Dating, Relationships, & Sex, Lists, Pop Culture

Is Age Nothing But A Number?: 5 Reasons To Date Somebody Older Than Yourself

women-dating-older-menI’ve never really dated anybody who was much older than me.  In fact, the “oldest” chick I’ve ever dated only had me by a couple of months.  And by a couple, I literally mean 2.  Then again, you probably knew that since a couple can really only be 2 as opposed to a few which can be quite simply 2 or more, though not really 5.  You see, 5 is a handful, but one is the loneliest number that you’ll ever know.

Exactly.

So, the fact remains that despite not dating an older woman, I’ve witnessed a few situations where some of my compadres both hanglow and nohanglow have done so with outstanding results.  In fact, it often intrigued me.  My standing rule was that I’d date nobody older than 42 (when I was 25).  I figure that 18 years my senior, basically a standard American education (I shall call this measure of time a graduation), was old enough to have the insight to teach me a thing or two.

With education in mind, today, VSB P, your friendly neighborhood 3 and crime fighting loverman, will tell you just why you should date an older dust muffin.

1)  They’ve seen more pr0n than you

This facet cannot be emphasized enough.  Did you all know that pr0n used to have storylines?  It wasn’t all just 5 minute segments with a ridiculous lead in where some “random” woman is walking in a thong, a hangar, and a paperclip in her mouth and is all of a sudden open and ready for some stanky leg.  Actually, I guess after your done it’s the stanky leg.  Before hand, it should all be zestfully clean.  What happened to Zest.  Anyway, they can put you in scenes and roleplay with the best of them and the more pr0n you’ve seen, the more moves you know.  The more moves you know, well, the more you know the moves.

That was dumb.

2)  They don’t have ridiculous expectations

On the fo shizzle, a 50 year old woman isn’t out to play games and figure out life.  She’s probably got a solid 20 years left and only maybe 10 before she dries up into a ziploc bag.  You see, she’s single (or married and plotting her husband’s Lifetime Movie) so she’s in and out and down for one thing.

Smores.  And if you have time some of that good lovin.  You don’t have to play games.  You just do what you do.  You and your crew.

Believe it or not, that was an actual lyric from a popular rap song.

My guitar gently weeps for big face huuuuunids.

3) You don’t really have to mentally exasperate yourself

Or even used words like exasperate.  Older jawns (Philly what up) don’t care about your mental acumen.  They appreciate for you who you are because well, all that mental gymnastics is for marraige and chemistry.  All they want is the big bang and I’m pretty sure we covered that in physics.  So let’s get physic-al.

Man, I’m corny.

4)  They can probably hand-dance

I don’t know why but I feel like all old people can hand dance or step.  I imagine that even somebody 5 years older than me can do all kinds of amazing moves on the dance floor and jazzercise.  This is weird.  But I mean, it’s fun to watch, right?

5)  They can regale you with stories of dinosaurs the olden days

And what better way to get to sleep after schlumping a fossil than to drift off to the dulcet sounds of Masterpiece Theater-in-training.

So, good people of VSB, have you ever dated older (and I don’t necessarily mean senior citizen)?  Why?  What’s the oldest person you’d consider dating?  If you won’t date an older person, why not?

Whatcha say, whatcha say, huh?  Get money.

-VSB P aka THE ARSONIST aka TANGLE JIG P aka GIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIRL, HE A 3

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Panama Jackson

Panama Jackson is pretty fly for a light guy. He used to ship his frito to Tito in the District, but shipping prices increased so he moved there to save money. When he's not saving humanity with his words or making music with his mouth, you can find him at your mama's mama's house drinking her fine liquors. Most importantly, he believes the children are our future.

Previously

Career Moves 101

  • aceklub

    I thought the older women thing would work out in my favor but my old head was feenin’ for a relationship harder than jawns my age. She was about 8 years old than me so maybe I needed to add a few more years of separation to experience some of those points you made.

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

      @aceklub,

      next time, instead of 8, try 80 years older. women that age are generally so surprised to still be alive that they’re not as concerned about long-term commitments.

      • Ms. Hall

        @The Champ,

        I’mma pray for your soul Champ. You not right.

      • Ms. Hall

        @The Champ,

        I’mma pray for your soul Champ. You not right.

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

      @aceklub,

      next time, instead of 8, try 80 years older. women that age are generally so surprised to still be alive that they’re not as concerned about long-term commitments.

  • aceklub

    I thought the older women thing would work out in my favor but my old head was feenin’ for a relationship harder than jawns my age. She was about 8 years old than me so maybe I needed to add a few more years of separation to experience some of those points you made.

  • http://thinkprettysmart.typepad.com Ms. Smart

    40. Anything over 40 makes me itch. My ex is 40. At 41, the chance of for-old-times-sake-sex become impossible unless I dope up on Benadryl to stop the allergies.

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

      @Ms. Smart,

      Anything over 40 makes me itch

      does this apply to other parts of life as well? do you only go 39 on the highway? if a channel is 41, do you refuse to watch it? i’m curious and sh*t

      • http://thinkprettysmart.typepad.com Ms. Smart

        @The Champ, Naw. There’s something about saying I’m ‘talking politics’ with a man over 40 seems so creepy.

      • http://thinkprettysmart.typepad.com Ms. Smart

        @The Champ, Naw. There’s something about saying I’m ‘talking politics’ with a man over 40 seems so creepy.

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

      @Ms. Smart,

      Anything over 40 makes me itch

      does this apply to other parts of life as well? do you only go 39 on the highway? if a channel is 41, do you refuse to watch it? i’m curious and sh*t

  • http://thinkprettysmart.typepad.com Ms. Smart

    40. Anything over 40 makes me itch. My ex is 40. At 41, the chance of for-old-times-sake-sex become impossible unless I dope up on Benadryl to stop the allergies.

  • Selah

    So do you have something against snappin ya fingers?? and doing your step? I mean, after all… you can do it all by yourself. lol

    anyways. My age limit is probably 10 years older than me at the moment. I mean, any guy much older than that probably has kids and ex-wives (or wives).. Plus, they can’t seriously want a real relationship with a 21yo college senior. I’m great and all, but what can I bring to the table to a 45yo man who probably has a kid close to my age?

    • http://stickwithyocat.blogspot.com/ V.E.G.

      @Selah,

      When I was a 21 year old college senior, I dated and ended up moving in with a 33 year old man. It was a learning experience, to be sure.

      I do believe that every young girl needs to date an older man, at some point. I don’t think tying yourself down to him is wise (lesson learned) but a few dates and conversations here and there will do the mind – and body – good.

      Interestingly enough, when I was 31 I dated a 43 year old and found him to be very limited in his thinking and only marginal in his ‘abilities’. Go figure. I dumped him for a 25 year old. I kid. I already knew the 25 year old. :)

      • selah

        @V.E.G.,

        i see what you’re saying. I am attracted to older men (particularly all my ex’s fathers lol) … but the one time I did “date” this dude he was talkin to me bout daycare, gas bills and other random old person-ish… i was like uhmmmm BYE. lol perhaps when the right one comes along…

        and was what you had with the 25yo an actual relationship?

        • http://stickwithyocat.blogspot.com/ V.E.G.

          @selah,

          “was what you had with the 25yo an actual relationship”

          Yeah. I dated (dinners, concerts, met the fam, stuff like that) the 25 year old for quite some time when he was 22 and I was pushing 28. lol. He moved away for work and then popped up back in town, a few years later, when I was dating the 43 year old. We reconnected and the 43 year old was outta there.

          AND, thankfully, I’ve never met these older guys with ex-wives.

          • Selah

            @V.E.G.,

            the 25yo put the older one to shame. smdh. lol and yea… ex-wives just scare me. that’s a whole lotta baggage that I’m really not interested in. Nerp. I saw Stepmom. LOL

          • Selah

            @V.E.G.,

            the 25yo put the older one to shame. smdh. lol and yea… ex-wives just scare me. that’s a whole lotta baggage that I’m really not interested in. Nerp. I saw Stepmom. LOL

        • http://stickwithyocat.blogspot.com/ V.E.G.

          @selah,

          “was what you had with the 25yo an actual relationship”

          Yeah. I dated (dinners, concerts, met the fam, stuff like that) the 25 year old for quite some time when he was 22 and I was pushing 28. lol. He moved away for work and then popped up back in town, a few years later, when I was dating the 43 year old. We reconnected and the 43 year old was outta there.

          AND, thankfully, I’ve never met these older guys with ex-wives.

        • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

          @selah,

          lol at “gas bills” being old people sh*t

          • http://stickwithyocat.blogspot.com/ V.E.G.

            @The Champ,

            Yeah. I never knew paying basic utilities was an old person thing. Guess I was old at 19. :(

          • http://stickwithyocat.blogspot.com/ V.E.G.

            @The Champ,

            Yeah. I never knew paying basic utilities was an old person thing. Guess I was old at 19. :(

          • Selah

            @The Champ,

            lol. he was havin troubles with his gas bill. i’ve never even paid one plus he was too old to be having those “troubles” soooo I was quite uninterested.

          • Selah

            @The Champ,

            lol. he was havin troubles with his gas bill. i’ve never even paid one plus he was too old to be having those “troubles” soooo I was quite uninterested.

        • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

          @selah,

          lol at “gas bills” being old people sh*t

      • selah

        @V.E.G.,

        i see what you’re saying. I am attracted to older men (particularly all my ex’s fathers lol) … but the one time I did “date” this dude he was talkin to me bout daycare, gas bills and other random old person-ish… i was like uhmmmm BYE. lol perhaps when the right one comes along…

        and was what you had with the 25yo an actual relationship?

      • http://www.sistersoundoff.blogspot.com Cheekie

        @V.E.G.,

        “I do believe that every young girl needs to date an older man, at some point. ”

        That’s what Imma tell my man Denzel. He’d be doing a public service.

        • http://stickwithyocat.blogspot.com/ V.E.G.

          @Cheekie,

          lol

        • http://stickwithyocat.blogspot.com/ V.E.G.

          @Cheekie,

          lol

      • http://www.sistersoundoff.blogspot.com Cheekie

        @V.E.G.,

        “I do believe that every young girl needs to date an older man, at some point. ”

        That’s what Imma tell my man Denzel. He’d be doing a public service.

      • Leila

        @V.E.G., lol. The oldest guy that I ever dated was 11 years my senior. I was 20 and he was 31. He was a great guy, but it didn’t last long. Now I’m 31 and I tend to attract guys between 25-30.

      • Leila

        @V.E.G., lol. The oldest guy that I ever dated was 11 years my senior. I was 20 and he was 31. He was a great guy, but it didn’t last long. Now I’m 31 and I tend to attract guys between 25-30.

    • http://stickwithyocat.blogspot.com/ V.E.G.

      @Selah,

      When I was a 21 year old college senior, I dated and ended up moving in with a 33 year old man. It was a learning experience, to be sure.

      I do believe that every young girl needs to date an older man, at some point. I don’t think tying yourself down to him is wise (lesson learned) but a few dates and conversations here and there will do the mind – and body – good.

      Interestingly enough, when I was 31 I dated a 43 year old and found him to be very limited in his thinking and only marginal in his ‘abilities’. Go figure. I dumped him for a 25 year old. I kid. I already knew the 25 year old. :)

    • Frederico Savage

      @Selah, I’m sure a tender thundercat such as yourself could give ol’ fella the much needed second wind he’s been denied by staying with bitter ol’ Geriatric Getrude all these years. What can you bring to the table you ask: The opportunity for ol’ fella to dedicate his last meaningful thrusts to you? Where, you wonder: Dead smack on that there table. =)
      All jokes aside. An older man who can land a younger woman (and not feel like she’s just waiting for him to check out so that she can cash out) will have a renewed sense of self-worth. This could be very beneficial to the young woman’s sanity, body image (since he’ll be glad not to have prune tatas on his menu) and hell, she’ll probaly score the appreciation and respect these young bwoys forget to dish her way. OR he could be crazyyyy, derannned. I’m just saying…

      • selah

        @Frederico Savage,

        LOL!!!! I think you’ve just convinced me to hit up the old person home down the street. Bingo night, anyone?

        *still giggling at prune ta tas. lol

      • selah

        @Frederico Savage,

        LOL!!!! I think you’ve just convinced me to hit up the old person home down the street. Bingo night, anyone?

        *still giggling at prune ta tas. lol

    • Frederico Savage

      @Selah, I’m sure a tender thundercat such as yourself could give ol’ fella the much needed second wind he’s been denied by staying with bitter ol’ Geriatric Getrude all these years. What can you bring to the table you ask: The opportunity for ol’ fella to dedicate his last meaningful thrusts to you? Where, you wonder: Dead smack on that there table. =)
      All jokes aside. An older man who can land a younger woman (and not feel like she’s just waiting for him to check out so that she can cash out) will have a renewed sense of self-worth. This could be very beneficial to the young woman’s sanity, body image (since he’ll be glad not to have prune tatas on his menu) and hell, she’ll probaly score the appreciation and respect these young bwoys forget to dish her way. OR he could be crazyyyy, derannned. I’m just saying…

  • Selah

    So do you have something against snappin ya fingers?? and doing your step? I mean, after all… you can do it all by yourself. lol

    anyways. My age limit is probably 10 years older than me at the moment. I mean, any guy much older than that probably has kids and ex-wives (or wives).. Plus, they can’t seriously want a real relationship with a 21yo college senior. I’m great and all, but what can I bring to the table to a 45yo man who probably has a kid close to my age?

  • http://stickwithyocat.blogspot.com/ V.E.G.

    I have dated a few older men, with the greatest age difference being 12 years. One of my very good friends is an ex, who was/is six years my senior.

    I don’t have a preference for older men but I do like men who have done some ish in their life – been a few places, etc. It seemed like, for a while, those guys tended to be older. As a bonus they also had a sense of maturity about them (though, that can be deceiving. The 33 year old I dated when I was 21 was a big baby. Just didn’t realize it till later).

    However, in recent years, I started meeting guys nearer my own, guys in their late 20s to mid 30s, who have some life experiences and are pretty interesting people. Thank God. I didn’t want to be in my late 40s changing some old fool’s Depends.

    • selah

      @V.E.G.,

      “I didn’t want to be in my late 40s changing some old fool’s Depends.”

      LOL yea, i think at some point you have to think about the future. A man 15 years your senior is gon be really old as H E double Hockey sticks waaaayyy before you. And then things stop working. smh.

    • selah

      @V.E.G.,

      “I didn’t want to be in my late 40s changing some old fool’s Depends.”

      LOL yea, i think at some point you have to think about the future. A man 15 years your senior is gon be really old as H E double Hockey sticks waaaayyy before you. And then things stop working. smh.

    • Yaa

      @V.E.G., LOL! That’s the only set back to dating older. He will be OLD before you are so you have to be ready for all the old age illnesses & what nots.

    • Yaa

      @V.E.G., LOL! That’s the only set back to dating older. He will be OLD before you are so you have to be ready for all the old age illnesses & what nots.

  • http://stickwithyocat.blogspot.com/ V.E.G.

    I have dated a few older men, with the greatest age difference being 12 years. One of my very good friends is an ex, who was/is six years my senior.

    I don’t have a preference for older men but I do like men who have done some ish in their life – been a few places, etc. It seemed like, for a while, those guys tended to be older. As a bonus they also had a sense of maturity about them (though, that can be deceiving. The 33 year old I dated when I was 21 was a big baby. Just didn’t realize it till later).

    However, in recent years, I started meeting guys nearer my own, guys in their late 20s to mid 30s, who have some life experiences and are pretty interesting people. Thank God. I didn’t want to be in my late 40s changing some old fool’s Depends.

  • Anonymiss

    Well I have yet to date someone significantly older than myself. Right now I’m 18 and the oldest I’m willing to go is probably 24 <– even that seems kind of old to me. But I think its preferable for a woman my age m to date guys that are 21+ just because guys my age are so immature (well most of them anyways)… && they're broke lol

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

      @Anonymiss,

      Right now I’m 18 and the oldest I’m willing to go is probably 24 <– even that seems kind of old to me

      it is. put it this way, while they might be attractive to you, you probably don’t want to seriously date a 24 or 25 year old who’d actually date someone who could still be in high school

      • http://www.myspace.com/thagrindaholic BLUNTBLAZER

        @The Champ,
        high skoo chicks always had the 20 yr old guy that had cars n shii i hated them untill i was the 20 yr old guy with the car n shiii gettin at the breeezys

        • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

          @BLUNTBLAZER,

          LOL.

        • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

          @BLUNTBLAZER,

          LOL.

      • http://www.myspace.com/thagrindaholic BLUNTBLAZER

        @The Champ,
        high skoo chicks always had the 20 yr old guy that had cars n shii i hated them untill i was the 20 yr old guy with the car n shiii gettin at the breeezys

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

      @Anonymiss,

      Right now I’m 18 and the oldest I’m willing to go is probably 24 <– even that seems kind of old to me

      it is. put it this way, while they might be attractive to you, you probably don’t want to seriously date a 24 or 25 year old who’d actually date someone who could still be in high school

  • Anonymiss

    Well I have yet to date someone significantly older than myself. Right now I’m 18 and the oldest I’m willing to go is probably 24 <– even that seems kind of old to me. But I think its preferable for a woman my age m to date guys that are 21+ just because guys my age are so immature (well most of them anyways)… && they're broke lol

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