Madonna Sucks The Everlasting Living Human Spirit Soul Out Of Drake
During a Coachella performance of his song, “Madonna,” the actual Madonna joined Drake onstage for a special guest performance. But, wait there’s more. She ended the performance by forcing a kiss on young Aubrey, much to his chagrin. Seriously, homie looked like when our mama used to force-feed us Tussin whilst inflicted with the cold virus (and every other ailment ever, because Tussin fixes everything if you a Black mama). (Editor’s note: Or, better yet, how I imagine my dad looked when his mom used to make him eat Vicks VapoRub.)
Ouch. I bet Christina Aguilera is NOW glad everyone forgot Madonna also kissed her after Britney Spears.
Due to Drake’s reaction, I can’t help but wonder what a kiss from Madonna must (unfortunately) taste like. Gluten-free Rolaids? A Martian accent? A chicken sandwich (And not a piece of breaded chicken, but an actual live chicken between two slices of bread)?