And… breakups are stupid.

set a date with the soon to be ex. he/she will be happy. yaaaaay. make date with new prospect. explain to new prospect you have a stop to make on the way to your date with them and stop at date spot for you and ex. walk with new prospect to ex and introduce the ex as such and introduce the new prospect as such (ie: this is my weak ass busta ass ex george and this in my new virile stallion mike). bid your ex a good evening and stroll out of the restaurant with your new prospect. the ex will most definetely get the message.

*side effects include: cursing out by phone/voicemail, possible bad mouthing amongst mutual friends and a slight case of guilt. know that voicemails can be erased, your real friends won’t give a sh*t and guilt fades as peace of mind settles in. good luck and godspeed.

ctfu @ the great donkey!!!! you’s a fool!!!!

damn.

The great donkey?? 2520s and scions? LMAO. I sooo needed this comment in my life.

1. Don’t sleep with her again. No, not even head. She will take it as a sign that you want her to have your little cleverscreennames. This probably seems like common sense, but damn it’s sexy when a woman that you were already fond of for one reason or another can’t get her mouth from near your buckle or get enough of you. And bedtime activities are difficult for guys to turn down.

2. If you see her momma in the grocery store, don’t be nice/polite. This will lead to this discussion:
“Girl, you gotta fight for him. I always knew he was a good man. Don’t let no cleanup woman take what you got.” Now you’re trying to break up with two women and one of them has experience on her side. If, when you saw her momma in Vons or Winco or the Liquor store, you said “I’ve decided to worship the great donkey.” Then you wouldn’t have to worry about it. You’d be in the clear.

3. And this is most important. Don’t date a 2520 soon after your very insane sista. She will take it as a challenge. And she will win. And the poor 2520 might never see her Scion coming down the one way street in the wrong direction in the dead of night with the lights off.

One more thing, brothas and sistas alike. if you ever hear the phrase “I can’t live without you”, your immediate response should be “You’re right, I was a fool, please take me back.” At least until you work out a more concrete escape plan. Because whenever that phrase is uttered, what it really means is “You can’t live without me.” And it usually gets uttered right before the mysterious disappearances begin.

No more than 2 people who have seen me naked with legs up the sky on the FB at the same time. .

Okay I seriously laughed at this. And then I thought about and realized that you are on to something!!!

I did a brief scan and realized I myself apply that same rule! I didn’t even realize I did.

Oh and “The Man” unblocked this site, so I’s back snitches!!!

Damn, me thinks the VSS’s have decided on an effective – and subtle… :\ – way of getting rid of someone. All you have to do is give them minimum second degree burns and scar them for life.

I’m just mad at the consensus and giggles, though.