The Definitive List (and Explanation) of Letters That Work As Nicknames » VSB

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The Definitive List (and Explanation) of Letters That Work As Nicknames

Because I’m young, gifted, and Black, I’m prone to nicknames. Hell, my entire life is one big nickname. But being Black means that my nickname got a nickname. Despite nicknaming myself Panama Jackson (as a nod to my birthplace and one of the blackest last names ever, Jackson) people often call me “P,” “PJ,” or “Yo.” I guess it’s because my car ain’t got no roof. My car has a roof.

This begs the question: P, does every letter of the alphabet work as a nickname?

No. No it does not.

Word? Well then what letters work as a nickname?

I’m glad you asked.

Here is a letter-by-letter discussion of each letter and whether or not if successfully operates as a nickname. Because it’s Friday, and we ain’t got shit else to do.

A – I’m not a fan, it sounds like too much of an exclamation as opposed to a name but one of my boys does, in fact, go by A amongst family. I’ll allow it on a family technicality.

B – One of the more popular nickname letters. Always works. This one is especially functional in the Black community. Not sure why, but B just works out loud and Black folks like to live out loud.

C – Survey says, yes. Unless you’re a Crip, in which case, I’m guessing that you go by B? Maybe? I’m not in a gang, even if Eazy E tried to tell me that we were all in the same gang. As if. It does beg the question though: if I’m a Blood but my name is Chris, do I have to be Bhris? Can my nickname be shortened to C or does it automatically go to B? I checked Netflix, there’s no documentary about this and there’s a documentary about EVERYTHING on Netflix. Sidenote: I absolutely think “bouch” sounds better than “couch.” Shouts to Insecure.

D – Probably the most popular letter-specific nickname. I have zero proof on this, but I’d be there were more Black folks whose name starts with a D than any other letter. See also Detroit and peen. D just works. See what I did there?

E – Yep. Because it rhymes with B, C, and D. Sometimes it rhymes slow, sometimes it rhymes quick.

F – I frown upon this being a proper nickname, though I actually have an uncle named F. It’s not short for anything, it’s his name. We Black and southern. Sometimes one letter is all you got in the Jim Crow south. Still don’t like it as a nickname. It’s out. Bye, Felicia.

G – Absolutely. G works so well that it works with ADDITIONAL letters in every capacity as long as G comes last. AG through ZG. In an ironic twist of of Godly humor, XG, two letters who are killing this nickname game, do not sound good together even if it is allowable. They’re basically an Alicia Keys and John Legend mashup. Actually that doesn’t work because AK and JL sound like ass individually. Nehmind.

H – Nope. You may try. You will know. You have failed. I also have an uncle named H. Also not making that up.

I – Have you ever heard anybody say, “Yo, I!” No. You haven’t. Because it sounds dumb. It’s out.

J – Of course this works. It works like hot sex on a platter.

K – See “J.” JK Rowling kills the game, b.

L – Yep. You remember Lance from The Best Man? He was called “L, baby” by Q (which also works and is a popular nickname in the Black community). It works, it gets the job done.

M – This only works for Eminem. Otherwise, I think it’s a trash nickname. If Eminem never existed, it wouldn’t be acceptable at all. P has spoken.

N – See “M.” Don’t do it. Reconsider. Read some literature on the subject.

O – Works as a nickname and an exclamation in the same way that “A” doesn’t completely work. It’s in!

P – Totes obvs.

Q – As I said, it’s a popular one letter nickname in the Black community and the coolest, with the possible exception of X. Q just sounds like a cool cat. I’m not sure you can be shortened to Q if you’re not cool. Also, this is almost always the nickname for Quincy or Quinton and is ALWAYS the nickname for Quintavious, who may go by Tay if he’s Quintavious, Jr. and his father has already claimed Q. There are no QJs running around.

R – This only works if the world “The” is placed in front of it. Otherwise it just sounds ungood. It’s out.

S – Nope. Despite being one of the more popular letters in general, it just doesn’t sound awesome on its own. TS? DS? RS? Yep. S, by itself, not so much. Stick a fork in it, it’s done.

T – We all know several Ts. Do you know why? Because it works.

U – Naw. If it worked as a legit nickname, folks would call Usher “U” instead of “Ursh” or “Ursher.”

V – Definitely works. Because it just does. Though I’d imagine that if your name starts with a V, there’s probably a better nickname than V. Vi, Vinnie, Viv, Vince, etc. V works, but it should never be the go to.

W – Always shortened to Dub. If not, it doesn’t work because it has too many syllables, though it does gain points for being able to be turned into a hand signal, which nobody can see if you’re in a dark room. So yes and no, but more yes than no, because I said so.

X – Like Q, it is a cool ass nickname to have. Sounds like a drummer or a person who can wear sunglasses at night. It works.

Y – “Yo, Y.” Nope.

Z – I know a few folks that go by Z. And it’s always dope to say. So it’s in.

Therefore the following letters work, definitively:

A, B, C, D, E, G, J, K, L, O, P, Q, T, V, W, X, Z

You’re welcome. You suckas got served.

Panama Jackson

Panama Jackson is pretty fly (and gorgeous) for a light guy. He used to ship his frito to Tito in the District, but shipping prices increased so he moved there to save money. He refuses to eat cocaine chicken. When he's not saving humanity with his words or making music with his mouth, you can find him at your mama's mama's house drinking her fine liquors. Most importantly, he believes the children are our future. You can hit him on his hitter at panamadjackson@gmail.com.

  • BatmansExWife

    I go by “Q” because I hate going by Kiki since that’s not my name.

    SN: I was watching John Wick 2 last night, and I hate how when I tell people my name, then say, “Oh, like Keanu.” No.

  • HiddenCybFigure

    “B – One of the more popular nickname letters. Always works. This one is especially functional in the Black community. Not sure why, but B just works out loud and Black folks like to live out loud.”

    We have to live out loud because mediocrity is boring AF.

  • Kylroy

    “if I’m a Blood but my name is Chris, do I have to be Bhris?”

    Not that I see Bhris having a lot of interaction with the Jewish community, but if he did it could be awkward.

  • Val

    So, you’re sayin’ consonants generally work best as nicknames?

  • Michelle is my First Lady

    I usually tell folks to just call me “T” because I hate the way they butcher my name. Disney’s The Princess and the Frog made my name popular. So, there is no reason to get it all f*cked up now.

    • TheCollinB

      Did you get Ti-Ti comin up?

      • panamajackson

        Or Nana?

        • Michelle is my First Lady

          Usually Ti-Ti. My close friends and family call me Tia.

          • TheCollinB

            *throws myself in friends and family category*

        • TheCollinB

          Long A or short A? I feel like our generation woulda used the short, because Foxy Brown.

    • malaentuvida

      Maya Angelou made my name popular before I was born and people have been fudging it up for 30+ years

    • Diego Duarte

      Same. My name was so mispronounced and butchered until “Go, Diego Go!” came out.

      Now I’m forced to tell complete strangers to go fuck themselves on a daily basis.

      • Looking4Treble

        Just be happy that your last name isn’t Forrest. If I had a dollar for every time I heard “Run, Forrest, Run…” #NoImaginationHavingFools

        • Diego Duarte

          Ouch! This is how people become serial killers. I feel you.

      • RaeRae

        I feel your pain. Years ago people stayed singing “That’s So Raven” to me.

  • Kylroy

    Knew a guy in college who went by “Big N”. Dude was 6’11”, so he came by the first part honestly, but I’m chalking the insistence on his first initial up to White kid getting this nickname thing wrong.

    • Val

      “Big N”? For real?

      • panamajackson

        I laughed out loud.

        • miss t-lee

          Me too.

      • Kylroy

        Not lying. Only knew the guy for a few months when he was 19, praying he did not stick to this for long.

  • [Insert Creative Name Here]

    There are so many Ds in my family it’d just be easier to refer to them by their full name. But…where dey do dat at?

  • fedup

    See this what I love about thIs site. Sometimes you get articles about [seemingly] nothing that are so well written and thought out that its actually substantive.

    PJ, you should take this and put it on one of those little wallet cards, like the ones on the counter, by the register at hospital gift shop. That way, when people go in there to buy their “new mom” gifts (cause there is always at least one niqqa who was too busy to stop at Target first) they’ll see the list and buy it to add some bulk to that sad lil gift of one mylar balloon, and little clear box of blue or pink Jelly Belly’s. Parents get a lesson in nick-naming right off the bat, and you’ll forever have a monthly check comin in. It’s 2017, we gotta incorporate!

    • panamajackson

      I’ll make a call. And thank you for calling this substantive. lol

    • TheCollinB

      It’s a n*gga that read that last paragraph and got real sad somewhere.

  • KMN

    Or Q for Quazalarquien.
    I will never forget that child’s name…or her momma MARY for naming her that. The fuck you get Quazalarquien from fucking Mary. But I guess…

    • TheCollinB

      It sounds like I could mix that name with Sprite for a festive evening.

      • KMN

        ROFL that sounds like a drink that’ll put you on yourass lolol

      • Kylroy

        I’m going with Sci-Fi luchador myself.

      • Mr. Mooggyy

        Her name does sound like it has side effects!

        • Looking4Treble

          “Your name sounds like it has side effects.” *Stolen*.

    • Mr. Mooggyy
      • KMN

        But wait…she couldn’t even PRONOUNCE her name when I met her…she was like my name is Quasi…but lil girl how do you pronounce the rest of it lolol

    • miss t-lee

      I have a cousin who has a 15 letter first name, and what do we call her? T.

      • Kylroy

        You’re free to make a name as long as you want, but it *will* be shortened to two syllables max.

        • miss t-lee

          I mean…it was bound to happen. Then again, my family is big on nicknames. So rarely is anyone called by their given name.

      • KMN

        Like my daughter has two middle names and a hyphenated last name..i made SURE that she could spell and pronounce all of them (her first two names are Swahili and Yoruba and her middle name is Irish as heII…aka job application name if she needed it lmao)

        • miss t-lee

          Oh man.

          • KMN

            ROFL but the first three names are 5 letters each…the last name is a total of 12…she’s a Montessori baby so she got it lol

            • miss t-lee

              Hahaha.

    • BT

      Sounds like the name of an alien race in some Sci-Fi novel.

    • Sounds like something for “medicinal purposes “

  • TheCollinB

    List your nicknames through today:
    Zaster, Meece, C, CB, Lashes, and Hulk.

    • panamajackson

      Panama. Killa. D. Phyffe. Weezy. Petey Jakes. Empereezy. Panameezy.

      That’ll do pig.

      • Val

        Wasn’t there another nickname that used to be in your bio?

        • RaeRae

          Gorgeous P?

          • Val

            Maybe.

      • TheCollinB

        Petey Jakes was because you used to take your shirt of and swing it around your head like a helicopter as a youth minister?

        • panamajackson

          True story: Petey Jakes was actually my rap moniker when I was pursuing a recording career. I used to jokingly sign off as the good reverend pd jakes on emails, and just flipped it to Petey Jakes and was like…that name is flames. So from like 2004-2008, i was a rapper named Petey Jakes.

          • TheCollinB

            If it’s ok with you I’m gonna go with my origin story for the nickname.

            • panamajackson

              Bro. I BUSTED out laughing.

            • Jennifer

              LMAO! The shade.

      • NonyaB?

        You forgot PanaMayne

        -The People’s Bureau

    • I call most of my close female associates at work who are a little “thick”….Big Slim.
      They love it.
      I do not know why.

      • TheCollinB

        Yes you do.

        • Y’all are quick today with the comebacks, lol

    • BT

      De, Envy, Flash, Lambo…oh and back when And 1 was popular, my streetball name was M.C.I. cause every shot I took came from long distance.

      • TheCollinB

        Envy, Flash and Lambo are telling nicknames fam. They all sound like they had triple beams and Pyrex involved.

        • Kas loves Jamaican Breakfast

          You are killing the comment section today. I will just kick back and read in awe.

          • TheCollinB

            Makin up for lost time.

        • BT

          Big Meech was good to the youth…allegedly.

    • Trip, since my initials are HHH.

    • Val

      My nicknames have all been derivatives of my actual name. *shrug*

    • Michelle is my First Lady

      Let me try to answer this again:
      T, Tia, Ti-Ti, Chana, T1, Da-Da

      • TheCollinB

        Da-Da is short for Da-Da Damb?

        • Michelle is my First Lady

          I wish I knew where it came from. My father started calling me that out of the blue and somehow it just stuck.

          • TheCollinB

            +1 for dad nicknames
            I call my baby girl Biscuit and have no clue why. That’s just my little Biscuit.

            • Michelle is my First Lady

              I love that nickname! That’s adorable!

    • Wu or Wu young*
      Murray (my first name is Keith)
      Old man (nickname from elementary school)

      *Oddly enough my wife has never referred to me by most used nickname. I’m not a superhero at home just her husband.

      • TheCollinB

        Wive’s will front on you like that. It wasn’t until my wife knew I could throw her across a room* that she started calling me Hulk.

        *this was playing and not an issue of domestic violence.

    • PDL – Cape Girl Shero

      Cee, block, Colada

      • TheCollinB

        Colada is dope

        • PDL – Cape Girl Shero

          I like

        • Looking4Treble

          Agreed.

    • BatmansExWife

      Nana and Q.

    • Looking4Treble

      G, Garny, GT, G-Smooth, Hershey, Pear (only my oldest sister calls me that), G-Clef.

    • OG Mermaid

      A, AG, AW (ADub), Mermaid, Ri-Ri, Pumpkin, Velma (from scooby doo).

    • Jae Starz

      Jae, Chuck which was replaced with Bobby, Jac, Kweesha, Sharon (friend’s mom called me that because she thought that was my name)

    • Kas loves Jamaican Breakfast

      RJ, JR, and a great aunt who called me Blunderbuss until the day she died (so until I was 50)

      • Say what?

        • Kas loves Jamaican Breakfast

          blunderbuss
          1. a short-barreled large-bored gun with a flared muzzle, used at short range.
          2. an action or way of doing something regarded as lacking in subtlety and precision.

          • Please tell me none of these were the reason

            • Kas loves Jamaican Breakfast

              Kind of both. Not a bad kid, bit a busy inquisitive child.

          • fedup

            Oh, I LOVE that album. “Freedom at 21”, and the title track are actually my favs.

            What are yours?

        • It’s like a shotgun for pilgrims.

          • or people that time travel

          • Lmao@ u explaining.
            I know what it is.
            I just didn’t know why

            • Kas loves Jamaican Breakfast

              As a kid I was always into something – shotgun, just letting loose

      • TheCollinB

        You may be the first person in history to have a nickname and then the inverse of that nickname as a nickname. Which is some black shyt even tho black people don’t like math.

        • Kas loves Jamaican Breakfast

          I have an interesting last name.

          • TheCollinB

            Can we play hangman to guess?

            L?!

            • Kas loves Jamaican Breakfast

              It’s right there in my nickname

              • TheCollinB

                What is Rjblunderbussjr?!?!

                • Kas loves Jamaican Breakfast

                  Junior

                  • TheCollinB

                    So “Junior” is your last name? I feel like your last name is French adjacent. Like it has a fancy a s s “ç” in it somewhere.

                    • Kas loves Jamaican Breakfast

                      Nope. And yet to figure out the origin. However ive yet to meet anyone with that last name I wasn’t related to.

                    • TheCollinB

                      Is it Nabbie?

                    • Kas loves Jamaican Breakfast

                      Sorry. It is Junior. No it’s not French adjacent.

              • LindaLissen

                • Kas loves Jamaican Breakfast

                  Exactly. See, not even that hard. It’s down below by the way.

    • I once was kid named Yoda. The rest are basically short versions of my real name.

      • TheCollinB

        I had ears like Yoda when I was younger.

    • Cheech

      FC, Panama, Chi Chi, Rod-ree-gweez, Cheech, Thaddeus. And a number of derivatives of my government.

      • TheCollinB

        Thaddeus cause why?

        • Cheech

          It was high school. On the first day, I introduced myself to the girl in front of me in chemistry class. I was a sophomore new kid, she was a glamorous senior and the only black kid in class. I told her my name, she thought for a moment, and said, “That’s boring. Imma call you Thaddeus.” And she did.

          • TheCollinB

            Shooting your shot with the brown skin girl. Good work kid.

            • Cheech

              Her name was Mitzi.

              • TheCollinB

                How close did you get?

              • BrothasKeeper

                That name sounds……adventurous. Like she’d keep you out past your curfew just long enough for you to be scolded by your folks and at the same time become a high school legend/demigod.

                • Cheech

                  You’re not kidding.
                  She was tall, darker than Lupita, and the height of fashion. But also with these big librarian glasses, and a white knit auntie sweater she’d put on when it was cold.
                  She also looked good in a neoprene apron and goggles. (We were lab partners once.)

                  • BrothasKeeper

                    She sounds exquisite! You didn’t spot up just one time for at least an 18-footer?

                    • Cheech

                      I didn’t have that kind of confidence at 15. Not with a senior.

          • Kas loves Jamaican Breakfast

            Dayum son

    • IDareYou

      Boo Boo, Baby D, D. Now no one wants to call me by my last name at work so I sometimes go by B.

    • 44isnojoke

      Jay. AJ. JA. Pinkpanet*don’t ask!!!*

    • BrothasKeeper

      Mr. Brown, Señor Breezy, Uncle Wookiee.

    • HolymanSound –

      Super Gnat, Captian D, Monnie, Heavy D, Buffalo Bob, Bobby, Dalrymple, DEMO, Lone,
      Aaay Dadaaaay (the best one).

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