I’m pretty sure I’ve said on here before that Pitch Perfect is one of my absolute new favorite movies. It’s as much for the non-sensicalness of the movie as it is for the acapella singing. I’m here for acapella. It’s just that entertaining. Well, one of the main songs both covered and played in Pitch Perfect is Simple Minds, “Don’t You Forget About Me”, a song made super popular in America when it was played during both the open and closing credits of The Breakfast Club in 1985. Full confession: I never loved The Breakfast Club as much as I think I was supposed to. I know its considered the pre-eminent teen movie and all that jazz and I love John Hughes movies as much as the next guy, I just didn’t love it as much as I wanted to.
Switch up right quick.
Have you seen Pleasantville? It’s the movie featuring Seabiscuit‘s jockey and Elle Woods of Legally Blonde fame where they get transported into a black and white television show based on all around pleasantness. The high and low of every day is a perfect 72 degrees. Well Reese Witherspoon teaches everybody how to drop down and get their eagle on, and in turns lots of kids end up with a f*cking problem. <—-double entendre
The expansion of their lives turns them colored instead of black and white and turns the city on its head and all that jazz. I’m really not going to go into the plot because its irrelevant. Lil Tobey ends up managing to finagle his way back into his own regular world and his girlfriend in Pleasantville – she’s techni-colored – says to him before he leaves, “Don’t forget about me. Even if you never make it back here to visit…just…don’t forget about me.”
After hearing that, and thinking about the song and how often I’ve heard some variation in movies and television…I wonder how much is that a real concern for people in relationships?
Like as you walk on by, do you worry about somebody you actually dated ever truly forgetting that you existed? Now, creep with me for a second.
In theory I get this wholesale. Nobody ever wants to not have mattered…or mattered to somebody so little to the point that a person they gave some, or any amount of time to would actually see right through them for lack of any genuine connection to a life once shared. But what is the real likelihood of this happening?
More full disclosure: There are women that I’ve dated for whom I cannot recall a last name to save my life. That was also over a decade ago and dated is a strong term. There isn’t a single woman that I’ve felt had any type of significant bearing in my life that I’d “forget”. To that end, it would be ridiculous to expect somebody I went on one date with 10 years ago to remember me and vice versa, but it always seems like these songs or statements are made to folks who hold a measurable level of significance. There are some women that have been in my life that I couldn’t forget if you gave me 50 years plus Alzheimer’s.
By the way, Alzheimer’s = Old Timer’s for those of you who actually didn’t realize it was a medical condition as opposed to just state of being.
But forget the other people, I also can’t remember ever feeling compelled to tell anybody, or ask them rather, not to forget about me. Seems a little selfish. Granted…again…nobody wants to be forgotten, nor does anybody want to think that something that they gave time, energy, and attention to was a forgettable experience, but how many people are really out here having long term, or significant forgettable experiences?
Which perhaps means that the definition of “forget” is altered. See, while there are lots of people that I will never forget for whatever contribution they’ve brought to my life, there are people for whom the details have become sketchy. I’m pretty good with birthdays. Correction: my phone is good with birthdays. And I can always remember where somebody is from. But the other things…favorite foods or movies, or what makes them laugh and tick…well that has, understandably I think, gone the way of the condor. And why wouldn’t it? Once you stop dating somebody, the details you used to get you from day to day become useless in your mental rolodex. Which, seems totally fair and normal. You become somebody that I used to know. There’s a reason that song was so huge…that idea makes so much sense. I definitely have people that I used to know in my life…but they’re all unforgettable like Nat King.
So it brings me back to the larger question, are people genuinely concerned about being forgotten by people they no longer date? Is this ever a real concern? And is it about the details or just being forgotten on some Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind type of stuff (one of my favorite movies of all time, ever)?
Just in case, I’m asking you not to forget about me. Please. Thank you.
-VSB P aka THE ARSONIST aka MR. YOU AIN’T FORGET ALREADY DID YOU aka GIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIRL HE A 3
Since we’re here for the movies today, I’ve been given the opportunity to give away two (2) copies of Kevin Hart’s latest DVD, Let Me Explain, courtesy of CodeBlack Films. The film comes out today, October 15th, in stores and online everywhere. But if you hate standing in line and want to test your luck for a free copy courtesy of VerySmartBrothas and Codeblack Flims, here’s what you have to do, be the first two folks on Twitter (sorry, I’m turning it into a Twitter promo) to tweet @verysmartbros the right answer to this question: What exactly was Kevin Hart trying to explain in this DVD? Add the hashtag #VSBLetMeExplain