four reasons why women should rule the world…and the one reason why they don’t

Posted on 27 August, 2009 by The Champ

rocky-throne1

ever since 8th grade, when i allowed a smile and a plaid skirt to convince me to pick the ridiculously endowed and hilariously uncoordinated ericka white on my team for ultimate dodgeball, i’ve been convinced that women should and eventually would rule the world.

i envisioned a future of female omnipotence and dominion, where all the world’s men were coerced to attend “testosterone nullification” camps, and where all industry, time-travel, and farming equipment were mercilessly controlled by the fairer gender.

obviously, i was wrong, and obviously i watched too much cinemax.

16 years later, although still convinced that the world should be run by women, i finally realize why its not.

because i’m an altruist and sh*t, i want to spread my knowledge to the masses with four reasons why women should rule the world…

…and the one thing thats holding them back

1. there’s more of them where it counts

although we outnumber them on earth, women out populate us in every country that f*cking matters (look for yourself), and in any populous situation that anyone gives a damn about (college campuses, popular and safe nighttime options, entertaining television ensembles, vsb.com, etc), facts that should easily lead to their world domination and an easy justification for more threesomes

2. they live long as hell

this is an admirable trait, although i’d probably live t0 95 also if i could use all the money i saved from not having to pay for drinks, dates, or club admission fees towards better health care

3. they have a much, much, much, much greater tolerance for pain

in 2006, i dated a woman who’d get brazilian waxed on a regular basis, a sadistic process which is basically the male equivalent of allowing a rabid persian cat to claw out your pubic hairs after accidentally spilling pancake syrup and bleach on your lap. on mild days she’d run a couple laps around the highland park reservoir immediately after her appointments.

monday morning, i accidentally stuck my pinkie with a thumbtack. figuring (correctly) that it would take at least an hour for the extra-strength ibuprofen to kick in, three to get over my pain, and another three to get over the sight of my own blood, i called in a sick day. i also called my mom to pout.

4. they have special powers

while waiting for my girl outside of sushi two yesterday, i noticed a man in a business suit sprinting to a parked car a few yards away from me. inside that car was a somewhat attractive january jones doppleganger. when the guy reached the car, he pulled out what looked to be at least a couple hundred dollars and gave it to her through the window.

their convo went as follows (paraphrasing)

girl: “thanks, buddy. things have been tight recently. i really appreciate it”

guy: “any time. sorry for taking so long. i had to run to the atm on penn avenue because the one on walnut is out of order. so…what are you doing this weekend? i had some tickets to…

***girl speeds off while guy, literally still in mid-sentence, turns around and walks away***

he then shot a sh*t-eating, “yeah, i know hot chicks” grin at his buddies who were watching this entire exchange

lets forget the fact that they produce human beings, as well as their ability to dance for seven consecutive hours in eight inch nine west stilts without flinching. being able to get away with sh*t like that and have a man actually brag about it happening to him is a superf*ckinghuman ability

with their myriad advantages, there’s no apparent reason why women haven’t forced men to play the washington generals to their female harlem globetrotting onslaught. yet, after moments years of intense study, i’ve finally figured out why.

terrible marketing and public relations

thats it.

you see, the only reason why women don’t rule the world is because their gender doesn’t have a david axelrod to properly manipulate and spin critical info. this critical communication breakdown keeps them divided and allows us to stay on top.

think about it. how else can you explain that its widely believed that women can’t get along with each other, despite the fact that most of the best friendships any of us have witnessed have been between women?

how else would you account for the propaganda out there about how all the educated, successful, and attractive young black women out there can’t find mates, even though all of the educated, successful, and attractive young black women i personally know have to literally beat worthy candidates and contenders off with a stick? (and i live in freakin pittsburgh!!!)

you know, i can only think of one way to finally rectify this.

as my greatest crime-fighting endeavor yet, i, the champ, am throwing my hat in the ring.

i’m formally applying for the position of female earthling public relations specialist.

i’d like to see how the world would change if the women of earth had a karl rove in their corner. plus, it’s a recession and i have an english degree and several years of blogging experience. this would be the only open job in the country i’m actually qualified to do.

pay the 8th grade champ back for picking wack-ass ericka white and help hire me, please. you won’t regret it

—the champ

http://ThinkPrettySmart.typepad.com Ms. Smart

Our PR doesn’t suck. Y’all just have better PR. And I suspect your PR team is headed by…a woman. Turn-coat heffa!
- http://ThinkPrettySmart.typepad.com Ms. Smart
  
  @Ms. Smart, And I’ll add that y’all lured her away with perks that include, but aren’t limited to, a corner office, multiple homes with excessive square footage, weekly spa appointments, etc., etc., etc.! Oh shyt! Y’all have Oprah on your team!
- overitnomore!
  
  @Ms. Smart, lol @ turn-coat heffa.
- http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ
  
  @Ms. Smart,
  
  Our PR doesn’t suck. Y’all just have better PR
  
  which means that, compared to our pr, your pr sucks. case closed
  - http://ThinkPrettySmart.typepad.com Ms. Smart
    
    @The Champ, Dude! Y’all got OPRAH on your team. We can’t go against her! Hell!!!
    - http://ravingblacklunatic.blogspot.com Big Man
      
      @Ms. Smart,
      
      I also always believed that female PR was the truth.
      
      Y’all seem to spin every argument to make yourselves right, regardless of facts or logic.
      
      Y’all regularly sell ninjas a false image of who you are inside and out, despite us knowing the game is coming.
      
      Finally, women continue to convince wealthy men to marry them without pre-nuptial agreements, despite the fact that this ninjas KNOW it’s all game.
      
      Hello Nas, I’m looking at you.
      - http://ThinkPrettySmart.typepade.com Ms. Smart
        
        @Big Man, Darn. You called NAS out directly. You ain’t right.
http://www.awesomelyluvvie.com Luvvie

If I ruled the world, I’d order the following decrees (a la Professor Humbridge):

*All men w/ Taco Meat chesticle hair have to be held down for regular waxings

*Hairhats have to come from the finest Asian lady’s head (when she gets her hair cut by choice, of course), not from Detroit horse tails

*Any man caught cheating will be subjected to 1 hour (per day he cheats) of a naked Roseanne on TV. The knowing OTHER woman will be banned from buying new shoes for 1 month per day

*Universal rice-care for EVERYONE. YOU get rice. and YOU get rice.

Hmm… I’ll be back with more decrees

*Oh and leggings wont come in a size 20 and up. And if they do, they will come with a long shirt attached.
- http://lostwomanchild.blogspot.com blackberry molasses
  
  @Luvvie,
  
  Hard to rule the world from your permanent perch in the IG Corner….
  - http://myspace.com/shatani shatani
    
    @blackberry molasses,
    
    if anyone can make it happen, its this one!
    - overitnomore!
      
      @shatani, hayyyy booooo! i need to ask bbmo and southerngirl what the glitter protocol is. i feel you should get at least one shooting star, its been a long time! you shouldn’t have left us, unamused and shatani-less;)
      - SouthernGirl
        
        @overitnomore!,
        
        i approve this message.
        
        SG *stamp* of approval. notarized *shooting gold stars*
    - Gem of the Ocean
      
      @shatani,
      
      yeah shat. welcome back & sh*t.
      - http://lostwomanchild.blogspot.com BlackBerry Molasses
        
        @Gem of the Ocean,
        
        **giggling like an 11 yr old at shat and sh*t**
        
        I need more coffee.
    - http://www.awesomelyluvvie.com Thuggie Luvvie
      
      @shatani,
      
      HEY GURL!! U’ve been missed ’round this place
    - http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ
      
      @shatani,
      
      welcome back, shat and sh*t
      - http://www.awesomelyluvvie.com Thuggie Luvvie
        
        @The Champ,
        
        ok “shat and sh*t” just made me cackle. Am I 4?
  - http://www.awesomelyluvvie.com Thuggie Luvvie
    
    @blackberry molasses,
    
    Hey! I can rule the world from my IG Corner. Alls I need our IG ambassadors to do my will on the outside. Ya dig?
    - http://lostwomanchild.blogspot.com BlackBerry Molasses
      
      @Thuggie Luvvie,
      
      I dig…
      **summons ePosse that’s out on parole**
      - overit
        
        @BlackBerry Molasses, you called?
      - http://www.awesomelyluvvie.com Thuggie Luvvie
        
        @BlackBerry Molasses,
        
        LOL @ Overit hearing the ePosse bird call
- http://thismayconcernyou.com thismayconcernyou
  
  @Luvvie,
  
  On the leggings thing: I swear to you that I saw a hippopotamus in fishnet leggings at the club about a month ago. Scariest thing I’ve seen since the Thriller video came out.
  - http://www.awesomelyluvvie.com Thuggie Luvvie
    
    @thismayconcernyou,
    
    See?? That is just uncouth! Just cuz its in ur size dont means its for YOUR SIZE!
  - miss t-lee
    
    @thismayconcernyou,
    She was violating the team chunk rules and regulations.
  - http://lostwomanchild.blogspot.com BlackBerry Molasses
    
    @thismayconcernyou, Lawd…. WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!
    
    Minds eye… scarred and deformed (no Emperor Palpatine).
- overitnomore!
  
  @Luvvie, a la Professor Humbridge, good one! lol.
  
  i love rice. also, hairhats must come from bollywood, period.
  - http://myspace.com/shatani shatani
    
    @overitnomore!,
    
    im upset about the misspell though. hmph!
  - http://www.awesomelyluvvie.com Thuggie Luvvie
    
    @overitnomore!,
    
    Yes!!! Indian Remy hurr is that good kind. Yes. I approve this.
- http://nianaturally.blogspot.com insomN.I.A.
  
  @Luvvie,
  
  love the HP reference!
- miss t-lee
  
  @Luvvie,
  *singing* Rice, rice , and mo’ rice!!!!
- http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ
  
  @Luvvie,
  
  *All men w/ Taco Meat chesticle hair have to be held down for regular waxings
  
  you touch my chest waves and you die
- http://www.sistersoundoff.blogspot.com Cheekie
  
  @Luvvie,
  
  Luvvie for President of the Universe. Rice we can! Rice we CAN!
  - http://www.awesomelyluvvie.com Thuggie Luvvie
    
    @Cheekie,
    
    You can be my campaign manager, just for coming up w/ that awesome slogan!
    
    “Rice We Can 2012!”
    - http://www.sistersoundoff.blogspot.com Cheekie
      
      @Thuggie Luvvie,
      
      Honored.
    - overit
      
      @Thuggie Luvvie, yall gon bring on condoleeza, and you know who she rolls with.
      - http://www.awesomelyluvvie.com Thuggie Luvvie
        
        @overit,
        
        You can be the Head of Hijab HoSh*t for the campaign. Whatcha think?
- CrissieD
  
  @Luvvie,
  Lets knock that down to a size 12.
http://thismayconcernyou.com thismayconcernyou

“and obviously i watched too much cinemax.”

Somehow, I knew I wasn’t the only kid up watching that movie at 3 a.m.

*goes back to reading*
- http://stuffghettopeoplelike.wordpress.com Stuff Ghetto People Like
  
  @thismayconcernyou, Cinemax and Showtime was where it was at up until you had access to tapes.
- miss t-lee
  
  @thismayconcernyou,
  “Somehow, I knew I wasn’t the only kid up watching that movie at 3 a.m. ”
  
  Nope! LOL
  Good ol’ Skinamax…at least that’s what we used to call it.
- http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ
  
  @thismayconcernyou,
  
  what was your favorite series? i was partial to emmanuelle
  - http://thismayconcernyou.com thismayconcernyou
    
    @The Champ,
    
    I don’t remember any of them by name. But I do recall names when people mention them. Like Emmanuelle… I remember knowing to stop when I saw that name come on my screen…
    - http://stuffghettopeoplelike.wordpress.com Stuff Ghetto People Like
      
      @thismayconcernyou, especially when it was that dark one.
    - http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ
      
      @thismayconcernyou,
      
      actually, i think emmanuelle and lady chatterly’s lover where the only movies they’d actually show. i dont think anyone noticed though because both of those series went to like 80
http://www.sonicstorm.com Anechoic

Why don’t women rule the world? Because in moments of weakness, they hook up with men like this, this, this and this.
- http://thismayconcernyou.com thismayconcernyou
  
  @Anechoic,
  
  Somehow, that links like an arse whooping or three waiting to happen.
- Madame Zenobia
  
  @Anechoic,
  OK, I couldn’t open the first ‘this”. However, I’ll say word to #2. In #3′s defense – he did get hustled by Ms. Givens and to #4 – (RIP) he’s off that narcotic.
  - 8th Wonder
    
    @Madame Zenobia,
    
    *DEAD* @ he’s off that narcotic.
    
    Lord, take me to glory!
- http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ
  
  @Anechoic,
  
  lol, so we get a pass for hooking up with this
  
  ***imagine i placed a link to octomom or nette cole where “this” is***
  - Me fail english?, the runaway slave
    
    @The Champ,
    
    lol@ imagine I placed a link.
    
    LAZY!
    - http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ
      
      @Me fail english?, the runaway slave,
      
      lazy deez
      - Me fail english?, the runaway slave
        
        @The Champ,
        
        They are, aren’t they. Tsk, tsk.
http://thismayconcernyou.com thismayconcernyou

I’d also like to add a second reason as to why women don’t rule the world:

Because they somehow fall for the man’s superpower of making them believe No. 3 (The pain of a Brazilian) is absolutely necessary. That a man can get a women to inflict such pain (add the pain caused by stilettos, eyebrow arching, hair braiding and everything else women do to look good to please men) upon herself is a voodoo mind trick that women have not yet remedied.
- http://pursuitofpleasure.wordpress.com Jac
  
  @thismayconcernyou,
  
  You do always make some of the most valid points…but I need to find out where these men are that are making these women feel this way and bump them both in the head.
  
  I, for one, have always been told Brazilians are only if I wanted them. And any man who doesn’t want it how it is can get it elsewhere…but then again…it’s not as easy for men to get the goods as it is for us…SO…maybe it’s because of a few bad women we’re losing it out…
  
  *pondering in bed*
- http://stickwithyocat.blogspot.com/ V.E.G.
  
  @thismayconcernyou,
  
  “fall for the man’s superpower of making them believe No. 3 (The pain of a Brazilian)”
  
  You assume that women get Brazillians for some man. I do mine (yes I do my own Brazillians) cuz I want to. I dated a dude who didn’t care for them and…did I stop? No. He got used to it.
  - I wish I was a girl :(
    
    I would totally get one and cry like a baby cuz I’m a guy. I agree with the following quote:
    
    Girls can do anything boys can do better, and in heels!
- Me fail english?, the runaway slave
  
  @thismayconcernyou,
  
  I have to agree with the ladies above me and say I’ve yet to witness a man having to convince a woman to visit Rio. I go to Rio for the same reason I put on lotion everyday on every part of my exposed skin. Cause I like to look my best even under my clothes. It also makes “her” smooth to the touch. Further, it doesn’t hurt as much as you guys make it sound. They put blue stuff on “her” afterwards (aaahhh) that tingles so nicely it makes the whole thing worthwhile. Plus, I like to be pampered in any form. Hair, nails, wax. I can do this all at home but I prefer to be serviced.
  
  As far as the shoes and eyebrows, most of the men I know notice high heel vs. no high heel, but rarely appreciate the details, brands etc. I do it more for other women to compliment me. When other women on the street give you random compliments, that’s when you KNOW you did that.
  - http://pursuitofpleasure.wordpress.com Jac
    
    @Me fail english?, the runaway slave,
    
    Thank you for the way you so eloquently expressed that! I know just in a few short minutes I am about to do some thangs…and when I step out the door I’ll be looking fab…under the clothes too…and it’s for me!
  - Gem of the Ocean
    
    @Me fail english?, the runaway slave,
    
    I do it more for other women to compliment me.
    
    you betta tell it, e-bff!!!! most of the OUTWARD appearance stuff woman do is for other women. by nature (or conditioning, perhaps?) women like to compete with each other. granted, many woman don’t to walk around with caterpillars on her forehead wearing beat-down birkenstocks on pebble-kicking feet for fear they won’t pull a man. but generally, we want to be able to look ourselves in the mirror and say “damn, chick, you are FLY”
  - Sula
    
    @Me fail english?, the runaway slave,
    
    Pretty much.
    
    I think one reason men rule the world (or do they?) is because they are capable of those broad, sweeping generalizations that most of us can’t do.
    - Me fail english?, the runaway slave
      
      @Sula,
      
      Word!
      
      Logic deez, ninjas!
- Lanieanna
  
  @thismayconcernyou,
  
  THE WHOLE WAXING THING…. Let’s be realistic and consider that we are addressing a mostly African American bunch here… I wax, because I live in the south, and its HOTT! Also, at the age of 17, the very first time I shaved I got a hair bump! I wasted a 30 dolla co-pay and suffered through embarressment and ultimate humilation because I swore to god my boyfriend gave me the HERP! And…. me being the head hunter that I am…… It’s just cunnilingus friendly
  - Me fail english?, the runaway slave
    
    @Lanieanna,
    
    lol@ “head hunter”
  - http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ
    
    @Lanieanna,
    
    Let’s be realistic and consider that we are addressing a mostly African American bunch here
    
    so you’re saying that sistas are naturally bushier down there?
    - Sula
      
      @The Champ,
      
      so you’re saying that sistas are naturally bushier down there?
      
      See generalizations? I might be onto something with my theory…
    - Lanieanna
      
      @The Champ,
      
      No! LOL! I am not sure of the level of
      bushy-ness of all sistahs in referance to the love below. Although I happen to have a softer texture, and a less curly and corse grade of hair due to my bi-racial heritage… A lot of us, of African decent may suffer from sensative skin and hair bumps…. I am sure you guys have see ole’ boy with the massive break out on his face, or the back of his neck, because he can’t take a razor… Can you imagine the Mighty Katrina Disaster and absolute buzz kill if you saw that on the private parts of your 38-26-40 lady friend???
overitnomore!

great post! women don’t rule the world because we aren’t evil. period. we are the better, nicer, more compassionate half. which leads me to karl rove-NO, axelrod, sure.
- http://stuffghettopeoplelike.wordpress.com Stuff Ghetto People Like
  
  @overitnomore!, FOH@ “nicer, compassionate, not evil”…because in the dating world (and custody battles), women are stick-up kids without guns.
  - http://lostwomanchild.blogspot.com blackberry molasses
    
    @Stuff Ghetto People Like,
    
    we ARE nicer, compassionate… yadda yadda… just don’t pi$$ us off. DUH
    - http://www.sistersoundoff.blogspot.com Cheekie
      
      @blackberry molasses,
      
      Exactly. Women are like Leos. We love to give, but don’t you DARE take from us. Men, any subsequent evil reaction is thusly your fault…your doing.
  - http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ
    
    @Stuff Ghetto People Like,
    
    because in the dating world (and custody battles), women are stick-up kids without guns.
    
    so basically, a woman on the dating scene is omar little with lipgloss?
    - http://theothersideofphlyy.blogspot.com PhlyyGirl
      
      @The Champ,
      Omar definitely wore lip gloss…Imjustsayin….
      
      And what makes you think women don’t already rule the world?
      We just let you silly lil men folk think ya’ll got things on lock. Sometimes it’s the things you don’t see that hold more weight.
      Ya’ll go kill the beast and bring him home for the women to cook, but you BRING IT BACK! You don’t dare eat it out in the woods where you kill it, or you know you’ll be staying in the woods for awhile until you bring SOMETHING back in the cave….
  - overitnomore!
    
    @Stuff Ghetto People Like, i’m not going anywhere, lol. its true. deal.
  - Me fail english?, the runaway slave
    
    @Stuff Ghetto People Like,
    
    I’m still tryna figure out what you mean. You havent come across any ruthless, insensitive men who date?
    - http://stuffghettopeoplelike.wordpress.com Stuff Ghetto People Like
      
      @Me fail english?, the runaway slave, last time I checked, I had no reason to date another dude. Chances of me finding one are right up there with Nike making spiked stiletto heels for men.
      - http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ
        
        @Stuff Ghetto People Like,
        
        LOL
      - http://www.sistersoundoff.blogspot.com Cheekie
        
        @Stuff Ghetto People Like,
        
        “Chances of me finding one are right up there with Nike making spiked stiletto heels for men.”
        
        BWAHAHAHA. I know you said “men”, but let’s be technical here while I ask: Andre Leon Talley hasn’t created these yet?
      - Me fail english?, the runaway slave
        
        @Stuff Ghetto People Like,
        
        Who said you had to date them? I said “come across” and you took that to mean “had a romantic interest in”?
        
        Reason # 1081 why it makes no sense for men to be running the world. You’re so busy worrying about being perceived as gay that simple reading comprehension escapes you.
      - http://stuffghettopeoplelike.wordpress.com Stuff Ghetto People Like
        
        @Me fail english?, the runaway slave, yep, so much so that I had to word the snark *just* right.
        
        On the serious tip though, my circle contains fairly reasonable cats…the only one I know who talks a good one about being hard on chicks is booed up with a 2520 nine years his senior.
http://nianaturally.blogspot.com insomN.I.A.

Women don’t rule the world b/c men have jedi mind tricked us into believing that we are too emotional, irrational, and illogical to run this town tonight. All the while, they are starting unilateral wars, raping women and girls belonging to other ethnic groups, committing genocide, bringing semi-automatic weapons to town halls with the POTUS, and a whole history book of other obviously rational, logical, and thoughtful shyt.
- Madame Zenobia
  
  @insomN.I.A.,
  Completely co-signing.
  - Gem of the Ocean
    
    @Madame Zenobia,
    
    me too. twice.
- http://myspace.com/shatani shatani
  
  @insomN.I.A.,
  
  Amen!
- Me fail english?, the runaway slave
  
  @insomN.I.A.,
  
  AMEN! It makes me a very sad panda when women buy into this BS and propagate like its gospel truth. Buncha Benedict Arnolds.
  - Deviant
    
    @Me fail english?, the runaway slave,
    
    Its sexual harrassment panda!
    - Me fail english?, the runaway slave
      
      @Deviant,
      
      *DEAD*
- http://lmbao.org Dorian G.
  
  @insomN.I.A.,
  
  When you guys can dunk consistently then you can worry about us, till then stay thirsty my friends
  - Me fail english?, the runaway slave
    
    @Dorian G.,
    
    lol! I’ma have to put this consistent dunk thing to the test at the VSB BBQ.
    - http://lmbao.org Dorian G.
      
      @Me fail english?, the runaway slave,
      
      All I see is you talking, and not organizing. Make it happen summer is almost over
      - http://lostwomanchild.blogspot.com BlackBerry Molasses
        
        @Dorian G.,
        
        not her job
        
        **o_O at Champale/ Panamaniac**
      - http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ
        
        @blackberry molasses.,
        
        job deez
      - http://lostwomanchild.blogspot.com BlackBerry Molasses
        
        @Champ
        
        I done told you before… you can’t afford my services.
        
        Now, *dismissive wave* move along.
      - Me fail english?, the runaway slave
        
        @Dorian G.,
        
        I said Sept. 19th now find me a park outside of DC or Phila ~~and give me all your money~~ and give me your email
        
        @BBMo,
        
        You know if you wanna get smthg done right you give it to a woman
      - http://www.museacdonline.com pgh muse
        
        @Me Fail., **stroking chin**
        
        hmmmm… Sept. 19th is the day this Muse was borned into the world… it would be interesting to spend it with the VSPs.
      - Me fail english?, the runaway slave
        
        @pgh_muse,
        
        Awww isht! Free shots on Me Fail in honor of the ED’s BDay
        
        *plays “Isnt She Lovely”*
      - http://lmbao.org Dorian G.
        
        @Me fail english?, the runaway slave,
        
        My email is linked to my name
  - Sula
    
    @Dorian G.,
    
    till then stay thirsty my friends
    
    I want to marry this dude. Lol!
- http://presidentialtelevisionandfilm.ning.com Monk
  
  @insomN.I.A.,
  
  This is proof that y’all’s PR sucks.
  - http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ
    
    @Monk,
    
    lol, yeah. it really is. i should edit this entry and paste that sh*t in there
    - http://nianaturally.blogspot.com insomN.I.A.
      
      @The Champ,
      i agree, and you have my full endorsement, Champ. You can start with the marginaliztion of black women leaders during the civil rights movement and work your way forward.
      - Me fail english?, the runaway slave
        
        @insomN.I.A.,
        
        That girl GOOODD!!!
      - http://www.awesomelyluvvie.com Thuggie Luvvie
        
        @insomN.I.A.,
        
        Yeah. Ella Baker got hosed
- Sula
  
  @insomN.I.A.,
  
  I think you should be insomNIAc more often, because this right there is wisdom!
- http://open.salon.com/blog/hipployta Siobhan means Woman of Wisdom
  
  @insomN.I.A.,
  
  CO-SIGN
  
  *Places a 100% sticker on post*
http://pursuitofpleasure.wordpress.com Jac

But then…before I go..let me say…we don’t have bad PR reps..it’s that your PR rep is willing me be slightly dirtier in the name of men don’t gossip, cheat or steal AND since it’s prolly a man (I gotta disagree with the above) he’s covering for the sheistyness.

OK..I can’t think straight…none of what I said makes sense.

I’ma try this again in the morning (if it does make sense let me know)
- http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ
  
  @Jac,
  
  we don’t have bad PR reps..it’s that your PR rep is willing me be slightly dirtier in the name of men don’t gossip, cheat or steal AND since it’s prolly a man
  
  what good is a pr rep if they’re not willing to go the extra mile to get the job done
pe. riche.

How the hell did you know that we use the money we save from not having to pay for nights out on health care?! /sarcasm.

We don’t rule the world because we don’t know our worth. We often fail to realize that for the simple fact of being born a woman is amazing within itself. I think if we all paused for a moment to realize how powerful we are, then we could run the world in the way it should be.

This maybe candid, but what other living being you know can bleed for five to seven days every single month of the year and not only stay alive, yet still continue life as if nothing is wrong?
- http://lostwomanchild.blogspot.com blackberry molasses
  
  @pe. riche.,
  This maybe candid, but what other living being you know can bleed for five to seven days every single month of the year and not only stay alive, yet still continue life as if nothing is wrong?
  
  You just left it wide open for that South Park quote…. didn’t ya?
  
  And we’ll continue to live, and pretend nothing is wrong while CUSSIN Eve out and waiting to make it past the Pearly Gates so that she can get a stern ‘talking to’.
  
  Everything is NOT fine when I can’t get down with the southside slippery slide for 5 days. HMPH!
- http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ
  
  @pe. riche.,
  
  “This maybe candid, but what other living being you know can bleed for five to seven days every single month of the year and not only stay alive, yet still continue life as if nothing is wrong?”
  
  the economy during the bush years
  - Humble_One aka Field Ninja
    
    @The Champ,
    
    That was a good one. You can also throw Hip-Hop post 1997 in their also.
http://stuffghettopeoplelike.wordpress.com Stuff Ghetto People Like

a man in a business suit sprinting to a parked car a few yards away from me. inside that car was a somewhat attractive january jones doppleganger. when the guy reached the car, he pulled out what looked to be at least a couple hundred dollars and gave it to her through the winow.

their convo went as follows (paraphrasing)

girl: “thanks, buddy. things have been tight recently. i really appreciate it”

guy: “any time. sorry for taking so long. i had to run to the atm on penn avenue because the one on walnut is out of order. so…what are you doing this weekend? i had some tickets to…

***girl speeds off while guy, literally still in mid-sentence, turns around and walks away***

He should have been dragged out into the street and smoked for that…nah nah, scratch that, do it Inglorious Basterds-style: call the Bear Jew on his *ss and then scalp him….because he’s single-handedly f*ckin’ the game up.

Money does not go in the hands of unappreciative women…PERIOD.
- http://lmbao.org Dorian G.
  
  @Stuff Ghetto People Like,
  
  Can you blame him tho? I think we’ve all been that dude, and a lot of us are still that dude and don’t know it.
  - Humble_One aka Field Ninja
    
    @Dorian G.,
    
    Yes we can blame him. That behavior is excusable when you are a teen. Once your 21 and older there is no excuse for such behavior. Man Law Article 1 Section 215.
  - http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ
    
    @Dorian G.,
    
    Can you blame him tho? I think we’ve all been that dude, and a lot of us are still that dude and don’t know it.
    
    yeah, its amazing the lengths some of us (myself included) have gone to just be in the presence of an attractive woman. i mean, just last weekend i didn’t even charge this banging ass chick for washing my truck.
  - http://stuffghettopeoplelike.wordpress.com Stuff Ghetto People Like
    
    @Dorian G. and The Champ, for me, I don’t care how bad a chick is, we have to be regular chex mix buddies and she has to be good for that kinda cash. I have a shamelessly low tolerance for women asking me for money. Only wifey gets a pass…
    - http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ
      
      @Stuff Ghetto People Like,
      
      i don’t think we’re saying that it goes as far as what ole boy did yesterday, just that most of us give attractive women certain allowances just because they’re attractive women.
      - http://stuffghettopeoplelike.wordpress.com Stuff Ghetto People Like
        
        @The Champ, yeah, I’ll give you a date with a chick who’s girlfriend material…you’ll take her to a more special place than some boogerwolf. But attraction is no object when it comes to being stuck up for X amount of cash at random. She needs to build up goodwill to have me just giving her money.
- http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ
  
  @Stuff Ghetto People Like,
  
  ummm…please try not to make any more Basterds references until i actually see the movie.
  
  thanks and sh*t
  - http://stuffghettopeoplelike.wordpress.com Stuff Ghetto People Like
    
    @The Champ, don’t trip, wasn’t a story giveaway…just a character reference. But we gotta get the trend started sometime.
  - Sula
    
    @The Champ,
    
    I concur! But this little handicap shall be remedied to this week-end. Can’t wait!
- http://open.salon.com/blog/hipployta Siobhan means Woman of Wisdom
  
  @Stuff Ghetto People Like,
  
  Hmm, well I have a self-admitted crush on the Bear Jew, for the manner in which he beats Nazis to death, but I can’t co-sign on this.
  
  Dude wants to be a lame…let him be a lame.
  - http://stuffghettopeoplelike.wordpress.com Stuff Ghetto People Like
    
    Would VSB be willing to provide a Basterds discussion in a couple of weeks (similar to the Black In America entries)?
    
    Anyways, @Siobhan means Woman of Wisdom, you only say that because suckers like him benefit y’all. Same women who got the nerve to get mad when nymphos benefit us.