Lists, Theory & Essay

Ladies, We Need Answers

"Like I said, the answer is 'the cookie'. Wait, what was the question? Oh. Doesn't matter, protect your cookie. From Cookie Monster. He blue."

One of the great things about VSB is that its  a forum for a lot of women to gain insight into what men think. And not just The Champ and myself, but the various brohams that venture here and offer perspectives on any and everything under the sun, from pulpit pimpin’ to sweater puppy management. We generally go in like two gay guys at a Prince concert with Drake as the opener.

Because of this, we get a lot of questions seeking advice, guidance, and help with various situations from women. This makes sense and we’re always glad to oblige seeing as our goal is to reduce crime in the world. But you know what? We have questions at times too. While we may have a very good idea about most things, there’s nothing like hearing an answer from the horses mouth. Which is actually why ninety percent of all relationship advice starts and ends with: maybe you should talk to your boyfriend or girlfriend.

Most smart enough people with common sense and even a minute ability to observe their surroundings should be able to answer most relationship related questions but you just never know really. With that said, we spend so much time hearing from us and about why we think everything is such and such, I figured today, I’d query our wonderful community about a few questions that a lot of men would have if we ever thought to ask questions.

Also, I’m sure I could find answers to a lot of these by going to a website run by a woman who writes about relationships, but real talk, when your commenters give good community, why leave home? So here are some questions that I’d like to know the answers too lady.

1. Why do women get so upset when exes reach out shortly after a break to see how you all are doing?

I had a convo with a homegirl about this one today and she basically asked me, “what’s the point?” Unless dude is calling to say he made a mistake there’s no reason to call and interrupt her healing and attempting to get over the dude. As a guy, a lot of guys do just call to see how y’all are doing. It has no greater point. Which could be the problem. I don’t know. I got one hangin’ and two swangin’.

2. Do women really not like it when their man is having a lot of fun without her?

Kevin Hart said this in his Seriously Funny special. And I tend to think its true. But maybe I’m wrong. I’ve always suspected that women hated it when their man was out having a ball, in like Vegas or something where as men are constantly pushing their women to go have fun with their girls and stuff. We want you to get out without us and it seems like many women never do. My experience has shown me that women go into killjoy mode. Any truth there ladies?

3. Is there anything universally that a man can do that will make a woman instantly breakup with him?

Seems like women will attempt to work out any and everything. Not that it will be smooth sailing but cheating can be worked out. Murder can be worked out. Finding out your woman cheated on you is nearly universally grounds for a breakup amongst men. Just like throwing a skillet at my mother’s head. That will get you shorted. I’m curious.

4. Speaking of working things out, do women always think its the man who’s not working hard enough to fix the problems?

Most of us menfolks tend to think that women severely lack in the accountability department. Are we wrong? Do women realize when they’re f*cking up but just don’t like to let us know?

5. Why exactly do women ask questions like “you want to hit me?” after doing something that would obviously be worthy of a beat down? Like, why even ask that question?

I’m baffled by this.

6. Do women ever get over hating an ex that dumped her to the point that she doesn’t actively wish ill will up on him?

Seems like women tend to hold on to significant exes in such a way that they want them to suffer for not realizing how great they were. Thing is, men maybe don’t deal with our issues very well, but we pretty much let y’all arses go. Or so it seems.

Ladies, the floor is yours. Help us out. Like Anthony Hamilton so poignantly said, “why?”

Fellas, let’s get all of our questions out there. What do you want to ask the boobed massive of VSB?

Talk to me.

-VSB P aka THE ARSONIST aka TANGLE JIG P aka GIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIRL HE A 3

To make wedding invitations at home....

Damon Young

Panama Jackson is pretty fly for a light guy. He used to ship his frito to Tito in the District, but shipping prices increased so he moved there to save money. When he's not saving humanity with his words or making music with his mouth, you can find him at your mama's mama's house drinking her fine liquors. Most importantly, he believes the children are our future.

  • http://twitter.com/Brklyn2Chi Brklyn2Chi

    Don’t call it a comeback, I been here for years.

    Maybe it just me…

    • http://pinchmycheekie.wordpress.com Cheekie

      Look at you coming back strong. :)

      • http://twitter.com/#!/Brklyn2Chi Brklyn2Chi

        @ Cheekie- Im been reading again daily probably since Dec., but have been waiting to make my “triumphant” comeback and needless to say it feels Great (tony the tiger voice)

        Set up:
        Meet this young lady out, and we’re vibing for most of the evening, then it comes time for me to make my exit. So I say hey why dont we exchange numbers and get together sometime, ya know nothing to heavy.

        And now to my one and only question:

        So to that VSS: Whats the word?

        • Tes

          Okay, this is going to sound really weird, but I have a small trick for situations like that. In the begining of the conversation, I’ll tell them my name once, maybe twice. When he asks for my number after all this time vibing, he has to remember my name, or he gets no number.
          So essentially, it would all depend on you and your level of interest.

        • http://www.pinchmycheekie.wordpress.com Cheekie

          *eyebrow raise at who you “may” be referring to* ;)

  • http://kineticculture.com NubianEmpress

    Yeah, we don’t want yall to have fun…STAY YOUR AS*ES AT HOME! lol. i kid.

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

      suuuuuuuuuure you kid. lol

  • macdw

    I can’t answer all of your questions, but I will tell you this. Many of my exes don’t even get a second thought from me, but the brothas who flat out lied….dropped the “L” and then dropped out…I have nothing but hate for them. I do wish them ill and I always will. It is ok to get bored…change your mind…move on….but it is not cool to hurt people.

    The only thing that would make me break up instantly without even trying to work it out is blatant disrespect. I understand anger, but there are certain things you just shouldn’t say to me. If you do, then I know you don’t respect me. Without respect the rest is useless…why bother? I’m out. As for that other stuff…I can’t help you. Good luck.

    • D’Lady

      I totally agree with you. When a guy strings you along and through the course of the relationship expresses verbal/physical affection only to end up breaking your heart is cause for some serious loathing. A lot of guys say they don’t intentionally hurt girls but I’m not entirely sure about that. Deception leads to a lot of hurt and can result in a lot of angry women who feel used and manipulated.

      • Yeah*yeah*Yeah

        “A lot of guys say they don’t intentionally hurt girls but I’m not entirely sure about that. Deception leads to a lot of hurt and can result in a lot of angry women who feel used and manipulated.”

        Ah-greed!

      • sweetnessTO

        Not to mention all the guys that KNOW they aren’t feeling you the same way you’re feeling them… but they fake it, and string you along, and lie… sometimes for years, then just end it. I don’t care if you’re male or female… if you know the person you are dating is madly in love (and planning the rest of your lives) and you’re just “meh” on the whole thing… then you should be the bigger and mentally stronger person… and considerately and thoughtfully end it. This is how you avoid stalkers… and major resentment.

        • macdw

          I was sitting at the breakfast table one morning picking out stationary for wedding invitations with a man. He looked up over his blue berry pancakes and just started shaking his head. He got up from the table and said ” I’m sorry. I just can’t settle for you.” and he walked out. Now, again…I don’t fault the brotha for not wanting to spend the rest of his life with me…be he could have come to that conclusion before he gave me a ring and started planning the guest list. That is just plain shady. I’m just sayin….

          • CNotes

            @macdw

            Wow! This story breaks my heart (really).

          • WIP

            Incredible. And I totally see your point. You can deal with rejection, but at that point you probably had to disclose that heartache to dozens of people and face their judgement too. Men pick the worst times to be honest.

          • Yeah…So

            I’m sorry… that really sucks.

          • keisha brown

            *jaw on ground
            that. is. so sad.

            PSA for fellas: we want/need truth..but how you deliver it MATTERS.

            • http://www.verysmartbrothas.com Symbiotic Loner

              The next time you argue with your man, remember what you just said and exercise some common courtesy…

              • http://emdottie.com EmDottie

                Touche.

          • lil grad student

            wow, this hurts me

          • DynamicOne

            Seems like we were dating twins/cousins/some sort of relative because my ex got that same memo on “Things to do to that warrant eternal hatred”. But I’ll do you one better, because I experienced the same story. Except after he leaves, you find out the next that you are pregnant after you were rushed to the emergency room. Then your relatives call trifling negro and he says, “that it aint my problem….she’s lying.” Actions like that warrant lifetime, no the eternal death stares etc etc. I shall tease him water from heaven…hahahah*evil cackle*

        • Hawaii

          THIS.
          Oh, how this comment resonates w/ me.

        • Burnest Griffin IV

          Yeah but sometimes when a brotha tries to step up, admit the differences in adoration between the two parties, and tries to let the other down softly, said other gets upset that there was a difference in the first place. I don’t become enamored easily so I’m too worried about hurting someone’s feelings to even get into relationships these days (because my feelings aren’t in danger). And then when I do finally find myself in a relationship, the person is usually really into me (frighteningly so) to the point where I feel trapped and kinda bad for not feeling as strongly. It seems like people fall in love too easily these days.

      • CAsweeface

        Co-Sign,Co-Sign, Co-Sign! This is the situation that supposedly makes women “crazy” when someone’s blatant disrespect directly effects our feelings and life for that matter. Rat Bastards!

    • http://twitter.com/SmartFoxGirl SmartFoxGirl

      Yes, constant disrespect is enough to make most women leave. I can’t be with someone who doesn’t love me and respect me.

      • http://www.verysmartbrothas.com Symbiotic Loner

        Constant disrespect is enough to make some men leave, too. No man want to be with a female who doesn’t love him and DEFINITELY who doesn’t respect him. DOUBLE those two statements for men like me…

      • http://emdottie.com EmDottie

        Disrespect/violence. I had a friend whose boyfriend hit her. She’s doing fine now… Him, not so much… Thanks to her older brother and cousins…

        • http://www.verysmartbrothas.com Symbiotic Loner

          You’ve missed my point ENTIRELY… But, since you went there… What about the man whose “woman” hits HIM? Should HE call his boys to wreck HER up? Moving on…

  • Deeloveli

    I’m mad beyond words at that pic. And that caption. I can hear Steve Harvey’s ignant @ss as I read the words. Good show.

    • tgtaggie

      I think I saw Steve on the previews for Dr. Phil this week. And Steve eerily looks like a black doppelganger of Dr. Phil. Same mustache and all. lol.

      • http://iamyourpeople.com/ I Am Your People

        I think I saw Steve on the previews for Dr. Phil this week.

        Watch Steve get his own Dr Phil type show on TVOne in 3…2…

      • tezzybaby

        Steve looks like he should be in Madame Tussauds Wax museum, he looks so….caricature like.

        • WIP

          You’re right. He’s reminding me of Mr. Potato Head in that picture. He has the thick mustache, eyebrows, and lips. His skin is potato brown (in that lighting) and he’s very clean shaven. He’s does look almost too groomed- I think he’s a nice looking man though, LOL.

  • http://twitter.com/sweetdivalove Seti

    Did I furiously refresh this page so I could read the new post before I went to bed?!
    Yes
    *admitting myself to VSS/VSB Anonymous*
    That picture of Steve Harvey is just…..

  • Dee

    “Why do women get so upset when exes reach out shortly after a break to see how you all are doing?”

    Let me breathe….you just broke my heart, I don’t care to talk about the weather. I need to work on being ok with being ‘everyone’ and not ‘your girl’ anymore. For a while, every time you call/text/IM, there is a little piece of me that is hoping we’ll get back together (if it isn’t a mutual breakup). Every time that doesn’t happen it sets me back a little and puts another crack in my heart. ZCP-Zero Contact Policy. Do not violate this.

    2. Only if there are beautiful women with bigger butts and boobies then mine. And they are shaking them while clad in spandex or imbibing liquor (and not getting paid) I’m ok with a strip club, but not a club club.

    3. I date a lot of non-Black men, so for me it would probably be call me out my name.

    4. Becuase y’all don’t. Or at least most guys don’t make it look like they do.

    5. never asked, never will

    6. I don’t actively wish ill will, but, yeah, things might be easier if you were dead…..least you wouldn’t be with another chick….just saying….

    • IsOurChildrenLearning?

      Just out of curiosity…what does race have to do with your #3?

      • Anastasia!!!

        From what I got from it:: If we assume that Dee is black or of a black flavor and she dates non-black men often, one of her dealbreakers would be if the non-black man called her the infamous N-word.

        Right, Dee?

        • http://tdlove.wordpress.com Tonya

          Or maybe disparaged her race and gender..ie Black b!#$* or something like that..

          • Leonie UK

            Yep my universal rule also. Call me the N word or anything race related when your non Black is the deal breaker. Expected when you date non Black anyway, not that it’s happend so far.

          • Dee

            Yep…had a White guy do that. I, uh, extricated my self from, uh, his impalement, got dressed, and went home.

            I guess for any guy it would be if he hit me for no reason. It’s one thing if we’re fighting and it’s unclear who hit who first, and another if you just hit me to teach me a lesson or something.

            • Mr SoBo

              @Dee -“Yep…had a White guy do that. I, uh, extricated my self from, uh, his impalement, got dressed, and went home.”

              That is pretty brazen. Not only to drop the N bomb casually, but during chex??
              Its probably safe to assume he had called you that many times in his head, and that was the first time he verbalized it. Glad you bounced after you bounced.

              This however:
              “I guess for any guy it would be if he hit me for no reason. It’s one thing if we’re fighting and it’s unclear who hit who first”

              So you’re open to being hit so long as there is a valid reason, or if there is no clear initiator of first contact. Define valid reason?

              • http://www.flaglerhill.com MassAppeal

                i was thinking the same thing as I read this.

    • just joe

      for # 3 how does race apply/matter?

    • Tellylonglegs

      “Let me breathe….you just broke my heart, I don’t care to talk about the weather. I need to work on being ok with being ‘everyone’ and not ‘your girl’ anymore. For a while, every time you call/text/IM, there is a little piece of me that is hoping we’ll get back together (if it isn’t a mutual breakup). Every time that doesn’t happen it sets me back a little and puts another crack in my heart. ZCP-Zero Contact Policy. Do not violate this.”

      Preach!

    • rnic

      Nobody else needs to answer number 1, cause you hit the nail on the head. *clap for her*

    • Mo-VSS

      I’m liking the ZCP…I will have to use this term. And men do not seem to get it. No, I don’t wanna know about how your night was, who said what when you were at the grocery store and the like. It’s OVER…so let me be great and move on. Period!

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=25408399 Ms. Kay

      I’m late, but all I can say to you in amen!! The shyt just hit the fan with an ex, and he’s texting already. It’s one of those where you can’t even get back together or everyone in your LIFE would disown you. So it’s done, I couldn’t help but go off and tell him how much I hate (which I know is temporary, but i’m really convinced right now) One day negro?? Really!!

  • MzThang

    If we just broke up we have no reason talk so don’t even thing abt dialing my number. And I will def break up with someone if we haven’t been talking long to begin with and he pisses me off.

  • Phidelity15

    Read the post…love it and I’ll probably answer the rest of the questions later but #6…*sigh* its something I’m currently battling. I’ve only wished the most evil of hurt and pain on two exes and I can honestly say that yes, women can forgive and move on, but its definitely a struggle. Once a woman realizes that putting energy into hurt and pain and negative thoughts and actions actually stunt and stop her growth and advancement, she can stop hating her ex. Its a conscious thought process where (for me at least) you go from hoping you see his face/name in the paper under a tragic accident headline (and praying that you weren’t caught for the crime), to praying for his well being, safety and hoping he’s blessed.
    Like I said its really hard..but it can be done.

    • Leonie UK

      Singing ” I hope she cheats on you with a basketball player” this wil be your tune of the day lol

      • http://twitter.com/Phidelity15 Phidelity15

        Every super hero needs her theme music!

      • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

        you know, i keep forgetting to to do it, and i’m sure i’ll never get around to it since the moment has come and gone, but that song was the most retarded illogical sh*t ever. the first time i heard that song, no joke, i laughed and told my boy, “chick logic.”

        • http://twitter.com/Phidelity15 Phidelity15

          Its not even chick logic…its bitter b!tch syndrome. I had a lil rant about the song on twitter because when I first heard it I didnt like it at all. The song is not on the caliber of music you’d expect from Marsha and the lyrics are basic, bitter and unrealistic. No woman who is actively hating her ex wishes that his new woman cheats on him…we don’t want him happy at all, so if moving on and finding someone else makes him happy, we want that gone too. And if the new bish was able to snag a ballplayer, that means that she was an upgrade from you and who wants to actively know that he not only left you, but found someone better than you so much so that a ballplayer wants her?!?

          • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

            well um…exactly! i see we think alike.

        • http://www.shesoflyy.com Muze

          i love that song! lol

          “it may sound bitter… i’m a little bitter..”

          it’s hilarious.

          • Waitin’ for my Tea Cake

            Co-sign to the love for this song! I don’t think she was trying to make a logical argument I think she was trying to make a joke. AND she openly admitted that she was salty and bitter…and let us all remember that admitting your psycho is the first step! **Hi Marsha**

  • http://pinchmycheekie.wordpress.com Cheekie

    Ok, working on -.- status right now (“pretty tired and near bed-time mode, in English), so this may or may not be coherent…

    “1. Why do women get so upset when exes reach out shortly after a break to see how you all are doing?”

    Yup, it’s about the healing and whatnot. And part of that healing is “no contact.” If the wound is still fresh, it’s like pouring salt that you ain’t “really” in our life anymore. Yes, your intentions are good, and we see that… sometimes we just need space. Kinda like what you’re hinting at needing in number 2…

    “2. Do women really not like it when their man is having a lot of fun without her?”

    Eh, like I said yesterday I have to have SOME away time from the booski unless I’ll go insane, but I think it’s not so much that you’re having fun without her, it’s that she gets the impression that you wouldn’t have fun with her… or that you don’t want to be with her. Which, yeah is pretty crazy but ya know… feelings. whoa whoa whoa. feelings.

    “3. Is there anything universally that a man can do that will make a woman instantly breakup with him?”

    Down low? Not GO down low (that’ll get you good times). BE down low.

    “4. Speaking of working things out, do women always think its the man who’s not working hard enough to fix the problems?”

    I’ont know is it truly easy for anyone to admit they’re wrong? I mean, even when men do admit they’re wrong, I thought it was just to shut our yapping mouths up.

    “5. Why exactly do women ask questions like “you want to hit me?” after doing something that would obviously be worthy of a beat down? Like, why even ask that question?”

    I’mma have to ask Jeeves this one because I gots nuffin. (Is he even alive?)

    “6. Do women ever get over hating an ex that dumped her to the point that she doesn’t actively wish ill will up on him?”

    Sure, I’ve seen it happen within my own peoples. Mama Cheeks for example. Her man up and left her. Just bounced. She was upset, sure, but she shrugged it off and went about her bidness. Guess who’s calling who all obsessively? Mmmhmm.

    Oh, and this:

    “Or so it seems”

    Is some poignancy for you mothereffers. Yeah, it’s just a simple sentence, but adding that at the end made my left eyebrow levitate. Because I know ya’ll peen pimps are the Fiddy Cents today and asking all the questions, but I have to ask… Since ya’ll are so good with not letting what’s truly bothering you show (i.e. saying “I’m cool” for every dayum thang. ;) ), then how could we honestly believe that you truly let it go? Like you said, it seems…

    • YouMissMe

      My bullsh*t bar is set low in terms of what I will take in a relationship, but on behalf of all my girlfriends that continuously take trifling men back, I think we can agree that the relationship ends at the moment you hint at being on the down low.

      • CaribbeanQueen

        everyone is saying be on the down low… but I took that as a given. Because if a man is gay, its not like y’all could have had REAL romantic potential in the first place..

        • CNotes

          @CaribbeanQueen

          “Because if a man is gay, its not like y’all could have had REAL romantic potential in the first place..”

          I agree. My answer would be knowing that he participated in homosexual activities.

        • http://www.pinchmycheekie.wordpress.com Cheekie

          “its not like y’all could have had REAL romantic potential in the first place..”

          But there are countless stories of longstanding marriages that end due to someone coming out… and while they may have had suspicions, the marriage was still in place until they actually came out. That’s why I think it’s the ultimate and universal dealbreaker.

      • http://twitter.com/SmartFoxGirl SmartFoxGirl

        Cosign

    • Rae

      cosign on needing space after a breakup.
      also, reaching out immediately after a breakup is more to reassure him than seeing how you are. No one likes dumping anyone, and it sucks to feel like the bad guy. But tuff, be the bad guy, let me breathe and recollect & gather myself.

      • Dee

        @Rae: yeah, he’s just checking to make sure you haven’t killed yourself….

        • Rae

          see how selfish that is? pft men

    • http://www.alovelydai.com Alovelydai

      Ditto everything especially this: “Yes, your intentions are good, and we see that… sometimes we just need space”

      I would also add that men have an innate need to be liked. Part of the “check up” call is to gauge just how much he’s now disliked or hated.

      • Pretty Primadonna

        That’s exactly right.

    • Classy6ft5

      3. Is there anything universally that a man can do that will make a woman instantly breakup with him?”

      Down low? Not GO down low (that’ll get you good times). BE down low.

      THIS ^ is why I don’t mess with you.

      VERY true though!

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

      well since men notoriously don’t deal with sh*t. you can believe we let that ex go. however, that doesnt mean the scars from that relationship, both self-inflicted and unsolicited, won’t rear their heads at some point. its like we kill the messenger but never lose the message.

      • http://www.shesoflyy.com Muze

        “its like we kill the messenger but never lose the message.”

        i love this sentence. pure poetry. and true. smh.

      • http://www.pinchmycheekie.wordpress.com Cheekie

        “its like we kill the messenger but never lose the message.”

        Ah, I feelin’ this. No chexual harrassment.

    • http://thatswhatgemsaid.wordpress.com Gem of the Ocean

      I’mma have to ask Jeeves this one because I gots nuffin. (Is he even alive?)

      good question

    • HuhBruh

      “I’ont know is it truly easy for anyone to admit they’re wrong? I mean, even when men do admit they’re wrong, I thought it was just to shut our yapping mouths up.”

      Touché. Good point. We’ll take the hit in ego because we realize that silence is golden. I rank this method right above the Chewbacca defense.

  • http://nianaturally.blogspot.com N.I.A.naturally

    #1– A lot of the times, that ex is reaching out trying to get some post-breakup, emotional booty. Just move on… if I don’t call you, don’t call me. If it was a contentious breakup, i don’t give 2 piles of doodoo how you’re feeling. And if the breakup wasn’t bad, I’m still not interested in hearing from you. We are no longer together. Let
    s allow some time to past before we even think about being friends or even cool acquaintances.

    #2– I don’t have a problem with my man going to Vegas with the boys to have fun. As long as he doesn’t mind me going to Jamaica with these girls…

    #3– Infidelity and/or hitting me. Actually, raising a hand to me would be enough for me to bounce. I don’t play those kinds of games.

    #4– Some of you guys don’t want to talk about issues in the relationship. Instead, you try to keep of this all logic, no emotion facade. You talk to your mama, your boys, your weed man, anyone who might be able to give you some advice. You should be talking to your woman, and since you’re not talking to her, it appears as if you’re not working hard enough.

    #5– Who does this? I’ve never said such a thing to any man I’ve dated. smh… These chicks need therapy, and they probably need to be single while they’re in therapy.

    #6– I never wished ill on ex. Though, this boy who dumped me in HS, because I wouldn’t put out, ended up getting an STD from the fast girl in school. I kinds felt bad for him… kinda.

    • Hawaii

      *nods head at #4*
      LOL @ “your weed man” and I can just imagine him being like,
      “Maannn, I ain’t got time for all this. How much you need, yo?”

      • Yeah…So

        lol

    • http://twitter.com/nikkib1920 Capricorn

      #4 is my life right about now.

    • http://twitter.com/SmartFoxGirl SmartFoxGirl

      I double cosign your #4. I swear I want to put on a billboard “TALK TO YOUR WOMAN”. I never understood how ignoring issues just to keep peace is “working things out”. It’s called a cover up and problems never get solved this way.

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

      i’ve actually had two women who had pissed me off to the utmost levels of pisstivity recognize this fact and ask me, very bluntly, “so what, you want to hit me now?”

      now…of course i did. but that just aint in me. what it DID do though, was instantly cause a reframing in my mind of the type of chick i was dealing with and made me realize that this is the type of woman who might put me in jail. she’s nuts enough to introduce violence into a situation that’s never had any by implying the threat of it. needless to say, after those situations were sedated and the smoke cleared, i was never truly able to look at them the same way again.

      interesting enough, ive had one of those women nearly attempt to force me to hit her. she knew i wouldn’t, but she like started to get all up in my grill adn talk sh*t and like chest bump me and what not. and here’s the thing, i’m a very peaceful man. i like flowers and trees and sh*t. but i will get mad brolic in a second if you push the right button. i won’t put my hands on you – and i’ve never hit a woman or really even thought about it, excluding of course pushing down my sisters when we were like 9 – but i will attempt to use my voice to put the fear of God in you that it could be a very real possibility.

      thing is, if it has to get to that point, you’re dead to me anyway.

      • Be On It

        Wow, chick was bold and mad stupid. Sorry, I would never push a dude that far. All it takes is for his eyes to get that look like he has had enough, and I calm the heck down. I am too pretty, and the braces I paid for were too expensive, to get my face and/or grill effed up over some bs.

      • Girl Kanyeshrug

        Wow she was chest bumping you?
        I’d be afraid of actually getting hit and having hospital bills etc (I am a little bit cheap that way- you have to pay for the ambulance, every bit of medication, hospital stay, admin costs, food etc.)

        Yeh I said it – bills are my main concern

      • Yeah…So

        I think only hood chicks really try to fight men like dat… what say you PJ?

        • Yeah…So

          Why moderate me? I’m harmless.

        • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

          this chick was nowhere close to being hood. graduate degree, two parent household from the suburbs, etc. she just got mad froggy one day.

          • Yeah…So

            Yeah, but you said there were two… one of them chicks was hood. Anyway, this uh graduate degree, two parent household from the suburbs, etc don’t mean you not hood… I know plenty of hood chicks that know they daddy, got degrees and great jobs but will hop over a VIP rope with a skirt on quick… smh… for why ladies?

            • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

              that doesn’t make them hood, it makes them unstable.

      • keisha brown

        well that’s what you get for picking crazy over quality.
        sorry. but it’s been mentioned several times on this site that dudes will pick the crazy hot chick over the not so hot, not so crazy chick.
        so…
        you get what you pay for.

      • http://capriciousdevotee.blogspot.com/ The Capricious D

        Ehhh…that’s way abnormal. How’d you end up with two?????

        May wanna rethink your partner selection M.O.

    • Sula

      All of this.

    • http://www.twitter.com/SCSilk Silk!

      #6 happened to my sister….he dumped her on Xmas eve. Then he got more than an STD….he got a baby.