Comments on: Homies, Pals, Hombres and Hombrecitas.

By: mssmtaylor

mssmtaylor — Fri, 23 Jan 2009 20:19:40 +0000

@The Champ,

LOL

By: mssmtaylor

mssmtaylor — Fri, 23 Jan 2009 20:12:58 +0000

@The Champ,

I just hit the floor

By: swt cheeks

swt cheeks — Thu, 22 Jan 2009 21:29:29 +0000

@GOODENess, you read my mind!! I was just about to suggest meetup.com. I think it takes away some of the awkwardness because the whole point of the website is to connect/re-connect w/ new people, so pretty much everyone on there is looking to make a few friends. I’ve only gone to a few meetup events, but so far it has been a positive experience (last event I met some lovely ladies from all over the world – spain, scotland, france…)

I moved from to nyc 2 years ago from the west coast, and even as a female, it was a little hard to trying to meet *genuine* people. It helped that I had a lot of ‘associates’ from my HBCU, but most of them were ppl that I wouldn’t hang out with beyond happy hour….so I’m still learning how & where to meet new folks.

By: GOODENess

GOODENess — Thu, 22 Jan 2009 19:39:12 +0000

ain’t read none of the comments…cuz I don’t reed gud no moe! but anyway…I am seriously entertaining relocating to another state and one of my clients suggested, I go to http://www.themeetup.com to meet like minded folks in my perspective new area! it is a site that lets people create eGroups based on similar interests and then the group goes offline for outings and sh1t…the site serves as a bulletin board for the groups etc… kind of like VSB… yeah I typed it! haven’t checked it out yet, but my client uses it locally and hasn’t stopped raving about it yet!

Also, try using business cards… in the scenario in the post…dude A could have said… “yeah we should shoot some hoops or something, hit me up” (passes card) see? was that hard? or mariposa? maybe slightly less than masculine but it got the job done… and there could een be another thread of convo about what they do for a living and sh1t…you know?

(sidebar) do men still “shoot hoops”?

By: profunksticated

profunksticated — Thu, 22 Jan 2009 14:52:42 +0000

In a 12-step fellowship, folk are encouraged to exchange numbers. I have a network in the Philly-South NJ. That said, after I moved from the Philly-South NJ to the DMV, I attended a few meetings but had no real intention of networking, but a met a guy who insisted on calling me and that I call him. It felt a little awkward, ’cause this guy is somewhat off the chain and is well known in the fellowship around these parts. He has introduced me to a lot of folks.

That said, I really am not looking for any new male BFFs at 49. Just the way it is.

By: WuDaMan

WuDaMan — Thu, 22 Jan 2009 13:44:36 +0000

@Blackroot, lil word of advice don’t use the phrase ‘happy ending’ when talking about male friends. Just a lil word of advice

By: Ambra

Ambra — Thu, 22 Jan 2009 07:17:50 +0000

@The Champ, What up!? I know I’ve been MIA. I’m makin a comeback though I swear. Love what you’re doin here with VSB.

By: Blackroot

Blackroot — Thu, 22 Jan 2009 05:37:10 +0000

first off, yall make me laugh over here.

second, relax. you’re making too big of a deal of this man-friend thing. acknowledge the awkardness–’one can’t be sure of another’s intentions these days, but don’t worry, i just wanna kick it, i don’t wanna lick it’–give him your number or email and walk away.

or you could tell the guy where you’re gonna be at another point in time–say, a game or show or local place where everyone goes–and invite him to come. you meet up again, hang out, and then you’re on the way to becoming friends. happy ending.

By: Stank-0

Stank-0 — Thu, 22 Jan 2009 04:36:49 +0000

I have to say the comment thread here is on point. Ya’ll seem like some chill cats.

I think if men think too much about *how* they will make other guy friends then that’s where the problems occur. I guess I don’t think too hard on it because in the Midwest, you are more or less taught to be personable.

It seems like the East coast makes it significantly more difficult but it can be done. The first friend I made in Alexandria I made on the ball court, he’s my peoples to this day.

I learned in DC as well that if you do things you like you will meet other people who like to do them as well. Then just been sociable and the friends will pile up.

I miss DC, Denver is cold and there’s no shorties, ie lots of women with big booties.

By: Quasar

Quasar — Thu, 22 Jan 2009 04:34:30 +0000

I moved to DC from London a few months ago. Meeting people and making friends was definitely something I was worried about before coming- I only knew 2 people in the entire country! Luckily I was able to settle in quickly but after reading this post I feel like I would have had a much harder time of it as a bloke…

Women are much more open to making plans with other women even if they have just met (within 2 minutes of meeting- W1- I just love your earrings. They are super boho! W2- Thanks I got them at Eastern Market. W1- Where is that? I havent had a chance to go shopping here yet. W2- I’ll take you this weekend. Whats your number?

And a friendship is born.