We’ve had plenty of discussions about men and our propensity to rather date an attractive women with a less wordy resume versus a “6” with a gang of degrees. But you know, every now and then, a man will end up dating a woman that has everybody asking questions.
And alas, quite often I’ve seen an attractive woman dating a man with crip-walking teeth, or maybe even a fellow who would put on an ACTUAL WOOL sweater to come to a party in the middle of July in Washington, DC, during AKA week because apparently he thought he might get chilly since the temperature was supposed to drop ALL THE WAY down to 69. Somebody break out the mittens.
But I digress.
Fact is, in almost everybody’s catalog of “folks I dated”, there is a frog or two.
And do you know how it happens?
Do ya?
Do ya?
Go ahead. Take a gander. A goose if you must.
You talked to them.
Yep, it’s that simple.
Now, my guess is that this happens to women more than it does to men. If you can make a woman laugh, you have a 10/1 shot of at least getting 5 more minutes of conversation which is generally all you’ll need for her to let her guard down and say, “ya know what, he looks like Dennis Rodman but he seems nice, why not give him a shot to at least pay for my dinner once?”
This doesn’t work so well for men. For one, how often does a man intentionally approach an ugly woman? Not.often. Ugly men approach beautiful women all the time as they have nothing to lose. In fact, if I was a fuglysomebody, I’d ONLY approach banging chicks. And even moreso, I’d approach at least 8 a day. When ugly comes into play, the sheer number of people you address will increase your possibility of scoring a banging chick. Basically, somebody’s gonna give up the ghost and then you’re a success story. Even if it’s 1 out of 400, that one makes you a story worth discussing.
For a man to end up dating an ugly woman, he usually has to know her from the neighborhood and spent a lot of time getting to know her – almost to the point where he has to begin asking himself why NOT date her. We all do it. We find excuses to forego somebody we’re interested in because they look like lamps.
But women can be charmed. In fact, any women can be charmed, you can take that to the bank. And charm is half the battle. So if you’re a facially challenged brother out there, work on your personality because a great personality can win over a woman with an open heart who likes to smile. Women who never smile are evil and you should never speak to them.
And for my facially challenged women out there? Well…
…work on your head game and be rich.
Thank you and good night.
Check back for part ii tomorrow where I explain exactly HOW any woman can be charmed…
-VSB P aka THE ARSONIST
Yeah, I *know* i can be charmed by almost anybody. Big weakness of mine .
There are worse qualities.
Liz, we are usually here ><. Today we are here . It takes a lot to charm me, I find most men unengaging. But I will let a good looking man read me The Illiad in a packed club. An unattractive one? Better start tap dancing and pop locking, cause you got about 13 seconds before I’m OUT.
I was trying to say we are not >< today, we are .
DAMMIT! Why is it not showing up? Imagine these things (>) facing away from each other. Dammit.
True. Every bit of it. I’d rather have a man that went through the effort to charm me than one who sat in the corner afraid to approach me.
well, i don’t think he is just talking about the shyness factor!! it’s about the fact that we fugly guys (yeah, i’m one of them and damn proud of it) go for broke on a daily basis due to the fact that we have nothing to lose!! we have had to make a science out of being charming!! no to us means “not right now, but after about 2 more drinks and 5 more minutes of great conversation, you might be the right guy for at least the weekend!!!!”
LOL @ no to us means “not right now, but after about 2 more drinks and 5 more minutes of great conversation, you might be the right guy for at least the weekend!!!!”
I’ve definitely fallen for this one.
i’m telling you that it works so very well!! Keep searching and being persistent and wear them down!! They eventually give in and give us fugly guys a chance!!!
“not right now, but after about 2 more drinks and 5 more minutes of great conversation, you might be the right guy for at least the weekend!!!!”
lol. this literally made me laugh aloud
Right! And I say there is absolutely nothing wrong with that approach. Charm and persistence with get you everywhere.
Bullsh*t and confidence will ALSO get you everywhere in life.
“Bullsh*t and confidence will ALSO get you everywhere in life.”
I will have to concur with you on that one Panama… I have given a lot of mofo’s a chance because they had a certain swagger about them… For example, Jay Z looks like a Camel but that doesnt stop him from receiving mad play especially from “the baddest chick in the game.” He excudes a whole lotta confidence that draws women to him like a magnet!!
confidence doesn’t produce cute kids and the sooner beonayz realize the better the world will be for the future of man kind
LOL @ Mikki!!! That IS true
they dont have to be cute they will be trust fund babies.
His net worth didn’t hurt either. Do you think Beyonce would be with him if he were a broke ninja in the Marcy Projects when she met him? I mean, his swag (I know) helps, but confidence alone couldn’t pull her. She was not as famous as she is now when they started dating, either.
I agree. There always has to be more than just one thing that makes an attraction to someone last past the beginning stages. I don’t see anyone getting married solely on the fact that “Oh, he’s great swag,” or “She damn sure knows how to clean a house!” They might not be perfect, but there has to be more substance behind it.
Bullsh*t and confidence?
I think he means any man that can confidently bullshit his way through anything….
Like you can’t be ugly and say, girl I “think” you should be giving me business.
you say I know its in your best interest to give me the draws and then proceeded to explain how if she does she can cause the world not to go into a recession by doing so.
LMAO!!! I am crackign up at my desk…. that’s the bullsh*t part for real!!
I know it’s true and this is how the world turns. It’s just seeing it spelled out in front of me.
Mikki summed it up nicely. But it works in all facets of life. I’m speaking of the ability to convince people to believe in you despite all reason to the contrary.
Or. Walking into an interview with an employer with a 2.5 GPA and skillfully convincing him that your 2.5 is equal to or better than a person’s 4.0 b/c your 2.5 came with life experience that didn’t manifest itself just in the classroom of college, but of life. You see, that 2.5 represents the GPA of a man who wanted to experience all that life had to offer and teach. And you welcomed that challenge with open arms.
Plus, those test are culturally biased.
Bullsh*t and confidence will ALSO get you everywhere in life.
This isn’t in the running for a t-shirt?
Really?
“Bullsh*t and confidence will ALSO get you everywhere in life.
This isn’t in the running for a t-shirt?
Really?”
i dont know. it has some stiff competition
Im fiiiiiiiiiirst!!!
(harlem shake w/ some “dougie” thrown in for good measure)
ok…first of all hooduhfuk said a 6 was “ugly”? to me, u gotta be real below sea level for me to want to spondoo your face…but a 6 (male or female) is salvageable… but I completely agree on the “charm” turning an ugly duckling in almost a goose…not quite a swan, but maybe close…
however, Pana-manly, ur post alludes to the fact the princess charming effect is an urban legend…so, I really wanna ask the guys…why doesnt that charming shit work for women? cuz I really thought it did…
“why doesnt that charming shit work for women? cuz I really thought it did…”
because socialization and evolution has made it so. (read: “we’re generally shallow bastards”)
“we’re generally shallow bastards”
You cant be THAT bad.
Not true. We CAN be that bad.
We’ve alluded to this before. Most of us will date a problem “9″ over an easy “6″ everyday of the week. Somehow, attractiveness is easier to put up with than bustedness.
At least while you’re still young and foolish enough to enjoy a little drama.
Somehow, attractiveness is easier to put up with than bustedness.
I agree…I don’t care how charming you are…if you’re busted…I’m disgusted…to me, a 6 is not “busted”…to me, a 3 is “busted” ya dig? a 6 can get a perm and a new dress and be like a 7.75…but ain’t no saving a 3…
Well where does the accessibility come into play?
I don’t know if I’m a good enough person to deal with an “accessible” 5 over a busy-as-the-fuck 8.
Pana-mack…
I am glad you know that about yourself…I am going to put a gold star by your name on GP for honesty…lol…
The Arsonist says: “At least while you’re still young and foolish enough to enjoy a little drama.”
Amen
ok…i wasnt first by the time i clicked “submit”…but i was first when i started typing my comment…lol
Damn……pick your face up sweetheart…..i know it hurts, just sit down over there and i’ll be over to console you. We will pretend this never happened, and that you can tell time, and that it didn’t take you 14 minutes to submit the comment. I still love you! LOL!
BigBuck…you’re sweetness and ability to console have been duly noted and put in your file….lol…but in my defense…I was commenting from my phone…I shoulda been sleep…but wasn’t…
BTW… “datfya”? check it out… I’m waiting…
I’m not sure what I am checking sweetheart…………
BigBuck…”That’s Mr Buckingham to you!!” I would think you would know your own URL…lol
Of course I know that baby! I just didn’t know what you wanted me to check out. I’m a little slow today, work with me!
lol…just check your messages…
“If you can make a woman laugh, you have a 10/1 shot of at least getting 5 more minutes of conversation… But women can be charmed. In fact, any women can be charmed…”
This is so true. There have been some dudes additional attention just because they were charming. That is my kryptonite (dag on charming mofo’s…)
“And for my facially challenged women out there? Well…
…work on your head game and be rich.”
LOL! This is so wrong, it can’t get no wronger.
“LOL! This is so wrong, it can’t get no wronger.”
lol…i’m sure it can be wronger. don’t underestimate our ability to be wrong
What about an awesome head game, an associate’s degree, a double D cup, a seven in the face with a plus sized waist?
How far will that get me? I mean her?
Gigi
I believe this will take your real far sis.
Well the Double-D cup and plus sized waist puts you in the game from jump. A 7-face gets you to, perhaps I should talk to her and see if she can add.
I am confused-ed…I thought a plus size waist took away point? do the double d’s trump plus size waist? what is a plus size waist exactly? I can’t see my feet, but it’s because of my d’s…lol…I am really trying to make sure I’m following today’s lesson correctly?
There just has to be a balance. Tig o biddies can balance out a lot of percieved flaws. Waht do you mean by plus sized waist? You know the negro likes em thick so how is this a bad thing?
Add? You mean simple arithmetic or the quadratic equation?
I mean simple addition. The fact that she knows the quadratic equation exists is a definite plus.
Of course, if she’s just blowing smoke and I say, “really, what IS the quadratic equation” and she spits some non-sense, it’s a wrap dun-dun cuz now she’s just a cheater.
“if she’s just blowing smoke and I say, “really, what IS the quadratic equation”
Of course she knows what it is. She factors polynomials for fun.
think it depends on the quality of man. I find that the more money a man has (disregard celebrity) the smaller the waistline of his woman. Plus size waist= larger than 36…thats waist NOT hips.
“think it depends on the quality of man. I find that the more money a man has (disregard celebrity) the smaller the waistline of his woman.”
i read a study about this, how the type of woman that a guy’s attracted to is determined in part by his socioeconomic upbringing/status.
And what did the study conclude (though i’m sure we can guess)?
p.s. this is why I *heart* VSB. Cause Champ and Panama are the types of dudes who read studies and ish. Just a sidebar…carry on.
This is fact!! You RARELY see wealthy men with a fat wife or girlfriend. I think this has something to do with cats from the hood gravitating toward the thicker. To a lot, the thicker the better.
On the other hand, the boy who comes from a well-off family may be socialized to look at the same ‘thick’ as being ‘fat’ – therefore, unattractive. Better health and eating habits also comes with wealth so this is a factor too.
*Jumps for joy, because she does NOT have a “plus sized waist” by this standard!!!!*
Gigi,
Don’t go throwing those stats around all willy nilly like that…or one of these negroes is going to wife you and turn you into a good wholesome woman.
waiting for tomm. to see how we can be charmed….
as for “frogs in the catalog”… Never have, never will. Though “ugly” and unattractive are all relative, I have never dated a man that would be universally considered ugly or by majority rule – unattractive.
………an I’m anti-okie dokie…..I can see through the “charming” bs
to men ugly is universal. beauty or how fine a girl is can be debated but ugly is never debated and always agreed upon.
“beauty or how fine a girl is can be debated but ugly is never debated and always agreed upon”
I’ve found this to be true.
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
ugly is written in stone. there is no avioding or changing it. it is written, so shall it be
Yeah, I’m going to have to agree with you here. ugly is very much set in stone.
Alright, alright…lol
fellas…can we copy and paste some links to what universal ugly is?
ladies…can we copy and paste some links to what debateable ugly is?
IMO, this is the “india” theory all over again…I say sh e looks like a modern day “ceelie” and others say she’s cute…and although her Color-Purple-ish-ness has been refined/styled into something that more closely resembles a reject from Good Times…she’s still walking abstract art…that looks like she has chitterling breath…no?
I’ma take a stab at this…here go my picks…
Universal Ugly Chick: Macy Gray
Universal Ugly Dude: Beetlejuice from Howard Stern
I realize that no matter how ugly a girl is there is a dude out there somewhere thatll bone. Ugly and bonability meet up whe you ask this question…..would you announce to your people that you boned her? Would you walk with her on your arm?
I agree w/the universal ugly dude, but not the chick. Macy isn’t to me so much as unkept/wild looking. Now, a better pick for me would be Sheryl Underwood, the comedienne…
sadly there are dudes that would bang both of them, even be seen in public with them.
yeah, even though i find macy gray aggresively unattractive, i wouldnt be surprised if someone thought that she was attractive. camilla bowles parker, on the other hand, looks like one of the construction workers from “fraggle rock”, and to me is a universal ugly
@CHAMP…you saying CPB looks like a gotdam “doozer”?? ahhhh… I just ran out of my cube! I always thought she looked like a drag version of Charles…
“I always thought she looked like a drag version of Charles…”
she actually does, lol
I think the concepts of bonable and non-bonable have to be considered as well cause I think thats the main idea or root of the discussion.
word…im still tryna find a healthy example of unbonable…
Monique
@ Deviant
CTFU
Flava Flav SHOULD be unbonable. What is this world coming to?
“I say sh e looks like a modern day “ceelie” and others say she’s cute…and although her Color-Purple-ish-ness has been refined/styled into something that more closely resembles a reject from Good Times…she’s still walking abstract art…that looks like she has chitterling breath…no?”
I just spit my coffee out reading this.
“I say sh e looks like a modern day “ceelie” and others say she’s cute…and although her Color-Purple-ish-ness has been refined/styled into something that more closely resembles a reject from Good Times…she’s still walking abstract art…that looks like she has chitterling breath…no?”
This is pure comedic genius!!!! WOW! LMAO!
I just wanted to stop by and say hola! I missed this blog when I was away for 9 WHOLE days! It was murder on my psyche. I really don’t know how I got through it. I have to catch up and see what topics I will get inspiration from (read: swagger jack, LOL) *muah* Viva la VSB!!
thanks for stopping by and shit
LOL
Charm/Flattery or whatever you want to call it might put a smile on the face but that’s just it. It has to be more there than charm.
Charm can be broke and have you trying to bail him out of jail so charm doesn’t do much for me these days…but that’s just me. Give me more than charm…and being a 6 isn’t bad…:)
but charm got you to answer that collect call from the county lock up!! obviously charm got him a lot further down that road than you think!!
Don,
Not. Maybe years ago or even a few years ago, but this day and time–it doesn’t. You have to have more than “charm” going for you.
Im sorry Don, but the only thing charm might do…. and that’s a tough might…. is get my panties off….
thats the goal mostly everythign else is a bonus.
“Im sorry Don, but the only thing charm might do…. and that’s a tough might…. is get my panties off….”
thats quite enough in itself.
that’s the ultimate goal!!!
Hey fellas I said tough…. Just because you around here being Casanova and sh*t don’t mean you gonna get to see the Vickie’s!!
then someone else will share their secrets
but it’s still a possibility!! until i see those legs snap shut like a bear trap there is always a possibility!!
” until i see those legs snap shut like a bear trap there is always a possibility”
LMAO!!!!!!!!!
LOL @ Don!
Touchdown!!
Being a 6 isn’t bad. But how many people really wake up and say, “you know what, I’m a 6. it is what it is.”
Either there are way more self-reflective and honest-with-themselves people in the world (which I don’t believe at all), or you folks just like to champion the underdog.
damn…you got the kid wondering if she’s a and shit…(smh)
“Either there are way more self-reflective and honest-with-themselves people in the world (which I don’t believe at all), or you folks just like to champion the underdog.”
Champ, 6 is still above average…not perfect but not too bad either…I think more folks fall into this area than below or above.
Perhaps I’m a bit skewed, but I went to college in the Atlanta University Center. A 6 to me is just a chick I’d never pay any real attention to if not for some extenuating circumstances. That means she can’t be above average. She just exists.
Panama it’s not just you. That’s when other things do have to come into play…what makes the average person stand out from the rest. A person’s personal style can be the key; their personality and yes even their charm (smile)…but something about them besides being average does catch your attention–and pushes them from the average category to someone you may want to get to know.
I agree. 4,5, and 6′s are the people that just exist. They take up space, their hearts beat, they aren’t pretty or ugly, they are just there. They aren’t head turners in either a good or bad way.
I think most 4,5′s and 6′s aspire to be head turners- it must suck not to be noticed one way or the other. So they work on the charm, clothes, etc. Which goes to an earlier point about paying compliments to your less than attractive girlfriend..everyone wants to be noticed.
the scale goes something like this:
0-1: wildebeest looking fugly!!
2-3: fugly!!
4-6: average
7-8: attractive
9-10: ________insert your own fantasy person’s name here….for me, stacey dash (got a thang for the cougars)!!
but still, beauty is in the eye of the beholder and what one man’s/woman’s opinion about what is an 8 could be another’s 3!! it’s all about your personal preference and what appeals to you!! some may take the apple bottoms over the face, some may like the melons more, some may want the all-around package, while others want something no one else will want so they will never be alone!!
now as for me, as fugly as i am and with the abundance of charm i have in my pocket, if i spend 2 hours in a spot, hit on 10 different women, come out with 4 numbers and have 2 of the 4 numbers to be correct with correct names….i’d say i had a great night!!
if i spend 2 hours in a spot, hit on 10 different women, come out with 4 numbers and have 2 of the 4 numbers to be correct with correct names….i’d say i had a great night!!
WTF??? damn! (thanking God I am not a man)
when you are working off charm alone, then it is what it is!! i’m not tall dark and handsome (more like short, fat and high yellow), but my inviting smile and my sense of humor gives me a good advantage over the guys who just sit and look pretty!!
I can completely see that being the case…since all we (here on vsb) know of you is non-physical…but I bet even though you are self proclaimed “short, fat and high yellow” you are probably still a handsome man…you know? or maybe not..cuz I don’t know what you look like…but your personality can definitely get an ego stroke from me…
now as for me, as fugly as i am and with the abundance of charm i have in my pocket, if i spend 2 hours in a spot, hit on 10 different women, come out with 4 numbers and have 2 of the 4 numbers to be correct with correct names….i’d say i had a great night!!
I guess it’s a numbers game for you huh? LOL
not really a numbers game….just the odds are ok enough for me!! mainly because i’m shooting out of my league…..its as if i am playing 1st to 10 against kevin garnett and only get 2 points, i’m doing good just to get those two!!
I see…I see.
Don, you’re comment is straight-up gospel. Honestly Don, I think this is pretty much what most men will experience on any given night.
Oh and your scale is dead on accurate!
Location plays an important role. I grew up in upstate NY where a 6 is like a dime piece to most of the guys here. The women do not put effort in their appearance here and every girl who’s slightly attractive gets a lot of attention. But a 6 in a city like ATL and Miami might not even get a second look.
“you know what, I’m a 6. it is what it is.”
LOL!
I think men are more likely to be content with admitting, “hey, I’m a 6, fuck it” than women. Both, men and women, may try to do things to change their ‘score’, but women tend to go through greater extremes.
Women can be charmed; I have been charmed. I actually perfer a man’s charm over his looks. I would much rather be with someone who made me laugh over someone that everyone thought was a very good looking. Personality is so important to me and being able to hold a good conversation is mandatory. It’s easy to help a brother find better clothes, get a nice hair cut and shave properly. But if he’s dumb as rocks there is nothing that can be done. If he is as interesting as a wet napkin there is nothing you can do. Is this woman logic?
So where does that leave all the average women? Single and lonley? I don’t think that’s the case. I think that like Fulanigirl said attraction is realative. There is someone out there for everyone. Mo’nique is married and we all know how most of the men on this board feel about her looks.
I think all this attention on a women’s physical appearance can make men seem shallow. Just recently Young Berg said that he didn’t do dark women. He said that he just didn’t like dark booty. He also said that he has a pool test. He only dates women who look sexier coming out of the pool then when they went in. Is this how most brothas feel?
Here’s the link if you want to listen
http://theybf.com/2008/07/10/btch-please-young-berg/
and then his wack ass apology
http://allhiphop.com/stories/multimedia__video/archive/2008/07/11/20281172.aspx
who the phuc is Young Berg?
That dude is like 19 years old…and a wack ass mc at that. His opinion is just that…his opinion.
His opinion is null and void.
Dealing with opinions one must always consider the source.
Sorry Monk, but I’m stealing this line…this is some intelligent sh*t!
It’s yours bruh.
True. I’ve dated Fugly but b/c he was super intelligent, charming, and quite successful.
You forgot to add in all ur wisdom that if charming comes with a high 5/6 figure salary…looks go WAAAAAAAYYYY out the window.
But yeah…men who make me laugh have a MUCH better shot at the goods than those who don’t.
“You forgot to add in all ur wisdom that if charming comes with a high 5/6 figure salary…looks go WAAAAAAAYYYY out the window.”
For 6 figures and a sugar daddy mentality a whole lot goes out the window.
“For 6 figures and a sugar daddy mentality a whole lot goes out the window.”
like happiness.
No, not happiness.
LOL
“like happiness.”
Simple truth…this made me laugh out loud for real.
True. I’ve dated Fugly but b/c he was super intelligent, charming, and quite successful.
I have NEVER dated “fugly”…but my girls that have…say they get treated better…and the sex is award winning…hmmmm…(quietly contemplating the fug-factor)
I want to know how they got past the kisss? he had to be spending money.
Welp..here goes. This is my opinion..Im not saying its right but…this is what ive observed…
Men are visual creatures. They see the external first..then that determines whether or not they want to get to know a woman better. Although women are external as well, they tend to also look more internally. Character is a big issue for a woman and carries a good bit of weight when thinking about wanting to spend some more quality time with a man.
you are quite close!!
AJA,
I agree reference a person’s character. A persons character is way more important than charm in my book any day.
Women are more internal looking b/c men do all the approaching and trying to holler at you. It gives you the opportunity to even realize this person might have something else to offer.
Most men aren’t approaching swampdonkies so we couldn’t care less about their internal beauty. unless we met them in school or online. in which case, all that goes right out the window.
hmm…except it doesn’t. in my more shallow days, if i met a chick online (via chatroom or forum or board) i was oft times disappointed when she wasn’t hot if i’d spent a lot of time getting to like her. at the point i found her to be swampdonkeyish, i found my interest waning.
hmm…except it doesn’t. in my more shallow days, if i met a chick online (via chatroom or forum or board) i was oft times disappointed when she wasn’t hot if i’d spent a lot of time getting to like her.
I can SO agree with that…the most interesting men I have met online have been less than classically attractive in person…or short…or both…lol…although I can overlook short…to a degree…ugly is a deal breaker…vsb, for example…we spend WAY too much time together er’day…and I don’t know what most of you look like…and I (I think) like it that…don’t destroy my fantasy…
“although I can overlook short…to a degree…ugly is a deal breaker”
Panama and Goodeness, lol. I admit besides character, something about the man does have to be attractive…whether it’s his eyes, his smiles, dimples or something…
“something about the man does have to be attractive…whether it’s his eyes, his smiles, dimples or something…”
This is so true. There have been times where analyzing certain physical traits of a man lead to me falling for them. The charm and characteristics were the things that kept him in position to be analyzed in the first (at lest for me).
“although I can overlook short…to a degree…ugly is a deal breaker”
I agree…there is a dude I’m talking to right now, and I feel like I’m being shallow because he’s 5’4.
That is the only reason I haven’t been feeling him for real.
@T-LEE…a short dude with Napoleon syndrome and a regular short dude are two different animals…is he’s dope aside from his short-ness…and he isn’t “short” in other areas (which is why I have a a must be this tall to ride motto)…then, there has got to be more to your “unreadiness” than just his height…and if not…then..yeah you’re shallow (lol), but if you can’t like him for real and he likes you for real…let him go…
I’m 5’9 so this is why I have had such an issue with this.
He’s got a think for tall girls…I just don’t think I can do it though.
Oh wow. I don’t think i could do it either.
Hey…we’ve been talking for a year, so maybe there is hope, I’m starting to lean towards the fact that I’m shallow. (lol)
well I am 5’3.5 and I would be hard pressed to date a man that was 5’4, so I KNOW I am shallow…LOL….
Ya feel me Goodeness?! LOL
5’4″ is really short for a dude. I know it happens, but that’s just rough. But i’m sure it’s extra to me because I’m 5’10″. If you are like 5′, i’d imagine it’s doable.
yea, theres difference between acceptibly short and shorter than you…
See, I can excuse a whole lot in terms of looks w/the appropriate personality…but height is non-negotiable. I’m 5’8′, and on the few occasions I’ve dated someone shorter (like 5’6″ or under)…EYE felt weird, like I was with a munchkin or something. Then I couldn’t wear a heel, so as to not make it more obvious…nah, not cool. SHORT is a dealbreaker…
I’m with JBoogie… I am 4’11.5″ I’ll be damned if I am dating someone who is damn near my height!!! 6’0″ and above to ride this ride…
I need to be able to feel like Im climbing a tree… Like a OAK TREE….. i don’t wanna fool with a BUSH!!!!
“(insert height) to ride this ride.”
I think this is the 2nd VSB t-shirt for today.
I’m 5?8?, and on the few occasions I’ve dated someone shorter (like 5?6? or under)…
But 2 inches isn’t bad. I’ve dated guy who was just an inch shorter than me and that wasn’t bad…but I have a problem with 5 inches…that’s a serious difference.
“Swampdonkey”…I LOVE it! I know a few folks I’m applying this to immediately!
I’ve been charmed by a lesser-than-attractive woman a time or two in my day. The thing is, we had a lot in common so conversation came easy and she brought a lot more character and qualities to the table than other females. In short, she was very catering and knew how to treat a man without being a push-over. Even though my college roommate at the time questioned my choice (she was about a ’6′), once he tasted her cheesecake, he knew what the deal was.
Charm won’t go as far on a man as it does on a woman, but if it comes with a package of other qualities, it can really lead to something special.
The messed up part is I ended it when that ’9′ came along. Being more mature now, I realized my mistake and I’ve dealt with it, but I always wonder what would things be like if I would’ve stayed. Oh well.
“Even though my college roommate at the time questioned my choice (she was about a ‘6?), once he tasted her cheesecake, he knew what the deal was.”
am i the only one who thought “cheesecake” was a euphemism at first?
No Shay…I did as well, until I figured he was really talking about actual cheesecake.
Y’all nasty…LMAO!!
You’ve got a good point. I’ve found girls who are lacking in the looks or body department stay cooking, cleaning, and helping a guy with administrative tasks, way sooner in the relationship than would be considered normal. She’s trying to remind him of why he should keep her around.
I believe Darwin called this “survival of the fittest”
Mobb Deep called it that too.
Mobb Deep trumps Darwin in this scenario…
Where’s my Quiet Storm remix when I need it ?
inside of lil kim’s breast augmentation playing on repeat.
Pure silliness.
Bottom line guys like eye candy. Most if not all guys want that girl who when they step in the room with her their boys will at least say to themselves “ole girl is cute/fine”. Now this desire of acceptance from one’s boys usually and should subside as maturity sets in.
I have dated 2 chicks who I was not all that attracted to but they had mad personality. Bad thing is that women tend to want/need compliments about how they look. When the first girl I dated asked me why I never commented her on how she looked like she did me my 18 year old mind thought of a way to dodge the question at the moment but she eventually picked up on the fact that I was not all that physically attracted to her and dipped. So my lesson learned is that if you date an unattracive female throw out a compliment every now and then to throw her off the trail.
“So my lesson learned is that if you date an unattracive female throw out a compliment every now and then to throw her off the trail.”
lol…you’re describing her like she’s a hounddog
Lmao!
Nah I’m just saying she was not cute and she called me on never complimenting her so my advice to all those guys in the world who decide to date a chick that is aesthetically challenged is to throw her a compliment on how cute she looks every now and then or else she will pick up on the fact that you don’t find her all that attractive physically.
You must be one of those people who doesn’t wear their true feelings on their face and can get away with a false-positive.
Me? No way in hell. I’d give up a compliment that they knew was untrue. This is why i couldn’t date ugly women…my face would give me away at any time they started talking about how “hot” they were.
Trust my face gives it all away that is why she picked up on it. I am super animated so I can no longer deal with less than attractive chicks. I was just giving a psa for dudes that choose to go there.
PD Jakes: “my face would give me away at any time they started talking about how “hot” they were.”
Hahahahahaha!!
I’ve been in this situation (not with someone I’m ‘with’), and I couldn’t hold my laughter in. Started chuckling and had to quickly play the shyt off, but I know she knew I was laughing at the far-fetched comment she made about herself being fine.
“…aesthetically challenged is to throw her a compliment on how cute she looks every now and then…”
Conscience i’ll throw that ass a bone or a chew toy but dat about it.
i defer to the logic of the honorable Robin Harris: RIP. SALUTE!
“bitch i’m going to the moon i’ll be back in a coupla days.”
“ok but but bu please don’t call me a bitch in front of the kids.
“aaight ho, i’m going to the moon…”
a ugly woman don’t [shouldn't] want no trouble. …according to Robin.
i concur. (just cause it’s funny)
Co-Sign.
she eventually picked up on the fact that I was not all that physically attracted to her and dipped.
so she was like repulsive or sumn…shit! you were hitting that though, I bet..man…come on? I can’t see dating someone I couldn’t even genuinely give a compliment too…(making the stink face)
LOL!
Um no I was not hitting it. I could not bring myself to do it.
My face never gave away the fact that I was not attracted to her simply because I never payed her a physical compliment. I never said anything directly or indirectly about her physical being. That is what she called me on.
well as long as you weren’t bumping uglies (which from your description could be be taken a few different ways) I guess you aren’t as mean as I initially gave you credit for…lol…cuz smashing the unsmashable is like the 13th commandment or some shit…
You see the beauty and the beast coupled up more in the caucasian sect. I don’t know if it is those men are more charming or the women as less shallow.
My husband and I were watching Still Standing one day and he stated that you will rarely see an overweight less attractive woman with a fit and fairly attractive man. He is correct.
Woman are more forgiving in the looks department.
Raqi i think you’re right that women are more forgiving in the looks dept. however they are probably a lil less forgiving in the pocket department. [versus men]
men are more forgiving in the pocketbook and brains dept., yet less forgiving in the looks dept. [versus women]
gotta lot of homies who tend to like good looking, fine but non-sensical women.
Big said: bitches, i likem brainless guns i likem stainless (steel)
as for me, i likem sexy and cute in the face and the vine i likes proportionate or voloptuous.
at the end of the night we’re all who-errs just with different price tags.
women are more forgiving in the looks dept. however they are probably a lil less forgiving in the pocket department. [versus men]
@Geniud Khan…this makes such sense…
this is why you’re HOT!
thankyou baby. bite lower lip and spank thine ass.
Word up GK I saw “The Wackness” this weekend and to see Ben Kingsly spit ‘bitches, i likem brainless guns i likem stainless ‘ got lots of laughs.
And our price tags are just that. Different not necesarily higer or lower but different
is “The Wackness” a real movie? i haven’t seen that one but i can’t imagine Ben doing his best Big Smalls nicca shit ur draws interpretation.
Yeah Method Man did a small role in it too. It’s pretty good got sex drugs and rap music. Kind of an Indie film. It was something to see him in the role too.
“You see the beauty and the beast coupled up more in the caucasian sect. ”
i agree 100 percent. we (black people) generally stay within 1.5 “points” of each other (ie a “6″ being with anyone from a “4.5.” to a “7.5″ ), but, from what i’ve seen, our much, much lighter skinned neighbors might have a range as big as 4 points.
just yesterday, i noticed a white couple where the guy as about as dorky as dorky can be and the woman was, for lack of a bad term, “bad as hell”, and i remember thinking to myself, “there no way in hell he would have bagged her if they both were black”. yet, you see pairings like this with them all of the time
“i noticed a white couple where the guy as about as dorky as dorky can be and the woman was, for lack of a bad term, “bad as hell”, and i remember thinking to myself, “there no way in hell he would have bagged her if they both were black”.”
LOL! This is true. I also see this trend more in Asian couples. I lived in China last year and would see really pretty girls with let’s just say not so attractive guys.
I was trying to figure out how would I fit in this conversation today. But here goes. I had a quote on my page a week ago or so that said “I heard that someone in the relationship is going to be ugly so I guess it will be you.” I think 9 times out of 10 one of the 2 people in the relationship is going to be ugly. I dont mean u have to be ugly as hell but one is cuter than the other. Think of some people u know in relationships and u wonder HOW IN THE HAY DID THEY GET TOGETHER?!!?! I dont think charm gets you very far in these situations. Your personality plays a big role. and u cant be that darn ugly because I have to wake up beside you every morning and know that I am not having a nightmare.
Now I myself give myself a 7 because 10 is perfect and nobody I know is perfect. the other 2 points are the weight. But my face and my appearance give me the thumbs up in my opinion.
white women are rather forgiving of physical flaws.. .particularly when there is money and security involved.
So I always assume that dude is standing TALL and BEAUTIFUL on his wallet.
“My husband and I were watching Still Standing one day and he stated that you will rarely see an overweight less attractive woman with a fit and fairly attractive man. He is correct. ”
Actually I saw this yesterday. The guy was a cutie, or and the girl was well…not. Come to think of it I saw it two weeks ago too. Both caucasian couples.
“a great personality can win over a woman with an open heart who likes to smile.”
Oh yes! I love a guy with a great personality especially one who can make me laugh. I will take a guy who I can connect with on a mental level over one who just looks good. Ideally, I’d like to have both but there’s just something about a guy with a great personality.
“Oh yes! I love a guy with a great personality especially one who can make me laugh. I will take a guy who I can connect with on a mental level over one who just looks good.”
Eye candy is great…in small doses…for me. But if I don’t connect with you on a mental level…that’s all it will be…a small dose.
‘Tis true…I will take personality/charm over looks any day. Nothing worse than a hot guy with an effed up mentality/personality. That less-than-attractive guy, coupled with a fab personality, can be worth his weight in gold, so to speak…
“ya know what, he looks like Dennis Rodman but he seems nice”
At one point (about 15 years ago), I wanted to give him this bidness…lol
I just figured he’d be a freak and could take care of me 8 ways from Sunday…but I digress.
You’re right, if you have a personality most women will let the looks slide. I know I have a few times…lmao!!! A mean tongue does wonders!!!!
“A mean tongue does wonders!!!!”
first t-shirt quote of the day
She’s right!
For the moment, but if that’s all he has, it wont last long, but there will be fond memories.
Thanks for the t-shirt opp.
@T-LEE
“A mean tongue does wonders!!!!”
hell yeah it does…and then…it runs after your truck!!!
Damn you were really traumatized by that! Lol! Just be thankful you escaped the crazy before you got attached!
@Dom…it was very traumatic…lol…and he was the most nothing-ass…craziest….scariest…most “not my regular” looking dude…so all the BS that we say “awww he won me over” applies to him…lol…he has played an active role in every “WTF was I thinking” moment that I’ve eer had!!
thats what we callem out here too goody “nothin ass ho’s” it take my boy to say it with the right voice inflections and grimace on his face. i falls the fuc* out when i hear it.
these [empahsizes>>>] NOTHIN…………….ass ho’s!
LOL!!
I use the same terminology when referring to these type of men…minus the “ho”…mine usually comes out as “nothin’ a** n*ggas”.
I personally am not really to let looks slide. I think looks start to slide as you become older, cuz maybe at 35 your not as banging as you was at 25 ie a couple more pounds or a lil receding hair line.
For all of the ladies out there with a less than viable visage…there is hope. I humbly submit, the Tameka Raymond model. Yes, Usher’s homely wife stands as a living testament to so-so looking women everywhere. How was a woman who is mediocre at best able to land a world-wide celebrity husband? One word: Accessibility. Accessiblity is the female equivalent of charm. Men can be highly visual(read superficial) creatures, but I implore you, do underestimate our laziness. Time and time again men will opt for the route with fewer obstacles. When Usher went to get a soda, Tameka was there. When Usher did his taxes, Tameka was there. When he wanted a soda, Tameka poured it for him. Then after a really long time, Usher squinted really, really hard and said to himself, “I mean…she’s kinda cute.”
Ladies I ask you, how often have you seen some pug fugly girl with your dream guy? Think about it. While you were shyly flirting from afar, she was making him a turkey sandwich with a half a slice of tomato just the way he likes. It’s just nature. Why is it that little boys always have a crush on the girl next door and not the chick down the block? Accessibility. Hell, Zack Morris always fell in love with some chick in his homeroom class. And we all know that Kelly was never that damn cute. Why? Accessibility. But I digress. I’m not suggesting that you hit on every guy you see. But it wouldn’t hurt to be around…a lot…with a turkey sandwich.
For all of the ladies out there with a less than viable visage…there is hope. I humbly submit, the Tameka Raymond model.
LOL!!!!
” I humbly submit, the Tameka Raymond model.”
She’s actually attractive when you close one eye, jump around on one leg and turn the essence mag to a 45 degree angle and suck on a jolly rancher.
Bwhahahha.
That’s prolly what Usher did to justify getting down on the flo’.
lmao comeback what exactly does the jolly rancher do?
The jolly rancher is bitter sweet. esp the apple one. And its also rather distracting and brings back childhood memories ALL at the same time…
sike Tameka isn’t that bad. She cleans up rather nice. She just has a strong features that COULD remind you of your brother….but Ru Paul looks hella great as a woman…so forget all I said…never mind.
Tameka is a hadsome woman….period…a little makeup…a cute outfit…and a great weave…and VOILA…she’s “cute”ish…I am just glad they had a boy…if it had been a girl…smh…it woulda been a mess…
“Tameka is a handsome woman”
this is the best way to describe her. she definitely could be the 6th man for the new york liberty or something
Tameka is a hadsome woman.
This is never a compliment. I say this ish when I’m being funny…lol
As Panama’s and Capitalist Pig’s theory suggests, she was just always around positioning herself for the right moment. As his stylist, they probably talked and got to know each other on a level where he looked pass her handsome-ness. You gotta understand though, she KNOWS this nigga…been working closely with him for a minute, so she KNEW what she had to do in order to play her cards right.
I’m not gonna really comment on her physical appeal (or lack thereof), but she played the game and caught dude. She probably put her plan into action right after the Chilli thing.
She’s actually attractive when you close one eye, jump around on one leg and turn the essence mag to a 45 degree angle and suck on a jolly rancher.
OMG…I hate you so much right now… I am going to get FIRED!!!!
I don’t really think she’s busted, but compared to women in his past…yeah!!!
I figure she has to be a BEAST in the sack though…
Comeback that shit was funny as the fuc* “stands on one leg…”
Champ u stupid “…6th man for the newyork liberty.” LOL!
i bet Tameka has to shave her hairy ass and file down her knuckles. heh, heh, heh…
usher has a square head so they fit well together.
LOL..true Capitlaist. Proximity counts for a lot.
“Proximity counts for a lot.”
it does.
D@mn…this is a great point.
Accessibility? Accessibility? Accessibility?
Are you saying you would talk to a chick just because she’s there?
Gigi,
No I wouldn’t talk to every lack luster face out there just because she was accessible to me, we all have our standards. 9 times out of 10 I wouldn’t give her the time of day. But let me put it to you this way. Haven’t you ever watched a bad movie on tv just because you couldn’t find the remote control?
Its kinda like that.
LMAO
“No I wouldn’t talk to every lack luster face out there just because she was accessible to me, we all have our standards.”
YOU CAPITALIST PIG!
YOU, YOU FACIST PIG!
i just like hearing that shit.
now if you and that half wit humpback was somewhere private [she closed a door] and you thought you could get away with it would you let her give you a smoothie? you would probably at least find some redeeming qualities at that point while you thought about it. LOL!
“For all of the ladies out there with a less than viable visage…there is hope. I humbly submit, the Tameka Raymond model.”
LMAO! TI and Dwayne Wade are really good looking men with not so attractive women.
Whooooo!!! say that again Leila.
Mud-ducks a plenty!
I understand wbout Dwyane though…she has been with him since the beginning, so he knows she really loves him.
TI doesn’t really have an excuse.
“TI doesn’t really have an excuse.”
to me, this is the oddest black celebrity pairing that i know of.
you know, strange enough Tiny was something of an in-demand chick back in the day b/c i know quite a few cats who dated her, two of my cousin’s included. i think she just gets a lot of light skint points. and she can sing so maybe that helps. there really is otherwise no explanation for her.
but that’s more odd than Jermaine Dupri and Janet Jackson?? i mean she’s janet jackson…not latoya, not rebie…
Tiny can sing?
“i think she just gets a lot of light skint points”
this is another post all by itself.
and, btw, i forgot about janet and jermaine.
“i think she just gets a lot of light skint points”
She gets entirely too much credit if this is what they are basing points off of.
Champ—I don’t think it’s the “oddest one” that I know of, but it’s damn right strange.
Tiny’s cool and I think Tip’s attraction to her goes beyond her looks (obviously). In the times when I’ve ran across her though, she did come across as being very loyal and nurturing type who knows how to take care of her man.
I do think she gets too many “light-skinned” points though.
neither TI nor Dwayne Wade are really good looking men. they got enough change in their pockets to make them finer than they’d otherwise be, but they are not cute.
I have to disagree. I saw Dwayne Wade on Saturday night and he is a very good looking man! Even one of my girls who didn’t think that he was all that said that he looks real good in person. TI’s a good looking man too. Denzel Washington is another good-looking man with an unattractive woman, so I guess charm works for women too….
**St. Mary’s Cathedral**
D Wade is GORGEOUS to me…TV and in person (no the money is NOT a factor). He could get it any day/night of the week…often and repeatedly.
Time out! Pauletta Washington is a pretty woman. She was even prettier when she was younger. Not *trying* to jump to conclusions, but I am tired of Black women talking about Pauletta, Michele Obama or Tameka Raymond when most of our sisters look more like them than the Rihannas and Beyonces we think are sooo beautiful. We get mad when the brothers prefer the light, bright and/or white girls, but then we spend our time dissing the non-mixed looking sisters. When are we satisfied?
I think Pauletta and Michele are pretty.
Tameka—nuh uh.
Color doesn’t have a thang to do with it–at least with me it doesn’t.
Sista Toldja,
In reference towards Pauletta, are you suggesting she should get points just because she’s not light-skinned and doesn’t l0ok more like the “non-mixed looking sisters”?
Michelle Obama is attractive in a Claire Huxtable type way. But Tameka, Not.So.Much. However, as with Tiny, she may have those other qualities that overshadowed what she lacks in the looks department.
No, I am saying she is (IMO) pretty and it’s curious to me that the celeb wives who are constantly berated for not being “pretty” are darker brown with less-European features than the women our people usually celebrate.
Dwayne is a good looking man.
TI–not so much.
CP, i think you’re on to something with the accessability thing. yep and never underestimete a man’s laziness. 9 times out of 10 he will captitalize on the easy route. if a chick willing to serve and protect, we’ll probably let her. however i have seen men take the homely girl that serves and aquire something better looking. (keep homely girl too until he can’t anymore)
personality does get you a couple of cool points though ladies and riding for a man will get you 3 or 4 points.
a really nice shape with just an ok face and a comely, sexy personality trumps that really really pretty fine chick with a put-off personality and non accessible attitude.
on my scrolls you get extra points for nice hair natural or otherwise. (short, long)
in my book you get extra points for having good common sense and being otherwise smart and ambitious.
“A really nice shape with just an ok face and a comely, sexy personality trumps that really really pretty fine chick with a put-off personality and non accessible attitude.”
*Buddist Monk on top of a Himalayan mountain prayin’*
Then after a really long time, Usher squinted really, really hard and said to himself, “I mean…she’s kinda cute.”
this is when you know you’re in trouble…and we’ve all done this – using those exact words. it’s called “making excuses for yourself to date a busted chick”
But is she makes you feel good what’s the problem?
in a perfect world, there wouldn’t be a problem. we all have our own bullshit to get over and most of the time, we’re all standing in the way of our own happiness.
with that said, it’s hard to be happy dating a person who looks like a bottle of welch’s orange juice.
“looks like a bottle of welch’s orange juice.”
i need you to come and pick me up from work cause i just got sent home for the day.
“most of the time, we’re all standing in the way of our own happiness.”
Damn that’s true.
Maybe Plies really meant “Busted Baby” and not Bustee (dp??) Baby….Or am I grasping for straws?
I think he mean ‘buss it’ as in ‘bust it’ as in ‘hit it’ as in ‘smash it’ as in ‘squash it’ as in ‘bang it’ as in ‘fuck it’ baby.
i believe he’s referring to, in addition to what monk mentioned, a girl that can squirt as in female ejaculation. and it makes sense given the lyrics.
ROFL!! All so very true.
Ladies I ask you, how often have you seen some pug fugly girl with your dream guy? Think about it.
I just assume she used to be cute…but after the keep-a-ni99a-baby that she trapped him with she just let herself go…alas…In Dallas, the everyday chicks are built like bell peppers…so when I see T. Raymond syndrome, I always assume that she’s the baby mama…and she MUST swallow…(shrugging)
“but after the keep-a-ni99a-baby that she trapped him with…”
And p.s.- they don’t really work!
LMAO at this! I call them ‘save the marriage babies’
“In Dallas, the everyday chicks are built like bell peppers”
Dear Lord…let me log off right now..
**dead** LOL…now I gotta go and tell the house gym trainer that I NEVER WANT TO LOOK LIKE A apple, an orange, a tomato, corn on the cob, OR A BELL PEPPER.
@ComeBack…you should be fine…I thin there is something in MIC CITY’s water supply that has made the BellPepper body type a genetic thing…cause it’s too many of them in existence for it to be just lack of gym visits!!! this shit is in in the DNA! a FOOL!
“everyday chicks are built like bell peppers”
LMAO!!!!!!
Wow. Now I don’t get up to Dallas too often, but dayum!!!! I’ma keep my arse in the ATX.
@T-lee….nah girl…you got ASS…you need to come up for a visit….you would be a fuggin STAR up here..they don’t get ASS much…you might couldd get a bill paid or something…(joking…kind of)
^^^^
Hmmm…**thinking of future relocation**
I keed, I keed.
“In Dallas, the everyday chicks are built like bell peppers”
**making note to self to never vacation in dallas**
@CHAMP…I’m talking shit…you would never see the everyday Dallas chicks…you would only see teh tourist ready version of the D…lol…there are definitely some banging chicks here…I mean shit… I LIVE HERE…so it can’t be all bad… lm(red)ao
@ GOODENess,
Please never refer to Dallas as ‘the D’. There’s only one ‘the D’…and that would be Detroit.
This is not up for discussion.
Lol! SO true! Tameka is not a good looking woman but she was willing to stick it out through the whole Chilli episode slowly stacking her wardrobe and upgrading the weave! Trust and belive that homegirl had a PLAN!
men really underestimate a woman with a plan! i’ve seen negroes get got time and again over this one.
but who said that Usher was cute? he looks like a Treasure Troll and Tameka looks like a man. come on people. Even when she is fixed up she is ugly. Now USher looks nice when he is fixed up but still a Treasure Troll
utc115 I thought I was alone in that! he is a sexy treasure troll though…this is a prime example of charisma and talent (real and perceived) overshadowing the averageness of a man…if he didnt’ have a stylist, he would still be rocking that grease and water joint he had when he first hit the scene!
but who said that Usher was cute?
On the blogs they call him
Munchichi…bahahha
Usher does still look like a Treasure Troll…or a Mon Chi Chi (funny little cartoon that was). He is in no way sexy to me…since I don’t really go for the troll look myself.
I think she is pretty. Not gorgeous, but pretty. I like her eyes. I don’t think Usher is fine himself, just cute. But they made a CUTE ASS BABY! I like them as a couple, I hope they can make it through all the self-hating mud Black women and men have slung at them,
I hope they can make it too in the same way I hope all happy couples make it.
u r silly…lmbo!
“treasure troll”
hah
“For a man to end up dating an ugly woman, he usually has to know her from the neighborhood and spent a lot of time getting to know her – almost to the point where he has to begin asking himself why NOT date her. We all do it. We find excuses to forego somebody we’re interested in because they look like lamps.”
I agree this can happen, but it’s kinda like viewing an abstract painting. She may not really catch your eye initially, but every time you see her you may notice something you didn’t before (i.e. – wow, she’s really cool!…hey, she likes sports too…hmm, her ass is KINDA phat and the way she’s wearing her hair makes her a little sexy…she could get it!).
But, I do think she would have to have something that the guy finds physically attractive if she is lacking in other departments.
Personally, there are certain physical things that a woman would have to have for me to be physically attracted to her, but she doesn’t have to be an 8, 9 or 10…it’d be nice, but not mandatory.
“But, I do think she would have to have something that the guy finds physically attractive if she is lacking in other departments. ”
this is true. there has to be something, at least one thing where you can be like “well, her ass is kind of fat”
“I agree this can happen, but it’s kinda like viewing an abstract painting.”
My homegirl and I used to call guys “Monets”.
I hadn’t thought about that in years. LOL
Abstract, impressionism…it’s all in there together…
Most attractive chicks feel like they can and should do better than an ugly guy, even if he’s charming and funny. Quite frankly, unattractive chicks feel that way too. So charm can work on a girl, but know that she will feel like she is making a big concession, and you can’t afford to have anything else wrong with you. And charm works better for the ‘unattractive’ guy rather than the ‘ugly’ one.
It’s also all about timing. I know i’ve talked to guys I may not have talked to otherwise simply because they caught me on a good day.
I think girls with a less-cute face will do better if they have a banging body. This doesn’t cover ugly chicks mind you, but a phat ass can help compensate for an unfortunate grill.
ITA with:
“Most attractive chicks feel like they can and should do better than an ugly guy, even if he’s charming and funny.”
and
“So charm can work on a girl, but know that she will feel like she is making a big concession, and you can’t afford to have anything else wrong with you. And charm works better for the ‘unattractive’ guy rather than the ‘ugly’ one. ”
And he WILL have something else wrong with him and you’ll be wondering “what did I SEE in his azz in the first place?!”
*And he WILL have something else wrong with him and you’ll be wondering “what did I SEE in his azz in the first place?!”*
exactly. at least if he’s fine you can console yourself with the fact that he was sexy… lol.
you know, before we continue today, i think we need a working definition of a “6″.
in my mind, 4.5-5 is “average”, so a six is definitely above average, which makes her, on sheer looks alone, definitely datable, and not someone you hafta argue yourself into going out with.
I’m trying to think of that dating percentage from Seinfeld right now…
In theory, I’m with you Champ, that does seem logical. But from a standpoint of practicality I’m not sure your definition would fly. If you’re braggin to your boys about a girl you just met and you describe her as a “6″, you can pretty much bank on the look of disappointment on their faces. Even though by benefit of the scale a “6″ should definitely be above average.
I blame the overuse and diluting of the “10″ rating. It should be a myth like Unicorns or some ish.
“I blame the overuse and diluting of the “10? rating. It should be a myth like Unicorns or some ish.”
for instance, i would consider women like rachel true or kimberly locke to be true 6′s. none of these women are “10′s” (which actually don’t exist) but all are definitely physically attractive and definitely sport able (on looks alone)
wait? Kim Locke is a “6″?? ok…I am going to go log off and jump out the window now…(not really) but damn…I think, I thought, still think, I’m more than a 6…but you ninjas are making me think again…Happy Monday and shit!
damn homie, if Rachel True is a “6″ I don’t even wanna know what your “9″ is…the face of God?
ladies, please join me while we observe a “6″ in the Eyes of one VSB brotha… http://pics.myspaceprofiles.org/31/l/65397031.jpg
(riiiiiiiiight, hey goodie i’ll meet you at the ledge in 5)
Rachel True is a 6? WHAT? WHAAAAAT?
So, where do you rate yourself, sir? Just curious.
two things:
1) the “scale” that i use only goes up to 9. i’ve never seen anybody perfect, so i can’t realistically give anyone a 10. so, my “6″ is the same as most peoples “7″ or “7.5″. (kenya moore, btw, would be a 9, but i doubt that she’s even a human being. i think she was bred in a biology lab)
2) in college, my teammate’s gf (who also was a friend of mine) asked me for her score. even though i lied and gave her a 7, she still found a major issue with that, and for the rest of the school year, whenever anybody would make any reference to her and i was in earshot, i’d hear “yeah, thanks for the compliment. i just bought these shoes last week…but since the champ thinks i’m a 7, i guess i’m just a not cute girl wearing nice shoes”.
point being, i generally run away from this topic, because feelings get hurt and people get all personal, even if theyre the ones who asked for your opinion.
but, to answer your question, sister t, i dont. since my “rating” is completely decided apon the whim of whichever woman is doing the rating, i dont even bother rating myself. i think i’m average looking, but women who have been, ummm, “very above” average have found me attractive before, so who knows.
asking someone to rate themselves is like asking someone whether or not theyre good in bed. you might have an answer, but it really doesnt matter coming from you
I’m with you CP. You just cant be excited about bringing home a 6. in fact, my boys and I, we don’t date 6′s. we bone 6′s. that’s it.
now some of these ninjas have broken that rule, but like i said before…they talked to the chicks and got caught up.
so like don’t look Badu in the eye…don’t actually converse with a 6?
damn…P…you a beast man!
it’s a cold cold world.
what i mean about talking to them is that, if you talk to a chick who’s a 6, chances are she’s actually a good person and in the case of my boys, the 6′s won ‘em over with personality. of course, they never once said they lookeded good so those relationships ended b/c that whole reassurance and shit that chicks like?
out.the.window.
even if you put lipstick on a pig…it’s still just a pig with lipstick on.
DAMMIT!!! Panama Allowishcus Bernard Jackson! I knew what you meant about not actually talking to a 6…lol…but…
even if you put lipstick on a pig…it’s still just a pig with lipstick on.
DAMMIT!!! you are killing me… my NanaB used to say this too…she is one of those old ladies that wouldn’t say a baby was cute if it wasn’t…a fool…lipstick…on a pig?? a pig my ninja?? dayum!
So what do yall men do with the 7s. Do they get a happy meal but with the tinted windows rolled up…and no movie.
You can date a 7. I would and have. In fact, I prefer 7s and 8s since they tend to be girl-next-door type hot chicks who are more down to earth.
they also look good without makeup on.
i’m witya on the no make-up test. i think that’s what yung berg’s “better coming out than in the pool test” is about. i like to know home girl looks good stripped all the way down to nothin. yep and the 7′s and 8′s (facewise, naturally) tend to be cooler chix than the 9′s and dimes.(facewise) i like to couple this 7 &8 face with a proportianate or voloptuous body 7 3/4 and up body. personal observation.
wit all this paint, spackle, primer, putty, facade’s, drywall and shit you see a whole nother person than what’s underneath the siding.
throw a frisbee and if she can’t resist running after it, you got you a mut. LOL!
I hear this alot….the last dude that got fired from GOODENPLENTY producitons said his favorite thing about me was my real ness…and that I “look just like myself” first thing in the morning…LOL
GK Man
**walking down the streets beating myself w/ a cat of nine tails and a 8″ crown of thorns**
GK Man
**walking down the streets beating myself w/ a cat of nine tails and a 8″ crown of thorns while carying a cross**
Thank you Champ…cause I was just coming in to define what MY idea of a “6″ is. If 5 is average, and 6 is above average, then most people shouldn’t have a problem with a 6. To me, 6 for a woman, is…she ain’t supermodel hot, but she looks a lot better than the average chick on her worst day. For a man, 6 is…he’s decent, you might walk past him on the street if he’s a bit lacking with the swag, but if he stepped to you and seemed like he was on the level, you’d definitely give him a chance. Anything above a 6, really, is icing on the cake…nice to have, but definitely not mandatory.
I think a more appropriate scale would be that of a percentage…one may get a 0 – 100% as oppose to 1 – 10. As a result, we’ll be able to break things down more deeply and access other qualities that may be given extra credit but at a degree more accurate than just giving a point for that or a point for this.
We can also break down percentages based on things that are important to us based on our preferences. For example, in the looks department, one may be eligible for 50% points. Personality, another 25%…Intelligence and Wisdom, 15%…Sense of Humor, 10% (or however you wanna do your break down).
One would be eligible for extra credit points for other shyt they bring to the table such as being a mix between Emeril and G.Garvin in the kitchen, Martha Stewart and a hardworking Mexican housekeeper at the crib, and Janet Jacme and Vanessa Del Rio in the sack.
Damn, after typing that, why do I have a strange desire to watch “Weird Science”??
lol great topic…
i actually have more lamps in my past than i would like (and let me tell you my coworkers always ask whats wrong when i start cracking up over you guys saying someone looks like a lamp or a telephone) but they were all guys i had so much fun with. a pretty face is fun to look at, i guess, but if he is a jerk why would you stick around? i kinda find charm to be the dealbreaker. thats not to say that i date diseased looking creatures (that just doesnt speak to my fertility) but i date men who are clean and healthy looking at least.
also, i agree with looks being in the eye of the beholder. there are many people who think i’m funny looking in a good way and there are a number or people who think im– dare i say it– beautiful. either way they all think im charming and thats usually what keeps me alive, lol.
Ya know … I have to disagree on one minor point.
If said ugly chick has a big ole fat arse, like set a drink on arse … men will look past the busted facial region. Unless, of course her face looks more like a crime scene than an actual face.
But yeah … I can be charmed. I actually LIKE being charmed.
Yeah, Cheryl, I agree…seen this instance on MANY an occasion.
I’ve witnessed it in action from my brother Rob.
Rob: “Damn LOOK AT HER!”
Me: “ooh Rob she is not cute.”
Rob: “whose lookin at her face? LOOK AT THAT ASS! Bend her over you don’t see her face.”
Me: “yeah thats not a face I can forget real easily”
Rob: “thats because you dont have a d*ck.”
Yes, my brother is a pig. To all women but his own relatives.
Wow! I would slap the s*** outta my brother if he said some mess like that to me! And then I’d tell my Mama so she could slap him too.
Oh. Ok.
Brother should definitely look at other things but is he deserving of a slap? No.
on a personal level, i disagree with your disagreeance.
you’re talking about a tip drill basically. and my momma raised me better than to date a tip drill.
I’m glad she did. However … some of these men walking around – their momma is a tip drill. They learned it at home in that case.
some of these men walking around – their momma is a tip drill.
now THAT’s some shit I gotta remember for the next time I shoot the dozens with my homeboy…
“However … some of these men walking around – their momma is a tip drill. They learned it at home in that case”
ice cold!!!
LMAO. this might be the best retort i’ve actually ever heard in life.
kudos.
*curtsies*
OMG!! This whole article made me laugh out loud at work! Too much, LOL.
There’s 2 or 3 girls I spent alot of time around and unintentionally wound up sort of “peeping,” even though I would never have approached them under more conventional dating-game type circumstances. But I was too young and immature to just own up to teh fact that I felt something for them. I think about that and get salty all the time.
Sometimes I really resent our natures as men to be drawn mostly to outwardly attractive women. It’s a burden and a shackle that prevents alot of us from finding happiness.
Sometimes I really resent our natures as men to be drawn mostly to outwardly attractive women. It’s a burden and a shackle that prevents alot of us from finding happiness.
Scipio Africanus (that name is as pleasing to speak as it is to read…smh) I gotta say…I am proud of you for admitting this shit…would be proud to death, it the thought process that you alluded to as a “shackle” could be shed…but I know better…and, real talk, we talk all this enlightened bull…but women are guilty of it too…
Scipio Africanus,
I feel you bruh. I know that I’ve passed on many of good women because I was chasing the most attractive, but hey, you live and you learn.
Not saying that I’m trying to date a physically-repulsive chick now, but I do appreciate more qualities when choosing who I date.
Great Point.
there is exactly one frog in my dating resume. and that doesn’t count because i was 14.
i’ve dated some average-looking dudes, but i don’t do ugly. hell, i don’t even do fine but under 5’9″. not even for a free meal. damn that charming mess.
if i’m going to put myself through the drama of dating and possibly a relationship and break-up, i need to be able to say “well at least he was sexy” at the end of it.
“Most attractive chicks feel like they can and should do better than an ugly guy, even if he’s charming and funny.”
Most but certainly not all. I personally feel that a man has to bring a heck of a lot more to the table than a pretty smile and the potential for cute babies. Bring some personality, some charm, some $! A cute face aint gonna cut it when the bills are due!
I agree with Champ….from reading the comments every woman wants to know where they stand in the number game…so it’s time…time for the official VSB “Number Generator”!
Just submit a recent “Non-PhotoShop enhanced” picture and some basic information…income, sexual preferences, degrees and bamn you get your number. But even better you get a number with advice on how to move up. For example:
“You’re a 4! Don’t be dismayed, you can move up 2 points by increasing your workout regimine and head game. Success is in your future!”
or
“You’re an 8! Congratulations…not only could you get it, right now…but here’s my cell, call me when you land!”
LOL…I love VSB!
Lol! I think all regular commentors start off with at least a 5, just because they have a good sense of humor and obviously enough intelligence to know where to find a smart relationship forum!
@Dom…we shouldn’t get a bonus for having sense…because the system is to evaluate initial bad-girl-ability…not the non-physical shit that makes us doper than your average…ya dig?
Kamilah
YOU ARE A GENIUS!!! this would be DOPE!! and I would for damn sure sign up for that there….BUT it wouldn’t be a fair evalutation…because they KNOW us already and (hopefully) think we’re charming…lol…
Submit the pictures anonymously.
And shouldnt the guys face the same ranking process.
Oh, oh…thanks for the compliment! They know us a little bit, but from what I’ve heard brothas can remain objective…lol!
“I agree with Champ….from reading the comments every woman wants to know where they stand in the number game…so it’s time…time for the official VSB “Number Generator”!”
this is great in theory, but panama and i plan on actually getting more visitors, not getting more hate mail.
this is a subject that is a complete no-win for all parties involved. trust me
I plesantly disagree…it’s beneficial all around….and you can’t send hate mail for something you know you signed-up for. Besides the viral press would be all over this….you can even have guest panelists….see the vision!
Knowledge is power…lol!
“Knowledge is power…lol!”
yeah, but this knowledge is like giving a nuclear warhead to a 6 year old.
panama’s actually written a roughly 300,000 word entry before about why a woman should never, ever, ever, ever ask a guy her “score”.
lol…again though, good idea in theory, but this is one thing vsb.com will never, ever touch
Champ,
Is it that most men lie to a woman’s face when giving her a ranking? I would really like to know. I have always been given an average of about a 7.5, which I am comfortable with. But if you are telling me I get a an extra 2 pts, because the dude doing the ranking knows me and knows what an all around spectacular personality I then I have a problem with being a 5.5. Averge Sucks
“Is it that most men lie to a woman’s face when giving her a ranking?”
change that “most” to “all” and you’re right on the money
Got damnit…I am a 5…
Naw, i am too damn cute and fan-fucking-tabulous to be a five. I’m a 7(at least)
Ok…I’m starting to see your logic. Plus I’m not a fan of nuclear warheads…his head *sigh*
, nuclear warheads not so much. But maybe a blog laying out the attributes of each number would work…then it’s up to the legions of adoring VSB.com fans to self-interpret…giggles! 
“But maybe a blog laying out the attributes of each number would work…then it’s up to the legions of adoring VSB.com fans to self-interpret…giggles!”
i actually did this on my old site before. if i still had it up i’d link you to it.
again though, even that is tricky.
link?
I agree CHAMP…no good can from it…but the premise amused me…I mean if/when we have the VSB Family reunion/talent show…there will be smoke in the city if ya’ll say we’re like 4′s and shit…but a panel could make it work…and the patriarchs of the VSB family will emerge unscathed…and since I am of the impression that you both have girlfriends, you won’t have to explain why you are judging your e-friend’s fuck-ability…everyone wins…cuz if we ask for it…it’s on us…
to quote Kamilah…see the vision…
**disclaimer – I am SO kidding on this shit…I am conviced that I am the bomb…and I am would like to keep my esteem in tact!!! thanks!
and lets not forget that one mans 3 could be another mans 9…
I second that disclaimer (high-five to GOODENess)…we couldn’t help ourselves, had to bring the sarcasm back…plus it makes for a good work break…and since GOODENess just decided to chair the reunion committee I think we’re back on track!
Esteem quite in tact…and oddly enough quite unshakable…who knew…lol!
“I am conviced that I am the bomb…and I am would like to keep my esteem in tact!!!”
basically … LOL. i’m an 8.5 dammit. you can’t tell me i’m not. and if you did i wouldn’t believe you. i might even punch you in the throat for saying so.
this is a subject that is a complete no-win for all parties involved. trust me
You’re right.
This is up here with asking your girl/guy what their “number is”
NGCCOT
(no good can come of this.)
I posted this earlier and wanted some comments on it. Did it not post because I had the links in? anyway holla @ ya girl. I can’t believe that women took this so lightly.
Women can be charmed; I have been charmed. I actually perfer a man’s charm over his looks. I would much rather be with someone who made me laugh over someone that everyone thought was a very good looking. Personality is so important to me and being able to hold a good conversation is mandatory. It’s easy to help a brother find better clothes, get a nice hair cut and shave properly. But if he’s dumb as rocks there is nothing that can be done. If he is as interesting as a wet napkin there is nothing you can do. Is this woman logic?
So where does that leave all the average women? Single and lonley? I don’t think that’s the case. I think that like Fulanigirl said attraction is realative. There is someone out there for everyone. Mo’nique is married and we all know how most of the men on this board feel about her looks.
I think all this attention on a women’s physical appearance can make men seem shallow. Just recently Young Berg said that he didn’t do dark women. He said that he just didn’t like dark booty. He also said that he has a pool test. He only dates women who look sexier coming out of the pool then when they went in. Is this how most brothas feel?
“Just recently Young Berg said that he didn’t do dark women. He said that he just didn’t like dark booty. He also said that he has a pool test. He only dates women who look sexier coming out of the pool then when they went in. Is this how most brothas feel?”
no…this is just how most grown-ass men with a “young” prefix accompanying their name feel.
YUNG BERG!!! The fact that he can’t even spell “young” should mean his ass shouldn’t be lumped in with VSB’s!
its his preference so………!! He’s pretty jacked anyway so no one’s missing out on him or his lack of income!!
some folks seem to get their esteem from the media. So the minute someone says or does something they feel invalidates them they get upset.
Nut, not all brothas feel the way he does.
Clearly not all men feel this way, and i’d venture to say most do not, but there are definitely some that do. Being color struck is not a figment of our imaginations or something that died in the 70′s/80′s. Most people just wouldn’t say the ish out loud in mixed company.
Personally, i’d rather know what i’m dealing with up front…
“grown-ass men” and “young prefixes” are mutually exclusive. the presence of the latter automatically negates the former.
::applause::
“Just recently Young Berg said that he didn’t do dark women. He said that he just didn’t like dark booty. He also said that he has a pool test. He only dates women who look sexier coming out of the pool then when they went in”
Yung Berg looks like a mongoose.
His opinion is null and void.
Yeah, but his attitude is common. Not necessarily about dark women (well, it is somewhat common). But just the fact that he is an ugly man who thinks he deserves a “hot” woman.
When single, I established the following criteria for giving a less than beautiful woman the time of day:
1) fat @ss (a donkey kong can upgrade just about any woman)
2.) tremendous rack (not quite a fatty, but can definitely provide a strong argument for why a mediocre woman should be given a chance)
3.) If over 5’8″ tall, must be a dime, body of a goddess… a rhodes scholar…and an Iron Chef winner.
4.) Fashionable as f*ck on some over-compensation sh*t (ie mean shoe game, glasses, bag, jeans etc)
5.) X-factor. Although she is not beautiful, she somehow is s*xy as hell.
“If over 5?8? tall, must be a dime, body of a goddess… a rhodes scholar…and an Iron Chef winner.”
does that mean you’re short?
No…I’m 6’6″…I just like short women. Not that tall women aren’t beautiful and all…it’s just that for me, the requirements get much more strict as the height increases.
D*boy…OMG…ummmm….how…come…all…I ….read…was… 6’6? the rest of that comment just blurred into black lines of meaningless text…(like that webdings font) 6’6?? six(muhfuggin)six? lawd-ha-mursee-jeezus!!
LMAO! You are silly.
I thought you knew that.
@D*boy…I may have known that…but I must have forgotten…cuz..ummmmm….yeh…what was I saying???…right…married…nevermind…CTFU
Hmm. So, judging by your standards, you must be drop the fuck dead goregous. Got a pic?
“you must be drop the fuck dead goregous”
LMAO!!!! No, unfortunately I’m not drop dead gorgeous. I honestly don’t know how I would rank.
I just have always had high standards. And it has always worked out for me. Ultimately, I ended up with a woman who is a gorgeous, brown skinned, 28 yr old, who is finishing her Doctoral dissertation in English from Columbia University.
All I have is a Bachelor’s from St John’s University, mediocre credit and a decent job. She is smarter and waaaay better looking than me. I think I’m pretty much just lucky as f*ck.
‘I think I’m pretty much just lucky as f*ck.”
my sentiments exactly. sometimes i think about some of the women i’ve been with and i think “yo…how the hell did i pull that off?”. i’m literally befuddled.
spellbound
awestruck
Lol! At least you can admit this! You must have high self-confidence as well.
I think what while we’ve been debating about charm its actually self-confidence that makes not so attractive men score with women that are “out of their league.”
@Champ and Dom,
I definitely feel you guys…I mean c’mon, why would we really want to be with women in our so called “league?” F**k that! The thing about it is once you’ve been with one dime…there’s no going back! I remember when I first got into college and i started dating college chicks. My ex-girl from H.S tried to get back into the rotation. I had to tell her straight-up…”You’re just not my type anymore.” I think I went on to explain to her that “thickness” had become a new requirement for me. HAAAAAAA!
D*stroy….is your Columbia boo named Keisha? Born in July?
@Small World…Nah, her name is definitely not Keisha. But they probably know eachother cause there are only like 2.5 black folks in the entire program.
That’s interesting, i’ve usually found the height thing goes the other way. Which is good for me cause i’m taller than 5’8″
Most of my friends only date tall women. Women of “model height.” I just had a bad experience when I was younger with a tall chick and it turned me off. We were laying around in my dorm room on my twin bed and her legs seemed like they were everywhere. It was like we were competing for space and I
began feeling claustrophobic (literally). Sh*t f-ed me up. Sounds dumb, I know… but it scarred me for life.
LMAO!!! i’m mad at your claustrophobia but can’t really disagree though…two tall people in an ‘extra long’ twin college dorm bed is never a good look!
One guy in school was like 6’3″. I enjoyed his company, but when it came time to actually sleep, he had to roll the hell out!
I haven’t dated any men who I would consider unattractive. When all was said and DONE, I may be unattracted to them. But I thought they were all cute before we swung any epps. I’m sorry, but I don’t get down with men I don’t find cute. I don’t have any pretentious, self-important numerical system. I either feel it or I don’t. If a man steps to me and I don’t find him attractive, he has about 2 seconds to do some real grandiose shit to change my mind, because I am already looking at the front door.
It has been my experience that men who look like who, what and fucking WHY are running around thinking that they are meant to be with dimes and dimes only. This tickles me. However, as a pretty woman and a woman who spends a lot of time in the gym (I’m not there YET physically, but I busted my arse to lose a ton of weight and I will be killing all you hoes at HU’s homecoming), I’m not settling. I’m not stank about it, but if I can’t see myself wanting to kiss you….you aren’t getting the digits.
“It has been my experience that men who look like who, what and fucking WHY are running around thinking that they are meant to be with dimes and dimes only.”
Hell yeah…I knew I wasn’t the only one who noticed this. It’s absolutely comical…I have watched FUGLY men walk right past a decent looking chick to talk to the so-called “hot” one…and they will accept nothing less. I’m like, dude, WTF…stay on your level!
Okay so it’s not just me. I’ve been approached by Dudes and I’m thinking, “What the hell makes u think I’m gonna talk to you.”
I’m with u Toldja – I’m a pretty girl stacked to the hilt, so why should I not have a hot dude. I spend an awful lot of time in the gym and I like hot bodies.
And once you’ve been with a well built man, there’s no going back. There’s just not. I like hard bodies. I like smart men. I like handsome faces. And there you have it.
I can make a room go silent when I walk in so I want the same for my dude. Just sayin.’
Preach! …but from a woman’s perspective…cause I’m a dude…so when I say “preach,” I mean if you were a man talking about women, I would really feel what you are saying! So, everything you were saying about hard bodies, smart men, and handsome faces…convert that to more efeminite sh*t and that’s how I feel too! Oh never mind. I just like hot chicks.
The man had his big rusty foot on my neck all the live-long day! Sheesh.
It’s not charming that gets the swamp donkey the prize. It’s shameless persistence!!! Once we women figure this out, we can develop a proper force field. I didn’t always have a bubble around me. Man I’ll tell you, there was this one dude I messed with for nearly a decade–of an on. On day, as he was at the high point of his assholery, I looked at him and thought, “Da fug am I don’t with his fugly ass?” Spell was broken. I realized the only reason he got me, and got me good, was that he was focused and kept adjusting his game until he found the right way to pitch to me. Bastard!
LOL @ Hostess. There is truth to that. Once u realize it however u are MORE than prepared for such tactics. LOL.