we sparked it yesterday…

v renee: Define ho. I’m curious to know, what you think makes someone a ho, besides the been around the block factor. If you’re single and grown, most are more than likely you have at least been to the corner or at least mailbox.

the champ: defining ho is more of an art than a science. its hard to explain…but you kind of just know one when you see one.

for the sake of the reply though, here’s my stab:

if the amount of sexual partners you’ve had in your life exceeds the amount of friends you’ve had, you were a ho

if every guy you’ve ever been with has had “magic stick” treatment (if they hit once, they can hit whenever they want) for years, then you were a ho

if the amount of people you’ve been with once quadruples the amount of people you’ve been with more than four times, then you were a ho

if your private parts look like the trashcan in a supermarket deli, you were a ho

slut.

ho.

tramp.

slore.

strumpet.

the rolling definition of what constitutes “ho” behavior has more conditions and variables than gem’s panty drawer a sidekick contract, a dynamic which creates myraid questions.

do sheer numbers carry the most weight? if so, how do age and circumstance factor when making this consideration?

what about specific acts/people? is ho-dum mostly defined by exactly what/who someone is willing to do, and how willing they are to do it/them?

where does the over-prioritization of sex factor in to all of this? is someone who’d drop their close friends and serious responsibilities quicker than a meth head’s twich just for the potential sniff of some ass in possession of more “ho-like” qualties than someone who merely just fits their indiscriminate boning into their daily schedule?

lastly, should any of this even matter? as long as consenting adults are mutually partaking in this behavior, why should anyone even care how many hundreds of thousands of consenting adults a person has practiced this behavior with?

anyway though, slattern hussies good people of vsb.com, how would you define ho-dom, what tangible signs (if any) are there that someone might have been running continual drawer-less marathons around the coitius block…and should it even matter?

—the champ

Filed Under: ,
Damon Young

Damon Young is the editor-in-chief of VSB. He is also a contributing editor for EBONY.com. He resides in Pittsburgh, and he really likes pancakes.

  • question

    going back to yesterday (sorry, i should’ve really posted this yesterday, but you brought it up again)… what about a reformed ho? why would a reformed ho still be dealing with ish? is there no hope for anyone who’s ever been a ho?

    • http://liffy.blogspot.com Luvvie

      “what about a reformed ho? why would a reformed ho still be dealing with ish?”

      Reformed ho? What, did they go to ho rehab or sumfin?? Do Ho-hab programs include “12 steps of building back disintegrated sugar walls”? or “How not to slob the knob of every Tom, DICK, and Hairy (balls)”? I don’t get it.

      YESSS I’m back! *pumps tiny fist*

      • Peyso

        Y r ur fist so tiny?

        • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

          LOL.

        • http://www.pbghappenings.blogspot.com PBG

          Luvvie’s fists are probably tiny because she’s tiny or used to be in a former life (like me…*eyeroll*). Small people tend to have (some) small parts. My fists are tiny and I have ears and feet the size of an average 2nd grader.

          • http://liffy.blogspot.com Luvvie

            U r right, PBG. I’m of the petite persuasion, so my fists r small. Imagine someone small w/ big hammer fists. EEWWW

            • http://www.pbghappenings.blogspot.com PBG

              I know a chick about my height and thickness (size 8) and she wears a damn 9.5 shoe!! She just looks disproportionate as all get out to me. Even though I can never find a decent shoe in my size, I’m still thankful for my size 6 feet!

      • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

        Do Ho-hab programs include “12 steps of building back disintegrated sugar walls”?

        ho-hab??

        • http://liffy.blogspot.com Luvvie

          Yes, Champie. Ho-Hab: Where legs go learn to stay closed. Where walls are rebuilt. Where most college students need to go.

          • shay-d-lady

            Yes, Champie. Ho-Hab: Where legs go learn to stay closed. Where walls are rebuilt. Where most college students need to go.

            LMAO.. yeah most freshmen curriculum includes Hodom 101

    • Gem of the Ocean

      is there no hope for anyone who’s ever been a ho?

      good question. not having been a ho, i can’t provide a testimonial.

      perhaps we can take a VSB poll:
      as a former ho, can you be the change an SO can believe in??

      • eff yo couch

        “is there no hope for anyone who’s ever been a ho?”

        First off, I think there are different types of ho’s. Growing up, my 1st encounter with a ho was the 12 year old chick on the block that humped all the ninja’s, sometimes 2 or 3 at the same time. So in this case, in order for that ho to have a chance, she would have to move to another state to get a fresh start and that’s if she’s still fresh (read: disease free and still has walls). But usually these type of ho’s start playing for the other team by the time they are 17. Why is this?

        • http://www.myspace.com/shay_d_lady79 Shay-d-lady

          But usually these type of ho’s start playing for the other team by the time they are 17. Why is this?

          maybe because they have run out of shyt and men to do? LOL I dont know but I noticed this phenom when I went to my highschool reunion a while back…

          • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

            But usually these type of ho’s start playing for the other team by the time they are 17. Why is this?

            this is actually a sign of early sexual abuse.

          • Peyso

            There a howish ways make them feel that all men aint sh*t b/c just about every men has only used them for their bodies. But many times they dont realize is that they’re the reason that all men used them for their bodies.

        • question

          lol you know me or something? after some 12-14 y/o ho-ing i moved to another state (disease free and never preggo!) and i’ve been a good girl ever since… (minus some brief college freshman ho-ishness, but haven’t we all been there? lol)

          i recently fell IN LOVE in love for the first time ever and got cheated on… BAD. this is the only time i’ve ever been cheated on — to my knowledge, but the champ’s post had me wondering… :’-(

          • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

            but the champ’s post had me wondering… :’-(

            wondering about what?

            welcome, btw and sh*t

            • V Renee

              I believe she meant wondering if the reason she was cheated on was because she’s a reformed h*e.

              • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

                thanks, v renee.

        • http://www.museacdonline.com pgh muse

          my 1st encounter with a ho was the 12 year old chick on the block that humped all the ninja’s, sometimes 2 or 3 at the same time

          i’m sorry… but i can’t call a 12 year old acting out like this a “ho”… this is a little girl who had some serious issues. poor thang.

      • Mochablast

        @Gem of the Ocean,

        Nice question…I am not a ho either HOWEVER, I do know a few. I would say that some can be reformed and some can not. I believe that it takes for a ho to hit bottom and want to change before she makes a difference. There are ho’s that have confidence problems and no self love. I think that a ho needs to deal with that inorder to want to better themselves. You can not change a Ho into a lady until they want to change.

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

      well if the prevailing notion is that you can’t turn a ho into a housewife (and i know two dudes who can prove it, convincingly) i have to wonder how you reform. aside from just going nun-al and finding Hayseuss, in which case nobody will truly believe you in the first place.

      thing is, being a ho might be akin to getting labeled something you’re not…if everybody thinks you’re a ho, then by default you’re a ho. lol. sad but true. then again, stereotypes are rooted in truth.

      i said nothing in this comment.

      • http://www.fyre08.blogspot.com Ro

        Not true… you did say something that grabbed my attention.
        thing is, being a ho might be akin to getting labeled something you’re not…if everybody thinks you’re a ho, then by default you’re a ho.

        I do not agree with you 100% on that one. B/c sometimes… The word that’s going around the block could be stemmed from jealousy or hate and not necessarily truth or any rendition of said truth. It could simply be the hyped up rantings of opinionated truth, in other words…a rumor or gossip.

        And now for my “hood-ish” example:
        If you heard from JJ who heard from June who heard from T who heard from Kisha who heard from Tiffany who heard from Peaches and nem that LaLa is a Ho, only LaLa isn’t a how and Peaches is just jealous of LaLa b/c the boy who used to be with Peaches is now with LaLa… that doesn’t make her a Ho. That just means that everybody believes that Peaches and nem’s opinionated truth is whats real when in fact, it’s just her hatin!

        Personally, my definition of what a ho is changes like my daily lunch choice. I call it like I see it and if I’m wrong, and I’m usually not, I will be woman enough to accept that I was wrong, if it happens, which it rarely does.

        I’m not a ho, never been a ho, don’t exhibit ho-like behavior. That hasn’t stopped a few rumors to be circulated about me. Do I let it bother me, a little b/c it’s my reputation that they are screwing with and I work very hard to maintain my rep as it stands. I don’t take kindly to ruining my hard work. The only reason it doesn’t bother me too much is b/c those who know me,have a pretty good idea about who I am and what I’m about. I don’t worry about it, but it does poison the minds of future friends, associates, contacts, networking possiblities, etc. etc. Which could directly/indirectly affect my finacial intake, which would mean i’d have to directly/indirectly affect your health and physical fitness. I’m not saying…. I’m just saying.

        Wow!! This was way longer than I intended… oh well!

        • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

          I’m not a ho, never been a ho, don’t exhibit ho-like behavior.

          this aint what i heard

        • http://pbghappenings.blogspot.com/ PBG

          “…If you heard from JJ who heard from June who heard from T who heard from Kisha who heard from Tiffany who heard from Peaches and nem…”

          That chick Kisha always got her name in somebody’s mouth. She keep some mess goin’ on.

          Every gossip chain or rumor ramification has a chick named “Kisha” all up and through it.

      • Intellectual Hedonist

        @PDJ,

        I have to disagree too

        I was at least 2 years younger than my high school counterparts and wasn’t even 18 till my sophomore college year, and I had mad people hating on me cause I was smart and ish…. anywho I had a horrible reputation while in high school and didn’t even know about it and I was still a virgin. YES I WAS! cause people were hating on me.

        “The word that’s going around the block could be stemmed from jealousy or hate and not necessarily truth or any rendition of said truth”

        sums up my adolescent life

      • Gem of the Ocean

        LOL @ Hayseuss

  • http://www.myspace.com/shay_d_lady79 Shay-d-lady

    I define “ho” as someone who consistently has sex with a myriad of partners with no established connection or relationship or who uses sex as a bargaining tool for material especially or emotional (sometimes) gain.
    and it is important only because the more s.e.xual partners a person has the more at risk for disease that person is but if its past behavior and all tests have come back clean…

    • http://cntrlz.wordpress.com overit

      I agree. Howeish tendencies in themselves can stem from victimization, being molested, low self esteem, and a host of other reasons-and a lot of it has to do with the mysoginist, male dominated, s*x obsessed culture we live in. Women have been led to believe they have to step out of character and engage in all sorts of f***ery to be loved, even if for a night. It is my firm belief that no woman, if given a choice, would choose to be in a casual sexual relationship, that will never amount to anything more. There are legions of empty, broken, depressed women out there because they thought they could sleep their way to happily ever after. The porn industry, music videos, unrealistic standards of beauty and Hollywood culture are all part of the larger machine of self hatred.

      I cannot tell you how many girls I know who thought that all they had to do was be a down arse chick, until the side effects of guilt and feelings of worthlessness all but consumed them and sets them on a vicious cycle (exluding reformed howes). This to me is a sign that h*-dom is not for us ladies.

      • eff yo couch

        “The porn industry. . . are all part of the larger machine of self hatred. ”

        Porn is apart of self hatred. When males watch it, they literally beat themselves up. If that ain’t self hatred, I don’t know what is

        • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

          P*rn is apart of self hatred. When males watch it, they literally beat themselves up. If that ain’t self hatred, I don’t know what is

          **snickering**

        • http://kamakula.wordpress.com kamakula

          actually, they beat themselves down

        • http://myspace.com/thomasforbes Monk

          Ironically, it’s self love also.

      • http://www.museacdonline.com pgh muse

        It is my firm belief that no woman, if given a choice, would choose to be in a casual sexual relationship, that will never amount to anything more

        I am agreeing with everything u said but this… I know plenty of women who would have casual s*xual relationships, but maybe don’t do it cuz they don’t want to be labeled a “ho”…

      • Jen

        So truuuue. Every word.

    • http://rantsofawildchild.wordpress.com ladebelle

      this is a great definition!!!

      i definitely agree with the “uses sex as a bargaining tool for material especially or emotional gain”… you’s a hoooooooooo HOOOOOOOOOO….

  • Killa K

    To balance the scale, i’m going to say what I think makes a man a ho.

    If he’s ever ran a train on a woman. Ho

    If he keeps a list of the women he’s bang. Ho

    If he makes it a point to bang a woman every chance he can get. Ho

    That’s all for now

    • http://bourgieadventures.wordpress.com LisaAngelaPamelaRenee

      Pretend like I’m stupid: why is keeping the list ho-like?

      • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

        i’m wondering this too…lol…not that i got a list or anything, i’m just saying.

      • Killa K

        I’m a little late with a response but it has a lot to do with a person’s mentality.

        Usually, if a person has only been with a handful of people they can easily remember and no not need a list. But people who keep a list fall in one of two category: 1)they plan on banging a lot of people so they start a list to keep track or 2) they’ve been with so many people that a list needs to be created. Hence a ho.

        Seriously think about it. What would drive a person to create a list of people they’ve slept with?? Am I missing other reasons?

        Note: this does not exclude people who are ho’s that do not have a list.

        BTW, I can count on one hand how many people i’ve been with and do not need a list. Hence, not a ho.

    • http://liffy.blogspot.com Luvvie

      “If he keeps a list of the women he’s bang. Ho”

      Shoot, if he’s freaked so many people that he cant even keep a list, THAT would make him ho-tastic.

      • Gem of the Ocean

        lol good point.

      • eff yo couch

        “Shoot, if he’s freaked so many people that he cant even keep a list, THAT would make him ho-tastic”

        *holds head in shame*

        • Intellectual Hedonist

          eff, hold your head high.

          this is the primary reason I don’t keep a list!

          no shame

      • Peyso

        You kinda just lowered my self esteem a little

    • http://www.thecomebackgirl.com The Comeback Girl

      im glad you wrote “he” as did chaotic diva below..im feeling that male ho-dom doesn;t have the same social stigma as female ho-dom and gets different formulas and what not.

      moreover, i really don’t care how you slice and dice those numbers in the calculator amount of sexual partners (be it with someone 1 time or 20 times) is still an important number. Can’t a man/woman be a serial commitment hoe..nevermind im going to sleep.

      • http://www.myspace.com/shay_d_lady79 Shay-d-lady

        im glad you wrote “he” as did chaotic diva below..im feeling that male ho-dom doesn;t have the same social stigma as female ho-dom and gets different formulas and what not.

        you know it is.. of course being a male h* comes with way less stigma and they tend to not have to live with long term repercussions like women do.
        That is male privilage….LOL

        • http://www.thecomebackgirl.com The Comeback Girl

          “you know it is.. of course being a male h* comes with way less stigma ”

          indeed..i just wanted to be clear about that as it related to this post. I went to school with a girl who (at our little “fireside” chat”) admitted she had 30 sexual partners at 19. She got a lot of flack for admitting that.

          but then i got to thinking about the guys our age at the time. was she only a hoe because her number exceeded her male counterparts? Does her number suggest more sex#ual freedoms and exploration that men naturally resent?

          should i take my @zz to bed (at 1:27am est)?

          • http://www.myspace.com/shay_d_lady79 Shay-d-lady

            but then i got to thinking about the guys our age at the time. was she only a hoe because her number exceeded her male counterparts? Does her number suggest more sex#ual freedoms and exploration that men naturally resent?

            I mean I think its 2 parts.. I mean the sheer number of 30 based on her age.. makes anyone a h.o..but also I have seen it in action most men will consider a woman a h.o if the number of men she admits to is either more than their number or within like 5….

          • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

            i think 30 at age 19 is a problem…hell, when i was in high school (in my more rambunctious days) my girlfriend at the time divulged to me that she’d had 10 partners by the time she got to me…lol. let’s keep in mind that we were 16 when we got together. and i know she probably slept with AT LEAST two more new people while we were together.

            needless to say, she was a ho. used up by 18. so sad.

            • http://www.thecomebackgirl.com The Comeback Girl

              “i think 30 at age 19 is a problem”

              Is 30 a problem at 30? what about for a man. I dont know I think there is a natural double standard that exists in the definition. I’m really feeling that if a woman’s sexual partner count exceeds her male counterpart she get;s the standard hoe stamp.

              • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

                there is a natural double standard, however, unless she lost her virginity at like 15, its like she hit the ground running. 30 partners for anybody by age 19 definitely qualifies one for ho-dom b/c it implies indiscriminatasticness. she couldn’t have been getting much from it…

            • http://www.museacdonline.com pgh muse

              there is a natural double standard

              i don’t think there is anything natural about the double standard… cause standards are different in every culture. Our standards in this country are purely a social construct, it’s just been this way so long that we take it as being natural.

        • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

          That is male privilage….LOL

          you’re right. it is.

          oh well

    • Scipio Africanus

      Wrong on all counts.

      Ho-dom is not about what you do. It’s about whether you’re receiving what you want in return for your actions.

      That is to say, ho-dom is defined as there being an imbalance in any sort of trade between two people:

      -s/he gives her what she wants, but gets none of what s/he wants back.

      This could be physical/emotional/monetary/work/time, etc.

      • Peyso

        I agree.

        Although being a ho has alot to do with the raw number, it also has to to with how that number was reached. If you were gettin smutted out in a back alley, you’re a ho. If somebody was calling you out of ur sleep, making you walk/take a cab to their house, w/o paying for the cab, smutting you out w/ total disregard for ur sexual pleasure, then not having the decency to pay for a cab back or take u home or let u spend the night, you my friend are a shmeeze.

        • V Renee

          Is it wrong that I love the phrase smutted out?

          • miss t-lee

            Nah…I’m thinking I may have to work this into my vocab.

          • Peyso

            No but it might be wrong if you love being smutted out.

            • http://myspace.com/thomasforbes Monk

              LOL!!

          • http://www.pbghappenings.blogspot.com PBG

            I’m kinda feeling “shmeeze” myself.

            • Gem of the Ocean

              hehe yeah “shmeeze” is a good one.

              • miss t-lee

                Me 2.
                I love new slang.

        • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

          isn’t that more just treating them like a prostitute? i mean, she may really be feeling you and not KNOW that she’s finna get the “catch a cab back home and fix me a sandwich” treatment. like, is it not possible that this is just a naive chick? she’ll learn in time not to let no man treat her like that (hopefully) or she’ll go into porn. but just treating a chick like a ho doesnt make her a ho to me…

          • Peyso

            It has to make her (or him) o h.o if she (he) allows you to do it, repeatedly.

            • http://www.museacdonline.com pgh muse

              no… it makes them either naive or afraid to loose something (you, your approval or something twisted) if they defend themselves… and what does it make u to treat someone like this?

              • 8th Wonder

                “and what does it make u to treat someone like this?”

                That my friends, is the question.

              • http://cntrlz.wordpress.com overit

                no… it makes them either naive or afraid to loose something (you, your approval or something twisted) if they defend themselves… and what does it make u to treat someone like this?

                This is why more women need to use discretion! They want something YOU have, don’t think you’re going to be invited to the party if you do it, cause you might not.

              • Peyso

                Lets say that all ppl involved are shmeezes and leave it at that

          • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

            but just treating a chick like a ho doesnt make her a ho to me…

            interesting point and sh*t

        • Killa K

          “shmeeze”

          hahaha

      • MsSula@Work

        Exactly!

      • Killa K

        “Ho-dom is not about what you do. It’s about whether you’re receiving what you want in return for your actions.”

        I have to disagree. Your actions are a manifestation of your thoughts and who you are. Just because you got what you wanted that does not exclude you from being labeled a hoe.

        Example. If a girl has in her mind that she wants to have sex and in return she wants money. She goes out on the corner and does just that. Are you telling she’s not a ho?

    • http://kamakula.wordpress.com kamakula

      What if a dude doesn’t keep a list of the women per se but a checkoff list containing the combinations of race, hair color, and body type he plans to hit in his lifetime?

      • Gem of the Ocean

        do you possess such a checklist, kam??

        • http://kamakula.wordpress.com kamakula

          That depends… what color is your hair?

          • IVR

            “That depends… what color is your hair?”

            LOL!

      • Intellectual Hedonist

        what if said list also includes approximations of length, girth, and tricks he can do with his tongue, in a color coded excel spread sheet?

        • overit

          what if said list also includes approximations of length, girth, and tricks he can do with his tongue, in a color coded excel spread sheet?

          hofessional.

          • Killa K

            “hofessional”

            LMAO. We are in the 21st century and better make sure your list is on a hard drive.

          • 8th Wonder

            “hofessional.”

            iDied.

            • http://lostwomanchild.blogspot.com blackberry molasses

              so did i… choked on my sushi

      • Killa K

        “What if a dude doesn’t keep a list of the women per se but a checkoff list containing the combinations of race, hair color, and body type he plans to hit in his lifetime?”

        I call that a ho-mentality. :-)

      • http://myspace.com/thomasforbes Monk

        Back in college, I knew a couple of guys who made bets on who can f*ck someone from each of the 50 states. I don’t think anybody won…but for some reason, I think that’s an interesting goal.

  • http://www.myspace.com/shay_d_lady79 Shay-d-lady

    now that I think about it there are some acts that also “can” in certain situations be defined as a “hotivity”
    s.e.x on tape ( only if said tape is released publicly)
    multiple partner s.e.xespecially anthing that could be considered being “put on the house” “tag team” or a “train”
    anal…(this iffy its not a general consensus but most of the time it holds true)
    anytime spent as a stripper, prostitute or escort
    Frequent use of Ronnie “ho quotes”

    • http://www.myspace.com/shay_d_lady79 Shay-d-lady

      Dayum!!! how you gone moderate the word “h.o” in a post about whores?

      now that I think about it there are some acts that also “can” in certain situations be defined as a “hotivity”
      s.e. x on tape ( only if said tape is released publicly)
      multiple partner s.e. x especially anthing that could be considered being “put on the house” “tag team” or a “train”
      anal…(this iffy its not a general consensus but most of the time it holds true)
      anytime spent as a stripper, prostitute or escort
      Frequent use of Ronnie “h* quotes”especially if you use them as your signature on email or cell phone texts

      • http://naturallyalise.blogspot.com/2008_10_01_archive.html Naturally Alise (Office Edition)

        so bc you have an a**hole ex that puts your tape/pictures or whatever out there that determines your ho-status?

        • shay-d-lady

          so bc you have an a**hole ex that puts your tape/pictures or whatever out there that determines your ho-status?

          honestly I was just joking with this list..but truthfully you will probably be judged as one, right or wrong.. see Kim Kardashian

          • http://naturallyalise.blogspot.com/2008_10_01_archive.html Naturally Alise (Office Edition)

            got ya.

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

      “an*l” is ho-like behavior?

      damn, there goes my weekend foreplay

      • Intellectual Hedonist

        were you going to use the beads again? use lube with them this time and ….

  • charli skipper

    strumpet! i thought i was the only one using that on a regular basis. VSB–spreading charli skipper approved retro-slang since…whenever.

    I have another question: Does it matter whether the person is just a plain ho vs. clingy and misunderstood?

    I have a girlfriend that has “known” every man within an 80 mile radius–seriously, we’ve had a moment where i was excited about a future date, only for her to tell me, “Keith? I “know” Keith!” AT LEAST twice. Which, considering that we don’t live in a village, is kind of remarkable-and disappointing-to me. But the point is that she is “damaged” from a recent (4 years ago) breakup, so she may or may not be a “ho”.

    And is it wrong that I consider women who have that whole, “women should be able to screw whoever, just like a man,” agenda to be hoes? I mean, I’m an enlightened modern woman but I don’t wanna be acting like no man, chexwise.

    • http://bourgieadventures.wordpress.com LisaAngelaPamelaRenee

      I don’t know about any “agenda” and I think any sentence that ends with “just like a man” is stupid, but I think that deciding you want to screw who you want, when you want doesn’t make you a ho in the least. At least not automatically.

      • charli skipper

        Okay not automatically. But I usually just assume for GP that said woman is less concerned with securing social equality for women and more concerned with defending some personal ho sh*t. Not that there’s anything wrong with that or is anybody’s business, really.

        Agenda may have been the wrong word….Maybe not….

        • http://bourgieadventures.wordpress.com LisaAngelaPamelaRenee

          Nah, I feel you. That totally happens. We all know or have heard about people like that. I was just speaking personally, as a person who has no qualms whatsoever about deciding I want to sleep with someone and then doing it. Not on some “moving the movement” ish, but just because I’m a grownup and I can make grownup choices.
          I agree, though that some people use the social equality as an excuse.

        • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

          “But I usually just assume for GP that said woman is less concerned with securing social equality for women and more concerned with defending some personal ho sh*t.”

          this sentence made me smile. i salute you.

      • Peyso

        I agree b/c I’ve seen women who smutted out men

    • http://www.myspace.com/shay_d_lady79 Shay-d-lady

      I have another question: Does it matter whether the person is just a plain ho vs. clingy and misunderstood?

      He.ll to the no
      sometimes murder is understandable and even justifiable… is it still murder? yes the sentence is just different….

      once you agree on a definition
      if the actions fit
      or better yet
      walks like a duck
      quacks like a duck?
      probably bumpin in some orange sauce..
      thats all I am saying

      • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

        I have another question: Does it matter whether the person is just a plain ho vs. clingy and misunderstood?

        He.ll to the no
        sometimes murder is understandable and even justifiable… is it still murder

        good point and sh*t

    • 8th Wonder

      “Which, considering that we don’t live in a village, is kind of remarkable-and disappointing-to me. ”

      This truly made me chuckle.

  • http://bourgieadventures.wordpress.com LisaAngelaPamelaRenee

    this is always hard to spell out clearly.
    I do not think the number of people you slept with makes you a ho (or any derivative of the word).
    I do not think that doing certain sexual acts makes you a ho.
    I think it all comes down to the person’s mindset when they’re doing those things. Like if you’re letting the football team splack in your hair and call you names and video tape it for the guys who missed it because you want them to like you, well you might be a ho (albeit a sad one). Then again, maybe you just like group sex, talking dirty, and being on camera. I dunno. Who am I to judge?

    I overheard a convo once where a couple was talking about some chick who had sex with 5 guys. she was 25. They were judging her something serious and basically called her a ho. I was sitting at the next table like “Really?” I point this out to show that what some people consider to be ho activity, others don’t. I certainly don’t think 5 at 25 is problematic. But I guess when you started makes a difference to some people. *shrug*

    • http://www.myspace.com/shay_d_lady79 Shay-d-lady

      …I disagree…sorry even if you do it because you like it and go into it willingly.. you are going into being a h.o. willingly.. not twisting the definition and making it your own. There is no way to gain power in H.O. Dom.. I think thats part of the problem with our society now.. aint no pride in being a H.O…….LOL that should be a new PSA slogan

      • http://bourgieadventures.wordpress.com LisaAngelaPamelaRenee

        that was an extreme example, but I’m not going to judge someone else’s sexual preferences just because I’m not into that particular thing.

        • postmodern pwnage

          I agree lisa angela. People are just into sexual things that mainstream society doesnt understand, so they need to label them. What is wrong if your into group sex? As long as you are mentally fit to deal with those situations, then do you i say!

          • http://www.myspace.com/shay_d_lady79 Shay-d-lady

            mainstream society doesnt understand

            this is usually the excuse when a label fits.

            but hey I am a prude and I have to live with that title..

            • postmodern pwnage

              its not an excuse, but a reality. Whether or not society should understand and condone it is up for debate. The fact that we are even having this debate demonstrates my point. Why does the sexual actions of grown individuals concern individuals who have no part in it? Maybe if we stopped being judgemental to those individuals, the rate of std infections would decrease. It did in europe! …

              I definitely understand your position, and dont think anyone should force you to respect what you call a ‘hoe’. That is your right. But just as society accepts prudes, cant we also accept the ‘hoes’?

              Maybe if it wasnt these people werent viewed so negatively, people would be more forthcoming with their past sexual behaviours. Pretending that theyre abnormal,sluts, evil, etc, wont make the problem of STDs or underage pregancies go away I think. Just means we hide it better, indulge in risque activities behind closed doors, while pointing our fingers at the ones who have the honesty to admit they love sex.

              Not that it matters, but I dont think you are a prude, and definitely understand your position.

              • http://www.myspace.com/shay_d_lady79 Shay-d-lady

                But just as society accepts prudes, cant we also accept the ‘hoes’?

                Society accepts and condemns both

                but

                Pretending that theyre abnormal,sluts, evil, etc, wont make the problem of STDs or underage pregancies go away

                I dont think we should paint it as evil or abnormal true

                but glorification of sluttacious behavior plays a big part in the social issues plaguing our society as does not being opena and honest about s.e.x period.
                I dont think we should be close minded and I dont feel that every one should be abstinent but I dont believe we should defend or glorify promiscuity.

              • Peyso

                I disagree w/ u hear ms shady lady. i dont feel that society is glorifying h.o. actions taken by women. The fact that there is such a stigma around these actions are part of the social issues that plague our society.

              • http://www.myspace.com/shay_d_lady79 Shay-d-lady

                LOL the stigma is only attached in these type conversations when we get to the labels.. but in most general circumstances and conversations that shyt is acceptable. The label is not but the actions for sure are glorified

                se

              • http:/kasondral.blogspot.com K-Swiss

                Sorry to break it to you but being a whore hasn’t a dayum thing to do with catching an STD. You can learn that from the folks that catch STDs daily from their husbands and long term mates!

                STDs is purely about WHO you sleep with, not how many. You can sleep with the same joker for 20 years and catch an STD. Trust, I know of 3 married folks that died from AIDS from their hubbies. I also know of people getting other (including incurable) STDs from long term mates..talking been together 7-8 years. If you’re screwing unprotected or even with a condom since they aren’t 100% effective you can always catch a std or get prego! Anyway, I digress.

                The term “hoe” or whatever else you call it is sooo subjective. What is the magic number that makes someone a hoe..is it 5 partners, double digit partners, how many partners one has in a year, month, week? What if I sleep with 4 guys in one week and then get boo’d up with one and stay with him and only him for the next 10 years..am I whore now?

                Unless someone is a virgin or has only slept with the person they are MARRIED to, they should never call someone a whore because its subjective. That woman that married her first boyfriend at 18 and has never been with another man in 30 years would probably call 90% of the people on this list whores lol..

      • Jen

        You’re gonna hurt people’s feelings telling all this truth.

      • http://cntrlz.wordpress.com overit

        Aint No Pride In Being A H.O. should be a bumper sticker, a fridge magnet, a t-shirt, and possibly a collector’s edition mug.

  • aja

    A reformed ho maybe able to change their ways but it will take some time for them to change the perception of others about them. As in any life changing decision, it will take time before people begin to see you differently.

    “Sexual addiction is a helluva drug!”

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

      A reformed ho maybe able to change their ways but it will take some time for them to change the perception of others about them

      honestly, the only way this can happen is if the person moves. i know of 60 year old women in my dad’s hometown (new castle, pa) who still have a rep over some stuff that happened 40 years ago, lol

      • shay-d-lady

        honestly, the only way this can happen is if the person moves. i know of 60 year old women in my dad’s hometown (new castle, pa) who still have a rep over some stuff that happened 40 years ago, lol

        LMAO yeah my granny’s beset friend is still known for her extremely wild antics .. apparently she refused to honor the Rosa parks strike cause she was on some h* shyt and refused to walk that far for some dyck but still had to have it.. LMAO

        • http://www.myspace.com/miss_kade Misskbs

          LMAO yeah my granny’s beset friend is still known for her extremely wild antics .. apparently she refused to honor the Rosa parks strike cause she was on some h* shyt and refused to walk that far for some dyck but still had to have it.. LMAO

          Wow…just wow…LMAO

      • genius khan

        new castle pa. is a small border town. i once mentioned it when u joked about opening a chain of grocery stores in pa. i joked that i had already copyrighted the name of the grocery store chain and had expanded to Akron youngstown etc.

        new castles’ a very small town where i know people. in scre scring.

        small world.

  • http://www.myspace.com/shay_d_lady79 Shay-d-lady

    DAYUM Moderation!!!!!

  • http://naturallyalise.blogspot.com Naturally Alise (Home Edition)

    I am going to put it out on the table(no pun intended unless you knew me in college), I am a reformed ho. there is such a thing, but hey I believe in unicorns too, go figure. I was a sluttacious whore from 1997-2003 which would be college and a couple years after. I had no shame, few standards, and lots of hits (like a T-Pain album)

    We know all the unforunate bad things that come out of ho-dom. (i was a safe ho fo sho, made it through with a clean bill of health) But the advantages of my past ho-dom:
    - got that wild childness out of my system
    - know exactly what I like sexually and not shy about it
    - can spot a man-whore a mile away because I have been there done that ,got the wet tshirt…

    • http://liffy.blogspot.com Luvvie

      “I am a reformed ho. there is such a thing.”

      So in ho-hab, they taught yall that first step was admitting? Well glad to see you’re 5 yrs sober, NatAl! ‘Preciate ya.

      • shay-d-lady

        So in ho-hab, they taught yall that first step was admitting? Well glad to see you’re 5 yrs sober, NatAl! ‘Preciate ya.

        Luvvie you are a dayum fool… LMAO

    • http://www.thecomebackgirl.com The Comeback Girl

      “I was a sluttacious whore from 1997-2003 which would be college and a couple years after.”

      Alise…can you bring greater level of detail besides something bout some love of unicorns and your hoe down hindsight…numbers, best locale …put it in a sonnet whatever make it good.

      • http://naturallyalise.blogspot.com Naturally Alise (Home Edition)

        things that made me a sluttacious whore:

        - no discretion for degrees of seperation of partners: “Oh that’s your roommate/cousin/friend/spades partner? Oh well…”

        - went out with the specific intent of getting sex: “Girrrrrrrrl, let’s hit the club/bbq/set/bar/spades night , I am trying to get me some tonight.” (by the way i was not alone, we travelled in packs, and i was the more modest of the crew, da*n)

        - looked at sexual patners as conquests and nothing more.

        - forgot more than my fair share of names, i am talking like within a week or two

        those are a few……. is that better Comeback Girl? lol

        • http://www.thecomebackgirl.com The Comeback Girl

          that’ll do..pardon my curiosity…i mean you just can’t drop a “GAP BAND” sluttatious bomb on me..and then not give me a painted picture.

          namaste to you and the unicorns

          • http://naturallyalise.blogspot.com Naturally Alise (Home Edition)

            i truthfully do not know the # eactly, and that right there says a lot., but let me try an equation that may lead to the apporximate college number.

            [2 x(months in a semester x 4 ) + (average of 2 summertime jumpoffs) + hoecoming* + Eagle/Aggie classic + CIAA] x 4 years

            I am going to bed……. will come to check in on the judgement and disdain tomorrow! Peace. Goodwill towards women. I’ll holla!

            *not a typo

            • http://www.thecomebackgirl.com The Comeback Girl

              “will come to check in on the judgement and disdain tomorrow”

              you won’t get none from me…everybody’s got their something-most wont tell there;s is all.

              and thats not you anymore on top of which your rooter to the tooter is a ok. the upside is you prolly know how to twirk it good (wtf did i just write lol)

              “Goodwill towards women. I’ll holla!”

              YAYA!!!!

              • http://www.igville.blogspot.com V.E.G.

                “you won’t get none from me…everybody’s got their something-most wont tell there;s is all.”

                Same here. No judgments Home Edition.

            • http://naturallyalise.blogspot.com/ eysqueen

              no judgements over here, coming from someone who used to run through the same events, hoecoming, eagle/aggie and the CIAAs.
              GO EAGLES!!!!!!! eagle pride eagle pride! oh, this isnt the forum for that. sorry. please continue…

        • http://graywords1000@yahoo.com Dorian G.

          “went out with the specific intent of getting sex: “Girrrrrrrrl, let’s hit the club/bbq/set/bar/spades night , I am trying to get me some tonight.” (by the way i was not alone, we travelled in packs, and i was the more modest of the crew, da*n)

          this is the scariest thing you wrote. So ni99as haven’t been crazy all these years when they say, if one chick in the crew is a slide, they all slides?

          • http://naturallyalise.blogspot.com/2008_10_01_archive.html Naturally Alise (Office Edition)

            naw, that aint exactly true, I am just saying when h0-sh*t was on the agenda i brought the likeminded crew, couldn’t have all that pesky judgement and common sense hampering my nights of debauchery.

          • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

            this is the scariest thing you wrote. So ni99as haven’t been crazy all these years when they say, if one chick in the crew is a slide, they all slides?

            if theyre between 18-25, this is true at least 72 percent of the time

        • http://lostwomanchild.blogspot.com/ blackberry molasses

          “went out with the specific intent of getting sex: “Girrrrrrrrl, let’s hit the club/bbq/set/bar/spades night , I am trying to get me some tonight.” (by the way i was not alone, we travelled in packs, and i was the more modest of the crew, da*n)”

          this is what is referred to as “Being on the H* Stroll”

          loving Home Edition by the way….

          and no judgement from this one either…. judge not lest ye be judged

          • Intellectual Hedonist

            “judge not lest ye be judged”

            **chanting**
            AMEN, AMEN, AAAMEN

    • Gem of the Ocean

      lol @ home edition–i’m loving the variations.

    • http://www.myspace.com/shay_d_lady79 Shay-d-lady

      am going to put it out on the table(no pun intended unless you knew me in college), I am a reformed ho. there is such a thing, but hey I believe in unicorns too, go figure. I was a sluttacious whore from 1997-2003 which would be college and a couple years after. I had no shame, few standards, and lots of hits (like a T-Pain album

      Gone then NA.. way to step up

      see this is what I am talking about. You did it own up to it and move past it being defensive to me indicates you have not yet relinquished your hotendencies….

      • miss t-lee

        ::applause::
        for Naturally Alise.

        I think we were kickin’ it (read:doing h*e ish), for about the same number of years…lol

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

      thanks for your honestly and forthcomingness.

      plus, info like this helps me with the seating arrangements at the vsb bbq

      • Peyso

        it bothers me that the vsb bbq gotta b so bougie that there is a seating arrangement and sh*t

        • http://naturallyalise.blogspot.com/2008_10_01_archive.html Naturally Alise (Office Edition)

          i was thinking that too….

        • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

          it bothers me that the vsb bbq gotta b so bougie that there is a seating arrangement and sh*t

          blame this on liz. liz is the bougie one in the crew. in fact, “liz” is arabic for “siddity”

          • overit

            blame this on liz. liz is the bougie one in the crew. in fact, “liz” is arabic for “siddity”

            since this was funny i won’t use my language skills to discount the comment;)

            LMAO, i was just telling my friend i have never heard a non-black person use siddity. i have even heard high sidditty.

            • http://lostwomanchild.blogspot.com blackberry molasses

              i have been called high siddity…. *sad face*

    • http://myspace.com/thomasforbes Monk

      “I had no shame, few standards, and lots of hits (like a T-Pain album)”

      This made me laugh.

  • Gem of the Ocean

    lastly, should any of this even matter? as long as consenting adults are mutually partaking in this behavior, why should anyone even care how many hundreds of thousands of consenting adults a person has practiced this behavior with?

    generally i try to be non-judgmental about ppl’s personal/intimate choices. so i want to say it doesn’t/shouldn’t matter what other people do in behind closed doors, on kitchen tables, against refrigerators, in whirpools, on car hoods, etc–that’s they business. however, when i do hear about the details of ho-ish extracurricular activities, it causes me to pause and give a side eye. admittedly, i can be a bit prude at times and i’d just rather not know about ppl’s indiscriminate boning. with diseases and unwanted pregnancies running rampant, it just seems unwise to not exercise more s3xual discretion.

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

      i skimmed through this and thought you said “in refrigerators”, lol. i dont know how much fun that would be

      • Gem of the Ocean

        everybody has their kinky preferences. against, in, on, next to–to each his own.

      • Intellectual Hedonist

        @ Champ, in order for it to be fun you woudl have to take everything out and honestly that just doesnt make it spontaneous anymore