One of my homeboys has a specific mantra when it comes to doling out relationship advice. Like to hear it? Here it goes:
Men should only pursue dimes; women should settle.
While I realize how ridiculous that sounds on paper, the fact is, that’s what 99 percent of all relationship books and funny looking talking heads are really saying beneath the 12-button suits, toothy grins and “I Know Obama” buttons. They tell women to keep their standards high…within reason. But you’d never tell a man that. And why should you? There’s no man “shortage”. There’s really no reason any man should be settling for anything less than what he wants. For every beautiful woman he comes across, there are at least five more equally beautiful women with as much, if not more, to offer.
Women are told to take men at face value and realize that a man is going to be a man and he’s going to keep you safe and blow your back out and make you feel like a whoa-man. And women pretty much should accept it. All the convos about men usually center around him being ready to commit and the process it takes him to get there. That’s a mighty disconnect. It states that women are ready to get married from birth and need to realize that men aren’t and should just support and accept a man as he is and love him for what he does bring to the table, not judge him for what he doesn’t. Between the justice system, the state of Arizona, and Black pride, Black men have it tough enough out here without having to prove to their women that they are worthy of time.
Th “media” has been on this like white on rice. Forget Teairra Mari and her “Sponsor” talk…she isn’t going to sell any records anyway. She needs to forget trying to find a man who takes care of her and find a man who will love her and listen to her talk about her hard days work of bringing home the bacon. At least that’s what CNN’s latest foray into the Black woman melodrama, “I Can’t Find A Man, Where Dey Be Hidin’ At Tyler Perry?” is telling them.
There is a saying that love conquers all, and for Watts that means Laurent Sagna’s salary and job status are inconsequential. She said she adores her 39-year-old blue-collar partner — who only completed high school — for the way he listens, for his affectionate hugs and musical talents. Watts ignored her mother’s concerns about his “financial prospects” when they married a few years ago.
“I’ve met and dated plenty of people with Ph.D.s, and it doesn’t mean they are smarter,” said Watts, who lives in North Carolina. “He might not have the degree, but he’s got a lot of talent.”
He’s got a lot of talent.
Forgive my guffawedness, but that sounds like some rationalization to me. Besides, what the f*ck is talent anyway? Does he whittle? Is he a great whistler? Does that really make up for the $70,000 income gap. For the record, I think you should marry whoever the f*ck you want. If they’re broke and you love them. Great. If you admire, respect, and appreciate them, great. Do you. But don’t run no bullsh*t about talent to make yourself feel better. We all understand anyway. Us menfolks aren’t graduating from college or getting the good jobs and the ones that are have already hit it and quit it.
I wonder what kind of self-realization all the women in the CNN article had to come to in order to accept being the breadwinner in their households? And was it a power struggle because society tells us that men are the ones who make the money and support the house.
However, this article lets us know that, even if you can’t support the house, brotha…you can ALWAYS find a woman who will. So why settle for anything less. Even broke and uneducated brothas can hit the jackpot. Men should only date dimes; women should settle.
I bring it to you, good folks of VSB. Ladies, do you care if you make more money and have THAT much more education than your man? Or do you only care if he cares? And fellas (yeah!), could you live with being the one who doesn’t bring home the bacon (or turkey bacon for the non-pork eaters in the room) and had you by about three degrees?
How low could you go?
-VSB P aka THE ARSONIST aka TANGLE JIG P aka GIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIRL, HE A 3