- admin note: the original photo here has been removed. the champ felt bad picking on innocent party bystanders. carry on.
an epidemic unique to the black community, the “diva dude” describes the mindset created in certain faulty brothas, developed after reading and hearing about the “good black male shortage” supposedly sweeping through the country at a pandemic rate.
it’s a condition, an aura which basically lets every eligible woman within a 25 mile radius know “look, i’ve read the same articles that you have, and since i’m such an “endangered species“, i pretty much have carte blanche to do whatever the hell I want with you. kiss the ring, desperate b*tch”.
they’re walking among us, twirling blue and white sticks and passive-aggressively suggesting dutch first dates as we speak, and it’s one of vsb’s crime-fighting duties to locate and brand them before they continue to poison the already murky dating pool.
here are a few characteristics and behaviors synonymous of the diva dude. If any man possesses seven or more of these traits, he qualifies.
think of this as a dating DSM-IV.
***before I continue, i want to make it very clear that being a young, successful, black male definitely doesn’t automatically make you a DD. DD’s are bred in insecurity…grown-*ss babies who need female attention to validate their existence. basically, these are the type of cats who would all of a sudden start using initials for their first names when becoming successful, thinking that “t. jonathan butler” on a business card might procure more panties than regular ole “tyrone j. butler” ever did***
1. they’re 25 to 35 years old, straight and single with degrees and decent incomes
basically, they’re the remaining 7.2 percent nightline leaves out when they make their hysterical “92.8 percent of black men are either dead, in jail, unemployable, still rocking FUBU, or f*cking a kardashian” graphics
2. they live in college towns or cities with metropolitan areas over 500,000 people
this is very important for two reasons:
A) most large metropolitan areas are perceived to have more “eligible” women than men, and this assumption allows the diva dude to basically get away with his bullsh*t unfettered.
B) if a group of women get wise and catches them, recognizing in them numerous diva dude characteristics, there’s always another mall or happy hour or convention somewhere in the city where the “mythical black man” shtick will probably guarantee free panties. there are suckers for DD’s with degrees born every minute.
3. they’ve been the proverbial ugly duckling until very recently
this is important, because the fact that they weren’t getting any rhythm before they got “hot” creates an inherent b*tch*ssness that permeates everything they do.
4. they’re only friends with other diva dudes
all DD’s are close friends with between one and four other diva dudes, a safe number which gives them a couple clubbing and tailor trip buddies, but not so many that their diva light doesn’t shine as bright. remember, these ain’t alpha dogs or lone wolves, just a bunch of beta d*cks thirsty for attention.
basically, this is the type of guy whose d*ck would get harder at the thought of a chick at the mall double-taking while he’s walking past her and jigging audi keys in his hand than it would if he actually slept with her.
5. they’re not chivalrous and proud of it
there’s nothing else that screams “diva dude” louder than a grown man who’s practically excited to get the opportunity to let everyone else know all the simple sh*t they’d never do for a woman.
“pay for dinner??? trick, please. what i look like buying you appetizers and water and sh*t when you don’t even swallow??? plus, you make like 31g’s a year!!! you’re telling me you can’t afford to buy your own damn iced tea???”
part of being a grown man is doing the right thing without any expectation of acknowledgment or reward, but a typical DD will voluntarily and happily relinquish a crucial component of his own manhood just because some janky broad or two didn’t immediately fellate him when he gave up his seat for her on the train seven years ago.
6. they LOVE to scapegoat
words such as “all” and “every” always seem to find a way into their sentences when speaking negatively about the opposite sex, a common practice used by folks so blinded by bitterness that they can’t see how foolish a statement such as “all black women with master’s degrees give terrible bl*w jobs” really is (even if it might be true).
7. they’re delusional
there’s nothing a DD loathes more than actually admitting that he’s a DD, a phenomenon which produces some of the most hilariously misguided attempts of synonym use known to man.
from “practical” and “prudent” to “rational” and “realistic”, a typical DD will have an endless supply of words and euphemisms that make his DIVA-ness sound much less harsh
“i’m not bitter. far from it. i’m just ahead of the curve.”
8. they’re in a ton of f*cking party pictures
diva dudes love posing in pictures at parties more than fat asians love pumas. seriously, if you’re ever at a mixer or happy hour somewhere and you’re looking for a diva dude, just find the ridiculously overdressed cat faux ice-grilling a camera while clutching a mojito.
9. they pledged a graduate chapter of a fraternity
trust me.
10. they don’t actually date
instead of actual dates, diva dudes only interact with women they’re interested in through “meet-ups”; courting arrangements specifically designed to alibi them out of any expectation or accountability. saying sh*t like “let’s chill sometime.“ instead of “friday, i’m gonna take u to da movies” is an affected verbal manipulation allowing them to reap the benefits of a commitment without actually committing to anything. there’s a reason God hates lawyers.
admittedly, there is a certain allure to living this lifestyle. not so much in the DD actions, but in the figurative thumbing of the nose at all the nightline-esque stats and sistas stating that you’re extinct. but, despite the attraction to this state of mind, you have to remember that these are the dudes who probably will end up like champ kind from anchorman when they reach 40…single, lonely, and unable to function without the aid of his crew of like-minded relationship nincompoops, and all sistas (and brothas) should avoid them at all costs.
—the champ
***this was originally posted two years ago, but a conversation with facebook fame lydia cotton yesterday convinced me to revise and enha
So that’s the guy that’s in all of my pictures…I don’t know you, I didn’t invite you. How the heck did you get in ALL of my pictures?
camera clicks are like dog whistles to diva dudes. they can hear them 60 yards away
Damn, like that? Well, sadly I know a coupld DDs. SMH
This was the first post I read from you guys way back. It’s still all true, unfortunately…lol Dah well.
“This was the first post I read from you guys way back”
this makes me all verklempt and sh*t.
@Champie
Aw…look at you…lol
hey everybody,new here, what does ‘verklempt’ (don’t know if i spelled that right) mean?
oh, all the people on here are fun!!! (fun=funny therefore FUN)
Yidish for emotionally unable to respond clearly.
The article was pretty humorous. I was down with it till
man/the right thing = pay for women.
I could write a counter response on how black women love to tell black men what a black man is even though statistically they have never been with one… of if they had one or one interested at some point they probably dogged him out.
Go on for hours asking how it is a woman in general could know how to instruct a man in being a man or why black men never tell a black woman how to be a woman.
But it would fall on deafened, indoctrinated, lonely ears wouldn’t it.
Man this post is on point.
Let’s get a slow clap going for the post, especially #3 and especially if he was a chunky
For some reasons formerly chunky dudes, especially if chunky during the formative jr high years, are full of
Bytcha$$ness
For some reasons formerly chunky dudes, especially if chunky during the formative jr high years, are full of
Bytcha$$ness
i had something to say, but this comment really just makes me want a chunky bar now
“defining the ‘diva dude’”
read: the Kappa
@ P…iGiggle
Madame Z, you ain’t neva lied about them red and white sticks. I wish I had read this post a few years ago when I got caught up with a DD. I live in DC so you know I know. This whole post is dead on, Champ.
@Mello Yellow
Im in DC too and this place is flooded with DDs. Yuk!
Absolutely, He shoulda added twirling red-and-white sticks.
As I was reading I immediately pictured a guy I know from undergrad that entails all of these qualities, and what would you know, he’s a kappa.
read: the Kappa
especially if he pledged grad chapter (#9). those DDs are in a class of their own…
LOL!! I know this dude. He was borderline DD before pledging, then he pledged Kappa grad chapter, and all hell broke loose. What’s funny, he actually convinced some chick to seriously date him. Granted, she’s a Delta, but she still should know better. j/k. lol.
Ummm…>insert sad face, then blank stare, then happy facechokesfinger snap<*
Long story short…I wish a mickey fickey WOULD!!!
#1—- I am still forwarding this post! BEST POST EVER
#2—- Kappa’s + DC = King’s of the Diva Dudes
they are definitely Alphas in this pack as well. #shots? maybe. LOL
they are definitely Alphas in this pack as well. #shots? maybe. LOL
This is sooo true. lol.
@ Reecie,
I have to cosign on those Alphas… atleast we expect such behaviors from Kappas…but the Diva Dude epidemic as no frat labels anymore… just a Kappa spokesman
Definitely #shots!! lol!
What’s up with kappa s?
“defining the ‘diva dude’”
“Read: Kappa”
Doesn’t pledging a fraternity period, beget DD b*tch*ssness?
If this ain’t the friggin’ TRUTH! As I was reading this, about 3, nope, make that 4 dudes came to mind. Number 9, in your list cinched it! This was soooooooo on point! You also helped me put my finger on and gave me a friggin’ LIST of why folks feel a certain kind of way about those cats. I know you said you re-vamped this and you posted this before, but I am glad it’s here. This was an excellent post. Dang, I’m all enthused by the truth in it!
see, the next step is to start naming names. we should have a diva dude directory on vsb
@The Champ
Great idea! (desperately looking for a pen to begin jotting down my contributions to the list)
All of the Trey’s I’ve ever known are DD’s..allnem
“All of the Trey’s I’ve ever know are DD’s…allnem” #DOA
trigga trey songz, anyone???
I was at an event last. . . . [I always hope to run into you- but how would I know--- I look for a name tag that say "The Champ"-- it won't happen] I DIGRESS— and I ran into this Diva Dude, I kept thinking Ohhh I wish the VSB comment section was here—- I would like to add:
Jason …….. to the list.
BUT really. . . when I was sitting in my census training today and I just started thinking about this post and it made me smile. . . and chuckle until the facilitator asked me if I wanted to share with the class. . . I had to decline. LOL!!
Can I PLEASE head up the Chicago of the DDAA (Diva Dude Awareness Alliance)?!?! Many men in Chicago already hate to pay without something in return, your number, your virginity, your first born. Add diva dudes to the mix and a hot mess is born.
Living in a Navy town, I can tell you that the DD doesn’t have to have a degree. Most of the Navy men out here are exactly as described, minus the degree and believe that most of the women around here drop panties the minute they mention that they’re in the Navy.
@SaneN85
I would challenge that Navy men are like that. My ex-husband is a Navy man and I used to be surrounded by them. Mostly they are just insecure guys with job security; not DDs. (plus, they don’t meet most of what’s on VSB the list)
I welcome the challenge. I’m not saying that all men in the Navy are DD, but in my experience there is a large percentage of them. They usually don’t fall into 1, 2 or 9, but the rest of the lists defines a large number of men that I know. The attitude is the same, even if the education isn’t. Your ex may not have been, and may have chosen to associate with only those guys in the Navy who aren’t, but I promise you there are a large number of them.
It may also just be that these men are imports from all over the continental U.S. and the women here have them believing they’re something special because they’re new.
Okay, going through the comments, I’m getting more of a kind of pretty boy vibe of what DD is supposed to mean. I still stand by my claim that a lot of Navy men fall into the article above, but looking through the comments, they may just get a pass. This time.
@Sanen85
“It may also just be that these men are imports from all over the continental U.S. and the women here have them believing they’re something special because they’re new”
This part of your statement was exactly how I viewed them (Navy guys) when I was married and living in San Diego. Most of them were dudes that nobody was checkin for back where they were from; but when they moved to a new area it was an opportunity to reinvent themselves. But I do agree that they can have some of the DD qualities.
Ol’ dude in the middle looks like someone I would’ve had a major crush on when I was in highschool.
*hindsight is 20/20 sigh*
You liked them DeBarge/Al B. Sure types back in the day, I see…
“Types”, yes.
@Cheekie & Muze
How or why did you stop liking these “Types”? Or do you still dig them? I’ve kicked it with a few woman that use to be into these cats before me. I would think to myself “what do you want with my roughneck @ss?”. How do you go from El DeBarge to the polar opposite. The women always seem attracted to them from pre-teen to early 20s. I’ve always found this change to be peculiar.
“How or why did you stop liking these “Types”? Or do you still dig them?”
i’ve found that some women tend to grow out of that (crushing over pretty boys) once they start actually having sex.
“How or why did you stop liking these “Types”? Or do you still dig them? I’ve kicked it with a few woman that use to be into these cats before me. I would think to myself “what do you want with my roughneck @ss?”.”
I’m not even sure. I don’t think I wanna say that pretty boys are less “masculine”, because a man can be somewhat pretty and still be pretty rough, but I just think it was plain ol’ growin’ up. I think of this way. Just as my personal style (i.e. fashion) has changed since I was in high school (I’m more comfortable with being a bit more girly), so has my taste in men. I don’t exclude the prettier boys totally, but I don’t fawn over them as much as I did before either. I’ve just widened my spectrum.
@The Champ,
Um, I don’t ‘preciate you up and changing the post picture on me. Now no one know wtf I’m referring to except for the vampire crew that was here last night.
What happened? Did one of the diva dudes email you talmbout “I’d be much obliged if you took that sh*t of me off the internets” so you decided to go with the much safer choice of celebs?
lol. my ex completely and totally turned me against pretty boys.
i don’t mean men that dress well or care about grooming. i mean men who literally wear the banner of ‘pretty’ proudly and have perfectly arched eyebrows. ew. i mean, you can eliminate the bert look, but please don’t let me catch you ‘trimming’ your eyebrows. out of hand.
anyhoo… i dated a man that was TOTALLY the opposite of the ‘pretty’ look i’d so coveted in my younger days, and i guess it kind of just showed me what i’d been missing by limiting myself. so now, i’m much less particular about the kind of man i will and won’t date when it comes to surface things like that. i think it’s just a part of the becoming a grown woman process… similar to men realizing that every LSLH (lightskin longhair) chick isn’t automatically aaliyah’s doppelganger. live and you learn. lol.
it happened to me….
ME TOO girl, don’t feel bad.
shoot, my ex i was with from HS to college was basically, him. lol.
Do men like this even like women?? I always found this behavior mad suspect. Like they just used misogyny to hide their *ahem* deeper issues.
Hi Champ! *waves* I met you and your lady at the house party 2 weeks ago. I was the one asking all the questions about VSB
I KNOW YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LOL.
YAY! Hi T.!!! I’m finally here, lol.
Do men like this even like women?? I always found this behavior mad suspect. Like they just used misogyny to hide their *ahem* deeper issues.
I think Champ needs to revise this post again and add this truth to the list.
Thats a very good question dear.
welcome and sh*t, andi
and yeah, typically these guys are oxymorons: heterosexuals who hate women.
SO TRUE!!! Deeper issues! Wonder post today.
*Wonderful
OMFG!!!! @ Champ I tried to explain the concept of hetero’s who hate women to a few folks. they looked and came at me like I was crazy! Aside from this post being dead on, that comment just made my month and shit!
That’s what I assumed as well. I thought it would be something they would outgrow.
“5. they’re not chivalrous and proud of it”
Whenever I encounter a man like this, it never ceases to amaze me. Until college I was used to opening my own doors (unless it was a special occasion) and going dutch. But, once I got down to HIU and met men who won’t let me open doors and I have to trick to treat them to a meal, I can’t comprehend why any man would live a non-chivalrous life.
As a man, I definitely feel you. I can’t believe that some men don’t do that and it makes it where a lot of women don’t know when a man is being chivalrous because they are not used to it. Some women don’t even know how to say thank you when a man opens a door for them. That’s how bad it has gotten.
PREACH ComicBookGuy! I took this chick to the movies and held the door open and she freakin stood there. I was like ummm are you going to walk through the door? She looked at me bewildered and I thought damn has a ninja never opened a door for this girl?!?! Smh.
I’ve experienced this as well. The worse is when you open the door and they respond with, “I can open my own door,” said matter-of-factly. *smh*
Hell, naw.
YOU go right ahead and keep opening the door!!!!! SMH!! I have to laugh when I accidentally open and hold the door for the DD’s (I will open the door for anyone by the way- I just like courteous people. . . ) and they let the door slam in my face. When are one or all of ya’ll taking me out????
I agree…I mean I know how to say thank you when a door is opened.
But if he opened my car door or some ish, I might perish and die right there.
Wait, you mean, a guy hasn’t opened a car door for you? What wrong with the ninjas nowadays? I even open the door for my niece when she rides in the car with me, just so she is used to it. If a ninja wants to take her on a date and doesn’t open the door for her, cross him off the list.
*shakes head* nope…I’m trying to remember a time when a guy did this and I can’t come up w/ one.
Damn! Never? That sucks. I dated a guy who ALWAYS opened the car door for me. Didnt matter if it was 100 degrees outside or negative 5, he was opening my door and putting me in the car first. If only dudes knew how many poon points they got for this, they’d all be running to the passenger side!
If only dudes knew how many poon points they got for this, they’d all be running to the passenger side!
WORD! My roomie told me how she went on a date w/ this guy and he stood up when she returned from the bathroom….I think I blacked out after she told me this b/c I couldn’t believe my ears
Co-sign. I wish they knew about the poon points. I’m seeing someone now who has always been VERY chivalrous.
Aside from doing the big things, he does some little things that say a whole lot -that he’s considering me 1st- and is enthusiastically rewarded by never having to ask for a BJ or sex- time and mother nature permitting.
The Libra in me says its only fair AND, it is definitely a turn on to be with someone who gives you that red carpet treatment no matter what.
Good behavior Good behavior.
LaBakir,
Really? Y’all need to move to the south… right now.
@ Sula
I know right,lol
@ Sula.
Yep.
I never thought that was a regional thing though. Wowwwww…
“Some women don’t even know how to say thank you when a man opens a door for them. That’s how bad it has gotten.”.
yeah. this is one of the unfortunate by-products of emaciated chivalry
I love, I love, I love my HIU…
This post and these comments makeup the twisted horror story of my dating life! I believe the Champ pretty accurately described about 80% of the eligible men…ahem I mean boys at UF…the remaining 20% being the utterly untouchable (you know the ones with peg-legs, raspy voices, and ish like that). I’ve come to terms with this mess and I’m only 18! I’m alarmed, and I’m steering clear of DDs!…but one thing is for sure my next boyfriend will probably have a peg leg.
P.S. F*** Kappas.
*Hampton Hug*
The Diva Dudes is definately an epidemic…since moving to DC I have tried to find a perfect word or phrase to describe these creatures and I must thank you Champikicans for DIVA DUDES!. Moving out here from NYC I am not use to men who upon meeting me introduce their profession to me before I got their names, bytch I know black lawyers, doctors, and crackheads alike ur nothing new to me. The attire of a Diva Dudes usually consisst of the imfamous “blazer” a Diva Dude wouldn’t be caught dead outside without a blazer..I even spotted one such Diva Dude at the gym sporting a blazer…huh?!… Thank you for giving me permission to ASSASSINATE THEM WITH A QUICK NYC side-eye glare
You got to be joking about a dude w/ a blazer in the gym. He prolly had a curly gel frow too. Next time i hope he catches fire for that
Had to de Lurk
I had a co worker male buy his best male DD a pair of slacks and i am gay and and dont do shit like that.
This is hilarious! Not buying his friend a pair of slacks? Bwahahaha!
Thank you for giving me permission to ASSASSINATE THEM WITH A QUICK NYC side-eye glare
that’s not enough. the next time you see them you need to just shoot em. we’ll even cover your legal fees
i wish you would have re-vamped this a couple of months ago before i fell for a #3. he tricked me ya’ll…he turned into a #3 which caught my attention (because i don’t remember ever looking him directly in the eye before) and i was thinking he still had the “ugly duckling personality” until after a couple of convo’s i realized he had turned into a full blown DD. tahwell the world wouldnt turn on it’s axis if the champ said it and it doesn’t happen.
tahwell the world wouldnt turn on it’s axis if the champ said it and it doesn’t happen
i wanna say thanks for the compliment, but im not sure what that was.
*superextradead*
@the champ…i wanna say thanks for the compliment, but im not sure what that was.
i was sleepy…take the compliment ; )
Might I suggest some possible add-ons or variations
11. Some of them are chivalrous (or pretend to be), for the sake of perpetuating the idea that they are the creme de la creme, and that you should be grateful to be in their presence.
12. They refer to themselves as “quality people”.
13. In addition to the one or two male friends (associates) they have, they are usually acquainted with an overwhelming variety of self-esteem (or otherwise) lacking female friends.
14. They’re always talking about what the hell they don’t eat or where they don’t shop. Not because of political support/solidarity of some sort or genuine health concerns, but because not eating “x,y,z” is what the hoi poloi do.
What’s really messed up is what dating (or kinda dating, or whatever) one of the fools says about the woman involved.
It doesn’t have to say anything about the woman. It could be her first time exposed to this nonsense, in which case she gets a “get out of jail free” pass…but only one
13!!!!!!
man i have to raise the amen hand on that one. most Diva Dudes, or Divos as my friends and i call them, are extra surrounded by ego-inflators who seriously need some type of Love Yourself camp.
…and i can see a sarcastic joke coming out of my last few words so i will say i am clearly talking about self-esteem, Champ. lol
gotta co-sign on your number 11. i think sometimes it’s the exact opposite of what champ described.
14. They’re always talking about what the hell they don’t eat or where they don’t shop. Not because of political support/solidarity of some sort or genuine health concerns, but because not eating “x,y,z” is what the hoi poloi do.
i was thinking about adding “is extremely particular” to the list, but i didn’t want liz to get an aneurysm for going past 1000 words
14…but because eating or buying “x,y,z” is what the hoi poloi do.
I can;t stand these dudes. I got a few to add before I go to bed. I will riff about these bird @ss ninjas later on.
4a) They don’t have male friends just male associates at best. A lt of them don’t have male friends.
11) Bobby Valentino
12) They tend to only date “hi-lite h*es”
13) They stay clean 24/7. Most dudes let the beard wolf occasionally or ain’t to concerned with their appearance. Not these pretty boys. They also buy Duke, S-Curl, and Sportin Waves products at Sam’s Club and Costco.
15) They wear dress shoes with jeans
LMBO at dress shoes with jeans. that is a definite sign for him to exit stage left. immediately.
GIRL, that is a next situation!!!! I always LOVED men who didn’t take themselves too seriously. The dress shoes with jeans thing makes me feel that he so serious.
DID YOU SAY S-CURL?!?!?!?!?!?! HILARIOUS!
@Humble_One, I’m interested in reading your riff later, but I can already peep an inkling from what you listed and …Yup!
“15) They wear dress shoes with jeans”
LMBO-That’s exactly what a wear when i head to events asking for “Semi-Formal” or “Dressy Casual”
“They also buy Duke, S-Curl, and Sportin Waves products at Sam’s Club and Costco.”
Which only shows how much a diva a dude can be. We all know a can of Sportin’ Waves,Duke, or any other negro specific pomade will last several lifetimes. Hell, I think I have the tin of pomade that my granddaddy carried around at Ft. Riley Kansas during WWII locked awayed somewhere.
Hell, I think I have the tin of pomade that my granddaddy carried around at Ft. Riley Kansas during WWII locked awayed somewhere
Dead and in heaven next to my own granddaddy. Bwahahaha!
“15) They wear dress shoes with jeans”
hey! there’s nothing wrong with me rocking my black dress manboots with jeans! they go with my hoodie, and they make me like a quarter inch taller than regular shoes do
Amen at the dress shoes with jeans!
Sorry mine is a little more on the behavior side— but in my opinion THE WORST!!!
16. They speak about serving. . . ie volunteering YET they do no service
Snowflake to DD “hey, I have all these young black male that I am tryin’ to connect with services- I also need some mentors are you interested?”
DD: “Naw, I just don’t have time. . . ”
REALLY??? You had time to pick me up- time to put that outfit together, time to go shopping. . .
Sorry– it puts me OVER-the-EDGE
***Side-eye you weren’t expecting glare. . .
“twirling blue and white sticks” and “they pledged a graduate chapter of a fraternity”
yes and yes. damn you’re on fire this week. All these excellent points and ish.
damn you’re on fire this week
i know. i’ve been meaning to take care of that. why you gotta put my business in the street?
My bad Powder, I apologize.
A DD will usually walk around with sunglasses. You can tell the DD apart from other regular folk who also own sunglasses by the fact that the DD wears his sunglasses over his eyes when he is INSIDE and hangs them off his shirt when he is OUTSIDE.
They also only shop at H&M, Express, or any place that charges $45 for tight shirts/button-ups that they use to accentuate their muscles, a need that stems from #3.
Yes. That is why ol’ boy on the far left of the pic looks like he cutting off his circulation in that shirt around the arm area. Plus, I doubt he can button that bad boy.
Dang…they switched up pictures on us, so this comment makes no sense now. For shame. LOL!
I agree. Dudes with glasses on in the club are NOT cool! Maybe the glasses hide their insecurities. No one can see their eyes and so no one really knows what’s going on.
Maybe the glasses hide their insecurities. No one can see their eyes and so no one really knows what’s going on.
Prime reason it has been said “the eyes are windows to the soul” . Ain’t nuthin’ but truth in it.
this has nothing to do with anything, but it’s so weird that when PJ’s week is here i miss Champ’s style of writing, and when Champ’s is here i miss PJ’s. why do i notice this? gosh. issues. lol. only a writer would think like i do. i swear.
anyhoo. soooo i’m going to go ahead and take the credit for inspiring that Bangs link. lmbo. i knew it was that before i even clicked it. man. still cracks me up.
… i’d give you a hug for this post but i’m anti-body contact with bloggers so i’ll just say thank you. lol … i am sooooo sick of these types of men. whew. around here we call them Divos.
in any case, i reeeeeally hope the dudes in that pic happen to read VSB. really really hope so. lmbo. i need to read a DD comment to this.
thing is, i always get hit on by these types of dudes because i’m a sucker for a guy who dresses well/stylishly. and they usually do. so, while i may be admiring the shirt he’s wearing, he thinks i’m giving some kind of bat signal to come holla. ummm nothankyou. i like a man who knows what looks good on him, but not someone who is more meticulous about his clothes and hair than i am. ew. these are the types of dudes who don’t own a pair of basketball shorts and all their t-shirts are brand new. ew. i’ma need you to have a favorite shirt from wayback that no one can make you throw away. says a lot about a man’s character. seriously. lol. i don’t trust a man whose chill clothes are all designer or brand new. definitely screams Divo.
but, i digress. lol.
hey, what’s wrong with grad chapter.
and LMBO at still rocking FUBU. *dead*
good recycled post Mr.Champ.
“this has nothing to do with anything, but it’s so weird that when PJ’s week is here i miss Champ’s style of writing, and when Champ’s is here i miss PJ’s. why do i notice this? gosh. issues. lol. only a writer would think like i do. i swear.”
Ditto!
PJ’s week is here i miss Champ’s style of writing, and when Champ’s is here i miss PJ’s. why do i notice this?
we have completely different writing styles, so that makes sense. whats funny to me is when people get us mixed up, because that means they obviously don’t read anything here other than the entry titles and sh*t in bold, lol
…well even the entry titles give it away though. it’s not hard to notice one person uses capitalization and the other doesn’t. lol
Been lurking for some time but had to join just to thank Champ for this one. Having run across a few too many of these sorry characters, I totally agree with your list.
All I can add to the DD profile is this:
1. They reek of mama’s-boy-itis,
2. They spend more time in the mirror than most women and are constantly checking themselves and,
3. They leave their socks and wristwatch on when they’re trying to hit it.
I’m guessing they secretly hate women. Thankfully I can spot ‘em now, and ignore ‘em.
…*dead* @ “socks and wristwatch”. ROFL!
You know the chex is going to be terrible if a man keeps his watch on. lol!
“Been lurking for some time but had to join just to thank Champ for this one. Having run across a few too many of these sorry characters, I totally agree with your list”
welcome and sh*t
…..but the bugged out part, is that alot of women in the post have fallen for this. Sigh. The saga continues…
Bond.
(Simultaneously ducks head, and lifts hand.)
“Mah bad.”
1. They reek of mama’s-boy-itis,
2. They spend more time in the mirror than most women and are constantly checking themselves and,
3. They leave their socks and wristwatch on when they’re trying to hit it.
I can only call an Amen from the Altar of truth. I know this diva dude, matter of fact I dated this DD… This DD is usually a sucker for a “well-connected” girl who can introduce him to “circles”… He is insecure to the nth degree… and can also often be found in or around the DMV area… *smh*
The “ninja’s and flies” tag is hilarity! It’s the cherry on top!
I wonder if Pastors can be a part of this clique? From all appearances, I’d have to say that Bishop Eddie Long may very well belong! His shirts ARE cutting off his circulation, and recently he’s gotten either a wig, a lacefront, hair transplants or have been ODing on some rogaine!
Lord hab mussy!
Of course preachers can be included on this list. The cheap suits, tons of attention from desperate women, the caddy keys, and the on-demand list of glittering generalities of what people want to hear make them a shoe in.
I wonder if Pastors can be a part of this clique?
definitely.
um….this post makes me want to do a churchhouse victory lap around the comment box.
piggybacking on the idea that d.d.’s brag about not being chivalrous, a diva dude is also proud of his ability to win even the pettiest of arguments with a woman–any woman–by calling said woman out of her name, steppin to her in a “what chu wanna do?” type fashion (where he is not too proud to use his weak a*s, nonexistent physical power for a sad ass attempt at intimidation), and raising his voice to feminine octaves. the diva dude doesn’t understand why the non-bitch man chooses to bow out of petty arguments. because the diva dude, while highly educated, is ignorant to the ways of life and how the world must work.
LMAO @ “um….this post makes me want to do a churchhouse victory lap around the comment box.”
That just made my night, thank you.
Good additions.
Based on some of the descriptions provided, I am a DD. I shop at H&M, Express, and Banana, I only wear loafers, boat shoes, and maybe chucks or K-Swiss with jeans, I stay in the mirror(since I have mirrors in the bedroom, this includes during sex), just got my J.D. from USC and now work for a firm in L.A., and am quite aware of what women assume to be a shortage of good black men. I also do not believe in being chivalrous to EVERY chick I’m dating/hanging out with. There are chicks that literally salivate whenever I mention that I am a lawyer at a firm in downtown Los Angeles.
@GQ
“Based on some of the descriptions provided, I am a DD. I shop at H&M, Express, and Banana, I only wear loafers, boat shoes, and maybe chucks or K-Swiss with jeans”
Express for men? Are you joking? I never heard of a man shopping there. All of those stores specialize in smedium clothes. K-Swiss? There are men that wear K-Swiss? Do you drive a small luxury car or small luxury SUV? I am going to assume this comment is a joke laced with sarcasm.
LMAO!!! Me and my bro had a convo about Express b/c he was mad he can’t fit the clothes…he’s 6’4 and muscular
The K-Swiss threw me for a loop too. Haven’t heard anyone talk about those since 96′
@LaBakir
If you are a grown man with a chest and broad shoulders you can’t shop in those store. I could be wrong but I am just going off what I see in the windows. I don’t know what grown man wants his clothes fitting snug. You are right I haven’t heard of anyone wear K-Swiss since about 96. And even back then they were considered shoes for women.
And even back then they were considered shoes for women.
Yup…and 2520 males
If you are a grown man with a chest and broad shoulders you can’t shop in those store.
EXACTLY and my bro is a big dude…those shirts would probably fit me perfectly…but a grown man who wants to be able to move freely…not so much
@Humble_One and LaBakir,
White, Classic, Crisp K-Swiss in Cali are like 54/11′s ($54.11′s, cause they cost $54.11 with tax) for women on the East Coast or Air Force One’s. It’s a classic white shoe that still goes hard on the West Coast. It’s like East Coast guys still wearing those tan Timberland boots…even in the summer… or women wearing Parasuco jeans in DC.
LMAO @ Parasuco….smh
“I haven’t heard of anyone wear K-Swiss since about 96.”
exactly. I wore some k-swiss to school in 9th grade, around 1998/99, and they clowned the hell out of my ass. ALL DAY. so they’ve def. been out of fashion for a minute. hell, maybe they’re back in style now because that’s how long they’ve been out of style.
@legitimate_soul
so now i’m going to be rapping “54/11 size seven in girls… babyface, she would look like she was 11 with curls..” all day because of you. lol.
buuut i never knew why they were called 54-11s. so thanks.
I always assumed that only those interracial break dance crews from that magically inserted into fast food commercials were the only people who actually wore them.
I guess I just got learnt!
“The K-Swiss threw me for a loop too. Haven’t heard anyone talk about those since 96?”
I had a girl friend mention them a couple weeks ago and I said well, I guess those are better than reebok classics. smh. lol
this is so funny bc i had a girlfriend who went out on a blind date once and dude showed up wearing Reebok Classics. i will never forget how hard i laughed at the conversation following that date. she clowned him up one side and down the other.
he will forever and always be known as ‘Classics’. lmbo.
LMAO!!! I was thinking that! Classics are the worse!!!!
Smh…wear some chancletas. there’s no returning from classics.
What’s in his heart is better than what’s on his feet ladies. A jerk in expensive shoes is still a jerk. Exactly why I don’t date DD or DD wannabees.
hey hey hey now… i heart H&M and Express clothes for men. there is nothing wrong with shopping there. all men aren’t built like football players, and i’m willing to bet you’ve never actually tried on anything from any of those stores… i’m sure and XL or XXL would fit you just fine. nothing wrong with dressing nice. i think there is a definite difference between being a Divo and being aware of what you look good in.
@Muze
Banana Republic actually has good clothes. So I won’t diss them. I just can’t do Express.
Express Men isn’t that bad–its just the former Structure, which used to have NICE stuff for men. I think the Express affiliation makes folks think its funboy exclusive now but they do make decent stuff–well they used to when I shopped there for my ex. My current SO aint messing with that ish, lol.
H&M and Express are cool…but I def think they cater to a certain size man. Not that the clothes don’t look good, but if you’re not a pretty slim guy…it’s a no go
Just like certain clothin lines for women…or jeans…etc.
@LaBakir
“H&M and Express are cool…but I def think they cater to a certain size man. Not that the clothes don’t look good, but if you’re not a pretty slim guy…it’s a no go”
Exactly. My brother is skinny but he isn’t frail and he doesn’t like those clothes either. If you have any type of muscle they will fit snug. Some guys like their chest poking out their sweaters. I’m straight on it. You can buy clothes that fit and don’t look too big. If I can’t wear an undershirt underit it is too small.
@Muze
” i heart H&M and Express clothes for men. there is nothing wrong with shopping there. all men aren’t built like football players, and i’m willing to bet you’ve never actually tried on anything from any of those stores”
Their clothes aren’t my style. I prefer Brooks Brothers. And I’ve been to Express men once with my ex and I haven’t set foot in that store since. Some clothes you don’t have to try on to know the fit. It’s like Prada a lot of these other high-end designers. They cut their clothes small. A lot of dudes including me don’t like their shirts snug in the underarm area or the the crotch area tight.
@Humble_One
“Some clothes you don’t have to try on to know the fit. It’s like Prada a lot of these other high-end designers. They cut their clothes small. A lot of dudes including me don’t like their shirts snug in the underarm area or the the crotch area tight.”
Agreed. Some men are either suffocating or looking like the incredible hulk-ready to explode out of their clothes!
LOL at me going on the brooks brothers site to see your style. okay okay. i can roll with BB. i had you dressing like 50 Cent or Lil Wayne or some other wayward ninja the way you were going in on ol boy. lol
true some of H&M, BR, and Express clothes are cut smaller, and it’s def not a good look to have the male version of muffinness going on. so, i’ll agree. no crotch and underarm chaffing, please.
hey hey hey now… i heart H&M and Express clothes for men. there is nothing wrong with shopping there. all men aren’t built like football players, and i’m willing to bet you’ve never actually tried on anything from any of those stores… i’m sure and XL or XXL would fit you just fine. nothing wrong with dressing nice. i think there is a definite difference between being a Divo and being aware of what you look good in.
i agree, to a certain point. i think you can find certain pieces in those stores (a blazer, a tie on sale, etc), but, for the most part, only certain type of men exclusively shop at h&m and express.
@Muze
“LOL at me going on the brooks brothers site to see your style. okay okay. i can roll with BB. i had you dressing like 50 Cent or Lil Wayne or some other wayward ninja the way you were going in on ol boy. lol”
LMAO. Word? Lil Wayne? I guess that’s better than Bishop Don “Magic” Juan. I’m not surprised you thought this. Most people either see you dressing like an Express, H&M, 4 Men, or Soulja Boy mannequin. My style of dress is different. I was wearing sweaters and jeans before the Kanye/grown and sexy thing. People made fun of me for dressing that way. The difference is the type of sweaters. I don’t do the thin tight sweaters. I went to private school for most of my education so I am a prep to a certain degree.
“wayward ninja”
Can I nominate the term “wayward ninja” to be placed into the VSB glossary?
There’s a difference between clothes that are fitted to your body and clothes that are too tight. I work in a profession where clothes hanging off of me wouldn’t be appropriate. Go into express, banana republic, or H&M. The clothes there are made to fit your body, not make it look like you are 10-15 pounds heavier than you are. As far as K-Swiss, are you really telling me that you rock J’s or airforce 1′s outside of a basketball court? Seriously? And you’re over the age of 18?
@GQ
“As far as K-Swiss, are you really telling me that you rock J’s or airforce 1’s outside of a basketball court? Seriously? And you’re over the age of 18?”
Not to say you are one but this is the type of thing Diva Dudes say. I do wear J’s. I didn’t grow up before the 80s so I wear sneakers. And I don’t wear XXXXL jeans and white tees. I don’t think that has any bearing on who I am as a person. Frankly I find 95 Air Max more comfortable than Kenneth Cole. If I’m a 34 waist I will not be comfortable in 34 pants. I have to let my pants sit low just a tad bit. Not sagging put not at my belly button either.
@ Humble_One
*swoons*
The world needs more guys like you
No but we are telling you that we dont rock K-Swiss. You can get you some Creative Recreations from Nordstrom or Bloomingdales though homie. Or cop a pair of lacoste joints. Anything but K swiss, so please dont “put your spin on it”
yay for Creative Recreations! love those shoes.
I am all kinds of late to this post and just catching up on the comments. But this right here “No but we are telling you that we dont rock K-Swiss. ” made me laugh hard and loud for a good two minutes. I laughed so hard, I had to get up and walk away from my desk.
“Go into express, banana republic, or H&M”
i dont know if i’d put banana republic in the same category as those other two.
Yep… Banana Republic is not necessarily on par with H&M and Express…. Zara is more in line with BR…
Based on some of the descriptions provided, I am a DD. I shop at H&M, Express, and Banana, I only wear loafers, boat shoes, and maybe chucks or K-Swiss with jeans, I stay in the mirror(since I have mirrors in the bedroom, this includes during sex), just got my J.D. from USC and now work for a firm in L.A., and am quite aware of what women assume to be a shortage of good black men. I also do not believe in being chivalrous to EVERY chick I’m dating/hanging out with. There are chicks that literally salivate whenever I mention that I am a lawyer at a firm in downtown Los Angeles.
everything else is cool, but these two…
“I also do not believe in being chivalrous to EVERY chick I’m dating/hanging out with”
“I stay in the mirror(since I have mirrors in the bedroom, this includes during sex)”
…sealed the deal. you’re definitely a diva dude.
welcome and sh*t, btw
Just a question: Do you tell people upon meeting them what school you just got a degree from and that you specifically work for a law firm in downtown LA? If so, that may be a dead giveaway that you’re a diva dude.
And also prolly a bit of a pretentious a**. Just saying.
tee hee hee hee
Yep, definite DD…
Oh yeah: although I had a hard time suppressing my eye roll while readin’ the brotha’s self-description, I had an even harder time suppressing a nose crinkle while reading jousts over what’s in, what’s not, blah blah blah. I’m even more appalled at having read most of it.
Oh yeah, Bishop Long is married, but still…he looks the part.
I used to date a guy like this but he was so pretty, I didn’t notice
welcome and sh*t
* Highlarious- thanks for this……great post, right now somewhere there is a pack of diva dudes madatchu for putting this out there, but we preciate you for this..I feel so much better prepared now
….Good Lookin Out Champ *
somewhere there is a pack of diva dudes madatchu for putting this out there, but we preciate you for this
yeah. i did notice a bunch of dudes in skinny jeans ice-grilling me this morning, but i thought that was just because i was reading an esquire
The picture looks just like the CIAA pics my boys posted on Facebook. (Their Agent of M.E. status will have to be reviewed.)
I’ll add a few other tell tale signs.
The DD is a fan of Sean Combs’ body of “work”. Everything from his “swagger” to his sh*tty music.
They wear shades inside.
If you are hanging out with one of their frat they will automatically assume you’re frat too. This leads to them trying to grip you up or down or whatever it’s called. This is when you flash them a look telling then to spare the negro hand jive.
Their name is Kanye West.
They are “on” all the time. Ninja, is that your personality or a script?
I’ll check in later with more.
Your entire response has me LMBAO seriously….thanks for that , but this right here “This is when you flash them a look telling then to spare the negro hand jive.”- …I’M DONE
I hate that sh*t. Some them don’t realize that their other frat brothers are capable of actually making friends outside of that sh*t. Feeling on my rists like Ray Charles and sh*t! Your pops didn’t teach you to shake hands with another man like that… or maybe he did. I might be onto something.
*I know it’s coming, I’m getting FIRED today..because this right here made my cube neighbor..(office slang for cell-mate ) ask me what was wrong …in my head i actually saw Ray feeling on your rists & now i just can’t stop …seriously …..crying real tears now…lawdhelpmekeepmyjobtoday*
see, now i heart Kanye. i’d marry him and give him babies.
so maybe i just need to bow out of this discussion. y’all are blending too many types of dudes into one category. it ain’t right! lol
oh and this “If you are hanging out with one of their frat they will automatically assume you’re frat too. This leads to them trying to grip you up or down or whatever it’s called. This is when you flash them a look telling then to spare the negro hand jive.”
just made me laugh for like 30 seconds straight. i can’t with the visual.
okay. still laughing! lmbo.
HAHAHAH. I must say I have fallen victim to doing this too. Most of the time I check first but this weekend for example someone brought one of their friends(no homo or so i think) to an alpha convention so naturally i figured the ninja was a bruh. Also if you roll up with 4-5 bruhs and 1 nongreek Imma prolly assume they are frat as well. sorry. *kanye shrug*
“This is when you flash them a look telling then to spare the negro hand jive.”
WOW,you just made my day. I need VSB to come up with a book of quotables.
LMBO….spare me that negro hand jive…..HA!!! I must say this to someone
I will have to forward this to my homies (I love you fellas but…)
I’ll add
onetwo from the my homies’ DD playbook.- Everytime they talk about women, they always use some sort of b-ball analogy “Still recruiting for my team” OR “I think I found my point guard”
- If they actually get into a relationship, and it doesn’t work out, it’s ALWAYS “that bish was crazy” …ALWAYS
And yeah, all them pledged grad, LOL!
y’all are really killin me this morning….i find it quite interesting that the VSB’s as opposed to the VSS’s seem to have the funniest comments on this right here ninja-foolery….I guess cause it would appear that they’re “brangin the gender down” with all this here shite….but alas, i will be smiling all day
Oh my word…I actually had a DD tell me if wasn’t married he would have to make me his Star Player! WTF! If I was single that would NOT be the panty dropper!
so you DON’T want to be a Star Player….LMAO @ the sheer reediculousness of the whole b-ball analogy thing…Dayum DD’s need to get a grip
- Everytime they talk about women, they always use some sort of b-ball analogy “Still recruiting for my team” OR “I think I found my point guard”
you know, i caught myself doing that a couple years ago, and stopped when i realized how douchy it sounded
I do sense a certain superiority lately out and about…I have an SO so I am not really out in the dating pool right now..but, If I have to get back out there..I probably would be very hesitant…these men are so arrogant right now….what they don’t understand is some women would rather be by themselves (and have no problem with it) then deal with this tomfoolishness…..desperation is not my thing. Never has been, never will be…
Good post.
what they don’t understand is some women would rather be by themselves (and have no problem with it) then deal with this tomfoolishness….
EXACTLY!! Where are all the nightline and 20/20 specials on this?!?!
Ever since the original post, “diva dude” has been a part of my lexicon. The description is on point. I also have another name that I call these dudes…”Morehouse men”..lol! No offense to PJ or any other brothas from the college, but y’all know it’s a slew of them there, don’t front. I used to think they had a class on teaching n*ggas how to be like this…lol!
so true! after living in atl for 3 years, i can say that most, not all, (but like 98.456%) of the morehouse men i came across, fit the above description of a DD to a t!
this is sadly true of most of the Morehouse Men i know too. sigh.
i lovededed them though during my Spelman days. whew. couldn’t tell me they weren’t the bomb.com lol
As someone pointed out upthread, Bobby Valentino comes across as a diva dude so I guess we had our share at CAU also.
I have a cousin who is a Morehouse man and a close friend who’s fiance’ is a Morehouse man. Both are cool, genuine, and good men. But one Morehouse man ran up on me in a bar and he came at me so arrogant and crazy……I wish I could tell you how nukkin’ futz he was. So, I can definitely see some truth to what Monk says.
co-sign on Morehouse men LMWAO!!!!!!!
YES! My brother just graduated from Morehouse last year, and he’s got two of my younger first cousins following in his path. Ugh, family gatherings are going to be UNBEARABLE in about five years.
Lmbo!!! I laugh to keep from crying, hahaha!*tear*. I was SURROUNDED by these dudes back home- I grew up in my college town…and dated 2 idiots that pledged grad chapter. Smh in shame. You can find them on allthepics.com, and atlpics.com, and any other dang sites of pics of random people at random parties. Pick any pic, they’re on it…
…like 7 dudes from undergrad immediately popped into my mind…amazing
Reading this reminds me of when a friend of mine brought a DD down to size by just being herself. When she was telling me that he knew he was the cream of the crop because he had a Masters degree and then when she described their dates he sounds just like the description above, and she wasn’t overly pressed. So, I guess he was a little shocked that she wasn’t hanging from his left ball, cuz he basically called her and asked her why she wasn’t.
Champ you’ve outdone yourself!! SOOOOO hilarious!!!
I haven’t been able to comment much lately, been so busy at work
Well put, Champ! I’d like to add…
1. Diva Dudes brag about how ‘well traveled’ they are when they’ve only left the USA for Soul Beach Music Fest in Aruba/Jamaica or whatever island they have that thing.
2. When they see someone approaching DDs have to whisper in your ear that person’s name, title, how they know him, how much money they have, or what show they were recently on
3. Every dude is their ‘homeboy’ (but you know the DD ain’t friends with that many guys)
AMEN…tru tru tru…they talk more ish than most women
So glad someone, other than a perceived angry black woman, has called these b**chmade “diva dudes” out! LOL
“So glad someone, other than a perceived angry black woman, has called these b**chmade “diva dudes” out! LOL’
trust me: dudes hate these dudes just as much as women hate hoochies
@ Champ
***before I continue, i want to make it very clear that being a young, successful, black male definitely doesn’t automatically make you a DD
Glad you cleared that up…
Cause to me, the true typical “DD” are tha type cats that feels..1) Virtually NO woman meets their “standards” successfully or intellectually 2) they secretly hate females or 3) are so far on the DL you can see the tops of their heads.
“1) Virtually NO woman meets their “standards” successfully or intellectually 2) they secretly hate females”
this is true as well. if i added all the diva dude qualifications, this entry would have been 10,000 words long
This post has me dying laughing, but it’s so true. I think almost all Kappas should be on this list bc they fit the DD description to a T! I know at least like 5 that fit everything on the list! I went to undergrad with like 2, and currently am surrounded by 5 or 10 on a daily basis in law school!
maayyyne… i didn’t want to say it… but RIGHT.
this is a post for the Kappas. most def.
i will never forget a train ride i took from mich to NY and this kappa chatted me up the entire way. all in my personal space. he literally spent the whole NINE hour train ride telling me where he shopped (i made the mistake of complementing his way-overdressed-for-a-train-ride outfit) and how dapper he was and how kappas are so much greater than everyone else, and how i looked like i should be with one.
i finally got rid of him by telling him my father, brother, and boyfriend were all Alphas, after he randomly said “06 suck d*ck” while youtubing on his phone, kappa probates.
i wish i could make these things up. smh.
Long time reader, first time commenter
OMG This is tooooo funny! Thank you so much for this post!
welcome and sh*t, kiersten
DDs are running rampant in the deep south. DDs always seem to refer to women as “fee-males.” I’m a guy and I hate to hear a grown man refer to women as “fee-males.” I hate to hear it because I know when they say it they really want to call them “B’s.” Also, I went to a PWI that is known for athletic success in football and there are a lot of DDs playing college and pro sports.
I’ve noticed that the DD ipopulation making an increase down south.
I’m a guy and I’ll co-sign the men referring to women as “fee-males” as if they aren’t the same species or something. I heard a journalist talk about her going to a Nation of Islam rally back in the 90′s and the brothers kept calling her “sister”. She said after a time “sister” started to sound a lot like b****.
“DDs always seem to refer to women as “fee-males.” I’m a guy and I hate to hear a grown man refer to women as “fee-males”
yeah, i wrote about this a couple months ago. its really just a substitute for b*tch
i HATE when guys refer to women as fee-males!!! i hate it. you might as well call me a “homo sapien creature.” ugh. betch.
I hate to when anyone does that “female” thing. If you’re not a Wild Bill or Jack Corigan of some sort, then there’s no need for it, especially when they are hesitant to:
1) Refer to men as males
2) Use the word “woman”
I become disgusted when I hear that mess. Female…
diva dudes love posing in pictures at parties more than fat asians love pumas. seriously, if you’re ever at a mixer or happy hour somewhere and you’re looking for a diva dude, just find the ridiculously overdressed cat faux ice-grilling a camera while clutching a mojito.
LMAO!!!! Pure comedy!
NJ is flooded w/ diva dudes
I love this post. Loved it when I first read it, and love it even more now. As I went through the list, several men came to mind. And when I finished reading the post, I had 3 men in mind.. I knew a lot of DDs when I was in undergrad, which shouldn’t surprise anyone knowing where I attended undergrad. LOL. Fortunately, most of them grow out of it, however, several of them become even more entrenced in Diva Dudeness. It’s sad, really.
Oh these bastards are running rampant so this piece of brilliance is as relevant as ever… if even one woman’s time is spared, this repost will not be in vain.
“Oh these bastards are running rampant”
**cue uncontrollable laughter….shuts office door**
I think one of the main things you left out is that these cats ALWAYS..ALWAYS..feel that they are just a step above you. I once had this DD tell me his Iphone was better than his because he had an otter box…and I had what he called a “regular case”. I’m like c’mon son you rockin the original Iphone. This got me thinking (like just now) While they all appear to be successful and “fly” on the outside, they as bout as washed up as Bret Farve, and Kurt Warner after playing the Saints (WHO DAT)
Dr. Lipshitz Says….
“I once had this DD tell me his Iphone was better than his because he had an otter box…and I had what he called a “regular case”. I’m like c’mon son you rockin the original Iphone”
wow. this takes douchebaggery to a whole new level
Diva dudes are everywhere nowadays. I just had a date with a diva dude. He didn’t want to talk on the phone or get to know me, he just wanted to “meet up”….talked mostly about himself and how great (aka rare he is and lucky i should feel) and wrapped up the “meet up” by wanting to go to the club…..SO he can watch me “whine” to reggae.
(yeah he actually said that)
WHACK
I think many black men got cocky. Now beige is out and dark is in (hell even white girls are fantasizing). With all the negative stereotypes, sucessful black men are not only getting arrogant, they’re getting unbelievably picky.
It’s really sad
Here’s my diva dude detector:
* collar shirt w/ 3/4 rolled up sleeves
* wears shades indoors
* ring on pinky finger
* drives a BMW
* usually likes vests
* kappas, qdogs, etc
* drinks nouveau, ciroq or any alchohol named in hip hop songs
* skinny jeans
* cashes his entire paycheck to keep wrapped up in a rubberband in his pocket
Oh and I forgot….he usually shoots sideways peace signs in pictures.
“Oh and I forgot….he usually shoots sideways peace signs in pictures.”
Awwww. Come on…Even cats in jail do this in pics lol. Would it be better if I had my middle finger up? j/k
(only defensive cause you described my FB pic)
….and its a club pic in DC. smh *taking pic down asap*
LMBO,,,the fact that you are even a part of this blog means you are not a diva dude…continue as you were
@ SmartFoxGirl,
*iDied* at your diva dude detector list, currently making portable version of this check list to take out and about with me in DC..
Always…can also be referred to as a “douche bag” detector, 2520′s taught me this
You are actually right. A diva dude is pretty much a black douche bag.
* kappas, qdogs, etc
As a Bruh, I cannot co-sign on this at all…titles like “nasty, freaky, doggish, etc.”…yeah, ok… but “Diva dude”? Come on, darlin…
Although I do somewhat agree with this…
“With all the negative stereotypes, sucessful black men are not only getting arrogant, they’re getting unbelievably picky.”
A lot of dudes have started feeling themselves just a lil’ too much…trying to be sexier than the womenfolks…I guess everybody wants to be a diamond in a room full of coals…
Okay, I won’t use the word all….but most frat brothas. Sorry, from female experience, i stand behind my statement.
Yeah, i typically am attracted to black men and I notice a level of increased confidence…which I support knowing where we came from…but damn.
5. they’re not chivalrous and proud of it
hmph. reminds me of some folks…
Yeah, #5 definitely took me back. smh….
Me too… It’s nice to know there are men who don’t #cosign this foolishness.
Guuuurrrrl!!!! THIS!^^ Humph – where were the VSB’s when the SBM’s were rantin’ and ravin’ bout Eff Chivalry, Kill Chivalry, Drag Chivalry behind a truck, Make Chivalry wear House of Dereon, etc.?
That’s ok, though – I think the ladies helped kill that one.
There were a few VSB’s in there holding it down for us.
does said folks have their own blog? *dead* #shots
*DIES ON ARRIVAL*
You hit this one out the park. And as for #9…. as a sorority member I can vouch for that one. Hahahahahahaha! This is why I have SWORN OFF GREEK MEN! (Though I’m Greek too…shame) These dudes are narcissistic psychopaths and they think every woman in the world owes them something because they can twirl a cane or play patty cake with their hands. I know punk-foolery when I see it…. you wasn’t even hot before you got your letters…. I’m not stuntin’ these overly educated idiots.
LMAO…You know I have met an equal amount of greek and non-greek DDs, probably because I now live in a place where there’s a high population of men who didn’t attend college. Although being greek more times than not lends itself to DD-dom, I have a warm place in my
pantiesheart for certain men who are greeks. Generally if you had basic social skills and common sense and were not an attention whore before you pledged and stayed that way, you might getassa passPsychopaths? That is hilarious. I can understand how you would feel that way about Greek men. I have seen guys completely change, where undergrad or grad, when they get letters. Some people were a-holes before and either they stay the same a-hole or their a-hole factor goes up a notch afterward. Probably because of my mom I grew up around Greeks as a kid and I always saw the service side of it, so when I became Greek (did it grad, oddly enough), I had no reason to change be an a-hole towards people. I guess I was trying to break that stereotype. Boy, I swear, not a day goes by where something does show me that you women have it hard out there. God bless ya.
welcome and sh*t, SP08
*TIPS HAT* Thank ya kindly
Great observation Champ and its a very true phenom, your breakdown anyway, smh, just another “type” to discern and avoid EARLY.
Is that one of the Champs party pictures? He might be a Diva Dude?!?
LOL
Is it just me or does jay-z seem like the king of DD’s?
“Used to tell they friends I was ugly and wouldn’t touch me/
Then I showed up in that dubbed out buggy/
And then they got fussy and they don’t remember that/
And I don’t remember you..”
Don’t see that at all, that verse is more like mf’ers catching vapors as opposed to Jay being a DD, LOL, now Sean Combs on the other hand ALL DAY and may I add a good % of these DD’s are also DL..
Wu Young I concur with your comments and quite a few others, esp having to be “on” ALL the time,
Yea you right. Puffy wears the crown for DD’s…and to think he started the term ‘B!t#ha$$ness’. Ironic. Jay still the the prince tho. The pic above might as well be the Roc Boys video…
Oyea. Any dude who gets pedi’s and has spa days might be a DD. Matter fact that’s just gay
“Is it just me or does jay-z seem like the king of DD’s?
“Used to tell they friends I was ugly and wouldn’t touch me/
Then I showed up in that dubbed out buggy/
And then they got fussy and they don’t remember that/
And I don’t remember you.”
hmmm. don’t say that too loud
hell yeah he’s a diva dude and so is kanye west!!!
Jay-Z is on the list but top of the brass might have to go to Fabolous just for calling himself Fabolous…
bleecchh, I just threw up in my mouth a little at that picture.
To add to this list:
DDs also aggregate their expendable weekly earnings to get an outrageously priced table at a lounge or club frequented by beautiful women; make sure it’s in a very conspicuous location for all passersby; wear designer sunglasses when the only light available is dimmer than a candle; keep the ‘velvet rope’ up; and crowd about 9 other DDs (that split the table costs) while they stand there, mojito in one hand, other hand in pocket nodding to the music. DDSausagefest 2010.
‘DDs also aggregate their expendable weekly earnings to get an outrageously priced table at a lounge or club frequented by beautiful women; make sure it’s in a very conspicuous location for all passersby; wear designer sunglasses when the only light available is dimmer than a candle; keep the ‘velvet rope’ up; and crowd about 9 other DDs (that split the table costs) while they stand there, mojito in one hand”
so basically, they’re exactly like the basketball wives
I would like to take this opportunity to share an anecdote/example of Diva Dudes in Boston.
Two years ago, this young fella approached me at a party, while he was posing for all the pics[red flag], asked for my number said we can “chill” sometime [red flag]. I checked him out and being a sucker for the ripped, metrosexual type of dudes, of course I stupidly said yes.
So he calls me, and asks if I want to go to the movies with him, I said yes. I found out in the car which movie we’re seeing…. A MUSICAL[red flag]… and lawd knows I hate musicals but because of his style and heavenly smelling cologne, I let it slide.
We get to the movies, he walks in front of me while on the phone with one of his DD boys [red flag], gets his ticket turns around and asks me “You not gonna get ur ticket” I was livid and cremated right then and there. I was more so pissed that I forgot to carry loose change to take the bus and train back home. So here I am stuck watching a musical movie with a DD who’s still wearing his sunglasses in the movie theaters. In addition this is phenomenon, this mothaflowering Diva Dude joker, tries to kiss me after the movies and I laughed so hard I literally rolled on the floor. He looked at me said “what? what’s so funny?” I said nothing and left it like that.
Reason for sharing this. Well for 2 years my girlfriends and I never knew the appropriate term to call these particular dudes. So thank u Champ for enhancing my vocabulary
Diva Dude: they’re not chivalrous and proud of it
So here I am stuck watching a musical movie with a DD who’s still wearing his sunglasses in the movie theaters.
this is grounds for murder
You gotta be kidding me. Like, are you serious? Really? My fists are balled up so hard for you right now. I can only imagine how angry you were. He would have had my fist all in his glasses at that theater. And the a&b charges woulda been worth it.
This post right here.,..is in my top 5 on VSB.
Loves it, for so many personal reasons that I don’t have time to go into. But I can say, this Diva Dude sh*t is one of the reasons that I am in my 30′s I have only dated a handful of guys that are my equal in terms of education and profession.
So I know Derrick, the guy in the middle, and he is NOT a diva dude. I go to school with him; we’re in the same circles, and I have known him for the past 3 years, and I can honestly say, he’s a grown ass man who handles his business AND respects women. I understand where you are coming from as far as this diva dude definition, and I understand that you did not directly say he is a diva dude. But having his picture up there is not the business. Derrick is a good guy, well mannered, pledged a undergraduate fraternity, and is centered. I’m usually down with what you say, but this one hits home. Derrick does NOT fall into this category. Get it together …CHAMP.
Whit
anyone else reminded of that comedy sketch (DL Hugley I think) where he’s talking to a girl who says, I’m not a ho! and he says, but you’re wearing a ho’s uniform….
I don’t know Derrick but from your description I’ll take his number. You can post it here and I promise not to share it with anyone else.
“But having his picture up there is not the business”
i had something snarky to say, but you’re right. putting a bunch of “civilians” out there like that was unnecessary, so i took it down.
Why shouldn’t ugly ducklings who’ve recently become beautiful swans take advantage of that to score the panties? In fact, I have no problem at all with the “diva dude”. Based on all the characteristics you’ve described, there doesn’t seem to be anything sneaky about them. It is pretty easy to spot them. So just like the girl who goes home with the player, people know what they are getting into.
Well said Kamakula. When I see these dudes at the clubs they seem to be having a gang of fun snapping photos with the large group of women (who by the way drove to the club in their luxury cars packed with their besties in their expensive-looking clothes) who seem to enjoy their attention in the V.I.P. room.
You know what? I aint at ‘em but I aint mad at ‘em.
Corny? Perhaps, but easy to spot and avoidable if that is really not your type and like I said these dudes stay with women who like their swag.
And ToneCapone I am with you on the Jay-Z thing….the DivaDude poster child (Nas called him out well) rocking lizards and cro-co-diles. But hey, he is with Beyonce a-a-a-diva, right?
LLS, there is truly a distinction between being a FLY THOROUGH ass dude, refined even, and putting the b’s in bama ass bitch like dudes…. LOL folk need to discern the differences honey!
….they don’t make enough of the former. I tells ya, far too many of the latter.
I dont know sister….but I respect your opinion.
“Why shouldn’t ugly ducklings who’ve recently become beautiful swans take advantage of that to score the panties?”
there’s nothing wrong with that, but the mindset i described is based more in misogyny.
I guess I never really saw it that way. I always felt it was more from a feeling of entitlement – that they were owed it now that they’ve removed the one obstacle that they felt was getting them shut down in the past.
Of course, being an unattractive dude myself, perhaps I know not what I speak.
Man…this post is so damn true. DD have definitely tainted the dating pool. Nothing is worse than dating a DD. Thankfully, I can spot them a mile away and I am not attracted to them at all. Something about a dude that looks and acts more fierce than me. I ain’t having it.
Wow, Champ. You definitely been going in this week. This is a funny topic because all of us knows someone like this. Based on your list and the things that everyone has posted, it makes me worried that I may have diva dude tendencies. Let’s see if I do.
-I live in the 4th largest city in the US, only because it was the best place I could find a job. I grew in Dallas, so big city living is what I am used to.
-I pledged a grad chapter. Funny thing is that when I didn’t do it as an undergrad, I was about to cash it in and not worry about after I graduated. I moved to Mobile, AL, where every black person with clout was Greek and so I decided to pursue it again. Worked out well, got really involved in the community, mentored kids, volunteered at elementary schools, which was the main reason why I wanted to be in a frat anyway. I don’t rock a lot a paraphernalia and the stuff I do have is all gifts. I am not one of those people that have to let me know what frat I am in. People usually assume just by looking at me and they are usually right but unless they ask, I probably won’t say anything.
- I shop at Express. I wear nothing but polo shirts and khakis to work everyday because I work in sales. I like the fit of their polo shirts because I am comfortable enough in my body not to wear oversized clothes like I did when I was in college. I’m 6’2″, 230 and I put in work in the gym so why hide with oversized clothes. I don’t wear the weird shirts they sell there, so I mainly buy polos and socks. Outside of work, I wear t-shirts, jeans and Chucks. I’m a real laid back guy. Plus my little sister likes shopping at Banana Republic for me for some odd reason.
-I use Sporting Waves on my hair, but I don’t go to Sam’s and Costco to buy it, just my local Asian owned black beauty supply. I like my hair wavy, but not S-Curl, blow out kit kind of wavy. That’s just sad.
Besides those things, I don’t think I’m a diva dude. I believe in chivalry. I went out to eat with a woman one time and when I pulled out a chair for her, she asked me did I want that seat. I said no, I was just pulling out the chair for you. She was quite embarrassed. Since I wear Malcolm X black frame glasses, you won’t catch me in sunglasses. I love all black women and they all deserve to be happy, no matter how much education, money and prestige they have. They should be loved who they are, not based on what they have.
Let’s see, what else. Oh yeah, diva dudes sound very weak and very suspect. There is nothing wrong with dressing nice and being well groomed as a black man. The odds are always against us so we have to put our best foot forward more than most, but outside of being in a professional setting, overdoing it can be pretty annoying. Check out the website http://www.indmix.com. It is a site to all of the happenings in Houston. The diva dudes will trip you out.
Isn’t the guy on the right Gerald McCoy, the defensive tackle from Oklahoma that got drafted by Tampa Bay?
So you are a good guy disguised as a DD!! See above post Re: Derrick, LOL….
Well DD-ness is dress PLUS behavior, so if you have only the dress you can’t legally be found to be a DD. Any demonstration of self-awareness will get you kicked out of the club. I’m pretty sure we all think well-grommed and polite black men are just fine. Overstyled, narcissistic douche canoes are not.
Well, that makes me feel better. No matter where I go in life, there are times I still see myself as the skinny kid that read comic books and baked cookies for girls. Keeps me humble. I have come a long way in life and I can’t act brand new and forget that.
@ComicBookGuy
Are you real? Be honest…are you some fat, smell 2520 who’s saying all the right things? I need to know these things,ol
Come on, now. You should know me well enough from this site. I’m black, I’m 6’2″ and I am smelly. (Okay, only after the gym) I’m real, real in the sense of being me. Funny thing is, if you knew me 5 or 10 years ago, I’m the same guy. Same hobbies, same geekiness, same nice guy, just more confident and in shape. It’s hard enough being me in this world. Being someone else would be a hell of a lot harder.
I mean NOT smelly. lol
LMAO @ smelly
I knew what you meant buddy
“I’m 6?2?, 230 and I put in work in the gym”- *stopped dead in my tracks*
Say what? This isht ain’t real… He’s definitely a unicorn/leprechaun/mythical creature- lol
@Yeah…So!?!,
Say what? This isht ain’t real… He’s definitely a unicorn/leprechaun/mythical creature- lol
Now that is just funny. Mythical creature is a new one for me.
@ YeahSo!?!
THANKYOU!!!
ComicBookGuy doesn’t understand his e-appeal,lol
@ComicBookGuy
I kid, I kid. But hey…like the lotto…you never know :p
Oh, and I fully expect you to FedEx me some cookies for my birthday next week. Chocolate chips w/ walnuts…please, and thank you
Oh, that’s right. You’re a Taurus like me. I hit the 28 a week ago. I’ll make those just for you. I can’t do walnuts in my cookies.
@ComicBookGuy
Awww man! I missed your birthday?!!
Happy Belated!
*sings happy birthday Mr. ComicBookGuy a la Marilyn Monroe*
I also think comicbookguy and quite a few of you others are fictional beings, so I’m gonna have to invite you over so I can see for myself. My radiator might be broken so I might be in my drawers when you get here. And bring the cookies LaBakir asked for, she don’t love you like I do.
@RocktheCatbox
LMAO! I can’t! Is this cock blockery I’m seeing?
Ain’t no fun if the homies can’t have none! Although on second thoughts…CBG seems like a keeper,lol
@RocktheCatbox,
You ladies have made my day. Y’all are hilarious.
You better watch out. I be up in the D all the time for work so if I see a pretty brown skin woman with her hood up on the side of the road, I might be in trouble.
@LaBakir,
You know I got you, buddy. I was bumping the Superfly soundtrack in your honor earlier.
You ladies have made my day. Y’all are hilarious.
@ ComicBookGuy
Awwww…I feels special
You can’t swing by the D w/o coming to NJ/NY. It’s only right. Yes, I know they’re no where near each other…but that’s besides the point. On a random note, I went to the D once for a T.I. concert….quite a depressing city. That was the time I think a madame tried to recruit me *side eye*
@LaBakir,
You know what is funny? My boss just gave me the east coast as sales territory so I will trotting up and down the coast this summer, NJ included. lol
Yeah, I’ve been doing in the D the past two years and it has been hard to drive around certain parts because it can get a bit depressing, especially when you know how much powerful that city was with the auto industry.
On another note, with all of the e-compliments I have been getting, I realized that I have come a long way. I stopped by the comic book store at lunch and I swear it felt good to be the only guy in there that wasn’t overweight and didn’t look like he still lived in his mother’s basement.
LOL! Are you serious? That’s what’s up. I’ll keep my eye out for a guy w/ mythological Last Dragon glow
Ha, @ your comic book store experience. I haven’t been in one in years. There was this store that sold comic books and basketball cards…I used to collect b-ball cards in my younger days. Damn…now that I think about it…I had a damn album and er’thing
6’2″ 230? and the e-panties from random women shall start being thrown in five… four… three…lol.
THIS.
“Oh yeah, diva dudes sound very weak and very suspect. There is nothing wrong with dressing nice and being well groomed as a black man. The odds are always against us so we have to put our best foot forward more than most”
YES.
i agree. he’s a unicorn ladies. i only know of like four of them, period.
@ComicBookGuy
btw… i now have the image of that chick’s buff husband with the glasses in the movie Hav Plenty as your e-image now. google says his name is Reginald James. lol
@ Muze
LMAO…you’s a fool! I just googled him! But I likes….:)
@LaBakir
LOL. for reals though.
thanks for reading the blog btw.
glad you enjoyed.
“Bug master, but master…”
I LOVE that movie!!!
No prob! You’re an excellent writer! Did you post again today?
Okay, maybe I shouldn’t have given my stats out like that, especially if I am going to compared to a unicorn. Lol You are too funny.
As far as being imagined as Reginald James, that is far beyond flattering for me. I am definitely trying to get on that level. For a guy that was 185 five years ago when I got out of college, people almost don’t recognize me at 230.
Yuuup..that’s fine tho. CBG just needs to let us know when he’s coming to the D so we can do a more thorough investigation of your height-weight-
shoe sizeratio.*dead*
My sentiments exactly!
@RocktheCatbox,
You are really killing me today. A guy isn’t used to this kind of e-sentiment. This is all new to me.
Oh, by the way. Mid June and size 14. Kinda hard to buy comfortable shoes sometimes.
Ok, I’m gonna stop now.
Ah, so that explains it. I’m just 6’1 and less than 230lbs. I was wondering why I never get any play.
dude you’re doing a lot of explaining but since you gave so much ammunition, i have a couple of questions.
” I moved to Mobile, AL, where every black person with clout was Greek and so I decided to pursue it again.”
- so basically you pursued being greek again because you were influenced by people of power?
” Worked out well, got really involved in the community, mentored kids, volunteered at elementary schools, which was the main reason why I wanted to be in a frat anyway.”
- couldn’t you have joined big brothers/big sisters, 100 black men and NAACP and gained the same experiences?
personally i don’t think that you should have to explain your reasons for wanting to be/pursuing greek. but if you feel like you want to, then please answer the questions i posed.
he explained so he wouldn’t be considered a DD, but putting out his stats got the ladies swooning so I think this was a strategic tactic. “im not one of those guys…” well played, Mr. “i’m not REALLY a DD”.
Uh oh, I think she’s on to me. lol
You got a cool blog. Very good taste in music. In My Mind was a pretty good album. I’ve been a Pharrell and Chad fan since they did the production to “Use Your Heart” by SWV, one of my favorite songs.
preciate you checking it out. and yes, I’m on to you
It’s all good, homie. When I was college, the fraternity I was wanted to be a part had the same goals and standards that I stood by where I was in it or not. When I got out of college, I felt that despite it not happening as an undergrad, if it was mean to be, the opportunity would present inself, and I would pursue it. When it did, and I met the kind of men in that chapter, I felt comfortable with them and what they were doing in the city. I didn’t know a soul when I moved out there plus I worked around nothing but 2520s so it was a chance for me to get involved in the black community. The fraternity itself was having a great impact than other service organizations in the city, especially at the ground level. With that impact, as well as the camaraderie that I saw with them, I felt like it was meant to be for me after all. It was never about prestige, or getting women, or having a sense of entitlement. It was always about helping others, being an example, and the black male camaraderie that can’t be duplicated anywhere else. Having mentors that were Greek growing help is also a part of that, too, giving back the same way others gave to you.
Lol…you are definitely the exception to the rule here in Houston, most *emphasis on most* guys out here are DD’s or wanna-be dudes, the whole Idea down here is “how can I show that I can spend more than you, although I am riding in a car with a repo-man target on its back because I spent my car note money on the 4 bottles I bought at *insert club name* that my homeboy *insert promoter name that they barely even know* is throwing” Houston is so wanna be Hollywood it is ridiculous.
I personally don’t mind a well dressed, pretty boy, that knows how to act like a man, the truth is I have learned that a man will only get away with the stuff you as a woman let him get away with, as soon any dude I talk to start to portray DD attitudes his phone calls go into the NO-answer label on my phone.
But the DD’s here in Houston are always lurking, and some of the females down here can be so thirsty sometimes that these dudes keep behaving that way cause they can get away with it.
Love this post! I have several friends who qualify as DDs based on your list (once you get past the quirks they are actually good people). I have told them many times that they need to get it together so as not to end up as the old guy at the club.
I cosign with whoever said that I could have used this list in the past, b/c I have dated Mr. Back-Then-THey-Didn’t-Want-Me (a couple of times, shame on me) and Mr. Delusional a.k.a. I’m-Not-An-Asshole-I-Just-Tell-The-Truth. Thanks to you, I’m forewarned and forearmed.
Okay, had no idea that the picture changed up on me.
Just got a bunch of uncomfortable dating flashbacks, thanks A LOT! here’s a list of actual DD wonders:
-wore excessive turquoise jewlery (rings, bracelets), distressed jeans and gators. before the date, called to find out what I was wearing on the date so we could match color schemes.
-wore driving gloves whenever he drove his acura.
-was a name dropper who hobobbed with “famous” people, like a city councilman, an event planner and a party promoter.
-a label whore, asked who made my purse. invited me to a show where he “modeled” a floor-length mink AND A BLUE TOOTH.
-has photoshopped glamor shot of himself on business cards that he actually gives to people.
-WORE BLUE TOOTH. ALL THE TIME, paired with shades at night.
-brags about and displays latest iPhone/BB/bionic hand
-assumed he was smarter/better traveled, and then got bitchy and irritated when he realized he wasn’t
-had ivy league pretensions (did a semeter at vanderbilt, then transferred to a community college)
-attends keynote speech at a conference. At the Q&A portion introduces his question with “as a Morehouse man and a Kappa, who is currently a medical student, I’d like to know….”
-shares “philosophy” on womens’ behavior, unsolicited
-proceeds to bait you into an argument about how all females act and think
-makes you smell his cologne, actually says “don’t I smell good?” spends rest of the date fishing for compliments.
-brags about income, yet wants first date to be in a sports bar that serves fries in a basket.
-actually said “most women are just grateful to date me and say they don’t deserve me”; got offended when I lol’d.
-critical of womens’ appearances (she’s fat, look at her shoes, that dress doesn’t fit right) which gets them the closet-case side eye
-awful in bed and blames you [yes this nigga did]
I could go on but I’m actually ashamed at having even gone on a first date with some of these a*holes so I’mma stop here.
Once again, my dear, you have ya boy in stitches. All that stuff is hilarious. Can’t believe there is actually a dude walking around that fits those descriptions.
I’m visual, so these image are funny as all hell…I just imagined some random VSS commenting and you had to respond:
RtCB: “Girl, don’t you know this n#gga lasted all of 2 lil ‘measly mins…THEN the mf had the nerve to blame ME?”
VSS: “Girl, no he didn’t…”
RtCB: “Yes this n#gga did”
You should have your own radio show or sumthin’…this stuff is hilarious.
@RocktheCatbox
So you dated this dude?
http://drewjustice.files.wordpress.com/2009/05/levarburton.jpg
I’m curious. What attracted you to him?
Um…I always liked Reading Rainbow??
I dont know, lol. these dues were on me like white on rice in my 20s and I just didn’t turn down dates very often unless the dude had bad body odor or is insulting. They approached me and were friendly so I thought…meh. Why not. Plus when you are under 18K a year in grad school you just don’t turn down the promise of free food.
Also, I know DDs like to spring dutch on you so I always lied and said I didn’t bring cash or credit cards when the check comes. They couldnt do NATTING and I knew by the end of the date there wasn’t gonna be another one anyway. LOL. These days I’m too tired to just accept dates for the hell of it, I want a guarantee of some substance or else I’m not leaving the house.
@RocktheCatbox
“I dont know, lol. these dues were on me like white on rice in my 20s and I just didn’t turn down dates very often unless the dude had bad body odor or is insulting. They approached me and were friendly so I thought…meh. ”
So DD’s have a penchant for you? And if you didn’t turn down dates often i wonder if you have met the opposite of diva dudes? I call them “monte carlo ninjas”.
Yes, yes I have. I don’t know what it is, but DDs–and of course monte carlo ninjas [you know I live in Michigan!!] still have a thing for me. I’m proud to say I don’t resemble the cast of Basketball wives. I like fashion as much as the next girl but I’m not in stilettos to go to Target. I suspect I have “you’re not from round here” appeal and I think for most men that’s all it takes. everyone socializes around their high school/neighborhood so I always seem new when I been living here 10 years. I’m not saying every lady needs to have one, but I get noticed far more wearing out, natural hair than when it’s straight, so DDs are drawn to me the way one is drawn to a zoo animal. Which is primarily a pain. (Is a monte carlo ninja an old player or one of those dudes who swag surf?)
@ rockthecatbox
“attends keynote speech at a conference. At the Q&A portion introduces his question with “as a Morehouse man and a Kappa, who is currently a medical student, I’d like to know….”
bows head in shame… i was a victim of one such a Diva dude once ..we weren’t even at a conference… it was a simple lunch run in, yet he introduced his question to the waitress … with the said “as a morehouse man ,insert greek org, MD/PhD candidate
Sir!!! Just ask her for the extra napkins.!!!…
oh my gaaaaaaaaaaawsh! this ish was hilarious and sad and wonderful and depressing all at the same time. that dude is wack. yet i thank him for the laughter i have recieved on this spring day. driving gloves with an acura? yass!
Ok, I’m dieing lauging especially at the first two. I have never in all my life heard of a man that will call you so we can match on a date.
Also, driving gloves? That sounds like some rich white woman ish.
**dying laughing
“awful in bed and blames you [yes this nigga did]”
I think this warrants a *throat punch*.
T-Lee, what up? Been missing ya throat punches.
Hey CBGuy….
*waves*
Saw your post above about indmix. I know them kats, real cool dudes.
The site was definitely a great example of showing the DD’s in the H…lol
The site was definitely a great example of showing the DD’s in the H…lol
Boy, is it. These ninjas out here refuse to be told that they are not fly. Nobody cares about your baby hair, ninja. Edge that sh!t up.
Sometimes you end up on the pics in spite yourself (I know Divas and Diva Dudes…Lol)…
But yeah indmix is rife with diva dudes…
-wore driving gloves whenever he drove his acura.
I actually met another one of my friend’s frat who wore driving gloves. He also had on a matching houndstooth cap. No one from Walterboro,South Carolina should ever be allowed to dress this way. I swear if he would have been eating an ice cream cone I would’ve knocked it into the dirt.
“He also had on a matching houndstooth cap. No one from Walterboro,South Carolina should ever be allowed to dress this way.
*cackling loudly*
This kat sounds sooooo extra!
Way extra! I wanted to put him in a triangle choke.Ol I’m goin’ to a fox hunt lookin’ a** boy. I really don’t like these dudes.
“Ol I’m goin’ to a fox hunt lookin’ a** boy”
You’re trying to kill me today…please stop!!! LMAO
I’m dying reading this. Did all this happen with the SAME dude or a combination of dudes?
Oh no, LOL these are nine different men over the span of 11 years…but if I actually did date one dude that had all these effed up characteristics, I would deserve to be a Steve Harvey case study.
awful in bed and blames you [yes this nigga did]
um, after all of that godawfulness that you described above, i hope you found out about his lame bedroom skills via heresay, ain’t no way a lame DD like that would get some play…
All I can say in my defense is that I was young!! lol the list wasn’t all one dude, so in my defense their DD-ness was not completely clear to me until a single defining moment (sex, the fashion show, the dating wardrobe, a conversation about relationships, their enthusiasm for an episode of for the love of ray jay, etc)
Is this all really that bad. . . cuz I seriously was planning on getting a set of driving gloves myself. . .
LOL Unless you plan to star on tokyo drift or driving ms. daisy…the gloves are a touch douchey, but I promise not to clown you to your face.
ROTFL @ fox hunt–you see?!!!
Boy don’t I know alot of these! I like number 4! LOL But really…I wish some decent dudes would come to Little Rock, Arkansas because when I say the pickings are slim…Boy. SMH BTW Don’t forget the ones that will see you out after you haven’t seen each other in a while and talk about wanting to hook up only to see if you still will…then when you try he’s not interested…Lames…
So, you just took my entire dating history and posted it on the internet for everyone to see *hangs head.* You are so on the money with all of these descriptions and the fact that it’s coming from a male perspective just amplifies the points that women have been making for years. Clap, clap, BRAVO!
That was hilarious… and eye-opening. I think I’ve met one or two of these. Definitely will be heading in the other damn direction, immediately.
Hey Mal!!!
I went to school and grew up around these dudes (thanks mom & dad). These cats stay on some b**chninja ish. I really can’t stand these cats. I don’t want to get too personal but my beef with them is related to my beef with the Black middle class. Just a few wack things that they do.
1) Judge other dudes based on their appearance.
DD: Humble I thought you were a thug or tough guy
Me: Why
DD: Because you always wear timbs or sneakers and rock your fitteds low. You got waves but you don’t cut you hair to show them.
2) Diva Dudes hate on other guys that attract or pull women they can’t get.
Why are you f’in wih Humble? That dude shaves and gets a haircut every 2 weeks. He’s a nerd. He’s broke. He’s a thug. Why do you want his black @ss? True story that happened a few times to me.
3) They think they’re more intellectual than they actually are and think other dudes need to get on their level.
These dudes kill me trying to school me. Like I stated above they judge you off of how they see you without knowing you. I’ve had these dudes try to kick knowledge to me sounding like complete @sses. When it comes out that I have a degree and I read they are f’ed up. If you don’t dress or look like them they assume you’re part of the 92.8% of undateable Black men.
4) They try to present a certain image.
They keep a fresh haircut and over dress. They always act like they are big businessmen making huge deals an dealing with big name people.
5) Women heavily into church tend to gravitate towards them.
6) They are attracted to racially ambiguous women and Hi-lite h*es.
I hate weak @$$ ninjas like that, especially when they hate on you. Step ya game up and quit hating. I’ve had a some pretty night straight hate on me because I had a Spider-man shirt on and I was talking to some cute girls, straight trying clown on low. Hey, man, this is me. This is what I feel comfortable in wearing and because they not talking to your pretty @$$, back up. Sorry, flashback.
@205 ComicBookGuy
Let it out man, let it out!
I had to, man. Been dealing with ninjas like that since I was a kid. I don’t get it a lot, so let me get mine when I get it. Don’t hate. It’s not a good look.
@ComicBookGuy
“I had to, man. Been dealing with ninjas like that since I was a kid. I don’t get it a lot, so let me get mine when I get it. Don’t hate. It’s not a good look”
Cosign. I’ve had to deal with those cats back in the day too. What said came from the heart. I really don’t like these guys. And Detroit is full of them. They usually come from the Northwest side, Northeast side, Southfield, Oak Park, Farmington Hills, Lathrup Village, Sherwood Forest, Palmer Woods, Rosedale, etc. Did I mention that I don’t like these guys?
@Humble_One,
Dude, you and I must be long lost brothers or something. One time I was in the D and I stayed at a Holiday Inn in Farmington Hills. I was checking into a hotel and the lady at the desk was feeling ya boy. I was making nothing of it but she was pretty so I struck up a conversation with her. Some pretty ass ninja with an S-curl wave kit straight threw salt in the game by explaining everything about the hotel to me. Hey, man, I’m talking to a pretty lady. Hold up. He got a straight side-eye from me. What messed me up even more is that when I left my room to grab a bite to eat, she was already off of work so I couldn’t talk to her again. Hating ass ninja. I be all up in Berkley, Sterling Heights, Southfield, Sherwood Forest when I am up there for business. I know what you are talking about.
By the way, I’ll be back in the D again in June. Where can a ninja get a good bite to eat. I ain’t afraid to go to the hood for it either.
@ComicBookGuy
“By the way, I’ll be back in the D again in June. Where can a ninja get a good bite to eat. I ain’t afraid to go to the hood for it either.”
What kind of food are you looking for?
@Humble_One,
Soul food, good home cooking. A good mom and pop restaurant. Detroit is probably one of the bigger cities I travel to so it is kinda hard to find a good spot that isn’t a chain restaurant. Red Lobster and Outback is pretty much the same no matter where you go.
lmao@ no.6
Sorry to break it to ya, but that all seems to be a part of the black middle class pandemic, regardless of gender.
I’m sorry you have those experiences, though.
this list is hilarious. i would like to hear more insight on dudes that “pledged” grad chapters. lol
Diva Dudes are rampant in Chicago – here, there’s at least 2 generations of them, with the older ones dressing and sounding exactly like Charlie Wilson.
Oh no!!!!! Not 2 generations of this ish…lol
with the older ones dressing and sounding exactly like Charlie Wilson
LMFAO My Mama need to move to Chi and holla at some playas! She loves Charlie Wilson!
LOL!
this had me Lol!! i know a few.. but then again doesn’t everyone..
@RocktheCatbox, you had it on point!!
1. loves to name drop.. (yet, i’m not impressed by said person you calim to know..
ex: oh, you wanna meet “Iconz”
me: (looks up from book) “oh, them people that sing that ONE song?
ex: “yeah, we go way back, they’re outside..”
me: “i’m straight.. and lock the door behind you..”
he STILL runs around with “celebrities”.. over 30, and you’re pretending.. getting shout outs from Trick Daddy on your website, is NOT what’s hot on my block!
2. takes longer to get ready than i do..
i once told someone “only one of us can have long hair.. that ish knocks the planet off its axis..” what i look like, you STILL washing your hair!! our reservations are for 1 hour from now.. and we might be runnin late..
i know a certain person that claims they want an intellectual woman (he’s 33!) yet will only date 23-26 year olds so that he can floss like he’s the smartest one in the room.. “Did you know that the new prime minister in Jamaica is such and such..?”
me: “did you know that i don’t care..?”
him: “why are you so hard on me?”
(he makes me laugh actually..
gratefully, i’m QUICK to recognize such tomfoolery.. and am quick to let you know that i know what the hell you’re doing.. and it’s not cute..
insecure reggins are SO unattractive..
“i know a certain person that claims they want an intellectual woman (he’s 33!) yet will only date 23-26 year olds so that he can floss like he’s the smartest one in the room..”
Dude must not be dating a lot of smart women period regardless of age.
Can someone please tell me the issue with pledging a grad chapter? What exactky does it say about the person? Someone please enlighten me.
“Can someone please tell me the issue with pledging a grad chapter? What exactky does it say about the person?”
lol, nothing at all. i kid the kappas.
did you pledge grad chapter?
This post is spot on. It seems to me the higher the education level, the more DD attributes they develop.
# 2. they live in college towns or cities with metropolitan areas over 500,000 people… Living in Boston, I can say this is definitely true. There are so many colleges here but still a very small part of the population is black, male, and educated. If I meet one more Joke at a party that opens with the lines “I go to Harvard…” I am going to start smacking people. They say it like I am supposed to drop my panties and be impressed. Please, away with you!
3. they’ve been the proverbial ugly duckling until very recently
And usually still are. Not saying that there are no good looking smart men out there, but lets be real. A lot of these DD’s aint even that cute. Thats why they’re falling back on their educational attributes so early in the game. Degree pushin’ cuz they otherwise suck at life, and they know they face is a 2.
10. they don’t actually date…Of course they dont. they rely on the fact that they went to XYZ college, or are doing XYZ with their lives to keep getting panties from the next chick, and then the next, and the next. There are so many shallow women out there who fall for the game. On that tip I can really only blame DD’s AND the stupid women who keep f*cking them.
My issue is that most of these things apply to a lot of guys. Well, let’s be real. Most of them apply to me.
1. I’m 25, straight, single, with degrees, and umm. . well even $1 counts as income right?
2. I live in Pittsburgh. Also lived in Tallahassee, Rochester and DC.
3. Still the proverbial duckling.
4. Friends. . . ah. Hmm. My friend circle is small. I’m acquaintances with many guys in similar situations though.
5. I’m nice when I want to be. If you want to hit me over the head with what women shouldn’t have to do anymore for a man, I’ll gladly respond in kind.
6. Scapegoat. . .hmm, how about this “All chicks who turned me down weren’t worth it anyway!” Yeah, I rock the sour grapes like nobody’s business.
7. I’m delusional. There is a very clear mismatch between my dreams and my current life situation. You’d really have to be crazy to live my life.
8. I tend to keep the f*cking pictures to a minimum.
9. I’ve still got time for this.
10. Yeah, my relationships have tended to bypass the dating stage really fast, or I’m a 3 and out. So I guess compared to others, I haven’t really dated that much in my life.
If somebody is NOT a diva dude, it’s you Mr. Kamakula… so you need to stop with that stuff! lol!
Ding ding ding… mothereffing ding! Especially here in DC… I can’t recount how many times i’ve had dudes spit resumes as game like that’ll sway me. diva dudes indeed.
Yo, I know this post is revamped, but it’s on point. It’s so on point that I want to email this article to every DD I know. And, coming from ATL, there are PLENTY of them down that way.
The biggest flaw of the DD is the b*tchassness, aka passive aggressive behavior. They do everything they can possibly to do counteract getting a quality chick but they swear they are single because they are “picky” or have “standards” that no one understands. Thus, they continue to be douchebags and cite the very legitimate reasons why women don’t want to date them as the reason for their asinine behavior.
Thanks for categorizing what type of man this is. I’ve been trying to for years. I just called them b*tches, but this is much more descriptive and accurate.
I hate to admit this but the three most offensive Diva Dudes that I know are dudes that tried to pledge Kappa but were rejected. So I guess that the Diva Dude characteristic list may include a lot of Kappa Rejects too : o
Girl, yes! KappaRejects have short man syndrome. So close, yet so far away.
everything said in this post is spot-on.
my ex was exactly how you describe….and what do you know, he was a kappa that joined via a graduate chapter.
Girl, did we date the same man? Ha ha!
I have a feeling a lot of us on here fell for the Kappa lust-er (You know, the dude who always wanted to be a Kappa but couldn’t get the b*tchass undergraduate Kappas to pay him enough attention to let him on line. And, since he’s graduated and has the money to pledge now he’s gonna “show everyone” that he is/was just as good to twirl the kane. Ugh!).
this is why I only dated Kappas that pledged undergrad. I kid…kinda. LOL
long-time lurker. first time poster.
THIS is brilliant. i’m convinced the growing epidemic of diva dudes is reason #218 why we cant get nowhere as a people. my strong instincts, clean heart and stellar crew of homeboys and homegirls kept me free of entanglements with said douchebags all the way up until my mid thirties. but the one that managed to slither through to my heart stung me bad enough that i will NEVER make that mistake again.
in addition to the hyper-particularness you left out due to copy space, may i add that the diva dude also tends to:
a) casually make references to what he’s “entitled to” because of his resume/experiences/accomplisments/etc. [as if finishing from that ivy league grad school entitles his broke ass to anything but a degree and more debt...]
b) randomly muse about how much bigger/better/flyer/etc he is now as compared to when he was in high school. [THAT WAS TWENTY YEARS AGO, YOU COON!!!! YOU GROWN NOW!!!! LET IT GO!!!! damn.]
c) resort to bitchassisms like “i’m about to bust you out” when challenged during an argument. [no. words.]
d) talk about how much women like his “man-weight.” [no, loser. any "woman" who said that to you is either misdirecting generousity or is delusional. you're fat. push back from the table and hit the gym.]
e) never offer a genuine apology, striclty as a result of self-reflection. [black douchebags, indeed.]
thank you, champ.
All these posts have jogged my memory and gave me some things to add. I want to add that DD’s can be male groupies. They’d jock women for many of the same status associated reasons women jock men. For example (many are college related):
1. If you just crossed into a sorority and you the same ol’ person you were before (not acting brand new), they are in your face more because in their eyes your stock has risen.
2. You might pass DD and say “hi” and they give a lackluster greeting in response, but the minute you are in a group of people and engaging in a pleasant conversation, that DD can be 1000 paces away and he will yell your name across the yard to say “What’s up!” just so other people know that he knows you.
3. If you haven’t seen a DD in a long while and there is a reunion of sorts or homecoming, DD will not acknowledge anyone. He wants to wait until someone see’s him and acknowledges him first. He came to the reunion to see folks and floss, more than reconnect with anyone. He will lay in the cut with his shades on.
4. DD has nothing to do with the show, performance, or event, but he always has to be on the stage or on the field.
5. DD did pledge grad chapter and is setting out a most enthusiastic “hop” at the most inappropriate times and places. We at work dude. No one cares.
WOW is all I can say, smh. Didnt know that they existed until I met one and attempted to date one, and yes OH YES this ish is true, maybe not for all bc I only dated one and I cant speak on all but man I def hit 7 of these going back to my experience.
oh! rock the catbox reminded me. i dated a divo once that told me, “I am perfect for you.” misundertanding, i said, “awwwwwwwwww. you’re saying you think we’re perfect for each other?” this doughboy with breasts had the nerve to say, “no. i am saying that I am perfect–for YOU. perfect. i feel like i’m the closest thing there is to what you want.” um…..where in the hell do they do this at?
@charli skipper
LMAO!!!
“his doughboy with breasts had the nerve to say, “no. i am saying that I am perfect–for YOU. perfect. i feel like i’m the closest thing there is to what you want.”
NOOOOO! Cracking up in my office because of this. Wow…he was straight insane for that one.
ROTFL @ doughboy with breasts….DEAD
Reminded me of a dude who said, “you are so beautiful–to me” over and over, until I said, do you think you are the only mfer who thinks I’m beautiful? wth?!!! he was someone whom I affectionally refer to as Blue tooth Douche.
Man I just do not know any dudes like this. I know “of” a couple.. but d*mn, I can’t even think of one guy I ever dated that was like this. maybe I’m just allergic to b*tchassness and b*tchass ni@@as…
I do have a friend who unfortunately has a DD as a baby father/fiance, fits this bill to a T!! Including but not limited to:
- Is a total douche nozzle
- Well educated, is a dentist (yet refers to himself as “Dr…..” to everyone he meets
- Is in a frat
- Drives a luxury car
- Wears the requisite blazer, jeans and dress shoes at all times
- From what ive heard, sucks in bed
- Feels a need to tell everyone he meets about his profession in a not-so-subtle way. When I first met him, conversation went a little like this:
Him: So where in New York do you live?
Me: Brooklyn
Him: Yeah, New York’s cool. I did my dental residency there.
Me: Oh cool. So how do you like living here?
Him: Well you know, when I finished dental school….etc etc
And proceeded to mention being a dentist or dental school like 4 or 5 more times throughout to convo. You know how people like set you up by asking you and question which forces you to ask them a question back which allows them to talk about themselves? Ugh.
Last but not least… when he bought his new luxury car, he insisted on buying my friend a new luxury car as well.. Not because he’s a great guy and he loves her… No. Because he didn’t want to be embarassed when she’d meet him somewhere and she’s pulling up in a non luxury car. DEAD!!
OMG I had to post part of this on my blog (courtesy of you of course) because in my experience 3 and 9 go hand in hand and iDied laughing!!!!!!!!
Great Post Champ!
I also remember this one time this one guy was trying to talk to me but I wasn’t interested, so his last attempt was him saying “Well you know if I see you and I’m in my BMW/Lexus(can’t remember which luxury car) I’m not going to speak to. I was basically like good and tried to walk away. He then grabbed my arm and I could tell that he was upset that his luxury car schtick didn’t work.
Off top, the article pic is hilarious. Simple, yet eloquently captures the essence of bitchassness. But I’m interested in people’s thoughts on the other side of this. I’m the kind of dude that gets characterized as “too manly” by my girlfriend. Me personally, I think she’s just used to the more feminine types e.g. DD’s. Just because I don’t:
-Do anything with my hair that requires a wave kit.
-Get manicures or pedicures (but I clip the joints myself so they stay on the up & up)
-Type to her using IM speak (lol, omg, lls, etc. Admittedly I do think guys who OD on that are….different)
-Can’t name any of the chicks on ‘The Bad Girls Club’.
I definitely don’t consider myself a homophobe, but I do believe that men should act well, manly. Nothing wrong with that right?
And shoutout to RockTheCatbox too. The one about dude wearing the driving gloves had me on the floor.
@Manny B.
I’m curious about this too. I’ve also been called too manly. I can’t do the manicures, pedicures, and all that other foo-foo stuff. I work on my own cars, fix things in my house, and I don’t text a lot either. I never been a dude to keep a fresh weekly cut unless my job called for it.
@Manny B and Manny B,
Never change… no seriously- you good!
That’s looks hella disrespectful
I meant at Humble One and Manny B- lol
First I wanted to say too Manly?!!! Did I just read that? but I think I know what you mean. My friend is very delicate (men rush to her rescue for every little thing and I swear once she caught the vapors and swooned). Meanwhile, nobody believes I even have tear ducts. So my ideal match is kind of a bruiser/beast but she prefers the dudes in a DD’s uniform. Sh*t, I wish I did get stuck in a room with a man I could say is to manly…give me the dude who has poker night and talks sh*t with his boys, big game hunts and fishes, hell the negro could just carry boulders from one side of the road to the other…sexy stuff right there!! If it was 1826 he’d be in the field pulling a plow, no horse. some of yall ladies say amen.
@RocktheCatbox
“give me the dude who has poker night and talks sh*t with his boys, big game hunts and fishes, hell the negro could just carry boulders from one side of the road to the other…sexy stuff right there!! If it was 1826 he’d be in the field pulling a plow, no horse. some of yall ladies say amen.”
Sounds like you want a late 19th/ early 20th century white colonizer, field ninja, and Fred Flintstone rolled in one.
Amen!
I’ve been accused of not having tear ducts too, so I feel ya.
Diva Dudes
A SouthernCharm Original
Ahem…
Diva dudes: lame brothas, weirdos, they walk in we say, “there goes,
A Diddy doppleganger square in square toes,”
Refers to women as “females” making generalizations,
Catch him sippin’ cosmos to moisturize his situation,
Habitual line stepper, yeah, he stays bass ackwards,
Type of dude walk in the office and wearing his frat jacket,
Compliments from him? Facetious, kicks it with other divas,
“There he go!” bumpin’ Jaheim or Ray-J up in his Prius,
Ask him what’s been up and his response is always, “Chillin’,”
In Tyler Perry movies he would always play the villain,
Something like a metro, he would never ride the metro,
“Arizona” tea-sipper, I profile him like Pedro,
And really, I need no excuse cause ladies, yeah, y’all know these dudes,
Type to holla, turn around, then try to sell you Noni Juice,
Guess I’ll end my rant and there’s no need for ad libbing
Diva dudes, what are they? Three words: B*tch A** N*ggas!
“Arizona” tea-sipper, I profile him like Pedro,”
e-finger snap.
LOL @ Noni Juice!
Well said, brotha.
LMAO! Good ish!
@SouthernCharm
“Type to holla, turn around, then try to sell you Noni Juice,”
I forgot to mention how these dudes try to get you is some pyramid scheme like Primerica, Quixtar, or FHTM.
I am so glad I wasn’t drinking a beverage when I saw the Noni juice line.
How dope was that!!
? it!!
Of all the places I’ve ever lived, my current city (Washington D.C.) has the worst cases of DDs I’ve ever experienced. These dudes are hilarious to me!! It’s like all of them have consumed the same pink pill that has turned them into the posterchildren for diva antics. (feeling entitled, false importance, designer everything, glasses on in the club, juiced up hair, degreed ….and if they are halfway attractive; you will feel the “Im too pretty to talk to anyone” vibe all around them.
Although most of them never try to get at me (no surprise there….and I’m thankful), I do have 1 that has been trying to holla for quite some time. I’m still confused as to why he thinks he and I could be compatible. (blank stare)
Had to share this on my blog: http://kfdiaries.blogspot.com/2010/04/diva-dude-by-very-smart-brothas.html . Sent our readers straight to the source. You got right down to the heart of the matter with this one. Thanks!
All the DD’s I know wear bow ties to the club. They think they’re killing it with they’re outfit, but they’re only killing me.
I hate on bow ties and I am not ashamed.
Lol this post was hilarious. But i’m saying though, why they gotta be twirling blue and white sticks?
or crimson and creme if you wish…either way…they twirlin’
Awe. I’m mad I’ve pretty much missed out on good conversations on a great post for the 2nd time.
I swear while I was crying laughin at this post, 3 guys from my past came to mind. I’ll refrain from naming names out of respect to their mothers and one’s son.
This was AWESOME! Unfortunately I live in a metro area and find the sistas here perpetuate this just as much if not worse than the dudes. When I attempt to tell them otherwise, I’mm labeled as “bitter” or “man-hating”, yet I can have this honest conversation with my male friends.
I think the DD can only operate as long as there is a large population of educated sisters who ignore reason and drink the Essence magazine Kool-aid.
Wait, hold on….
…I’m lookin’ for my tambourine so I can cut up in the amen corner!!!
Time for my first comment ever:
1. This post is beyond hilarious. I think you just described Thursday nights at The Park for my DC folks. Why sir are you handing me your business card without even introducing yourself first? I am all for you having a job, ironing your shirt, brushing your teeth i.e. doing the things that grown people should do for THEMSELVES. Waving your credentials without showing your character=Diva Dude.
2. I know a lot of great greek men. However, the boys out there that send texts like “hey, karamel kutie, kan we kick it?” Need to realize that speLLing LikE thiZ is for people under the age of 18 and k is not an acceptable replacement for the letter c if you are in a certain (kough) organization.
@Curious Capital
“I think you just described Thursday nights at The Park for my DC folks.”
cosign!
You basically described a Kappa…at least a NY one.
I give great bl*w jobs and I have a Master’s degree. How you doin’?!
i spent the last hour of my life reading every single comment
i have laughed til i can laugh no more.
i want to gather you all for 1 giant e-hug. (yep..i said it..and what!?!).
i’ll blame the a-a-a-advil.
best.post.ever.*
(by ever i mean in the last 12 hrs ever). lol.
Not sure of the age range of cats here but I’m 35 and grew up in NJ and remember when K-Swiss were rocked like AF1′s bc they’re an all white sneaker. This wasn’t always the case but now I don’t wear anything but boots or shoes with jeans… sneakers are for working out and running around IMO. Overall I agree with the list
***I see the Nupe hate is strong on this thread lol.
I have noticed this phenomena in the rare recent times I’ve gone out. I have not observed it up close. Please tell me they’ve at least resisted the business/casual trend of wearing flip flops with designer jeans. I consider that a fireable offense. As in, fire away upon sight.
This post right here is Chuuch! DC is swarming with these dudes. I hate I’m all late commenting on it.
This sounds like the typical Morehouse nigga. They make up about 35% of the Morehouse student body. “Well-dressed”, love bowties and wearing shoes with no socks. They think they are extremely original but they all look the same. They wear clothes and accessories that are slightly gay; like V-necks that cut a little too deep or unisex sun glasses.
LOL! Reading the rest of the posts, I have to mention this really close encounter I had with this divo dude not too long ago, now I met dude randomly at a a gathering we hung out once after he seemed cool, I should have known something was array when the first time we hung out was at his place, and he could not stop talking about how he leased to own, and his Cadillac was so nice, and how he had just gone shopping and spent x amount of dollars at the mall, and then continued on to open his bills and make sure I heard he had paid them before we left for dinner, I let it slide because he seemed like he was good on paper, douche then sent me a video message of him fondling his jollies and then got upset when his text messages that followed were not answered, text messages of him begging for attention, and when I called him out on his thirstiness he started to insult me. After that I just kept it moving. hahaha ah! divo dude = douchebags without the hair gel and nicknames like “the situation” lol.
I definitely agree about the Kappas as DD’s but, what about the Bruhs who broke the mold? Don’t let a Bruh clean up nice AND hold a corporate job or they’ll all turn out like Steve Harvey who’s preaching that women should know how to “behave themselves” so we can keep a man. SMH
What possesses a “brother” to define himself with the word Diva? These guys, oops I meant Diva’s must have grown up in a fatherless home. To each his own I guess….
Quite an interesting topic. First time I have ever heard a name[DD] attributed to the combination of characterstics listed in this read. Definitely hilarious seeing as though I too have witnessed these H&M magazine cut outs on the night scene all up in the flashing lights. I almost hesitate to refer to them as males. Definitely a different species of men.
I must say, that I don’t agree with #5 or #10. In my opinion, those are not DD characteristics, but rather characteristics of someone who is on top of their game. There is no formula to being successful with women, so blindly following ‘traditional dating rituals’ in an ever evolving social climate can be counterproductive to your own efforts.
But no diss to the Champ(and I will probably get ostracized for this), but the write up almost permeates of a smidget of jealousy at the successful single lives led by these species of ‘Diva Dudes’. Sure, [generaly speaking of course] they tend to appear corny and repugnant to any ‘normal’ adult male, but you still cant be mad at them. All you can and should do is step your own game up and learn to think outside of the “traditional dating/social” box. This is 2010 not 1910. Sh*t done changed, especially women. *Please note that I maintain them DD cats are lame as all hell though*.
I HAD to comment on this….
I have never seen a Diva Dude in my life. I’ve seen selfish mofos. I’ve seen gay mofos. I’ve seen mofos who were confused about the sexuality. These “Diva Dudes” are what ladies used to call…wait for it….CONCEITED. You most definetly don’t want a man who the “Stop the Sag” campaign ad is aimed at and you don’t want a man who get’s all H&M on you. I get it. These dudes are just full of themselves and sooner or later, anything like that pops and that’s what will happen to these dudes. I think the entire dating world could use a dash of humility when dealing with each other. We could probably do better if our main goal was to make each other happy, instead of looking for ways to get an advantage. I believe there has been a sharp rise in narcissism, which has contributed to shit like this. It’s “me” and “I” world and that shit is just sad. We could get so much more done, if didn’t look at each other wich smiles on faces and malice in our hearts. The men and women who are of substance, are not always the one’s with the most, but the one’s who are willing to give the most. I would rather have a woman of modest means and looks but I knew I could count on in my dying days, then one who looked like a siren, drove a porsche and would leave at the drop of a hat…fuck that. Who needs that? Now…if I hear one of these dudes refer to themselves as a “Diva”….my man, I’ma lay yo ass out all over social media. Great, Great, Post!
Thank you for coining this term…I have noticed this loser trend in our black men ..n it turns my stomach…n the funny thing is they read this n still dont know its them
Where do I begin rip apart this article. First off it sounds like one of those pansy articles written by a closet DD to garner attention from women. One more piece of ‘blog-evidence’ a woman can feel good about justifying why she’s single.
Hmmmm…let’s start with #3. Why are women pissed b/c the man that they overlooked for years is now their only option? If that’s what’s left…take it or leave it. But obviously that’s not what a woman does, so she’s complaining that the man she want is in jail and taking it out on the DD who has been living his life the same way up to and including this minute.
Ooo #5 & #7. Women are proud of playing men for suckers and say some equally foul stuff about what they DO get out of men.
Sooooo…once again, women want equal pay, equal rights, equal everything REWARD, but don’t want to lift a finger with regards to carrying their own weight….until (allegedly) they are married…THEN they will share thing evenly! Riiiiiiiight?? I’ve said it before, I’ll say it again. These same bitter women who believe this crap are flakes. First they B&M about the dude who takes his hard earned money to pay for their meal and expects them to put out or get something in return. THEN they scream, “I got my own this and that…I don’t need a man to do jack for me.” So then a man who says, “Cool, let’s just hang. No sexual expectations or anything.” Then they complain he’s cheap. CRAZY
Let me break it down. If someone isn’t getting “something” in return, they are not going to invest jack. Man, woman, child, old, young, black, white, etc. That “something” could simply be your company, sex, getting away from the daily grind, your money, any combo, or anything in between. It’s up to YOU to figure out what is is (s)he wants as soon as possible and determine if what you’re getting in return is worth what you’re giving. PERIOD. Don’t need Redbook, Essence, scientific calculator or a blog to do the math on that one.
A gentleman who invites you out to dinner (and pays for it) seeks your company and companionship based on what he sees at the time of asking. It is HIS right to ask or not ask you as it is your right to accept or not accept. Asking you out should be viewed as a compliment and a gesture of respect and admiration….not a right.
So if more women stopped accepting dates as part of their overall annual budget savings, they would appreciate and respect the dude who just enjoys your company, but is not willing to contribute to her net worth at the expense of his own. Conversely, if they would BETTER appreciate the man who does invite them out as a compliment.
Several things…
1. This post fed my soul. Lol.
2. The problem is that DC (in particular) is so over-run by these no-sense-Negroes that the above-average sista CAN’T recognize them because that’s ALL she sees/meets… and she starts to think their behavior is normal and something is wrong with HER.
But not me. I’m from Brooklyn, and shit.
LOVE!
LMAO, i bet every single one will be here in the A for greek picnic, too.
THIS IS THE F*CKIN TRUTH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Debating on whether or not I should send this to this DD I know so he can feel special lol
Dude that wrote this sounds like a Straight Hater……Jealous that women are Picking these Guys over Him. Who ever heard of an Article bashing Men written by a Man? smh…..LOL
@Chris this article doesn’t bash men. It describes a certain sub-sect of men. Most of the men that I have sent this to have laughed about this article and said that they know men who Diva Dudes. LOL. The ones that didn’t laugh seemed to be the particular type of man described here…and they were UPSET.
Loved this
I’d content that the age range needs to be revised to 25+. I know diva dudes that are pushing retirement age.
Permission to cross-post please?
I have some of these tendencies. In my formative years I was awkward and bad at being cool so I do like the idea of being in demand and relentless exposure of women’s inability to see past all of my hotness and date the guys who are like I used to be instead. See I’m worse than a diva dude, because I’m not a real diva dude… I am the guy that makes women go out with the nice guy they should have dated in the first place. I’m a freaking superhero. Like the dark knight- and it is his destiny to be alone in the end, but look at all the good he’s done for his fellow man. I strive to be the reason that you see losers with woman that YOU think look to good for them on their arm. The sad part is, real DDs don’t end up alone. THe divorse rate is too high, they eventually get some divorsee who will own them and treat those DDs like the bitches they are til they die. Like everyone does anyways. Check out the website I posted. I’m in one of the videos.
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the fact that so many people are ‘relating’ to this blog only shows the sad state of affairs that we face as young black folks.
The fact that ‘smart brothas’ feel the need to recklessly slap a label on others similar to them is just play ridiculous. I don’t know that you can fit all those descriptions into one box. There are folks 30 yr old men that pledge grad chapters, there are men who make decent money and are educated that are looking for serious relationships etc. I would even go to suggest that even if there are any men that fit your ‘diva dude’ stereotype, there aren’t enough of them to make a statistical dent in the black male population.
Are there men who know and understand the possible benefits of being ‘an enddagered species’? Hell yes….but those that choose to take advantage of it are no more mature than the guy who is cheating on his girlfriend or not taking care of his child. We all grow at a different pace and are ready for certain things at certain times, no need for the labels because they only cause more damage.
Now you will have some, i ll say again….SOME…women use this as more of an excuse of why they are single. Not looking within themselves and/or challenging stereotypes, expecting more of men etc.
This is what happens when you give bored ‘smart people’ a device equipped with a keyboard, monitor and wifi access. This is only a problem when other equally ‘smart people’ start taking you seriously.
I have a problem with all types of labels, including ‘independent women’ etc. All equal opportunity.
Guess I should add that…I am greek, pledged undergrad freshman year, live in major city/college town, ugly ducklin? doubt it…i got mines, have a pretty wide variety of friends, def chivalrous, scapegoat on purpose when i need to, maybe according to your rules i m delusional lol, i m in a ton of party pics cause i have plenty of friends who host too many damn events and i date occasionally and just have friends w benefits sometimes.
Said all that to say….no guy is the same therefore labels are plain ridiculous even if it represents .000001% of the specific population
What about guys who think they might be gay? They should be full of divaness as well, right. This is a whole another article.
Brothers,
Wake up! This is bitter sister propaganda! If they were in our shoes (in a position to choose/refuse), they would work it just like we’re doing. Stay up and date the WHOLE spectrum and then pick the BEST one for you. Why, because you can.
P.S. Don’t play the sisters (or non-sistas) or dog them, just pick the BEST one. Also, don’t spend too much time with the “bad, bitter” ones because that will be time wasted.
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“part of being a grown man is doing the right thing without any expectation of acknowledgment or reward,”
You said a mouthful in that sentence. Well done.
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Damn there are a lot of #hurt sisters on this message board. Lol. Bitter much?
OMG I just read an article in this month’s issue of EBONY (The one with the cast of Red Tails on the cover) maybe some of you have read it. This guy was talking about love and how he changed his perspective on dating. I can’t remember what he was talking about but it definitely had that diva dudesque type flavor to it. LOL
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