I was wearing it OWT!!! Rih put forth some effort and it was worth the wait. I actually like Higher a lot. There is something about the way she is singing that I appreciate. I mean I’m cool with Elle Varner being screechy sometimes, so I guess Rih gets the pass from me.

  • brothaskeeper

    Sweats in a Jamaican club = not the worst idea, since one does perspire considerably in a dancehall.
    Was that a nipple, or a shadow of a nipple?
    That was a nipple……’cause I’m drooling.

  • LadyIbaka

    Why was Drake in the video?!??? There are so many talented men with looks. Urrrgh. He is not enticing at all, beard or no beard.

    • AnswerMe

      He’s so awkward looking like he was supposed to be attractive and something didn’t quite work out in his favor.

      • LadyIbaka

        He is not attractive.

        • Is it because he looks like a lemur?

          • Tambra

            That’s harsh. You know attractiveness is relative, I think….

            • Lemurs aren’t necessarily ugly animals.

            • Brass Tacks

              What is with “relative” attractiveness being the hot word around here.

              • Lea Thrace

                everything aint for everybody

                • PhlyyPhree

                  He ain’t for nobody

                  • Lea Thrace

                    I’ll take Aubrey. I have a thing for sensitive light skinned men who look like a thumb if you turn your head the right angle…

              • Tambra

                Ahh, I have seen people melt over some persons who I was like ugghhh

          • LadyIbaka

            You need Jeaus.

            • call his name for me.

              • Lea Thrace

                !!!

          • AnswerMe

            Hit the nail on the head.

    • tgtaggie

      I honestly think that Aubrey will be the dude that wifes her. His awkward, corny a** is going to slow walk her down .

      • LadyIbaka

        Oh please.

      • Gbadebo

        …maybe 10 years from now
        Rih is in no hurry….and maaaaaan is that attractive, ha

  • MissG

    I LOVE Higher. It’s so wonderfully terrible. & look at Drake…looking as Drake as he wanna be.

  • First, Barbados. Nuff said.

    Two, I wanna go back there. Though I realize that even though Bajan blood runs through me, my game is a bigger Yankee than Derek Jeter in 1999.

    Three, that Bajan flag bandana makes me smile.

    Four, even though my dad has a decided preference for American women, I think if I somehow bagged Rihanna, I’d be the man for life for finally returning to my roots.

    Five, my dad STILL asks me about my one photo with Shamira. Lord knows why. LOL

    • Epsilonicus

      You need to share that photo with Sham. Ijs

    • just booked my flight to barbados this morning!!! tun up

  • KMN

    How y’all gone sleep on Kiss It Better? That song exudes so much secks I can’t stand it…and I LURVE Rihanna…she’s probably the seckiest thing rolling right now…and Anti is awesome…just queued it up a few seconds ago

    • God Shammgod

      I really like the song, but I can’t help thinking it’s a Miguel B-Side.

      • KMN

        OK i’ll ride with that ma’am…but for me KIB made the album for me…and she was trying on Higher she really was…I think she was just really high when she sang it and thought she could hit those notes lmao but she still did good

        • mssporadic

          I planned to ignore the album until everyone picked KIB as their fav on twitter. It is on constant repeat. Love it!

    • CheGueverraWitBlingOn

      Yeah, that song is bedroom work.

      • KMN

        yes YES It is….lol

        • Sigma_Since 93

          Hey gurl….I need a refill of that sweet stuff. You got me???

          • KMN

            Actually I’m sending you out a package this weekend…and it’s on me because I’ve had you waiting lmao…it’s been a ROUGH few months here…but the one after that is all you lmao…

            • Sigma_Since 93

              How I reacted when you said it’s on me.

              I hope things get better out that way. Sending you good vibes.

              • KMN

                It’s starting to get a little better….but it’s stressful…I need someone to give me an extra week of vacation LMAO…and I KNEW you and your boys were missing the joy of syrup sammiches…and for that I apologize lmao…but I got you and you’re a fool lolol

    • Yeah I Said It is fiyyyaaahhhh

      • KMN

        OMG ain’t it tho?! she talking all the $hit in that one lol…needed me is another one she went off on a little be…”didn’t they tell you that I was a savage…eff your white horse and your carriage…” UGH I love her lmao

        • I swear she wrote that song for me. It’s like she knew me in a former life, looked at me today and said “Here you go, boo. Needed Me.”

          And funny, when I was trying to download the album, that track and one more were the only ones that wouldn’t write onto my computer for some reason. I had to do mad stuff to finally get it and I’m glad I did.

          • KMN

            listen I was WAITING for it to pop up on spotify….when I heard that…I was in love with this chick all over again…and surprised because the whole album is SO GOOD..God knew what he was doing…trying to keep you from going into your old ways LMAO

            • I legit had a moment in the car on like my 3rd time listening to the album. When she said “tryna fix your inner issues with a bad bish” I turned the volume up to 40 (max) and screamed out “YOU BETTER SING THAT S HIT RIHANNA GATDAMN!!!”

              The universe was looking out for the kid. I’m grateful lol

              • KMN

                she’s telling ALL the truth on this album…I’ve likened her album to a hood millennials MJB My Life…y’all can fight me on that one but I’m gonna stand my ground lol….

                • I will take this because I agree with it.

                  • KMN

                    Ma’am I appreciate the support lol

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