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Eternal Sunshine of Carl Thomas to the Future

It’s Friday.

One of my favorite movies of all time is Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. Everybody’s had a person in their life that they wish could have be erased from memory. This movie depicted this concept and theory flawlessly to me.

Not to mention, you get Kirsten Dunst in her undies for a good segment of the movie. Not that I find her particularly attractive, but whatever. Skin is skin. Unless said skin belongs to Grace Jones or Angela Lansbury, in which case, you can have it.

Carl Thomas also felt this way and did his best impression of a person who could sing in his first single, “I Wish I Never Met Her”. And despite the fact that Carl Thomas sounds like ass vocally, the sentiments are quite apropos. Been there done that. Wish I never did what I done done. Like Shawty Lo, except spelled “dun dun”.

Thing is, I have maybe one person that I wished I’d never met. Hell, I’m pretty sure I told her at some point. But there was no crying for her Argentina. Truth is, though I wished I’d never met her, in some way, she helped to contribute to the sexxy beast that I am today. So perhaps wishing I never met somebody is a bit extreme.

However…there are definitely SITUATIONS that in retrospect I wish I would have changed. Hell, if I had my current wisdom I wouldn’t have made many of the mistakes I made early on. Like the time I knew my ex had cheated on me but I chose to “not believe it”. If I had the chance to go back, I’d have just dropped her ass that day I figured it out instead of hanging around for more months of insane boredom and inexperienced domegame. Sh*t, I could have had a V8. Because of that chick I ended up passing up a chance to have my way with Beyonce before she met Jay. And that’s not true at all, however it made for a better story than it started out as.

For the hell of it: Butteryfly Effect.

So, good people of VSB.com in the Kingdom of Smartness, what would you do differently? Any blemishes from the past that you’d like to Proactiv away or decisions that probably just weren’t so hot that your current wisdom wouldn’t let happen even if Mel Gibson was directing your life’s story?

-VSB P

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Panama Jackson

Panama Jackson is pretty fly for a light guy. He used to ship his frito to Tito in the District, but shipping prices increased so he moved there to save money. When he's not saving humanity with his words or making music with his mouth, you can find him at your mama's mama's house drinking her fine liquors. Most importantly, he believes the children are our future.

  • http://www.singleblackmale.net Single Black Male

    After reading this, one person pops into mind. Its like you know its pointless, you know its all a waste of time, but you just hope its gonna rebound like a bad stock or the dead fish I had when I was 10 thinking “its just sleeping”.

    But on the same note, she helped to learn what to avoid. I shed no tears for her (please … me cry!) … but I did call in sick to work one day. And that day … I will never get back.

    Anyways, to end on a introspective note … she taught me something. And ever since her … I have made better choices, and wouldn’t have been able to without her. I would say thank you, but … f*ck that hoe!

    • Leila

      “I would say thank you, but … f*ck that hoe!”

      Another T-Shirt?

      • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

        yes

        • http://www.singleblackmale.net Single Black Male

          Your right … but I’m gonna keep the rights to this one. Claiming it now!

          • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

            It’s a good one to claim. Keep bangin’.

            • http://www.myspace.com/donteacia Teacia

              “I would say thank you, but … f*ck that hoe!”

              Priceless…lol.

            • http://www.myspace.com/donteacia Teacia

              “I would say thank you, but … f*ck that hoe!”

              Priceless…lol.

            • http://www.singleblackmale.net Single Black Male

              I think “F*ck that B*tch” might work out better … but that b* word can open all kinds of untold troubles (hence the reason for the “self censoring” in the original comment).

            • http://www.singleblackmale.net Single Black Male

              I think “F*ck that B*tch” might work out better … but that b* word can open all kinds of untold troubles (hence the reason for the “self censoring” in the original comment).

          • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

            It’s a good one to claim. Keep bangin’.

          • genius khan

            i would wear this on a t-shirt SBM. not around my dad though.

            i’m feeling ur claim SBM fo sho. ayo, if i got anything out here anybody wanna use for commercial purposes…….

            i’m just saying you’d rather play wit me than against me. hear me now believe me later.

          • genius khan

            i would wear this on a t-shirt SBM. not around my dad though.

            i’m feeling ur claim SBM fo sho. ayo, if i got anything out here anybody wanna use for commercial purposes…….

            i’m just saying you’d rather play wit me than against me. hear me now believe me later.

        • http://www.singleblackmale.net Single Black Male

          Your right … but I’m gonna keep the rights to this one. Claiming it now!

        • Wise Diva

          I want to apply for the position, Director of T-Shirt Operations. When are you going to advertise the job announcement?

          • Intellectual Hedonist

            @ wise~can I be your assistant?

            • Wise Diva

              you sure can! and I promise not to make you walk across the George Washington bridge for cheesecake or anything either

            • Wise Diva

              you sure can! and I promise not to make you walk across the George Washington bridge for cheesecake or anything either

            • Intellectual Hedonist

              I just enjoy wielding other people’s power. I’m so passive aggressive…lol!

            • Intellectual Hedonist

              I just enjoy wielding other people’s power. I’m so passive aggressive…lol!

          • Intellectual Hedonist

            @ wise~can I be your assistant?

          • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

            “I want to apply for the position, Director of T-Shirt Operations. When are you going to advertise the job announcement?”

            its on craigslist already

          • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

            “I want to apply for the position, Director of T-Shirt Operations. When are you going to advertise the job announcement?”

            its on craigslist already

        • Wise Diva

          I want to apply for the position, Director of T-Shirt Operations. When are you going to advertise the job announcement?

      • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

        yes

    • Leila

      “I would say thank you, but … f*ck that hoe!”

      Another T-Shirt?

  • http://www.singleblackmale.net Single Black Male

    After reading this, one person pops into mind. Its like you know its pointless, you know its all a waste of time, but you just hope its gonna rebound like a bad stock or the dead fish I had when I was 10 thinking “its just sleeping”.

    But on the same note, she helped to learn what to avoid. I shed no tears for her (please … me cry!) … but I did call in sick to work one day. And that day … I will never get back.

    Anyways, to end on a introspective note … she taught me something. And ever since her … I have made better choices, and wouldn’t have been able to without her. I would say thank you, but … f*ck that hoe!

  • http://lizburr.com Liz

    I definitely have a few people i wish I had never met at all, and a few times i wish I just woulda let my curiosity ride. I just think I would have been happier being naive.

  • http://lizburr.com Liz

    I definitely have a few people i wish I had never met at all, and a few times i wish I just woulda let my curiosity ride. I just think I would have been happier being naive.

  • http://www.myspace.com/bbgirl180 Tay

    Yes, I definitely have one person in mind that I wish I NEVER met and wasted a year on.

    But then I think about it and I realized that he helped me discover what to avoid so in a way, I guess it is a good thing that I met that country a** bamma.

    I do wish I had handled the situation differently but you know hindsight is always 20/20.

  • http://www.myspace.com/bbgirl180 Tay

    Yes, I definitely have one person in mind that I wish I NEVER met and wasted a year on.

    But then I think about it and I realized that he helped me discover what to avoid so in a way, I guess it is a good thing that I met that country a** bamma.

    I do wish I had handled the situation differently but you know hindsight is always 20/20.

  • aja

    O0O…Regrets rear their ugly heads…once again.

    There is one man i kinda wish i never met..but then again if i didnt i wouldnt have the most special thing in my life.

    So i guess you cant go back and change things without affecting something else.
    But the good thing is..you learn from your mistakes and know what NOT to do next time.. ;)

    Life is a learning process..we all go thru it.

    • Monnie

      “But the good thing is..you learn from your mistakes and know what NOT to do next time.”

      The smart ones learn. Then there is the group of people that keep doing the same thing over and over hoping to get a different experience/result.

      • http://goodeness.blogspot.com GOODENess

        the definition of insanity!

      • http://goodeness.blogspot.com GOODENess

        the definition of insanity!

    • Monnie

      “But the good thing is..you learn from your mistakes and know what NOT to do next time.”

      The smart ones learn. Then there is the group of people that keep doing the same thing over and over hoping to get a different experience/result.

  • aja

    O0O…Regrets rear their ugly heads…once again.

    There is one man i kinda wish i never met..but then again if i didnt i wouldnt have the most special thing in my life.

    So i guess you cant go back and change things without affecting something else.
    But the good thing is..you learn from your mistakes and know what NOT to do next time.. ;)

    Life is a learning process..we all go thru it.

  • http://www.thekillacal.com The Killa

    I hate to be one of “those guys” but everyone I’ve encountered has taught me about myself in good and bad ways….I’ve learned from them and though my experiences haven’t always been good and some chicks are cold hearted wenches from the depths of hell who turn kind hearted mild mannered Clark Kent types into the Victor Von Doom’s of the world I wouldn’t want to erase any of them at all….

    now photoshop…that’s another matter entirely!

    • aja

      see women like that make me angry..and it makes it harder for the “real women” to find a good man..whos not jaded by the “cold hearted wenches from the depths of hell”

      thats just extra baggage we have to deal with on top of everything else.
      Sometimes you have to have a fresh pair of eyes when looking for someone new, and keeping in mind that every woman will not be that way.

      MESSAGE!

      • Monnie

        “MESSAGE!”

        *chuckles*

        I can see Keenan Wayan now…

        • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

          Ya know, Don’t Be A Menace is actually one of my favorite movies too.

          I even think its funnier than Friday.

          • Monnie

            I find that few people admit to liking it… My mom likes it too and she rarely likes movies (especially hood one.)

            My one of my favorite parts was Bernie Mac:
            “I hate the back of Forrest Whitaker’s neck, ugh!”

          • Monnie

            I find that few people admit to liking it… My mom likes it too and she rarely likes movies (especially hood one.)

            My one of my favorite parts was Bernie Mac:
            “I hate the back of Forrest Whitaker’s neck, ugh!”

          • ForReal

            I always hesitate to say this out loud, but i don’t even really care that much for Friday. The few people I’ve told act like I just spit in their momma’s eye.

            • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

              “I always hesitate to say this out loud, but i don’t even really care that much for Friday. The few people I’ve told act like I just spit in their momma’s eye.”

              **volunteer work**

            • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

              “I always hesitate to say this out loud, but i don’t even really care that much for Friday. The few people I’ve told act like I just spit in their momma’s eye.”

              **volunteer work**

            • http://www.myspace.com/chicanextdoor Miss Patterson

              @ For Real…thank you! when Friday came out me and my girl were the only 2 black women in the theatre NOT laughing. i just didn’t ‘get it’. oh well…

            • http://www.myspace.com/chicanextdoor Miss Patterson

              @ For Real…thank you! when Friday came out me and my girl were the only 2 black women in the theatre NOT laughing. i just didn’t ‘get it’. oh well…

            • don giovanni

              finally!! it’s not that there wasn’t anything funny about it, because the whole premise of the movie was insanely hilarious and the fact that it achieved such popularity was extremely comical!! i can say this proudly, “since the movie came out for home veiwing pleasures, i have owned the dvd in an unopened case with the plastic wrap and best buy sticker still affixed to it!!” if only i could find that damn receipt!!

            • don giovanni

              finally!! it’s not that there wasn’t anything funny about it, because the whole premise of the movie was insanely hilarious and the fact that it achieved such popularity was extremely comical!! i can say this proudly, “since the movie came out for home veiwing pleasures, i have owned the dvd in an unopened case with the plastic wrap and best buy sticker still affixed to it!!” if only i could find that damn receipt!!

          • ForReal

            I always hesitate to say this out loud, but i don’t even really care that much for Friday. The few people I’ve told act like I just spit in their momma’s eye.

          • http://myspace.com/thomasforbes Monk

            I think “Friday” was hysterically funny in the beginning and middle. The lines alone that are used to this day is proof of its hilarity and Chris Tucker’s remarkable comedic timing (at that point in his career), with assist from the other actors.

            I just think it went downhill towards the end once they was hiding out from Big Worm, sneaking in Debo’s spot, and the ill-fated attempt at social commentary about Nia Long’s sister being abused by Debo. It wasn’t funny no more once all that went down.

            Overall though, it’s still CLASSIC!!

          • http://myspace.com/thomasforbes Monk

            I think “Friday” was hysterically funny in the beginning and middle. The lines alone that are used to this day is proof of its hilarity and Chris Tucker’s remarkable comedic timing (at that point in his career), with assist from the other actors.

            I just think it went downhill towards the end once they was hiding out from Big Worm, sneaking in Debo’s spot, and the ill-fated attempt at social commentary about Nia Long’s sister being abused by Debo. It wasn’t funny no more once all that went down.

            Overall though, it’s still CLASSIC!!

        • http://verysmartbrothas.com Panama Jackson

          Ya know, Don’t Be A Menace is actually one of my favorite movies too.

          I even think its funnier than Friday.

      • Monnie

        “MESSAGE!”

        *chuckles*

        I can see Keenan Wayan now…

      • http://goodeness.blogspot.com GOODENess

        ain’t that the truth! I don’t make the next man pay for the sins of the last man, but I find myself being held accountable for past f*ckery that I didn’t even commit…eventually thier inability to let that old ish go, causes major issues…and unltimately…”rock kicking”

        • don giovanni

          are you sure about that?? i mean, you can try but no one is completely baggageless!! it does carry over whether we would like to believe it or not!!

          • http://goodeness.blogspot.com GOODENess

            I am not saying I am baggage less… I am just saying I pack light… I don’t believe for a second that all men should be painted with the same brush… I am a good woman and I refuse to believe that there aren’t good men out there… I can’t be the only one left, that’s crazy! I am a male advocate… so just because the last one did some dirt, doesn’t mean the next one will…you know?

            • don giovanni

              i understand your theory, but its hard for people to put into practice seeing that with each failed relationship brings emotional scars that cause people to try and keep from getting hurt again, bringing about more scars!! its something on a subconscious level that we do!! we can all claim to be impervious to it, but we aren’t!!

            • don giovanni

              i understand your theory, but its hard for people to put into practice seeing that with each failed relationship brings emotional scars that cause people to try and keep from getting hurt again, bringing about more scars!! its something on a subconscious level that we do!! we can all claim to be impervious to it, but we aren’t!!

            • http://goodeness.blogspot.com GOODENess

              I COMPLETELY agree with you DG…we all fall short, but putting forth a concerted effort to make a change in yourself and how you handle disappointment, hurt, etc, can change your perspective…and thusly your reaction…maybe my language seems to paint this as an easy undertaking, be assured, this is a daily conscious effort on my part… I apply it to my whole life, not just romantic dynamics…but when I get upset or feel hurt, I take a second to figure out WHY I am really upset and WHO I am really mad at… a little goes a long way, and I am not by any means saying that I never fall short of my goal to handle each person on their own merits, I am told I do very well ith making it a reality…I try to learn my role in the good, bad, and the ugly from the past and not repeat it in the future…I can’t control what others do, only how I handle it…

            • http://goodeness.blogspot.com GOODENess

              I COMPLETELY agree with you DG…we all fall short, but putting forth a concerted effort to make a change in yourself and how you handle disappointment, hurt, etc, can change your perspective…and thusly your reaction…maybe my language seems to paint this as an easy undertaking, be assured, this is a daily conscious effort on my part… I apply it to my whole life, not just romantic dynamics…but when I get upset or feel hurt, I take a second to figure out WHY I am really upset and WHO I am really mad at… a little goes a long way, and I am not by any means saying that I never fall short of my goal to handle each person on their own merits, I am told I do very well ith making it a reality…I try to learn my role in the good, bad, and the ugly from the past and not repeat it in the future…I can’t control what others do, only how I handle it…

          • http://goodeness.blogspot.com GOODENess

            I am not saying I am baggage less… I am just saying I pack light… I don’t believe for a second that all men should be painted with the same brush… I am a good woman and I refuse to believe that there aren’t good men out there… I can’t be the only one left, that’s crazy! I am a male advocate… so just because the last one did some dirt, doesn’t mean the next one will…you know?

        • don giovanni

          are you sure about that?? i mean, you can try but no one is completely baggageless!! it does carry over whether we would like to believe it or not!!

      • http://goodeness.blogspot.com GOODENess

        ain’t that the truth! I don’t make the next man pay for the sins of the last man, but I find myself being held accountable for past f*ckery that I didn’t even commit…eventually thier inability to let that old ish go, causes major issues…and unltimately…”rock kicking”

    • aja

      see women like that make me angry..and it makes it harder for the “real women” to find a good man..whos not jaded by the “cold hearted wenches from the depths of hell”

      thats just extra baggage we have to deal with on top of everything else.
      Sometimes you have to have a fresh pair of eyes when looking for someone new, and keeping in mind that every woman will not be that way.

      MESSAGE!

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

      “now photoshop…that’s another matter entirely!”

      this made me choke on my pink grapefruit and grits

      • JBoogie

        sounds good…hope my kiwi and oatmeal will be as tasty…

      • JBoogie

        sounds good…hope my kiwi and oatmeal will be as tasty…

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

      “now photoshop…that’s another matter entirely!”

      this made me choke on my pink grapefruit and grits

    • Intellectual Hedonist

      Isn’t that what “It’s a Wonderful Life” is about sans “cold hearted wenches from the depths of hell who turn kind hearted mild mannered Clark Kent types into the Victor Von Doom’s of the world”

    • Intellectual Hedonist

      Isn’t that what “It’s a Wonderful Life” is about sans “cold hearted wenches from the depths of hell who turn kind hearted mild mannered Clark Kent types into the Victor Von Doom’s of the world”

  • http://www.thekillacal.com The Killa

    I hate to be one of “those guys” but everyone I’ve encountered has taught me about myself in good and bad ways….I’ve learned from them and though my experiences haven’t always been good and some chicks are cold hearted wenches from the depths of hell who turn kind hearted mild mannered Clark Kent types into the Victor Von Doom’s of the world I wouldn’t want to erase any of them at all….

    now photoshop…that’s another matter entirely!

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