Can White Folks Also Be N*ggas In Paris?

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You know she's Jay's n*gga!

[**PJ 754am EDIT: Seeing as I wrote this post waiting for the site to get back up, I just let it ride without really thinking much of it, which makes me feel extremely bad for NOT coming back to write that TODAY IS LIZ'S BIRTHDAY!!! Everybody please with the 1st Lady of VSB a Very Happy Birthday today!!! **]

By now, most of the Ninjerati is aware that Gwyneth Paltrow tweeted that it’s “N***as in paris for real” from the Watch The Throne concernt in Paris over the past weekend. The-Dream, owner of the most unnecessary m-dash in history, attempted to stem the tide by claiming that he tweeted from Gwyneth’s phone.

As if!

However, apparently some colored got their panties in a bunch. Or at least that’s what I suppose happened. I honestly couldn’t care less. In fact, that story is such a non-starter to me because it doesn’t mean anything in the grand scheme of things. It doesn’t mean anything grand for society and it for damn sure didn’t set the Black community back hundreds of years. Naw, we do that plenty by ourselves every day on Twitter. But while being chided by a commenter on Monday’s post for wasting space on issues like zombies (a very real issue in my mind, up there with the re-election) and Champ’s “most embarassing moments ever” post, as opposed to issues like Paltrow’s misguided use of the loaded n-word I got to thinking. By the way, if in any way, shape, or form, you truly believe that Gwyneth using the n-word constitutes a black issue worthy of full discourse…

…stop it.

Moving on. Celebrities and white folks use of the n-word is a curious one enough by itself. Granted, we’ve had issues with television personalities (perhaps rightly) using irony as a weapon against us by wondering aloud why we can refer to ourselves with such language but the second a white person does it becomes an issue. And that’s actually a fair point. Hell, be honest here, that’s what Gwyneth was doing. There’s no doubt in my mind that she tweeted during their umpteenth rendition of “N*ggas In Paris” the song named by Kanye West as his was of not giving a f*ck. Jay apparently wanted to call it “Ball So Hard” but Kanye wanted the song to truly be on that n*gga sh*t. If that’s his wish. It’s what he got. Anyway her tweet leads me to my thoughts…are there any times where it is actually okay for white folks to use the n-word.

The answer is “yes”. It’s just not…suggested. Or recommended. But what are those times?

1. When it’s in the title of a song or album

See, “N*ggas in Paris”. Sure they could call the song “Paris” like radio stations were doing, but it sounds stupid. The song is called “N*ggas In Paris” and it should be respected as such. Calling it “N-Words In Paris” doesn’t sound right, nor does “Paris”. I’ve long contended that N.W.A. created the most ingenious album title ever with EFIL4ZAGGIN by spelling N*GGAZ4LIFE backwards, ensuring that white people could say the name of the album without feeling guilt. That’s why Dr. Dre is a gazillionaire and you are not.

2. In a court of law in reference to a quote

Hey white folks, if you’re on the stand and are asked to repeat what you heard, and the n-word is part of what you heard, you. better. work. Say it. Hell, it may be the ONLY time in your life you get to know what it feels like to be Paul Mooney. Take advantage. (Okay, so I am suggesting AND recommending it in this case). Granted, everybody is going to be listening extra hard to see how excited you are to use the phrase but still. For sympathy points you may want to cry a little to makes the joy. Nobody likes a show off.

3. In a quote from a rap lyric

Hmm, this is just like #1. I’m slow. I don’t reed gud. However, if we believe that rap is art and that artists don’t like their work being altered or deconstrcuted improperly, it stands to reason that you should respect and mimic such art in its true unaltered form. Therefore, when reciting said lyrics, you should recite the words verbatim. Unless, you are in an urban area or the Blacks outnumber you. Not sure what would happen if a white person did this in front of a bunch of white Latinos who will unironically use the n-word as well. My head hurts. Let’s move on.

4. When doing a public reading of a Black literature book

Why this would ever happen is beyond me. But let’s say that it did happen. If the reader DIDN’T read the words out loud or skipped them or changed them it would be like watcing Friday on USA or TNT. You know how words like “motherf*cker” turn into “mothertrucker” or something equally stupid. Well, yeah, that would suck. Much like Black literature books. But should a white person ever find themselves reading one, they’d have my blessing to read it as it is. Outloud.

Hmm. It seems like the only time its ever okay is while performing some sort of mimicry.

That sounds hypocritical. But hey, I didn’t make the rules.

So, what say you? Are these okay times for a white person to use the n-word? What are others? Let’s help them out (which would totally NOT be helping them out, irony thy name is bittersweet…actually its irony).

(And actually “yes” truly means no. There’s never a time where it’s truly okay. Bet that up.)

-VSB P aka THE ARSONIST aka MR. PARROT THAT N*GGA SH*T aka GIIIIIIIIIRL HE A 3

492 thoughts on “Can White Folks Also Be N*ggas In Paris?”

  1. I don’t mind a white person saying it as a quote or something but don’t call me (personally) no ni66a. I will threaten you physically.

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    • #1,2&4 yes
      #3 no

      Just recently my boyfriend was reading to me, aloud, passages from a book called Black Like Me. Whenever there was the N-word he would say “N-word” in lieu of the N-word. It made the reading awkward but I would rather that type of awkwardness than the awkwardness of him saying the actual word. When I read the book aloud, I said the full word because it was in the context of literature.

      I am against the recreational use of the word by anyone regardless of ethnicity. Gwenyth’s use was recreational and therefore wrong. She did not simply quote the song.

      No one should use the word, especially black people. Seriously people need to have some type of integrity.

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      • “It made the reading awkward but I would rather that type of awkwardness than the awkwardness of him saying the actual word. When I read the book aloud, I said the full word because it was in the context of literature.”

        So… When you read it in the context of literature, it’s fine to say the full word. When he reads it in the context of literature you prefer that he doesn’t say the actual word because it would be too awkward? Color me confused by your logic.

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        • You totally missed the point of the story which is (and has nothing to do with what I prefer):
          I read the word, which is not in my everyday vocab, bc I saw it as literature. He didn’t read the actual word bc of his respect for me and he would have felt extremely awkward if he said the word. He figured it was better not to say the word to avoid potential conflict, although there would not have been conflict. He made a choice to err on the side of caution; I didn’t force him to say one word or the other.

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  2. CELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLTICCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

    I AM FIRST, TOO!

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  5. 2 terms that I can’t stand, being said by ANYONE of any color: “white folks” & “niggas” So over this topic. It’s a song title. That a black man chose to use. Enough said.

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      • as long as “certain” people can’t use ANY version nothing has changed-AND its make “us” look dumb for trying to use to sound cool-sh*tz stoooopid.

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  6. This is part of the reason I didn’t like that song; it give people who aren’t necessarily malicious the feeling that they can say the n-word and not offend people. Granted, you don’t have the right to be in offended and this is a non….factor. All that being said, I’ve told my 2520 friends I don’t care who gave them a pass, not to use it around me.

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  7. 2 and 3.

    Although I have to say that I’ve seen some comedy specials (from comedians who insult everyone regardless of color or ethnicity) and I didn’t cringe or want to become Tommy “the Hitman” Hearns after hearing them say that word.

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  8. Like I said earlier the “N” word is not a word I like or use much except to describe an ignorant person regardless of color. And I usually hate to see/hear other people use it. I basically treat it like a swear word. A really bad one.

    My feeling on 2520s using it? “We” can’t really get mad when “we” have made “them” comfortable to use the word casually in conversation. That’s hypocritical bullsht imo. Don’t like being called a nigg@? Stop calling yourself one first. Stop saying it around people “unworthy” of using it themselves. It’s a start, no?

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  10. Jammy Jams,

    CELTICS WON!

    On to matters of lesser importance, as it pertains to my giddy state right now:

    A white person using the n-word, which I detest, will be SHUT ALL THE WAY DOWN! Yes, I do NOT play with the use of that word! It has been used against me, not just historically BUT in person and I cannot tell you, how degraded I felt! Oh mi gosh! Tears STUNG me! First incident, I was crossing a street, when a bunch of fellow white students slowed their car down and called me the n-word! My God! My blood curled, but there was nothing, absolutely NOTHING I could do BUT take it all in, and hold my head high. They sped off……after the fact!! I was left to taste the visceral candor, and bile with which they spewed and hurled that term at me! Clearly, I’m still yet to recover.

    Second incident, my college (don’t ask for the name, neither location!) had to be shut down for an entire day, and state police had to monitor the situation for quite some time, thereafter because we were under the threat of KKK! There were text messages circulating talking about how if any, [insert THAT word-ya'll liberally use] student stepped on campus, we were going to be eliminated. This was NOT a joke. Shit hit the roof! For a good one month, we held town hall style meetings to diffuse the situation, because we were going to go public with what was happening at the time.

    Third incident, I was helping this old white man at a nursing home that I was volunteering at, when he called me the n-word. It stung. It really hurt. There is nothing really, I could do. He had alzehemeir. He forgot EVERYTHING else in his life but the n-word, and yet it is a term that continues to be used liberally.

    Lastly, when I was in the motherland last year, a friend of mine jokingly used the n-word, I CRINGED! He thinks that all African Americans are insert THAT word. And no, it is not a good look.

    In sum, the continual use of the n-word and the normalization of this process is completely befuddling to me. The “intellectualization” of it, through debasing the age old argument of its place in history and encouraging folks, especially the white folks to use it by stating that so long as they don’t call me a “ger”, instead they call me a “ga”, is CRAZY! Personally, it is unbecoming and irresponsible. That term was not originally used to praise the essence of your existence, it was used to desecrate and emotionally butcher your very being.

    This is a sensitive issue to me….the day my daughter uses that term, is the day my hand and her face will become one, and she will be shipped with promptness to the motherland! No questions asked.

    No person should use that word. PERIOD.————->in my humble opinion!

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    • “Third incident, I was helping this old white man at a nursing home that I was volunteering at, when he called me the n-word. It stung. It really hurt. There is nothing really, I could do.”

      Yes it was- you should have whipped his ass!

      “He had alzehemeir. He forgot EVERYTHING else in his life but the n-word, and yet it is a term that continues to be used liberally.”

      You’re making excuses, African Mami. I don’t care if he had Alzheimer’s or not, you still could have smacked him one good time.

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    • I’ve encountered the KKK a couple times. Once as a kid. They held some type of rally in the middle of town in full costume. Again recently when I went to a festival (some country sh*t in the middle of nowhere) as a vendor. The vendor next to me was not only selling merchandise adorned with confederate flags, but had some of his friends dressed in all white come visit him (all white everything). I can’t tell you what they called me behind my back but they were, surprisingly, cordial and helpful the whole time.

      I would have given that old make the scratchiest blanket I could find.

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    • @ mami- you know i worked with people with traumatic brain injuries. i’d get white clients that would call me nigga at the drop of a dime. i’d usually comment that ” black people call each other nigga so that doesn’t bother me, do better!”

      i would then proceed to tell him ” at least i can walk and don’t shit myself mutha fugga!” oh and the reaction i would get from them would make my nipples hard just a little.

      you see a**holes like to use that word to hurt us because they know that it can.
      i’ve had dudes call me a nigga, but instead of getting bent outta shape i would smile and make some derogatory comment about defiling their mothers which would piss them off far more than them callin me a nigga.

      i understand the history, but we must understand, that no matter how many times the NAACP holds mock funerals the word is not going anywhere. when the day comes where that word no longer bothers us. 2520′s will no longer long to use it

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      • a mock funeral won’t kill what we continue to perpetuate: black on black crime, seeding multitudes of children w/o a care and various other things that make us appear to have lost-links, literally. Many in the community continue hurting our cycle of generations to come and when asking pointedly WTF?! the answer is always the Kanye-shrug. For some damn reason we are our own, and most effective, genocide-have been for years…i have seen parents work harder for a handout than they will for their child’s education and then proceed to get a $400 weave

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  12. I’m a strong believer in that words only hold as much power as you give it. This is why the word “n*gga” is the go-to phrase white people say when they want to make a black person angry. Because of how the vast majority of black people (and I’m sure I will see VSBers echo this sentiment) react when asked what they would do if a white person walked up to them and called them “n*gga”. I’m pretty sure the answer would include some sort of violence either verbally or physically, or both.

    Personally, I don’t care. The word isn’t going to get a reaction out of me. I can’t tell you how many times I made a white person who called me a “n*gga” look stupid by simply not getting angry. I’d smile and say something like, “Enjoy your day bro,” and walk away. And if the incident was witnessed by other white people, they’d walk up to me afterwards and apologize for the guy’s behavior and compliment the way I handled the situation. It just doesn’t bother me. I let my white, asian, and hispanic friends say it all the time.

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    • @ TUK

      aiyaiyaiyai Between being called a booty scratcher and that word. iCant, my tolerance is low. I can’t smile. I just can’t walk away……if I don’t have to.

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    • “I’m a strong believer in that words only hold as much power as you give it. ”

      To not give something power, you must ignore it. The tricky part to that is it becomes commonplace. Hence, what we see today.

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      • It either becomes commonplace or it fades into obscurity. Usually the latter. If black people really get this up in arms over a word because of its history, then maybe we need to stop referring to ourselves as “black” people. Look up the etymology of “black” and what it signifies to a lot of countries on this planet.

        “Black” is almost universally associated with dirtiness, evil, unpurity, anger, negativity, rage, bad, darkness, etc. While white is seen as the exact opposite. In both fiction and non-fiction. “The Darkside”, “Black/Dark Humor”, “Yin/Yang”, etc are examples where black/darkness is a negative thing. Unlike the word “n*gga” which is a Euro-only type deal, “Black” seems to be negative EVERYWHERE. If any word should offend us, it should be that one.

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        • @ TUK,

          Are you serious?! You are making a case for the usage of the n-word, and making comparisons to the term black?! Nah, it must be that I am high on the Celtic win…..imma need you to be serious.

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          • I’m not justifying anything. As I said, sticks and stones. I’m just pointing out how much of a waste of time it is to get seriously worked up over a word. There are bigger problems on this planet to worry about. And yes, I’m fully aware of how “n*gga” was used to dehumanize us and yada yada. But, so was the word “black”. More straightfowardly, so was the word “monkey”.

            What I’m saying is, not only was “black” used to dehumanize just as “n*gga” was, the word “black” is also a more sinister word. It represents everything negative to a large percentage of Earth’s population. If you’re gonna complain about “n*gga” you might as well throw the much worse “black” in there as well.

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            • It is NOT a waste of time. Can you please read, Jay’s response, as mine is pending in moderation. And NO, I am not buying your black vs n-word argument, not for a minute!

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              • I’ve read Jay’s comment and my point still stands. If people choose to let the word bother them, that’s on them. Not me. And no offense to you, but it seems like a self-esteem problem to me. To let a word affect you THAT much. I mean, YOU know who and what you are! Right?! So why the F*CK are you going to let some insensitive, pathetic excuse for a carbon based life form make you feel bad?! Over a word?! Ugh!!! Seriously!?!?

                Because at the end of the day, arguing about who should/shouldn’t have dominion over a word takes a backseat to crime, our laughable education system, our horrendously flawed justice system, our failing economy, joblessness, homelessness, and the myriad of other problems this country and this planet has. In the grand scope of things, an offensive word, just seems so miniscule!

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            • I think one of the fundamental differences between “black” and “nigga” is that “Black” became empowering during the 60′s & 70′s. Literally, during the Black Power Movement, Blacks made a collective effort to appropriate the word and transform its meaning. To this day, despite “ni**a” being used extremely liberally, it’s never held the connotation of “black.” I’ve never seen a “Ni**a is beautiful” t-shirt or seen this word branded (outside of cds) in a fashion that elevates our community.

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            • I 100% agree with T.U.K. I promise you this with all certainty…. we will NEVER EVER eradicate that word. It will NEVER go away. EVER. Its already taboo which is why young people use it… its taboo gives them power. The power of not giving a f*ck. And when people say that its not a term of endearnment, I call bullsh*t. It is a term of endearnment. Words mean nothing. They are sounds that convey emotion. The sound itself means absolutely nothing. We are animals. Its like when dogs bark, the sounds mean NOTHING, its what they convey that matters. You can’t disqualify GENUINE human emotion when I say to a loved one “What up my n*gga”. I convey warmth and comfort to him. When he hears it he thinks not of slavery or whips or chains or none of that. He feels welcome and thats all that matters. I do say it unashamedly but I am conscientious about who I say it around. I wouldn’t necessarily say it around an older person because they aren’t as far removed from the negative connotations of the word as I am. I will respect that. If asked to not say it because it makes someone uncomfortable I will refrain. But to just erase it from my vocabulary because of its history… I say f*ck that. Words evolve. ALL words evolve. There are other terms that we use on a day to day basis that were used at other times to oppress. Black for instance… aaaaand we’ve come full circle

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              • @Jay

                While I understand your argument that words are “technically” empty, I disagree with you on that they don’t have meaning. Words definitely have meaning. Sure, meaning transforms over time, which we give assignment to, but just because they’re “words” doesn’t mean they don’t have an effect. Words can be extremely disrespectful, and used as a mechanism to control and subordinate. As a matter of fact, words can alter the course of lives. For example, take a child who has grown up in a home where love was expressed verbally, and one who was in a home where the sentiment was never uttered. This can have a drastic effect on the way this child grows up and views the world. Something as significant as having the words “I love you” repeated over and over can have a lasting impact on someone’s ability to socially interact with others. Don’t get me wrong, physical contact is just as integral as verbal communication, but let us not fail to see the importance of words and how the can alter lives for better or worse.

                I think I got on a tangent (I was a comm. major so words were pretty huge to me at one point), but I do agree that N*gga will always be in existence. It’s perpetual usage is enduring.

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              • I have to disagree. Words absolutely have meaning. If there is any one thing that word inherently have it is meaning. That a word is transmitted as sound and understood by the receiving party isn’t proof that words are empty, it is a demonstration of how the meaning is communicated. A dog barking is communicating as well, just with less precision and fidelity. The bark still has meaning whether we understand it or not, just as our words have meaning, whether the dog understands it or not.

                If we are to understand that words have no power that point is poorly demonstrated by people who suggest that if someone used the word n*gga in reference to themselves, they wouldn’t get upset, but yet would respond in a way to offend the other person or to make them look stuppid. If that is the case, have you NOT just demonstrated that the word has power? If it is benign, why is any response warranted at all?

                If the argument is that it’s the person’s intent that is offensive, and not their verbiage, how do you perceive the intent minus the words that convey the meaning? And, finally, if you espouse the doctrine that offense is entirely a choice, and that power is expressed by choosing not to care, is it fair to assume you have never been offended by anything anyone has said ever? Because if we follow your rationale to it’s logical conclusion, those were just words too, that carried no overt value. Geraldo didn’t offend any of you all with his hoodie comment concerning Trayvon right? Cause in the end they were just words also. Just food for thought.

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            • I low key wanna kiss you. It’s like the word hoe. I’ve made it a personal mission to steal away the sting of the word from people who would try to use it against me. If I call myself a hoe, only the people who have delayed comprehension problems would follow that up by repeating it. And then the word becomes meaningless. It’s about removing weapons from the powerless. Because if a word is all they have, they have nothing.

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        • “It either becomes commonplace or it fades into obscurity. ”

          This is true. There are two possibilities. And as I stated, we see which possibility has occurred by evidence of today. It is commonplace and we (blacks) are partially to blame.

          And believe me, I am actively thinking of a better ethnic name than both inaccurate terms: African American and Blacks. I’m taking suggestions. Then, I will have a convention to proclaim the new, non-offensive, best-descriptive name in which to refer to our specific ethnic group.

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          • I actually dig Black. It doesn’t bother me at all. In fact, I refer to myself as such, and prefer it over African-American. (I heart everyone from the continent and in the diaspora)

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          • Like I said, words don’t really bother me. I keep my head held high no matter what! I’m young, intelligent, fairly decent looking, a Capricorn, have gotten standing ovations from all the women I’ve had sex with, had the pleasure of seeing Halle Berry get drilled on-screen, was alive to see the greatest movie ever (The Matrix), eat my burgers/sandwiches from the outside in, never ask for napkins when I order fast food because I lick my fingers, got a peen so epic it was bestowed the title of Galactus The Ultimate Destroyher, can say “hello” in two different languages, and a whole bunch of other sh*t.

            Long story short. I’m the mothaf*ckin’ man! And I’m not gonna let someone succeed in making me feel less than human by calling me a word designed to do just that. I’m awesome. And I think every black person should feel that way about themselves. Well, except the ones that look like chewed erasers.

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        • I also though that black meant rich. For some reason thats one of the first words that come to mind.

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          • the term “in the black” is a financial term meaning your books are good, as opposed to being “in the red”, which usually means you are experiencing financial difficulties.

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    • “if the incident was witnessed by other white people, they’d walk up to me afterwards and apologize for the guy’s behavior and compliment the way I handled the situation.”

      Because they know that the only reason he said that was because he was an arsehole trying to start something. Oh, how I despise arseholes no matter what color they are! Good for you TUK. It takes a bigger man to walk away than to stoop to that level. *hugs TUK*

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      • Aww thanks nilla. It’s always nice to feel a pair of breasts against my chest during a hug. Sh*t is oddly satisfying for some reason.

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    • I generally like to flip it on white people who use that word, so call them ni66a back. Often to see what they’ll do and to see if they know their history. Which is to say, we all come from essentially the same place and are all black on the inside-how about we embrace that?

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    • No lie, you get a full endorsement from me.

      On everything you said.

      And I agree with Jay. Words inherently mean nothing. Culture and contexts may give certain words certain connotations, but inherently? Nothing. The entire notion of deconstruction comes to mind when trying to analyse language and realising that the sign, signifier, signified, etc, are independent of each other. But whatever.

      It all boils down to this: the mere fact that this was even a “huge issue” that has gotten so much attention that the media blew it up, to the guy on Monday making a comment to PJ about it, to PJ actually making this post is, honestly, laughable. I get that some people don’t like the word. I respect that. I try to honour that around some of my friends who I know cringe when they hear it. As for me? I’m not bothered. What DOES bother me is when I’m accused of not being affected by it cause I grew up in another country. That’s nonsense. I mean, I wasn’t affected, that’s true, but if that’s the excuse used, it only emphasises my point about words inherently having no meaning.

      Ya dig?

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      • I love that!!!!

        That’s what I’ve been saying 4eva n a day (#KRIT). The term African-American irks me. If you were born in the USA, you’re bloody American. The end.

        Smokey gets +10 from me.

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  13. Im curious to see what errbody on here has to say about this one. Mite be enlighting for the likes of me, a white person that says it. I dont feel white tho, for the record. I dont even KNOW any white ppl personally exept my sugardaddy lmao. But im still interested to kno what yall think. *sits over to the side observing*

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    • Hol’up!!! You’re white? Motherf*cker!!! Well, you sh*t outta luck. Because in my head I had envisioned you as a 21 year old half-black, half-native american (you are the great grand daughter of a war chief, hence the “princess” part of your name) woman who aspires to be a a fashion designer and has a penchant for diamonds (which explains the “ice” part of your name).

      This was my depiction of you since the beginning. And now you tellin’ me I gotta re-do my sh*t? F*ck that! You know how long it took me to come up with that back story?

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      • @ tuk- sorry man. You got the diamond thing dead rite. But no, no pocohantis (sp?) Lmao. They say i look like J lo or fergie. Im not as old as them tho (31).

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        • Now, when you say J lo, are you talking about just the face? Or does that include the body as well? Because if it does, I think now is the perfect time to lie to you and say I work for a modeling agency and I need you to send me some clothed pics of you as well as some fully nude pics (to confirm you didn’t use enhancers like buttpads or padded bras in your clothed pics).

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      • @ TUK… how long you gonna go round thinking white girls are not? LOL Y’all funny. Iceprincess let that cat out of the bag a LONG time ago.

        What up Iceprincess? They just don’t know, huh? ;)

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        • Did she now? Well she never gave me any cat. Because if she did, I would’ve definitely remembered her being white.

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    • Uh? Don’t say it? *Giving you a serious side eye*

      You asked for a response, here is mine (with all do respect):
      Why would you even want to use a term that you know is offensive? Why would you think it’s okay to say it just because you associate more with blacks? I’m black and I don’t say it. And believe me, if you came around me talking in such a way, I would not hold my tongue. You may not offend the people you are around but you are sure to offend someone, which is why no one should use the word.

      I think it is a grave miscalculation, and a generalization of black people, to assume that saying it is okay because you are around black people who say it. Not all black people are the same; therefore it may go over well with your friends but not with someone in the grocery store listening to you talk.

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      • Yea, i totally get that. Fair enuf. However i dont go around saying “n*gga n*gga n*gga!!” all day in grocery stores. Im not on a suicide mission lol. But i do use it around ppl that kno me well, & they wouldnt even bat an eyelash. I mite get dragged over the coals today by some of you, but @ least im brave enuf to admit it & have the conversation.

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        • Your right. A civil conversation on the subject is important. I would like to hear your answer to my questions about why you say it. Neither I nor my friends say it and we are black. Even if someone told me its ok to say it, which as a black person, I am deemed “worthy” to say it, I still refuse to say it because it is such a disrespectful word.

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          • To your question of WHY i say it, i really dont even have a good answer for you. Ive never thought about it that hard. Its just a generic word to me. I guess i dont HAVE to say it, cuz i get how that prolly looks crazy. Maybe i’ll stop & just replace it with “mothaf*cker”. Lol. “Wudup mothaf*cka?” “Mothaf*ckas be trippin.” “Girl in 2012 i aint f*ckin wit no more broke mothaf*ckas”.

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            • @ IP- There you have it. Problem solved. If I were you I’d prolly use ninja because it sounds similar and has the same number of syllables (so it’ll flow off the tongue just as smooth) but to each their own and sh*t lol

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              • Not coming at anyone but personally I HATE NINJA!!!! Its like using goshdarnitt when you want to say gotdammit. I hate that. Like I said upthread words are technically empty, its the sentiment behind them. And when all of you say ninja… the n*gga sentiment is there! At least have the balls to express whats on your heart. I don’t like pretending and I hate being bull$hitted. It just sounds fake to me personally. Its even a big part of why I changed my original gravatar picture. It was a ninja and the name of my old blog was called “We Were Ninjas” but it had NOTHING to do with the euphemism for n*gga. It was more about how when me and my friends were kids we were all obsessed Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and swore UP AND DOWN that we were ninjas.

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        • “Im not on a suicide mission lol.”

          Right?! There is a time and a place, and I’m sure most of the black folks here recognize that too. I’m quite sure we’re all smart enough to realize what we can and cannot say comfortably around some people, in what setting, and when. Obviously, all personalities are not the same and when there is no malice in the type of speech that’s being used, intelligent people understand.

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    • @iceprincess:

      This is a curious statement to me: “I dont feel white tho, for the record. I dont even KNOW any white ppl personally exept my sugardaddy lmao.”

      Being from WV and often being the ONLY person of color in MANY a given situation, I have never not felt Black, African-American or what have you.

      I think because I’ve had so much exposure to non-blacks, I cringe at any use of what I consider to be ethnic or socio-economic slurrs for ANY group of people. Many a friend would refer to themselves or others as RedN*ck, Trailer Trash and it always just struck me as odd as black people using the N-word and makes me just as uncomfortable with the situation. I am aware that many use these terms as affection and familiarity, but I still don’t think anyone should use these terms and many others that are derogatory to any culture, because it only takes a second for someone’s anger or hurt to change that affection into denigration, words slip out in anger and then it’s not fun and games!

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  14. 1. Here’s one:
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kEgNKAR-L24
    The video just wouldn’t work unless those white guys could say it.

    2. When a white actor’s character is a racist. Of course he/she’s supposed to use it!

    3. When quoting Dave Chapelle. “F*** yo couch” doesn’t sound right unless it’s punctuated with the N-bomb.

    But on a serious note, we should realize that there are much more pressing matters to address than ownership of a word. The one thing that bugs me more than black people using it, is the demand that white people do NOT use it while black people do. That hypocrisy grates my nerves something fierce.

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  15. I don’t think Non-Black people should say it #kanyeshrug
    I was the only black in the room and white frat boy type started singing/rapping a song and said “Ni99a” …all of a sudden there was an awkward pause and then he looked up saw me and turned red, and was like I’m not racist blah de blah…I didn’t have to say ANYTHING and he and fellow nonblack peers were convicted….bc THAT ISH CRAY everybody wanna be a Ninja but don’t wanna be a Ninja

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      • To quote Paul Mooney: Everybody wants to be a n!gga, but nobody wants to be a n!gga. That’s how I feel about. When you’re willing to relinquish every bit of white privilege that you have and be viewed as Black, then you can casually say it as much as you want. And considering that isn’t really possible unless you do some (fictional) permanent pigment transfer, it doesn’t need to be said at all. I don’t care how many Black people you grew up around or smanged.

        If you don’t have to worry about being treated like that all the time then you shouldn’t attempt to re-appropriate words that have been used by others. If you ain’t willing to get shot by the police 50 times for existing and then not having them getting charged don’t say it. If you’re not willing to be constantly randomly searched don’t say it. If you’re not willing to pay double or triple what a house or car is worth regardless of your credit score don’t say it. If you’re not willing to have people with half as much credentials as you hired over you and them being your boss because you’re Black don’t say it. Basically, white people you go around saying don’t really WANT to be treated like a n!gga.

        If you have the time read Norman Mailer’s essay “The White Negro”. http://www.dissentmagazine.org/online.php?id=26

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        • @ Malik,

          Thank you so much! EXACTAMUNDO! If you are going to associate, or for a minute consider yourself as being black, you might as well be down for the whole cause!

          I’ll have a look at the article……thanks.

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        • Ok malik but racism is not that simple, its much more complex. True story: bout 3 yrs ago my former roomate (black male) & i were apartment hunting in ATL. He goes by himself to look @ the apt. The leasing agent is a black female in her 30′s. She tells him $850 a month. I go alone the next day, & she gives me a quote of $800! We were jus like ” aint this a b*tch” smh. Mind you this was a black woman who jacked up the price for my friend. So riddle me this batman- is it still “white privilege” when its being dished out by black folks?

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          • Could they simple have reduced the price because of lack of interest? Or because she thought me made more money? Thinking out loud…

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          • Well you’re right, racism is more complicated, but your example shows on of the most unfortunate aspects of racism. The targets of racism usually begin to internalize it the same way the targets of bullying do. Their reactions are pretty similar as well.

            Racism shouldn’t be viewed as a negative character trait as much as it should be viewed as a systemic societal problem. The fringes and the extremist get all of the attention and define the issue in the mind of most people, but its the everyday consequences like the one you mentioned that cause the real problems.

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  17. This is my POV on the “N-word”. It is curse word more potent than the standard ASFD and should never be used by anyone recreationally and, with some limitations, can be used artistically.

    You don’t teach your kids curse words, so why would you want to teach them the N-word. And why would you want to use it?

    And for the love of Christ, it is NOT a term of ENDEARMENT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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  18. The most interesting about this post, PJ, is that you say it’s okay for White folks to use the “N” word (in certain circumstances) and yet you never actually use the word in your post. You write it as “N*gga” instead of actually spelling it.

    As for White people using the “N” word; I’ve seen one too many White person get a little too much pleasure out of saying the “N” word while reciting rap lyrics in front of Black people.

    The word should be off limits to everyone, period.

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  20. By the way, Dyson’s defense of the n-word is HYPOCRITICAL. I just wanted that to be known, very! There is no way on earth you can push the black agenda/rhetoric, want to be recognized as “equals” by the majority, at the same damn time and have the audacity to take a 1000 years of step backwards, in defense of that term, clouded in a lot of over usage of overthetopdotcom terminology that will have you thinking he is saying something, but really nothing at all.

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  21. Question: You want to know how to give a controversial word even more power.

    Answer: Try to stop people from saying it.

    Our rallying cries about the N-word only prove time and time again that we don’t understand how power really works. It proves that as a people we can be SO over-emotional that its not funny.

    I believe that the ONLY reason that we still have strong feelings about that word, and this is coming from experience, is because in certain situations it does exactly what it is supposed to do: make us feel like “lesser thans”. I have lived in the south for my entire life, mostly Mobile, AL, a stones throw from Mississippi where the racism is “stewed to perfection”. I’ve been called the n-word more times than I can count, since before I could count. After hearing it so many times as a kid, I realized WHY it stung. It hurt because our post civil-rights era generations have been raised to believe that we are all equals. Before the 1960′s, and even after to be honest, black people KNEW that they were second class citizens. There was no way for them to delude themselves. Minute to minute almost, they were reminded of it. We didn’t grow up that way. We have all been socialized believing that race doesn’t matter. When we hear the n-word it strips all of that away.

    When a dirty poor trailer trashy white kid called me a n*gger it didn’t affect me so much. But when a middle class spoiled suburban kid said it, it hurt because I KNEW that in a lot of ways his life was better than mine. His parents didn’t have to struggle, he probably got pretty much everything he wanted, and generally had a better life than me. The word INSTANTLY brought all of that to mind for me personally as a kid.

    I feel that in some way this is how we all feel deep down about the word. We know that over a quarter of all black people live below the poverty line… This is not OK.

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    • My whole point was… I don’t care WHO says the N-word. Its a losing battle at best and at its worst its us hacking at branches instead of dealing with the REAL issues. Its an emotional tinderbox which is why we jump on it so fast. Dealing with the real issues… that takes work… and more work, it requires us to think harder, to find solutions, to make tough decisions, to address our own bullsh*t. Thats what we should be doing instead of going to war with a word.

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      • @ Jay,

        Just so I am clear, you are saying that the n-word should be liberally used by all and sundry? Or are you saying that there are underlying issues to the use of the n-word, that we need to examine, instead of focusing on that term alone. Or, am I completely off base in my comprehension of your comment?! Thanks much.

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        • What I’m saying is that it is a word. I have ABSOLUTELY NO part nor parcel in who uses the word. I can’t tell you what to do. I can’t tell ANYONE what to do. Therefore it is a waste of my energy to attempt to. The first part of my post was my understanding of why we do feel a certain way when hearing it or being called it. But I think that we need to rise above it because A.) We are not children, like T.U.K. said “sticks and stones”. I think we sing this song as kids because it is a lesson we ALL need to learn early in life. and B.) We will NEVER EVER NEVER EVER win the fight against the N-word. Lets stop wasting time and energy on it.

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          • Jay: I get where you are coming from. Its to late for black folks to get all hyped up over the use of the N-word by 2520s. We lost that battle when we decided to make the N-word so USER FRIENDLY. If we wanted it to remain a word that is taboo/off-limits then we should have never allow it be used to replace so many words in our day to day conversations.

            Example:
            Boy 1: Wussup ninja
            Boy 2: Maynnnne, homes a ninja just trying to live
            Boy 1: Ninja did you see that Heat and Boston game last night?
            Boy 2: Yo son, them ninjas went HAM on the Heat.

            Yeahhhhh, soooooo um my point, its ya’ll ninjas fault that the N-word no longer makes folks cringe when its used. IJS and in my humble opinion of course.

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      • ” Its a losing battle at best and at its worst its us hacking at branches instead of dealing with the REAL issues. Its an emotional tinderbox which is why we jump on it so fast. Dealing with the real issues… that takes work… and more work, it requires us to think harder, to find solutions, to make tough decisions, to address our own bullsh*t. Thats what we should be doing instead of going to war with a word.”

        Gives Jay a standing ovation.

        S/N: For some reason I thought you were from Baltimore though. Did I dream that or something? lol

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        • LOL I’ve lived a lot of places, Baltimore isn’t one of them. I’m either from Alabama or Georgia depending on how you judge being from somewhere.

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    • Regular lurker, delurking… Whoa!!! Jay, your post hit so close to home! I, too, grew up in Mobile, AL…Grand Bay to be more precise (do you know where that is?) Talk about being a “stone throw away from Mississippi” in THAT little town in the last 70′s and all of the 80′s! And, I’m currently in North Central, AL now…B’ham to be exact. Just saying, “Hello!” Turns out you’re my Home Boy after all, like for real! LOL.

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        • Do I know where Grand Bay is……!? OF COURSE! Comment more often. Follow me on Twitter(click on my name). I’m always ecstatic as hell to find out about other VSB/VSS in Bama. We are by and large outnumbered here.

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  22. #3 is what makes certain folks bold now. Out here in L.A. it’s a little ridiculous. You wouldn’t believe the Asian, white, and Hispanics who have a field day with this.

    Anyhow, I think it’s acceptable for “others” to use it when quoting a source. Other than that, I’m passing out side eyes. I never quite understood the fascination with people wanting to use the N-word. I also never understood how they could remain desensitized to the majority of Black’s feelings towards them using the word. Real talk, if Asians were to refer to themselves as “ch*nks” and Hispanics were to refer to themselves as “sp*cs,” and these epithets became popular enough to casually reference without reproach, I would still NEVER use them. I just can’t get down with this. I understand the pain of what it means to some. Granted, some might fling around the reasoning that’s it’s just a word and we assign it power, but nonetheless, I’m still cognizant enough to understand the weight it carries and how it makes some individuals feel. That’s just me.

    As for Gwenyth using it, I blame that on the Throne. Truthfully, I hate the title “Ni**as in Paris.” I cringed when I found out this would be released as a single. I knew stuff like this Gwyneth incident was going to happen. I’m surprised there haven’t been more cases. But, I think what I hate hearing the most is how the Throne is performing this song multiple times in front of audiences that are predominately not Black. Like how do you really not expect for people to get reckless with the usage? I digress though.

    By the way, I enjoyed your two day zombie post and Champ’s embarrassing moment post…LOL. Sometimes we need a little levity is our day to day. Gwyneth Paltrow using the N-word is not that pressing. *Ni***a in Paris shrug*

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    • I’m SO glad you brought up L.A>, cause when I wen tout there I noticed that too. Every ethnic group was extremely comfortable with it, so being the sociologist and realsouthernbrothawhogetsdownforthecause that I am, I conducted a lil experiment. Every time we went to a club or party where the word got dropped, I immediately started droppin an ethnic slur that referred to the offender as if it was aaaaall love. For example, the first party was of course a Mexican joint, so as soon as they all got liquored up the ninja bomb starts gettin dropped easier than Rihanna’s drawls, so I start smiling big and saying loudly but to no one in particular, “yeah bro, me and my $pics LOVE this song! Ayo $pic! What up fool, I missed you at the park today! $pics was trippin out therer yo! Hahaaaa! Yea!” Within 60 seconds of this action, all the Mexicans have the “my feelings are hurt and I wanna fight” face. Yeah, exactly. Round two, my Fillipina homegirl invites me to the Pacquiao/Marquez fight and the SAME thing happens, “See! See! That’s why that ninja Mayweather don’t wanna fight the lion of the Phillipines! If he was a real ninja he wouldn;t care about no drug test!” My response” I wit you chinc, that dude wants no parts of a real @ss chinc like my man Manny yo!” SILENCE. Yea, that’s what I thought. Kick rock wit open-toed shoes on. It’s all good when you get to air someone one else’s oppression out there, but when its yours….

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      • I’m glad you did your little experiment. I’ve always maintained other ethnicities wouldn’t like if I casually referenced them by an epithet…even if it was all in love. Smh.

        But everyone wanna be a down a** ninja I see. I’m so over LA.

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      • I wish I might spit out the two precious pejorative gems used to those who might utter n* in my presence here. I’d get stomped into the earth. There is a certain class of people here that will say it to your face and they are effing dangerous.

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    • The issue here- IMO- is that the n-word is so popular because n-words are popular and n-words are using it. Hip hop culture is a big part of American culture. We know it’s emulated in many ways (clothing, manner of speech, dance) so why not language. They’re cool with calling each other niggaz because we’re cool each other niggaz- “I learned it from watching you dad!”- if you will…LOL

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    • Gwyneth is not a two year old who will hear a word then repeat it and giggle cause she knows she’s not supposed to say it. She’s a grown azz woman who know better. If you treat white people like children who can’t tell the difference, what are you saying?

      If you know not to call an Asian a ch*nk despite hearing them refer to each other, then….

      Are you mad that you aren’t allowed? Are you confused by the hypocrisy? Are you gonna impose your will and your “right” to call Asians ch*nks? No. That would be obnoxiously presumptuous, boneheaded. That would be your common sense, manners, decency and respect for others being overrun by a sense of entitlement. Aka white privilege.

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      • @ WC

        “Gwyneth is not a two year old who will hear a word then repeat it and giggle cause she knows she’s not supposed to say it. She’s a grown azz woman who know better. If you treat white people like children who can’t tell the difference, what are you saying?”

        Oh, I totally get it. I don’t agree with Gwyneth’s usage at all. But the reason I assigned blame to the Throne is because she’s in their close circle. Unlike most white people, she has a rapport with the individuals responsible for this song. Obviously, they made her feel comfortable enough to where she could be reckless and tweet about “Ni**as in Paris*. I wouldn’t be surprised if Jay referred to her and Chris as his “ni**as.” Also, when you create a song as mainstream as “Ni**as in Paris,” and play it NUMEROUS times back to back at shows, it should be anticipated, as unfortunate as it may be, that some folks are going to get out of pocket and find comfort in using the word. It doesn’t make it right, but that’s the downside of popularizing it and using it in an extremely mainstream context.

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    • “Hispanics were to refer to themselves as “sp*cs,””

      I think that’s because plenty of Hispanics that weren’t here during the 60s and 70s (when that term was widely used) know what it means and how it pertains to us. I know what “spic” is because of the show “All in the Family.” Archie Bunker used that word once. It’s also the language barrier–it’s said in English, not Spanish, so some might not even know they’re being offended.

      I’m Hispanic. I call myself Latina, since Hispanic was a derogatory term. Break up the word–his, panic. We are the White man’s panic. I don’t personally get offended by it but I take more pride in calling myself Latina. And when I use “spic” it’s always in front of “others.” I know they’re saying it too. Might as well beat them to the punch and show that they don’t own me or that word. As for the n word, I also refer to myself in that way, but only in front of 2520s. I find that they tend to use that word with other minorities as if they feel safe saying it with us because we’re not Black. I don’t know if any other Latinos or minorities have noticed that. Not all White folks, though.

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      • “think that’s because plenty of Hispanics that weren’t here during the 60s and 70s (when that term was widely used) know what it means ”

        correction: DON’T KNOW WHAT IT MEANS.

        sorry.

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      • My BFF is Hispanic, and refers to herself as such, so I do, as well. :)
        I’ve been around her and her fam, and they use the “w” term, they throw it around similar to how we through around the “n” word in the company of our folks.

        However, I’d never turn around and say the word that they use. We’ve been friends more than half our lives, so I definitely know better. It’s not even a question.

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    • If the song was called Ball So Hard, no one would’ve noticed if she tweeted “Ball So Hard for real!”

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  24. Panama! You finally got it up! — the website I mean. ;) LOL

    Ah, the N-word. A long time ago I explained that I don’t normally use it (BTW, I’m white (and some other things, but mostly white)). My black friends call me that all the freaking time. Like they don’t even think about what they are saying in terms of skin color or racial slur or whatever. But, then again, most of them consider me black anyways. *shrugs*

    I did use it in anger against my ex-husband once, in front of some white cops, and they apparently were more offended than he was. Dammit. ;) LOL I won’t go back into that situation, but it was a day of war between him and I. End that there.

    My bestie, a Filipino man, is ALWAYS sliding this word in. He’ll call and say “What up n*gga?” Or in conversation he’ll make a point of something and say “You know that ain’t right kneegrow.” Though he ain’t black, his child is half black and his sister’s are married to black men. I heard him on the phone with one of his brothers-in-law one day and I swear to hear them talk was normal for two black dudes, but he ain’t black. *shrugs* He’s always telling me things about being a minority which kind of jolts me because I really don’t think like that. He’s a man to me. Period.

    Songs: Yes, in songs that get released (and I think Lil Wayne is the worst, could be others) I sing the lyrics as is. I burn my cd’s without remorse and slide on down the street rapping all the way saying exactly how the lyrics are recorded. The only time I thought it was a lil awkward was one day I was cleaning out my garage and my music was blasting I think Shawty Say by David Banner ft. Lil Wayne. I’m working and singing not really paying attention when a white lady pulls up to get her mail out of her mailbox and got a serious side eye from her. Ooops. Yeah, I guess that was a lil awkward for me to be singing that song. LOL

    At any rate, I agree with some of the other posts. Some people just give this word too much power. If it is not being used in a fashion to demean someone then it’s just another word. And, as many here know, racial slurs for white folks don’t bother me either. I don’t give them power. I just keep it moving.

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    • Co-sign your lastparagraph. Exactly! If anybody on here feels some type of way, pleez feel free to call me a h*nky, cracka azz cracka, wet dog, or anything else you can think of lmfao

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    • “I did use it in anger against my ex-husband once, in front of some white cops, and they apparently were more offended than he was.”

      So…your ex was black and out of anger you brazenly called him a *n* in front of white cops? I feel some kinda way about this…there are a myriad of things running through my mind right now and none are good.

      Even in anger, why would you do that and in front of other whites no less?

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      • It was probably like “n*gga you aint $hit.” Black and Latin women say this as well. Everyone uses the term out of anger and love.

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        • Not everyone. *shrugs*

          Something about the convenience of the situation and not to mention her quote from up thread, “Because they know that the only reason he said that was because he was an arsehole trying to start something. ” It just gave me a bad feeling that it was an attempt at provocation and secondly asserting white power privilege in the face of authority in an attempt to gain their support perhaps inciting them to beat the sh!t out of the old boy.

          Perhaps, it was not like that at all. I’ll confess, I always think the worst of people.

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          • Meh…don’t look so deeply into it. I think that is part of the problem with word usage. We look so deeply into something instead of reading or seeing what is right in front of her. Personally, I have heard many a black women say things like a “n*ggas aint sh*t.” They aren’t asserting any type of privilege. They are simply saying that his crusty behind isn’t worth 2 nickels.

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          • “It just gave me a bad feeling that it was an attempt at provocation”

            It probably was. Maybe I was hoping his arse would start something in front of the cops and get his arse beat. BELIEVE ME… he would have deserved it!

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          • LOL!!! Read what i wrote to Erica. I don’t know the person i responded to up thread but I honestly don’t have a problem with someone of a different race saying it. Now, if she said something along the lines of you “f*cking n*gga” well that is harsh but then he could say you “white crusty a$$ b*tch.” Seriously, in the heat of the moment, phrases and words get thrown around all the time. Doesn’t mean you actually mean what you are saying.

            Have you ever seen A Bronx Tale (my favorite film) when C called the black chick’s brother a n*gga? That was said out of anger, not b/c that was how he actually felt.

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      • @ erika, this ain’t the first time I’ve discussed this here, but it has been a while. THAT word has been defined as “trash” & “ignorant.” I do not know why when you look it up in modern dictionaries or online that it takes a different meaning of “black person”, but that is not my personal reference.

        This is fact: I will call my ex-husband what ever the hell I want to and it has nothing to do with the fact of what color he is. It’s about about his actions and his behavior. No, he is not black. He’s Arab and he’s an arsehole to the max.

        On that particular day, he acted like an arse and called the cops to force me to do something that he knew damn well he could not force, and the cops knew it too. When one of the cops said he was going to arrest me for a charge that I knew he could not legally do without a court order, I ate his white arse for breakfast, lunch AND dinner. I cursed his arse out, told him to get off my property, and to take that n*gg*r with him. Yes, I was angry. No, I will not apologize. I meant every damn word.

        Now, back to the actions and behavior part. THAT is what this word is all about and it’s not just me that thinks like this, but many black folks that I know. My friends and I have had this discussion, repeatedly. One of my black male friends in one of our discussions told me once, “You know there are ‘nigg*s’ and then there are ‘nigg*rs’, and I’m sure you know what I’m talking about.” I do and I understand.

        At the end of the day, this word does not change the fact that I love, care for, and respect my friends whatever ethnicity they are. I value them as people with hopes, dreams and desires just like me.

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        • On the word itself. I recall way back in the days the 80′s sitting in class and some black kids were trying to explain that N* was really by definition an uncouth person. I demanded they show me in an actual dictionary, they couldn’t. And it most certainly wasn’t in the Webster I had at the time, that had belonged to my grandparents and was as good as vintage. It said otherwise: n. a Negro person. It was also annotated as being derogatory. I think it puts a lot of people’s minds at ease, to adopt the other, non-racial, meaning but it’s not the true meaning.

          Anyway, the day Jew’s embrace k*, I might be open to n* and all its variants. Until then I give everyone the side eye who uses it.

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    • The N-word, hard to explain why it is such an issue for black people to others. its probably annoying to think that you can be deemed something as vile as a racist for using a word that is used frequently in pop culture.

      But I guess the only way to explain it is that that one single word represents the slavery and racism that is impossible to separate from the black experience more than any other. The word in its original context was used to separate black into a subhuman group that could be treated as property. Slavery wasn’t new, but chattel slavery distinguishes forced servitude of people from dehumanizing a person and treating them and their offspring as property, like an animal.

      Using the same word to describe us that that same people who lynched and raped and enslaved our ancestors used as a racial slur to describe us when justifying their behavior not too many generations ago kind of puts those usually subdued feelings related to that front and center. It really is hard to explain how visceral the reaction can be.

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        • It’s easy to forget that people don’t always see the world through the same eyes as you, and that their actions may not always be driven by hatred.

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          • “It’s easy to forget that people don’t always see the world through the same eyes as you, and that their actions may not always be driven by hatred.”

            I agree with you Meech. I get a bit careless with the word ‘ninja’ now because I read it here so often. I’ve been ‘reprogrammed’, if you will. I understand that it is used here to replace the other word. But, I catch myself saying that more easily than ‘n*gga’ which ain’t good either especially to my Asian friends! LOL

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            • Yeah I don’t get offended, because as I said downthread nobody gets that kinda power over me. However I do judge a non-black person that uses the word. I assume a white person that uses that word freely or is comfortable saying it (even if as a quote) doesn’t respect me or black people. I could be wrong, but that’s just what I assume. I treat them accordingly…It is what is is…I don’t think too hard about it. It’s just a quick snap judgment. We all make them.

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              • I respect you JMTG. You’re a man. I give everyone a certain level of respect based on many different factors. More so if I know them personally, even intimately. We’ve talked and played on this blog for a while now, with many others. If you guys can’t ‘see’ who I am by now, then, okay, whatever. I ain’t gonna act all foolish trying to change anyone’s opinion. I ain’t got time. I am who I am love me or hate me. It ain’t no thang. Peace.

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      • Ain’t defending it Mami. I wish no one would use it, even myself when angered @ arsehole. But, I did and it’s over. I don’t feel that way about too many people and I certainly don’t view the entire black population with disdain. If we could get folks like Lil Wayne and JayZ to give it a rest, it might just fade. Me no know, but I can always have hope. ;)

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  25. Im from Alabama. There was a time when a white person saying nigga or nigger would offend me. But it was mostly because my grandparents were really involved in the civil rights movement. My grandfather was a Panther in New York and my grandmother marched in Birmingham. Because of their experiences they had me thinking that the white man was the white man was bad. Bad. Bad. And I’ve personally been called nigger as if I was the most diabolical MF in the world. I. Don’t know if you’ve felt hate when someone has spoken to you, but I felt like I was in Mississippi Burning. Lol but its not in my nature as an individual to hold
    I have very close friends who happen to be white. You couldn’t tell my heart that we aren’t brothers. when jesting and

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    • Sorry bout the end part. But what I was saying was. It is not in my nature to hold grudges for any reason. I have white friend who I hold dear and I know their hearts. You couldn’t tell my heart we aren’t brothers. We use it jokingly and sometimes as a term of endearment sometimes. Women do the same thing with bitch all the time. of course therev is a time and place for it cause u dont want to upset others. Nigga doesnt bother me. What does bother me is disrespect. So if ANYONE used ANY word to offend me I would be upset. I understand that black people have gone through a lot, but u can’t dwell on the past if u want to move forward. And we as a race hace to follow the same principal.

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  26. The crazy thing about “n*gga” is that its been so overused in Gen X&Y that it doesnt even neccesarily mean “black” anymore. At least not the way me & my friends talk. Example: you & ur friends are out somewhere. You say, “damn that dude is fly, thats that hermes H buckle belt he got on.” Your friend says “where?” You point & say “rite there! That asian n*gga. See him?” Ijs food for thought…

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  27. I’ve thrown my hands up on n***a a while ago, 2520s use it at your own risk i’m not gonna be the one to attack you for it. Stopping every person who isnt at least 50% black from saying it is a lost cause, You can’t win (c) Adrian. Call me a n***a thats your behind, then again call me anything in the wrong way and thats your behind.

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  28. Oh shoot I think I’m about to go off on this one.

    Is there anybody who isn’t oppressed today? Just a question. Is there one group, whether it is business men, women, men, Hispanics, Asians, hell even white people who doesn’t feel like society takes a dump on them every single day, whether it’s through the media, music, movies etc? Aren’t we all now a nation of victims?

    This reaction to Gwyneth Paltrow tweeting N**ga, is a prime example of a victim mentality. First off, it completely and I mean completely doesn’t even consider CONTEXT. Second, why are black people mad about white people saying a word, that we know they say to each other all the time, when we’re not looking – then we complain about white people being phony all the time – Hypocrisy #1.

    Another thing that is bothersome about this whole thing with the N-word, is the victim mentality. If a person thinks they’re oppressed all the time, and that the odds are against them, and the use of a particular word reinforces that feeling of oppression all the time, how the fVck is that person supposed to have “legitimate” pride or self-esteem? The whole purpose of self-esteem is the belief that one can control their life, and that they can control their destiny, if a white person saying a word can completely rob you of that feeling of control, how can you actually stand there and honestly say you have high self-esteem. If that’s all true, isn’t that just an admission, that all the bravado that black men generally handle themselves with and the strong and independent mantra given off by black women are in fact farces, used to hide and evade the fact that we simply have low self-esteem? – Hypocrisy #2

    Finally, we wouldn’t be having this conversation if Gwyneth Paltrow simply used N-word instead of N**ga, and if that isn’t the greatest admission of phoniness of us as a people I don’t know what is. Every 4 yr old in America knows the N-word = N**ga!!! So why are we mad, that this goofy country white girl, had a case of honesty, and did something that we already know white people do all the time? (And for the record, why would any real N**ga care about what Ironman’s woman got to say? Just wondering) If we all know white people say words talk sh*t all the time about us and everybody else, and we belief racism today is covert, why then are we mad that someone was finally honest? Shouldn’t we be celebrating the fact that a white person slipped, instead of having sentimental conversations about n**ga and our feelings of inferiority?

    This is the same story that applies to all people who bask too long in the limelight of victim-hood. At first, some person or some group makes them believe they are oppressed, and these people who are made knowledgeable of their oppression, begin to fight for power to defeat that oppression and they begin to develop pride in themselves, and their self-esteem skyrockets. However, the longer that feeling of victim-hood lasts the less likely those feelings of pride and self-esteem are going to last, but that thirst for power continues to grow, before you know it, the victim now seeks retribution and wishes to find a way to oppress the oppressor, and before you know it, the victim now thinks justice is having control over those who had control over you, just like we see with a lot of feminists today…I don’t think I need to tell you where black people are or where they’re heading.

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    • “However, the longer that feeling of victim-hood lasts the less likely those feelings of pride and self-esteem are going to last, but that thirst for power continues to grow, before you know it, the victim now seeks retribution and wishes to find a way to oppress the oppressor, and before you know it, the victim now thinks justice is having control over those who had control over you, just like we see with a lot of feminists today…”

      *shotsmuthaf*ckinfired!!!!!!*

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    • “Is there anybody who isn’t oppressed today? Just a question. Is there one group, whether it is business men, women, men, Hispanics, Asians, hell even white people who doesn’t feel like society takes a dump on them every single day, ?”

      -False equivalence. Feeling oppressed doesn’t equal being oppressed, so pointing out that people from various groups may feel that way wrongly does nothing but trivialize what may be a valid issue for some.

      “Second, why are black people mad about white people saying a word, that we know they say to each other all the time, when we’re not looking – then we complain about white people being phony all the time.”

      - Straw-man argument. You’re creating an counterpoint to support an unrelated point. Not really sure “white people are phonier than other races” is a meme in the black community.

      “Another thing that is bothersome about this whole thing with the N-word, is the victim mentality.”

      -Not sure how or where you established that taking offense to a word that is universally recognized as offensive is exhibiting a victim’s mentality.

      Not really sure why I broke this down like that, I think it’s because I don’t like it when people take an issue and try to force it into their preconceived gripes. Clearly you don’t like the perceived victim mentality in the black community, but I’m not sure if this has anything to do with that.

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      • Feeling oppressed doesn’t equate with being oppressed…of course you’d say that. Ever have a white guy sit down and talk to you for hours about how he’s oppressed simply by white guilt…I have, his arguments were very convincing and I actually believed him (the guy literally was in tears after about an hour). Ever have a white woman explain to you that she’s oppressed by the constant images of skinny anorexic women walking down the runway and these are the manifestations of beauty in white America, I have and I was convinced that she was oppressed. Ever have a black man tell you that he’s oppressed since all the images he sees in the media are of thugs and describe his existence as negative, I got that as well didn’t even need an explanation, because I live the life. Ever have a sista tell you that she’s oppressed, because she lives in a society where the image of beauty is defined by white skin, I have as well, and I was convinced.

        Of course, it’s easy to say other people’s oppressions are simply felt, when yours is real, when you don’t open up your mind to the fact, that the only reason why you think your oppression is real is because you live it. Just as it is easy for you to marginalize the oppression other people go through as “feelings”, it is quite easy for others to marginalize what you go through as feelings, and truth be told that is the case in America today, isn’t it?

        As for the supposed “Straw man argument”, I don’t know based on my experience, maybe we differ the biggest complaint I hear from black people in regards to racism, is that it can’t be proven, that it is done in secret. “Racism still alive, they just be concealing it” – Kanye West in other words white people are still racist they’re just being phony about it. So my point was that if we all know racism still exists, why do we get mad when it’s out in the open?

        As for the victim mentality and being offended, I grew up in the hood, there’s no white person in the world who can offend me like n**ga in the hood can, there ain’t no white person in the world who can come up with multiple ways to say “I ain’t sh**” like a n**ga, and I bet that that’s the case with most VSBers. So I know that this thing is bigger than simply being offended. Hearing white people saying the N-word, brings back feelings of oppression, which also means feeling of a lack of control which is what all people who identify themselves as victims of exploitation. Now I don’t believe someone can truthfully have high self-esteem and pride, if they think of themselves as a victim, if you know how a person can have that feeling and still have legitimate pride and high self-esteem, please let me know.

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        • I never said anything about who was oppressed or not. I was only addressing the fallacy of your argument. Playing who is the biggest victim or arguing the difference between the burden of white guilt and or being less likely to get a job if you are perceived as black wasn’t my aim. So your point is taken but, I wasn’t arguing that black people have real problems and other groups don’t.

          I think you need to hang around smarter black people. Racism isn’t really hidden and there is abundance of evidence from conviction rates and sentence lengths for equivalent crimes, the job studies I talked about earlier, to subconscious bias testing that shows that people can be “racist” without even consciously trying to do so. But racism exists as a baseline in all cultures, including black ones, so I wasn’t trying to argue that either. But saying that relates to black people saying whites are phony is a stretch.

          If you want to get to a place where no one of another race can offend you and you want to have complete control, by all means go for it. But trying to have complete control is usually a reaction to being made to feel powerless, so instead of trying to rationalize away the forces that made you this way and belittle people that acknowledge their existence, it might be better to come to terms with reality.

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          • I’m not belittling black people’s problems, as mean as my “baseless” arguments might sound. I’ve seen statistics that back up the black idea of oppression, just as I’ve seen statistics that back up white people’s oppression. When it comes to statistics, if you’ve ever come to an argument with a racist, you know first hand, that everybody can find statistics that back up their ideology.

            I’m looking deeper into the problem, which is how is the best way to empower people. From all my experience and all the books I’ve read, from all the things I’ve seen studying the civil rights era, studying revolutions, my time working with mentally ill patients etc. I’ve come to the conclusion that you cannot empower someone who views their self as a victim, plain and simple. That person might have all the reason in the world to be a victim, that person might have been raped, molested, survived genocide etc, but if that person is encouraged to continuously to think as a victim, they will never get out of that oppression.

            As for the idea that I need to talk to smarter black people about racism, I think smarter black people are more the cause of the black victimhood mentality than the dumb ones. The dumb, broke people are too busy trying to live their lives and put food on the table to worry about the several ways in which they’re oppressed. It’s the black intellectuals who spend hours upon hours researching about the ways black people are oppressed, that they never figure out ways to actually help black people to get out of your oppression.

            The only way to defeat an enemy, whether it be racism, intolerance, bigotry etc, is to have people who have pride in themselves and high-self esteem which leads to them having confidence that they can overcome whatever they deem is blocking them from reaching their goals in life. If a nobody on the power-scale like Gwyneth Paltrow can make you feel oppressed just by saying N*gga (not even in an offensive manner), you don’t have the self-esteem, pride or mental toughness needed to win the bigger battle.

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            • agreed……as long as we keep acting like oppressed little victims the plight of the negro in this country will never improve. black people have all the tools necessary to improve our situation. but we’re to busy bitching and moaning about racism all the while waiting for hand outs, and the gov’ to help us raise our bastard children

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            • I can’t even front. I agree with both Black Medici and Medium Meech. I don’t really think you guys are disagreeing that much. I think you’re just focusing on different aspects of the issue. Black Medici is digging deeper to address the issue that black people can actually control and Medium Meech is pointing out the issue that naive and ill-informed white people can’t seem to figure out. I personally think black people have been oppressed (worldwide) more than any group I can think of off the top of my head. And even if I did consider the pressure a white girl feels to be skinny as actual oppression, she’d still lose the oppression battle to a black woman that has that issue plus the hair issue, plus the skin tone issue, plus the issues with discrimination in housing, the justice system, and anything else that involves subjective reasoning on the part of an individual (even if that individual is the same race as she is) with the authority to determine her fate.
              With all that being said though, so what? We’re oppressed the most, and what? Making white people acknowledge this and feel guilty is virtually impossible, and our attempts to do so are only gonna annoy the sh*t out of everybody (black, white, and in between) it ain’t gonna solve our problems. We spend too much time explaining our problems and feelings. If we ain’t talkin bout solutions then we ain’t talkin bout sh*t, we’re just complainin. Only we can solve our problems. Even if it sux that we have to deal with problems nobody else has to deal with, every problem has a solution. That’s the good news. Those solutions will be difficult to figure out and just as difficult to all agree on, but working towards the solutions rather than complaining and explaining the problems ad nauseum is as progressive and productive as a conversation about our issues could possibly be. The point he made about self-esteem and knowing your self worth sounded condescending but it’s real and it’s very poignant. The reason I say this is because it represents treating the disease rather than the symptoms. I could care less about what white people think of us at this point. What do we think of ourselves? How much of our own history do we know? How efficiently and diligently are we working to solve our issues? That’s what I care about. Keep spittin that real BM and MM.

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              • I’m a Nigerian American, in case I’ve never made that clear before, and like a lot of us, it’s very easy for me to marginalize Black American’s plight, because no matter what black people say or complain about, I can simply say to them, “You have 24 hrs worth of electricity, even in prison!” And in real life, that’s how a lot of Africans who come to this country look down on African Americans. The reason why I don’t is because I know everyone has issues, that affects them and affect their outlook on life and it’s unfair to dismiss or compare what they go through to what you’ve gone through and the effect it’s had.

                That being said, I’m an objective guy and I believe in power of the mind to shape destiny. If I’m telling anyone, you’re oppressed, you’re degraded, people look down on you, etc, what effect does that have on the mind that accepts that? The mind decides that it is incapable of doing anything about it. Anybody who works out, has done track, has done a tough task etc understands that the body always suffers from pain, but it’s a strong mind that guides you through the pain to become stronger and faster than you were before. Since the mind is like a muscle, I always aim all my words to toughen it up, for the benefit of the people I’m trying to help. That’s the same thing with black people, if we keep telling people they’re victims and all that, all they’re going to do is continue to be frustrated at their impotence and take out all their frustration out on each other.

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              • I agree. Their arguments don’t really differ that much. I tend to share Medici’s point of view because it takes more of a “ok so what do we DO now” stance.

                “It’s the black intellectuals who spend hours upon hours researching about the ways black people are oppressed, that they never figure out ways to actually help black people to get out of your oppression.”

                Well said, and I consider myself a black intellectual.

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                • Thanks for getting it, but I also want to explain why what these black intellectuals do is dangerous, and the long term effects it’s had on our race.

                  You see, the job of an intellectual is to provide ideas that drive a culture. And a lot of our intellectuals have dedicated their lives, whether they intended it or not, to making black people “aware” of oppression and the injustice that happens to them everyday, this has led to good things, however, in the long run it has really hurt our race.

                  When people feel that they’re victims of injustice what do they do, they get upset, they get mad, they want vengeance. However, here’s the thing: like the drunk man who had a bad day at work, who is he going to take his anger out on? Not his boss, he’s going to take his anger out on his kids, and his wife, whoever is in the vincinity. Same thing with us, we have a generation of black boys and girls, who are angry as hell, who do you think these people are going to take out their anger on, it sure as hell isn’t going to be white people: they’re in the surburbs. They’re gonna eff up their own people, and their own neighborhoods aka black on black crime.

                  So, that’s why I don’t take this victim mentality lightly, eff what people think about us, or even how they treat us, look at the result of our reactions to the way we’ve been treated. That’s why I get upset anytime I hear a black person on Fox or CNN talking about how bad black people got it, because I’m like “When are you going to tell black people how they can have it better, do you even care if black people can have it better?”

                  When you sit back and you wonder why, with all the education with all the money, our generation of blacks are more mad and angry than the people who marched and died during the civil rights era, you begin to scratch your head. They don’t understand that this lack of direction, this overvictimization of ourselves, this lack of pride and self-esteem is killing us slowly like a slow working poison.

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                  • Exactly man. If we’re not gonna be solution oriented I’m not even gonna participate in the discussion from now on. We (black people) have to feel the wrath of other black people even moreso than white people when the smartest individuals of our race are so focused on “awareness” rather than on solving the problems. Imagine spending hours informing and explaining to someone how you came to the conclusion that they’re ugly. What’s the point of that other than making them feel terrible about something they were already living in the first place?

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        • “Hearing white people saying the N-word, brings back feelings of oppression, which also means feeling of a lack of control which is what all people who identify themselves as victims of exploitation.”
          No I see it as disrespect and anger for the fact that we gave this this ability.

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        • Do you know how to call out fake feelings of oppression vs. real ones?

          When some white guy complains about ‘reverse racism’ or what not. I give him the proposition of trading places with one of the 1/4 of Black men in jail. The black guy in the slammer can go live at his house and experience this ‘guilt’ and he can go to the guys jail cell. Sounds good, right?

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          • My cousin from Nigeria just told me that he would gladly take racism, while living in a house with a TV 24 hours electricity as long you pay your bill, with a job at McDonalds for a corrupt government, exploited by Whites and Asians, where the average person goes without electricity for at least a week every 3 months, and is lucky to have electricity for one whole day morning till night.

            Would you like to trade?

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    • @ BM

      How u dey?

      I am against the use of that word from either group, black or white! It is not about victim hood for me! I understand all the points you are trying to make. BUT I cannot shake the feeling I get whenever that word has been directed at me!! DEGRADED. Probably also the setting had a lot to do with it, but mmmmh mmmh, that word just needs to be deaded! Finito……

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      • It will never happen.

        I was talking to one of my exs back in the day who was a woman’s study major, and she was involved in setting up a student run organization that was interested in raising awareness of harassment and sexual assault on the school campus. So I asked her, why don’t you take that thousand dollars you get from the school for your organization, and offer free martial arts classes to women that are interested. She told me it doesn’t matter, because men who wanted to harrass women were going to do so.

        Later on in life, I realized that was one of the flaws of victimhood, you could be a 100% right about your plight, but if you weren’t willing to do anything about it, you would always walk around the world paralyzed with fear. If these women had taken self defense classes, rather than just constantly remind each other that they were under attack, they would’ve been better off. Their self-esteem would have been higher, they would have felt stronger and walk more confidently by themselves when walking down the street.

        That feeling of degradation, that feeling of hatred is all in your mind, and you’re in control of every feeling and every thought that goes through it. If you want to master yourself and be all that you want to be, you have to take responsibility for your life, and stop assigning power to other people. The more you accept the fact that your life is your own, and you’re not living for anyone but yourself, you realize that you and only you has all the power.

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          • Tristan I thought that was Big Baby Davis for a second. I was like, d*mn he slimmed down a lot lol. Then I thought about how he didn’t play for the Celtics no more (you did say you were from Boston right?) and I realized it didn’t make any sense for you to put his picture up for yours. That ain’t a insult btw. It’s totally possible to look like a much better looking version of someone (sort of) famous lol

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  30. So, what say you? Are these okay times for a white person to use the n-word?

    We all know they use it ALL.THE.TIME so what is the big deal?!?! Context is the key factor in every situation and in this one there is no need for black folks to collectively get our pannies in a bunch over this tweet. Some people just love to get bent over EVERYTHING regardless of how trivial it is. Hey you offended folks why don’t you try using that energy to do something productive like I don’t know……ummmmmm….GET.A.LIFE!

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  31. One day, a couple of years ago,when I was in grad school, I was on campus and it seemed virtually deserted. I walked the same path I always did and there was a large white man standing along the way. He watched me approach and when I got within about a foot of him, he spat at my feet and called me that word.

    Another time more recently, my mother and I were driving home from the mall. Out of nowhere, we started being tailgated by a white man in a truck, hanging out the window, using that word. He followed us for miles, honking, spewing invective and making threats.

    A few months ago, I was working at an event hosted by the nonprofit I work for. Two volunteers came to sign in and while they filled out their paperwork, they sang the very song in question. I was working so I could only clear my throat and give them a strong look. Nothing like what I wanted to say…

    I guess my points here are these. First, clearly there are those who would still use this word against us. Personally, I don’t want to have to and I’m NOT GOING TO try to decipher if you mean me harm or not. Why would you even want to potentially put yourself in the same category as the people who mean us harm? Second, I think the historical context should be respected. Distance from the events equaling complacency seems like a disregard for the struggles of the people who went before us. Finally, we should all know the difference BW public and private speech. If you REALLY feel the need to rap along, at least have the decency to do so where you won’t offend.

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    • you should’ve pepper sprayed his azz!
      not for the ni**a part but the spitting…and you were alone…i think you could’ve cried self defense

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  32. Just thought I’d throw this in the mix, current French President Hollande used the song in his campaign. http://www.globalhiphopbattles.com/news/french-presidential-candidate-uses-nggas-in-paris-for-campaign-ad-video/

    Which is cute and cheeky until you realize a) the experience of blacks in France is vastly different than stateside b) the poor in Paris, both blacks and Arabs, are consistently the victims of racism; this song doesn’t empower them it glosses over the sucky situation many find themselves in.

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  33. I was so through with the “news” coverage on this. No one has a problem with dude calling the song “Nigg*s in Paris”, no one has a problem with dude performing the song and screaming the lyrics but we have a problem when someone in the crowd repeats it? [Nobody had a problem with going Gorillas?] I can’t. They out here eating people. I’m getting my Shane on. (I know Shane got murked, twice, but up until that point he was on his soldier sh*t.)

    “Are these okay times for a white person to use the n-word?”

    1. If a white person is on Wheel of Fortune in the final round and the exposed letters are NGGERS

    2. If he/she is unsure of how to pronounce “Niger”

    3. Scrabble and/or Words with Friends (never had opportunity to play that word; does it pass?)

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    • LOL @ Wheel of Fortune- “I’d like to solve the puzzle Pat! Is it N*ggers?” (crowd goes wild)

      Btw, Team Shane all day! He was the only one with any d*mn sense.

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    • Shane should’ve been murked. He popped all of that s**t about Rick being weak, let the walkers out off the barn, and what did he do when he saw Sophia? Nothing but wimper like a scared kid. After he doomed Sophia Rick should have walked over to Shane and said “That’s why I have the big hat and the big gun. And this is why you are who you are.” Hell, Dale knew he was a punk too.

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  34. I wrote about a similar subject on my blog earlier in the year. I still remember the first time someone called me a n*gger and meant it. I was only in kindergarten, but the way I felt in that moment stayed with me for a long time. I hated the way it made me feel and I still do.

    As many people have said, it’s a losing battle. I’ll shout from the rooftops that I hate this word and everything it stands for, but when it’s used so much in everyday conversation (by US), everyone feels safe using it. They get daps and laughs, so they assume it’s alright to use with everyone.

    I have ended friendships because of this word–black folks and white folks. As many words as there are in the English language, I have to believe you can find a better “term of endearment” than that.

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    • Thinking back I’ve only been called a “n!gger” by other black people! And I’m from the country. I do recall as a kid hearing a white girl telling a friend of hers not to “n!gger-lip” a cigarette they were smoking. I wasn’t sure how to feel about it.

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        • Really? I’m actually sort of shocked, but in a good way. That I can recall, it’s happened about three times: kindergarten, junior high and college. The college one pissed me OFF. And it was on MLK Day?!?!?!? They better be glad we didn’t go “Do The Right Thing” on campus!

          I’m in Oklahoma, BTW.

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          • I’m from the south and had never been called the word ever (not even from other blacks). Then we moved to Dublin. I’ve been called N* sprinkled with same slobbery vitriol that one would attribute to Bull Connor’s Birmingham.

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  35. I understand completely the bitterness towards the word.

    But the problem is that the more we try to suppress its usage, the more those that want to use it to offend us will take pleasure out of saying it privately AND publicly. I swear, this is one topic that I can never seem to take a stance on. I flip-flop on this issue more than Romney on abortion.

    My gut tells me to side with the argument that says putting the word out there and allowing people say it actually does help to open dialogue on race and the word eventually will lose its “stinging” power. Besides, most are smart enough to tell when it’s being said offensively or not and we need to stop being so sensitive if we are ever going to advance in this society.

    But then where do we draw the line? What do we do when others get so comfortable with saying it, that they just get outright disrespectful? Will it be our fault for letting it get to that point? And are we disrespecting our ancestors by letting it slide? Maybe we need to be more sensitive and mindful of our image to the global community.

    And why do we use it so liberally with each other? Does it come from some deep-seeded self esteem issue that comes from the fact that we were robbed of our culture? Or maybe, as a people, we have just become so strong (or immune) mentally to what this world has thrown at us that we actually do have the power to take what was once a negative and can now reconstruct it into a term of endearment. Has any other culture/people ever done that? I don’t know.

    I believe in South Africa they have made it against the law to use the word “kaffir” which is their equivalent to “nigger.” Use of the word is actionable in court. Maybe they are on to something. I don’t know.

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  36. For starters, before I begin my post there are a couple of things to get out of the way:

    One: “Watch The Throne” is wack as f*ck- the whole entire thing! And they want to charge a hundred bones for the vinyl? Kill yo’ self Kan, Jay and Def Jam!!!

    Two: Gwenyth Paltrow is a terrible actress. The only reason she’s only famous is because she has famous parents and a famous husband. Other than that, she ain’t nothing but a placeholder in a film. Ol’ Betty White lookin’ ass heffer!

    Now that I got that out of the way, I will say this in the most thoughful way. I don’t think Black people should get upset over 2520′s usage of the N-word- even though we have made it fairly easy for them to use. I do think the 2520′s could stand to brush up on their history to fully understand why that word has always been such a loaded word.

    With that said, Kanye and Jay-Z should have known what to expect when they made a song called “N*ggas In Paris”- and released the song as a single, no less!!!!

    Reply ↓

    • “One: “Watch The Throne” is wack as f*ck- the whole entire thing! And they want to charge a hundred bones for the vinyl? Kill yo’ self Kan, Jay and Def Jam!!!”

      Watch The Throne, was amazing. That is all.

      Reply ↓

      • Actually, I don’t even hate Gwen for this. I hated her MORE when she was on some award show and she introduced Anthony Hopkins as “Antony Hopkins” with a smug smile on her face knowin DAYUM well she ain’t from nann kingdom that is united. Bish from some dayum Cali like a mug.

        Yes, this is irrational hate… and prolly even more irrational than hating her for saying the N-word in a song (maybe not that much), but D’AH well. *flips hair*

        Reply ↓

      • No ya’ll aren’t.
        As I mentioned in the post that your wrote about WTT. I only liked 4 songs from the album. Those are the only four songs I’ll stream on spotify. I ain’t bought it, and I ain’t gon’ buy it…lol

        Reply ↓

      • “while i dont think WTT is horrible, i dont bump it at all. and i definitely don’t think its a tight album. me and you may be the only ones who feel this way”

        let’s keep it one hunnied here……

        this album is wet open azz! i paid 16 bucks for a CD and only listen two 2 or three rather forgettable joints. dudes with this type of talent could’ve done much better

        Reply ↓

      • No, you are not the only ones. I have all of Ye’s collection and most of Jay’s (actual cds). I burned WTT. Only real song that got played off WTT was “Gotta Have It” and that was only like two minutes and some change. The album reeked of laziness and mediocrity.

        Reply ↓

          • That was one of the more stand out joints, but I’m definitely not fond of what the Throne offered. It’s like they served up TV dinners when they could have offered a fine dining experience. I’m cool on the Throne. I’ll take my Yeezy and Jay served up straight.

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  37. I will share a funny story of when using N-word goes way wrong.

    I am from the Caribbean and honestly back home we use ninja all the time. It just doesn’t hold the stigma in the islands (well at least not on the one I am from) as it does here in the U.S.A. So, one year my then soon to be hubby and his entire family travelled to my homeland to spend Christmas with my family and we all decided to go to church. Anywho, there we are all in church and the Pastor is really getting into the sermon and all of a sudden he says “…..you know that ninja, Herod was crazy…”. My in-laws all gasped and nearly passed out as a group because they could not believe that the Pastor had just shoved the N-word into his Christmas sermon. So I said that to say this…..what was I saying?!?!?
    *walks away confused*

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  38. What a difference a few generations can make. In 2012 we can actually have Black continue to debate this subject. This show why we will always be second class citizens in the US. How quickly we have forgotten the beattings, lynching, and rapes that we were subjective to at will by another race of people. They could do this with no fear of punishment. No other race of people on the planet has embraced a racial slur like we have. We actually will justify it as being ok. In th 60′s thru the early 80′s it used to be our get of of jail free card. Some non black called you a n*gger and you could beat their @ss to death and as long as you had a witness, you were excused. Now look what we had to go and do devalue the power we had just to sell a different type of music. How stupid was that. It is a shame that for we have acomplish, we can’t wait to give it all back. Will we ever learn

    Reply ↓

    • i dont disagree with you. but i do think you have to acknowledge that times have changed for many of us. many of our youth either dont know their history or care. even many of us grew up in neighborhoods where the idea of a segregated life doesnt’ even register. i know tons of very wealthy adn well to do black folks who went to school with me and their concept of racism is very different than mine. so you’re right…perhaps my generation and those coming after us are flushing a lot of work down teh drain, but if that’s just b/c we dont get mad over the n-word then im not sure i think its a horrible thing.

      Reply ↓

      • Is it flushing work down the drain or is it progress? A result of that work? I do not agree with using the N word (I only use it if I’m joking or extremely upset. I use it more here than anywhere) but the fact that we CAN have this debate is a sign of our progress imo. I’m against the word but appreciate that we are in a place where some black people are okay with it while others are not. We have diverse enough experiences and view points for this to be the case.

        If current younger generations feel far removed from the lynchings, the rapes, the killings, the segregation… well, wasn’t that the whole point? We should never forget but we should loooooove the fact that many young black people can not fathom these things at all. If they want to “re-invent” the N-word and we want to debate it, sounds like progress to me. It’s no longer a universal “helllll no” you don’t use that word. It took me a while to see the value in this argument and I’m grateful, not ashamed, that we are in a place where we can have it. It doesn’t mean we’ve forgotten it just means we’re in a new place.

        Reply ↓

        • @MJoy

          My sentiments exactly…somewhat. You see how torn I am over this debate. I literally can go either way on it at any given minute.

          Is it really a good thing that younger generations feel so far removed from our brutal history that they are passed it? Maybe if we were truly living in a post-racial America it would be, but we’re not. But then maybe desensitizing the word is a step we have to take to help condition for a post-racial America. Again, I don’t know.

          Perhaps the reason Jay, Ye, The-Dream, and Russell Simmons are comfortable with Paltrow using the term is because they are rich as h*ll and whatever anyone says to them doesn’t matter. And then when others see them not caring anymore, then they think that it’s “cool” not to care too. Hmmmm.

          And for the life of me, can one one of you n****s please tell me what 2520 means????

          Reply ↓

          • I know what you mean. I used to be ADAMANT on this topic. It was no N-Word used by anyone, ever! But now I sway a lot. And I think it’s good that I’m in a position where I can sway and not be completely crazy for doing so (imo).

            2520 is white people

            25th letter of alphabet: Y
            20th letter of alphabet: T

            YT=White

            I swear this is explained about once a day. lol.

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  40. i don’t understand the backlash. its the title of a song. in that context i don’t mind. i do mind when white people use the word trying to be “down” or when they use it towards me (then again i don’t like anyone using that word towards me; black, white or brown). i’ve been called a n*gger maliciously by a white person on more than one occasion. i know how small the word can make you feel and gwyneth paltrow using the word didn’t bother me one bit.

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  41. Naw this ain’t a world issue or a huge cultural issue. But since conversation topics ain’t limited to that NOR does speaking your piece mean you think that, Imma let folks cook. Especially since Twitter outrage is usually limited to a few days unless it truly is something major.

    “See, “N*ggas in Paris”. Sure they could call the song “Paris” like radio stations were doing, but it sounds stupid”

    It does, but that’s the risk they take. Just like a radio station has to censor the word or risk a fine, white folks have to censor the word, or risk an eye jammy. Yes, they are different LEVELS of consequences, but the concept is the same.

    And she didn’t just name the song. She put “for real” at the end in order to hide behind the nice safety net of “BUT IT’S THE SONG TITLE THO!” Y’all know how bad white folks wanna use this word and it be okay.

    Which brings me to my next point on why they want to so badly?! Look. There are TONS of inclusive groups that I’ll never be a part of. Sororities, YMCB, Ashy People Coalition… but you’ont hear me whining because I don’t get to do their secret handshakes and ish. Why? Because I live in reality. Oh, and I’m not entitled, so there’s that…

    Reply ↓

    • Although the AKAs, YMCB (?) and the APC (*pulls out expired APC membership card) don’t have one of the hottest songs out in the world right now…the group she attempted to be a part of was the group of people who enjoyed the song and recited the lyrics.

      Reply ↓

      • LOL, I was talmbout Black folks and their use of the DUN DUN DUNNNN… N-word.

        That comparison was a general point about the word and white folks’ usage of it, not just Gwyn. This discussion will always inevitably lead to the bigger one.

        Reply ↓

        • +1 Cheekie- It’s much biger than the word. It’s about them refusing to allow a club that they can’t be a part of to exist. They hate being excluded but ironically have a culture that’s ALL ABOUT EXCLUSION. That’s the issue I have. Those entitled mofos just won’t let nobody else have sh*t exclusively. F*ck anybody non-black that feels entitled to use the n-word. If you wanna say it bad enough then we should be entitled to slap you as hard as we deem necessary everytime you say it. That way you can say you earned the right and sh*t

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  42. I’m half black and half white. The first time I was called a nigger (spelled out because it is – as many of you all pointed out – just a word like any other) in a derogatory way was when I moved from Hawaii to California and spent half a year at a school that was 90% black. And the students who used the word pejoratively: the black students.

    I grew up moving around to different countries and states, surrounded by every ethnicity, so when I started at this new school, I started making friends with everyone. Which didn’t fly with some of the black kids: “that little bitch is tryin’ to be friends with crackers and spics, don’t even know he’s just a nigga.” Needless to say, I was thrilled when I left that school and started at a more multiethnic school where the word was never used against me as an insult.

    Yes, once the word was a supremely derogatory word, and so I can see where some people are resentful of its current usage. Yet the thing that amazes me is that so many people don’t seem to realize that its current popular usage reflects the change in meaning that so many desire. For decades hip hop and rap artists have been selling their music to people of all ethnicities, making millions selling sounds that their fans adore. As is the case with all sorts of music, the fans eventually start to emulate the artists, and they say that emulation is the greatest form of flattery.

    I don’t think anyone has the right to sell something to a mass audience and then complain when those same people find the product so cool as to want to incorporate it into their own self. If people really feel the need to eradicate the use of the word, then it shouldn’t be used in music that is willingly marketed to people all over the world.

    Of course some people will always instill the word with its original venom, there is no avoiding that. The same thing happens with “bitch” and “slut”; in the US a fag is an insulting word for a homosexual, while in England “fag” is another word for a cigarette. It all depends on context. And if non-black people have learned the context of calling friends “nigga” as a term of endearment or using it in a neutral, non-pejorative manner, it’s because music that was traditionally made by blacks gave the word a new context. Don’t be mad about it, see it for what it is: the evolution of an extremely derogatory word into something more than its original hateful meaning.

    A bit long for a first post, but hey, that’s how it is sometimes. ;-)

    Reply ↓

    • “that little bitch is tryin’ to be friends with crackers and spics, don’t even know he’s just a nigga.”

      I have had this done to me as well. Talk about some a low self esteem self hatred reaction to a black person making friends outside of their own race. God forbid you talk to people regardless of their skin color.

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    • “A bit long for a first post, but hey, that’s how it is sometimes”

      but a good point nonetheless…welcome to the circle!

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  43. Gwyneth’s tweet as I understand it was “Nigahs in Paris for real”.
    Her response in defense of the tweet was “It’s the name of the song”. Basically implying get over it.

    I haven’t bothered with any further details of the situation, but here’s what resonates with me…

    Her saying “Nigahs in Paris for real” is condescending. It’s as if it was intended to imply “look at these Nigahs acting Nigah’ish in Paris… in other words, we are in Paris and these are Nigah’s.

    The “for real” portion of her statement is not a part of the name of the song, therefore, the “It’s the name of the song” response is invalid and irrelevant.

    On this basis, my verdict is that she is an elitist who is willing to party with those she feels are beneath her. I may be reading a lot into her statement, but I don’t believe I’m wrong.

    In the end, doubt it really matters.

    Reply ↓

    • Because I don’t feel like Googling- so the concert in Paris- perhaps her sentiment was meant to reflect the song itself being performed in Paris and not necessarily the performers themselves (“oh these n*ggas are in Paris for real!”)?

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    • “Her saying “Nigahs in Paris for real” is condescending. It’s as if it was intended to imply “look at these Nigahs acting Nigah’ish in Paris… in other words, we are in Paris and these are Nigah’s.”

      That’s how I took it as well.

      It’s kind of like the episode of The Office where Michael Scott thought it’d be funny to do Chris Rock’s infamous N*ggas vs. Black People bit.

      “N*ggas always want credit for some sh*t that they SUPPOSED to do!”

      So as not to beat a dead n*gga/n*gger horse, it’s obvious how one is poking fun at and policing your own, and another gives the impression of finger pointing at another race.

      I don’t think it’s a real story either way. I just don’t understand the lack of self awareness of how something may be taken.

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      • YES! I took her tweet to be more elitist than racist. Can’t stand her. As if she’d hang with those guys if they weren’t famous. Screw her.

        Reply ↓

    • This is exactly how I took it. I believe she was referencing the performers, calling them the n word… on twitter…as a white woman… a famous white woman. Do better.

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  44. Pingback: What 'Bath Salts' Will - And Won't - Make You Do | Day & A Dream

  46. Happy Birthday Liz!

    “Are these okay times for a white person to use the n-word?”

    It really kills me when white news reporters have the n***** in a story and say n-word. Please say the words, use quotation fingers, and keep it moving. I’ll give Terry Gross a lot of credit because she will say it with not hint of fear and keep the interview going.

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  48. Personally, I agree with the list PJ posted. More importantly, I think its usage should be OK in the context of history and literature. Let’s keep it 100. America has a racist history, and deleting a word isn’t going to get rid of that history. If anything, it renders it invisible, which is Not A Good Thing ™. I’m not saying I’m cool with White people saying it, but if some old, dead White guy used it, or a brother or sister used it, and it’s clear that they’re referring to their thoughts and not their own, I don’t care. Getting rid of one word doesn’t change American history one bit.

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  49. I was in attendance at the Watch The Throne concert in New Orleans and Ye gave the white people permission and insisted that they sing the song as is. IDK why but I was shocked at the enthusiasm they exhibited. They sang Nigs in Paris like 7 times consecutively and each time I reschocked.

    Reply ↓

        • Come on, image you like an artist but are never allowed to sing the lyrics to what may be one of your favourite songs because someone with a different skin colour might get offended. Hell yes you’re going to rock out when the artist gives you permission to let loose, when you suddenly don’t have to worry about death stares from people because you’re using “their” word.

          Reply ↓

      • It kinda puts alot of the Tea Party attacks in context. All these rights and privileges they are complaining about losing? Apparently what they’ve lost is the ability to be racists without being called racists.

        This N*ggas in Paris must have been a dream come true to some of their foot soldiers. Finally there is a safe place for them to express what’s on their hearts and minds w/o fear of retribution. LOL

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    • LOL, I was there too and when he did this, I laughed and STILL glared at the white folks in front of me, DARING them to say it tho. What’s funny is that throughout the show they kept jumping around and not caring folks saw them but oddly at this part, they kinda kept facing forward. They knew what was up. And what was up was that they were surrounded by tons of black folks who were super drunk and high off of alleged/obvious weed

      Here’s the thing. White folks are — for some reason — SUPER geeked to use this word after being told it’s not okay to. Sounds like little kid syndrome to me. Here’s another thing. I can’t control what folks say behind my back. I give NO fricks what they say behind my back. I KNOW they say it behind my back. I say ish behind theirs too. Whoop dee do. Here’s the difference in being an adult and knowing reality, tho. Say that ish to a group of black folks directly and see what happens… Yeah, that.

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      • Like… I don’t even understand the rationale behind what Kanye was doing. If anything it should have made him feel some kind of way in using the word and having them sing it.

        Like, the next time a white person sees you and says, “what up my n!gga” or “n!gga” please, what can he say? It’s one thing to make music for “the streets” or black people, but if you explicitly give people permission to use it once – why wouldn’t they continue to use it? You don’t get to un-ring that bell.

        Reply ↓

      • @ Erika

        They do this at every stop I believe. They run it back multiple times. Out of all songs they choose to run it’s this ish that gets replayed like a broken record.

        Reply ↓

      • 8 times in the Chi. And I enjoyed every replay. LA beat us in terms of record in the US… but yeah, I’m sure their ultimate goal was to get the most in Paris.

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  50. “And she didn’t just name the song. She put “for real” at the end in order to hide behind the nice safety net of “BUT IT’S THE SONG TITLE THO!” Y’all know how bad white folks wanna use this word and it be okay.

    Which brings me to my next point on why they want to so badly?! Look. There are TONS of inclusive groups that I’ll never be a part of. Sororities, YMCB, Ashy People Coalition… but you’ont hear me whining because I don’t get to do their secret handshakes and ish. Why? Because I live in reality. Oh, and I’m not entitled, so there’s that…”

    This also. I don’t understand their anger and desire for WANTING to use it.

    Bring up this topic any time and your Facebook/Twitter feed will be flooded with people saying that if you don’t want others saying it, don’t say it in rap songs. Which I GET. But if Asians or Hispanics threw around racial slurs toward each other, I wouldn’t be on the outside looking in like “Why can’t I say it too?” :-(

    It’s really not that serious.

    But as soon as an obvious racist situation happens those same people put on their “racism is dead and that was just a coincidence” hat. Paul Mooney said it best!

    “Everybody wanna be a n*gga, but nobody wanna BE a n*gga…”

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    • best believe those whites that cry about this, say nigga on a regular basis. their beef is that they want to be able to use it around black people be it for malicious purposes or to fit in without losing some teeth in the process….

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  51. personally, i call everyone and everything “nigga”. my favorite dog was named lil’ nigga, I once said “nigga please!” to a white professor (a white woman no less) during a spirited class discussion.

    in fact i might use the word a good eleventy times a day…….you see while highly intelligent, i am also unapologetic and unabashedly ignant. A contradiction i know but hey what can i say but…….NIGGA NIGGA NIGGA NIGGA!

    words only have the power we give them………

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    • ” using irony as a weapon against us by wondering aloud why we can refer to ourselves with such language but the second a white person does it becomes an issue”

      you know whenever white people raise this question it makes me wonder; why do they really want to say nigga that badly?

      i mean we all know that they say it when around nuthin but other white people

      if there are any very smart white peoples on here please don’t be scurred. enlighten me…Why do ya’ll think that it’s so unfair that we can call each other nigga but won’t let ya’ll use it around us?

      Reply ↓

      • DemonDog, you still out there? I’ve been thinking hard about your question, and I’ve got a few answers to it, but it will require several paragraphs of typing, and therefore I don’t want to type it up unless I know you’re here and we can have a long discussion and fix the world’s problems.

        So……you here?

        Reply ↓

      • funny thing was the look on her face. it was like all the blood drained out of it. and the class got so quite you could hear a fly queef.

        but she handled it like a G and defended her position…you know i don’t even remember what we were even debating. it was a philosophy of religion course and i think we were talking about free will…or was it star trek?

        they say the mind is the 1st to go

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  52. Because I’m from Florida (yes I will say this all day everyday till the Miami Heat is great again! F*ck you Celtics fans) and a first generation American, the n-word is tough for me to grip my mind around. When I think of it now I think of Trayvon Martin and how racism in post racial America is alive and well. I heard white people referring to Trayvon as a n*gger and my bloood boiled. TUK is right, for many white people it is the only word they know that can truly hurt Blacks. I think all Americans know deep down the historical and social context of the word. This is why whites who are cool with Black people are smart enough to use it only around those they know. There was a time I punched a mothafuca in the stomach for using that word. Now I refrain myself from giving you the satisfaction of getting a reaction out of me. The last time someone called me the n-word was about a month ago and…

    As a first generation American I was confused by African-Americans usage of the word. Growing up I thought ya’ll needed help. Still don’t understand why it is embraced but stopped giving a f. America is a strange place. But something I realized the first time a non-Black person called me that was: if your skin is black in this country no one gives a damn about how you see yourself.

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    • Oh, I think its okay for non-Black foreigners to use the word when asking “Why do Black Americans call themselves n*gga?” and “Can I say n*gga?” In which case an explaination should be given. Preferably by a Black person.

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  54. I can’t believe we are even seriously entertaining this argument. The ONLY way to use a derogatory term unique to a group is to do some sort of social commentary about it or under academic analysis, preferably one in which you examine unique terms across many groups (which is precisely why I had no issue when that flap developed at AwkwardBlackGirl over their use of the word Tr*nny. Their videos are very much social commentary, it was not used casually, and if they were offensive, at the very least they were equal opportunity offenders. They slaughtered all the sacred cows, not just one for one group). Let me tell it, there is no such thing as adoption by proximity. I don’t care if you grew up in the hood, or socialize primarily with black people, until you can accept all the burdens and privileges that come with it, you don’t get to use the term casually around me – PERIOD.

    I wonder why we resort to so many strawman and false equivalency arguments when it comes to justifying other races using the word n*gga, but make NO such weak and bankrupt arguments when it comes to pejoratives that apply to other groups?

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    • “I wonder why we resort to so many strawman and false equivalency arguments when it comes to justifying other races using the word n*gga, but make NO such weak and bankrupt arguments when it comes to pejoratives that apply to other groups?”

      Perhaps because other groups don’t commercially market their pejoratives and sell them as positives?

      Reply ↓

      • Good catch… I mean you rarely ever hear white people call other peope white people r*d necks or otherwise use the term, and they certainly don’t use it commercially (you know… if you’re predisposed to overlook a vast swath of Country Music, Jeff Foxworthy and every other white comedian that has exploited the meme, and Hollywood in general… no really good point.) Thankfully there is also no such thing as h*nkey tonk either further illustrating your point.

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        • I see where you’re coming from, but I think there’s a difference.
          I was curious about the origins of honkey tonk music, and it seems that the term predates the use of ‘honkey’ as a pejorative used by blacks for whites. But to be fair, maybe it has something to do with the times when honkey was a white-on-white slur.
          http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Honky-tonk

          Jeff Foxworthy got his laughs by making fun of rednecks, i.e. maintaining the negative connotation of the word (“If your dad walks you to school because you’re in the same grade, you might be a redneck”). Lots of comedians fall back on racial stereotypes to sell their routines, but they almost always fall back on the negative aspects.

          I’m not the biggest country fan, but I’ve heard my fair share, and I just don’t recall them all running around calling each other rednecks in their songs. Take a random sampling of rap and hip hop songs and a large percentage will undoubtedly include ‘nigga’ and present it in a positive light. I’m willing to bet that the opposite is true in a random sampling of country music.

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    • Word up, word life, word to your mother, and every other outdated phrase meant to signify agreement with word in it. I really am for rational discourse and I’m not reactionary at all, but I do find it disturbing that black people are afraid to even be offended by one of the most offensive words period.

      Are we so afraid of being seen as the angry black that we have to smile, dance a little jig and not take offense to the obviously offensive? I’m not advocating a race war or a government ban or any kind of punishment for using the N-word, but not even taking offense?

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      • It’s not about doing a jig, it’s about not taking a lazy stance on something. Either be against it all the time and stop supporting your favorite entertainers who have “n!gga n!gga n!gga” as their hook or accept the fact that you (we) have lost the exclusive rights to the word. We’re not so far removed from having to drink out of separate water fountains that offense is outrageous- I agree there- but to it for me it’s too silly to suggest that people not be “allowed” to, at least, sing lyrics to a song and at most use the vernacular of those they interact with.

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        • Waching you decry “lazy stances” while supporting your position with a false dichotomy is like irony brought to life. If irony was a wooden marionette, your statement just turned it into a real little boy for Geppetto to love. *SMH*

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      • “Are we so afraid of being seen as the angry black that we have to smile, dance a little jig and not take offense to the obviously offensive?”

        It’s not about fear. Some people, like me, are just flat out not offended by the word. It’s not worth the energy to swing on every single person who calls me “n*gger” just to get a rise out of me. Because once you lose your wits they’ve acheived their goal. To make you angry. They’ve won. I’m smarter than that. Just because a word is offensive to you or someone else, doesn’t mean it has to be offensive for EVERYONE. Just because people aren’t getting offended doesn’t mean we’re afraid to be ridiculed by Massa, that we don’t understand the historical context in which the word was used, that we’re stupid, etc.

        All it means, is that we have too high a self-esteem and other more important things to worry about than to cry everytime someone says a mean word that we don’t like.

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        • If I had time I would articulate a more detailed rebuttal to the “sicks and stones” argument. But the hear no evil see no evil may help you feel better about yourself, but it doesn’t foster any positive change.

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    • “…until you can accept all the burdens and privileges that come with it, you don’t get to use the term casually around me – PERIOD.”

      So when you’re at the concert and the white boy next to you sings the same lyrics you’re singing, you gonna swing on him? Good luck with getting people not to use words that their favorite entertainers use.

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      • So you know that I would be at this concert?
        And you know that I would be singing along?

        You’re assuming/projecting an awful lot here don’t you think?

        I still do not see any tenable logic that supports this notion that someone else gets to decide for me what should be my comfort level (i.e. If Kanye says n*gga in a song, he has effectively made the decision for everyone else that they should be comfortable with it’s use by people who are not black, cause they’re just singing along. And if we have any historical baggage or angst with that word we have forfeited it because, an artist has used it in a song, and to you, that’s enough.)

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    • “I don’t care if you grew up in the hood, or socialize primarily with black people, until you can accept all the burdens and privileges that come with it, you don’t get to use the term casually around me – PERIOD.”

      Precisely.

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  55. I would prefer non-blacks didn’t say it AT ALL. repsect my gangsta.

    I’m not about to say any other racial term in their presence, so i’d rather act like the word would make the proverbial elephant in the room start trippin and knocking stuff over and skewing the offender with one of those ivory tusks (i want the offender to think i’d completely kick their face in, although i probably won’t. I don’t like confrontations). I know this is about to sound messed up, but sometimes i feel like i GOTTA go in on somebody in the event they even think about saying it. I know this perpetuates the “angry black” stereotype, but peer pressure is a witch with a b. When keeping it real goes wrong…

    Although I did let it slide once. I heard these two Mexican teens use the N-bomb on my way to work one morning. And I ain’t say sh!t. One of them cats had “Zeta” tattoed on his arm. And not only do Zetas murk ppl, they murk ppl differently according to the offense that got you murked. I can only imagine what the one for “killing a black man cuz you used “nigga” around him and he confronted you” would be. I ain’t tryin to get laid across no tracks with my ALL my limbs gone and nigga wrote across my forehead. NOPE. NOT NEVER. Mexico is too damn close for that. And in context, he mighta been more of a nigga than me.

    S/O to the homie Liz!!!! Happy Firstday!!!!

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  56. I have a problem with Gwyneth Paltrow saying it because she’s Gwyneth Paltrow and she is one of the most self-entitled people in the world. Just because you hang out with rappers doesn’t make you entitled to speak like them. No free pass just because you’re Gwyneth Paltrow. It’s like when she said she’s the only person who can call Lenny Kravitz “Leonard.” *eyeroll* Get over yourself, girlie.

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  57. Ok, so I got a lot to say. I’ll try to split this into three posts, so I don’t have one of those posts that takes minutes to scroll past lol.

    1) NO WORD IS OFF LIMITS to ANYONE! If someone feels like saying it, they can. They just better be prepared to deal with the consequences of that choice. If someone feels like beating you to a pulp for saying it, they can. They also better be prepared to deal with the consequences of that choice.

    2) I’m amused and flatterd (At the same d@mn time!) that white people so desperately want the right to say n*gga. I mean seriously, it’s very telling that you have d*mn near every privilege known to mankind but you b*tch, moan, and cry hypocrisy at the idea of us having a “privilege” that you don’t have. Seriously why is it so rewarding to you to be granted the right to say that word? Is it because black people’s everyday slang is so cool and important that your not being allowed to fully engage makes you feel corny? Or is it because you hate the idea of someone having a privilege that you don’t have?

    3) If the word n*gga is synonymous with black person, I take it as a compliment when ANYBODY calls me n*gga. Even though I totally get why it offends people, and I don’t consider their feelings invalid, I personally just feel like I’m losing and that individual is winning if something they say to or about me can offend me. I understand that I can’t completely erase my feelings, but there’s a way to deal with them. First come to terms with the fact that this individual DOES NOT MATTER. I be d*mned if I ever let an irrelevant person piss me off. Family and friends? Sure, but a random stranger (whether they’re rich and powerful or some trailer trash that people of their own race are embarrassed to claim) will NEVER have any say in how I feel. Which leads me to my next post…..(to be continued)

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    • you could leave the post right here bruh….

      we sound like a bunch of frickin cry babies….yet at the same da*n time we treat each other far worse than any white person ever could treat us!
      words only have the power that you give them. the word ni**a has no power over me!
      but call me a beeyotch and we’ll have to throw them hands
      yeah i’m not perfect. i’m still a work in progress

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  58. I said before that I totally get where people are coming from when they are offended by the use of the term n*gga. I personally don’t allow myself to get offended because people tend to say things to get a reaction. There were two important social lessons I learned from middle school.

    1) If it bothers you, that only encourages people to keep doing it, because your reaction demonstrates whether or not they have power over you (and very few people shy away from the high that comes with being powerstruck) If you get all up in your feelings, SCORE! If you ignore them they’ll get bored eventually (but may come back and rag you more later). But if you go back twice as hard (without sounding hurt or upset) they either shut the h*ll up and leave you alone (cause most people that dish it out can’t take it) or try to kiss your @ss from then on so you don’t hurt their feelings again.

    2) Being sad/hurt/angry and explaining to people why you’re hurt validates them AND makes them feel in control. They’ll never really know what it feels like until they feel it. So you know what that means. Torch their @ss relentlessly until they’re the ones talking about their feelings and how “that’s not something to joke about”. They knew better, but they didn’t think you had the power to make them feel the same way. And if they didn’t know better, they do now. Some life lessons are expensive on the ole ego.

    3) It saddens me that we’re considering this a serious social issue. No articles about how to counter gentrification. No articles about how to educate ourselves without being dependent on financial capacity, no articles about how to get more black businesses up and running and why we don’t support the ones that exist more than we do. No suggestions for how to increase black unity and uplift ourselves (cause if you’re waiting on white folks to uplift us you’ll be waiting till Christ comes back at the earliest). No articles about how to improve the justice system so a Trayvon Martin situation could never happen in the first place. No articles on therapy for ex-cons or how to reintegrate them into society. No articles on black history before we arrived in America (or Black Wall Street and what they did right). In short, that ugly blonde b*tch that I don’t know from the man in the moon is getting more attention than black people that are actually struggling to find answers, and that pisses me off a lot more than her irrelevant @ss using the n-word. Petey, you my dude, but this site could be so much better. I’m not saying we should do a serious topic everyday (or even twice a week for that matter) but when we do a serious topic, it would help if it were a productive one. No shots fired, just food for thought. Imma come back and show love regardless, but considering I come here more often than I watch the news, it would be awesome if we really got some answers about the most pressing issues facing negroekind. That’s what it’s all about 3000 out. lol

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    • *Quietly stands next to hubby lookin all cute and trophy-wifeish as he runs for office*

      I was ready to disagree with you on your “ignore it or come at them harder because then they lose the power” stance but I agree with you overall. The problem with the “ignore it” theory is that we don’t want to acknowledge the overwhelming power white men, specifically, hold in this country and I don’t know if it’s even possible to hit them with something that will make them feel the same as the N-word could make us feel. We focus on taking that power away, ignoring them, making them look silly for the racist things they do but the truth is, this only works on an individual level and not on a grander societal level. If we “ignore” things like this on a larger scale, we are not giving the message that you don’t matter, we don’t care what you think, because white people DO matter. They are running ish. We only give the message that it’s okay or we are not going to fight back, which we should. This method may work with a middle school bully but not with a national institution of racist azz racism. Ok, so maybe I do disagree with this part.

      But the rest of it….

      *falling back into trophy wife submission*

      Preach on hubby!

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      • ” We focus on taking that power away, ignoring them, making them look silly for the racist things they do but the truth is, this only works on an individual level and not on a grander societal level.”

        When has society collectively got together and called us n*ggers? Like do they sing it in unison like the honky mass choir or what? I’m sticking to the topic of when it’s ok for a white person to call a black person a n*gga. Besides the whole idea of there being a such thing as a n*gger (as opposed to a stolen African human being) is just another method of distracting you from succeeding and empowering yourself. What good has us calling them out on it and going on angry tirades about racism and how it effects us done in the past? This is a serious question btw, because maybe I’m overlooking something…

        ” If we “ignore” things like this on a larger scale, we are not giving the message that you don’t matter, we don’t care what you think, because white people DO matter. ”

        But white people will matter whether we address their attempts at disrespecting us or not. The difference is when we spend time and energy complaining and saying “Hey you hurt my feelings!” that’s time and energy that we are NOT spending on fixing our community and shielding ourselves from their systematic racism, which is infinitely more offensive than words could ever be. Also how you feel and how you view yourself is what’s most important in life. White people’s feelings can be hurt, especially as individuals, but that’s less important than knowing who we are as people and what we need to be doing specifically to improve our lot in life. Just use ignorant people for what you need and keep it moving. The whites with authority and influence are the ones that spend energy belittling us and tampering with history in order to pad their own self-esteem. They seem like the needy ones to me. We’re losing when we spend energy explaining and complaining. Trust me when I tell you that. Focus on getting the laws that allow real discrimination changed, not on getting them to stop saying offensive things. As long as you can be offended they will continue to offend you. That’s a fact.

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      • we don’t want to acknowledge the overwhelming power white men, specifically, hold in this country and I don’t know if it’s even possible to hit them with something that will make them feel the same

        Exactly. Point is LETS FOCUS ON THIS…evening the balance of power. REAL power, not the power of a word. F*ck our hurt feelings. The key to power is to not get caught up in feelings. ACTIONS matter. We need to stop licking wounds that are centuries old and start bandaging them.

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      • Smh, always an instigator in the mix lol

        I can tell they don’t want this to be a serious site that gets too deep/depressing so I get why they don’t normally take it there, I’m just saying when you do take it there let’s be solution-oriented. Also let’s not do cliche topics where the solutions are more about emotions and sentiments than practicality. That’s clearly only a humble suggestion, not a shot at content.

        And yeah, I’m sorry but PA has already made me terrified of Clutch lol, plus I spend too much time on the internet as it is, I don’t need a new site to frequent…

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    • *looks around and whispers to JMTG*

      Who peed in your milk??!?!

      I kid I kid!!! I get where you are coming from and applaud you for your frankness. MJoy, please get him some lemonade I am sure he is thirsty after that speech.

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  59. One more time when it’s ok for 2520s to use the word:

    I once had a non-English speaking girlfriend who was learning English, and I had to use the word in order to have the “you never, ever use this word, and here’s why” conversation with her.

    Granted, that’s not a conversation that a person has very often in their life.

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    • Especially if they’re Japanese, you have to tell them that. After all, the phrase “ni ga” means “he/she said” in their language, and you don’t someone to get beaten to a pulp for having a convo with their cousin back home on a cell phone.

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  61. For all those who don’t see why this is a issue, I need you HELP. Find me every other race of people on the planet who will throw their racial slurs around like we do. I have yet to hear whites passing around honk*y or peekerw00d or asians happy to call each other sl0pe or g00k or latins who can’t wait to greet each other as sp1ck or jews giving it up for their kyte. I am also willing to bet that most of you don’t know these words exists. I still fail to understand why it has to be us. Do you really miss the plantation that much or the fact you weren’t around for jim crow and you feel left out.

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    • Tentpole: You will not find it and you know why? Because other races don’t air their dirty laundry, they cover that mess up, gift wrap it in nice little boxes with ribbons and hide it in a closet so their guest won’t see it. Black folks on the other hand love to put our crap on blast and hence what should be something we hold close to our bosoms has become the zing word of the ages (for all ages and races), ninja!

      Kevin Hart in TLAM made the comment “My people marched, fought, and died for the right to treat each other like shit.”…and that is funny as heck but the problem here is while all the other races have stick to the INSIDE JOKE only clause, black folks have steadily allowed an open door policy.

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    • but everyone of those races call each other nigga…

      the point is no matter how you feel about it….it’s there and it’s not going away.
      now we can continue to drag a podium out every time some one hurts our feelings OR we can do what the Jews did. pool our resources, spend our dollars with us, create institutions for us by us. congregate and mobilize for something that doesn’t involve dusty niggerdom ie….black beach weekend, NBA all star weekend, the release of some new jordans etc.

      lastly, we can start giving a fuq about our art and culture again.
      we gave hip hop away. we play step n fetch for a buck. our image is controlled by everyone else. no one gives a fux about us because we don’t gives a fux about us. it’s cool to be dusty and dumb ( waka flocka, gucci, nikki, lil’ wayne)
      these are the nigga’s we celebrate. this is our culture now.
      no one takes us seriously and why should they?

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  63. HAPPY BIRTHDAY LIZZZZZZZ! May it be wonderdul.

    This needed to be said PJ. I don’t give 2 craps and a pee that Gwen said n*ggA with the A. Who cares? I don’t. My feelings on the N word are this: If you don’t want anyone to use it, then don’t use it yourself. It’s the most hypocritical bunch of bull rule that Black people invented. Adding the A and only WE can use it? My people my people…we need to chill.

    I love this guy lol…can I n*gga get a pencil?
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VY16_nKORb8

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    • BOL! Thanks for bringing this one back SFG. My favorite part is at 1:20 “I repeated the same insult because that’s sort of what I’ve been trained to do.”
      Reporter: “The school district says that is NOT what they trained English teacher Paul Dawson to do”
      LMFAO!!!!

      I wish today’s discussion wasn’t over, I had a great idea of when it was actually ok for white folks to use the word, but since no one’s paying attention anymore I’ll save it for my own website lol

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  66. Top forty rap is like today’s Porgy and Bess. It simultaneously exhibits talented Black people but also 1.) Is made for a primarily white audience (pop chart crossover/mainstream award shows are seen as pinnacle of success) 2.) Depicts exaggerated and stereotypical themes confirming the worst. Porgy and Bess has some amazingly beautiful songs in it (“Summertime”) but it is basically about a drug addicted wanton woman escaping a brute to live with a crippled beggar and everyone ends up dead. Not exactly flattering… but ‘hailed as truth’ similarly as gangsta rap was ‘hailed as truth’ even though it was only true for a handful of people with unfortunate lives not an entire community.

    I dislike rap today… as I’ve stated in other posts and got chewed out for it… because the rappers are fooling themselves.

    Kane and Hova are joking themselves if they think they are breaking some barriers or if real white people in power are at all intimidated by them. They are not. The people on K street lobbies, Wall street, or the Forbes 400 richest Americans are not at all concerned with these fools. Remember the last Forbes list… it had a picture of Jay-Z next to Warren Buffet even though Jay-Z has literally a small fraction of the wealth that Buffet has. If Buffet tomorrow had Jay-Z money he’d slit his throat while falling off his penthouse window…

    Also, I find it interesting they are fascinated with this idea of ‘n-words’ in Paris… as if that is some novel idea. Shhh… guess what… Black American entertainers who were wealthy and successful often found themselves expatriating to Paris and other places in France… See: Josephine Baker, Richard Wright, James Baldwin, and Langston Hughes.

    Also, this idea their rap success is subversive or progress is also laughable because there have always been Black entertainers … which co-existed with racial terrorism, Jim crow, and even slavery.

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    • 2520: Code for refering to caucasians and sh*t. If said aloud, the 25th (w) and 20th (t) letters of the alphabet �y�-�t� sound almost exactly like �white.

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  69. Why is the word even still relevant these days?

    Clearly, there are a bajillion answers but when you think a bit it’s kind of childish that niggas get mad when a non-nigga says “nigga” (lol). Most people don’t even know why they get angry other than knowing they “should” be angry. If people stopped caring then the word loses power. Children are taught this in preschool (“ignore it and it’ll go away”). But this will never happen though because blacks (and even whites) with a platform tell us that we should get angry at and us (black) sheep have no choice but to abide.

    Also, black people flock to whatever the new popular lingo is without even knowing its meanings or origins. One of the most popular Southern dances is called “jigging”. Where do you think that came from? (Try: jiggaboo)

    And why are there no derogatory words for whites? Are there none or do they not mean anything because whites won’t allow themselves to be insulted?

    Let the hate go, if you really wanna stick it to the man go be successful…or have mulatto children.

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