Featured, Pop Culture, Race & Politics

How Abigail Fisher Is All The Worst Parts Of Ron Weasley From Harry Potter

I am pretty big Harry Potter fan.

Not quite on the “Pottermore comments section” level, but I own books three through seven in hardback. When book seven ultimately dropped, I went back and reread the whole series from the beginning. I’ve watched every movie. And I was even an apologist for the first two, which were unapologetically terrible.

For those of you who didn’t follow the series – which, if you didn’t then what the hell is wrong with you? – there were three main characters. Harry, of course, is the titular character. But there were also his two sidekicks: Hermione Granger and Ron Weasley.

Hermione was an all around badass. She was smart as a whip and knew it, she had wit for days, and she had a mean twist out. Ron, on the other hand? Nice enough dude. But ultimately all around middling, in talent and ability. What he DID have over the other two, however, was access. Ron was born in the wizarding world, molded by it, and ultimately had a leg up on minor things that Harry and Hermione could never intrinsically know. And even with that reinforcement, he still occasionally gave into his worst characteristics. Namely, being deeply envious of the competencies that Harry and Hermione had, even while receiving benefits they never had.

I say all that to say that Abigail Fisher is the worst parts of Ron Weasley, even down to their physical likenesses.

Abby Fisher is sincerely convinced that she was denied admission to the University of Texas in favor of less qualified students due to race. Mind you, she was rejected. Not waitlisted, but rejected. She didn’t even get friend zoned by the school she is convinced she was a perfect match for. Her entire petition to the Supreme Court boils down to “I never went to jail and I don’t have any kids, so where’s the bad bitch that I was promised?

Boo, you aint a 10. You aint even really a solid seven. Her scores and grades were more mediocre than the current season of Empire. As the ancient African proverb goes, don’t go chasing waterfalls.

As we’ve been shown time and time again, however, that’s how privilege works. It’s summarily assuming that if a person of color got into a school and you didn’t, they must have been less qualified than you — even if they took the same classes as you and had the same coursework as you and took the same bus as you. It’s almost as if that ideology is ingrained with every bite of green bean casserole.

The rub of it all is that this all went down in 2008. Since then, Abby has gone on to graduate from a top school and get a damn good job. Why. Are. You. Still. Mad. Boo? *claps for emphasis* In 2008 I had fallen out with a friend who had basically abandoned me in Thailand, and I still can’t bring myself to be incensed over my near-deportation almost seven years ago.

Are LSU alums not salty that Dear Abby is out here basically telling the US Supreme Court that the institution that gave her a diploma ain’t a lick of shit? Does she not realize that at the end of the day, a degree is a degree? Again I ask, why is she still so mad? Did her UT Alum dad remind her of her rejection every year at Thanksgiving while passing the green bean casserole?

I’m not even going to bother to really break down the impact of the Abbys of the world intrinsically assuming that her Black counterparts are somehow under qualified for a spot she deemed herself entitled to. I’ve spent too much of my life proving my worthiness to White people in both personal and professional spaces, and folks like Abby Fisher and Antonin Scalia are just going to have to stay mad while they chow down on their unseasoned meatloafs (or is it meatloaves? QTNA) and lament a world where they’re not just given stuff because they decided that they deserve it. I learned that lesson when I was five and my mom asked me if “I had McDonald’s money.”

Long story short: I can only hope that the Supreme Court of the United States teaches her that too when they send her lily-why posterior back from whence she came.

Shamira Ibrahim

Shamira is a twentysomething New Yorker who likes all things Dipset. You can join her in waxing poetically about chicken, Cam'ron, and gentrification (gotta have some balance) under the influence of varying amounts of brown liquor at her semi-monthly blog, shamspam.tumblr.com

  • AlwaysCC

    i’m trying not to laugh too loudly about this since i’m at work. i really just don’t understand why courts are actually giving this the time of day…

    • Val

      White feelings are at stake. That’s why SCOTUS is hearing this. There are no merits beyond that.

  • MsKitty

    The only good thing to come from this chickie’s tantrum was the #StayMadAbby twitter hashtag. Made my heart swell with pride seeing all those pics of Black and Brown folks out there getting it done.

    • QuirlyGirly

      Yes the #StayMadAbby hashtag is awesome and I love to see all the Black and Brown folks moving on and prospering despite what Abby may think.

    • miss t-lee

      YES.
      I loved it.

  • mochazina

    thank you for answering my questions about what she’s done with her life since she was denied… i was too lazy to care to look it up. that being said, as a LA native, i’m a lil sad that she’s now attached to my state via her degree. *insert stank face* she can stay mad for all i care.

  • The Supreme Court is playing games. This girl lost in the local circuit court in Texas, which is why it went to the Supreme Court in the first place. The Supreme Court kicked it back TO the local circuit court, and still the local circuit was like, “Nah, bih.” Which is why they’re back at the Supreme Court.

    Chile, you been curved. You been curved umpteen times.* Get some self respect, boo!

    *Andplusalso! Even with the 2nd tier admission process, her a s s still lost out to White kids. Forty-seven kids were accepted via the 2nd tier admission process. Only five of them were Black; the rest were White. WHY IS SHE STILL TRYING?!

    • Sigma_Since 93

      Do you see the parallels between her situation and the Republican quest to repeal the Affordable Healthcare Act?

      • Fo sho. Keep at it and keep at it and keep at it ’til they get their way, in some conceivable fashion. Even though they aren’t getting their way.

      • Ah, where I was down with Republicans because 1) F*ck the government on principle and 2) the ACA doesn’t address the real hustles jacking up costs.

  • NKORigible

    I haven’t and AM NOT even following the original story because “I love my life” but ROTFLMAO…

  • Courtney Wheeler

    God…I really hate green bean casserole.

  • Brass Tacks

    *Takes off Invisibility Cloak*

    These muggles annoy me. Who are you to question my intelligence and the work ethic? You didnt take these O.W.L.s, you didnt help me pass these N.E.W.T.s.

    “Accio Bench”

    Please have several seats.

    Also. You still being too nice, Sham. Shes a weak 3 at best.

    *Puts back on Invisibility Cloak*

    • Oluseyi

      A VERY weak 3. Like, a this-is-where-the-brown-paper-bag-over-the-head-myth-originates 3.

      • Sigma_Since 93

        More like Eddie Murphy in Boomerang “can it get a little darker” 2.5

        • Oluseyi

          Ayeeeee. You ain’t even lie, mang.

      • Brass Tacks

        Lol paper bag? Thats still being too nice, Olu.

        Laying with her (in any capacity) would be entirely too nice.

        Just a road to misery and regret afterwards.

        • LadyIbaka

          She ain’t yo type? Watchu like?

        • RewindingtonMaximus

          Laying with her?

          No. There’s no laying with her. You don’t LAY with a can of paint.

        • Oluseyi

          Don’t act like you don’t see them self-hating knee-grows out there holding hands with Abby-spec Beckys feeling they got themselves a catch. You won’t. I won’t. But you know some fool will, tragically.

          • RewindingtonMaximus

            I never understood that. Like bruh….why you dating Leatherface? The fuck man?

          • This isn’t the post for it, but I could write a thesis on those dudes…

          • Because… actually, never mind.

      • RewindingtonMaximus

        I’d use her picture to torture ISIS members for information.

        Clearly it wouldn’t take long.

        • Yoooo. Speaking of ISIS, what the h e l l El Chapo done put out a hit on the whole crew?!

          How, Sway?

          • RewindingtonMaximus

            Honestly, that’s his competition right there. I aint even mad at him. Their neck of the woods got that good heron. So good, you got to leave out the “i”.

            He’s just upping the ante on them.

            • At this point, why do we need governments again? LOL

              • RewindingtonMaximus

                Staaaahp it. You know exactly why.

                Not saying what we got is worth it, but no one can be trusted to do better either if we got rid of everything.

                I’d like to see it though. Just to know for myself.

                • Real talk though, that story was ill. I also think both sides are missing the point with the affirmative action debate to the point where this is SCOTUS click bait.

                  • RewindingtonMaximus

                    It’s always gonna be bait click, but honestly, once again, the never-ending saga about a saga that should have ended A LONG FUCKING TIME AGO.

                    America can’t make up her mind. I need her to sit in the corner and drink out of her little red cup.

                    • The problem is that American society has a fetish for the maudlin while avoiding the deeper causes of things which would reveal fundamental flaws. We could fix this, but the resulting societal disorder scares people too much. We’d rather have oppression where the oppressors are old friends.

                  • Epsilonicus

                    You keep trying but lets be real. Scalia was being racist. He was not about trying to suggest the actual solution to root causes. Stop.

        • Oluseyi

          You MONSTER! ?

          • RewindingtonMaximus

            I know right? I’d rather be waterboarded.

        • Asiyah

          LOL OMG!

        • Here We Go

          Bwahaha!!!

    • PhlyyPhree

      “Accio Bench”
      Have several seats…

      Do you know the spell to bring me back to life? Because that was pretty fuckin flawless

    • Lea Thrace

      I might have to fight my Naija sister @LadyIbaka:disqus for you based off this comment alone.

      I.
      Am.
      Dying.

  • Sigma_Since 93

    I just wish I could be that Black person at her job so I could be petty on purpose. It would be even better if I were a UT alum. Since I’m not my Blackness will suffice as I remind her she was not chose.

    • Michelle

      I’ll be the type to not answer my phone, when she calls, just so she can get up from her cubicle and walk over.

  • Oluseyi

    The most fascinating thing to come out of the case is the revealing depths of Justice Scalia’s racism, believing that black people aren’t smart enough for “top tier” schools and do better at “less demanding” institutions (all data says… no, ninja), closely followed by Justice Roberts lamenting “how looooooooong” we need to keep affirmative action around.

    Pray for Justice Sotomayor, that she don’t go BX on them fools!

    • Sigma_Since 93

      I’m waiting for the Notorious one to go in on him.

      The mere fact he’s using faulty data pisses me off and it shines a light on how folks (white folks) really view HBCU’s

      What about the white folks who chose to attend them? John Edwards was not considered to be an inferior lawyer by attending North Carolina Central’s Law school.

      • Oluseyi

        Watch Privilege Work.

        What the data actually says is that all students graduate at better rates from more selective institutions, probably because they have more and better resources to help students who are struggling.

        “Carry yourself with the confidence of a mediocre white man,” indeed!

        • Sigma_Since 93

          It reminds me of when I would hear connected White guys say “I got a Gentleman’s C from {insert Ivy League school} and my connections along with the school cache get me the job at Goldman.

          • Here’s a simple solution: go to straight numbers on the table. The problem is that as it stands, anyone not Asian (even the White kids believe it or not) are underrepresented at top state schools. We’d got back to the situation 100 years ago where Jewish kids bumrushed the ivy league, and we got a convoluted admissions process to hide antiSemetic BS.

          • Oluseyi

            At least they admit it.

          • QuirlyGirly

            But what is sad is that those with Gentleman’s C end up in positions of power.

            • fxd8424

              Can we say George W. Bush who was a “C” student, scoring 77% (with no As and one D in astronomy). Grade point average 2.35 out of a 4.0 at Yale no less.

              • momatad

                please do not judge all white people by that flake. There are a good number of us out here who are embarrassed that the village idiot’s father/brother/handlers got him elected.

                • Guest

                  We don’t.

                • Mary Burrell

                  Which flake Bush or Scaila?

                  • momatad

                    Meant Shrub, but you do make a point……Scalia should be wearing his white robe, not the black one, and the little pointy hat that goes with it.

              • Mochasister

                Damn, those grades are pitiful. And yet he still wound up being President. White mediocrity. Gotta love it.

          • heyheyno

            My sister had an interview at Goldman last week. She goes to Hampton. That would probably make Gentleman C feel silly.

            • Mochasister

              Not in the least. Gentleman C would say that your sister only got the interview because she’s a double minority. Due to affirmative action Goldman HAS to interview and hire more minorities. Women like your sister are “taking” jobs from more deserving white men. He wouldn’t dare admit that she or any other Black woman could possibly be smarter than him and get an interview or job through pure merit. To admit that would be a crushing blow to his ego.

              • heyheyno

                You’re right he would certainly find an excuse smh

                • Mochasister

                  Funny how they always have “excuses” or “reasons” for why they are not successful. It’s never their fault.

                  • Free Mind

                    I assume you are talking about URMs ?

        • Point taken, but that leads to an interesting argument. Should we just shut down the crappy schools and expand the larger ones?

          • Oluseyi

            In a couple decades it won’t matter. The internet coming for more than 85% of these overgrown vocational programs.

            • I’m not sure about that. I see the potential, but I also see a lot of BS involved all the way around. I’m not fully sold on them yet.

              • Oluseyi

                That’s why I said decades. There’s a lot of charlatans in the space right now, but also a lot of legit operations. A ton of the costs and resulting exclusivity associated with colleges is just overhead.

          • heyheyno

            Which schools would you classify as crappy?

    • Roberts has a point. If affirmative action was supposed to be a temporary solution, why aren’t we working on more permanent ish? And Scalia has me thinking about the shenanigans that is academic science, and I got a keg of tea to spill. LOL

      • Justice Roberts’ position only makes sense if you believe the premise that affirmative action has, by and large, put Black and Brown people (regardless of gender) in more spaces they might’ve not have filled were it not for the presence of said action. However, affirmative action has actually put more White women in spaces, so I find Justice Roberts’ “concern” to be more faux and disingenuous than anything.

        • I see where you’re getting at. My point is more remedying the real education gaps that make affirmative action a strategy in the first place. My cynical self thinks that a grand total of no one wants to actually fix ish.

          • RewindingtonMaximus

            The problem with affirmative action is the same problem with welfare.

            Black and brown people are the posters boys/scapegoats, when in reality White women been eating GOOOOOD for the entire time. And of course, White men aint never using their statistics to show that little reality, less they mess up their chances to keep having White women to sleep with.

            • Very true. Interesting enough, the few people who put White women and welfare on blast are the MRAs. Agree with them or not, a lot of them have done their homework.

          • Because an actual solution would require first truly acknowledging that systemic issues are real.

            • Janelle Doe

              yup.

          • fxd8424

            You would be correct.My cynical self thinks that a grand total of no one wants to actually fix ish.”
            You would be correct.

        • Question

          Justice Roberts’ position would also only make sense if steps were actively being taken to address the root causes of disproportionate representation in collegiate admissions by looking downstream and focusing on improving educational opportunities received in Black communities.

          • In this specific case, it seems as though Notorious RBG brought up the question of disproportionate representation. I believe she asked about how the presence of the Top 10% program in Texas seemingly relies on the perpetuation of segregated neighborhoods in the state in the first place (as a means of getting the top ten in predominantly Black or predominantly Latino neighborhoods).

      • Oluseyi

        But Roberts isn’t speaking of permanent, conclusive solutions, only of ripping off the temporary bandage and letting the blood spill where it may. Or am I missing something?

        • True… But ain’t a whole lot of people pushing for permanent solutions either, at least that doesn’t get buried in the press. (And stop before you get your links. I’ve read them, and seen how few f*ck result from them.)

          • Oluseyi

            No, I’m with the inadequacy of the present system. But affirmative action is a late-stage remediation for inequalities perpetrated from before birth. America has no real interest in righting those wrongs, so it’s mostly content to leave the band-aid in place and tell itself it’s “done something.”

            • I could go in, but I’ll say this. There are a lot of people (including Black folk) getting paid off the status quo. Why fix it, particularly if it’ll take money out of your pocket?

              • Oluseyi

                I mean, aren’t entrenched interests always the keys to perpetuating inequality and injustice?

            • Wild Cougar

              They don’t want to remedy the problem, they want to get rid of the remedy, plain and simple.

              • Val

                And that is really what’s going on here, everything else is just a smokescreen.

            • NomadaNare

              Come with it

          • QuirlyGirly

            Why push for a permanent solution when the temporary one continues to be the scapegoat people need to let out their frustrations and keeps the status quo going.

            • True. Because it would require that White people pay for their own poor who are drinking and drugging themselves to death.

              • RewindingtonMaximus

                They will never do that. Take away every person with melanin in their skin out this country, and they would still find a way to blame something besides poor white people for how bad things are.

                On some “we gotta eliminate squirrels! They are taking our jobs! They are causing way too many accidents on the road and jacking up the insurance rate! They are making our kids take meth!”

                • Also theres the real fact that they’ve papered over real ethnic and cultural differences to go after people they can exploit. Take away that means of exploitation, and things get real. Donald Trump’s whole campaign is but a symptom of the bigger issue, which is danced around in the press.

                  • RewindingtonMaximus

                    Exactly. It’s always easy to take shots at people who can’t clap back. But the one day when they can, look at who suddenly becomes the “victim”.

                • DebKII

                  I dont know if I agree with that. Denmark and all white countries over there have great education/health insurance/public service in general. Because…white

                  If its a monolitic culture, looks like they take care of erybody.

                  • Epsilonicus

                    But Europe is quite a bit different than America.

                    • DebKII

                      Lol I didnt say it wasn’t. But the UK and france and spain have similar problems as us when it comes to those above issues, however more white countries dont…im just looking at patterns here.

                    • Epsilonicus

                      If America became monolithic, it still would give no dambs about its poor. Because the poor white people do not believe they are poor. They believe they are one opportunity away from being a millionaire.

                    • DebKII

                      But they can believe that because they are one step over people of color. They never believe they are poor because they have an at least we aren’t them mentality.

                    • Val

                      I think if POC were not apart of the equation then poor Whites would begin to believe they were truly poor. Now we, Black folks, are the poster children representatives of poverty. That new reality would change how they see things.

                    • Epsilonicus

                      I completely disagree. If nothing hanged in history except our presence, America would still believe what it believes. That means very weak social safety net

                    • Val

                      I disagree, Black folks have always been used as the reason not to do for the poor. The message was/ is Black folks are trifling and that’s why they’re poor, so why do for trifling Blacks.

                      Take away the Black folks and poor Whites would never stand for letting themselves be used as a foil in that way.

                    • spaceghost06

                      Utah is one of the whitest states in the nation. They had a homeless problem. Here was their solution

                      https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/inspired-life/wp/2015/04/17/the-surprisingly-simple-way-utah-solved-chronic-homelessness-and-saved-millions/

                    • Oluseyi

                      It may be interesting to look at the extent of colonial conquest and both forced and voluntary migration associated with white countries, and then examine their present-day social welfare policies and racial attitudes. I’ll put twenty on you finding a staggering correlation, at least.

                  • RewindingtonMaximus

                    That’s not what I’m saying. Every country intrinstically has a problem with looking at their problems about social class and race. That’s what makes it easy for people to compare countries and act like many others don’t have the same problems the United States have, when truthfully, they tend to be far worse but kept in private.

                    America loves to neglect the fact that poor White people are their biggest portion of the population. You are not going to piss off your majority. So they stick all of the bad stereotypes that affect our society on all minority groups. But one day, if there were no minority groups except White women only, I do wonder how they would approach the issue. Because no one is going to come outright and blame poor white people. Ever.

                • Free Mind

                  It is incredible how often the commenters on this thread are guilty of what they are talking about, while they are talking about it.

                  • RewindingtonMaximus

                    It’s incredible how often no name, no pictured commenters want to just randomly come to sites they’ve never posted on and arrogantly chastise someone else. As if somehow, you’re far removed from your complaint. As if somehow, you are not guilty. As if somehow, you know what youre talking about.

                    For you to be right, I’d have to be born into a majority population, that has a rich history of hundreds of years of imperialism, prejudices, injustices, and outright narcissism against every other race conceived on this planet. But I’m not. So….as always..you’re wrong.

                    • Free Mind

                      I am chastising no one. Your original comment was ignorant, so I brought it to your attention. So.. you’re welcome.

                    • RewindingtonMaximus

                      My comment was correct. I’m not interested in your view if it however because…you’re irrelvant. And I’ve yet to see yet to see how you proved I was wrong on top of that.

        • Amber

          It’s basically the voter rights act on repeat. SCOTUS doesn’t see the need for it and will leave it to either states or congress to fix the real problems that affirmative action was implemented to temporarily mitigate. The problem with that is there will never be real solutions to fixing the education system and income inequality coming from elected officials.

          • Oluseyi

            ??MESSAGE!

        • Jacqueline

          No, you are correct. This is how the current Republican party operates. Peep their approach to the Affordable Healthcare Act.

      • NomadaNare

        Because affirmative action obviously isnt finished doing its job

        Can we get at least as much time as we were slaves

    • Janelle doe

      The irony for me is how no one ever talks about how well “affirmative action” worked/s for mediocre white men. It is only when it was called out and applied to other groups that it becomes an issue.

      • Oluseyi

        “Whoa! Hey, now, there! Don’tcha go talkin’ no mess ’bout the Good Ole Boys’ Network, now! Gettin’ all uppity in yer britches, now, are ya?”

        Teach.

      • Mochasister

        Now you know they worked hard and pulled themselves up by their bootstraps! No one gave them a handout; didn’t you know their grandfathers all came to this country with only $5 in their pockets?! We Negros are just lazy and want something for nothing. If we would just work hard…

  • Eva_baby

    This is some next level literary analysis. I am here for this. So much the truth. If you think about it, if Hogwarts only accepted on merit, then Ron definitely would have been there only as a legacy. I daresay he was an affirmative action* appointee when he got the Prefect position that should have gone to Harry.

    Anyhow, I am still boggled that this “suit” is even being heard. If you are gonna argue meritocracy should only matter then at least have the credentials to back it up.

    *fully acknowledging that white women are the ones who are being the most advantaged by Affirmative Action.

    • QuirlyGirly

      This is why I don’t get her lawsuit. Here is a white woman, who receives the most advantage out of AA and most likely got beat out by another white woman, but wants to blame her not getting due to a minority “taking” her spot. I don’t understand how this could be proven?

      • Val

        Perception is everything, apparently.

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