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four completely practical and non-racist reasons why i never have and most likely never will date a white woman

this was so unexpected, jamal. how did you know i always wanted the 'good times' dvd boxset?
this was so unexpected, jamal. how did you know i always wanted the ‘good times’ dvd boxset?

6.  as of monday, november 30th, 2009, i’ve officially filed “since i’m not a billionaire, i don’t think i’d have any chance of getting the benefit of the doubt if any random legal mess occurred” as reason #137 on the champ’s list of “137 completely practical and non-racist reasons why i never have and most likely never will date a white woman

—the last random thought listed in yesterdays ‘six things i’ve thought about tiger woods, elin nordegren, and golfgate’.

although the tone of my writing might occasionally paint a different picture, i actually don’t dislike white women at all, and i really appreciate a few of their unique talents.

they gave us natalie portman and the best teacher i ever had (r.i.p., sister roberta). they also usually make for great senators, copy-editors, and baristas, and no one is better at running “corporate game” (the ability to use office politics and mores to their benefit) than a professional white woman. in fact, some of my best friends have friends who know people who have married them.

despite this, i wasn’t using any hyperbole yesterday when i mentioned having “137 completely practical and non-racist reasons why i never have and most likely never will date one”. although actually having 137 reasons why you havent dated someone of a different race seemingly contradicts the whole “non-racist” thing, this list is comprised of more personal quirks and odd idiosyncrasies than anything else

while time and space and liz prevent me from naming all 137, i’ve decided to share four of them today.

reason #37: i’m a context snob

everybody is allowed at least one somewhat shallow relationship deal-breaker. for me, it’s a woman not understanding certain simple pop cultural references and allusions, because that forces me to either always provide context or just completely shutter like 40 percent of my daily lexicon

since this is true, i can’t even imagine how turned off i’d be if i always had to explain why i never learned how to swim or why none of us know the second verse of “lift ev’ry voice and sing” or why grape kool-aid goes better with steak and fries than red. 

reason #71: the approaching conundrum, part 1

a bi-product of my belief that women shouldn’t romantically pursue men is the dozens of “random things to say to spark interest” bagging techniques i’ve picked up over the years.

thing is, these techniques were learned through 15-18 years of exclusively approaching sistas, and i’m not sure how well they would translate. i mean, how would tried and true conversation starters like “damn. that dress really complements your skin” or “hey, didnt i see you on the alpha boat ride last month?” or “f*ck beyonce” work with a white woman? i’d have absolutely nothing left to say

but, what if an attractive white woman actually approaches you?“, i hear you asking, a question that leads us to…

reason #72: the approaching conundrum, part 2

from what i’ve seen, the type of white woman who is bold enough to publicly approach and romantically pursue a black man usually isn’t attracted to black guys like me. while i’m plenty pretty and definitely black, they tend to go for guys who are either a bit “blacker” (ie: cent, 50 or jackson, panama), or prettier (ie: moore, shemar or williams, wendy)

reason #106: i can be a bit of an over-neurotic b*tch

basically, if you’re the type of guy who’d stress about giving your seat on the bus to a standing young white woman because you didn’t want to rest of the predominately black bus to think that you were a “only giving seats to pretty white women ass” n*gga, publicly dating and sporting one probably isn’t the best idea for you

anyway, people of vsb, we’ve talked before about interracial dating and whether we’ve done it, are currently doing it, or wouldn’t mind eventually doing it, but we’ve never really explored the why.

im curious: what has shaped your personal feelings regarding interracial couplings, and why exactly do you feel that way?

we’re all family and sh*t. don’t be scared to share

—the champ

Damon Young

Damon Young is the editor-in-chief of VSB. He is also a contributing editor for EBONY.com. He resides in Pittsburgh, and he really likes pancakes.

  • http://www.twitter.com/Bryant_the_HNIC Bwill

    O_O Alpha boat rides!? #wheredeydodatat….Somebody sign a brotha up

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

      @Bwill,

      i thought the yearly alpha boat ride was a ubiquitous event. who knew?

      welcome and sh*t, btw

      • http://cookinwitgrease.com chasdizz

        @The Champ,
        in my neck of the woods it’s a kappa boat ride. interesting….

        • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

          @chasdizz, where i live the drug dealers do the big one in honor of Rayful Edmonds.

        • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

          @chasdizz, where i live the drug dealers do the big one in honor of Rayful Edmunds.

          • Me fail english?

            @Panama Jackson,

            lol. ghetto ass…

        • http://musicmakesmehigh.wordpress.com Reecie

          @chasdizz, and where I’m from its the Que Boat Ride. lol.

      • Me fail english?

        @The Champ,

        I’m still tryna figure out how the Alpha boat ride always manages a 15:1 female:male ratio. Are there any actual Alphas on the boats?

        • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

          @Me fail english?,

          ive never actually been on one, so i dont know. but, considering the usual male/female ratios at other black greek events ive been at, its not surprising

    • Caballeroso

      @Bwill,

      When I was on the yard @ SU in Baton Rouge, we did an Alpha boat ride together with the AKA’s to honor our newly crowned Ms. Black & Gold. Don’t know if this phenomenon still occurs or not.

      • ComicBookGuy

        @Caballeroso,

        What up, 6? An Alpha boat ride sounds like a joyous occasion.

        • Caballeroso

          @ComicBookGuy,

          Indeed, 6. Indeed!

          • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

            @Caballeroso,

            hey, there will be no “inside lingo that the champ doesnt understand” on vsb

          • ComicBookGuy

            @The Champ,

            LOL

  • http://thismayconcernyou.com thismayconcernyou

    Reason No. 37 is all-encompassing.

    I can’t spend my life trying to catch someone up on what I’ve spent my life learning. That’s like trying to teach a woman who doesn’t know who Tom Brady is about football. No can do.

    And I’m glad I’m not the only one who believes Wendy Williams is a man.

    • http://fromselahwithlove.blogspot.com selah

      @thismayconcernyou,

      Who doesn’t believe that? lol

      • bittersweet’s baby

        @selah,

        I was bout to say! She points the fanga at errybody else, but she’s 99.9% ‘How u doin’” her d@mn self…

        • http://fromselahwithlove.blogspot.com selah

          @bittersweet’s baby,

          okay!? I won’t be surprised if the truff comes out in a few years. lol

      • http://www.sistersoundoff.blogspot.com Cheekie

        @selah,

        “Who doesn’t believe that? lol”

        LMFAO. I betcha even Wendy believes it! I bet my last red Skittle that she done accidentally walked into the men’s bathroom at least once.

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

      @thismayconcernyou, I can’t spend my life trying to catch someone up on what I’ve spent my life learning. That’s like trying to teach a woman who doesn’t know who Tom Brady is about football. No can do.

      i kind of wonder if you all aren’t just talking about the whites of white people, like sarah palin white. i think some of the current pop culture stuff is as common as we think. i know just as many white folks watching the wire as black folks. now, if you’re talking coming to america, then yeah. but chances are, the becky’s who dont know that would end up dating a square ass black cat anyway.

      seems to me that the kind of white chicks most black dudes end up dating (well the ones i’m familiar with, trophyism aside) know all the black stuff too. then again, i’m from the south where we all eat the same collard greens and hogmaws.

      • miss t-lee

        @Panama Jackson,
        “then again, i’m from the south where we all eat the same collard greens and hogmaws.”

        Don’t forget the cornbread.

      • V Renee

        @Panama Jackson,

        if you’re talking coming to america, then yeah. .

        My boss quotes Coming to America TO ME. He’s as white as they come. It cracks me up every.single.time.

      • Sula

        @Panama Jackson,

        Agreed.

        Reason #37 will work for any woman not raised in America… even a Black American not raised in America (I have a friend like that. :))

      • Scipio Africanus

        @Panama Jackson,

        The standard I always use is this: if we get seated by the kicthen at a restaurant, and I make my usual, tired, yet favorite thinking-out-loud crack that “they’re seating us in the Rosa Parks section again, I see”, and she doesn’t really get it instantly, then that’s too much of a gap for me.

        Check that.

        It’s too much of a gap for me if she’s black – she was raised around no black people other than her family, she’s adopted, etc.

        Thinking about it a little more, I don’t think I’d expect a non-black-American woman to get my little inside blackety-black references.

      • E

        seems to me that the kind of white chicks most black dudes end up dating (well the ones i’m familiar with, trophyism aside) know all the black stuff too.

        I was interested to read this post. I’m a White woman so I was curious to see your reasons to be apprehensive to date a woman outside of your race. I agree with what Panama said above. I’ve dated outside of my race moreso than I have dated in it and, although I’ve run into a few uncomfortable issues, I haven’t had any real significant problems with it. I, however, along with my friends wouldny describe myself as a typical “Becky” anyway. I obviously don’t know about all of the “Black stuff” as Panama calls it but I know enough to make dating a man outside of my race less difficult.. (and I found it funny that you mentioned the Alpha boat ride because I happen to be a memeber of the NPHC so if I WAS ever approached with that line, I’d have some clue about what you were talking about)

        Anyway nice post, just thought I’d share my 22 cents! ;-)

  • http://fromselahwithlove@Hotmail.com selah

    What has shaped my personal feelings? I guess my environment. Interracial dating is like the thing to do round these parts, so I’ve never seen anything wrong with it. H*ll ,my dad just married a colombian.

    As for me, hot men are hot men, d*mn their race. lol…. never mind the fact that my mom would probably beat me if I brought home a 2520 and started talkin bout marrying him tho. LOL

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

      @selah,

      my dad just married a colombian.

      this sounds like the title to a really corny sitcom on abc

      • IVR

        @The Champ, “this sounds like the title to a really corny sitcom on abc”

        Would that be modern family? (I actually like that show)

        • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

          @IVR, i tried to watch an episode of that show. i just couldn’t get into it.

          what i did notice is the fashion in which all news shows are operating, kind of like “the office”. i cant really describe it, but that, and “community parks” are all shows that seem to be the same in the way they script and direct them.

          • IVR

            @Panama Jackson, ” i tried to watch an episode of that show. i just couldn’t get into it.”

            Well I watch it at work so my boredom could lead to the show being better to me than it actually is . . . plus I’ve always been in love with Sofia Vergara.

            I feel you on “the office” vibe from the new shows though. It’s like everyone is trying to narrate in this b!tch.

          • Me fail english?

            @Panama Jackson,

            That mockumentary, single camera thing? I only watch The Office but I could imagine this getting old. That’s why everyone should watch Glee.

          • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

            “That mockumentary, single camera thing?”

            yeah, i think thats what he’s referring to. still, i prefer that style of comedy to sh*t with laugh tracks and no jokes (ie: “the game”)

          • http://stuffghettopeoplelike.wordpress.com Stuff Ghetto People Like

            @Panama Jackson, yeah, The Office, Parks & Recreation, and Modern Family need to be the last three sitcoms with confessionals.

            But I wonder did people hate Bernie Mac’s confessionals on his show?

        • ComicBookGuy

          @IVR,

          That show is hilarious. Ed O’Neil still is channeling Al Bundy in the show. I can’t lie, those gay dudes be killing me.

          • Sula

            @ComicBookGuy,

            It is hilarious!

            But I do agree with Me Fail though: everybody should watch Glee. It rawks!!!

      • http://fromselahwithlove.blogspot.com Selah

        @The Champ,

        iLove Modern Family :) … The only difference between that show and my family is my dad isn’t 2520. or rich. lol

    • Sula

      @selah,
      As for me, hot men are hot men, d*mn their race.

      Say word. :)

      • http://fromselahwithlove.blogspot.com Selah

        @Sula,

        can i get a witness?! lol

  • shay-d-lady

    I dated a white guy…it was cool until he actually wanted to kiss and do “boyfriend” stuff..lol I actually did date a guy later that was fine enough to get over that hurdle but he was a liberal conservative and I hated having to explain the jokes, the music, and most of all why “black people” find so many things offensive. lastly trying to get him to understand the difference between his poor and mine and why he still had an advantage…..

    • sisanda

      @shay-d-lady,

      hahahaha

      “When you’re poor, you drive a hundyai and have a two bedroom apartment. When we’re poor we drive the Socila welfare department crazy, and have a ten member family sleeping on two beds in a room “apartment”…that’s the difference”

      Sorry, just had to share.

      • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

        @sisanda,

        “When you’re poor, you drive a hundyai and have a two bedroom apartment. When we’re poor we drive the Socila welfare department crazy, and have a ten member family sleeping on two beds in a room “apartment”…that’s the difference”

        is that from a stand-up routine?

    • http://stuffghettopeoplelike.wordpress.com Stuff Ghetto People Like

      @shay-d-lady, “liberal conservative?” You do know what you just said right?

  • RunBabyRun

    I also grew up around inter-racial dating and in some case it doesn’t urk me and in other cases it does urk me…call it situational, I guess.

    It’s simple for me: I RARELY fine white men or women attractive. I hate answering dumb questions about my hair. I don’t want to hear things like, “no, really, what are grits/chitllins/collards”. I don’t want to explain why my dad is darker than my mom, I’m darker than my dad, and my brother is darker than me but we are all still black and in the same family. I don’t want explain why “THEY do this that or the other”.

    I guess it’s like you said, champ, too much context for me to go through while courting or once he and his people get comfortable.

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

      @RunBabyRun,

      I also grew up around inter-racial dating and in some case it doesn’t urk me and in other cases it does urk me…call it situational, I guess.

      do you know what causes the difference?

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

      @RunBabyRun, “no, really, what are grits/chitllins/collards”.

      we don’t have this problem down south.

      • http://ecstaticfreshness.wordpress.com AkShone

        Word.

      • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

        @Panama Jackson,

        we don’t have this problem down south.

        “the differences between northern and southern white people.” sounds like a potential vsb entry

        • IVR

          @The Champ, ““the differences between northern and southern white people.””

          I’d say a difference is that northern white folks know not to be public with their racism (I-talians excluded). The stories I’ve heard about white folks down south is crazy . . . Although I think someone on this site mentioned seeing a klan rally in NYC . . . .they prolly planned that during the million man march.

        • http://stuffghettopeoplelike.wordpress.com Stuff Ghetto People Like

          @The Champ, would west coast whites count as “northern?”

          • http://mysixcents.wordpress.com klysha

            @Stuff Ghetto People Like, I think they could warrant their own category

      • miss t-lee

        @Panama Jackson,
        Sure don’t.

    • Vnss

      @RunBabyRun, as a non-American, specifically non-southern black woman, you’d have to explain the chitlins/ collard difference to me too. Would it bother you to explain the difference to me?

      Just as your feelings towards interracial dating is situational, so too are peoples experiences. It all depends on where you lived, how you lived and everything else that surrounds you.

      There is nothing wrong with interacial dating, just as there is nothing wrong with dating within your race. People have difference preferences and that’s fair. But I’d appreciate if we said that instead of coming up with overarching stereotypes as to why it won’t work with ANY white boy/girl. You don’t stop dating black men just because you’ve had a bad experience with one would you?

  • shay-d-lady

    lol man I’m trippin here’s the rest of my post
    with all that being said if I were out in the field, I wouldn’t be against dating outside the race I just need to find one cool enough to know better about some shyt with similar interests…yet fine enough to get it…..lol basically the same thing I would need in a brother…cause I have also dated some conservatively liberal brothers and I’d rather date a white one..lol at least they have an excuse for their ignorance….but longterm I doubt I could do it……chalk it up to having racist parents..lol

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

      @shay-d-lady,

      lol, so you’d basically just cut it off after 4 dates?

  • sexywinergirl

    Everyday I have a new reason to love this blog more and more

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

      @sexywinergirl,

      me too

    • http://jackgetsapack.blogspot.com/ Jackie

      @sexywinergirl,

      I agree whole-heartedly with this statement! I almost smacked a white-man-loving-Black-woman yesterday because I thought she blocked this site from the work server!

      ….nothing compares to black men. I’ve dated white men who love sistahs; I dated an East Indian dentist who’s parents met and birthed him in Nairobi; I dated a tall handsome Guatemalan with chocolate kissed skin, beautiful teeth and a immeasurably nasty attitude; I’ve never dated an Asian….though, I have had a fling with a Chinese & Black Jamaican, while visiting my friends in Kingston…..BUT NOTHING compares to my black men!! I especially have a soft spot for Trinis.

      It’s everything from the bass in their voices, to their beautiful hands, and brown eyes, and skin tones that only a chocolatier can match. The way they just put your sassy finger-snappin, attitude-havin, strong-black-woman ass in check with that firm “No.” OR when they give you that behave yourself look when you’ved had too many drinks at a party and start whinin down the place! Then, when you get home and they completely ravage you and destroy the expensive Victoria’s Sercet balconette bra and garter belt set you spent 3 hours picking out on a weekend shopping spree with “the girls”…of whom, might I mention, he hates one, is attrated to the other and tolerates the last two just because he understands how important the Black women bond is.

      Black men understand me better that’s all.

      • http://www.museacdonline.com pgh muse

        @Jackie, It’s everything from the bass in their voices, to their beautiful hands, and brown eyes, and skin tones that only a chocolatier can match. The way they just put your sassy finger-snappin, attitude-havin, strong-black-woman ass in check with that firm “No.” OR when they give you that behave yourself look when you’ved had too many drinks at a party and start whinin down the place! Then, when you get home and they completely ravage you and destroy the expensive Victoria’s Sercet balconette bra and garter belt set you spent 3 hours picking out on a weekend shopping spree with “the girls”…of whom, might I mention, he hates one, is attrated to the other and tolerates the last two just because he understands how important the Black women bond is.

        Black men understand me better that’s all.

        This is sweet too… awwww.

      • V Renee

        @Jackie,

        I loved this whole response. It made me smile.

      • http://lmbao.org Dorian G.

        @Jackie,

        LMAO

      • OrangeStar616

        @Jackie, aside from the girlfriend comments, LOL this tigress doesn’t roll like lionesses, no prides ova here, ITA…..

      • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

        @Jackie,

        I’ve dated white men who love sistahs; I dated an East Indian dentist who’s parents met and birthed him in Nairobi; I dated a tall handsome Guatemalan with chocolate kissed skin, beautiful teeth and a immeasurably nasty attitude; I’ve never dated an Asian….though, I have had a fling with a Chinese & Black Jamaican, while visiting my friends in Kingston…..

        you get around and sh*t

        • Hershey’s Kiss

          @The Champ, I was thinking the same thing.

      • Just Me

        I agree with most of this post (except for the “getting me in check”–don’t talk to me like a child). Too bad black men don’t feel the same way about us! They talk about us like DOGS, even to other non-blacks and can’t wait to taste an “other” as soon as the opportunity arises most of the time.

  • http://Invisiblemannakedcity.wordpress.com Invisiblemannakedcity

    Here’s my reason:

    #1: Have eat chicken with a fork and knife.
    #2: Good luck keeping any of your black female friends on the backburner.
    #3: Can’t make jokes about white people, well you could, but she’d cross the line and make an off color black joke.
    #4: If you went to college, you definitely know it’s not a good look and it actually brings the hope of an entire generation of black youth down.
    #5: Chances are if a black man is dating a white woman, she only has a big booty cuz she’s OBESE.

    • IVR

      @Invisiblemannakedcity, “#5: Chances are if a black man is dating a white woman, she only has a big booty cuz she’s OBESE.”

      Blasphemy . . . white women wit @ss is becoming a “thing” . . . as in there is more than one of them. I was just talking to a friend about this the other day.

      • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

        @IVR,

        Blasphemy . . . white women wit @ss is becoming a “thing” . . . as in there is more than one of them. I was just talking to a friend about this the other day.

        there aren’t “more” of them, lol. its not like white women all of a sudden just started growing asses out of nowhere. its just that

        (1) before the j-lo effect, white women who had asses were encouraged to conceal them. now, since having ass is “in style”, thicker or shapelier white chicks dont try to hide their asses anymore

        (2) most popular women’s jeans are cut now in a way to accentuate their curves, basically doing to ass and hips what the wonderbra did to breasts

        • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

          @The Champ, yeah, i think its more of a show ‘em what you got thing now.

          they’ve always been there, now they’re just on display b/c it’s not a bad thing anymore.

          kind of like ignorance.

        • IVR

          @The Champ, “there aren’t “more” of them, lol. its not like white women all of a sudden just started growing asses out of nowhere. its just that ”

          You right . . . but when the “style” starts springing up outta nowhere you gotta think it for a little bit. Got folks testing water reservoirs and sh!t . . .

          • HabitualLineCrossa

            @IVR, its all them kids they be swallowing.

  • http://lizburr.com Liz

    I’m not opposed to it. I just don’t think it’s likely to happen for one reason or another.

    As for when I see it out in the wild, I might flinch and give a side-eye to a suspicious looking couple, but I always know deep down I am in no place to cast judgement, etc., so it’s not a big deal to me. *shrug*

    • Santi

      @Liz, ‘As for when I see it out in the wild, I might flinch and give a side-eye’

      As someone who has predominantly dated people outside my race,because
      A) I’m Australian and not that many black people roaming the streets,spotting one is like trying to see a Kangaroo in the city-highly unlikely
      B) The occasional brothers you’d bump into are down with white girls
      C) The occasional brothers you’d bump into steal your sh*t and lie (from my experience,mind you this is based on 2 black guys)
      D) The ones that do approach you are on some Africa,Kunta Kinte/Marcus Garvey tip and start off with my sista,we belong on the african soil..

      It’s funny about how everyone talks about someone not ‘getting’ us as a race,hence easier to not date outside. I think we use this as an excuse plenty of times and I have been fortunate that the men I have been with listen and respect my views as a woman. Yes,they may not get a few cultural references,but I do educate them on what matters the most to me,and the fact that they respect that and although they may never have it as hard as I do,love me for all that I am. I think the worst judgement of interracial dating comes from within the black community. I was with my current 2520 man on holiday in Europe and we are so used to PDA-ing it up in Oz that we soon realised that the rules are different in other parts of the world. Was riding an escalator and this group of brothers where riding the opposite one and yelled’ hey’ sista..look you dropped something’ and as I looked down,heard him yell out ‘Your colour’.

      It was hurtful yes,especially coming from my own people,who didn’t even understand the situation. But it won’t stop me from dating outside my race as I’m getting everything I want right now,plus I find the sex is better with 2520′s…I’m just telling it like it is!

      • Shay

        @Santi,

        Dayum. What’d ol’ boy do? I know you gotta pick your fights or you’ll be fighting all day, but, I would have been offended for you.

        Truth be told, I got more side eye when I was out with a Zulu girl in SA. The Afrikaners and the Zulus were both giving me the dirtiest looks I’d ever seen.

        I don’t speak Dutch/Afrikaans, but I know you’re talking about me trick.
        …And I don’t speak much Zulu, but I know umlungu is referring to me, jackass.

        • Santi

          @Shay, haha…He wanted to follow them and ‘sort them out’ as he said,but it wasn’t worth it. I don’t need to justify someone’s ignorance,and if anything,that episode made me see my man for what he truly is,an honourable man,who will stand by me and fight my battles.

          And the guys that said it where all about late teens,tryna be gangsta and just causing trouble. Would’ve been there all day…I think the worst was when everyone who’d heard started to turn around and stare…and the sista’s just gave me the meanest side eye,like that wouldn’t have happened if you were with a brother…
          it’s funny,in the relationship,colour doesn’t play a part,it’s the world’s opinions that try and remind us we are black/white.

          • Shay

            @Santi,

            I gotta special spot in my heart for chicks who respect honor and the word of a man and all that jazz.

            I was called noble one time, and to this day that remains, in my opinion, of the best compliments I’ve ever received. She was a sista from Philly, too.

      • Wanjiru

        @Santi,
        I’m Australian and not that many black people roaming the streets,spotting one is like trying to see a Kangaroo in the city-highly unlikely,
        Bangs’ down under now! ha ha ha .Sorry- I just had to go there ;-)

        • Santi

          @Wanjiru, LMAO…

          @ Shay, yeah at the end of the day,qualities you are looking for in a companion have no colour lines and I would rather be with someone who respects me and may not get the occasional black comments,than someone who disrespects me and is black.

          Are you black Shay? Coz I’m a lil confused,your comments sound for lack of a better term, ‘black’ (and that’s just opened up a can of worms)…but I’m curious,coz my friends and I have an opinion about white guys that ONLY date black girls…

          • Shay

            @Santi,

            I’m mixed. My father was a Vietnamese refugee after the war, and my mother is white.

            And it’s okay. The same sista from Philly said that she gets the strangest looks from her friends/family when they find out I’m mixed (not black).

            The folks in SA considered me white. Or as they put it ‘white enough’. I honestly think that was the first time in my life someone had ever considered me white, off gate. People typically think I’m latino, Hawaiian, Samoan, or some olive skinned ethnicity based on looks alone.

            Habla espanol muy, muy, muy poquito.

            My dating demographics break down to a majority of black women, but I’m open to dating every race, really. Asian women won’t have me though, I don’t understand that.

            So what’s this theory you and your ladies have? I’m curious.

        • kingpinenut

          @Wanjiru,

          “I’m Australian and not that many black people roaming the streets,spotting one is like trying to see a Kangaroo in the city-highly unlikely”

          that’s why my boy left…couldn’t deal with it….

          • Santi

            @Shay, the theory me and my girlfriend’s have on non-black men dating purely black women are that their ninja lovers and probably wanted to be black themselves. usually hang around only black folk…

            I remember this one guy who dated a friend of mine,he would be up in the club,errytime a dark skinned sista walked in he’d holler. All his friends are black,and like I said,there’s not taht many black ppl in these parts,so it had us questioning some of the white fellas intentions…

            I am wary of the 2520 who loves him some chocolate

      • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

        @Santi,

        A) I’m Australian and not that many black people roaming the streets,spotting one is like trying to see a Kangaroo in the city-highly unlikely

        you know, despite whatever misconceptions people have about it, 9 times out of 10, when you see a black man dating a white woman its for this reason.

        men typically aren’t as particular as women are when deciding who to date, and we usually just make do with who’s available and accessible. its usually not about “preferring”

        • Me fail english?

          @The Champ,

          I dunno Champ. I’ve seen plenty of black men with white women in places where there were large populations of sisters like New York and New Jersey. It may happen more often than people think (for example, if you’re in grad school, most programs you wont find al lot of “us”), but 9 out of 10 sounds like a huge reach.

          • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

            @Me fail english?,

            new york doesnt count

          • Me fail english?

            count deez!

        • Santi

          @The Champ, I agree with you – 98.2% to be exact.

          I have seen on numerous occasions brothers who have every opportunity to date a sista,but just won’t do it. I think there might be a misconception that all sista’s coz drama and they want none of that.

          I have this one friend,he’s a brother and he pulled up from london a year ago and i was like,so ‘what’s the deal bro’ and he was on some,I love my sista’s ,but wouldn’t date ‘em. And negro had the nerve to say,he wants caramel toned children,not ashy crackedy skinned ones. Suffice to say,I don’t speak to him anymore.

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

      @Liz,

      As for when I see it out in the wild

      lol at “in the wild”, like you’ll turn on the discovery channel and watch a show about ray-ray and becky of the serengeti.

  • cam1ll3

    i was raised in the caribbean around a myriad of shades, sizes and attitudes of west indian men. i love black men. i can’t help it. i would give another persuasian a chance if i were presented with the opportunity i guess (i have seen many a fine blanco, asian and hispanic–i just always come back to black). *ironically, i’m the product of an interracial relationship and mom almost exclusively dated outside her race (she’s black).

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

      @cam1ll3,

      nothing to add here. i just wanted to thank you for using “irony” properly

      • cam1ll3

        @The Champ,

        i do what i can do when i can do what i can do. :-)