Theory & Essay

Muffin.

Men do evil.

It’s sometimes referred to as the evil that men do.

I’m sure you’ve heard of it.

The men who do evil, who are notoriously famous for being the executors of the evil that men do, tend to be the rue of the Earth.

Let’s see. There was Hitler. No explanation needed there. There was Jim Jones, who along with his misgivings as a crazed lunatic who convinced hundreds of people to die in Guyana (not Panama), is responsible for making a ghetto brand a household name. For it is Jim Jones who caused the coinage of the now age-old adage, “You won’t get me to drink that Kool-Aid.”

The downside there is that Kool-Aid, on its own merits isn’t exactly a nutritious morning supplement, but still, it’s Kool-Aid. How can you ruin Kool-Aid for everybody by killing people with it? That’s just evil.

As you can see, the whole Kool-Aid things really bothers me.

You’re probably thinking to yourself right now, “Self, what in the hell is this uber-sexxy fellow speaking of?”

A-ha.

Well, amongst the throngs of evildoers who have passed over this Earth, there are a few men (and women) who do not get enough attention for their evil deeds. And I for one don’t think that’s fair. As any God-fearing, justice driven individual would do, I feel that it is my duty to bring those deeds to the limelight. I’m speaking of the creators of…

…low-rise jeans.

Evil.

Maybe it’s just me, but a cool 97% of women who wear low-rise jeans needn’t wear low-rise jeans.

In America, we have a problem. We tend to be largely out of shape. Low-rise jeans exploit this losing effort in the Battle of The Bulge by causing women who know good and got damn well that they have no business wearing anything that will accentuate their mid-sections to wear them and mushroom around their jeans. I mean extra back fat and shit that forms a muffin-top like effect surrounding the jeans.

Essentially I’ve seen women walking around looking like mushrooms.

And that is just wrong.

Granted it’s mostly younger white women who seem to not get the memo on when it is appropriate to wear certain clothing, but I’ve seen black women do it.

And even worse, I’ve seen MEN wearing low-rise jeans. And I don’t mean ninjas sagging either.

So yes, low-rise jeans and their creators are just evil. They know that women want to expose themselves. So women will continue walking around looking like mushrooms, making fashion faux pas after fashion faux pas.

It’s just not sexxy. And it counters that whole, “I don’t want to look fat” mantra that so many women wear so proudly. Know your body and know your limitations. It’s one thing to not care what people think. I applaud that spirit. It’s something altogether to not care what people think at the detriment of other people. Not wearing deodorant, or not bathing regularly, or not being able to wash clothes comes to mind. I can’t not look at a chick with her midriff exposed — especially if it makes me want to go buy some fungus.

Don’t you see the evil here?

For the legions of women who can wear low-rise jeans, keep bangin’. You are a testament to gyms or good genes everywhere. I appreciate seeing your thongs and the way your jeans hang off your hips. In fact, thank you for having discernible hips. It’s clearly an art, not a right.

But for those who cannot. Just perish. Panama says just perish.

We’re nearing Christmas, do the world some justice and let the world know other fashion faux pas that men and women need to do away with.

Sharing is caring, people.

Share.

-VSB P aka THE ARSONIST aka TANGLE JIG P

Filed Under:
Panama Jackson

Panama Jackson is pretty fly (and gorgeous) for a light guy. He used to ship his frito to Tito in the District, but shipping prices increased so he moved there to save money. He refuses to eat cocaine chicken. When he's not saving humanity with his words or making music with his mouth, you can find him at your mama's mama's house drinking her fine liquors. Most importantly, he believes the children are our future. Gorgeous P out. *drops mic*

Previously

Boot Up.

  • Panama I realize you love yourself and your sexxxy but Jim Jones used Kool Aid to kill himslef and a whole lot of folks in Guyana not Panama

    • @Intellectual Hedonist,

      Yuppp… Jonestown was a tragic story. I always watch the documentary when it comes on. That was one twisted man.

    • @Intellectual Hedonist,

      Yuppp… Jonestown was a tragic story. I always watch the documentary when it comes on. That was one twisted man.

    • PBG

      @Intellectual Hedonist,

      IH didn’t drink PeeJay’s Kool-Aid! Haa-Ha!

      • @PBG, Initially I thought he was talking bout the other Jim Jones, you know the one we VSBers blame for all that is wrong in this world today

        • @Intellectual Hedonist,

          thats who i thought too!

          *pop champagne*

          • charli skipper

            @shatani, lol. when i heard “pop champagne” the first time i actually liked it, and kinda thought it was kanye and somebody. the next time i was in my car and heard it–and heard the d.j. say that was jim jones–i involuntarily shrieked and slammed my radio off, whilst scratching the contact-dirt off myself. yeesssssss……he’s evil.

            • @charli skipper, I already know you (and the rest of the VSB population) will hate me for what I’m about write…but oh well, get in line :-P

              I hate Jim Jones too, but I’ll be damned if his verse on “Pop Champagne” isn’t my sh*t!!!…and since I’m in Harlem damn near urrr weekend, I feel it even more…if anything you have to be entertained by the pure niggery of his delivery and of course, his adlibs.

              When I go to the dealer, you know I cop that (what’s that?)
              Brand new ‘Rari and the roof dropped back (360)
              Came thru Harlem like the rooftop back (a yo!)
              Money in the bank man you know I stop that (stop that stop that stop that)
              Now we tryin’ to get up in the club (what?)
              They tryin’ to tell me “no”
              ‘Cause I’m rollin’ with the thugs (we got money b*tch!)
              So I flash a couple o’ dollars (yup)
              Told ’em “we only want tables”
              “And we buyin out the bottles” (o oohhh)
              And y’all know the order, I told ’em
              “Ten Roses and a few cold waters” (right!)
              Trony ‘Tron and a couple of lemons (go!)
              Ten Thousand Dollars stuffed up my denims (what else?)
              Standing on couches, couple of womens (aye baby)
              We was ballin hard, it was just the 9th inning (it’s early)
              Told shorty we could be friends (yup)
              And your friends could meet my friends (what else?)
              We could do this on a weekend or on a weekday (oh)
              We could do this on the freeway (go)
              Get it in a freak way
              Sh*t you could get all three ways (oooh)
              Blackberry two way
              Souped up cars on the thru-way (yup)
              We superstars, no Lupe
              We could do this like a duet (oh)
              Y’all be the singers, I’m the mic (unh)
              Let me dim the lights (unh)
              This was in the car when I was stopping at the light (take that)

              • miss t-lee

                @Cornell Westside,
                I can’t even hate on Jim.
                I hate to admit, I really like this song…lol

              • miss t-lee

                @Cornell Westside,
                I can’t even hate on Jim.
                I hate to admit, I really like this song…lol

              • @Cornell Westside,

                sadly, i too liked this song… then i found out it was Dirt Boys… I will not listen to it strickly on principle.

                yeah, it beez like that

              • @Cornell Westside,

                sadly, i too liked this song… then i found out it was Dirt Boys… I will not listen to it strickly on principle.

                yeah, it beez like that

              • PBG

                @Cornell Westside,

                I am not at all familiar w/this song.

              • PBG

                @Cornell Westside,

                I am not at all familiar w/this song.

              • @Cornell Westside,

                you know, ive never even heard this song, but now i’m tempted to find it online somewhere

              • @Cornell Westside,

                you know, ive never even heard this song, but now i’m tempted to find it online somewhere

              • @Cornell Westside,

                Never heard it either. Hum.

              • @Cornell Westside,

                Never heard it either. Hum.

              • y’all ain’t heard this??! its in HEAVY rotation ’round these parts… *sigh*

              • y’all ain’t heard this??! its in HEAVY rotation ’round these parts… *sigh*

              • i’m amazed at anybody who ain’t heard this yet…especially on the east coast.

                its got a video complete with a bunch of men…spraying champagne on eachother.

                its the club jumpoff song right now…

              • i’m amazed at anybody who ain’t heard this yet…especially on the east coast.

                its got a video complete with a bunch of men…spraying champagne on eachother.

                its the club jumpoff song right now…

              • @Cornell Westside,

                im not nearly as principled as BBMo! lmao…i like it. i cant help myself.

              • @Cornell Westside,

                im not nearly as principled as BBMo! lmao…i like it. i cant help myself.

              • “its got a video complete with a bunch of men…spraying champagne on eachother.”

                *raised eyebrow*

                hmmmmm that reminds me of the Boondocks episode “The Story of Gangstalicious, Part 2”

                “Homies Over Ho*s”

              • “its got a video complete with a bunch of men…spraying champagne on eachother.”

                *raised eyebrow*

                hmmmmm that reminds me of the Boondocks episode “The Story of Gangstalicious, Part 2”

                “Homies Over Ho*s”

              • Intellectual Hedonist

                @Cornell Westside, I liked the song too when I heard it on the radio I was like yo that’s hot and would turn it up, then one afternoon the dj said Jim Jones and played the song. I immediately ripped out the radio and threw it out the window.

              • Intellectual Hedonist

                @Cornell Westside, I liked the song too when I heard it on the radio I was like yo that’s hot and would turn it up, then one afternoon the dj said Jim Jones and played the song. I immediately ripped out the radio and threw it out the window.

            • @charli skipper, I already know you (and the rest of the VSB population) will hate me for what I’m about write…but oh well, get in line :-P

              I hate Jim Jones too, but I’ll be damned if his verse on “Pop Champagne” isn’t my sh*t!!!…and since I’m in Harlem damn near urrr weekend, I feel it even more…if anything you have to be entertained by the pure niggery of his delivery and of course, his adlibs.

              When I go to the dealer, you know I cop that (what’s that?)
              Brand new ‘Rari and the roof dropped back (360)
              Came thru Harlem like the rooftop back (a yo!)
              Money in the bank man you know I stop that (stop that stop that stop that)
              Now we tryin’ to get up in the club (what?)
              They tryin’ to tell me “no”
              ‘Cause I’m rollin’ with the thugs (we got money b*tch!)
              So I flash a couple o’ dollars (yup)
              Told ’em “we only want tables”
              “And we buyin out the bottles” (o oohhh)
              And y’all know the order, I told ’em
              “Ten Roses and a few cold waters” (right!)
              Trony ‘Tron and a couple of lemons (go!)
              Ten Thousand Dollars stuffed up my denims (what else?)
              Standing on couches, couple of womens (aye baby)
              We was ballin hard, it was just the 9th inning (it’s early)
              Told shorty we could be friends (yup)
              And your friends could meet my friends (what else?)
              We could do this on a weekend or on a weekday (oh)
              We could do this on the freeway (go)
              Get it in a freak way
              Sh*t you could get all three ways (oooh)
              Blackberry two way
              Souped up cars on the thru-way (yup)
              We superstars, no Lupe
              We could do this like a duet (oh)
              Y’all be the singers, I’m the mic (unh)
              Let me dim the lights (unh)
              This was in the car when I was stopping at the light (take that)

          • charli skipper

            @shatani, lol. when i heard “pop champagne” the first time i actually liked it, and kinda thought it was kanye and somebody. the next time i was in my car and heard it–and heard the d.j. say that was jim jones–i involuntarily shrieked and slammed my radio off, whilst scratching the contact-dirt off myself. yeesssssss……he’s evil.

          • @shatani, miss t-lee, Cornell Westside, and charlie skipper,

            The song is a banger…there’s no other way to look at it. I wrote about it on my blog a couple of weeks ago:

            http://my2cents-sense.blogspot.com/2008/11/my-favorite-song-right-now-part-two.html

            One can hate Jim Jones all they want, but if you hate on this song, you clearly have hate running through your blood.

            • miss t-lee

              @Monk,
              Yep…we’ve discussed this…it’s hot. I can’t even front…lol

              • @miss t-lee,

                which is not to say that i dont have hate running through my blood, though. my cup runneth over and shyt.

              • @miss t-lee,

                which is not to say that i dont have hate running through my blood, though. my cup runneth over and shyt.

            • miss t-lee

              @Monk,
              Yep…we’ve discussed this…it’s hot. I can’t even front…lol

            • charli skipper

              @Monk,
              One can hate Jim Jones all they want, but if you hate on this song, you clearly have hate running through your blood.

              LOL!! this is remixed version of what i tell people about beyonce.

            • charli skipper

              @Monk,
              One can hate Jim Jones all they want, but if you hate on this song, you clearly have hate running through your blood.

              LOL!! this is remixed version of what i tell people about beyonce.

          • @shatani, miss t-lee, Cornell Westside, and charlie skipper,

            The song is a banger…there’s no other way to look at it. I wrote about it on my blog a couple of weeks ago:

            http://my2cents-sense.blogspot.com/2008/11/my-favorite-song-right-now-part-two.html

            One can hate Jim Jones all they want, but if you hate on this song, you clearly have hate running through your blood.

          • @Champ & PBG….what rock have y’all been living under? You are missing out on some good niggotry.

            http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7jZmntdzFBY&feature=related

            things to take note of:
            1. The heavily-weaved young woman recklessly pouring ‘pagne in the beginning

            2. the bootleg Keyshia Cole video chick

            3. Jim Jones’ ski-goggles and skullie, nucca it is NOT the 90’s!

            • @Cornell Westside,

              “3. Jim Jones’ ski-goggles and skullie, nucca it is NOT the 90’s!”

              maybe he was just cold.

            • @Cornell Westside,

              “3. Jim Jones’ ski-goggles and skullie, nucca it is NOT the 90’s!”

              maybe he was just cold.

          • @Champ & PBG….what rock have y’all been living under? You are missing out on some good niggotry.

            http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7jZmntdzFBY&feature=related

            things to take note of:
            1. The heavily-weaved young woman recklessly pouring ‘pagne in the beginning

            2. the bootleg Keyshia Cole video chick

            3. Jim Jones’ ski-goggles and skullie, nucca it is NOT the 90’s!

        • @Intellectual Hedonist,

          thats who i thought too!

          *pop champagne*

        • @Intellectual Hedonist, yeah me too…that was until I remembered the other Jim Jones, who I initially thought they meant when they were talking about the Dirty Angel…these guys need to a learn a little thing called consistency up in here, lol.

        • @Intellectual Hedonist, yeah me too…that was until I remembered the other Jim Jones, who I initially thought they meant when they were talking about the Dirty Angel…these guys need to a learn a little thing called consistency up in here, lol.

        • @Intellectual Hedonist, you can add him too…somehow that Jim Jones is responsible.

        • @Intellectual Hedonist, you can add him too…somehow that Jim Jones is responsible.

      • @PBG, Initially I thought he was talking bout the other Jim Jones, you know the one we VSBers blame for all that is wrong in this world today

    • PBG

      @Intellectual Hedonist,

      IH didn’t drink PeeJay’s Kool-Aid! Haa-Ha!

    • AO

      @Intellectual Hedonist, I was going to throw that out too; of course the only reason I’m up on this little tidbit of information, wait for it, a brutha is seriously trapped in Germany and CNN International just showed a back to back to back segment on that very topic.

      I have got to get back stateside!! Peace

    • AO

      @Intellectual Hedonist, I was going to throw that out too; of course the only reason I’m up on this little tidbit of information, wait for it, a brutha is seriously trapped in Germany and CNN International just showed a back to back to back segment on that very topic.

      I have got to get back stateside!! Peace

    • @Intellectual Hedonist, duly noted (and finna be corrected).

      you know, i actually know that. in fact, the reason i was born in panama is b/c my parents were sent to Guyana to aid in the cleanup efforts. at around the time of the massacre, mama panama would have been about 2 months pregnant…which means she probably didn’t know…lol.

      anyway, thanks for the correction…

      and viva la kool-aid.

    • @Intellectual Hedonist, duly noted (and finna be corrected).

      you know, i actually know that. in fact, the reason i was born in panama is b/c my parents were sent to Guyana to aid in the cleanup efforts. at around the time of the massacre, mama panama would have been about 2 months pregnant…which means she probably didn’t know…lol.

      anyway, thanks for the correction…

      and viva la kool-aid.

  • Panama I realize you love yourself and your sexxxy but Jim Jones used Kool Aid to kill himslef and a whole lot of folks in Guyana not Panama

  • I wrote a series of posts about things grown men and women need not wear a bit ago on my Blog

    These include:

    *Mullets
    *Grills
    *Crocs
    *Loud Logos
    *Partner Tattoos
    *Side Ponytails
    *Finger waves

    Talking about these made me tired

    • PBG

      @Luvvie,

      I wear a side ponytail, Luvvie. Swept low and to the side. It’s rather fly, if I do say so myself.

      And…I do say so.

      • @PBG,

        I agree… done properly, the side pony tail can be cute. Low, side swept (and in the summer with a pretty flower) can be quite beguiling..

        • PBG

          @blackberry molasses,

          BBMo, you e-know me so well. I have a bunch of flowers I use for my side ponytails in summer. I just started last summer when I finally got enough length for the style.

          • @PBG,

            ive rocked the side pony…which just turns out to be a side puff. but more often i will rock the side bun and its hotness!

          • @PBG,

            ive rocked the side pony…which just turns out to be a side puff. but more often i will rock the side bun and its hotness!

          • Peyso

            @PBG, I can tell you’re a respectable black women, you waited for the length to come in first.

            • @Peyso,
              I agree Peyso (hey what happened to the new name??)

              I respect you so much more for that PBG.

              • PBG

                @Monk,

                With both Monk’s and Peyso’s endorsement, along w/IVR’s stamp of “awesome” yesterday…I think I may officially be cool.

                *beams* :)

              • PBG

                @Monk,

                With both Monk’s and Peyso’s endorsement, along w/IVR’s stamp of “awesome” yesterday…I think I may officially be cool.

                *beams* :)

            • @Peyso,
              I agree Peyso (hey what happened to the new name??)

              I respect you so much more for that PBG.

            • IVR

              @Peyso, “I can tell you’re a respectable black women, you waited for the length to come in first.”

              This reminds me of those little girls whose moms would pull their hair back so tight that they just looked surprised all the time to fit a little tuft of hair in a barrette* (sp?) . . . ahh . . .the good ole Brooklyn days.

              • @IVR,

                the phrase “little tuft of air” just bout made my morn. I thank thee

              • @IVR,

                the phrase “little tuft of air” just bout made my morn. I thank thee

              • IVR

                @Luvvie, “the phrase “little tuft of air” just bout made my morn. I thank thee”

                No problem!

              • IVR

                @Luvvie, “the phrase “little tuft of air” just bout made my morn. I thank thee”

                No problem!

            • IVR

              @Peyso, “I can tell you’re a respectable black women, you waited for the length to come in first.”

              This reminds me of those little girls whose moms would pull their hair back so tight that they just looked surprised all the time to fit a little tuft of hair in a barrette* (sp?) . . . ahh . . .the good ole Brooklyn days.

          • Peyso

            @PBG, I can tell you’re a respectable black women, you waited for the length to come in first.

        • PBG

          @blackberry molasses,

          BBMo, you e-know me so well. I have a bunch of flowers I use for my side ponytails in summer. I just started last summer when I finally got enough length for the style.

      • @PBG,

        I agree… done properly, the side pony tail can be cute. Low, side swept (and in the summer with a pretty flower) can be quite beguiling..

      • @PBG,

        The side ponytails I’m thinkin bouts are the ones that are high on the head. I appreciate a side-swept chignon. But the brush that sits on the side of the crown is NOT whats smoking in the parkway.

        • @Luvvie,

          *oh mickey youre so fine, youre so fine you blow my mind, hey mickey!*

          • @shatani,

            A rapper hasn’t remade this yet?? Just asking…

          • @shatani,

            A rapper hasn’t remade this yet?? Just asking…

        • @Luvvie,

          *oh mickey youre so fine, youre so fine you blow my mind, hey mickey!*

        • overit

          @Luvvie,

          I now feel compelled to send you a pic of me in a side ponytail. I think I shall.

          • 8th Wonder

            I need to see this as well, thanks.

          • 8th Wonder

            I need to see this as well, thanks.

          • @overit,

            I insist you send me this pic. But IF i roast it, know that I still heart you

          • @overit,

            I insist you send me this pic. But IF i roast it, know that I still heart you

          • @overit,

            why dont you just post it on your facebook so we can all partake!

          • @overit,

            why dont you just post it on your facebook so we can all partake!

        • overit

          @Luvvie,

          I now feel compelled to send you a pic of me in a side ponytail. I think I shall.

      • @PBG,

        The side ponytails I’m thinkin bouts are the ones that are high on the head. I appreciate a side-swept chignon. But the brush that sits on the side of the crown is NOT whats smoking in the parkway.

      • @PBG, lol me too PBG or rather I used to rock my side afro puff.. it was supa dupa fly.. but now I am locking..I miss my puff….

        • PBG

          @Shay-d-lady,

          You’re locking? Alright now! Welcome to The Family. :)

        • PBG

          @Shay-d-lady,

          You’re locking? Alright now! Welcome to The Family. :)

        • @Shay-d-lady,

          Yay for locking!! Whoo Hoo!!!

        • @Shay-d-lady,

          Yay for locking!! Whoo Hoo!!!

        • @Shay-d-lady,

          I was locked and cut them off bc I missed the afro puff…. but happy locking, it was fun!

        • @Shay-d-lady,

          I was locked and cut them off bc I missed the afro puff…. but happy locking, it was fun!

        • @Shay-d-lady,

          ooooh, you are, shay-d?!?! im gonna lock soon too! i love my fro, but its too long now for me to want to deal with it.

        • @Shay-d-lady,

          ooooh, you are, shay-d?!?! im gonna lock soon too! i love my fro, but its too long now for me to want to deal with it.

      • @PBG, lol me too PBG or rather I used to rock my side afro puff.. it was supa dupa fly.. but now I am locking..I miss my puff….

    • PBG

      @Luvvie,

      I wear a side ponytail, Luvvie. Swept low and to the side. It’s rather fly, if I do say so myself.

      And…I do say so.

    • @Luvvie,

      http://www.mulletsgalore.com/

      because I wish to offend today… LMAO

      • @blackberry molasses,
        the mullet is awesome
        I think I shall invent the negro-mullet

        • @Deviant,

          the negro mullet has been here, on black women stuck in a Salt n Pepa phase. Business in the front party in the back, I hate that hairdo wit a passion.

          • @Relax, Relate, Alise,
            but there is no male version

            • PBG

              @Deviant,

              And there shouldn’t be. No, not ever.

              • @PBG,

                sad to say, yes there is…

                *cough* lionel ritchie *cough*

              • @PBG,

                sad to say, yes there is…

                *cough* lionel ritchie *cough*

            • PBG

              @Deviant,

              And there shouldn’t be. No, not ever.

            • IVR

              @Deviant, “but there is no male version”

              What about the mohawk p-diddy looking thing people are running around with . . . that’s gotta be close.

              • SouthernGirl

                @IVR, hell no! i hate that sh1t

              • SouthernGirl

                @IVR, hell no! i hate that sh1t

              • @IVR,
                thats not a mullet thats jus b.s.
                anything that begins with “diddy does..” or ends with “like diddy does” is soemthing that should not be done

                when I think mullet I think of the hair guys in the old NWA wore. Those are mullets. Old Ric Flair and Magnum T.A. hairstyles.

              • @IVR,
                thats not a mullet thats jus b.s.
                anything that begins with “diddy does..” or ends with “like diddy does” is soemthing that should not be done

                when I think mullet I think of the hair guys in the old NWA wore. Those are mullets. Old Ric Flair and Magnum T.A. hairstyles.

              • @Deviant

                i think “diddy does” is gonna be added to my repertoire…

              • @Deviant

                i think “diddy does” is gonna be added to my repertoire…

            • IVR

              @Deviant, “but there is no male version”

              What about the mohawk p-diddy looking thing people are running around with . . . that’s gotta be close.

            • @Deviant,

              If you invent the male negro mullet, I shall curse your first born to have the sense of style of Cam’ron. He gon LOVE pink fur.

              So umm, don’t do it. I will seek revenge

              • @Luvvie,

                *cough* A.C. Slater *cough*

                (saved by the bell, for those who dont know)

              • @Luvvie,

                *cough* A.C. Slater *cough*

                (saved by the bell, for those who dont know)

            • @Deviant,

              If you invent the male negro mullet, I shall curse your first born to have the sense of style of Cam’ron. He gon LOVE pink fur.

              So umm, don’t do it. I will seek revenge

            • @Deviant, the shag is close enough…..

            • @Deviant, the shag is close enough…..

            • RedBeanzNRice

              @Deviant,

              Two words:
              Jermaine Jackson.

              • 8th Wonder

                “Jermaine Jackson is so greasy, the cops can’t catch him!”

                -Chris Rock

              • 8th Wonder

                “Jermaine Jackson is so greasy, the cops can’t catch him!”

                -Chris Rock

              • @Ocho Pan

                Follow the drip follow the drip

              • @Ocho Pan

                Follow the drip follow the drip

            • RedBeanzNRice

              @Deviant,

              Two words:
              Jermaine Jackson.

          • @Relax, Relate, Alise,
            but there is no male version

          • IVR

            @Relax, Relate, Alise, “the negro mullet has been here, on black women stuck in a Salt n Pepa phase. Business in the front party in the back, I hate that hairdo wit a passion.”

            My old supervisor had this black woman mullet (my caucasian brother in arms had to explain to me what a mullet was), I always thought it was exciting when it bopped up and down on top. . . waiting for it to fall over but it never did . . . and when she got it tuned up. . . u couldn’t tell her NOTHIN!

            • @IVR,

              im so mad at the usage of the term “tune up” for mullet maintenance! lmao

            • @IVR,

              im so mad at the usage of the term “tune up” for mullet maintenance! lmao

          • IVR

            @Relax, Relate, Alise, “the negro mullet has been here, on black women stuck in a Salt n Pepa phase. Business in the front party in the back, I hate that hairdo wit a passion.”

            My old supervisor had this black woman mullet (my caucasian brother in arms had to explain to me what a mullet was), I always thought it was exciting when it bopped up and down on top. . . waiting for it to fall over but it never did . . . and when she got it tuned up. . . u couldn’t tell her NOTHIN!

        • @Deviant,

          the negro mullet has been here, on black women stuck in a Salt n Pepa phase. Business in the front party in the back, I hate that hairdo wit a passion.

      • @blackberry molasses,
        the mullet is awesome
        I think I shall invent the negro-mullet

    • @Luvvie,

      http://www.mulletsgalore.com/

      because I wish to offend today… LMAO

    • em

      @Luvvie, hold up, just hold the eff up!!! Side ponytails, made a come back? Oh lawd…

    • em

      @Luvvie, hold up, just hold the eff up!!! Side ponytails, made a come back? Oh lawd…

    • @Luvvie, I see women rocking finger waves in Raleigh/Durham all of the time like it’s the ’90s. I just want to snatch them, and wash out that crunchy ish.

      • @N.I.A. isonebadmutha….,

        you live in the triangle? me too, another NC vsber, hooray!

      • @N.I.A. isonebadmutha….,

        you live in the triangle? me too, another NC vsber, hooray!

      • @N.I.A. isonebadmutha….,

        I usually read and don’t comment. (hence a lurker)
        But I just had to…
        I’m in the Triangle area and they gotta be out of gel – I’m seeing way too many fingerwaves on a DAILY basis!

        • @ZDubb,

          don’t know where the official welcome committee is but

          WELCOME

          **sprinkles Diva Dust ™**

        • @ZDubb,

          don’t know where the official welcome committee is but

          WELCOME

          **sprinkles Diva Dust ™**

        • SouthernGirl

          @ZDubb, welcome and sh!t *gold stars*

        • SouthernGirl

          @ZDubb, welcome and sh!t *gold stars*

        • PBG

          @ZDubb,

          Welcome ZDubb…

          I’ll add your screen name to the roster in the Prayer Cubicle.

          And somewhere right now, some mad scientist is working on yet another batch of horrid brown gel, so no hunnybunny…they will never run out. *sadness*

        • PBG

          @ZDubb,

          Welcome ZDubb…

          I’ll add your screen name to the roster in the Prayer Cubicle.

          And somewhere right now, some mad scientist is working on yet another batch of horrid brown gel, so no hunnybunny…they will never run out. *sadness*

        • @ZDubb,

          Sorry that the Welcome committee is late. I had to go stand on line for some rice. You know, the important things.

          Anyway, welcome to our crooked palace of VerySmartpeople. Here at the land of the smarts, we aim to please (no one), and aim to roast (everyone).

          We got 3 corners. The IG Corner, the Prayer Cubicle, and the Sat Down Corner. Some of us have been sent to all 3 at one point in time. Me, I mainly monitor the IG corner, making sure riff raffs (aka people with sense) dont find their way in.

          With that being said, enjoy, kick back. Keep ur shoes (we don’t like the smell of feets).

        • @ZDubb,

          Sorry that the Welcome committee is late. I had to go stand on line for some rice. You know, the important things.

          Anyway, welcome to our crooked palace of VerySmartpeople. Here at the land of the smarts, we aim to please (no one), and aim to roast (everyone).

          We got 3 corners. The IG Corner, the Prayer Cubicle, and the Sat Down Corner. Some of us have been sent to all 3 at one point in time. Me, I mainly monitor the IG corner, making sure riff raffs (aka people with sense) dont find their way in.

          With that being said, enjoy, kick back. Keep ur shoes (we don’t like the smell of feets).

        • @ZDubb,

          welcome and sh*t

        • @ZDubb,

          welcome and sh*t

      • @N.I.A. isonebadmutha….,

        I usually read and don’t comment. (hence a lurker)
        But I just had to…
        I’m in the Triangle area and they gotta be out of gel – I’m seeing way too many fingerwaves on a DAILY basis!

      • kalia

        @N.I.A. isonebadmutha…., lol, any style that has to be “washed out” had to have expired in the 90’s

      • kalia

        @N.I.A. isonebadmutha…., lol, any style that has to be “washed out” had to have expired in the 90’s

      • Ro

        @N.I.A. isonebadmutha….,

        I promise the RDU/RTP area is like a mecca. My auntie is a hair dresser and I cringe everytime I hear someone ask for fingerwaves or demand that she use the brown gel!

        *cringing at the thought right now*

      • Ro

        @N.I.A. isonebadmutha….,

        I promise the RDU/RTP area is like a mecca. My auntie is a hair dresser and I cringe everytime I hear someone ask for fingerwaves or demand that she use the brown gel!

        *cringing at the thought right now*

    • @Luvvie, I see women rocking finger waves in Raleigh/Durham all of the time like it’s the ’90s. I just want to snatch them, and wash out that crunchy ish.

    • @Luvvie, Awww shat…and just when my girl and I thought we were going the bring the finger waves back Keshia Cole style.

      • @Teacia, finger waves? are bad.

        thank you.

        • @Panama Jackson,

          what about baby hair?

          • SouthernGirl

            @shatani, don’t start. lol

            • @SouthernGirl,

              *goes to sat down*

            • @SouthernGirl,

              *goes to sat down*

          • SouthernGirl

            @shatani, don’t start. lol

        • @Panama Jackson,

          what about baby hair?

      • @Teacia, finger waves? are bad.

        thank you.

    • @Luvvie, Awww shat…and just when my girl and I thought we were going the bring the finger waves back Keshia Cole style.

    • Voiceofreason

      @Luvvie,

      Low side ponytails are cool if and only if you have enough hair to pull of the look. If not, all you’ve got is a crooked snatchback.

    • Voiceofreason

      @Luvvie,

      Low side ponytails are cool if and only if you have enough hair to pull of the look. If not, all you’ve got is a crooked snatchback.

    • @Luvvie,

      ***awarding daily “shameless self pluggery” trophy to the luv bug***

      • @The Champ,

        Thank you for this award Champ. Does it come with a widget? I would thank my mama but I think this is one speech she’d like to sit out on.

        • @Luvvie,

          i dont think you can handle one of my widgets

          • @The Champ,

            “i dont think you can handle one of my widgets”

            Ur widgets have BEEN handled by me. How soon we forget, Champ, lol

          • @The Champ,

            “i dont think you can handle one of my widgets”

            Ur widgets have BEEN handled by me. How soon we forget, Champ, lol

        • @Luvvie,

          i dont think you can handle one of my widgets

      • @The Champ,

        Thank you for this award Champ. Does it come with a widget? I would thank my mama but I think this is one speech she’d like to sit out on.

    • @Luvvie,

      ***awarding daily “shameless self pluggery” trophy to the luv bug***

  • I wrote a series of posts about things grown men and women need not wear a bit ago on my Blog

    These include:

    *Mullets
    *Grills
    *Crocs
    *Loud Logos
    *Partner Tattoos
    *Side Ponytails
    *Finger waves

    Talking about these made me tired

  • PBG

    Old Navy has different rises, thank goodness.

    But their sizes are janky as h3ll. I can fit a size 8 (loosely), but a size 10 is too tight? What gives, haters?

    • @PBG,

      the fact that you can get the black woman posterior into a pair of Old Navy jeans is commendable. I generally end up with the whole butt cleavage/need a belt thing going on… Only one pair I ever bought from them accomodated the booty.

      • PBG

        @blackberry molasses,

        I found one pair that fit and bought the same dayum jeans in every wash they had. My booty…aye! Combined w/my height, it’s always an issue.

      • PBG

        @blackberry molasses,

        I found one pair that fit and bought the same dayum jeans in every wash they had. My booty…aye! Combined w/my height, it’s always an issue.

      • @blackberry molasses,

        ive never bought jeans at old navy…and the different rises must be new cuz for the longest EVERYthing was low rise and that just wont work for me.

        plus im mad at old navy anyway cuz you can only get plus sizes online. eff that! they got maternity in the store but cant have plus size? azzholes.

        • PBG

          @shatani,

          “plus im mad at old navy anyway cuz you can only get plus sizes online.”

          Yeah, they are wrong for that.

          I’m not sure how long they’ve had the various rises, but I appreciate that and the various lengths as well. I can’t do the low rise OR the average/tall lengths.

          • @PBG, No, they have plus sizes and extra small sizes in the store, both of which I cannot wear, I fall in the scmedium, which do not normally fit my buttocks properly, but every now and then i find an irregular gem., i am gonna shut my drunk posting azz up….

            • @Relax, Relate, Alise,

              um…in what store? they stopped carrying plus sizes in the stores a long time ago….they carry the XS and they carry maternity in the stores now. if youre big but not pregnant, you betta get thee to the innanet.

            • @Relax, Relate, Alise,

              um…in what store? they stopped carrying plus sizes in the stores a long time ago….they carry the XS and they carry maternity in the stores now. if youre big but not pregnant, you betta get thee to the innanet.

          • @PBG, No, they have plus sizes and extra small sizes in the store, both of which I cannot wear, I fall in the scmedium, which do not normally fit my buttocks properly, but every now and then i find an irregular gem., i am gonna shut my drunk posting azz up….

          • miss t-lee

            @PBG,
            Old Navy’s plus sizes are ill fitting anyway. That ish is like a juniors plus or something…
            terrible.

          • miss t-lee

            @PBG,
            Old Navy’s plus sizes are ill fitting anyway. That ish is like a juniors plus or something…
            terrible.

        • PBG

          @shatani,

          “plus im mad at old navy anyway cuz you can only get plus sizes online.”

          Yeah, they are wrong for that.

          I’m not sure how long they’ve had the various rises, but I appreciate that and the various lengths as well. I can’t do the low rise OR the average/tall lengths.

        • overit

          @shatani, Old Navy pants are the worst anyway. Unless its pajamas.

          • miss t-lee

            @overit,
            I agree.

          • miss t-lee

            @overit,
            I agree.

          • @overit,

            i only ever buy skirts and dresses from them. i got a fabulous halter dress for like $10.

          • @overit,

            i only ever buy skirts and dresses from them. i got a fabulous halter dress for like $10.

        • overit

          @shatani, Old Navy pants are the worst anyway. Unless its pajamas.

      • @blackberry molasses,

        ive never bought jeans at old navy…and the different rises must be new cuz for the longest EVERYthing was low rise and that just wont work for me.

        plus im mad at old navy anyway cuz you can only get plus sizes online. eff that! they got maternity in the store but cant have plus size? azzholes.

      • SouthernGirl

        @blackberry molasses, i stopped attempting to buy jeans from old navy years ago. i’m pretty petite but i still get the whole thing in the back too cause me and becky don’t have the same @ss.

        had this problem with one style of victoria’s secret sweats. the white chick that was helping me was all, it looks good, that’s the way they’re supposed to be and i’m looking at her crazy so she’s calls over another chick who was black and she confirmed that i was not tripping. she just looked at me like, girl those were not made for us and promptly took me to a pair that would fit.

      • SouthernGirl

        @blackberry molasses, i stopped attempting to buy jeans from old navy years ago. i’m pretty petite but i still get the whole thing in the back too cause me and becky don’t have the same @ss.

        had this problem with one style of victoria’s secret sweats. the white chick that was helping me was all, it looks good, that’s the way they’re supposed to be and i’m looking at her crazy so she’s calls over another chick who was black and she confirmed that i was not tripping. she just looked at me like, girl those were not made for us and promptly took me to a pair that would fit.

    • @PBG,

      the fact that you can get the black woman posterior into a pair of Old Navy jeans is commendable. I generally end up with the whole butt cleavage/need a belt thing going on… Only one pair I ever bought from them accomodated the booty.

    • @PBG,

      Old Navy pants are wonkier than… You know what, I’mo leave Forrest alone. I like him

      • puff

        @Luvvie,

        ahahahahahahhahaa you wrong for that. poor forrest. it ain’t his fault you gotta tilt your head to properly look at him straight on.

        sidenote on the jeans: i appreciate levi’s new hi rise jeans. while i do not have a muffin top, there’s something extra swexy and non-ninth grade about wearing jeans that fit correctly without exposing le crack, and that you can tuck a pretty blouse into.

        • @puff, baby them levis is the bomb.. you gotta go to the web site but those levis 515 in the dark rinse? shyt you cant tell me nothin in them joints….LOL stallionares….LMAO I have moved on from muthaf!@cka Im ill and have been ending my sentences with that… I love rank dayum foolishness, I swear I do

          • PBG

            @Shay-d-lady,

            Oh, how I love Levi’s. They do me right every time. I need to get a few more pairs in my life, since jeans are pretty much my daily uniform.

          • PBG

            @Shay-d-lady,

            Oh, how I love Levi’s. They do me right every time. I need to get a few more pairs in my life, since jeans are pretty much my daily uniform.

        • @puff, baby them levis is the bomb.. you gotta go to the web site but those levis 515 in the dark rinse? shyt you cant tell me nothin in them joints….LOL stallionares….LMAO I have moved on from muthaf!@cka Im ill and have been ending my sentences with that… I love rank dayum foolishness, I swear I do

        • @puff, like I tell my 7 year old (non hip having pants always sliding down) neice

          crack kills!

        • @puff, like I tell my 7 year old (non hip having pants always sliding down) neice

          crack kills!

      • puff

        @Luvvie,

        ahahahahahahhahaa you wrong for that. poor forrest. it ain’t his fault you gotta tilt your head to properly look at him straight on.

        sidenote on the jeans: i appreciate levi’s new hi rise jeans. while i do not have a muffin top, there’s something extra swexy and non-ninth grade about wearing jeans that fit correctly without exposing le crack, and that you can tuck a pretty blouse into.

    • @PBG,

      Old Navy pants are wonkier than… You know what, I’mo leave Forrest alone. I like him

    • laylah

      @PBG,

      old navy jeans are effed up. i have some size fours that are loose and others that are tight and dig into my sides.

    • laylah

      @PBG,

      old navy jeans are effed up. i have some size fours that are loose and others that are tight and dig into my sides.

    • laylah

      @PBG,

      you guys should try miss sixty, best jeans ever. i swear, they look good on everyone and they last long.

      • PBG

        @laylah,

        What are their policies in relation to those of us under 5’5″?? This information is pertinent to my life situations.

        • SouthernGirl

          @PBG, i second this emotion

        • SouthernGirl

          @PBG, i second this emotion

        • @PBG,

          and what of those of us upwards of 5’7?? i dont wish to signal that a flood is a-comin…

        • @PBG,

          and what of those of us upwards of 5’7?? i dont wish to signal that a flood is a-comin…

      • PBG

        @laylah,

        What are their policies in relation to those of us under 5’5″?? This information is pertinent to my life situations.

      • RedBeanzNRice

        @laylah,

        “i swear, they look good on everyone and they last long.”

        Industrial strength jeans?

      • RedBeanzNRice

        @laylah,

        “i swear, they look good on everyone and they last long.”

        Industrial strength jeans?

      • @laylah,

        Yes, I need to know if Miss Sixty stans for us vertically challenged individuals.

        • laylah

          @Luvvie, and everyone else…

          i don’t know about the length because they are long on me and im 5’6. well, when you are ever in the market to buy some jeans to rock with heels… miss sixty is the way to go. and yes, industrial strength, they are. i’ve had these jeans since my sophomore year of college and they still don’t look worn out yet.

        • laylah

          @Luvvie, and everyone else…

          i don’t know about the length because they are long on me and im 5’6. well, when you are ever in the market to buy some jeans to rock with heels… miss sixty is the way to go. and yes, industrial strength, they are. i’ve had these jeans since my sophomore year of college and they still don’t look worn out yet.

      • @laylah,

        Yes, I need to know if Miss Sixty stans for us vertically challenged individuals.

    • laylah

      @PBG,

      you guys should try miss sixty, best jeans ever. i swear, they look good on everyone and they last long.

  • PBG

    Old Navy has different rises, thank goodness.

    But their sizes are janky as h3ll. I can fit a size 8 (loosely), but a size 10 is too tight? What gives, haters?

  • My sisters with 4 breasts you know who you are, the one trying to fit your H (cup size ) breast in a DDD cup, causing the 4 breast effect. Im sure over the Thanksgiving Holiday one of your relatives exhibited this faux pas.

    It scares small children and medium sized animals so please do us a favor take your arse to Nordstrom and get fitted properly for a bra an then actually buy one that fits properly, and WEAR IT! Stop stuffing yourself into one that is one too many cups too small, because unless you are from another planet or a quadraped there is no reason you should have four protruding breasts with disaligned cleavage.

    • PBG

      @Intellectual Hedonist,

      LOL…That’s called a “quadroboob”!

      • @PBG, its called unnecessary and ridonkulous! I mean for God’s sake I can look down at my breast and know I have no business in a D cup, can’t she feel the circulation to her mammary glands is geting cut off?

        • PBG

          @Intellectual Hedonist,

          Her circulation being cut off makes her dumb…brain goes on low power. She doesn’t realize she is looking a hot mess.

          At least, that’s my theory.

        • PBG

          @Intellectual Hedonist,

          Her circulation being cut off makes her dumb…brain goes on low power. She doesn’t realize she is looking a hot mess.

          At least, that’s my theory.

      • @PBG, its called unnecessary and ridonkulous! I mean for God’s sake I can look down at my breast and know I have no business in a D cup, can’t she feel the circulation to her mammary glands is geting cut off?

      • @PBG,

        i call it sandwich boob… looks like they got two diagonal cut sandwiches stuck on their chests… makes not a lick of sense

        *grumbles* ain’t gonna offend my eyes trying to create cleavage with an ill fitting undergarment

      • @PBG,

        i call it sandwich boob… looks like they got two diagonal cut sandwiches stuck on their chests… makes not a lick of sense

        *grumbles* ain’t gonna offend my eyes trying to create cleavage with an ill fitting undergarment

      • @PBG, na uh… my granny calls it cow titties…. cause you know they droopy too….

        • PBG

          @Shay-d-lady,

          I officially love your Granny for that. I’m sending hugs her way!

        • PBG

          @Shay-d-lady,

          I officially love your Granny for that. I’m sending hugs her way!

      • @PBG, na uh… my granny calls it cow titties…. cause you know they droopy too….

    • PBG

      @Intellectual Hedonist,

      LOL…That’s called a “quadroboob”!

    • @Intellectual Hedonist,
      i’m mad u said medium sized animals, that made my drunk night, thanks.

    • @Intellectual Hedonist,
      i’m mad u said medium sized animals, that made my drunk night, thanks.

    • 8th Wonder

      “It scares small children and medium sized animals….”

      I’m done with you.

    • 8th Wonder

      “It scares small children and medium sized animals….”

      I’m done with you.

    • SouthernGirl

      @Intellectual Hedonist, I used to work at victoria’s secret. you don’t know what i had to go through to get some chicks in the proper sized bra. the stories i could tell….

      • @SouthernGirl,

        i worked at lane bryant and it was the same damn mess! and i dont get why folks are so resistant to change when ish actually looks better!?!?!

      • @SouthernGirl,

        i worked at lane bryant and it was the same damn mess! and i dont get why folks are so resistant to change when ish actually looks better!?!?!

    • SouthernGirl

      @Intellectual Hedonist, I used to work at victoria’s secret. you don’t know what i had to go through to get some chicks in the proper sized bra. the stories i could tell….

    • SouthernGirl

      @Intellectual Hedonist, i used to work at victoria’s secret. you don’t know the struggle i went through daily to grt chicks in the right bra. *smh* the stories i could tell…

      • SouthernGirl

        @SouthernGirl, see, blame this double posting on technology…

      • SouthernGirl

        @SouthernGirl, see, blame this double posting on technology…

    • SouthernGirl

      @Intellectual Hedonist, i used to work at victoria’s secret. you don’t know the struggle i went through daily to grt chicks in the right bra. *smh* the stories i could tell…

    • laylah

      @Intellectual Hedonist,

      i agree. i have this friend who shares the same cup size as me. this heathen tries to fit her girls into a 34 C. she knows good and well shes a D, but she thinks she has cute cleavage. falling out of your bra isnt cute… you just look messy.

      • @laylah,

        I would say sumthin but VEG may kill me. *whistles out*

      • @laylah,

        I would say sumthin but VEG may kill me. *whistles out*

    • laylah

      @Intellectual Hedonist,

      i agree. i have this friend who shares the same cup size as me. this heathen tries to fit her girls into a 34 C. she knows good and well shes a D, but she thinks she has cute cleavage. falling out of your bra isnt cute… you just look messy.

  • My sisters with 4 breasts you know who you are, the one trying to fit your H (cup size ) breast in a DDD cup, causing the 4 breast effect. Im sure over the Thanksgiving Holiday one of your relatives exhibited this faux pas.

    It scares small children and medium sized animals so please do us a favor take your arse to Nordstrom and get fitted properly for a bra an then actually buy one that fits properly, and WEAR IT! Stop stuffing yourself into one that is one too many cups too small, because unless you are from another planet or a quadraped there is no reason you should have four protruding breasts with disaligned cleavage.

  • I live in NJ, the home of some of the worst fashion offenders in the world…

    The Guido Look– greased back hair, extra-shmedium shirts, tight pants and motorcyle boots while driving a t-top trans-am or an Iroc-Z

    The Skank-Whore Look- 2 sizes too small tank top, no bra (with saggy boobs) and of course, the muffin top creating 2 sizes too small low rise jeans

    Those ‘potato sack’ banded bottom dresses–for being so damn difficult wear in a flattering manner, they sure are ubiquitous.

    Jeans tucked into your timbs (females especially, but males too)— WTF?!?!

    extra-loud logos/logos plastered all over your stuff… you are a walking advertisement for x-brand and they ain’t even paying you. you clearly don’t respect the gangsta

    Obviously fake designer stuff– JUST STOP IT.

    Rainbow colored weaves– walking around looking like a bag of skittles and a box of crayola had chex on your head

    Toupee looking weaves/wigs– you offend me, madam… sometimes sir

    I’ll stop because I’m starting to feel ill, thinking about these

    • PBG

      @blackberry molasses,

      I absolutely HATE logos. They are just the worst. People tend to put too much stock in a brand name…and not own any real stock. Dumb a$$es.

      • charli skipper

        @PBG, this might be a mild bit haterish, but it annoys me when ugly people brag about brand names. you’re not cute in jordache. so you’re gonna be ugly in prada. save your money, honey.

        • @charli skipper, smh @ jordache

          I used to own a pair in middle school

          • charli skipper

            @Intellectual Hedonist, ain’t nothin wrong wit some Jordache! lol

            • @charli skipper, I didn’t say there were. all I said was that I wore them in middle school, just like I wore leg warmers in middle school, more than 20 years ago. That is all I’m saying about that

              • PBG

                @Intellectual Hedonist,

                When my Mother got me leg warmers w/a matching sweater one year for Christmas back in my junior high school days, I thought I was the bee’s knees for sure! LOL! Wooow!

              • PBG

                @Intellectual Hedonist,

                When my Mother got me leg warmers w/a matching sweater one year for Christmas back in my junior high school days, I thought I was the bee’s knees for sure! LOL! Wooow!

              • Intellectual Hedonist

                @Intellectual Hedonist, you know leg warmers were the ish, I aint even mad they are making a comeback, but you wont see them on my legs.

                This goes in line with knowing your limitations, at a certain age, certain fashions aint for you. you aint looking young and trendy you looking dumb and stoopit!

                So while I will buy some legwarmers for the kids I had my legwarmer days. Besides my legs are too hot to be covered up

              • Intellectual Hedonist

                @Intellectual Hedonist, you know leg warmers were the ish, I aint even mad they are making a comeback, but you wont see them on my legs.

                This goes in line with knowing your limitations, at a certain age, certain fashions aint for you. you aint looking young and trendy you looking dumb and stoopit!

                So while I will buy some legwarmers for the kids I had my legwarmer days. Besides my legs are too hot to be covered up

            • @charli skipper, I didn’t say there were. all I said was that I wore them in middle school, just like I wore leg warmers in middle school, more than 20 years ago. That is all I’m saying about that

          • charli skipper

            @Intellectual Hedonist, ain’t nothin wrong wit some Jordache! lol

        • @charli skipper, smh @ jordache

          I used to own a pair in middle school

        • @charli skipper,

          “it annoys me when ugly people brag about brand names. you’re not cute in jordache. so you’re gonna be ugly in prada. save your money, honey.”

          LOL!

          • @The Champ,

            i second that emotion.

          • @The Champ,

            i second that emotion.

        • @charli skipper,

          “it annoys me when ugly people brag about brand names. you’re not cute in jordache. so you’re gonna be ugly in prada. save your money, honey.”

          LOL!

      • charli skipper

        @PBG, this might be a mild bit haterish, but it annoys me when ugly people brag about brand names. you’re not cute in jordache. so you’re gonna be ugly in prada. save your money, honey.

    • PBG

      @blackberry molasses,

      I absolutely HATE logos. They are just the worst. People tend to put too much stock in a brand name…and not own any real stock. Dumb a$$es.

    • @blackberry molasses,

      African men are GOOD for extra loud logos. Their need to display that they are wearing a name brand is ridiculous. I always have the same reaction.

      1. I see you’ve visited Canal Street lately
      2. Good for you. Go Sat down! No one cares.

    • @blackberry molasses,

      African men are GOOD for extra loud logos. Their need to display that they are wearing a name brand is ridiculous. I always have the same reaction.

      1. I see you’ve visited Canal Street lately
      2. Good for you. Go Sat down! No one cares.

    • @blackberry molasses,

      these chicks in philly sadden me….i mean EVERYthing is at least 2 sizes too small. even the thinnest chick looks fat and dumpy cuz her low rise jeans are FAR too small and she can barely move her legs, meanwhile her top was meant for a child sized doll….it just does not make sense.

      and i also have to lodge a complaint against the friggin bubble dress…those things are horrendous! they dont look good on anyone ever…EVER! im tired of shapely women wearing shapeless clothing….it aint for us. its for women shaped like pre-pubescent boys and even they dont look good in it.

      • @shatani, “cuz her low rise jeans are FAR too small and she can barely move her legs”

        I. am. done!

        • @Nicki Sunshine,

          im for real! they be waddling across the street all slow, takin babysteps and junk…then the light change and they wanna roll eyes when folks start beeping horns!

          its really ridiculous…if youre a size 10, why try and squeeze into a size 6? so you can say you wear a 6? chile please, you tell somebody youre a 6 and they think, “well, hardly!” *smdh*

          • @shatani, LMAO. That is disgusting. I love my lil sister but her and her friends are guilty of it. I’m 28 and these heffas look more grown woman than me (and not in a good way!)…. Yesterday, she had on this tight polo style shirt and I just kept poking at her stomach.

            • @Nicki Sunshine,

              oh, cuz THATS not gonna give her a complex!! lmao…theres a better way to discourage that behavior, miss sunshine!

              • @shatani, LOL! Girl, she is 19! Soft love didn’t work. Trust, she’s not lacking in self esteem at all, her and those chubby little girlfriends of hers.

              • @shatani, LOL! Girl, she is 19! Soft love didn’t work. Trust, she’s not lacking in self esteem at all, her and those chubby little girlfriends of hers.

              • @shatani,

                lmao!! im mad at you describing her crew like they wish to welcome you to munchkin land!

              • @shatani,

                lmao!! im mad at you describing her crew like they wish to welcome you to munchkin land!

            • @Nicki Sunshine,

              oh, cuz THATS not gonna give her a complex!! lmao…theres a better way to discourage that behavior, miss sunshine!

          • @shatani, LMAO. That is disgusting. I love my lil sister but her and her friends are guilty of it. I’m 28 and these heffas look more grown woman than me (and not in a good way!)…. Yesterday, she had on this tight polo style shirt and I just kept poking at her stomach.

        • @Nicki Sunshine,

          im for real! they be waddling across the street all slow, takin babysteps and junk…then the light change and they wanna roll eyes when folks start beeping horns!

          its really ridiculous…if youre a size 10, why try and squeeze into a size 6? so you can say you wear a 6? chile please, you tell somebody youre a 6 and they think, “well, hardly!” *smdh*

      • @shatani, “cuz her low rise jeans are FAR too small and she can barely move her legs”

        I. am. done!

    • @blackberry molasses,

      these chicks in philly sadden me….i mean EVERYthing is at least 2 sizes too small. even the thinnest chick looks fat and dumpy cuz her low rise jeans are FAR too small and she can barely move her legs, meanwhile her top was meant for a child sized doll….it just does not make sense.

      and i also have to lodge a complaint against the friggin bubble dress…those things are horrendous! they dont look good on anyone ever…EVER! im tired of shapely women wearing shapeless clothing….it aint for us. its for women shaped like pre-pubescent boys and even they dont look good in it.

    • @blackberry molasses, can I co sign on the obviously fake knock offs.. I mean really you can afford a prada bag and you work at the gas station.. and since when did gucci make sweat suits and matching socks? I mean for real? or the god awful trend that was fake burberry plaid….THE HORRORS….

      • puff

        @Shay-d-lady,

        no! not matching socks!

        • @puff,

          i would rock some gucci socks! lmao

        • @puff,

          i would rock some gucci socks! lmao

      • puff

        @Shay-d-lady,

        no! not matching socks!

      • sisanda

        @Shay-d-lady, hahahaahahahaha

        That shite isn’t right or bright!!

      • sisanda

        @Shay-d-lady, hahahaahahahaha

        That shite isn’t right or bright!!

      • Luvtheshoes

        @Shay-d-lady,

        One of my girlfriends has that gawd awful fake Burberry in a matching hat and belt set. I don’t have the heart to tell her she ain’t foolin nobody because she seems so darn proud of herself when she wears it. SMH

        • @Luvtheshoes,

          if you are truly her friend… TELL HER NOW!!!
          please… i beg you.

        • @Luvtheshoes,

          if you are truly her friend… TELL HER NOW!!!
          please… i beg you.

        • @Luvtheshoes,

          Friends dont let friends look a fool.

          Them the friends who I walk 4 feet in front of so folks dont think im wit em.

        • @Luvtheshoes,

          Friends dont let friends look a fool.

          Them the friends who I walk 4 feet in front of so folks dont think im wit em.

        • PBG

          @Luvtheshoes,

          You need to tell her…immediately. I promise you, Jesus and the rest of humanity wants you to do it.

          • Luvtheshoes

            @PBG,

            Yeah, I’d tell her but she’s the kind who would cut a bi!ch. I’m not trying to explain to my insurance that I need coverage over fake Burberry.

          • Luvtheshoes

            @PBG,

            Yeah, I’d tell her but she’s the kind who would cut a bi!ch. I’m not trying to explain to my insurance that I need coverage over fake Burberry.

        • PBG

          @Luvtheshoes,

          You need to tell her…immediately. I promise you, Jesus and the rest of humanity wants you to do it.

      • Luvtheshoes

        @Shay-d-lady,

        One of my girlfriends has that gawd awful fake Burberry in a matching hat and belt set. I don’t have the heart to tell her she ain’t foolin nobody because she seems so darn proud of herself when she wears it. SMH

    • @blackberry molasses, can I co sign on the obviously fake knock offs.. I mean really you can afford a prada bag and you work at the gas station.. and since when did gucci make sweat suits and matching socks? I mean for real? or the god awful trend that was fake burberry plaid….THE HORRORS….

    • RedBeanzNRice

      @blackberry molasses,

      “Jeans tucked into your timbs (females especially, but males too)— WTF?!?!”

      I agree. That should only be done on long mountain hikes and when diving into the ocean to save someone’s life.

      • @RedBeanzNRice,

        and if youre going on a bike ride…

      • @RedBeanzNRice,

        and if youre going on a bike ride…

    • RedBeanzNRice

      @blackberry molasses,

      “Jeans tucked into your timbs (females especially, but males too)— WTF?!?!”

      I agree. That should only be done on long mountain hikes and when diving into the ocean to save someone’s life.

    • @blackberry molasses,

      “I live in NJ, the home of some of the worst fashion offenders in the world…”

      based on your post…you are absolutely right. and i thought baltimore was bad.

      ninjas tuck in Tims??!?!?!?!?!? like do you mean make their pants look tapered and tuck them in…or stuff the jeans into the top and don’t tie the joints…?

      • PBG

        @Panama Jackson,

        Keep thinking Baltimore is bad…because it is. That’s the very first place I ever saw colored metallic spray on finger waves, circa 1991. Jesus, be a fence around that entire city.

        But yeah, Jersey sounds like they’re losin’ too.

        • Intellectual Hedonist

          @PBG, “Jesus, be a fence around that entire city”

          LOL!!! girl perhaps we should have a cleansing, let me go get my vela (large round glass encased candle) with the Virgin of Guadalupe on it

        • Intellectual Hedonist

          @PBG, “Jesus, be a fence around that entire city”

          LOL!!! girl perhaps we should have a cleansing, let me go get my vela (large round glass encased candle) with the Virgin of Guadalupe on it

      • PBG

        @Panama Jackson,

        Keep thinking Baltimore is bad…because it is. That’s the very first place I ever saw colored metallic spray on finger waves, circa 1991. Jesus, be a fence around that entire city.

        But yeah, Jersey sounds like they’re losin’ too.

      • @Panama Jackson,
        “ninjas tuck in Tims??!?!?!?!?!? like do you mean make their pants look tapered and tuck them in…or stuff the jeans into the top and don’t tie the joints…?”

        …..both…..

        Makes my eyes twitch every time I see that ish… not coincidentally, all of this spills over into the Illadelph where I work. They stay LOSIN’…

        • @blackberry molasses,

          delaware aint doin much better….the whole tri-state area is cursed….

        • @blackberry molasses,

          delaware aint doin much better….the whole tri-state area is cursed….

      • @Panama Jackson,
        “ninjas tuck in Tims??!?!?!?!?!? like do you mean make their pants look tapered and tuck them in…or stuff the jeans into the top and don’t tie the joints…?”

        …..both…..

        Makes my eyes twitch every time I see that ish… not coincidentally, all of this spills over into the Illadelph where I work. They stay LOSIN’…

    • @blackberry molasses,

      “I live in NJ, the home of some of the worst fashion offenders in the world…”

      based on your post…you are absolutely right. and i thought baltimore was bad.

      ninjas tuck in Tims??!?!?!?!?!? like do you mean make their pants look tapered and tuck them in…or stuff the jeans into the top and don’t tie the joints…?

  • I live in NJ, the home of some of the worst fashion offenders in the world…

    The Guido Look– greased back hair, extra-shmedium shirts, tight pants and motorcyle boots while driving a t-top trans-am or an Iroc-Z

    The Skank-Whore Look- 2 sizes too small tank top, no bra (with saggy boobs) and of course, the muffin top creating 2 sizes too small low rise jeans

    Those ‘potato sack’ banded bottom dresses–for being so damn difficult wear in a flattering manner, they sure are ubiquitous.

    Jeans tucked into your timbs (females especially, but males too)— WTF?!?!

    extra-loud logos/logos plastered all over your stuff… you are a walking advertisement for x-brand and they ain’t even paying you. you clearly don’t respect the gangsta

    Obviously fake designer stuff– JUST STOP IT.

    Rainbow colored weaves– walking around looking like a bag of skittles and a box of crayola had chex on your head

    Toupee looking weaves/wigs– you offend me, madam… sometimes sir

    I’ll stop because I’m starting to feel ill, thinking about these

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