we sparked it yesterday…

v renee: Define ho. I’m curious to know, what you think makes someone a ho, besides the been around the block factor. If you’re single and grown, most are more than likely you have at least been to the corner or at least mailbox.

the champ: defining ho is more of an art than a science. its hard to explain…but you kind of just know one when you see one.

for the sake of the reply though, here’s my stab:

if the amount of sexual partners you’ve had in your life exceeds the amount of friends you’ve had, you were a ho

if every guy you’ve ever been with has had “magic stick” treatment (if they hit once, they can hit whenever they want) for years, then you were a ho

if the amount of people you’ve been with once quadruples the amount of people you’ve been with more than four times, then you were a ho

if your private parts look like the trashcan in a supermarket deli, you were a ho

slut.

ho.

tramp.

slore.

strumpet.

the rolling definition of what constitutes “ho” behavior has more conditions and variables than gem’s panty drawer a sidekick contract, a dynamic which creates myraid questions.

do sheer numbers carry the most weight? if so, how do age and circumstance factor when making this consideration?

what about specific acts/people? is ho-dum mostly defined by exactly what/who someone is willing to do, and how willing they are to do it/them?

where does the over-prioritization of sex factor in to all of this? is someone who’d drop their close friends and serious responsibilities quicker than a meth head’s twich just for the potential sniff of some ass in possession of more “ho-like” qualties than someone who merely just fits their indiscriminate boning into their daily schedule?

lastly, should any of this even matter? as long as consenting adults are mutually partaking in this behavior, why should anyone even care how many hundreds of thousands of consenting adults a person has practiced this behavior with?

anyway though, slattern hussies good people of vsb.com, how would you define ho-dom, what tangible signs (if any) are there that someone might have been running continual drawer-less marathons around the coitius block…and should it even matter?

—the champ

Filed Under: ,
Damon Young

Damon Young is the editor-in-chief of VSB. He is also a columnist for GQ.com and EBONY Magazine. And a founding editor for 1839. And he's working on a book of essays to be published by Ecco (HarperCollins). Damon is busy. He lives in Pittsburgh, and he really likes pancakes. Reach him at damon@verysmartbrothas.com. Or don't. Whatever.

Previously

flag on the play

  • question

    going back to yesterday (sorry, i should’ve really posted this yesterday, but you brought it up again)… what about a reformed ho? why would a reformed ho still be dealing with ish? is there no hope for anyone who’s ever been a ho?

    • “what about a reformed ho? why would a reformed ho still be dealing with ish?”

      Reformed ho? What, did they go to ho rehab or sumfin?? Do Ho-hab programs include “12 steps of building back disintegrated sugar walls”? or “How not to slob the knob of every Tom, DICK, and Hairy (balls)”? I don’t get it.

      YESSS I’m back! *pumps tiny fist*

      • Peyso

        Y r ur fist so tiny?

        • LOL.

        • LOL.

        • PBG

          Luvvie’s fists are probably tiny because she’s tiny or used to be in a former life (like me…*eyeroll*). Small people tend to have (some) small parts. My fists are tiny and I have ears and feet the size of an average 2nd grader.

          • U r right, PBG. I’m of the petite persuasion, so my fists r small. Imagine someone small w/ big hammer fists. EEWWW

            • PBG

              I know a chick about my height and thickness (size 8) and she wears a damn 9.5 shoe!! She just looks disproportionate as all get out to me. Even though I can never find a decent shoe in my size, I’m still thankful for my size 6 feet!

            • PBG

              I know a chick about my height and thickness (size 8) and she wears a damn 9.5 shoe!! She just looks disproportionate as all get out to me. Even though I can never find a decent shoe in my size, I’m still thankful for my size 6 feet!

          • U r right, PBG. I’m of the petite persuasion, so my fists r small. Imagine someone small w/ big hammer fists. EEWWW

        • PBG

          Luvvie’s fists are probably tiny because she’s tiny or used to be in a former life (like me…*eyeroll*). Small people tend to have (some) small parts. My fists are tiny and I have ears and feet the size of an average 2nd grader.

      • Peyso

        Y r ur fist so tiny?

      • Do Ho-hab programs include “12 steps of building back disintegrated sugar walls”?

        ho-hab??

        • Yes, Champie. Ho-Hab: Where legs go learn to stay closed. Where walls are rebuilt. Where most college students need to go.

          • shay-d-lady

            Yes, Champie. Ho-Hab: Where legs go learn to stay closed. Where walls are rebuilt. Where most college students need to go.

            LMAO.. yeah most freshmen curriculum includes Hodom 101

          • shay-d-lady

            Yes, Champie. Ho-Hab: Where legs go learn to stay closed. Where walls are rebuilt. Where most college students need to go.

            LMAO.. yeah most freshmen curriculum includes Hodom 101

        • Yes, Champie. Ho-Hab: Where legs go learn to stay closed. Where walls are rebuilt. Where most college students need to go.

      • Do Ho-hab programs include “12 steps of building back disintegrated sugar walls”?

        ho-hab??

    • “what about a reformed ho? why would a reformed ho still be dealing with ish?”

      Reformed ho? What, did they go to ho rehab or sumfin?? Do Ho-hab programs include “12 steps of building back disintegrated sugar walls”? or “How not to slob the knob of every Tom, DICK, and Hairy (balls)”? I don’t get it.

      YESSS I’m back! *pumps tiny fist*

    • Gem of the Ocean

      is there no hope for anyone who’s ever been a ho?

      good question. not having been a ho, i can’t provide a testimonial.

      perhaps we can take a VSB poll:
      as a former ho, can you be the change an SO can believe in??

      • eff yo couch

        “is there no hope for anyone who’s ever been a ho?”

        First off, I think there are different types of ho’s. Growing up, my 1st encounter with a ho was the 12 year old chick on the block that humped all the ninja’s, sometimes 2 or 3 at the same time. So in this case, in order for that ho to have a chance, she would have to move to another state to get a fresh start and that’s if she’s still fresh (read: disease free and still has walls). But usually these type of ho’s start playing for the other team by the time they are 17. Why is this?

        • But usually these type of ho’s start playing for the other team by the time they are 17. Why is this?

          maybe because they have run out of shyt and men to do? LOL I dont know but I noticed this phenom when I went to my highschool reunion a while back…

          • But usually these type of ho’s start playing for the other team by the time they are 17. Why is this?

            this is actually a sign of early sexual abuse.

          • But usually these type of ho’s start playing for the other team by the time they are 17. Why is this?

            this is actually a sign of early sexual abuse.

          • Peyso

            There a howish ways make them feel that all men aint sh*t b/c just about every men has only used them for their bodies. But many times they dont realize is that they’re the reason that all men used them for their bodies.

          • Peyso

            There a howish ways make them feel that all men aint sh*t b/c just about every men has only used them for their bodies. But many times they dont realize is that they’re the reason that all men used them for their bodies.

        • But usually these type of ho’s start playing for the other team by the time they are 17. Why is this?

          maybe because they have run out of shyt and men to do? LOL I dont know but I noticed this phenom when I went to my highschool reunion a while back…

        • question

          lol you know me or something? after some 12-14 y/o ho-ing i moved to another state (disease free and never preggo!) and i’ve been a good girl ever since… (minus some brief college freshman ho-ishness, but haven’t we all been there? lol)

          i recently fell IN LOVE in love for the first time ever and got cheated on… BAD. this is the only time i’ve ever been cheated on — to my knowledge, but the champ’s post had me wondering… :’-(

          • but the champ’s post had me wondering… :’-(

            wondering about what?

            welcome, btw and sh*t

            • V Renee

              I believe she meant wondering if the reason she was cheated on was because she’s a reformed h*e.

            • V Renee

              I believe she meant wondering if the reason she was cheated on was because she’s a reformed h*e.

          • but the champ’s post had me wondering… :’-(

            wondering about what?

            welcome, btw and sh*t

        • question

          lol you know me or something? after some 12-14 y/o ho-ing i moved to another state (disease free and never preggo!) and i’ve been a good girl ever since… (minus some brief college freshman ho-ishness, but haven’t we all been there? lol)

          i recently fell IN LOVE in love for the first time ever and got cheated on… BAD. this is the only time i’ve ever been cheated on — to my knowledge, but the champ’s post had me wondering… :’-(

        • my 1st encounter with a ho was the 12 year old chick on the block that humped all the ninja’s, sometimes 2 or 3 at the same time

          i’m sorry… but i can’t call a 12 year old acting out like this a “ho”… this is a little girl who had some serious issues. poor thang.

        • my 1st encounter with a ho was the 12 year old chick on the block that humped all the ninja’s, sometimes 2 or 3 at the same time

          i’m sorry… but i can’t call a 12 year old acting out like this a “ho”… this is a little girl who had some serious issues. poor thang.

      • eff yo couch

        “is there no hope for anyone who’s ever been a ho?”

        First off, I think there are different types of ho’s. Growing up, my 1st encounter with a ho was the 12 year old chick on the block that humped all the ninja’s, sometimes 2 or 3 at the same time. So in this case, in order for that ho to have a chance, she would have to move to another state to get a fresh start and that’s if she’s still fresh (read: disease free and still has walls). But usually these type of ho’s start playing for the other team by the time they are 17. Why is this?

      • Mochablast

        @Gem of the Ocean,

        Nice question…I am not a ho either HOWEVER, I do know a few. I would say that some can be reformed and some can not. I believe that it takes for a ho to hit bottom and want to change before she makes a difference. There are ho’s that have confidence problems and no self love. I think that a ho needs to deal with that inorder to want to better themselves. You can not change a Ho into a lady until they want to change.

      • Mochablast

        @Gem of the Ocean,

        Nice question…I am not a ho either HOWEVER, I do know a few. I would say that some can be reformed and some can not. I believe that it takes for a ho to hit bottom and want to change before she makes a difference. There are ho’s that have confidence problems and no self love. I think that a ho needs to deal with that inorder to want to better themselves. You can not change a Ho into a lady until they want to change.

    • Gem of the Ocean

      is there no hope for anyone who’s ever been a ho?

      good question. not having been a ho, i can’t provide a testimonial.

      perhaps we can take a VSB poll:
      as a former ho, can you be the change an SO can believe in??

    • well if the prevailing notion is that you can’t turn a ho into a housewife (and i know two dudes who can prove it, convincingly) i have to wonder how you reform. aside from just going nun-al and finding Hayseuss, in which case nobody will truly believe you in the first place.

      thing is, being a ho might be akin to getting labeled something you’re not…if everybody thinks you’re a ho, then by default you’re a ho. lol. sad but true. then again, stereotypes are rooted in truth.

      i said nothing in this comment.

      • Ro

        Not true… you did say something that grabbed my attention.
        thing is, being a ho might be akin to getting labeled something you’re not…if everybody thinks you’re a ho, then by default you’re a ho.

        I do not agree with you 100% on that one. B/c sometimes… The word that’s going around the block could be stemmed from jealousy or hate and not necessarily truth or any rendition of said truth. It could simply be the hyped up rantings of opinionated truth, in other words…a rumor or gossip.

        And now for my “hood-ish” example:
        If you heard from JJ who heard from June who heard from T who heard from Kisha who heard from Tiffany who heard from Peaches and nem that LaLa is a Ho, only LaLa isn’t a how and Peaches is just jealous of LaLa b/c the boy who used to be with Peaches is now with LaLa… that doesn’t make her a Ho. That just means that everybody believes that Peaches and nem’s opinionated truth is whats real when in fact, it’s just her hatin!

        Personally, my definition of what a ho is changes like my daily lunch choice. I call it like I see it and if I’m wrong, and I’m usually not, I will be woman enough to accept that I was wrong, if it happens, which it rarely does.

        I’m not a ho, never been a ho, don’t exhibit ho-like behavior. That hasn’t stopped a few rumors to be circulated about me. Do I let it bother me, a little b/c it’s my reputation that they are screwing with and I work very hard to maintain my rep as it stands. I don’t take kindly to ruining my hard work. The only reason it doesn’t bother me too much is b/c those who know me,have a pretty good idea about who I am and what I’m about. I don’t worry about it, but it does poison the minds of future friends, associates, contacts, networking possiblities, etc. etc. Which could directly/indirectly affect my finacial intake, which would mean i’d have to directly/indirectly affect your health and physical fitness. I’m not saying…. I’m just saying.

        Wow!! This was way longer than I intended… oh well!

        • I’m not a ho, never been a ho, don’t exhibit ho-like behavior.

          this aint what i heard

        • I’m not a ho, never been a ho, don’t exhibit ho-like behavior.

          this aint what i heard

        • PBG

          “…If you heard from JJ who heard from June who heard from T who heard from Kisha who heard from Tiffany who heard from Peaches and nem…”

          That chick Kisha always got her name in somebody’s mouth. She keep some mess goin’ on.

          Every gossip chain or rumor ramification has a chick named “Kisha” all up and through it.

        • PBG

          “…If you heard from JJ who heard from June who heard from T who heard from Kisha who heard from Tiffany who heard from Peaches and nem…”

          That chick Kisha always got her name in somebody’s mouth. She keep some mess goin’ on.

          Every gossip chain or rumor ramification has a chick named “Kisha” all up and through it.

      • Ro

        Not true… you did say something that grabbed my attention.
        thing is, being a ho might be akin to getting labeled something you’re not…if everybody thinks you’re a ho, then by default you’re a ho.

        I do not agree with you 100% on that one. B/c sometimes… The word that’s going around the block could be stemmed from jealousy or hate and not necessarily truth or any rendition of said truth. It could simply be the hyped up rantings of opinionated truth, in other words…a rumor or gossip.

        And now for my “hood-ish” example:
        If you heard from JJ who heard from June who heard from T who heard from Kisha who heard from Tiffany who heard from Peaches and nem that LaLa is a Ho, only LaLa isn’t a how and Peaches is just jealous of LaLa b/c the boy who used to be with Peaches is now with LaLa… that doesn’t make her a Ho. That just means that everybody believes that Peaches and nem’s opinionated truth is whats real when in fact, it’s just her hatin!

        Personally, my definition of what a ho is changes like my daily lunch choice. I call it like I see it and if I’m wrong, and I’m usually not, I will be woman enough to accept that I was wrong, if it happens, which it rarely does.

        I’m not a ho, never been a ho, don’t exhibit ho-like behavior. That hasn’t stopped a few rumors to be circulated about me. Do I let it bother me, a little b/c it’s my reputation that they are screwing with and I work very hard to maintain my rep as it stands. I don’t take kindly to ruining my hard work. The only reason it doesn’t bother me too much is b/c those who know me,have a pretty good idea about who I am and what I’m about. I don’t worry about it, but it does poison the minds of future friends, associates, contacts, networking possiblities, etc. etc. Which could directly/indirectly affect my finacial intake, which would mean i’d have to directly/indirectly affect your health and physical fitness. I’m not saying…. I’m just saying.

        Wow!! This was way longer than I intended… oh well!

      • Intellectual Hedonist

        @PDJ,

        I have to disagree too

        I was at least 2 years younger than my high school counterparts and wasn’t even 18 till my sophomore college year, and I had mad people hating on me cause I was smart and ish…. anywho I had a horrible reputation while in high school and didn’t even know about it and I was still a virgin. YES I WAS! cause people were hating on me.

        “The word that’s going around the block could be stemmed from jealousy or hate and not necessarily truth or any rendition of said truth”

        sums up my adolescent life

      • Intellectual Hedonist

        @PDJ,

        I have to disagree too

        I was at least 2 years younger than my high school counterparts and wasn’t even 18 till my sophomore college year, and I had mad people hating on me cause I was smart and ish…. anywho I had a horrible reputation while in high school and didn’t even know about it and I was still a virgin. YES I WAS! cause people were hating on me.

        “The word that’s going around the block could be stemmed from jealousy or hate and not necessarily truth or any rendition of said truth”

        sums up my adolescent life

      • Gem of the Ocean

        LOL @ Hayseuss

      • Gem of the Ocean

        LOL @ Hayseuss

    • well if the prevailing notion is that you can’t turn a ho into a housewife (and i know two dudes who can prove it, convincingly) i have to wonder how you reform. aside from just going nun-al and finding Hayseuss, in which case nobody will truly believe you in the first place.

      thing is, being a ho might be akin to getting labeled something you’re not…if everybody thinks you’re a ho, then by default you’re a ho. lol. sad but true. then again, stereotypes are rooted in truth.

      i said nothing in this comment.

  • question

    going back to yesterday (sorry, i should’ve really posted this yesterday, but you brought it up again)… what about a reformed ho? why would a reformed ho still be dealing with ish? is there no hope for anyone who’s ever been a ho?

  • I define “ho” as someone who consistently has sex with a myriad of partners with no established connection or relationship or who uses sex as a bargaining tool for material especially or emotional (sometimes) gain.
    and it is important only because the more s.e.xual partners a person has the more at risk for disease that person is but if its past behavior and all tests have come back clean…

    • I agree. Howeish tendencies in themselves can stem from victimization, being molested, low self esteem, and a host of other reasons-and a lot of it has to do with the mysoginist, male dominated, s*x obsessed culture we live in. Women have been led to believe they have to step out of character and engage in all sorts of f***ery to be loved, even if for a night. It is my firm belief that no woman, if given a choice, would choose to be in a casual sexual relationship, that will never amount to anything more. There are legions of empty, broken, depressed women out there because they thought they could sleep their way to happily ever after. The porn industry, music videos, unrealistic standards of beauty and Hollywood culture are all part of the larger machine of self hatred.

      I cannot tell you how many girls I know who thought that all they had to do was be a down arse chick, until the side effects of guilt and feelings of worthlessness all but consumed them and sets them on a vicious cycle (exluding reformed howes). This to me is a sign that h*-dom is not for us ladies.

      • eff yo couch

        “The porn industry. . . are all part of the larger machine of self hatred. ”

        Porn is apart of self hatred. When males watch it, they literally beat themselves up. If that ain’t self hatred, I don’t know what is

        • P*rn is apart of self hatred. When males watch it, they literally beat themselves up. If that ain’t self hatred, I don’t know what is

          **snickering**

        • P*rn is apart of self hatred. When males watch it, they literally beat themselves up. If that ain’t self hatred, I don’t know what is

          **snickering**

        • actually, they beat themselves down

        • actually, they beat themselves down

        • Ironically, it’s self love also.

        • Ironically, it’s self love also.

      • eff yo couch

        “The porn industry. . . are all part of the larger machine of self hatred. ”

        Porn is apart of self hatred. When males watch it, they literally beat themselves up. If that ain’t self hatred, I don’t know what is

      • It is my firm belief that no woman, if given a choice, would choose to be in a casual sexual relationship, that will never amount to anything more

        I am agreeing with everything u said but this… I know plenty of women who would have casual s*xual relationships, but maybe don’t do it cuz they don’t want to be labeled a “ho”…

      • It is my firm belief that no woman, if given a choice, would choose to be in a casual sexual relationship, that will never amount to anything more

        I am agreeing with everything u said but this… I know plenty of women who would have casual s*xual relationships, but maybe don’t do it cuz they don’t want to be labeled a “ho”…

      • Jen

        So truuuue. Every word.

      • Jen

        So truuuue. Every word.

    • I agree. Howeish tendencies in themselves can stem from victimization, being molested, low self esteem, and a host of other reasons-and a lot of it has to do with the mysoginist, male dominated, s*x obsessed culture we live in. Women have been led to believe they have to step out of character and engage in all sorts of f***ery to be loved, even if for a night. It is my firm belief that no woman, if given a choice, would choose to be in a casual sexual relationship, that will never amount to anything more. There are legions of empty, broken, depressed women out there because they thought they could sleep their way to happily ever after. The porn industry, music videos, unrealistic standards of beauty and Hollywood culture are all part of the larger machine of self hatred.

      I cannot tell you how many girls I know who thought that all they had to do was be a down arse chick, until the side effects of guilt and feelings of worthlessness all but consumed them and sets them on a vicious cycle (exluding reformed howes). This to me is a sign that h*-dom is not for us ladies.

    • this is a great definition!!!

      i definitely agree with the “uses sex as a bargaining tool for material especially or emotional gain”… you’s a hoooooooooo HOOOOOOOOOO….

    • this is a great definition!!!

      i definitely agree with the “uses sex as a bargaining tool for material especially or emotional gain”… you’s a hoooooooooo HOOOOOOOOOO….

  • I define “ho” as someone who consistently has sex with a myriad of partners with no established connection or relationship or who uses sex as a bargaining tool for material especially or emotional (sometimes) gain.
    and it is important only because the more s.e.xual partners a person has the more at risk for disease that person is but if its past behavior and all tests have come back clean…

  • Killa K

    To balance the scale, i’m going to say what I think makes a man a ho.

    If he’s ever ran a train on a woman. Ho

    If he keeps a list of the women he’s bang. Ho

    If he makes it a point to bang a woman every chance he can get. Ho

    That’s all for now

    • Pretend like I’m stupid: why is keeping the list ho-like?

      • i’m wondering this too…lol…not that i got a list or anything, i’m just saying.

      • i’m wondering this too…lol…not that i got a list or anything, i’m just saying.

      • Killa K

        I’m a little late with a response but it has a lot to do with a person’s mentality.

        Usually, if a person has only been with a handful of people they can easily remember and no not need a list. But people who keep a list fall in one of two category: 1)they plan on banging a lot of people so they start a list to keep track or 2) they’ve been with so many people that a list needs to be created. Hence a ho.

        Seriously think about it. What would drive a person to create a list of people they’ve slept with?? Am I missing other reasons?

        Note: this does not exclude people who are ho’s that do not have a list.

        BTW, I can count on one hand how many people i’ve been with and do not need a list. Hence, not a ho.

      • Killa K

        I’m a little late with a response but it has a lot to do with a person’s mentality.

        Usually, if a person has only been with a handful of people they can easily remember and no not need a list. But people who keep a list fall in one of two category: 1)they plan on banging a lot of people so they start a list to keep track or 2) they’ve been with so many people that a list needs to be created. Hence a ho.

        Seriously think about it. What would drive a person to create a list of people they’ve slept with?? Am I missing other reasons?

        Note: this does not exclude people who are ho’s that do not have a list.

        BTW, I can count on one hand how many people i’ve been with and do not need a list. Hence, not a ho.

    • Pretend like I’m stupid: why is keeping the list ho-like?

    • “If he keeps a list of the women he’s bang. Ho”

      Shoot, if he’s freaked so many people that he cant even keep a list, THAT would make him ho-tastic.

      • Gem of the Ocean

        lol good point.

      • Gem of the Ocean

        lol good point.

      • eff yo couch

        “Shoot, if he’s freaked so many people that he cant even keep a list, THAT would make him ho-tastic”

        *holds head in shame*

        • Intellectual Hedonist

          eff, hold your head high.

          this is the primary reason I don’t keep a list!

          no shame

        • Intellectual Hedonist

          eff, hold your head high.

          this is the primary reason I don’t keep a list!

          no shame

      • eff yo couch

        “Shoot, if he’s freaked so many people that he cant even keep a list, THAT would make him ho-tastic”

        *holds head in shame*

      • Peyso

        You kinda just lowered my self esteem a little

      • Peyso

        You kinda just lowered my self esteem a little

    • “If he keeps a list of the women he’s bang. Ho”

      Shoot, if he’s freaked so many people that he cant even keep a list, THAT would make him ho-tastic.

    • im glad you wrote “he” as did chaotic diva below..im feeling that male ho-dom doesn;t have the same social stigma as female ho-dom and gets different formulas and what not.

      moreover, i really don’t care how you slice and dice those numbers in the calculator amount of sexual partners (be it with someone 1 time or 20 times) is still an important number. Can’t a man/woman be a serial commitment hoe..nevermind im going to sleep.

      • im glad you wrote “he” as did chaotic diva below..im feeling that male ho-dom doesn;t have the same social stigma as female ho-dom and gets different formulas and what not.

        you know it is.. of course being a male h* comes with way less stigma and they tend to not have to live with long term repercussions like women do.
        That is male privilage….LOL

        • “you know it is.. of course being a male h* comes with way less stigma ”

          indeed..i just wanted to be clear about that as it related to this post. I went to school with a girl who (at our little “fireside” chat”) admitted she had 30 sexual partners at 19. She got a lot of flack for admitting that.

          but then i got to thinking about the guys our age at the time. was she only a hoe because her number exceeded her male counterparts? Does her number suggest more sex#ual freedoms and exploration that men naturally resent?

          should i take my @zz to bed (at 1:27am est)?

          • but then i got to thinking about the guys our age at the time. was she only a hoe because her number exceeded her male counterparts? Does her number suggest more sex#ual freedoms and exploration that men naturally resent?

            I mean I think its 2 parts.. I mean the sheer number of 30 based on her age.. makes anyone a h.o..but also I have seen it in action most men will consider a woman a h.o if the number of men she admits to is either more than their number or within like 5….

          • but then i got to thinking about the guys our age at the time. was she only a hoe because her number exceeded her male counterparts? Does her number suggest more sex#ual freedoms and exploration that men naturally resent?

            I mean I think its 2 parts.. I mean the sheer number of 30 based on her age.. makes anyone a h.o..but also I have seen it in action most men will consider a woman a h.o if the number of men she admits to is either more than their number or within like 5….

          • i think 30 at age 19 is a problem…hell, when i was in high school (in my more rambunctious days) my girlfriend at the time divulged to me that she’d had 10 partners by the time she got to me…lol. let’s keep in mind that we were 16 when we got together. and i know she probably slept with AT LEAST two more new people while we were together.

            needless to say, she was a ho. used up by 18. so sad.

            • “i think 30 at age 19 is a problem”

              Is 30 a problem at 30? what about for a man. I dont know I think there is a natural double standard that exists in the definition. I’m really feeling that if a woman’s sexual partner count exceeds her male counterpart she get;s the standard hoe stamp.

              • there is a natural double standard, however, unless she lost her virginity at like 15, its like she hit the ground running. 30 partners for anybody by age 19 definitely qualifies one for ho-dom b/c it implies indiscriminatasticness. she couldn’t have been getting much from it…

              • there is a natural double standard, however, unless she lost her virginity at like 15, its like she hit the ground running. 30 partners for anybody by age 19 definitely qualifies one for ho-dom b/c it implies indiscriminatasticness. she couldn’t have been getting much from it…

            • “i think 30 at age 19 is a problem”

              Is 30 a problem at 30? what about for a man. I dont know I think there is a natural double standard that exists in the definition. I’m really feeling that if a woman’s sexual partner count exceeds her male counterpart she get;s the standard hoe stamp.

            • there is a natural double standard

              i don’t think there is anything natural about the double standard… cause standards are different in every culture. Our standards in this country are purely a social construct, it’s just been this way so long that we take it as being natural.

            • there is a natural double standard

              i don’t think there is anything natural about the double standard… cause standards are different in every culture. Our standards in this country are purely a social construct, it’s just been this way so long that we take it as being natural.

          • i think 30 at age 19 is a problem…hell, when i was in high school (in my more rambunctious days) my girlfriend at the time divulged to me that she’d had 10 partners by the time she got to me…lol. let’s keep in mind that we were 16 when we got together. and i know she probably slept with AT LEAST two more new people while we were together.

            needless to say, she was a ho. used up by 18. so sad.

        • “you know it is.. of course being a male h* comes with way less stigma ”

          indeed..i just wanted to be clear about that as it related to this post. I went to school with a girl who (at our little “fireside” chat”) admitted she had 30 sexual partners at 19. She got a lot of flack for admitting that.

          but then i got to thinking about the guys our age at the time. was she only a hoe because her number exceeded her male counterparts? Does her number suggest more sex#ual freedoms and exploration that men naturally resent?

          should i take my @zz to bed (at 1:27am est)?

        • That is male privilage….LOL

          you’re right. it is.

          oh well

        • That is male privilage….LOL

          you’re right. it is.

          oh well

      • im glad you wrote “he” as did chaotic diva below..im feeling that male ho-dom doesn;t have the same social stigma as female ho-dom and gets different formulas and what not.

        you know it is.. of course being a male h* comes with way less stigma and they tend to not have to live with long term repercussions like women do.
        That is male privilage….LOL

    • im glad you wrote “he” as did chaotic diva below..im feeling that male ho-dom doesn;t have the same social stigma as female ho-dom and gets different formulas and what not.

      moreover, i really don’t care how you slice and dice those numbers in the calculator amount of sexual partners (be it with someone 1 time or 20 times) is still an important number. Can’t a man/woman be a serial commitment hoe..nevermind im going to sleep.

    • Scipio Africanus

      Wrong on all counts.

      Ho-dom is not about what you do. It’s about whether you’re receiving what you want in return for your actions.

      That is to say, ho-dom is defined as there being an imbalance in any sort of trade between two people:

      -s/he gives her what she wants, but gets none of what s/he wants back.

      This could be physical/emotional/monetary/work/time, etc.

      • Peyso

        I agree.

        Although being a ho has alot to do with the raw number, it also has to to with how that number was reached. If you were gettin smutted out in a back alley, you’re a ho. If somebody was calling you out of ur sleep, making you walk/take a cab to their house, w/o paying for the cab, smutting you out w/ total disregard for ur sexual pleasure, then not having the decency to pay for a cab back or take u home or let u spend the night, you my friend are a shmeeze.

        • V Renee

          Is it wrong that I love the phrase smutted out?

          • miss t-lee

            Nah…I’m thinking I may have to work this into my vocab.

          • miss t-lee

            Nah…I’m thinking I may have to work this into my vocab.

          • Peyso

            No but it might be wrong if you love being smutted out.

          • Peyso

            No but it might be wrong if you love being smutted out.

          • PBG

            I’m kinda feeling “shmeeze” myself.

            • Gem of the Ocean

              hehe yeah “shmeeze” is a good one.

              • miss t-lee

                Me 2.
                I love new slang.

              • miss t-lee

                Me 2.
                I love new slang.

            • Gem of the Ocean

              hehe yeah “shmeeze” is a good one.

          • PBG

            I’m kinda feeling “shmeeze” myself.

        • V Renee

          Is it wrong that I love the phrase smutted out?

        • isn’t that more just treating them like a prostitute? i mean, she may really be feeling you and not KNOW that she’s finna get the “catch a cab back home and fix me a sandwich” treatment. like, is it not possible that this is just a naive chick? she’ll learn in time not to let no man treat her like that (hopefully) or she’ll go into porn. but just treating a chick like a ho doesnt make her a ho to me…

          • Peyso

            It has to make her (or him) o h.o if she (he) allows you to do it, repeatedly.

            • no… it makes them either naive or afraid to loose something (you, your approval or something twisted) if they defend themselves… and what does it make u to treat someone like this?

              • 8th Wonder

                “and what does it make u to treat someone like this?”

                That my friends, is the question.

              • 8th Wonder

                “and what does it make u to treat someone like this?”

                That my friends, is the question.

              • no… it makes them either naive or afraid to loose something (you, your approval or something twisted) if they defend themselves… and what does it make u to treat someone like this?

                This is why more women need to use discretion! They want something YOU have, don’t think you’re going to be invited to the party if you do it, cause you might not.

              • no… it makes them either naive or afraid to loose something (you, your approval or something twisted) if they defend themselves… and what does it make u to treat someone like this?

                This is why more women need to use discretion! They want something YOU have, don’t think you’re going to be invited to the party if you do it, cause you might not.

              • Peyso

                Lets say that all ppl involved are shmeezes and leave it at that

              • Peyso

                Lets say that all ppl involved are shmeezes and leave it at that

            • no… it makes them either naive or afraid to loose something (you, your approval or something twisted) if they defend themselves… and what does it make u to treat someone like this?

          • Peyso

            It has to make her (or him) o h.o if she (he) allows you to do it, repeatedly.

          • but just treating a chick like a ho doesnt make her a ho to me…

            interesting point and sh*t

          • but just treating a chick like a ho doesnt make her a ho to me…

            interesting point and sh*t

        • isn’t that more just treating them like a prostitute? i mean, she may really be feeling you and not KNOW that she’s finna get the “catch a cab back home and fix me a sandwich” treatment. like, is it not possible that this is just a naive chick? she’ll learn in time not to let no man treat her like that (hopefully) or she’ll go into porn. but just treating a chick like a ho doesnt make her a ho to me…

        • Killa K

          “shmeeze”

          hahaha

        • Killa K

          “shmeeze”

          hahaha

      • Peyso

        I agree.

        Although being a ho has alot to do with the raw number, it also has to to with how that number was reached. If you were gettin smutted out in a back alley, you’re a ho. If somebody was calling you out of ur sleep, making you walk/take a cab to their house, w/o paying for the cab, smutting you out w/ total disregard for ur sexual pleasure, then not having the decency to pay for a cab back or take u home or let u spend the night, you my friend are a shmeeze.

      • MsSula@Work

        Exactly!

      • MsSula@Work

        Exactly!

      • Killa K

        “Ho-dom is not about what you do. It’s about whether you’re receiving what you want in return for your actions.”

        I have to disagree. Your actions are a manifestation of your thoughts and who you are. Just because you got what you wanted that does not exclude you from being labeled a hoe.

        Example. If a girl has in her mind that she wants to have sex and in return she wants money. She goes out on the corner and does just that. Are you telling she’s not a ho?

      • Killa K

        “Ho-dom is not about what you do. It’s about whether you’re receiving what you want in return for your actions.”

        I have to disagree. Your actions are a manifestation of your thoughts and who you are. Just because you got what you wanted that does not exclude you from being labeled a hoe.

        Example. If a girl has in her mind that she wants to have sex and in return she wants money. She goes out on the corner and does just that. Are you telling she’s not a ho?

    • Scipio Africanus

      Wrong on all counts.

      Ho-dom is not about what you do. It’s about whether you’re receiving what you want in return for your actions.

      That is to say, ho-dom is defined as there being an imbalance in any sort of trade between two people:

      -s/he gives her what she wants, but gets none of what s/he wants back.

      This could be physical/emotional/monetary/work/time, etc.

    • What if a dude doesn’t keep a list of the women per se but a checkoff list containing the combinations of race, hair color, and body type he plans to hit in his lifetime?

      • Gem of the Ocean

        do you possess such a checklist, kam??

        • That depends… what color is your hair?

          • IVR

            “That depends… what color is your hair?”

            LOL!

          • IVR

            “That depends… what color is your hair?”

            LOL!

        • That depends… what color is your hair?

      • Gem of the Ocean

        do you possess such a checklist, kam??

      • Intellectual Hedonist

        what if said list also includes approximations of length, girth, and tricks he can do with his tongue, in a color coded excel spread sheet?

        • overit

          what if said list also includes approximations of length, girth, and tricks he can do with his tongue, in a color coded excel spread sheet?

          hofessional.

          • Killa K

            “hofessional”

            LMAO. We are in the 21st century and better make sure your list is on a hard drive.

          • Killa K

            “hofessional”

            LMAO. We are in the 21st century and better make sure your list is on a hard drive.

          • 8th Wonder

            “hofessional.”

            iDied.

          • 8th Wonder

            “hofessional.”

            iDied.

        • overit

          what if said list also includes approximations of length, girth, and tricks he can do with his tongue, in a color coded excel spread sheet?

          hofessional.

      • Intellectual Hedonist

        what if said list also includes approximations of length, girth, and tricks he can do with his tongue, in a color coded excel spread sheet?

      • Killa K

        “What if a dude doesn’t keep a list of the women per se but a checkoff list containing the combinations of race, hair color, and body type he plans to hit in his lifetime?”

        I call that a ho-mentality. :-)

      • Killa K

        “What if a dude doesn’t keep a list of the women per se but a checkoff list containing the combinations of race, hair color, and body type he plans to hit in his lifetime?”

        I call that a ho-mentality. :-)

      • Back in college, I knew a couple of guys who made bets on who can f*ck someone from each of the 50 states. I don’t think anybody won…but for some reason, I think that’s an interesting goal.

      • Back in college, I knew a couple of guys who made bets on who can f*ck someone from each of the 50 states. I don’t think anybody won…but for some reason, I think that’s an interesting goal.

    • What if a dude doesn’t keep a list of the women per se but a checkoff list containing the combinations of race, hair color, and body type he plans to hit in his lifetime?

  • Killa K

    To balance the scale, i’m going to say what I think makes a man a ho.

    If he’s ever ran a train on a woman. Ho

    If he keeps a list of the women he’s bang. Ho

    If he makes it a point to bang a woman every chance he can get. Ho

    That’s all for now

  • now that I think about it there are some acts that also “can” in certain situations be defined as a “hotivity”
    s.e.x on tape ( only if said tape is released publicly)
    multiple partner s.e.xespecially anthing that could be considered being “put on the house” “tag team” or a “train”
    anal…(this iffy its not a general consensus but most of the time it holds true)
    anytime spent as a stripper, prostitute or escort
    Frequent use of Ronnie “ho quotes”

    • Dayum!!! how you gone moderate the word “h.o” in a post about whores?

      now that I think about it there are some acts that also “can” in certain situations be defined as a “hotivity”
      s.e. x on tape ( only if said tape is released publicly)
      multiple partner s.e. x especially anthing that could be considered being “put on the house” “tag team” or a “train”
      anal…(this iffy its not a general consensus but most of the time it holds true)
      anytime spent as a stripper, prostitute or escort
      Frequent use of Ronnie “h* quotes”especially if you use them as your signature on email or cell phone texts

      • so bc you have an a**hole ex that puts your tape/pictures or whatever out there that determines your ho-status?

        • shay-d-lady

          so bc you have an a**hole ex that puts your tape/pictures or whatever out there that determines your ho-status?

          honestly I was just joking with this list..but truthfully you will probably be judged as one, right or wrong.. see Kim Kardashian

        • shay-d-lady

          so bc you have an a**hole ex that puts your tape/pictures or whatever out there that determines your ho-status?

          honestly I was just joking with this list..but truthfully you will probably be judged as one, right or wrong.. see Kim Kardashian

      • so bc you have an a**hole ex that puts your tape/pictures or whatever out there that determines your ho-status?

    • Dayum!!! how you gone moderate the word “h.o” in a post about whores?

      now that I think about it there are some acts that also “can” in certain situations be defined as a “hotivity”
      s.e. x on tape ( only if said tape is released publicly)
      multiple partner s.e. x especially anthing that could be considered being “put on the house” “tag team” or a “train”
      anal…(this iffy its not a general consensus but most of the time it holds true)
      anytime spent as a stripper, prostitute or escort
      Frequent use of Ronnie “h* quotes”especially if you use them as your signature on email or cell phone texts

    • “an*l” is ho-like behavior?

      damn, there goes my weekend foreplay

      • Intellectual Hedonist

        were you going to use the beads again? use lube with them this time and ….

      • Intellectual Hedonist

        were you going to use the beads again? use lube with them this time and ….

    • “an*l” is ho-like behavior?

      damn, there goes my weekend foreplay

  • now that I think about it there are some acts that also “can” in certain situations be defined as a “hotivity”
    s.e.x on tape ( only if said tape is released publicly)
    multiple partner s.e.xespecially anthing that could be considered being “put on the house” “tag team” or a “train”
    anal…(this iffy its not a general consensus but most of the time it holds true)
    anytime spent as a stripper, prostitute or escort
    Frequent use of Ronnie “ho quotes”

  • charli skipper

    strumpet! i thought i was the only one using that on a regular basis. VSB–spreading charli skipper approved retro-slang since…whenever.

    I have another question: Does it matter whether the person is just a plain ho vs. clingy and misunderstood?

    I have a girlfriend that has “known” every man within an 80 mile radius–seriously, we’ve had a moment where i was excited about a future date, only for her to tell me, “Keith? I “know” Keith!” AT LEAST twice. Which, considering that we don’t live in a village, is kind of remarkable-and disappointing-to me. But the point is that she is “damaged” from a recent (4 years ago) breakup, so she may or may not be a “ho”.

    And is it wrong that I consider women who have that whole, “women should be able to screw whoever, just like a man,” agenda to be hoes? I mean, I’m an enlightened modern woman but I don’t wanna be acting like no man, chexwise.

    • I don’t know about any “agenda” and I think any sentence that ends with “just like a man” is stupid, but I think that deciding you want to screw who you want, when you want doesn’t make you a ho in the least. At least not automatically.

      • charli skipper

        Okay not automatically. But I usually just assume for GP that said woman is less concerned with securing social equality for women and more concerned with defending some personal ho sh*t. Not that there’s anything wrong with that or is anybody’s business, really.

        Agenda may have been the wrong word….Maybe not….

        • Nah, I feel you. That totally happens. We all know or have heard about people like that. I was just speaking personally, as a person who has no qualms whatsoever about deciding I want to sleep with someone and then doing it. Not on some “moving the movement” ish, but just because I’m a grownup and I can make grownup choices.
          I agree, though that some people use the social equality as an excuse.

        • Nah, I feel you. That totally happens. We all know or have heard about people like that. I was just speaking personally, as a person who has no qualms whatsoever about deciding I want to sleep with someone and then doing it. Not on some “moving the movement” ish, but just because I’m a grownup and I can make grownup choices.
          I agree, though that some people use the social equality as an excuse.

        • “But I usually just assume for GP that said woman is less concerned with securing social equality for women and more concerned with defending some personal ho sh*t.”

          this sentence made me smile. i salute you.

        • “But I usually just assume for GP that said woman is less concerned with securing social equality for women and more concerned with defending some personal ho sh*t.”

          this sentence made me smile. i salute you.

      • charli skipper

        Okay not automatically. But I usually just assume for GP that said woman is less concerned with securing social equality for women and more concerned with defending some personal ho sh*t. Not that there’s anything wrong with that or is anybody’s business, really.

        Agenda may have been the wrong word….Maybe not….

      • Peyso

        I agree b/c I’ve seen women who smutted out men

      • Peyso

        I agree b/c I’ve seen women who smutted out men

    • I don’t know about any “agenda” and I think any sentence that ends with “just like a man” is stupid, but I think that deciding you want to screw who you want, when you want doesn’t make you a ho in the least. At least not automatically.

    • I have another question: Does it matter whether the person is just a plain ho vs. clingy and misunderstood?

      He.ll to the no
      sometimes murder is understandable and even justifiable… is it still murder? yes the sentence is just different….

      once you agree on a definition
      if the actions fit
      or better yet
      walks like a duck
      quacks like a duck?
      probably bumpin in some orange sauce..
      thats all I am saying

      • I have another question: Does it matter whether the person is just a plain ho vs. clingy and misunderstood?

        He.ll to the no
        sometimes murder is understandable and even justifiable… is it still murder

        good point and sh*t

      • I have another question: Does it matter whether the person is just a plain ho vs. clingy and misunderstood?

        He.ll to the no
        sometimes murder is understandable and even justifiable… is it still murder

        good point and sh*t

    • I have another question: Does it matter whether the person is just a plain ho vs. clingy and misunderstood?

      He.ll to the no
      sometimes murder is understandable and even justifiable… is it still murder? yes the sentence is just different….

      once you agree on a definition
      if the actions fit
      or better yet
      walks like a duck
      quacks like a duck?
      probably bumpin in some orange sauce..
      thats all I am saying

    • 8th Wonder

      “Which, considering that we don’t live in a village, is kind of remarkable-and disappointing-to me. ”

      This truly made me chuckle.

    • 8th Wonder

      “Which, considering that we don’t live in a village, is kind of remarkable-and disappointing-to me. ”

      This truly made me chuckle.

  • charli skipper

    strumpet! i thought i was the only one using that on a regular basis. VSB–spreading charli skipper approved retro-slang since…whenever.

    I have another question: Does it matter whether the person is just a plain ho vs. clingy and misunderstood?

    I have a girlfriend that has “known” every man within an 80 mile radius–seriously, we’ve had a moment where i was excited about a future date, only for her to tell me, “Keith? I “know” Keith!” AT LEAST twice. Which, considering that we don’t live in a village, is kind of remarkable-and disappointing-to me. But the point is that she is “damaged” from a recent (4 years ago) breakup, so she may or may not be a “ho”.

    And is it wrong that I consider women who have that whole, “women should be able to screw whoever, just like a man,” agenda to be hoes? I mean, I’m an enlightened modern woman but I don’t wanna be acting like no man, chexwise.

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