I miss Zhane.
I’m not even sure how to approach this story that I came across on CNN.com the other day.
In fact, I think the only want to do it is to put up some paragraphs from this story:
Breaking up over e-mail is a social no-no.
But sending an e-card telling someone to get tested for STDs may be a public health courtesy.
A California-based nonprofit allows users to send free e-cards notifying their sexual partners to get tested for STDs.
Um..say heffa say what??
Since 2004, a free Web site, inSpot.org has allowed users to anonymously notify their partners to get tested for STDs such as HIV, gonorrhea, chlamydia and syphilis.
It may not be the most personal way of delivering the news, but researchers say it beats not saying anything at all.
“When you weigh the importance of getting people notified, that’s ultimately what needs to be done,” said Jeffrey D. Klausner, director of STD Prevention and Control Services in San Francisco, California’s Department of Public Health. “By notifying them — even if it’s done anonymously, even distantly, even with an e-card — the benefits of getting someone diagnosed and treated outweigh the concerns of insensitivity.”
The electronic cards deliver the news in a variety of styles. Some are flirty: “You’re too hot to be out of action. I got diagnosed with an STD since we played. You might want to get checked too.”
Some are somber: “Who? What? When? Where? It doesn’t matter. I got an STD; you might have it too. Please get checked out.”
Oh no she didn’t! Oh no she didn’t!
I don’t know about you all but I can’t IMAGINE getting an e-card that suggests I get tested for an STD from somebody. Granted, if they come down with something then its great that they let me know that perhaps I should find out for myself…but these cards kind of lend a light heart to what could be a burning problem.
Truly, it is important that people get tested. But if I got this e-card:
You’re hot! But you may be hotter after what I just found out. I have an STD and its lighting me up. You should go get checked since we fooled around the other night and got real free with one another!
Or perhaps this one:
You’re so great I want to applaud you. Unfortunately, I may also have given you just a single clap. STD’s aren’t a joke, go get tested!
Or worse yet, how about the direct approach:
I’ve got syphilis now. What about you? You should go find out!
I just might be ready to lick off a shot or two!
My people, my people, what in the hell would you do if you got an e-card from somebody suggesting that you get tested for an STD? Would you be mad that this was the route being taken or just be happy they let you know?
And because I’m going to Hell, let’s come up with some cards of our own!
Now make it clap.
-VSB P aka TANGLE JIG P aka THE ARSONIST
whats the difference between herpes and love??
herpes lasts forever! go get checked!
herpes is the gift that keeps on giving.
you ain’t lying V.E.G. and for those of you who missed my PSA a couple of months ago… 3 words: herpetic
eye disease. i know because i worked for a corneal surgeon in the ATL that treated this…with corneal transplants!!! think before you take that next shot in the eye…lol.
Oh my goodness…that does NOT sound fun AT ALL!! (major understatement)
WOW!!! that is so not funny
I’ve actually about cases like this-just gross!
Yep…I’ve heard of this.
There’s all kinds of nastiness going on.
I really want to know who is actually taking shots in the eye. People admit to giving head but no one admits to this.
they might admit to receiving a shot in the eye, but they will most likely not admit to ASKING for the eye shot….
cause shots to the eye=hoe sh!t. and not in a good way.
*apologies to any undercover eye shot takers….but i’m just saying…*
see that right there would piss me off to no end. what i got to thinking is this though, what IS the appropriate way to inform somebody that you have an STD? like…there’s really no good way to do it…it aint gonna be a fun convo no matter how you do it…
oh yeah, and in answer to the question…honestly, in my line of work…i see so many cowards doin dumb ish. i would just be grateful that the person let me know. it sucks that they didnt have the cajones to drop a damn voicemail. but shiiiiit, better safe than sorry!
i keep thinking though, what if you dont take it seriously? i think reading a couple of those, my first instinct was to say “stop playin!” it reminds me of those tips cards from the late 90s, when i was in undergrad. you could say dumb stuff like, “your scent is unbearable.” or something of that nature…and those were used in either a joking or a spiteful way…i could see these STD cards being abused and/or dismissed.
I work in public health. the City of Philadelphia STD clinic is right below my office…. Lawd, the DRAMA I have heard outside my window when people get their results…
Broad & Lombard by any chance?
The ugly-blue-regurgitated-swimming-pool-looking-monstrosity…. yes.
Have you been to visit us?
I keed, I keed.
Yeah, I’ve sweated some bullets up in there before
oh, i cant even imagine working in public health on that front! lol…i work with sex addicts. talk about your awkward conversations! i mean, not only have you been up to all sorts of debauchery behind my back, but now i may have a disease because of it!?!? oh HELL naw….
let’s just say the police have been called up here a few times…
once someone almost got got right in front of the building by his “homeboy”
you remember the other night when I told you that we shouldn’t be doing this? that we’re moving too fast?
That’s because I just had a outbreak and needed time for it to go into recession.
Remember later on when you were joking that I may have blinded you with that shot to the face? . . . well. . .it’s probably no longer a joke.
Oh, and really, you believed that I put on a condom with the “pleasure bumps”. I told you we should have done it with the lights on.
Get tested.
LMAO! “pleasure bumps”!!!!
I would merk someone for sending me that E-Card.
“merk” lol…haven’t heard that word in a minute.
Nicki is hardcore!!!!
I like your style.
yep, this is the kind of e-card that you slap a mothertrucker for.
Sending an e-card to tell someone you may or may not have given them an STD is cowardly but it is better than not telling them at all.
However, it is dangerous cuz people may not take it seriously. OR the ish may get filtered into a spam folder and they’ll never get it.
There are reports that folks don’t get the ‘please don’t give blood again and get to the doctor asap’ voice mails left by the Red Cross. If that’s the case, how can we trust email, of all things, to deliver such an important message?
Personally, if I got such a card I would, after a thorough check up by the doctor, generate a list of mo fos I’d need to track down and have a ‘talk’ with.
you have a point about the spam/junk filter. that would be terrible. the red cross ain’t no joke though, in college they would hunt folks down on campus and make sure they got the message. it always seemed part urban myth until someone’s biology lab partner didn’t show up the next day.
Yeah. Red Cross is serious. But I think there is some report of a college ball player who never got the voicemail they left for him. He was out spreading the love…clueless to his status.
As an aside, I gave blood in December and got a letter from the Red Cross about 3 weeks later.
I crumbled to the floor and was trying to figure out who/when/how!
Finally I opened it. Inside was my new donor card and a magnet with my next ‘safe’ date to donate.
this happened to me in HS…. two weeks before graduation. I nearly died in my mother’s kitchen, until I saw what it was. Then I did the best happy dance of my young life…
yeah cause folks be in pure denial about STDS..here is an example
I had a chick I worked with who had been having “female” problems for 3 months and never got it checked out. Even after her ex.came up to the job and glued like 10 of those neon notice cards they give you at the health department on her car… after 2 more dudes blamed her for their “heated situations” she finally went to get checked and told me the nurse performed the test wrong but he treated her for chlamydia just in case… uh yeah
LOL (I posted this on another site so I didnt steal it in case someone thinks I did…I just didnt feel like retyping it)
Wow. and she’s just out there raw dogging with ‘em all, huh? Spreading the love?
Stank azz.
Ewwww.
Jimbo:
We both kept saying over and over that what we shared that night was special. As fate would have it, we may also be sharing the same strain of gonorrhea.
I suggest you see a doctor.
Smooches.
Kenny:
If you are currently experiencing a discharge and/or burning sensation, I am sorry.
There’s a free clinic on Halsted. I remember you saying you didn’t have any coverage.
“There’s a free clinic on Halsted. I remember you saying you didn’t have any coverage.”
MEDIC!
One of my “friends” did something similar too his wife because he wanted a divorce and didn’t know how to tell her…he was too busy trying to leave her for me and get a place in the Caribbean. Typical Ivy pretentious bastard.
wait a sec, is this a faux e-card or a vsb confession?
remember how i always used to say you were crazy? well, fyi, untreated syphilis can cause madness….you should probably go get checked out.
oooh I hate you
“remember how i always used to say you were crazy? well, fyi, untreated syphilis can cause madness”
I think I peed myself
turns out we shared more than an org@sm last week. so, go get tested loverboy. xoxo
i think it would be nice to know who gave you what, so that you could immediately cut that person out of your roster for life…however, finding out is better than nothing. but, what happened to getting tested for stds between partners? it’s not that time consuming and depending on where you live sometimes hiv testing and std testing is free! btw, lookie all the google ads are about testing now…hee, hee. i love technology.
I am a strong believer in getting tested between partners.
For HIV, however, doing so won’t tell you much. The virus can take some time showing up in your system. It’s too late for me to get technical but y’all know.
yeah, but at least they’re going to get tested and willing to find out.
i think i’ve said this before on this site, but man, getting that first HIV test was the most nervewracking thing I’d ever done…but after I found out i was negative…man i tried to get a test done everyday just to confirm it over and over again..lol…i was terribly excited. like i got a new lease on life. and i was so happy i wanted to be excited everyday after.
this same thing happened when i found out i had good credit. lol. i check my credit everyday now just so i can see my score. lol.
My first reaction are usually disbelief. I’m one of those people that thinks that bad sh!t won’t happen to me.
Initial lukewarm response:
“Oh snap son. I just got played through e-mail.”
Then about twenty minutes later I would turn into a raving lunatic.
i think like many other people, i’d think it was a joke b/c really, who sends a damn e-card on some “you’ve got an STD” mess? it seems like a joke all around…
And because I’m going to Hell, let’s come up with some cards of our own!
LMAO. I am trying to incorporate Ja Rules “Clap Back” into my response…its too late. Help People.
I need a girl to ride ride ride but now this shit makes a nigga wanna jump jump because I got the clap back, i scream for police, but I doubt, they’re gonna hear me when I shout. Fack fack faaack!
rofl…good job k.
This whole entry is a dank, wet, stank blanket that is growing mold, moss and fungus.
However, I will say “stay safe, wrap it up, and get tested”.
Peace, I’m OUT this muva!
This whole entry is a dank, wet, stank blanket that is growing mold, moss and fungus.
why exactly is this the case?
she was no where near the first few commenters
My first reaction is almost always disbelief. I’m one of those people that thinks that bad sh*t like that won’t happen to me.
Initial lukewarm response:
“Oh snap son. I just got played through e-mail. Is this for real?
Then about twenty minutes later I would turn into a raving lunatic regretting the day I ever met that person for the rest of my life.
Remember later on when you were joking that I may have blinded you with that shot to the face? . . . well. . .it’s probably no longer a joke.
wow.
ugh u got that song stuck in my head now..lol
Dear D,
While u were getting pushy,pushy in my gushy,gushy..u might get the drippy, drippy.
Sorry boo. Go make an appt.
or.
Remember when you asked about that lil thing on my….and i told you it was a pimple..well…
it wasnt..
Get tested!
*i know it sounds kinda sick, im a lil twisted tonight…wine is not my friend*
last night we got hot heavy and heated
and you deserve an award for the way you beat it
but unfortunately, all I can give you is a warning I hope you heed
take off tomorrow and go and get treated!!
I am mad that you rhymed this. lol.
hey its an e-card it has to rhyme!!! LMAO
okay how about this
Muthf!cka Im Ill
not sick and Im okay
but my crotch sick
and yo co!ck sick
and Im thick
which is why
M!thaF!cka Im ill
hee-haw-larious
LMAO, did we say that at the same time?!
Muthf!cka Im Ill
I’m a venereal disease like a menstrual bleed…
Thru the pencil and leak the sheets of the tablet in my mind
Cause I don’t write sh*t cause I ain’t got time (left)
Cause I Acquire immune deficiency syndromes
like Donald Trump acquires new homes
and the block is hot, the block is hot hot
but so was your, so was your spot, spot
wish he woulda blocked, blocked, blocked
cause i got got, i got got got…..
i aint got the mind right now lol.
wait… Im catching the beat…
the block is hot hot hot
but so is my tw*t tw*t tw*t
lolol… that’s my rhyme contribution for the day. thanx 4 that, overit
pgh muse, you took it that one step further with:
but so is my tw*t tw*t tw*t
lmao, good collabo.
i was just browsing… skimming… not going to try to really read the juicy comments till i got to work… but I HAD to say that this is “hee-haw-larious” (shouts out to Gem)… i cain’t breathe…
I can also go the sentimental route
picture it
there will be a shadowy outline of two people walking away from each other with the tips of their fingers barely touching while the sun sets…..
Our hearts are connected and I remember how much you claimed to care, and my memories fill the lonely nights marking the last time you were there.
and right before i pick up the phone to tell you how much you are missed
I remind myself how lucky I am to only have gotten off with an itch…
you guessed it..
get tested
Shay-d-Lady, I just had a thought LMAO. Don’t you think your line would apply here?
“Muthaf**ah I’m ILL.
LMAO I was already on it… Great minds think alike….
let me try. limerick style…
there once was a girl named “sue”
who had a late raw night with you
she cried “ooch ooch ow”
so, she’s at the doctor now
that clap having girl named “sue”
LMAO @ limerick style…i am intrigued yet scared at what fu*kery tomorrow’s crowd will bring.
your faulty-fooly-wang may have added insult to the injury that was your wackness. get tested.
dang girl.
how you gonna tell a man he might have an STD AND insult his chex game in the same e-card?
lol.
low.blow.
Sit Boo-Boo sit, umm, remember that movie You Got Mail? Well there is an awesome new film, by the same people called You Got AIDS.
No really, you got AIDS.
Or the direct approach courtesy of Champ:
You might have AIDS and sh*t.
“You might have AIDS and sh*t.”
omg!!! make it stop! i just choked from laughing so hard.
d@mn. lmao.
HAHAHAHAHA
Sup, homie:
the good news is that it’s curable.
the bad news is that you may have it.
Make a pit stop at your PCP to find out.
now see, that’s reasonable…lol. almost. its a little too cavalier about my cajones though…but at least i wouldnt’ want to stab you…
I tried to put a positive spin on it. lol.
“My bad. Turns out that wasn’t a mosquito bite…”
“My passion for you burns bright. Unfortunately, so does my urinary tract”
“I recently took delivery of a package, and it wasn’t from UPS. Get tested.”
“I just found out, like The Prodigy, i’m a firestarter. Sorry if I left you with a burning bush…”
“There’s a Piranha Plant in my pipe, and it may have bitten your warp zone. Call Dr. Mario to find out…”
There’s no end to this!
There’s a Piranha Plant in my pipe, and it may have bitten your warp zone. Call Dr. Mario to find out…”
LMAO!!!! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lpk5U70MQBg
“I just found out, like The Prodigy, i’m a firestarter. Sorry if I left you with a burning bush…”
hehe–burning bush. good one.
“There’s a Piranha Plant in my pipe, and it may have bitten your warp zone. Call Dr. Mario to find out…”
*crying*
flirty? oh uh uh. if i got an “anonymous” email, i’d be grateful that I got a heads up. and then i’d have to go to his job and raise hell. because, let’s face it, how anonymous is it, really? i’m not running a revolving door up in here.
as for my email, i would go for a mid 90′s throwback approach:
boy you’ll never find anotha love as good as this
cause my love is the ish.
cause i might have the ish.
boy you’ll never find anotha love as good as this
cause i gave you the ish.
so go get tested. and sh!t. (insert smiley face here).
he might be sad for a minute, but thanks to me, he’s remembered another song to limewire.
you said i was your best, but i might just be your last. go get checked out stallion. peace.
you were right, that c%ndom did expire, and with it so did your protection. my secret is out, go get tested.
you were naughty last night, but so was i…i have more than a few tricks up my sleeve. ya catch my drift? if not get tested, you’ll find out soon enough. later homie.
if it’s any consolation, you ain’t the only one itchin’. remember, a little penicillin never hurt nobody. mwah!
Hey I was so upset about how it all ended…
I had to let it burn
it was either your d!ck or your car
arent you glad
I chose the first option?
GET TESTED!!!
I had to cover up my laughter with a coughing fit…I need job…
I hate all ya’ll…LOL
Holy ish…lmao!!!
“I had to let it burn
it was either your d!ck or your car”
This made me sad.
this was quite funny.
10 points for incorporating previous posts into your f*ckery.
kudos. and culo.
My neck, my back…
You’ve got herpes and the clap.
Get tested buddy.
It’s all fun and games ’til someone copy and pastes your e-card idea and sends it to you. Ouch! lol
classic.
My neck, my back…
You’ve got herpes and the clap.
Get tested buddy.
lmao… mmm mmm mmm…
I got a joke for you
knock knock
who’s there?
Aids
Aids who?
knock, knock
whos there
Aids
Aids who?
knock knock
whose there
just Aids
and you may have it
hey some shyt just aint funny, this is one them thangs
Get tested…
we’re all just rounding up frequent flyer miles to hell right now. at least i’ll have friends there.
this is the song that never ends
it just goes on and on my friends
some people starting doing it we joined in just because
now im singing this song to let you it technically was applause
so clap b**ch!
omgosh, someone put me to beeed.
We now share something that will last a lifetime
Goodnews.. its not a kid
Bad news? its herpes…. the gift that keeps on giving
you said you never wanted children
well I might have helped you out a bit
Chlamydia has been found to cause male sterility….Get tested
You know how they say that hypertension is the silent killer?
Well so is chlamydia
get tested
You remember that Chappelle skit where Dylon “spit hot fiyah”? Well apparently, so do I
Get tested
And I am going to catch Chelsea Lately and go to bed
Good night
Sleep tight
dont let the bed bugs bite
oh thats not a bed bug
thats the clap
clap on clap off
Get tested!!
Panama, given the immense popularity of VSB, thank you for this public service announcement disguised as a post, whether you intended it to be or not. Having worked in the helping profession for over 20 years, the way people respond to bad news is extremely varied. I’ve written several articles on my blog about this if any of you are interested.
I was shocked to learn recently that there’s a virus far more common than herpes called HPV. Some strains cause cervical cancer or genital warts. In a New Mexico study, 1/3 of women and 1/2 of men had it.
One of my clients committed murder over this in the 90′s. That’s a substory in my post last week, Saving Grace & Saving Girls: Pros & Cons of the HPV Vaccine
I also had very promiscuous client who said he’d infect everyone he could if he ever got HIV infected. Did that story over the summer, http://keepittrill.blogspot.com/2008/06/hiv-behind-that-smile.html
And then there’s a very small population of the destitute who actually want to catch HIV. That September article is titled, Chasing HIV For Benefits.
Unprotected sex can be deadly. Even untreated chlamydia, often silent, in a woman can kill the children she’ll never have. I’ve often wondered if this is why my fallopian tubes were ruined after an abortion I had at 19. They never tested for this back then. It was very sad, and I learned that life rarely goes as you plan it. The best we can do sometimes is share our stories with others so maybe they’ll have a better chance. I wrote a small book-length story about this, Abortion Blues: When One Person Wants It & The Other Doesn’t.
your welcome…i did and didn’t intend it to be a PSA of sorts. i didnt b/c clearly there’s a jokey and ignorant nature to this post…but at the same time, who DOESN’T want to get tested or know their status, etc. everybody would be upset if they got this kind of thing and it behooves ALL OF US to do everything in our power so that we don’t…
we here at VSB.com promote safe chex and frequent testing…and once you know you good…ignorance.
thank you and good night.
See I knew you was on that level! W/ a name like KIT I guess you got to be. Love the comment mayne
i’m a south african, and stereotypes aside – our HIV/AIDS rate are waaaaay to high here to make that kind of thing viable – you’d be responsible for someone’s nervous breakdown, or, more evilly, a rampage of random sex with a bunch of strangers as an act of twisted ‘revenge’. the denial is deep.
a friend of mine, the second woman in S.A. to come out about her HIV status (and was summarily ostracised for YEARS) got it from her older -guy boyfriend – a whole doctor, no less, who KNEW his status, and ‘didn’t want to go down alone’. So he picked a college beauty in the engineering facility (an achievement, espesh for a black woman) and did this nonsense…. she’s an amazing HIV/AIDS activist today, and still kickin’ 14 years later…
but to return to the point – no, i do not see this service working here…
Superwoman, yes! I’ve seen that twisted revenge on the innocent too. A partner’s educational status, as you pointed out, doesn’t necessarily make him or considerate of the innocent, much the same way racism operates in well-educated people who know better. There is something about that disease that makes a small group of people ‘snap’ mentally and become dangerous. Thanks for sharing that story.
see, folks that do that type of stuff disgust me. i know that misery loves company but that should just mean you both watch sad movies and eat ice cream all night…not that you intentionally give somebody something that may kill them b/c you messed up.
those people should be sent to live in a remote part of Siberia and be forced to watch Tyler Perry’s House of Payne 24/7…WITH NO COMMERCIAL BREAKS!
that’s a severe and worthy punishment.
It’s everywhere. There was a story in Kenya how some girl went about sleeping with guys in her university professors and students alike and posted their names on a board informing that they might be infected as she was. It almost caused a riot but the sad thing is that I doubt whether alot of those guys got tested at all and are probably still are spreading it around.
In true CBG-style, I have soaked my favorite denim comforter in the tub overnight and I am throwin’ it over all of your heads!!!
I can’t find anything humorous in sexually transmitted infections. Nothing. People are dying from STI’s. Brown people like me. Little kids and babies, due to some HORRIBLE circumstances much worse than contracting it @ birth have died of AIDS and HIV-related diseases.
I love VSB. Even got my shirt and erry’thang. I adore all the VSBers and sprinkle glitter upon all your heads. But there are simply some things PBG can’t laugh and joke about.
well, we here at VSB HQ appreciate your wetblanketism. however, wrapped up in the jokes and the ignant approach is a lesson to learn in getting tested.
as in we should all be doing it…and by it, i mean getting tested. or at least have been tested before…
its jokes…but its not at the same time.
Don’t mind me. I’m just back to retrieve my soggy comforter. I would like to hang it out to dry. I still consider it my fave, even though it’s been tossed on all of your heads today. It’s gettin’ cold @ night now, ya dig??
PBG
I feel your pain. Truly. And the wet blanket was duly noted. Working in this field can make you a bit hardcore– its a defense mechanism. We have to joke sometimes to keep from being depressed with the stories that come through here.
But trust, the magnitude of the epidemic never escapes us.
I THINK I would just appreciate the notification to get tested after I called on the Lawd, of course!
But lets keep it real, unless you’re running a wh0re house…it can’t be too hard to figure who might have left you burning.
This all just goes to show that the world is going to hell…we’re now sending a “burn notice” through email…Jeebus help us all!!!
I agree with this whole comment…lol
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See a e-mail like that could get someone hurt. Now you got this person not knowing which one of his/her mates gave them the clap. They might end up hurting someone. so sad
I’ve been hearing a lot about the virus in African communities (sex with a virgin to “cure” the disease – usually rape of young girls, careless sex with as many people as possible as a form of “revenge”) – I am at a loss of what would make one person, let alone a bumch of people, think this way. I could use some enlightenment on this one, African sibs. Am I misinformed? Are these the actions of a few sick (in the head) folks, or is it a common situation? Is it education? Religious belief? What? Is it generational?
Here in the DMV (that’s DC, MD and VA) there is a high rate of HIV infections, particularly for young black women. It seems like every other racial demographic is catching on to protection, and for some reason we (black women) are not. Part of this could be the down low, but I think that’s just finger pointing. My sexual health is my responsibility, and it’s too important to entrust it to someone else even for a moment. On that note, I get tested about every 3-6 months, regardless of my sexual activities, and certainly after a new partner has entered or exited my life. That ish can creep up on you. There are so many places around here that will do it for free, it’s ridiculous not to get tested.
I’ve also noticed alot of times that when dj’s are giving those last calls at the club and saying goodbye to the folks, they warn everyone to strap up. One even says, “Someone will leave here and contract HIV. Don’t let it be you.”
Maybe I’ll be able to come up with a good e-card in a moment, but this ish kinda depresses me. Sad face.
“I’ve been hearing a lot about the virus in African communities (sex with a virgin to “cure” the disease – usually rape of young girls, careless sex with as many people as possible as a form of “revenge”) ”
I’ve read about it, and this upsets me.
And this is why I wish we’d seen Eazy-E as he was dying. I wish we could share in the death of someone, not even someone famous. Because that makes it REAL. It’s all wonderful to see Magic and others walking around looking regular. But that’s not making people really pay attention. We need to give the real suffering of HIV a face–sorta like what has been done with breast cancer. But people are so freaking uptight, they don’t wanna hear anything about a disease that’s sex related. I think if MORE people got to SEE what it’s really like in those last few months when someone dies, they’d think once, maybe not twice, but once.
“I wish we could share in the death of someone, not even someone famous. Because that makes it REAL.”
I have, and this is why I have no snarky e-card ideas.
My cousin who would’ve been just 37 this year died of AIDS a few years back. He contracted the disease from his wife who had been steppin’ out on him w/one of her ex’s.
Another cousin of mine’s little girl was raped as a toddler (yes, raped. as in “took off her diaper”.) by a mentally disturbed man and contracted HIV and died 2 weeks before her 13th birthday.
It’s a hard thing to see. OK?
I’m sorry to hear this.
i know two people personally who’ve succumbed to AIDS and in high school a good friend of mine got one of those letters from Red Cross after donating Blood that she was HIV-positive…
and no it aint a pretty sight. for anybody to see.
as far as the snarky e-card ideas, technically, we’re just adding to the canon that’s already been created by inSpot.org. more ways for people to realize they need to get teseted. admittedly, ignant, but the same end result if you were to get one of those cards…
**draggin’ soggy blanket behind me like Linus**
Well, for the record, I can get down w/the snarkiest of the snarky, without a doubt. But on this one, I will let my fellow VSBers do their thing. I just don’t have that in me.
And as for that e-card, I hope like h3ll I never get one from anybody, but if that’s the best they can do, at least I was informed.
This is horrible to hear. But it’s real. This is not a game people. As for the rape, this happens way more than you ever hear about. People give kids all types of STD’s. A lot of times, the kids don’t report it to the parents. The symptoms clear up, and then they give it to another kid.
Just to add to the depression:
My fam works with special needs kids, and the number of them that are sexually abused is absolutely insane. Keep an eye out for kids and old people. They need us to watch out for them, and kick azz when the need arises. Especially if they are non-verbal.
**snuggling into freshly laundered linus blankie.**
My fam works with special needs kids, and the number of them that are sexually abused is absolutely insane.
I hate people bothering innocent children. It’s like really painful to me… there is definitly a greater need to kick a$$ on behalf of the babies… one incident can cause a child pain for years to come. It’s sad. I see young mothers out here walking around and babies are like the new accessory these days… their too scared to protect themselves, much less their babies. it’s just sad.
This almost made me cry. I work with special needs kids a lot. Long story, I thought I was going into special education, but did not. This is fu**ing insane and…I can’t even think of a fitting punishment, but I hope they get theirs.
PBG, I hear you. I know I act a fool on here but nothing is funny about this. I am really sorry if any of this opened any wounds. I know we don’t mean it:(
hiya – some corrupt traditional healers put it out there to desperate HIV + patients that if they slept with a virgin, they’d rid themselves of the virus. so they end up choosing young girls coz the chances of them being non-sexually active are obviously higher. it’s sick, and there’s a lot of work being done to combat it.
hope that helps!
It is true that there is the myth that sleeping with virgins will make it go away. There’s also the fact that it is so hidden in African society. Admitting that you have it means that you are stigmatised losing your job and family and friends. Here it’s not so easy to pack up and move because somehow there’s always someone connected to your circle and the stigma follows. It doesn’t help that there are traditions that encourage the spread of HIV-AIDS with wife inheritance and ish.
Even with the big cats the educated ones the traditions are still there only it’s kept under wraps. Traditionally it was meant to happen so that the widow and her children were taken care of. True there are the poor women for women with no source of income but it defies reality when the said woman can take care of the family. It’s sick and the worst is that they sometimes only do it to steal the family’s wealth and ish. That aside there’s the whole hooking up with a rich man to get your life in order mentality that sadly afflicts enough women regardless if they can make their own money or not. They just want more. As you can imagine they won’t be the only ones. So you have a politician dying of Aids infecting his three wifes an countless clandes ( slang for clandestinely kept women) In the last government we had about five ministers who are rumoured to have died from Aids but it’s always blamed on something else. Hows that for a role model.
When Barack Obama came down he got tested in public and encouraged our leaders to do the same to end the stigma attached. Well since then none of them have dared so it just perpetuates the spread.
Yeah…I don’t know how I’d take it if I got one of those e-cards. Well, I do know how I’d take it, I’d be on fire!!!! (I guess literally and figuratively).lol
I think this is a punk-arse way to break the news to someone. I mean, if you’re old enough to get down, you should be a mature enough adult to let someone know face to face or at least over the phone that you might’ve gave them a gift that keeps on giving….lol
Word to the wise, ladies be selective, and make sure they strap up.
I don’t think being selective has much to do with it. For the most part, you can’t look at someone and see they have something. If you could, so many Black women wouldn’t be getting HIV. It’s a point of being dishonest and not taking health seriously. I know someone who got the herpes from her FIRST boyfriend. He knew and he didn’t tell her until he HAD to. You know AFTER she realized something wasn’t right and went to the dr. He went on to marry and we wonder if the wife even knows.
But here’s my thing, people seem to talk/joke way more about herpes than about HIV. If I had to order them in list of what’s worse, HIV/AIDS is at the tippy-top of the list cus that shyt doesn’t just kill a mood, it kills people. Why do y’all think more ppl are vocal about not getting herpes instead of HIV?
“Why do y’all think more ppl are vocal about not getting herpes instead of HIV?”
Not sure…but my “be selective comment” was just meaning, not to bed anyone, just because you have the oppurtunity to. I understand that this won’t keep your free from infection, but raw dogging 20 dudes/chicks just because you’re able, isn’t sure to help you out either. Acting on impulse will have you making bad decisions.
I know that you can never be too careful and there are always exceptions, sorry to hear about your friend. That’s messed up. Strapping up wouldn’t have helped in her case since Herp is from skin to skin contact. That’s a whole nother thing to contend with. He was a punk for not letting her know.
“Why do y’all think more ppl are vocal about not getting herpes instead of HIV?”
fear.
Cuz her Pee can be spread through casual contact. I mean the virus can stay around on a dry surface and transmitted to an unsuspecting vic. Who knows if the HIV will develop this ability. Until scientists can furthur and definatively do better about fixing or understanding these dirty motho fokkos. Sidewalk councelors are not gonna be on that ‘watch out for this shyt too.’
HSV2 is far too fragile to be transmitted by contact with a surface. Skin to skin contact (while a person is asymptomatic but actively shedding the virus) or contact with a sore is the only way to spread the infection.
That sore’s puss is full of the virus. When I was a medic they warned us that any surface could give you the bizz. Practically made us act like the patient had mrsa if that patient had the herp.
Spreadable like the common cold or hep b. I always figured it was like if some of the puss dried up it could still carry and pass along the virus.
it will be there for a few minutes sure…. DON’T HANDLE PATIENTS WITHOUT GLOVES. Assume everyone is contagious than a mug. that’s why you are supposed to take Universal Precautions. But we all know medical staff are the worst offenders when it comes to that.
H3ll, I know docs that don’t wash their hands between patients or after they use the restroom… I know… SIIIIIIICCCCCKKK
@ B.B. Mo’…EWWWW!!
I’m a childcare provider and the #1 rule when working w/my young lovelies is frequent and effective hand washing!! We get the same OSHA training that clinicians get, cuz kids keep some dayum germs spreading. Every time I wipe a nose or a butt, I’m washing my hands. I can’t imagine not washing hands between patients!! That is disgusting!!
Burning passion is better than burning genitals. You’ll know about both if you don’t get tested in the next 24-48 hours!
Herp Doggy Dogg says check yo self homie. Fo shizzle.
I thought of something…You could just send ‘em the link to either one fo the songs and see if they get the point…lol
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SH5a-deHquc
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ux0MSUefK3A
(forward to 4:15)
Oh yeah…they are work-safe if you have headphones…lol
I read this. I wasn’t clear if the note is signed or not. But remember a few weeks ago when I said the thing about getting checked out before/after anyone new? I don’t care how many condoms you use, you can still get stuff. Better safe than sorry. You shouldn’t NEED anyone to tell you to get checked out.
Oh I’m supposed to do a card…
Roses are red
Violets are blue
People get cooties
Go get your ass checked out.
Word to Chamillionaire….you are officially Ridin’ Dirtaaay!
oh.my.goodness.
Do you like slurpees?
What about herpe.s?
Get tested.
This one made me laugh
On the serious tip, I had an ex tell me they had herpes, so I did go get tested and that whole rigamarole. But what bothered me was that fool told me but not the rest of their long, long list of exes and exploits (the primary reason for the breakup) , so I had to tell it. It didn’t seem fair to that all these other women may have been walking around not knowing they may have been exposed. Do you think I was wrong for giving those ladies the heads up? Do snithces get stitches in this situation?
You weren’t wrong. I think you may have gotten three Heaven points for that.
I wouldnt say three heaven points, maybe three lesee hell points
I concur
Nope…that was public service my friend…
I agree. I think you did a good thing.
Yeah, i don’t think you can actually be wrong for doing ACTUAL community service. That’s volunteer work of the highest magnitude. As many health problems as people are faced with these days, he was being completely irresponsible for not telling people.
I’m with the Heaven points on this one.
Re: Heaven points: Everyone who comments on this page needs to get them the best way y’all can cus y’all say some crazy, sick in the head stuff. Like how I said y’all and not US?? Hee-hee.
There is no us in team my friend, lol
This makes me sad that we’ve devolved to such a point where (A) mofos still feel the need to engage in questionable behavior and (B) punk arses would rather send an e-card rather than just
(wo)man up. Anywhoo…here’s my attempt at a card…
I’m sorry I only lasted five seconds
But I may have left you something extra to remember me by
Visit any STD clinic of your choice to find out what that “something” is!
“This makes me sad that we’ve devolved”
I don’t think it’s a matter that we have devolved but more so its an issue of the generation that is more involved with their computers and ish…
I mean look at us here on VSB, I feel like I know most of you and the only person I ever met face to face is Liz. But yet we sit on here day after day and spill out some of the most intimate ish. Yet, there is a level of anonymity. If anything I see it as using yet another resource to get a message to someone, is it the best? probably not.
I had a point but I forgot what it was, maybe I shouldn’t have licked Champ’s toast this morning
I suppose that’s true…but still. An e-mail, playa…that’s just wack.
I didn’t read any comments yet, so I hope this hasn’t been said already.
There are pros and cons to this IMHO. I like the idea of this service because this will result in less ninjas being harmed by someone finding out that you just gave them an STD. I know if one of my ex-jumpoffs came at me, telling me some ish like that I would probably flip the eff out. This is ground for smacking a bitch!
The bad side of this is people taking the e-card as a joke. Also, who the hell would know some random jumpoff’s email address, to send them an e-card anyway? I barely know the freaking names of some of my past jumpoffs, let alone there email address.
If your scared to tell someone you might have passed an STD on to them, then I think Clinic’s should start an annomyous phone service to break the bad news.
“. Also, who the hell would know some random jumpoff’s email address, to send them an e-card anyway? I barely know the freaking names of some of my past jumpoffs, let alone there email address. ”
I was thinking the same thing.
I was too…
if you dont know someones name why.the.he.ll are you diggin em raw?
and the clinic does call people anonymously, well the ones in NY do anyway…
I have to agree with this. There’s no excuse for unprotected anonymous sex in 2008. None at all.
I actually think its a damn good idea. I’d rather get one of these ecards and know than never be told because someone was too ashamed to tell me. Just think about how that face to face convo would go….do you see it?? Its not pretty. I’m all for anything that encourages communication and information.
I think I would take the news better if someone used a singing telegram service for me, like you see on TV. At least you would get a song & a dance out of it . . .
Do people actually do that?
next time you go to the bar…
order a tetracycline martini on me
I love you.
remember when we bumped uglies?
well you may have ugly bumps
happy halloween!
LMAO!
Now THAT is funny.
LMAO @ my office at check out time.
WOW! I just sent The Champ a card from this site yesterday-I hope it didn’t go into his spam folder
“WOW! I just sent The Champ a card from this site yesterday-I hope it didn’t go into his spam folder”
………………………………………..
you know I e-love you
check your spam folder
I saw the article the other day too, and I was a bit stunned when I saw some of the e-cards. For so many of the folks in our generation STD’s are a fact of life. I guess it was only a matter of time until our culture of sexual promiscuity caught up to our tech savy.
Although I couldn’t imagine using one of these e-cards, I can understand why some people would want to. It’s impersonal and highly insensitive but it’s better than the alternative of never knowing.
it was the sore…
it was cold…
it was the cold sore… and sh*t
“gets on her Public Health Soap Box*
As insensitive and chicken sh!t as it may seem, Cali DPH may be onto something with this. It is astounding the number of people who are in denial about their infection status… viral or bacterial and proceed to just keep it moving like nothing is wrong. This is almost always out of fear. Fear of rejection, retaliation or being ostracized by the community. Giving people a non-confrontational method of notifying their partners could only help the situation. But, I would like to see their model and efficacy research before I go suggesting this to my colleagues.
On a more clinical note…
People don’t know that there are two viral STD’s that are more virulent (read: easier to transmit, more likely to cause disease) than HIV. Those would be HPV and Hepatitis B/C. The good news is you can be VACCINATED against both.
Ladies, if you are still under the age of 26, get your HPV vaccination STAT. Most people who have HPV never know it and never have symptoms. Sometimes your body clears the virus itself, but other times, you can get cervical dysplasia, a precursor to cervical cancer.
*gets off soap box*
Now… for my free ticket to H3ll…
::channels R. Kelly::
Its unbelieveable how my crotch is burnin, its true
And I think yours might be buring too..
My crotch is burnin’ cause of you
*Father, forgive me.*
**patiently waiting for BbMo to get off the soapbox***
oh she’s done, my turn,
Ever since the ex (that I was with for 14 years) cheated on me I learned a valuable lesson.
Get tested at least once a year.
Every year on December 1. (World AIDS Day) I get tested for EVERYTHING, (HIV, Herpes, TB, Hepatitis, HPV…you get the point). It’s actually how I discovered I had an issue with my thyroid (another story for another day).
My decision for getting tested once a year came after I shared the story (with a good friend of mine) about the ex’s betrayal she informed me that she had contracted Herpes from someone and didn’t know for years. See, she had been raped at a young age; she didn’t become s3xually active until her college years, but during high school she had her first outbreak, and it was years after she had had s3x.
You see women can carry something like Herpes and it be dormant and flare up during a stressful time, or because you changed your diet, whatever. It can just lay dormant and non symptomatic for a long time. Or you can just be a carrier and never have an outbreak but actually be able to infect others.
So I urge you good people of VSB, get checked annually even if you been with the same person since puberty, you could be protecting yourself and others.
That is all….
back to your regularly scheduled foolishness
“So I urge you good people of VSB, get checked annually even if you been with the same person since puberty, you could be protecting yourself and others.”
I completely co-sign this. And practice what I preach/co-sign.
“Ladies, if you are still under the age of 26, get your HPV vaccination STAT. Most people who have HPV never know it and never have symptoms. Sometimes your body clears the virus itself, but other times, you can get cervical dysplasia, a precursor to cervical cancer.”
Your birthday is really important for this shot as well. It’s a 3 part series…intial shot, 2 months later, and 4 months after the second shot. You have to complete the entire cycle BEFORE you turn 27.
Just started my treatments and I make it by literally 2 weeks.
oh crap pleas look this stuff up b4 u try it cuz I heard via sidewalk councelors that it it killin bytches. Select few but killin no less.
even though i’m over the age, the nurse in my docs office was even telling me she wasn’t doing it.
Yo it’s Tuskeegee xperiment all over? If you let Dick Gregory tell it interferon is like that too. He was on tv one talking about how the chemical was taken from the testes of inmates in england and the practice spread. Oh and shortly after said extraction the inmates were dieing. This is a drug for the Pamela Andersons of the world. I don’t know when I took A & P though I thaught everyone’s immune system made interferon. I want to have a sit down w/ Mr. conspiracy theorist Gregory & his people too.
Here is a little card/song I made up to break the news to a mpoff. This is via the Jazmine Sullivan song “bust you windows”, so without futher or due DJ HIT MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!
I had to shave the hair up off my balls
And no I’m not no porno star
I have crabs and they leave these ugly scars
But right now I don’t care about that part
I shaved the hair up off my balls
Because they were orders from my doctor
I didn’t wanna but I took my turn
I’m glad I did it cause these crabshurt…
I must admit it helped a little bit
I hope your nasty stank @ss gets tested
I should have known from your foul stench
But that’s why they say “Life’s a bitch”
You can’t give every man your Pu**y
Tell them your clean and don’t mean it
Your actually a little juvenile
I should have never trusted a big butt and a smile
I shaved the hair up off my balls
You know I did it cause you left your mark
I want to beat you with a crowbar
And run you over with my old @ss car
I shaved the hair up off my balls
this is sadly entertaining. that would be a singing e-card for that ass.
THE FOLLOWING IS THE CENSORED VERSION OF MY ORIGINAL POST THAT’S CURRENTLY BEING MODERATED.
Here is a little card/song I made up to break the news to a jumpoff. This of course, is via the Jazmine Sullivan song “bust you windows”, so without futher or due . . . .
DJ HIT MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!
I had to shave the hair up off my b@lls
And no I’m not no porno star
I have crabs and they leave these ugly scars
But right now I don’t care about that part
I shaved the hair up off my b@lls
Because they were orders from my doctor
I didn’t wanna but I took my turn
I’m glad I did it cause these crabs hurt…
I must admit it helped a little bit
I hope your nasty stank @ss gets tested
I should have known from your foul stench
But that’s why they say “Life’s a b!tch”
You can’t give every man your Pu**y
Tell them your clean and don’t mean it
Your actually a little juvenile
I should have never trusted a big butt and a smile
I shaved the hair up off my b@lls
You know I did it cause you left your mark
I want to beat you with a crowbar
And run you over with my old @ss car
I shaved the hair up off my b@lls
You said you loved the long brown legs
The hair a’flowing too
We went back to your place that night
And did the freakin do.
A very nice young chap you are
And I hate to break this to you
But I’m more radioactive than chernobyl
Go get tested, boo.
wow, 2 points for throwing in a manmade disaster.
‘Remember how much you said you loved eating crabs, turns out you may have really ate some…
…take that ass to the clinic’
if i got one of those cards, to be honest, i would just be glad for the heads up… aint no use in being mad because it takes 2 to tango.
im not justifying, but i can understand why people dont like to get tested and worse more tell soemone if they come back with soemthing. I get tested regularly, and when i go to the free clinic, they ask all types of questions, like have you ever been paid for s*x, etc. im sure its statistical and it doesnt bother me personally, but i know some people might feel disrespected with someone asking them that… i went for a free rapid HIV test not too long ago and the counselor made me feel like i was messing with strangers, he was like, would you give him the PIN off your debit card? no! then why are you having sex with him without a condom? and i was like um, first of all i been with my partner for 5 years… he just kept talking like i didnt say that, lmao… it was crazy.
with the stigma attached to STDs, its no surprise to me the hesitation people have when telling their partners about their status… we kinda forget that you can get an STD from someone you really trust (that you shouldn’t have in hindsight, but still did)…
Shay I hear ya, I was with my man for 14 years and he didn’t know my pin. Now granted I knew his and his ss#. But I’m just saying
I think it’s a great idea. If just one person who would otherwise keep his/her mouth shut tells a former partner to get tested, it’s a lifesaver. Literally.
As for folks who may dismiss it as a joke, dude, if something like this is considered funny in your circle, you need more people. Even if I thought it could never be me, something like this would weigh so heavily on my mind that the next time I went for a physical I’d ask for an extra test…just in case.
thats a good point…i may want to dismiss it, but you really don’t know if its a joke or not. it very well may sit on my mind until i get myself tested…
two things:
1. for a relationship-themed site, this subject is the wettest possible blanket. as a few people mentioned upthread, though, when you consider our (lascivious) audience i guess we do have some what of an obligation to at least mention std’s at some point, even jokingly. i’m glad p did it, cause i wouldnt have touched this with a twenty foot pole, lol.
2. is there is a crueler irony in life than the fact that people are dying as a result of the life-making process? seriously…can anyone think of anything else thats more puzzling and mind-screwing than that?
“2. is there is a crueler irony in life than the fact that people are dying as a result of the life-making process? seriously…can anyone think of anything else thats more puzzling and mind-screwing than that?”
Good point. The one thing that is THE greatest thing can take you out if you’re not careful.
Sometimes I wish I was born in the 40′s/50′s. Our parents were lucky. Anything you got then could be cured with penicillin, unless it was a baby, and then…you know the rest.
“Good point. The one thing that is THE greatest thing can take you out if you’re not careful.
Sometimes I wish I was born in the 40’s/50’s. Our parents were lucky. Anything you got then could be cured with penicillin, unless it was a baby, and then…you know the rest.”
I have said this before, to be born at an earlier time (without the slavery/racism element of course) would have been ideal. I began engaging in premarital coitus after 18 years of being chided for not doing so (not the entire 18 years but you get the picture) . . . My grandmother and grandfather were their firsts and their lasts . . . (unless someone is lying) . . . this is what I wanted for myself . . . now, wanting to end up with someone who hasn’t enjoyed the crotch region (or even the emotional attachment and baggage) of numerous women/men is almost an impossibility
i think this is truly the best way to live… and it even says in the bible “lucky is the man who hasn’t married” – please don’t ask for chapter and verse cuz i don’t know… it does say that tho. anywho… people leave their babies to the wolves these days. Young kids get turned out early… by the time they’re 18 they know and have done waaayyy too much. You are lucky to have you’re grandparent’s example.
Umm, the fact that we aging is a result of certain cells dying in our bodies and not being replaced at the same rate as when we were younger. That this is due to our mitochrondria generating free radicals (toxic radioactive particles) as a byproduct of breaking down ATP for energy. These free radicals then go on to poison our cells slowly but surely until they get to the point where they no longer divide.
So, the very process of living itself is what is killing us.
But don’t take my word for it, go to your local library and read a book.
This was all Reading Rainbow like . . . I feel like getting on the magic school bus.
Try The Pericone Prescription.
“2. is there is a crueler irony in life than the fact that people are dying as a result of the life-making process? seriously…can anyone think of anything else thats more puzzling and mind-screwing than that?”
The thing is MOST people aren’t engaging in the activity to “create life”…they’re doing it for the pure pleasure/endulgence. When people are driven by emotions and hormones, they sometimes fail to take the necessary procautions to prevent such things from happening…one of which is bedding randoms.
I’m with Kam on this one – death is part of the circle of life (cue Elton here…)
I try not to question God on this one, though. He has lots of ways to cull the herd, and illness is just one of them.
… i was reading those posts linked from KIT’s blog and she makes a great point where she says that everything man touches gets corrupted. I’m not preaching or being judgemental… I’m just saying i think that if we all (males and females) alike respected our bodies more and respected s*x more (it’s definitely more than recreation as people tend to see it these days) then maybe we wouldn’t be in this holy predicament.
2. is there is a crueler irony in life than the fact that people are dying as a result of the life-making process? seriously…can anyone think of anything else thats more puzzling and mind-screwing than that?
it definitely makes one think. it makes me think about those people who advocate that we are not meant to be with just one person, monogamy is not for humans. how do you factor in std’s into that argument?
True Story . . .
Some girl scared the SH!T out of me last year . . . she calls me during an ACCOUNTING class nonetheless and tells me to get tested. . . but when I found out the reason she THOUGHT she had an STD (sore from getting her back blown out) and that she actually didnt have it. . . I wanted to off her even more . . . Sure we wore condoms but you never know! WRAP IT UP SON!
Lesson learned . . . don’t tell ME until you are SURE because im likely to come around and kill you . . . dying for no reason would suck . . . GOOD TALK!
IVR, I think you just attempted a self-sprinklin’ of glitter.
“IVR, I think you just attempted a self-sprinklin’ of glitter.”
This is a possibility . . . *dusting off self sprinkled glitter* Am I good now?
No, keep your glitter! It’s good however you can get it. But it was just a wee bit funny to me, you sprinkling it on yourself. Kinda reminded me of how I reach my arm around to scratch my own back.
Oh yeah PJ, I had to pull up the Zhane…I forgot how much I loved this song. The vocals, the harmonies, the simplistic music…man!!!
Yep. My faves were Vibe, You’re Sorry Now, and Crush.
I forgot about Vibe…on youtube now….lol
bit*h did u burn me? get some antibiotics in ur life hoe.
gangsta & ha-lar-e-ous!
real talk I’m mad my mind’s ear of what his voice sounds like matches what you read too. ahahhahaa
I am going to hell because I want to send everyone I know a bogus e-card telling them they should get tested for some sh!t that don’t wash off! I’m sorry but that just sounds like the best prank ever! And in the process I might save a life or two if one of my friends finds out they really do have something as a result of getting tested for my amusement.
As a matter of fact all of you should be afraid. From now on you will never know if you are getting one of those cards from someone you slept with and really wants you to know, or if it’s just me screwing with you behind the curtain of anonymity! ~~~Insert Evil Laugh Here~~~
“I am going to hell because I want to send everyone I know a bogus e-card telling them they should get tested for some sh!t that don’t wash off! I’m sorry but that just sounds like the best prank ever”
Buck I will be along side of you on that trip, cause that is the first thing I thought of too.
I used to work in the STD clinic for my locale. I was one of the unfortunate souls that had to send out communications to persons. Most the time it was a letter, sometimes it was a phone call.
Hi! Is this Bobby Jones? Hi Mr. Jones my name is Cheryl and I am calling from the Peninsula Health Department. We were given your name and number as contact information because someone you might have had sexual relations with in the past year has sought treatment, and we would like to set up an appointment for you to make sure all is well. Is tomorrow at 4pm a good time?
I never ever ever in the history of all the calls I made had ONE PERSON go … “sure tomorrow at 4 is good, see you then.” and that be all they said.
I mostly got … TELL ME WHO THE FECK CAME IN AND ILL COME IN AND GET TESTED AFTER I KILL HER DIRTY B!TCH AZZ!!!
Did you also get the ‘repeat offenders’? We get tons of those.
I’m like… didn’t I see you in here 3 months ago?
Oh yeah, plenty of repeat offenders.
I just would say to them … CONDOMS.
Blackberry I’m coming by to get my test on and see if you can help me find a black male competant family physician in the great state of illadelph.
I’m not an interviewer, i’m an epi. I work upstairs. However, I encourage you to come get your test on. All the good black docs I know don’t practice in PA. Malpractice insurance is a b!tch in this state.
It’s been great catching up since your “fresh out”
The whole time you were away, I was feining for your junk
I went for a check-up and just found out
Babe, there’s somehting funky about your spunk.
Get tested. No, seriously.
“Babe, there’s somehting funky about your spunk.”
Shouts out to Samantha!
I have been thinking of all of this vd talk. N E body remember hearing the talk from High School? Where they would say that when you sleep with one person you not only sleep with them, but everybody that they have slept with. Ugh. I been letting this idea float around in my mental marinade. Well it’s ringing a little too true. There are laws in physics that state that when one thing touches another atoms are exchanged. Kind of like paint swapping in a car accident. (I’m not even going to get into what this could interpret to spiritually). Therefore every strain bearer of std, slept with the original infectee. Kind of like some dracula movies, where if you kill the original dracula you get rid of the other draculas that came after him.
Then there is the idea that you have slept with that nasty zagnut. However indirectly you have (cross contaminationally speaking of coarse). That is why I snarkily giggle @ people who say if they didn’t get their cookies they don’t count them in their ultimate #. Zagnuts Please!
I mean …
………
I am so proud. This post is so easy to understand, my services wont even be needed.
*hands you two slices of wonder bread*
Awwe Joy I made you proud eh? Yup I ain’t been getting my glutton on or enebriated in any other way. Plus I’m kinda tired of being treated like drunk uncle @ the bbq. N E body hungry I’m gonna make some catfish or ooh some salmon croquettes fried green tomatoes and spagetti primavera or should I do shrimp n grits w/ bacon? Speacking of bacon n e body heard of that chicken fried bacon? That stuff sounds like heaveeeeeeen sweeeet like. W/ a side of country gravy yyyeeeaaaahhh.
Ktchn
that sounds deelish! When’s dinner?
I’m catchin the late train meet me in the lobby. lol and you got to say the whole thing for the affect sort of like a tribe called quest. lol aaaahhahahaahahaa
N E body remember that skit on Chapelle’s show w/ the muppets and then q-tip led the vd song. I’d send that in an email and say guess which one you got.
Another thing. What the hades is so impersonal about an email. Shoot people send cecksie notes all the time just because it is an electric note it’s less (hmm how to word this) ballsie? I don’t understand some people when they become obtuse to newer forms of communication.
man this is some toughness…
real talk I dont know how I would feel if it were me to get some news like that on my blackberry. It is good to tell people they have the drips but what if it were the “doom bringer” (H.I.V.)?
it really comes down to individuals defending their own temple.
(side note e-mail is rather impersonal if we have been doing the horiziontal salsa. i know the dance has frequent changes of partner…but you wash your hands when you see they are dirty right? you can see when your tools are dirty too they call it discharge…..)
and thats the truth….Ruth…
“Remember when you said you would kill yourself if you ever got “the AIDs”…well… I guess I’ll see you at the cross-roads!”
“Hey guess what… you and Magic Johnson got something in common…HINT: it’s not an NBA championship. “
This is the funniest ish I read all day!
OMG!!!!
I think I am bout to bust my sides!
@ Intellectual Hedonist….
I. to the izz-H.! What’s good?! Been a minute shawty! I’m glad you found that to be a side-buster.
Can we get a more upbeat post tomorrow? This one was depressing and sh*t.
I propose tomorrow’s topic be as light as possible. This was a bit of a downer…though I’m counting my blessings…
lol V, glad I’m not the only one.