Dating, Relationships, & Sex, Theory & Essay

Ladies, What’s Up With the Late Night, Last Minute, When I’m Trying To Sleep, We Need A Resolution Convos?

Stop me if you’ve heard this one before.

Man and woman get into argument about something. It doesn’t matter what its about. It could be about Obama’s favorite Jordans. Or whether or not Season 3 of House of Cards was any good and advanced the cause of dismantling FEMA. Or an argument about Beyoncé and how she, not Stephen Hawking, has the best theory on black holes. Point is, they get into an argument about something. Maybe its important (black holes are very important) and maybe its not. Woman gets inside all of her feelings. You know Minnie Ripperton’s “Inside My Love”? Replace “love” with “feelings” and that’s the woman.  Because he can see inside her, he knows she’s pissed and attempts to talk about it in the moment to save the rest of the morning, afternoon, millenium. But she’s upset at man and decides she doesn’t feel like talking about it. A woman might got to have it…but this particular woman? She isn’t having it.

It’s like 7pm. There’s tension. There’s awkwardness. There’s walking on eggshells. Man knows that woman is going to pop at any moment. He ALSO knows that “any moment” means right as he’s about to go to sleep.

There isn’t a man alive who has dated a woman who doesn’t know this life. If you get into an argument, or even a spirited debate with a woman who does not appreciate your opinion OR who just so happens to feel strongly about something that was said, even twelve hours previuosly, you are going to hear about it between the hours of 11pm and 2am. Just as you lay your head down and begin to lull yourself to sleep to thoughts of new Kendrick Lamar albums and racial harmony either the phone will ring (and continue to ring until you answer it) or you’ll hear from the other side of the bed, “are you awake? I can’t sleep.”

“Are you awake? I can’t sleep.” is woman code for “we’re about to have a conversation right now and I don’t care if you’re tired, sleep, and have to be up in a few hours.”

I’ve never quite understood how this became a thing. But its consistent as fuck. I’ve always wondered if there was some woman class that happened in the middle of some game that all men were watching – like a midseason NBA Clevelend Cavaliers versus Golden State Warriors game – that we’re oblivious to where this gets discussed as being essential to the woman experience. But it never fails, if a woman is upset about something she will NOT be ready to discuss it until the man is ready to go to sleep AND she is likely to not understand (read give any fucks) that he is nonplussed at her chosen time for discussion.

I have a theory on this.

Here is my theory on this.

Women do not like to be inconvenienced. I mean nobody really does, but women, especially, do no like being inconvenienced by anybody. But especially not by their man.

This is universal truth. Do not attempt to undo this truth for it is truth. And truth cannot be undone. Veritas. An inconvenienced woman – a being that all men come across at some point during the tenure of any relationship – is one who both needs you to know that she’s inconvenienced (and I’m using inconvenienced in a very liberal sense, just because you feel that way doesn’t make it so and conversely because you don’t feel inconveniencd doesn’t make it so) and needs you to also be. In my travels I’ve learned that disagreements with women count as inconveniences. And I mean ANY disagreements.

Women are emotional justice seekers. This is not a bad thing. In fact it makes some sense. It is the crux of the “woman scorned” action statement which is: If you scorn me, I will kill us all, I don’t even care. Granted, that’s extreme. On a smaller scale, say a relationship spat or disagreement, the emotional justice manifests itself differently in the form of seeking out retribution for robbing her of her emotional peace that existed before the conversation arose that created the emotional baseball bat with which she was bludgeoned. Which I think we can all agree, is inconvenient.

It’s only NOT an inconvenience if she goes off by herself and determines that perhaps you were right, in which case you’ll just never hear about it again. BUT, if she DOES happen to feel inconvenienced or as poet laureate Rich Homie Quan inveighed, feels some type of way, then you will hear about it again because she needs you to know that you inconvenienced her emotions. And the best time to let somebody know that you felt inconvenienced…

…is at an inconvenient hour. It’s not enough to tell you, she must show you. It’s happened to be me before. I’m sure it will happen again. I’ve heard many women talk about not wanting to go to bed mad. This is dumb. Because you don’t have to. Generally speaking, most men don’t like it when they’re beefing with their women so they do attempt in some fashion to fix the problem. And because we like our sleep, we’re not trying to wait until sleepy time to make this happen.

Also, I know many women who state that they don’t stay mad long. So by the time we have to talk about it in the witching hour, she’s not even mad anymore, she just wants to talk about her feelings. Which I can understand, by why does that have to wait til late. Do women not like sleep as much as men? These things keep me up at night, ya know, when it’s not my woman keeping me up at night. I’m up at night a lot.

But I truly want to know, from a woman’s perspective what that’s really about. I have my theory – I outlined it – but it’s a theory from the mind of a man. All woman know exactly what I’m talking about.

So what’s that about? Ladies, why do you all wait until we’re about to go to sleep to decide THAT is when a a situation must be resolved?

Panama Jackson

Panama Jackson is pretty fly (and gorgeous) for a light guy. He used to ship his frito to Tito in the District, but shipping prices increased so he moved there to save money. He refuses to eat cocaine chicken. When he's not saving humanity with his words or making music with his mouth, you can find him at your mama's mama's house drinking her fine liquors. Most importantly, he believes the children are our future. You can hit him on his hitter at panamadjackson@gmail.com.

  • Charlisia Nwachukwu

    First thought was about this “Or whether or not Season 3 of House of Cards was any good” … It really wasn’t.

    Second thought was .. you are so right. I hate going to bed angry.. I would rather just fix it before it moves into the next day and pillow talk.. when both parties have had a sec to think about it is the best time. we talk.. we feel good.. we cuddle… then I can wake up and make us pancakes with love.

  • Pinks

    I’ve got nothing. I’m the woman who would rather have some time to stew in my feelings before I interrupt my good slumber with some nonsense. I am SERIOUS bout my sleep, so bringing up/rehashing an issue at that time is asinine and dangerous in my world. Let that ish wait until morning or just keep it to yourself permanently because you won’t get a good response from me.

    I’m also not a “we need to talk” kinda girl. I just can’t deal with long, drawn-out conversations about feelings and ish like that. I just be shrugging my shoulders like “For real, bruh? That’s wild.”

    • KMN

      yes do not effs with my sleep…you could’ve killed my cat…we’ll talk about Lady in the morning…im sleep…ill deal with you AFTER slumber son…

      • Pinks

        And by morning, I might be like, yea that heffa needed to go anyway, lol

        I’ve gone to bed with stuff on my mind plenty of times, woken up and been like “It wasn’t even that serious.” So I let it go. In that moment, sometimes I might be feeling too volatile to bring it up, so I’ll spare us both the heavy breathing and hold it in while I decide if it needs a discussion or not.

        • AlwaysCC

          my friend told me about the 7s rule (i’ve heard variations of the number)…will it affect your life for the next 7 minutes, 7 months, or 7 years. 7 minutes – let it go…7 months or years get appropriate anger levels, but more importantly get talked about on how to resolve/fix the issue.

          • HeyBooHey

            Sounds like a good rule to adopt, may need to use this in the future when negros starting negroing

            • KMN

              “when negros start negroing”…
              I will be using this from now own…i’ll make sure to FIND ways to use this in everyday events…
              “Who brought the potato salad?” “Cousin Willie May…but you don’t want that because when negros start negroing…”
              Yep…i think this will be my quote for 2015

              • HeyBooHey

                Feel free! Switch it around sometimes, make it apart of your vocabulary

                “Wait, Junebug got caught busting out the bando? That’s what happens when negroes be negroing”. “He can’t help it, that negro gon negro”

              • Lea Thrace

                Ninjas gonna ninj is my variation on that one.

            • AlwaysCC

              don’t get me wrong, we go to bed angry ALL the time lol i’m just usually over it the next morning (like pink said) lol

              • Epsilonicus

                Exactly. Most of the time I wake up and its just not that important

              • HeyBooHey

                Lol I gotta learn when to let things go for next time so I don’t lose more sleep like I did before

            • Pinks

              Nigs gon nig.

              • HeyBooHey

                There’s a haitian variation that I can’t even try to write out. Get into that one too lol

                • Pinks

                  wap con george!!!

                  I just say that when somebody ticks me off

                  • HeyBooHey

                    YES!!!!!! LMAO

          • Pinks

            I’ve never heard of that…that’s a good one.

            Methinks I can apply it to parenting as well. The man has very little patience and goes from 0 to a hunnit on our kid often. I’m like look, he’s 4..he’s going to do stupid stuff. If it’s not going to kill him immediately or doesn’t show signs he’s a psychopath, let it rock and stop stressing yourself.

            • AlwaysCC

              i need to practice it with my kids, too lol it’s not helping that i gave up alcohol for lent

              • Pinks

                It’s hard, cus it sometimes feels like they’re purposely doing stupid stuff. The boy stepped on his draw this morning, causing his piggy bank to break and everything to fall down on top of him. I ran in there thinking he was hurt, looking for missing teeth, and he was more scared that we were mad.

                He was OK, but the dude made a point to mention again and again that he’s told him not to pull on the drawers. He brought it up again at breakfast, like you need to think of why that wasn’t OK yadda yadda…like bruh, let it go!

                • DiamondIsMyRealName

                  I think there are a lot of men who expect our young boys to fully understand the extent of said “incidents and accidents” as if they’re older than they are. Yes, I’m sure lil man knows he probably shouldnt pull the drawers but he probably didnt understand the consequence couldve been a tv, on his head, until he actually did it. I have this talk often with sons father… let the youngin live a little sometimes, #ButDidHeDieDoe?

                  • Pinks

                    OMG yes!! Our son is smart as a whip and more mature than some others we’ve seen his age, but he’s still freaking 4 years old. His father thinks he’s supposed to speak to him once and stuff will forever be in his brain, but I’m like, yo, it doesn’t work like that. At 4 I’m sure you were hardheaded as f**k too – and in your case, your parents beat you for it. He seems to think I’m being the mom who’s too soft, but I think I have a bigger capacity for patience and he needs to just cool out sometimes. He’s been trying to woosah and not fly off the handle as quickly.

                    • DiamondIsMyRealName

                      Trust me I understand your struggle… My son is 5 and we have the same “issues, not issues” because I can appreciate my son being an innocent 5 yr old and not corrupted by media and other grown asz kids who need to be punched in the throat, but i digress… I just think as men, they want to see their sons in their image and it’s hard for them to understand that the molding of such takes time… much more than 4-5 years. They shall see the fruits of their labor soon enough though. Happy parenting! :)

                    • Pinks

                      Them other kids, though? what about when they’re family?

                      I be wanting to do SO MUCH thote-punching.

                    • DiamondIsMyRealName

                      My nephews already know… I will jack they aszes all up and down they mama stairs! Dont play wit me lil boy!

                    • Pinks

                      These kids ain’t from my brother’s loins, so I leave my discipline out of the physical realm, but plenty a time I’d like to grab them by the collar and fling in a corner.

                    • DiamondIsMyRealName

                      Ha! These came from my sissy poohs womb and let me tell you, she was a demon child and her offspring, well lets just say they surely belong to her and get it honest. I dont have time, cant let that sickness rub off on whats mine! lol

                • MansaMusa

                  This is me. I’m like…”….I JUST told her….”

              • Cleojonz

                See, you messed up. You should have been more specific like brown liquor or red wine only lol.

                • AlwaysCC

                  that’s what everyone keeps telling me lol

        • Amber

          I’m the same way. I rarely address issues in the moment. I consider my self a slow processor, i need some time to think things thru. So yeah I’m going to sleep. It may be a couple days before i bring up something cause i want to make sure it’s really an issue or me just being in my feelings.

        • KMN

          I might hold it in…i’m a virgo and we’re petty and hold on to unnecessary ish by nature lmao…but i refuse to let anything mess with me and my sleep…
          But i agree with you…a good night’s sleep will help you realize whether it’s worth the fight or not

          • Pinks

            My Virgo sistren! I stay getting mad over some picky nonsense..and then I check myself and be like Pinks, if you don’t get yo ole…

            Or I may do some passive-aggressive ish like slam the toilet seat down while the bedroom door is open so he can hear it. I’m NOT talking about that 5hit anymore. Either you do it, or deal with my petty lmao

          • Tx10inch

            I might hold it in…i’m a virgo and we’re petty and hold on to unnecessary ish by nature.

            Virgo’s. Ugh.

            • Lea Thrace

              Back off homie. Dont come for Virgos. You DO NOT WANT THIS!

              • camilleblu

                he don’t want na’an bit of it

              • Tx10inch

                You right. I sholl don’t!

              • KMN

                Preach…i swear fo GOD my sprem donor mad me mad one day…and i held on to that ish…for two days. i found him. i tried to run him over with my Olds Delta 98…I was almost successful. Then i realized i was too cute for jail.
                Do.Not.Cross.Virgos.Ever.Son.

                Because Virgos gone Virgo

                • Tx10inch

                  Petty Betty, you may need a hug…and anger management.

                  • KMN

                    LMAO…i DIDN”T hit him though…but don’t blame me for sleeping with someone else when i see your a$$ coming out of some other woman’s house…
                    That was called constraint on my part…he’s lucky

            • camilleblu

              Leo’s. Ugh.

              there..fixed that for you

              • Tx10inch

                We’re awesome.

                • camilleblu

                  lol…whatever niqqa..

                • Sigma_Since 93

                  eeeh No. Too many of y’all dominate my household.

                • PhlyyPhree

                  or nah. I
                  Unless awesome means batsh!t crazy. Then yes.

              • mssporadic

                Don’t mess with Leos either! We are worse than Virgos.

                • Mr. SD

                  weedabest!

              • Mr. SD

                #Leos

            • Pinks

              YOU DON’T WANT THIS VIRGO WORK, PATNAH!

              • Tx10inch

                Correct. You are correct Petty LaBelle.

                • Pinks

                  Aka Queen Mother Petty Shabazz

              • Kema

                *throws up Virgo gang signs*

    • panamajackson

      I really want to believe you.

      • Pinks

        You can email my husband person for confirmation LOL

        I am non-confrontational, sometimes passive aggressive, and a person who will hold onto some anger for weeks before you even know what the cause is. I also can’t control my facial expressions to save my life, so if something’s wrong, he’ll notice and maybe try to coax it out of me. I just say “I’m good” or “we’ll talk later.” Later DOES NOT mean before bed, cus sleep = LIFE

    • Careful she bites

      are we sisters? i will give a hard silence (like days of silence) to get ish right in my head. if i talk to you about whatever bulljangle caused an argument, then I’M gonna be up all night. I. DON’T. WANT. TO. BE. UP. ALL. NIGHT. shid, i’ma sleep. you gonna sleep. then when we decide (if we decide) to chat this thing up we’re both well rested and rational.

    • Cleojonz

      This is me too. I swear alot of times I feel like I should have been born a dude. It’s like please just stop talking. Too many words.

  • mochazina

    cuz. ya’ll can sleep on feelings. we can’t. it’s woman. *shrugs*

    • panamajackson

      Well according to one of them womans upthread, its possible to do. Which makes it a choice. SECURITY!

      • mochazina

        LOL – you cain’t call security on us – you’ll have to have another convo about that. :-D

      • Lea Thrace

        So finally we have proof that womanhood is not some homogeneous monolith. Whoda thunk it?

        • panamajackson

          you are all one.

        • Pinks

          You ain’t know we ALLLLLLL think the same, without fail?

        • miss t-lee

          OKAY?

        • mochazina

          right, cuz even those of us who like to talk might have various reasons for why it gotta be at midnight-thirty. lol

          • panamajackson

            crazy right? which is why i asked the question as to why. so all of you could drop reasons. we know that it happens. so i asked for why.

            • mochazina

              gotta ask *your* woman. cuz relationship.

  • Its crazy how petty (and crazy) a woman will get to get the last word, get closure, resolve an issue. At that point its the principality; they care more about them not getting the floor than the issue itself. Enter someone like me who abhors confrontation, and well, the struggle is real. Best plan of action is to donwhat John Madden taught us all, just win baby. Nothing will shut a woman down than actually losing said argument.

    • Nicholas Peters

      You just have to know how to argue with women…

    • HeyBooHey

      Why we gotta be petty though Tristan?!?

      • Why you gotta call 16 times cuz i stopped texting u back

        • HeyBooHey

          That’s cuz you mess with young girls. A grown woman just ignores you when you finally get your actright reactivated

          • camilleblu

            yeah, i’m like 16 times #doe????

          • 30somethings included. Also ignore me ill forget you.

            • HeyBooHey

              That’s the point depending on the situation. But I’m not calling you 16 damn times, regardless of unlimited minutes. When your chakras align to hit me back, hit me back.

              • miss t-lee

                Ain’t all that much calling in the world.

                • HeyBooHey

                  Or the universe smh. You get 2 tops depending on the situation, then I’m going about my day

                  • miss t-lee

                    Amen.
                    And I’m not even leaving a message. You gone get this work, live and direct.

                    • HeyBooHey

                      Message?!? These missed calls better be all the message he needs. Live and direct indeed lol

                    • miss t-lee

                      Exactly.

          • panamajackson

            yeah. this just isnt true. most women’s response is that we deal with the wrong women. except every woman is the wrong woman except the woman talking at that moment.

            • Epsilonicus

              Church

            • Young ninja preach

            • HeyBooHey

              That’s cuz honestly, sometimes yall do deal with the wrong woman! You can’t call somebody crazy and refuse the hint of needing to find your chill. I’m not calling nobody more than 2x unless it’s my momma or Jesus on the mainline.

            • MsSula

              I will call my husband 15-11 times if I need him right now and he ain’t picking up! He is my friggin’ next of kin, so he better be answering his phone!

              • afronica

                If I call you more than twice in a row, someone is chasing me with a gun, and I think you can help for whatever reason. If it’s any worse (whoever caught me, shot me and I’m in the back of an ambulance heading to the hospital), I’m either in too much pain to talk or I’m unconscious and can’t speak by definition.

                I’ve been on the receiving end of the 12 calls in a row. It’s a power play, plain and simple. Sexes of the caller don’t factor in really.

            • Tx10inch

              Tabernacle.

        • Rachmo

          I’m calling you twice and then I’m giving up and getting drunk.

          • camilleblu

            i mean…my block hand is skrong in deez streets…i will block a nicca so quick

            • Rachmo

              Don’t get it twisted I’m going to be deeeeeeeeeeeeep in my feelings and have a gf wrestle the phone out of my inebriated hands to not leave a completely insane message. But I am going to drop it after calling twice

            • K Lust

              Amen

          • HeyBooHey

            This. Yes.

        • Lea Thrace

          I am more likely to deny your entire existence as it pertains to my life than go through all that calling bs. I wasnt about that life in middle school so what makes you think I’m pulling that PS when I’m a grown woman.

        • Did you stop texting her back out of spite or because you were busy? If it was the former, you were contributing to the pettiness.

          Granted, calling a person who obviously doesn’t want to talk to you 16 times is the definition of insanity.

          • I can always find a way to be busy when im over a conversation

        • Ms. Bridget

          16 times? When does your pride tell you to “put the phone down”?!?

    • Al Davis not Madden.

  • Tx10inch

    I have learned that women channel Malcolm X when there soul is disturbed. You WILL hear their feelings by any.means.necessary. Text, email, phone call, late night wake up or possibly video. (I’m serious) You can not stop it. It is relationship destiny.

    • Nicholas Peters

      Snapchat?

      • Tx10inch

        Possibly. Don’t give em any more ideas tho.

    • HeyBooHey

      Not Malcolm X, maybe Martin Luther the King. You gon get this speech before you have any dreams.

      • Tx10inch

        Lmao.

      • panamajackson

        This is was funny. I will upvote it for that reason.

    • MsSula

      I am a talker. I talk things through. I find breakthroughs while talking. I like to express. I am a classic extrovert. So yeah, you are going to hear about my feelings whether you are inconvenienced or not. What I will do is give you the choice to pick a time when you would like to talk about it.

      The Hubster is a classic introvert. He has to think about things in his head before speaking. Yeah that didn’t really go over too well in the beginning.

      We have found somewhat of a middle ground (when we actually want to resolve things). If something irritates me, I tell him I have to talk to him and he should let me know when he is available for it. It allows me to calm down and get my point across more clearly. And it allows him to get his mind right for a long, drawn out conversation. Win/Win and everybody can sleep when they want. Loll.

      • Tx10inch

        Trust me. I’m very aware of your type. It’s probably the best way to do things in all honesty.

      • Wild Cougar

        this is me. Words are air to me. If you don’t want to listen, pack your bags cuz we not gon work out.

  • miss t-lee

    I’m Chappelle show Rick James to your sleep’s couch.

    • Mika

      LMAO

      • Cleojonz

        Audible chuckle!

  • Mika

    ahhhhhhhhhhh, yea. I just want to call things on the spot as they are; might cause me to say things without thinking but I really like my sleep.

  • Pinks

    I must’ve been born with the wrong reproductive organs, then, cus I most certainly CAN go to sleep disappointed, upset, angry, whatever.

    Stay on your side of the bed, don’t touch me, and I can sleep like a baby while thinking you ain’t isht and I want to kick you in the forehead. The next morning I may still be salty, and I’m OK with that.

    • Detroit Skater

      YES!

    • miss t-lee

      Yeah nah. No can do.

      • Pinks

        That’s always been me. The man is the opposite – he’s definitely more emotive than I am.

        At my homegirl’s bridal shower, I wrote on the advice card “Don’t listen to that ‘don’t go to sleep mad bull*5hit. sometimes you need time to think ish over and come back with a clearer head.'”

        • miss t-lee

          I’m not going to sleep mad, because i’m not going to sleep…lol
          Neither is he.

          • HeyBooHey

            You’re me lol. I’m the same way, can’t go to sleep mad

            • miss t-lee

              *daps*

          • panamajackson

            This is evil.

          • Sigma_Since 93

            Some Monday morning corner love for ya!

            Hateful azz…………………

            • miss t-lee

              I’ve been called worse, by better people.
              *smizes*

              • camilleblu

                lol

              • Sigma_Since 93

                Better….. I’m the best person you’ve never met!!!!! lol!

                • miss t-lee

                  Calm down there, killer.

                  • Sigma_Since 93

                    I’m a sleeper not a killer.

        • That don’t “go to sleep mad” swindle will have everyone in the house messed up.

          • Epsilonicus

            Yup

          • Pinks

            I agree. Sometimes speaking right in the moment is a terrible idea.

            • It usually leads to someone having oral diarrhea.

              • Pinks

                I’ll be bringing up some ole irrelevant stuff, weakening my point by the second lol

                I’ve learned to choose my battles wisely.

                • and that irrelevant ish will only serve to make me more mad since I’m being inconvenienced so I’ll to fight the urge to go all William Sherman.

                  • MansaMusa

                    When they are keeping you up and doubly wrong, AND triply wrong by pulling up old shit, its time to burn and salt the fields, son.

                • Tx10inch

                  • HeyBooHey

                    This happens. Don’t try to understand it and nobody said it was right lol

              • HeyBooHey

                Having lived that life before, I approve this message smh

  • It’s just asymmetric warfare. Don’t fight your enemy when they’re comfortable. I hate it though.

  • Nicholas Peters

    That ain’t even the worst…the worst is the pre-smash session question…. “I’m Ready to Go” …I have begun taking care of you…all I need for you to do is let me finish the job…

    Then your hand slides where I should be sliding and you speak what has to be one of the worst words in the English language, “Wait…”

    I’m excited, vulnerable, malleable, and this is the time you decide to have relationship altering discussions…Pure Evil…

    Also, can I ask women a question…how come we outweigh you by like 100 pounds and are 5-6 inches taller…but when yall sleep you go spread eagle and take over 70% of the bed..while our big @sses are in the corner hanging on for dear life?

    • For real, be hanging off the bed one foot on the ground like Shawn Michaels in the royal rumble

    • Pinks

      That’s petty as all hell; who ARE these women y’all are entertaining?

    • Rachmo

      Bc I like to stretch out and need all of the covers :-)

      • Nicholas Peters

        But if I fall off the bed..I’m waking you up (I don’t care about the time) and we are going to have a conversation

        • Rachmo

          And I am turning over and wrapping myself up in all the blankets and going back to sleep. I need my beauty rest.

          • Nicholas Peters

            Then you getting woke up again…if you need to be warm you can wrap yourself in me

      • You is skinny. You don’t need all that room.

        • Epsilonicus

          Small &ss taking up all the space

        • Rachmo

          Bruh I swear once a week my bf says that exact phrase to me. He’s so lost as to how he wakes up every morning shivering in a corner. But I guess that’s part of the pain of dating me. No one’s perfect :)

    • panamajackson

      You’ll never get a good answer to that question. It’s right up there with, how come you pack your clothes to stay at my house but end up wearing all my clothes and taking them with you?

      • Nicholas Peters

        and then leave some of your close @ my house…but when you come back over…you never wear the clothes you left

    • MsSula

      “Also, can I ask women a question…how come we outweigh you by like 100 pounds and are 5-6 inches taller…but when yall sleep you go spread eagle and take over 70% of the bed..while our big @sses are in the corner hanging on for dear life?”

      I beg to differ. In my household, I fight for dear life trying to hold on to the little piece of sheet I can hang on to to not be thrown out of bed!
      Ninja be all over the bed talmbout “I am trying to find your warmth”. Negro! If you didn’t keep the temperature in the bedroom below freezing, you wouldn’t need my or anybody’s warmth. *smh* and side eye of epic proportions.

      • Epsilonicus

        “I am trying to find your warmth”

        That line means something completely different in my house ;-)

    • afronica

      Your first three paragraphs = you are chexing a terrorist. No always means no, but if someone decides to have deep relationship talk mid-chex, she’s taken lessons from ISIL/ISIS/Daesh. If it happens once, that’s on her. If it happens more than once, your beheading is your problem.

      And before you say that I’m just blaming the guy, if someone shows you they’re crazy, the appropriate response is to run, not to spout PUA rhetoric.

      • That first paragraph is so true. That’s why I don’t negotiate with terrorists.

        • afronica

          But Todd, you seem to interpret a wide gamut of things as terrorism. Chexing sans socks, for example.

          • What do you mean by that? Maybe I ask too much of women? And I have had $ex without socks before!

            • afronica

              J/k, Monsiuer Never Nude.

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